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    Abuse: Who Pays the Price?
    Abuse: Who Pays the Price?
    Abuse: Who Pays the Price?
    Ebook89 pages1 hour

    Abuse: Who Pays the Price?

    By Nuel Onowuko

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    About this ebook

    Everyone suffers and pays the price for abuse directly or indirectly, but the degree to which we respond is largely determined by our knowledge of the abuse-creating stimuli (real or abstract) and how to break the circle.

    Were you abused as a child? Are you being abused and you do not know it? Are you perpetuating an abuse without knowing you are? Are you being swept along with the pleasure-mad throng of an abusive environmental influence and think it normal?

    Are you bound in an abuse in your quest for freedom? Do you consistently rationalize your error even when conscience tells you that you are wrong? Do you appropriate abuse to inanimate objects or other people without a reference to self?

    Who pays the price for the abuse that occurred years back, and why has the price for an abusive thought, a seemingly innocent act, become so heavy a burden to bear? Are your actions, positive or negative, creating definite objective stimuli those little feet behind you are sure to follow? How do you deal with that thing that takes over for you when you do not want to repeat this abuse?

    The answer to these questions and many others are the information contained in this material aimed at helping you demystify abuse. It is my ultimate desire that this book ends all your search and research for compulsive abuse and abusive stimulants.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherTrafford Publishing
    Release dateFeb 13, 2014
    ISBN9781490727707
    Abuse: Who Pays the Price?
    Author

    Nuel Onowuko

    Nuel Onowuko is an educationist with a passion for excellence and has taught and worked among many young people as a teacher and a music instructor. He holds a bachelor’s degree in vocational education (agriculture) from the Delta State University, Delta State, Nigeria, and a national certificate in education from the Federal College of Education, Ogun State, Nigeria. He also holds a music certificate from the Music School of Nigeria (MUSON), Lagos, Nigeria, and directs a youth music group in Delta State. He speaks in seminars and youth conferences on contemporary issues facing the world of youths. His hobbies include researching, reading, singing, listening to music, and interacting. He lives in Warri, Delta State, Nigeria.

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      Book preview

      Abuse - Nuel Onowuko

      ABUSE:

      WHO PAYS THE PRICE?

      NUEL ONOWUKO

      Order this book online at www.trafford.com

      or email orders@trafford.com

      Most Trafford titles are also available at major online book retailers.

      ©

      Copyright 2014 Nuel Onowuko.

      All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without the written prior permission of the author.

      ISBN: 978-1-4907-2768-4 (sc)

      ISBN: 978-1-4907-2769-1 (hc)

      ISBN: 978-1-4907-2770-7 (e)

      Library of Congress Control Number: 2014902721

      Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

      Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models,

      and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

      Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.

      Trafford rev. 02/12/2014

      22970.png www.trafford.com

      North America & international

      toll-free: 1 888 232 4444 (USA & Canada)

      fax: 812 355 4082

      Contents

      ACKNOWLEDGMENT

      INTRODUCTION

      CHAPTER ONE: IDENTITY CRISIS

      What is in a Name?

      Agents of Abuse

      Deliberate Inhibition

      CHAPTER TWO: THE ABUSE

      Types of Abuse

      Self-Abuse

      Mental Abuse

      The Mix: Self-Abuse versus Mental Abuse

      Verbal Abuse

      Physical Abuse

      Sexual Abuse

      Religious abuse

      Emotional Abuse

      Commercialized Abuse

      Environmental Abuse

      Idiosyncrasy—a Choice View of Living?

      Attitudinal Suicide

      Societal Genocide

      CHAPTER THREE: THE ABUSER

      Power of the Abuser

      Process of Abuse

      Abuse and Sin

      CHAPTER FOUR: CHANGE: A REALITY OR A MIRAGE?

      An Appeal to Change

      What Denominations May Not Do for You

      CHAPTER FIVE: BREAKING THE CIRCLE

      Circle of Abuse

      1. Acknowledge the Abuse

      2. Admit Your Weakness and Your Need of God’s Grace

      3. Forgive Your Abuser

      4. Prayerfully Disconnect Yourself

      5. Engage in a Spiritual Counseling

      CHAPTER SIX: REAL RELATIONSHIPS

      What Abused Persons Need

      What Do You Want?

      Who Is Your Friend?

      Types of Friends

      Frenemy

      The Imaginary Friend

      Friend with Benefit

      Cross-Sex Friend

      Best Friend

      Renew Your Mind

      Thought Genetics

      Divine Law of Perpetuation

      CHAPTER SEVEN: SPIRITUAL COUNSELING

      What Is Spiritual Counseling?

      Why Repeat an Abuse?

      Demonic Interference

      CONCLUSION: TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN

      GOD CARES ABOUT YOU

      NOTES

      ACKNOWLEDGMENT

      With special thanks:

      To Emmanuel Samuel Kezia, for your physical, moral and spiritual support as a brother and friend. Your motivations birthed this dream of my heart.

      To my family, for your love, care, and support for me during this work.

      To all the young people I have worked with as singers, students, and scholars in sharing matters relating to academics, music, faith, and life.

      To the children and youths who have chatted with me and sent in e-mails and letters, for sharing your struggles, joys, longings, and desire for self-realization and self-actualization.

      To all my friends and mentors, for your painstaking efforts to proofread this writing.

      To all my pastors, for your encouragement, support, life-saving prayers, and life-changing words.

      And to all abused persons struggling resiliently to stand on their feet again. I would not be doing this without knowing the agony of your heart.

      I respect, admire, and look forward to seeing you victorious in this life.

      INTRODUCTION

      One of the biggest challenges facing families, schools, churches, and individuals is the influx of abusive stimulants that are fast eroding the moral, academic, spiritual, and physical heritage bequeathed to our youths. For many, the pace of abuse has become too fast, like being on a treadmill that just would not stop.

      More young people are getting hooked up in self-destructive activities, alcoholism, drugs, sexual escapades and perversions, and cultism without knowing the schemes at work, and society has not helped either, but rather it has made matters worse by stigmatizing abused persons and legalizing such abusive acts.

      More heart sickening is the increasing number of naive and innocent, children that are sacrificed on the altar of lusts of gullible adults and promoters of evil. Come to think of the tremendous burden of fear, guilt, and estrangement that adds to the loss of such innocence.

      Who is paying the price for your abuse that occurred long ago, you or your abuser or someone out there manipulating you to act in ways you would not ordinarily want to? Is there something that takes over for people against their will to effect the abuse of self, sex, drugs, liquor, and power? Do people live in an abuse and do not know it? Is there a way out of this kind of abuse you find yourself in?

      This book, Abuse: Who Pays the Price, will help you in many ways. You will learn and understand the root of abuse and deal with it from there, giving it a one-time fix. The reason I am so confident that the ideas in this book will work for you is because they have worked for many. This book offers information on the following:

      •   Identity Crisis

      •   The Abuse

      •   The Abuser

      •   Change: A Reality or a Mirage?

      •   Breaking the Circle

      •   Real Relationships

      •   Spiritual Counseling

      Even though the ideas in this book may seem to offer a quick-fix solution to your abuse, you may have to read and apply them over and again, slowly and prayerfully until God, [through the Holy Spirit] performs a supernatural work in your life, lifting you from being abused to being abducted into the family of God.

      CHAPTER ONE

      IDENTITY CRISIS

      "Sow a thought, reap an act; Sow an act, reap an action;

      Sow an action, reap a habit;

      Sow a habit, reap a character;

      Sow a character, reap a destiny."

      —Emerson Ralph Waldo

      The abuse in which you find yourself today all began with a thought! That thought started either with you or with someone else; and as the thought is given expression, an act or action is effected. From that singular thought, a whole character and destiny is built. It is all in a thought.

      Have you wondered why pet names and nicknames stick longer than original names of musicians, wrestlers, celebrities? Names are important in making us.

      What is in a Name?

      A name is a reputation that somebody has or the opinion

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