Resolve Jealousy Workbook
By Kosjenka Muk
3/5
()
About this ebook
If you are jealous, you might have an exaggerated, idealized mental image of your partner. You might expect your partner to be “pure”, devoted, unconditionally loving and accepting ... in other words, to behave as a perfect parent. This is an indication of bonds created in childhood.
If you idolize your partner as a parent replacement, every deviation from your expectations might trigger fear, confusion and defensive anger. You might feel that your partner owes you undivided attention. You might feel dependent of your partner's love, focus and devotion, just like you felt dependent of your parents as a child. You might believe that you deeply love your partner and that a breakup would mean losing your sense of meaning of life.
The truth, however, may be that you do not love your partner as who they are. You are in love with the idealized image in your mind. Unintentionally, you are willing to sacrifice the personality, independence and self-esteem of your partner to that infantile image. The strength of your emotions might make you believe that you have the right to do so.
This program can help you understand the real causes of your jealousy, change your perspective and learn how to dissolve jealous urges. You can review your behavior and its consequences for your relationships and the quality of your life. Finally, these exercises will can guide you towards emotional independence and healthy self-esteem.
Kosjenka Muk
Kosjenka (pronounced Kos-yen-ka) Muk is a special education teacher and Integrative Systemic Coaching trainer from Croatia, EU. Her curiosity for and exploration of human psychology and potential started at age 15, and ever since she used every opportunity to expand her knowledge. Since 2003, she coaches individuals and couples, as well as teaching her workshops on topics of self-esteem, happy partnership, verbal self-defense and others. She also has wide experience working online with clients from over 20 countries worldwide. As a trainer of Integrative Systemic Coaching method, her teaching experience includes 8 European countries, as well as Canada, USA (Hawaii), and Mexico. While she loves to travel, she also enjoys living in nature and tries, with variable success, to grow all kinds of unusual plants in her garden and crack more or less spontaneous jokes. You can read many of her articles on http://iscmentoring.eu/km/articles/, or, if you enjoy thoughtful conversation, join Integrative Systemic Coaching Facebook group.
Read more from Kosjenka Muk
Resolve Anger Workbook Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Resolve Shame And Guilt Workbook Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Emotional Maturity In Everyday Life Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5How To Fall Out Of Love Workbook Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Resolve Fear Workbook Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Mature Parenting Workbook Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5
Related to Resolve Jealousy Workbook
Related ebooks
Mature Parenting Workbook Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5How to Dissolve Childhood Pain: A Simple Guide to Understanding Childhood Conditioning and Releasing Negative Beliefs Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Anger Workbook Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Relationship Skills Workbook: A Do-It-Yourself Guide to a Thriving Relationship Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Healing for Damaged Emotions Workbook Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5The Anger Workbook: An Interactive Guide to Anger Management Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Worry Workbook: Twelve Steps to Anxiety-Free Living Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5The Emotional Freedom Workbook: Take Control of Your Life And Experience Emotional Strength Rating: 1 out of 5 stars1/5Reclaim Your Relationship: A Workbook of Exercises and Techniques to Help You Reconnect with Your Partner Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsSurvive or Thrive? Workbook: Step by Step Workbook to Help You Solve Life Problems and Thrive Again Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsHot Confidence Workbook Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsHeal Your Life Workbook: Resources and Tools for Clearing Emotional Baggage so You Can Love Your Life Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5The Perfect Relationship Anxiety Workbook for Married Couples Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Breakup Recovery Workbook: Daily Writing Exercises for Surviving (And Eventually Thriving) Through the End of a Relationship Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsRecovery from Co-Dependency: It's Never Too Late to Reclaim Your Childhood Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsGifts From The Child Within: A Recovery Workbook Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsA Gift to Myself: A Personal Workbook and Guide to "Healing the Child Within" Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5The Pathways to Peace Anger Management Workbook Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsStress Management Workbook Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Inner Child Discovery Journey Workbook Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5How to Love Your Life: Workbook Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Self-Sabotage Behavior Workbook Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Real Relationships Workbook: From Bad to Better and Good to Great Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Self-Love Workbook: How To Reprogram Your Body To Find Yourself And What You Want In Life Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5The Self-Esteem Workbook The multiple forms of self-esteem and the evaluation of one's value Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Perfect Relationship Workbook: How to Eliminate Jealousy, Attachment and Overcome Anxiety and Insecurity in Your Relationships Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsGrowing Couple Intimacy: Improving Love, Sex, and Relationships Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratings
Relationships For You
How to Talk so Little Kids Will Listen: A Survival Guide to Life with Children Ages 2-7 Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5All About Love: New Visions Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5She Comes First: The Thinking Man's Guide to Pleasuring a Woman Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Dumbing Us Down - 25th Anniversary Edition: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Big Book of 30-Day Challenges: 60 Habit-Forming Programs to Live an Infinitely Better Life Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5A Child Called It: One Child's Courage to Survive Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5I'm Glad My Mom Died Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Boundaries with Kids: How Healthy Choices Grow Healthy Children Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex: Creating a Marriage That's Both Holy and Hot Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Boundaries Workbook: When to Say Yes, How to Say No to Take Control of Your Life Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Running on Empty: Overcome Your Childhood Emotional Neglect Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5ADHD: A Hunter in a Farmer's World Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Maybe You Should Talk to Someone: A Therapist, HER Therapist, and Our Lives Revealed Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Covert Passive Aggressive Narcissist: The Narcissism Series, #1 Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Your Brain's Not Broken: Strategies for Navigating Your Emotions and Life with ADHD Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5The Art of Loving Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The ADHD Effect on Marriage: Understand and Rebuild Your Relationship in Six Steps Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Becoming Sister Wives: The Story of an Unconventional Marriage Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5The Like Switch: An Ex-FBI Agent's Guide to Influencing, Attracting, and Winning People Over Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Codependence and the Power of Detachment: How to Set Boundaries and Make Your Life Your Own Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Becoming Free Indeed: My Story of Disentangling Faith from Fear Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Maybe You Should Talk to Someone: the heartfelt, funny memoir by a New York Times bestselling therapist Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5My Grandmother's Hands: Racialized Trauma and the Pathway to Mending Our Hearts and Bodies Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5
Reviews for Resolve Jealousy Workbook
2 ratings0 reviews
Book preview
Resolve Jealousy Workbook - Kosjenka Muk
Introduction
In my first book, "Emotional Maturity In Everyday Life, I have written about jealousy as the most childish emotion of all. In this context,
childish" is not meant to be offensive. It is simply a factual statement, used to indicate emotions that originate in one's childhood and persist throughout adult life. This might not sound encouraging. However, childish emotions can be changed.
This program can help you understand the real causes of your jealousy, change your perspective and learn how to dissolve jealous urges. You can review your behavior and its consequences for your relationships and the quality of your life. Finally, these exercises will guide you towards emotional independence and healthy self-esteem.
To achieve an optimal success with this program, it is crucial to repeat the exercises regularly. Our subconscious minds contain emotional and mental habits that were enforced for decades, and are often based on early childhood experiences and interpretations. Such deeply ingrained habits are not likely to change if you only exercise occasionally. Therefore I recommend that you apply this program regularly through a longer period of time.
Biological background of jealousy
When we were babies and toddlers, our brains had to work in full speed, learning how to survive in a very complex world. Our world is now less dangerous to our day-to-day survival than ever in history – but our biological heritage is not aware of this. Therefore, small children's brains observe the world around them intensely and carefully, learning how to survive, creating strong impressions and conclusions which can color their perspectives for the rest of their lives. Instinctively, they scan the surroundings for any sign of threat to their lives.
If a potential threat is perceived, a child's brain stops everything else and focuses on survival. Emotions become intense and urgent, driving the child to struggle to survive in any way possible.
Most other animal cubs are born on a higher level of physical maturity and are able to walk and take care of themselves much sooner than a human baby. A human baby must be born early, otherwise the size of its growing brain might kill both mother and child during birth. Therefore, human babies are much more dependent of their parents than most other animal cubs are of theirs. Our instincts reflect this.
Parents' love and attention enable a child's survival. Therefore, any sign of their lack might push a baby into a state of panic. If you have been around small babies, you have probably seen some of them cry desperately as soon as left alone. Anything