Getting Smart About Death
By Jane Filetic
()
About this ebook
the four things needed immediately after a death occurs;
ten helpful suggestions to consider when a death is imminent;
answers to frequently asked questions following a death;
the times in life when it is essential to express our own final wishes.
Getting Smart about Death is a simple, straightforward guide that will help you be prepared when a parent, spouse, partner, sibling, child, or best friend is nearing the end of life or has reached the end of life. Information is not just power; in the case of death, it is peace of mind.
Jane Filetic
Jane Filetic began a challenging second career in 2004 as an arrangement counselor in Monterey County, California. She helped families and individuals from every walk of life make burial and cremation arrangements, at death and in advance of death.
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Getting Smart About Death - Jane Filetic
Copyright © 2013 Jane Filetic.
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the publisher except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.
This guide is not intended to provide medical, health, financial, or legal advice. Consult with your own personal advisers about the specifics of your situation.
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ISBN: 978-1-4917-0087-7 (sc)
ISBN: 978-1-4917-0088-4 (hc)
ISBN: 978-1-4917-0089-1 (e)
Library of Congress Control Number: 2013913378
iUniverse rev. date: 8/28/2013
Contents
Introduction
Chapter 1 Four Things Needed Immediately after a Death Occurs
Chapter 2 How Do I Choose a Mortuary, Funeral Home, or Cremation Service to Handle a Death?
Chapter 3 Cemeteries, Obituaries, and Other Costs to Be Aware of after a Death Occurs
Chapter 4 Twelve Frequently Asked Questions Survivors Have after a Death
Chapter 5 Ten Helpful Suggestions to Consider When Death Is Imminent
Chapter 6 Does Someone Know Your Final Wishes for Burial or Cremation?
Chapter 7 Frequently Used Terms You’ll Hear When Arrangements Are Made or Preplanned
Chapter 8 Resources That May Help before a Death, after a Death, or While Preplanning
Introduction
A death occurs in this country about every twelve seconds, according to the US Census Bureau. It’s one of a handful of events that forces everything else to come to a standstill until it is handled. A death is not an on-demand
task that can be easily processed. It can destabilize even the most sturdy and highly functioning people we know.
Until I began working in a mortuary, I had no idea how unprepared most people were when a death occurred, even when it had been expected for a long time. If end-of-life planning had been done, often it fell short in addressing specific wishes for burial or cremation and who would oversee those wishes.
As a result, those who thought they would be in charge of making arrangements after a death were often not legally able to do so. Those who could sometimes were unwilling or even estranged from the family. Others who would step up were unaware of the amount of information that was needed immediately and the order in which things had to flow. Family members and friends often were at odds over the decisions that had to be made in fairly short order. And, sadly, some were at a loss just knowing if their loved one would want cremation or burial and how payment for either would be made.
Experiencing the death of a loved one is difficult enough. Not knowing what is needed immediately after a death and what has to happen before cremation or burial can take place only adds to the difficulty and distress. I created this guide for everyone who has just experienced a death, who is expecting a death, or who wants to preplan for themselves or for someone close to them. I am mindful of the weight associated with the subject of death. I’ve worked hard to keep the information in this guide plain, and not painful, for readers who are looking for basic guidance to get to where they need to be with peace of mind.
In the early chapters, you’ll learn the four things that are needed immediately after a death occurs. I’ll let you know who can legally make arrangement decisions and what the most important decisions are. You’ll also gain an understanding of the differences between funeral homes, mortuaries, and cremation services and how to choose one that best fits your situation. Information on whole body donation is also provided for readers considering it as an alternative to burial or cremation.
In later chapters, you’ll get answers to twelve of the most frequently asked questions that survivors have following a death. Also offered are ten helpful suggestions to consider immediately if the death of a loved one is imminent. Chapter 6 asks the question, "Does someone know your final wishes for burial or cremation?" This chapter will