"The Way of Water. Women Meditate Differently"

Katrin Jonas

THE WAY

OF

WATER

Women Meditate Differently

Turiya Publishing

© 2020 Katrin Jonas

Katrin Jonas asserts her moral rights to be identified as the author of this work.

Translation: Lisa Jonas

Editing: Katie Turner

Design: Katrin Jonas

Cover photo: Aleksei Bakunin, www.stocksnap.io

First published by: Innenwelt-Verlag, Köln 2018

Original Title: Der Weg des Wassers. Frauen meditieren anders

Disclaimer:

No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system

or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical,

photocopied, recorded, scanned, or otherwise without prior written permission of the Publisher.

Limit of Liability:

Every effort has been made to ensure that the information contained in this book is carefully selected. Neither publisher nor author can offer specific professional advice or liability to the individual reader. None of the techniques or suggestions introduced in this book are intended as a substitute for individual medical advice from your health care professional, therapy, medical advice or psychological help. The author and the publisher shall not be liable or responsible for any loss or damage.

For Lisa

Table of Contents

Introduction

1  The Body of the Woman is Feminine

Feminine - Masculine                 

The Female Body Flows               

The Power of Passivity               

Of Receptivity and Devotion              

The Sensory Spectrum of the Woman Is Infinite

2  The Female in Crisis      

Lost Femininity                 

Niche Symptoms and the Retreat of the Woman       

The Entrapment of the Power Woman           

Mental Over-Stimulation Is the Prison of the Woman       

3  Meditating in the Flow 

The Liberation of the Feminine             

The Magic of Body-Oriented Meditation               

Movement-Related Meditating Is Intelligent         

Active Meditations?                   

4  Chapter  The Way of Water in the Here and Now       

Creative Meditating with Free-Style Techniques     

Finding Stillness and Balance through Espresso Explorations   

Relaxation and Becoming Centred

Living More in Flow                 

Glossary                 

About the Author

Introduction

Women meditate differently

I can tell this because I am a woman. However, women only meditate differently if they embrace the feminine within. The more innately and naturally they are able to integrate their feminine aspects, the deeper and richer their experience of meditation will be. And vice versa: If women block their feminine energies, they quickly follow the male path of contemplation. To conquer thoughts and emotions through the power of concentration and focus can seem an alluring concept.

Hang on!, the meditation experts among you might intervene. The experience of meditation ought to be neither male nor female. According to many enlightened masters we are, at our core, neither man nor woman. We are pure consciousness. At our core, we are neutral.

Neutral me?

That’s right. In moments of inner stillness and detachment from what we call our ego, our sense of I am, every distinction between feminine and masculine indeed dissolves. Our being is all that remains, and that is gender neutral.

Nevertheless a woman will be deeply rewarded to live out her feminine qualities. When we first venture on our journey to the centre of our being, we have, for the most part, not yet experienced states of enlightenment and often only occasionally rendezvous with our neutral core. As women, we navigate life in our female bodies, which is often accompanied by a socially conditioned, gender-specific mind. Therefore, we also experience meditation through the filter of our self-image, our body awareness and our sexuality. All these components influence whether or not we are able to connect with the inner centre of our being.

Inner calm

Wait a second!, the experts in our midst may raise their hands yet again. Isn’t it our intention to detach from body and mind during meditation? Why else would we spend so many hours of sitting, if it wasn’t to escape our inner and outer turbulences? The body ought to be left behind, so we can reach a state of detachment from it.

This is true indeed. Meditation starts with the body and, at some point, also goes beyond it. For now, let’s leave it at that.

Meditation bench role plays

When we investigate the feminine approach to meditation, we can’t ignore the fact that the world of meditation is primarily dominated by men. As a result, a great number of women meditate without considering their female-specific needs. Many believe that the Holy Grail of meditation is to sit Buddha-like in lotus position, without ever questioning whether this style of meditation is in harmony with themselves and their bodies.

Experience frequently demonstrates: We have barely set foot on the path that is the female method of exploring our inner world. However, the time has come to embark on a new voyage. And with this book we are hoisting the sails.

The female within

Before we will delve into meditation practices together, I want to draw your attention to how feminine qualities originate in the biology of the female body. As the need for balance and inner flow are integral parts of the physiological functions of every woman, it therefore follows that it also has to be the impetus for female behaviour.

First, I’d like to establish this: While the role a woman plays in her life correlates with her relationship to her body and vice versa, the same phenomenon also affects meditation practice directly. Here, meditation functions as a magnifying glass. If a woman rejects her femininity, it will be reflected during meditation. As a consequence she will miss her chance of inner fulfilment and transformation.

As this is a very common occurrence, the first chapter will provide an outline of physical and emotional consequences that often arise if women forsake their femininity.

If a woman identifies with the masculine and adopts male values, she will develop an inner imbalance frequently connected with massive physical and emotional problems.

In order to restore equilibrium as swiftly as possible, I invite you to visit my so called Technique Bar in chapter three – a collection of meditation resources. There I introduce tried and tested meditation approaches that not only awaken your inner femininity but also add movement and creativity to your meditation practice.

I will also frequently encourage you to spend time in the virtual Me-Time Lounge, where you can take notes of your experiences and responses to the practical impulses provided in this book. These records of your reflections will quickly prove to you which style of meditation is most suitable for your personal constitution.

Living in the flow

Finally we will integrate meditation into our life, which, for us women, resonates with the very nature of our being.

The many suggestions and impulses introduced in this book will show you how finding your centre can be interwoven with your personal activities throughout your day.

Meditative experience ceases to be separate. Instead, our unique perspective as women will be enriched by a flowing quality that correlates with the flow of life moment to moment, the way of water.

1

The Body of the Woman is Feminine

Feminine - Masculine

The starting place

This book is neither a feminist book nor is it directed against men. It is not my intention to shine a spotlight on women as superior human beings, and I certainly do not intend to pamper the female ego. Nevertheless, it is in the nature of this topic: As I cannot explain the under-development of femininity and lack of female spirituality without touching on the origins of masculine dominance, the impression of an against-the-man agenda is quickly evoked. In a way, I risk being accused of heating up the battle of the sexes.

You know what? It is a risk I take gladly. If the end result is that you as a woman finally give your own authentic needs a strong inner voice, retrieve your hidden spiritual gifts from the safe and integrate all this into your meditation practice, I will be pleased and very much at ease.

Womanhood in a masculine world

At first glance we could treat and shrug off the entire topic of femininity as a private matter for each individual woman. What’s the big deal? If a woman and a man are satisfied with their situation, no matter how pear-shaped, unfair or otherwise, everything’s hunky-dory. If both parties consent, everything is fine.

That’s exactly what it isn’t. If we observe our present-day world, we are looking at the consequences of an extremely masculine line of attack that dominates human interactions and our living conditions. Violence, environmental destruction, wars, competitiveness, performance obsession, exploitation and the frequent fear-spreading news of terror attacks are the tangible results of excessive masculine deeds.

Too many people suffer, and in the highly developed industrial nations it’s particularly the women who suffer. They suffer from their dissatisfaction, inferiority complexes, their anguished bodies, from their emotional break-downs and depressions, from sexual dissatisfaction and their never resting minds. Moreover, the #Me-too debate on Facebook has clearly demonstrated where the modern woman is placed in relationship to the power-obsessed man. We can now clearly read on our Facebook timelines what the fighters of the women’s movement were ridiculed for a few decades ago, and for too many men, the woman is still an object that can be utilized in any which way they think.

Therefore, no! It is not a private matter whether or not to engage in the development of the feminine energy resources within us. One-sided masculine values have turned our world into a war arena, even though these male energies certainly have the potential, if feminine and masculine elements were harmonically balanced, to become a playground for creativity, joy and abundance.

The woman underground

Are you already protesting? Do you believe that all this is strongly exaggerated, too embellished and presented out of proportion?

Unfortunately, it is not. In my line of work as a body-mind trainer and meditation mentor, I mostly encounter women who suffer from massive physical and emotional symptoms. The majority of them directs almost one hundred percent of their energy towards the effort of guiding themselves according to the rules of this masculine constructed world. Often they blame themselves and feel guilty if they are not able to meet the masculine status quo. And: Many women allow years of their life to pass by without ever becoming aware of their innate feminine potential.

I don’t exaggerate by a long shot when I claim that our world is functioning in a masculine-oriented way through and through, in which women play little part. They are given permission to have a tiny slice of the cake that has been baked for men, and we are not even including countries in which women are still completely under-privileged, stuck in outdated patriarchal structures and live as property, concubine, servant or decoration for men. Not to mention that the current flood of migrants also highlights the status of these women. Upon further examination, it remains a fact that globally the woman is still a second-class human being.

Historically

Unfortunately, the problem is that our societal structures that sustain this one-sided, masculine-functioning life were not created yesterday but over many centuries. Apart from the early matriarchal societies, the feminine has always been under-represented because women did not have a real public voice. Until the last century, her hormonal blossoming years were dedicated to giving birth to children, raising them and providing a home for the family. Publicly, a woman didn’t have any say, not even if she was working in a profession.

At the heart of the matter: These structures are deeply ingrained. Despite the right to vote, the contraceptive pill, equality measures only slowly dissolve. A woman still has to adjust her own actions in order to be allowed entry to a platform shaped and created by the masculine mind. Quite often women have to conceal or banish their feminine qualities, especially when they would be most called for. They have to operate in a way that completely counteracts their inner knowledge and natural aptitudes. Even if a woman is successful in business, she is often referred to as the boss or that she is wearing the trousers. In many ways a woman lives like a fish out of water, and without water, swimming in the river of life can be quite a drag !

Fish in the water

What has to happen? I can see three deciding factors.

bullet Wake up to a new awareness!

As life in our society favours masculine rules and as feminine qualities are still under-represented in our world, the first thing that has to happen is that women become aware of this circumstance and start engaging with their femininity. Each individual woman should explore what it actually means to be in tune with her feminine qualities – and use this knowledge for her meditation practice.

bullet Get a feel for what's called the inner knowing!

As the lack of awareness and the resulting absence of self-reflection result in physical and emotional problems for many women, it is vital to find access to resources that can help to turn their situation around. The development of body awareness and inner knowing through meditation will assist in escaping this female entrapment.

bullet Develop your full potential through meditation!

As the masculine approach also dominates the world of meditation practice, a woman has to discover her own individual feminine way. I put great emphasis on this because it is imperative that a woman has full access to her female attributes in meditation. Only then does she have a real chance to feel good in her own skin and unfold her potential.

These three key factors are important to remember. Since we are now living in the twenty-first century, increasing numbers of women and men are becoming aware of this and are beginning to open their eyes and hearts. There is a reason why, since the millennium, we refer to this time as the century of the woman.

Energy related

Even though I attribute feminine qualities to women and the masculine to men, this is not completely accurate, as both men and women carry both parts within - masculine and feminine. Most people are not even aware of this, as this is neither typical in our culture nor taken into consideration by our medical institutions.

For instance, if we briefly investigate the system of Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM), we discover the concept of Yin and Yang, embodied by its symbol with its black and white components representing these equal energies. These complement each other. Whereas the Yin corresponds to the female, the soft, the yielding and receptive element, the Yang stands for the masculine, the active and externally focussed constituent.

Even though both elements are in balance, a woman still has more feminine qualities than a man because she resides in a female body. Even when we experience a woman as very masculine, her constitution is more feminine than the most feminine man and vice versa; a man has more masculine qualities than a woman. There are many very feminine men who still will be more masculine than the most masculine of women, as again they live in a male body. Without addressing too much of the current gender debates, let’s take note that a woman who is born into a female body is more woman than man. This is purely based on her physiology and the anatomy of the female body.

Imbalances

In the bigger picture it is about creating appropriate and natural balance between both parts of the inner and outer world. Here we encounter the core conflict between masculine and feminine. Exactly where feminine and masculine elements could link up, enrich or complement another, the struggle begins.

That is partly because many women never fully develop their feminine qualities due to lacking an appropriate platform, and others have neglected these qualities as they are not in very high demand. They often create their own niche and hide away from their true potential. Other women lose themselves in striving to compete with men. They set themselves up as masculine and powerful women, not only in their behavioural expression but unfortunately also when it comes to their sensitivity.

Because of this we experience a serious lack of feminine qualities even in the life areas that require femininity, which is one of the reasons why the idealistic sounding theory of ideal balance between feminine and masculine often remains nothing more than an illusion. If the feminine qualities of a woman are not developed or are misinterpreted and buried underground, they are therefore not available to be accessed where needed. Then we don’t even need to talk about balancing or complementing energies. Theorizing will remain just that and prove to be without substance and in itself hollow.

Bringing the feminine to blossom

Allow me to define a basic term.

When I talk about the feminine, I refer to inner qualities that encompass the flowing, receptive and passive elements as well as the life-giving, holistically-oriented and harmony-focussed potentials of a woman. You can view these as energy, as an impetus or power of expression, or simply understand it as a way in which women move through life by modes of operating, reacting or making lifestyle choices.

When we delve into these innate energies, they indeed resemble the ways water moves and behaves: it can bubble, gush, stream, percolate, flow, churn, surge, spray, splash, drip or trickle. It can flood, saturate, boil up, evaporate or pour down. It can spray like a geyser, it can thunder like a waterfall, it can create rapids and whirlpools or be utterly still like a lake. The feminine indeed unites many different characteristics that - and I can predict that for you with certainty - touch on incredibly many areas of our life. They are the most effective the more they are united and bundled together - the more flowing they are allowed to be.

The