My Heart, Ever His: Prayers for Women
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About this ebook
In My Heart, Ever His Barbara Rainey shares 40 prayers for women. They can meditate on one prayer throughout the week or read a prayer a day for 40 days as a way to express the longing of our hearts to our Father who loves us even as he sees who we truly are. Like the psalms of David, these prayers are honest, sometimes raw. Barbara uses these transparent expressions of common experiences to encourage us to surrender to Christ and help us see God as he is, not as we assume him to be.
My Heart, Ever His provides a stepping-stone to help you become more transparent with God and discover his welcoming embrace.
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My Heart, Ever His - Barbara Rainey
I cried through these pages, finding a friend who knows winter and who finds God within her winter. Barbara’s vulnerable reach for God is a poetic invitation to my soul . . . to discover Him, right here in this weak frame of mine.
Sara Hagerty, bestselling author, Unseen and Every Bitter Thing Is Sweet
Stunningly candid, Barbara’s prayers of lament will resonate in every woman’s heart. Precious few know how to struggle and to do so with the wonder of the gospel. Barbara calls forth lament and allows sorrow to rise, but always lands with praise to our Savior and King.
Becky Allender, cofounder, The Allender Center
Barbara Rainey’s words speak into the heart of every woman who earnestly seeks God. She graciously shares about the seasons of suffering she has endured as a wife, a mother, and a follower of Christ. Barbara reminds us that our unanswered questions keep us reliant on our one real hope, Jesus.
Teresa Coelho, founder, Power of Modesty
Barbara’s beautifully poetic and personal prayers will help readers to bridge the gap between life’s confusing, messy realities and the solid truth of God’s Word. In her honest conversations with the Lord, we see evidence of the Holy Spirit’s work of intercession, comfort, and guidance leading to renewed peace and steadfast trust.
Marianne Householder, leadership development specialist, Athletes in Action
"My Heart, Ever His is more than a compilation of heartfelt prayers and accompanying Scriptures. Barbara Rainey inspires the reader that to commune with God is essential in all seasons of life. It is an unquenchable thirst for more with God."
Karen Loritts, pastor’s wife, author, speaker, Bible teacher
In these pages I found my head nodding, my heart validated, and my eyes continually turned to the Lord. Barbara’s journey through the seasons of life has produced a rich depth, understanding, and sagacity often missing in today’s instant-gratification, quick-sound-bites world.
Vivian Mabuni, speaker and author, Open Hands, Willing Heart
These prayers are soul care. Discover the grace awakening of being raw-honest with yourself and God. About anything! Barbara’s vulnerable confessions hunger for hope. Her ruminations cry out for divine wisdom. Drink deeply from this outpouring, and you will be encouraged to name your own struggles. Our Father welcomes our voice.
Joanne Thompson, author, Table Life: Savoring the Hospitality of Jesus in Your Home
Barbara’s beautiful words and authentic prayers stir your soul to draw closer to God. Her prayers touch every part of your life—when life is easy and when life is painful. The truths of her writing sink down deep to encourage and comfort your very soul!
Ann Wilson, co-host, FamilyLife Today
This collection of prayers
is dedicated to my dearest Friend,
the Holy Spirit.
It was His idea to write these prayers,
planted in the soil of my heart.
His illumination inspired the topics,
provided specific words,
gave clarity
and clear guidance.
Thank You
O Spirit of Christ
for Your unending companionship
and nearness.
I address my verses to the King.
May You be pleased.
Psalm 45:1
Throughout, prayer segments that were inspired by specific passages of Scripture are indicated by blue text. The corresponding references are in the chapter’s footnote.
Contents
Cover 1
Half Title Page 2
Title Page 3
Endorsements 4
Dedication 5
Introduction: Why Pray? 11
1. Daughters of the King 17
2. Resting in Your Plan for Me 19
3. In Need of Sleep 22
4. Upon Awaking 26
5. Husbands 30
6. Answers Unseen 34
7. This Present Detour 37
8. Unseen 40
9. Upside-Down Kingdom 46
10. The Gamble of God 50
11. Marriage 53
12. I’m Afraid 56
13. The Comparison Delusion 62
14. To Be Named 65
15. My Heart, His Home 70
16. My Dearest Friend 74
17. Marveled 77
18. Soul Sufferings Are His 82
19. Sabbath 87
20. Disappointed with God 91
21. Learning Your Voice 95
22. Favorites 99
23. Christmas Card Photos 103
24. Why Me? 108
25. To Be Beautiful 112
26. Suffering in Marriage 115
27. Sex 119
28. Beauty Beckons 123
29. Borrowing 126
30. Do You Want to Get Well? 131
31. Surrender 134
32. Aging 137
33. Marys and Soul Sisters 141
34. Traditions 145
35. Heaven 149
36. New Assignments 153
37. Letting Go, Holding Fast 157
38. Advent 161
39. The Incarnation 166
40. One Day 169
Notes 173
Copyright Page 174
About the Author 175
Back Cover 176
INTRODUCTION
Why Pray?
WHO HASN’T FELT prayer is futile? Does God hear? Does He care? we wonder.
These universal questions most often arise out of our disappointments or sorrow. Personal loss of any kind reveals our fears about God and ourselves: Is God in control? Does He see me? How am I supposed to live with what’s happening in my life right now?
The Psalms pose similar questions. They are earthy, gritty, raw.
Why, O Lord, do you stand far away? Why do you hide yourself in times of trouble?
PSALM 10:1
David and others wrote these prayers, laments, and songs with words that shock us in our present walking-on-eggshells culture. No one knows what to say or not say for fear of offending at work, at school, with neighbors, or with strangers. Then at church there is an atmosphere of niceness, a false everything-is-okay exterior mask we feel compelled to wear to prove God is making good.
But when we are alone . . . when it’s just me and God . . . how do I talk to Him?
How do I not offend the Creator of the universe? I feel silly sometimes talking to Him, because normal, shallow relational approaches feel ridiculous or embarrassing before the throne of God Almighty.
———
Suffering has been a very unwelcome part of my life.
Winter came again recently for me. Not like other winters, for God doesn’t copy and paste, but works perfectly and individually for what I uniquely need to know and experience of Him. This new season of loss took a completely different shape from previous winters of my life. A different kind of cold settled in; not the sharp, brutal sub-zero kind, but a cloudy, damp, chills-to-the-bone cold. Like a slowly creeping fog that settles and stays, this season of loss was an ill-defined cloud, daily thickening