You Can't Drop out of High School and Drop into a Job: Avoiding the Ocean of Economic and Social Instability

YOU CAN’T DROP OUT OF HIGH SCHOOL AND DROP INTO A JOB

Avoiding the Ocean of Economic and Social Instability

H. David Hairston-Ridgley, Jr

AuthorHouse™

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© 2011 H. David Hairston-Ridgley, Jr. All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

First published by AuthorHouse 3/11/2011

ISBN: 978-1-4520-1320-6 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-4520-1321-3 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2010914965

Printed in the United States of America

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any Web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

Cover conceptualization: Harold David Hairston

Cover Layout Design: Jah Prince

Consulting Publisher: Ohara Printing

Editor in Chief: Travis Winkey

Executive Editor: Nancy Ware

Contents

Preface

Dedication

A Message from President Obama

A Letter From Your Author

Why the Government Mandates and Pays for Your Public High School Education

You are More Than Somebody: You’re A Diamond in The Rough

The High School Puzzle and How You Fit into It

Never Having to Say, If Only I Had Known:

Should You Stay or Should You Drop?

America’s Shrinking Workforce

Bridging the Gap Between High School and Financial Stability

Learning to Lead from Within

Learning to M.O.D.E.L Life

Find Something You Love to Do And Make it Your Avocation

Avoiding Violence and Dealing with Sexual Temptation in High School Dating

Bridging the Gap Between Senior and Junior: A Message from Your Elders

Letters to you from your Village: Because, it takes a village to raise a child"

Starting the School Year on The Right Footing

Saying No to the So-Called Social-Drugs:

Bullying: Copping With and Protecting Yourself Against It

And The Rap Goes On

Appendixes

• Scholarships and Financial Aide Opportunities

• On Line and Other Non Traditional High School Diploma Programs

General Bibliography

Contributors:

I and the Young American Entrepreneur-Idol Foundation thank all of the contributors to this, YOU CAN’T DROP OUT OF HIGH SCHOOL AND DROP INTO A JOB. Special thanks goes out to the fourth graders at Bethune Elementary School who wrote such heart felt letters to teens pleading with them to stay in school and get a diploma.

Harold David Hairston, seved as a Junior Professor in the Department of Education and Psyhology at Morgan University in Baltimore Maryland. In the 70’s he lead theYouth Services and Advocacy Systems for the Baltimore City metropolitan area. He is a certified Organizational Development Trainer, Diagnostic Prescriptive Specialist, Youth advocate and mentor, family counselor, youth motivational speaker, real estate broker and social entrepreneur. Today he sits as the chairman and CEO of the Young American Entrepreneur - Idol foundation which he founded in 2007. David has been featured on radio and tv talk shows and at high shools, churches and a host of urban community venues and events. In addition to having written for several magazines and oter publications, David recently wrote a chapter (The Brown Paper Bag Test) in Volume 2 of the popular book, and soon to be movie, Saving Our Daughters. In Saving Our Daughters David is featured aside 24 public figures and celebrities from Tyler Perry Studios, broadway and hollywood. David who meets teens as Daddy David is committed to mentoring and doing what ever else it takes to help reduce the universal social trauma of 7,200 teens who drop out of school every school day.

Preface

Teens: I wrote this book especially for you. But I also hope your parent(s) and mentor(s) will read it. This book not only encourages you to stay in school and earn a high school diploma; it tells you why the government makes you attend school and why it is so vitally important for you to graduate.

High school is a dynamic experience. It’s about much more than mastering the 3R’s (READING, wRITING & aRITHMETIC). High school is about training and preparing you to claim your Right of Passage. High school is about learning and practicing the skills you will need to (1) enter the adult world, (2) compete against similarly educated peers to land a job or get into college, (3) find rewarding social status and (4) insure financial stability for your self and the family that most of you will end up building.

Because high school is such a dynamic experience, this book, YOU CAN’T DROP OUT OF HIGH SCHOOL AND DROP INTO A JOB, covers a great deal more than high school and getting a job. You can’t do well in high school, if you don’t know why you’re there, or you’re depressed, or you have psychological and or health issues, or you’re homeless, or you’re fighting being pulled into a gang, or you’re being bullied, or you’re withdrawn because you have no athletic or entertainment ability, or you feel academically challenged, or you feel you have no self worth, or you’re embarrassed because you’re smart, or you got pregnant, or you can’t see the relationship between school and what you consider to be the real world or you’re high off of drugs and or alcohol. Hence, this book addresses those issues and more.

Each chapter is written to pump you up and empower you to want to discover the extraordinary diamond in the rough buried within you so that you can envision the ultimate precious gem stone that you can become.

Though many tried to get me to water-down the language to grade school level, using smaller and simpler words and sentences, I decided to give you more credit than that. Hence, this book is written at the level I would expect a high school student to read. If you find it too difficult, get a dictionary; that’s what they are made for.

I want you to strive to be better. There are standards in life. To find success you must meet at least the minimum social and academic standards. You must read well enough to understand basic laws, compute well enough to pay your taxes and manage your finances and write well enough to complete a job application. You must seek information. Information will set you free.

High school is designed to prepare you to meet basic academic and social standards so that you will be able to operate and succeed in the real world. The real world does not reduce its standards. And, it makes no adjustments for any incompetence(s) or short falls you might have. A pitcher does not throw you a slower ball because he knows you can’t hit a fast one.

The primary goal of this book is to get you to make the conscious decision to hang in there and graduate from high school. Going further; it gives you practical lifestyle information about self esteem, dating, sexual temptation, abuse, government, finances, avoiding social drugs and substance abuse, bullying and more. It also gives you specific guidance and tips that you can use to understand why it’s so important that you decide to stay in high school, do better than your best and earn your diploma. High school is your training laboratory for dealing with and winning at the game of life. Success in life requires seeking, recognizing and grabbing opportunity, having a plan of action, stick-to-itiveness, goal direction, a passion to measure up and a determination to win.

Envision, if you can, the first time William Shakespeare took pen to paper or Albert Einstein discovered the wonderment of physical science or Michael Jordan tossed his first ball into a basket ball hoop or Aliesha Allen, Abigail Breslin and Ice Cube discovered the exhilaration of acting or Tiger Woods picked up a golf club or Bill Gates pondered the possibilities of cybernetics (science and study of communication in electronic systems) or Oprah Winfrey discovered the phenomenal possibilities and new applications of the TV Interview and camera to interviewing or Donald Trump saw the potential personal wealth in real estate.

In high school, some of them were geeks; some were introverts (loners) and some were extroverts (very outgoing) and many of them faced social and academic obstacles. But, all of them stuck it out, had a dream, chased their dreams and, as such, have made extraordinarily significant and everlasting impacts on world society. Each started out as an ordinary person who ended up doing extraordinary things.

You are no different. They had a dream, saw the relationship of education to acquiring that dream, studied hard, and pursued success with everything they had.

The great philosopher Francis Bacon said, and I paraphrase, ‘we begin life as though we are an empty slate (chalk board) upon which we write our present and future.’

The ideal time to determine what should be your priorities in life and map out the best path-way forward is during your teen years. It’s never good enough to struggle on and blame what you perceive to be your short comings on life circumstances over which you had no control. It’s crucial to realize that the path to social empowerment, financial security, happiness, and ultimate fulfillment begins with discovering and embracing who you are. If you can seek out, capture and plot your future on this realization, you will find yourself accomplishing what many others can only begin to hope for. Nothing in your life circumstance will ever change until you find your power and take control of your own life. Examine your life circumstance, face the negatives, make a plan to overcome them and then work your plan. Don’t allow somebody else to create your slate in life. Stand tall; dream big; reach for the stars; and write your own slate. All you have to lose is whatever stands in your way.In other words, stuff happens, bad things do happen to good people and life, (which can get complicated) comes at us awfully fast. But, you’re a human being. And, different from non-humans, (dogs, cows, etc.), your large heavy brain and freedom of will power, gives you the capacity to think. And, that thinking power empowers you to overcome, to change, to bounce back, to turn things around and to win at the game of life.

Most great contributors to society discovered their special talents when they were very young. They embraced their dreams whole heartedly, made plans to develop those dreams and then pushed on to make them realities.

Like John Linen and the other extraordinary personalities I’ve referred to above, you can fill in your slate of life yourself— one second, one minute, one hour, one day, one week, one month, one year and one decade at a time.

Like the great philosopher, Francis Bacon, I believe that we all come into the world the same way: an empty slate, shocked, naked and alone. And, as quiet as it’s kept, we’ll all leave this life in the same form and fashion: shocked to death, naked of life’s collected stuff and alone. But, once here, we will all experience peaks and valleys. It’s how you perceive and manage those peaks and valleys that will determine the caliber of human being, citizen and provider you will become. However, in between the coming and the going, you young people have the possibility and capability to do great things and affect the world in extraordinary ways. All you need do is (1) envision your dream being true, (2) avoid and run from procrastination and (3) begin doing the things you need to do to get to where you want to go. Success in life is all about having vision, planning, beginning and starting.

If you, personally, have never known an individual who has acquired incredible fame and success, you may find yourself looking hard at the early photos of accomplished Americans like President Obama, Michael Jordan, Muhammad Ali, Tiger Woods, Donald Trump, Denzel Washington, Judge Judy, Michael Jackson and Oprah Winfrey. You may even find yourself looking harder to see if you can somehow discern something of the ins and outs of how they achieved such greatness.

All great accomplishments begin somewhere. Yours begins with a high school diploma. There are lots of lost fights, missed shots, and failed songs. The important idea for you to internalize is that there was always a beginning!

You must seek out and give yourself the options and opportunities to make the necessary beginnings and starts in life. Some may be false starts; you may even lose interest in an endeavor. But, the next start may be the beginning of greatness and or total self fulfillment— like the teen entrepreneurs you will meet later on in this book. Never be afraid to make a start. And above all, don’t be influenced by or succumb to the "SNIOP" (susceptible to the negative influences of other people) mentality.

I believe that all of you have visions of your lives which embrace your dreams and give you the picture and possibility of fulfillment. Stay focused. Don’t let others dicker (mess with) with you life. Perhaps you aspire to be the scientist who develops a cure for HIV. If you listen to people who tell you that that’s too lofty a goal, or tell you that you will never be anything in life, you will not dream. On the other hand, if you succumb to influential peoples’ exhortations (urge somebody strongly) to become a lawyer instead of what you truly want to be, you are bound to become resentful and fall short of your duties. Hence, you will have cheated yourself of your dream. Never, ever allow your friends, peers and significant others to attack the scope and magnitude of your vision. When you let others dicker with your vision, the distorted result can cease to inspire and motivate you.

It is said that approximately 94% of the people in the world are SNIOPs." That’s why only approximately 6% of the people in the world are rich, famous, well off, happy or inspired. Be your own man or woman. Don’t let the crabs in the barrel pull you back into the darkness the moment you find light. Always remember, misery loves company.

I challenge you to, on this day, commit to take at least one concrete step to begin to reach a dream that you’ve been contemplating, but perhaps hiding. Write a letter; make a call; find and talk to a mentor and or look up an article for the purpose of pointing yourself towards the accomplishment of an important goal.

In fact, go even further. Get a blank piece if paper. Type or write your name at the top. Examine how your name looks on all of that empty white space. Now, lead from within, develop a plan, maximize the opportunity; discipline yourself to take advantage of your government funded public education; dream big, make and initiate a plan; keep your eye on the prize and begin to structure a successful and financially stable future.

Dedication

This book is dedicated to my son Dana, his family, especially my grand children Ariel, Brikitta and Peirce, and, 11 year old Jabari Jerome, who was spirited away so traumatically from my life, and whom I lovingly call JJ, because his love of life, natural capacity to live in the moment, curiosity, intelligence, energy, innocence and loyalty inspired me to want to be a better man. Until God allows us to meet again, I love and miss you JJ.

A Message from President Obama

Before sharing the President’s message, let me share this with you.

On this day, March 1, 2010, President Obama committed $900,000,000 to creating better systems and services to help urban teens, like many of you may be, stay in high school, get a high quality education and earn a diploma.

In several of the largest school systems across the country — from Baltimore to Cleveland to Atlanta to Oakland, Calif. – up to 50% or more of you are dropping out. And, the problem is not only in the big cities. A recent study by the Department of Education found that 31% of America’s students were dropping out or failing to graduate in the nation’s largest 100 public school districts.

The implications from dropping out of high school are huge. They include a higher risk of poverty and a shortened life span.

So why do so many of you drop? Eli Thomasson, 16, of Georgia, explains why he wanted to drop out of school earlier this year: I was just tired of school, you know. I didn’t like it. I had made my mind up that I wasn’t going to school anymore, Thomasson said.

His mother, Donna Thomasson, was frantic.

Terrified, she said. I thought his life was over. I didn’t really see how I could force him to go, because you can’t force them to learn, if they don’t want to.

And, Eli Thomasson wasn’t the only student at his high school to consider walking away from a diploma.

Berrien High in southern Georgia is part of a national epidemic. More than 40 percent of students there do not graduate.

Sheila Hendley, Berrien High’s graduation coach, has the challenging job of trying to stop this epidemic.

I have sat with students and literally begged, ‘Please don’t do this,’ Hendley said. I don’t want you to have to suffer like I know you will, if you don’t finish school.

And in the case of Eli Thomasson, it worked. She stayed on his case and persuaded him to stay in school.

He said, ‘You know, mom. She probably just saved my life, Donna Thomasson said.

Over 29,000 teens dropped out of urban Atlanta’s high schools in 2008.

In 2007, an incredible 1,474,729 of you dropped out of high school. In 2009, the Dailey Beast reported that, on average, 7,200 students drop out of high schools every school day.

It’s like seeing a child, who can’t swim in the middle of the lake; you watch the child bobbing up and down and can do nothing to help. Witnessing these teens drop out of school is like watching them drown, shares Sheila Hendley.

If you’re a teen who is thinking about dropping out of high school, please don’t.

I’m joining the President in throwing you a life-line.

America wants you to succeed in life. That’s why the president of the US reached out to you on September 8, 2009.

If you didn’t hear his speech, or forgot a lot of what he said; here it is again. Read it. Treasure it. Learn from it. Give it your most serious thought and respond positively.

The President:

"Hello everyone – how’s everybody doing today? I’m here with students at Wakefield High School in Arlington, Virginia. And we’ve got students tuning in from all across America, kindergarten through twelfth grade. I’m glad you all could join us today.

I know that for many of you, today is the first day of school. And for those of you in kindergarten, or starting middle or high school, it’s your first day in a new school, so it’s understandable if you’re a little nervous. I imagine there are some seniors out there who are feeling pretty good right now, with just one more years to go. And no matter what grade you’re in, some of you are probably wishing it were still summer and you could’ve stayed in bed just a little longer this morning.

I know that feeling. When I was young, my family lived in Indonesia for a few years, and my mother didn’t have the money to send me where all the American kids went to school. So she decided to teach me extra lessons herself, Monday through Friday – at 4:30 in the morning.

Now I wasn’t too happy about getting up that early. A lot of times, I’d fall asleep right there at the kitchen table. But whenever I’d complain, my mother would just give me one of those looks and say, This is no picnic for me either, buster.

So I know some of you are still adjusting to being back at school. But I’m here today because I have something important to discuss with you. I’m here because I want to talk with you about your education and what’s expected of all of you in this new school year.

Now I’ve given a lot of speeches about education. And I’ve talked a lot about responsibility.

I’ve talked about your teachers’ responsibility for inspiring you, and pushing you to learn.

I’ve talked about your parents’ responsibility for making sure you stay on track, and get your homework done, and don’t spend every waking hour in front of the TV or with that Xbox.

I’ve talked a lot about your government’s responsibility for setting high standards, supporting teachers and principals, and turning around schools that aren’t working where students aren’t getting the opportunities they deserve.

But at the end