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    Mature Parenting Workbook
    Mature Parenting Workbook
    Mature Parenting Workbook
    Ebook67 pages1 hour

    Mature Parenting Workbook

    By Kosjenka Muk

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    About this ebook

    There are many books about communicating with children, taking care of them and exercising healthy discipline. This book is about something else – issues which influence your parenting unconsciously.

    The way you grew up has a huge influence on your parenting style and your emotional reactions to your children. Some people are aware that their emotions and behavior are not as healthy as they would like - but they don't know what else to do, or they find it very difficult to change their behavior. Why do some parents resent their children, or feel guilty about every imperfection, or feel attached to their children in unhealthy ways? This is a book about many such unconscious issues that often remain unrecognized - but have heavy consequences.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherKosjenka Muk
    Release dateMar 15, 2016
    ISBN9781311559869
    Mature Parenting Workbook
    Author

    Kosjenka Muk

    Kosjenka (pronounced Kos-yen-ka) Muk is a special education teacher and Integrative Systemic Coaching trainer from Croatia, EU. Her curiosity for and exploration of human psychology and potential started at age 15, and ever since she used every opportunity to expand her knowledge. Since 2003, she coaches individuals and couples, as well as teaching her workshops on topics of self-esteem, happy partnership, verbal self-defense and others. She also has wide experience working online with clients from over 20 countries worldwide. As a trainer of Integrative Systemic Coaching method, her teaching experience includes 8 European countries, as well as Canada, USA (Hawaii), and Mexico. While she loves to travel, she also enjoys living in nature and tries, with variable success, to grow all kinds of unusual plants in her garden and crack more or less spontaneous jokes. You can read many of her articles on http://iscmentoring.eu/km/articles/, or, if you enjoy thoughtful conversation, join Integrative Systemic Coaching Facebook group.

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      Book preview

      Mature Parenting Workbook - Kosjenka Muk

      Introduction

      There are many books about communicating with children, taking care of them and exercising healthy discipline. This book is about something else – issues which influence your parenting unconsciously.

      The way you grew up has a huge influence on your parenting style and your emotional reactions to your children. Some people are aware that their emotions and behavior are not as healthy as they would like - but they don't know what else to do, or they find it very difficult to change their behavior. Why do some parents resent their children, or feel guilty about every imperfection, or feel attached to their children in unhealthy ways? This is a book about many such unconscious issues that often remain unrecognized - but have heavy consequences.

      To achieve an optimal success with this program, it is crucial to repeat the exercises regularly. Our subconscious minds contain emotional and mental habits that were enforced for decades, and are often based on our own early childhood experiences and interpretations. Such deeply ingrained habits are not likely to change if you only exercise occasionally. Therefore I recommend that you apply this program regularly.

      Biology, society and consumerism

      Most people considering parenthood imagine that it will be all sunshine and flowers, with a side dish of specialness. Most people who have children know differently, but they will keep asking you What are you waiting for?, probably so that later they could tell you I told you so!, and See, now you know how I felt! If parenthood was such a bed of roses, we would be surrounded by many happy families, not the common miserable mess that creates work for therapists everywhere.

      Children are essential for humanity to survive. Nowadays, however, it appears that survival of humanity (and many other species) depends of how well can we control our biological urges for power, hoarding, social status, choosing aggressive leaders... and child-bearing. Many of Earth's resources are endangered, not just oil, forests and drinking water; if we want to avoid not just economical crises, but future world wars, we need to make our societies sustainable.

      Yet this is only the start of the story, the wider picture. On the individual level, there is so much to pay attention to when raising a child, so many little things that potential parents don't know or consider. Being a parent is an incredible experience that can be immensely rewarding, yet the number of challenges involved and lack of knowledge and preparedness too often result in chaotic, unhappy families.

      If child raising was easy, much fewer parents would be so tired and feel overloaded. Many parents can feel so resourceless at times, that in spite of all the rational knowledge they might have, they find themselves resorting to threats, yelling, blaming, and all the short-term solutions for which they resented their own parents. How many times did you hear (or say): I really don't know what to do with that child anymore!? That reflects not just lack of communication skills, but also a lack of preparedness.

      Capitalism and children

      Our society makes parenthood trickier than ever before. Isolated small families that deal with too many of their own issues to have time or motivation to help others, long working and commuting hours, selfish employers, limited finances, school systems that brainwash children instead of supporting their creativity and independence, mass media that promote toxic role-models and do everything they can to manipulate children into thoughtless consumerism... and these are only the external influences. Certainly, history wasn't all roses and butterflies either, but that fact doesn't diminish the problems of modern civilization.

      I've seen some internet discussions in which the majority of people expressed the opinion that young parents shouldn't

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