She Thought She Could She Did A Miraculous Journey of Healing
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She Thought She Could She Did A Miraculous Journey of Healing - Judy Marie Trimbur
awakening.
Chapter 1
The Voice
The degenerative bone condition that started in my childhood around the age of ten caused severe inflammation in my spine. This pain I experienced created a daily struggle, and with each passing year it became more and more intense. Physical conditions curtailed my participation in sports. Body ailments were affecting my ability to concentrate in school and to complete my homework, and it made sleeping impossible at times. The medication I took affected my body’s elimination process, making it nearly impossible to have a regular bowel movement.
Innumerable health conditions plagued me as a child; from urinary tract infections to chronic constipation, I could not find relief. Due to severe constipation, I only had a bowel movement two to four times a month. By the age of twelve, discomfort in my legs made it extremely difficult to walk. The only solution being offered by doctors was surgery on my L4 disc. I went through surgery hoping it would end the continual daily aching and soreness, but relief was short-lived. A few years later I was in the operating room again, this time to have surgery on the L5 disc and to remove fragments from the first surgery. After the first surgery the doctors had been hopeful they had resolved my problems. However, after the second surgery, they were not as positive. The doctor indicated I could anticipate more surgeries as I got older if I didn’t take care
of myself. His warning to take care of myself sounded Greek to me. I grew up in an environment where basic susrvival needs were the priority. It was the ‘suck it up sally’ mentality. An alcoholic home environment didn’t warrant the concept of self-care. I felt like a defective human being, one that somehow God hadn’t built right, a humpty dumpty
that had fallen off the wall, and couldn’t be put back together again.
As a teenager I developed rheumatoid arthritis and sciatica, which accompanied the degenerative bone condition I had. I was hospitalized for Mononucleosis and a rheumatic fever shortly after my first back surgery. All of these conditions engulfed my world. I became dependent on muscle relaxants and anti-inflammatory drugs that compounded my constipation, and set up a vicious cycle. The constipation put pressure on my back and increased my need for more medication.
As the years went on, my health continued to deteriorate and the amount of daily physical pain was intensified. From my teenage years through my twenties I felt like I was caught in a revolving door of physical therapy. I also suffered from Epstein-Barr (a debilitating condition involving the nervous system, that robs a person of their energy) diverticulitis, and gestational type 2 diabetes. Between the pain and the visits to various doctors with contradicting prognoses, my life for the future felt hopeless. Most doctors concluded that I would be in a wheelchair by the age of thirty. My life was physically, mentally, and emotionally fragmented. However, my life would take a 180 degree turn in my late twenties: Pandora’s box was about to spring open.
The year was 1985. I had given birth to my third child seven months prior to hearing The Voice. By this time, my lower back and leg pain had progressed. The only way for me to get out of bed and move up and down without muscle spasms was by wearing a back brace. At the age of 28, a mother of three young children, one still an infant, I found myself in the office of an orthopedic surgeon, yet again. After reviewing the tests with me he recommended surgery and explained the pros and cons. Even though I felt an intense tightening in my gut, surgery seemed like the logical decision. I thought there were no other options. I was sitting in the doctor’s office staring at the permission form for yet another back surgery, when I first heard The Voice. It was unmistakable when The Voice spoke, saying, Judy, no more!
and felt undeniable, magnetically vibrating every cell of my being. A strong sprinkling of Angelic dust came over me. Divine vapors stirred higher faculties within me that previously had been dormant. I was plugged into an awareness of ultimate reality. My spine immediately went erect in the chair as an illuminating, clear white light permeated all through me. The color of this iridescent energy was a bright white yet I could see through it. My ‘mind chatter’ was completely shut off. A powerful, loving and direct communication from God, from the Divine, from all that is consciousness engulfed my being.
Although I had felt spiritually connected since my childhood, I never heard The Voice speak to me. Suspiciously looking around to make sure the doctor and I were the only two people in the room, it was evident there were no other physical bodies.
Instantly, an overwhelming warmth, love, and peace flooded my consciousness. My entire essence was transformed by this ever-flowing magnificent Divine presence. A tingly sensation pulsated throughout my body that affected my hearing and eyesight. My hearing momentarily became disengaged from any earthly tones as if everything was in extreme slow motion. I remember watching the doctor’s lips move as he was speaking yet his words were soundless. What I did hear was nothing.
I only sensed a deep vibration of peace. Next, I automatically removed my glasses because they seemed too strong for my eyes. I realized my eyesight was temporarily restored to perfect vision. The Voice was guiding me away from one place and towards something better. My life’s compass changed direction at that moment, and I knew anything was possible. The Voice of Divine Truth and Guidance was unlocked inside me. That day a cosmic ocean of consciousness united waves of Knowing, via ‘The Voice.’ My life cord became plugged into the Universal socket of Knowing, and was there to stay.
My hands trembled and fingers went limp as the pen fell to the floor. I felt all the color fade from my face. The sensation of a fiery blaze overtook me from the tip of my head to the end of my toes as I broke out in a ferocious sweat. I gazed into the eyes of the surgeon and calmly said, I can’t do it.
What?
He almost gasped.
I can’t go through with the surgery.
Are you crazy?!
This was both a question and a declaration; he really did not believe that I had a choice.
Yes, I guess I am.
Up to this moment, my life had felt insane, so what was a little more craziness? Although this was the best craziness I had ever felt. This wasn’t embarrassing to me, nor did I feel shy about it—I felt completely empowered by The Voice.
As I was driving home, I knew my car was in motion yet I was completely unaware of everything around me. My hearing was still altered and amplified with positive energy. Nothing negative could vibrate in me as if I were in a safe bubble of love and light. I had no worries, no concerns, no anger, resentments, or anxiety—only total peace and love. An overwhelming, peaceful realization swept through me; I was done with surgeries and pain medications forever. To my surprise, I effortlessly stopped taking medications cold turkey. This may not be appropriate in all situations, however in my own, the transition was utterly natural.
There was a new awareness of energy moving through my body, instilling me with hope, help, and healing. My spirit was being steered in an unknown direction yet I completely trusted the force behind it. My world had been jolted for the better, I felt born for the first time. My life as I knew it took a sudden turn where my north became south and my south became north. I had been rerouted in a new direction where my mantra became let go and let God
. Finally, after all the years of living in hell on earth, I had hope of living in heaven on