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    The Magic of Willpower: Discover the Key to Inner Strength and Unlock Your True Potential
    The Magic of Willpower: Discover the Key to Inner Strength and Unlock Your True Potential
    The Magic of Willpower: Discover the Key to Inner Strength and Unlock Your True Potential
    Ebook131 pages2 hours

    The Magic of Willpower: Discover the Key to Inner Strength and Unlock Your True Potential

    By Bella Tindale

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    About this ebook

    Most people want to change something about themselves or the way they live their livesperhaps they want to quit smoking, lose some weight, or learn a new language. Too often, people set these goals but seem to be unable to achieve them; their successes or failures depend entirely on their willpower.

    For some people, the quest for willpower seems as impossible as the quest for the Holy Grail. We want to have strength of mind and determination when we decide to make a life change, whatever it may be.

    Author Bella Tindale has researched willpower extensively and now offers her findings in this helpful, accessible guide. She explains how to unlock this force that is within each of us, providing the tools and strategies necessary to keep motivation alive, resist temptation, and handle obstacles and setbacks without deviating from our goals.

    Through The Magic of Willpower, you can gain confidence as you face new challenges while being at peace with yourself and with those around you.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherBalboa Press AU
    Release dateApr 18, 2013
    ISBN9781452509853
    The Magic of Willpower: Discover the Key to Inner Strength and Unlock Your True Potential
    Author

    Bella Tindale

    Bella Tindale was born in Germany and grew up in different parts of Africa, Belgium, France, Germany, and the United Kingdom. From a young age she showed a keen interest in philosophy, psychology, and self-help literature. She works as a counsellor and enjoys playing the piano when she’s not busy writing. She currently lives in Western Australia with her husband, five of their ten children, and numerous pets.

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      Book preview

      The Magic of Willpower - Bella Tindale

      Copyright © 2013 Bella Tindale

      All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the publisher except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

      Balboa Press books may be ordered through booksellers or by contacting:

      Balboa Press

      A Division of Hay House

      1663 Liberty Drive

      Bloomington, IN 47403

      www.balboapress.com.au

      1-(877) 407-4847

      ISBN: 978-1-4525-0984-6 (sc)

      ISBN: 978-1-4525-0985-3 (e)

      Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

      The author of this book does not dispense medical advice or prescribe the use of any technique as a form of treatment for physical, emotional, or medical problems without the advice of a physician, either directly or indirectly. The intent of the author is only to offer information of a general nature to help you in your quest for emotional and spiritual well-being. In the event you use any of the information in this book for yourself, which is your constitutional right, the author and the publisher assume no responsibility for your actions.

      Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

      Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.

      Balboa Press rev. date: 04/12/2013

      Contents

      Introduction

      Chapter 1    What Is Willpower?

      Chapter 2    Actions and Their Consequences

      Chapter 3    Become Aware of Your Thoughts and Actions

      Chapter 4    The Power of Decision

      Chapter 5    Know Yourself and Know What You Want

      Chapter 6    Self-Esteem and Self-Image

      Chapter 7    Choose Your Goal

      Chapter 8    Keep Your Eyes on the Prize

      Chapter 9    Willpower—A Source of Enduring Happiness

      Chapter 10  Willpower—The Power to Resist Temptation

      Chapter 11  Willpower—The Power to Stay Motivated

      Conclusion

      Suggested Reading

      About the Author

      To my sister, Sophie Kratz.

      There may be oceans between us, but I always feel close to you. Thank you for your understanding, your support, and your unwavering love.

      Introduction

      As a practicing private counsellor, I have come across many people who want to make lifestyle changes such as losing weight, giving up smoking, or overcoming procrastination. I would suggest strategies and action plans, only to hear the objection But I don’t have any willpower. This is how I came to write a book about willpower—because it is probably what we need the most when we embark on a journey of self-improvement.

      Most of us want to achieve success and lasting happiness, but success means something different to each of us. There is material success, such as money, and psychological success, such as stability, satisfaction, serenity, and a sense of direction. While we may honestly want to change, we tend to dislike alterations to our routine and avoid stepping out of our comfort zone. We may even be frightened of it, as it can be unsettling, something we’re not used to: a challenge.

      Sometimes we’re forced to adapt to circumstances that are out of our control. This can happen through marriage, the birth or adoption of a child, a new job, or a medical diagnosis. The need for improvement may arise from within ourselves because we’re dissatisfied, or because the way we’re doing things is no longer to our advantage. Maybe we’re used to grabbing a smoke or a drink whenever we need to unwind, but now we want to stop relying on these crutches because they are detrimental to our health and budget. We want to free ourselves from these habits as we’ve become slaves to them. We know it’s time to do something about the excessive weight we’ve accumulated over the years. We’ve looked at our reflection in the mirror, and the doctor told us to do something about it.

      As I stand in front of the mirror, I avoid peering into my eyes, too frightened to say to myself, As of tomorrow, I won’t do this or that anymore… instead, I will do this or that. Instead, I look away, thinking these resolutions are bound to fail because I don’t have enough willpower… if only I had more self-control and discipline, I would be able to achieve what I set out to do…

      The quest for willpower seems as impossible as the quest for the Holy Grail. We want to have it ready at our disposal so that it never lets us down, but this magic wand that promises to keep us on the right track seems to remain out of our reach. We want to have strength of mind and determination when we’re about to fall under the spell of temptation. We want a foolproof method that will keep us on the right track, a kind of instant formula for success. We have tried a lot of different ways to control ourselves; we’ve devised various strategies, without lasting results. We ask ourselves, Why can’t I stick to this diet or exercise program? Why can’t I give up smoking? Why can’t I study more? Why can’t I control my temper? Then we say, If only I had more willpower, all these things I want so badly for myself would come easy for me. We wonder where we can find the key to this elusive power that can make us do anything to achieve our goal.

      So many times we’ve tried to follow a plan to improve our lifestyle, our personality, or our career, only to give up after a while because we found it too difficult to stick with it. Too many obstacles seem to arise: stress at work or home causes the urge to give in to a craving of chocolate or nicotine. We believe that without fat and sugar or cigarettes in our daily life we will go crazy. Even though we wish to be healthy, we can’t imagine a life without these props that are essential to us and assist us in getting through our days. In a way, addictions are adaptive behaviours, as they help us cope with daily stresses, especially in the beginning, when the habit sets in. But in the long run they are detrimental, so we need to replace them with healthier coping strategies.

      I know that to be successful I need to strengthen my willpower and self-control, but I don’t know how, and I am scared it might be too difficult. I don’t believe I am capable of it. Haven’t I tried numerous times to control impulses such as overeating or drinking too much alcohol, or to force myself to perform certain actions like learning or exercising, only to realize after a short period of time that I can’t do it on a regular basis? I make excuses like, I’m too tired or I’ll do it when I’m ready or I’ll wait till the children are a bit older or I’ll have to go through with my divorce first… now is not the time. But when will be the time? Will life ever run so smoothly that it will allow me the peace to quit smoking, change my diet, or study without ever being stressed and having a slip? Life is unpredictable, and we need to accept this if we want to persevere.

      We wait for willpower to show up when life runs smoothly, when our relationships are good and our job is satisfying, when our kids are reasonable and our spouse supportive. But instead of waiting for a time that might never come, why not start right now? Why not focus on what we want and begin working towards our goal and make our dream come true?

      Most of us have some idea of what we want to achieve: it may be a slim body, a successful career, or the freedom from stress or harmful addictions. We want to be more positive, more optimistic, and believe in ourselves. But instead of harnessing our thoughts, we let them run wild, like savage horses galloping in every direction. We are constantly pulled apart and spend more time fighting with ourselves than enjoying this incredible journey that is our life. How can we have the serenity and steadfastness to continue in spite of all the obstacles we encounter?

      Some people seem to be naturally stubborn and strong-willed, while others seem weak and submissive. They are shy, diffident, easy to dominate and manipulate, easily influenced by their peers—into laziness or drug-taking, for instance. But one day, something happens and these people change. They get their lives together and become achievers.

      On her mother’s suggestion, an overweight teenager reluctantly and grudgingly took up tennis. To her own surprise, she found she had a talent for it and began training intensely every day after school. She is now slim and athletic and a national champion. The boys who used to tease her and call her fat are now begging her for dates (which she refuses with a certain inner satisfaction). An ex-smoker becomes a jogging fanatic. A former alcoholic and wife-beater is now a charismatic preacher who performs hands-on healings. A single mum living in semi-poverty turns into a successful entrepreneur. We all know similar stories, but we say, This only happens to others, not me.

      But we can make it happen with the right tools and strategies. Willpower is within ourselves, and all we need to do is unlock it to unleash this power we were born with. It will have a magical effect on our lives once we begin using it.

      Chapter 1

      What Is Willpower?

      Willpower is inner strength. It comes from our mind and is not imposed on us by the outside world. No one can give it to you, as you already have it within yourself. Willpower is an inner engine that propels us into action. Willpower is energy; it’s the drive that sustains our efforts and stops us from giving up. It’s a process that gives us the ability to make decisions and the impulse needed to carry them out. Willpower is comparable to a magic power because it helps us reach any goal that is important to us. It helps us create a new reality and perform miracles, big and small. It helps us take initiative and then actually put it into practice. It helps us become the person we really want to be.

      Willpower can be dormant for a long time before we allow it to become effective—when we’ve finally decided to unleash it. Allowing our willpower to spring forth is an art that can be learnt—and the more we practice, the more we’ll excel. Willpower helps us endure situations that are not always pleasant or comfortable but ones where we can later reap the rewards (for instance, adhering to an exercise routine or giving up cigarettes or junk

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