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    How to Raise a Real Man, Not a Pimp: Momma Ho and the Pimp Generation
    How to Raise a Real Man, Not a Pimp: Momma Ho and the Pimp Generation
    How to Raise a Real Man, Not a Pimp: Momma Ho and the Pimp Generation
    Ebook131 pages2 hours

    How to Raise a Real Man, Not a Pimp: Momma Ho and the Pimp Generation

    By George McNair

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    About this ebook

    This book is about our younger generation of men and their parents. We are not raising real men. Today men let their mother, or some other woman, take care of them instead of finding a way to stand on their own two feet. They are lazy, disrespectful, and unemployable. This book is about reversing the trend and raising responsible men instead of adult boys.
    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherBookBaby
    Release dateJan 20, 2017
    ISBN9781483592381
    How to Raise a Real Man, Not a Pimp: Momma Ho and the Pimp Generation

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      Book preview

      How to Raise a Real Man, Not a Pimp - George McNair

      Author

      INTRODUCTION

      We have a generation of pimps and the worst parents in history.

      —George McNair

      We’re not raising men. That’s a fact. Instead of raising men, we’re turning boys out. That’s what this book is about. If you find some of my terms offensive, I apologize, but I have to keep it real. I offer a different perspective, I think, because a man raised me, and men raised by men see things differently than others.

      My father raised me. God took my mother at an early age and placed me in the heart of my father. He was a real man and an old-school parent. The principles and parental tactics in this book are from that old-school upbringing.

      I was nine years old when my mother lost her battle with tuberculosis. It was a life-altering experience, a game changer that left invisible, long-lasting wounds. Her death had a great effect on my childhood but did not rob me of a precious one. If I could trade my childhood, I wouldn’t. It’s priceless. Life runs in cycles of good and bad times. My childhood prepared me for both.

      Like most people, I made some bad decisions in life and have had my share of personal setbacks. My childhood gave me the resilience and power to bounce back. That’s what this book is about—preparing your son for the challenges of life. I thank God every day for my childhood and the loved ones who prepared me for those challenges. I didn’t like some parenting tactics when I was growing up, but I understood and appreciated them later, which is why I thank God daily for the tough love I received.

      My boyhood is not why I’m writing this book. It’s the backbone, not the reason. The way I see it, real men have become an endangered species. And if we want to do something about it, we need real men to step up. For the real men reading this book, you know where I’m coming from. We have to step up to the plate. It does not have to be your son; just mentor at least one boy. This book is my contribution. It is my mentorship!

      1

      PIMP GENERATION

      "A dog wags its tail.

      The tail does not wag the dog."

      —Unknown

      Today, the pimp generation is a reality. Since most households have at least one member of it, this generation’s existence is undeniable. To understand the existence of a pimp generation, you must first define a pimp. What is a pimp? Most people think it’s a man who controls prostitutes and arranges clients for them or a fancy dresser with a flashy car and a stable of hos. This man is a professional pimp because he conducts his pimping like a business. He calls his manager a bottom ho who keeps his business flowing and profitable. He is not part of the pimp generation and did not play a role in creating it.

      There is another kind of pimp. He is a member of the pimp generation that bears the same outlook as the professional. It’s a case of same soup, different bowl. But when you think about this pimp, you have to view him from a player’s perspective because professionals use fear to hold and control, while the members of the pimp generation use love and emotion. It gives them a great advantage over the professional. Think about it. People will do more out of love than fear. They’ll run into a burning building and risk their lives for someone they love. They will not risk their lives for someone they fear.

      This type of pimp uses women for support and to supply a comfortable lifestyle the same way a professional pimp does. The occupation of their employees is the only difference between them. The professional has to keep his hos busy turning tricks to make him some money. The other pimp doesn’t because the women who love and support him have regular jobs with a steady paycheck. So he doesn’t have to keep them busy making him some money, but he has to keep them attached, confused, and emotionally involved to continue to receive support.

      These pimps have one concern: themselves. Since they rely on others for support, their love for others expires when the money runs out. They are selfish, lazy, and unemployable. I think these pimps are colder than the professionals because of their relationship with their women. It’s normal to see this pimp live off his mother or girlfriend. Their relationship is not important. I call this type a generic pimp because he’s homemade and homegrown.

      Another pimp usually introduces the professional to pimping. They call it turning out. Generic pimps are different in that sense because they are homeschooled. Their pimping education began at birth because their parents simply don’t get it. Boys are natural born players. Game to males is the same as intuition is to a female; they are born with it. I have a chapter on game and go into this in more detail there.

      Boys watch their parents for a living. It’s their job. That’s what they do. So they know how to play you or get you to play yourself. They know when they have to apply a little more charm and warmth and when they have to lash out, scream, and get abusive. It depends on the situation. How many times have you watched a toddler sulk, cry or have a tantrum because the parent said no? And then after the toddler whined and cried for a while, the parents gave in, saying, Okay, just this once, since it means so much to you. Just stop making such a fuss over it.

      That is normal parenting today because it’s all about pleasing the child. Most parents today do not want to see their sons experience anger and sadness. They want them to be happy all the time. Today, when a parent sees any sign of sadness or anger in a son, the parent immediately addresses it to protect him from it. They call it good parenting. I don’t.

      What are you protecting the boy from? Anger and sadness is a natural part of being human. Everybody feels anger and sadness to some degree. He cannot go through life without having his fair share of both. I believe good parenting is teaching children ways to deal with anger and sadness, not protecting them from it. Teaching your son to work with the anger or sadness will help him develop ways of dealing with it and give him some good data about himself. He needs to understand himself and others to take control of his life, and it will help him avoid some costly mistakes in the future.

      So when a parent gives in to their son to please him, he or she is doing more harm than good. That parent is not preparing him for his life journey. Instead, he or she is teaching the boy what works to get what he wants. He will use that information to break down the mechanics of parenting. In other words, he will use it against you, and experts will call his behavior manipulative. I don’t. I call it pimping.

      Pimping is the use of deception or trickery to get something the pimp wants. It is a master skill that boys use to control others to their own advantage, without caring about others’ interests. It’s a combination of negatives: manipulation, exploitation, deceit, and confusion. In the streets, people call it getting over on someone or playing him or her.

      For the professional pimp, it is a mind game. The generic pimp plays mind games too, but he incorporates them with love and emotion. His parents taught him how. His lessons began at birth. Most boys learn quickly, so they know how to pimp before mastering the art of potty training. In the example I mentioned earlier, the toddler knew what it would take to get what he wanted, and the parent reinforced it. The toddler got over. He played the parent. Period!

      Parents should not flip-flop, because sons are always watching to see if they mean what they say and do. That’s why it is so important to be consistent. When parents tell their boy something, it should be final. Parents should not change their decision and give in to their son. If they do, it becomes a lesson in pimping because it shows the boy what works to get what he wants. He’s emotionally invested in what he wants. He’s a child and does not know how to control his urges or to delay his satisfaction. He will use any tactics to get whatever he wants, including lying and exploiting your emotional vulnerability by telling you what you want to hear. When his focus is on getting what he wants, he becomes single minded, and everything and everybody else is a distant second.

      How many times have you heard of a boy sitting on the couch playing video games all day while his mother is at work? When she walks in the door, she’s tired from working a full shift. You can see it on her face. The boy sees it too, but he yells from the couch, Mom I’m hungry! When you gonna fix something to eat? This boy is not concerned about

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