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    iCope: Stress Management for Teens and Young Adults
    iCope: Stress Management for Teens and Young Adults
    iCope: Stress Management for Teens and Young Adults
    Ebook159 pages1 hour

    iCope: Stress Management for Teens and Young Adults

    By Anthony R. Ciminero, Ph. D.

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    About this ebook

    iCope presents an efficient yet comprehensive approach for teens and young adults who want to learn better coping skills to manage stress. The methods described are all based on scientific principles that have been researched over the past 40 years. This book clearly describes what to do on a day-to-day basis to manage stress effectively. This edition has also expanded coverage on more complex topics for teens such as anger management, trauma, and self-esteem. The book teaches:

    The four basic skills used to manage stress;
    How to gauge stress more accurately and find your effective stress zone;
    Methods to relax physically and mentally;
    Cognitive restructuring techniques as a psychological defense against stress;
    How to use problem solving skills to deal with certain stressful situations;
    10 steps to prevent the negative impact of stress on your life;
    8 key recommendations for anger management;
    Key strategies to improve self-esteem;
    How to cope with major life events or trauma.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherAnthony R. Ciminero, Ph. D.
    Release dateApr 29, 2012
    ISBN9781476066899
    iCope: Stress Management for Teens and Young Adults
    Author

    Anthony R. Ciminero, Ph. D.

    Anthony R. Ciminero, Ph. D. is a clinical psychologist and corporate consultant with over 30 years of professional experience including faculty positions at major universities. He has published extensively including self-help books and textbooks in psychology. In addition to working with numerous individuals with various stress-related disorders, Dr. Ciminero has also conducted stress management programs for many large companies. His firm provides various professional services including post-traumatic stress debriefings worldwide.

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      Book preview

      iCope - Anthony R. Ciminero, Ph. D.

      STRESS MANAGEMENT

      FOR TEENS &YOUNG ADULTS

      (Second Edition)

      By

      Anthony R. Ciminero, Ph.D.

      Published by Anthony R. Ciminero, Ph. D. at Smashwords

      ZIGGY © ZIGGY AND FRIENDS, INC.  Reprinted with permission of

      UNIVERSAL UCLICK.  All rights reserved.

      Copyright 2012, 2014 by Anthony R. Ciminero, Ph. D., Miami, Florida.

      Smashwords Edition,

      License Notes

      This ebook is licensed for your personal use only. This ebook and all of its separate contents may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you are reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use, then please go to http://www.smashwords.com and purchase your own personal copy. Thank you for respecting the author’s hard work and protecting these rights of use.

      If you are an educator, counselor, or therapist, and you want to use portions of this book for your pupils or clients, please contact the author at 800-533-0020 for permission to use certain forms or limited sections of the book. Print versions of the iCope books in paperback form are available at all major book retailers.

      PREFACE

      Stress is a popular topic because it impacts all of us regardless of age. Extensive research has been conducted on the serious effects of stress on our health and well-being. Much of the research is highly technical and cumbersome to read, but still important to our understanding and coping with stress. In earlier versions of this book, I attempted to present the fundamental knowledge and skills needed to cope with stress on a day-to-day basis in order to help prevent the devastating and life-threatening risks associated with stress when left uncontrolled. I have again chosen to review in this book what is essential for a clear understanding of stress and how it affects us without going into extraneous details on the subject.

      I have focused on the four primary coping strategies rather than provide the reader with dozens of procedures. This book teaches an efficient approach that is relatively easy to learn. Once mastered, the procedures can be used within minutes to manage, but not eliminate, stress. As is true with any self-help book, there are certain limits to what this or any other approach can do for you. If you are having serious concerns or problems and the use of this book or other books does not result in significant improvement, it is recommended that you consult a professional.

      The first edition of one of my books, One Minute Stress Management, was published 25 years ago. I have kept the basic approach and concepts consistent in this book for teens and young adults since the fundamentals of stress management have not changed. However, I have added extra stress-related topics that have received considerable attention in recent years. Some of these topics relate to additional skills such as assertiveness, anger management, and organizational skills. Another topic added is how we can deal with major life events that can seriously challenge our ability to cope. There is also a brief section on self-esteem and confidence, which are important in our overall resilience in coping with stress, not only in teen years, but throughout a lifetime.

      This book is ideal for adolescents, college students, and young adults looking for self-help methods to cope with the high demands of stress during these years. It is designed for readers to use on their own or in combination with counseling or therapy. The approach will be particularly beneficial to those individuals who are coping with various situations such as parents going through a divorce, living in a blended family, relationship issues, moving to a new school, etc. Therapists and counselors who conduct programs for anger management, depression, anxiety, or addictive disorders for teens or young adults should also find this book helpful as an adjunct to their teaching and therapy materials.

      Two additional items can be used in conjunction with the book. A special version of a Stress Control Biofeedback Card™ that aids in learning one of the basic principles of this book is available on our website. Additional materials including audio relaxation methods that supplement the procedures in the book are also on this site. For these resources, go to: http://www.iCopeWithStress.com

      The cover for iCope was designed by our talented friend and colleague, Jaime Orozco from Miami, Florida. The photo shows Matthew Ciminero and Arlie Slonim enjoying the beautiful weather and having fun with friends on a recent group trip to Israel. This photo is symbolic of various concepts related to stress management. Coping is an active process where we can rise above the day-to-day issues that we face. Stress, like gravity, inevitably brings us back to our normal state. Also, social relationships are important in maintaining our resilience to the everyday impact of stress, and their joyous leap vividly demonstrates this principle.

      Many people have helped with various stages of this project over the past several years. I thank all of you for your assistance. Special thanks go to Jessi Ciminero, Matthew Ciminero, and others who made very helpful suggestions on the manuscript. Matthew was also particularly helpful in the final stages of the manuscript preparation. I would especially like to thank my wife, business partner, and colleague, Joanne Bauling, Ph. D., whose creative ideas, feedback, extensive input, and continued encouragement on this and prior manuscripts have contributed immensely to this final product. I thank all of you for your help.

      Anthony R. Ciminero, Ph. D.

      June 15, 2012

      TABLE OF CONTENTS

      Understanding Stress

      Ground Rules For Stress Management

      Basic Skill Number One: Self-Awareness

      Basic Skill Number Two: Relaxation Methods to Quiet The Body

      Basic Skill Number Three: Talking Rationally To Yourself

      Basic Skill Number Four: Problem Solving

      Improving Resilience To Stress

      Enhancing Success: Mindfulness and Positive Psychology

      Supplement A: The Millennial Challenge

      Supplement B: Time Management and Organizational Skills

      Supplement C: Building Self-Esteem and Confidence

      Supplement D: Assertiveness and Anger Management

      Supplement E: Coping With Major Life Events

      Summary of iCope Procedures

      References & Suggested Readings

      Back Cover Material

      About the Author

      *****

      CHAPTER 1:

      UNDERSTANDING STRESS

      Most of us have some idea of what stress is. This is not surprising since all of us experience stress in some fashion throughout our lives. If you try to define stress, you most likely would identify some of the key concepts related to it. Without any training, you will know something about stress and possibly how it affects you personally.

      Many teens and adults describe stress as feelings of tension, pressure, frustration, or anxiety. Others mention the physical components such as an upset stomach, tight muscles, increased heart rate, and perspiration. Still, others will describe stress as the things that cause our stress: The day-to-day events and problems at home, work, or school, as well as the unfortunate events in life such as the loss of a relationship, death of a loved one, physical injuries, parent’s divorce, moving to a new school, etc.

      All of these descriptions are correct to some degree in that they touch on some feature of stress. However, none of these descriptions is complete. Before we can get into the key coping skills, we must first have a more complete and accurate idea of what we are dealing with - stress. Learning these basic principles now will enable you to be more successful in using the techniques covered in the rest of the book. Learning stress management without a good idea of how stress operates is difficult. This first section of the book will teach you the basic principles that you need to know in order to use the iCope methods. Once you learn the basics of how stress works, managing stress will become much easier.

      UNDERSTANDING THE BASICS

      Although it may seem simple, the following model is actually rather sophisticated and supported by decades of research. Stress is a combination of various physical and psychological reactions that occur whenever some demand that requires some kind of action by the person is placed on an individual. Obviously, these demands can range in seriousness from minor irritating situations to severe traumatic events. Regardless of whether the stress is mild or severe, there are certain processes that take place fairly consistently between the time the demand occurs and when the person takes some action to deal with the stress.

      To keep things as clear as possible, we can break down the model of stress into four basic components. Familiarize yourself with these four elements in the following diagram:

      STRESSORS

      Looking at the chart, first notice the demands that are placed upon us. These demands are generally referred to as stressors and include any events, problems, or situations that have an impact on you. Stressors can be short-term events or they can be long-term ongoing problems that require continued attention. Here are some basic facts about stressors:

      1. Anything can be a stressor. Some are short-term situations that pass quickly, whereas others can be chronic and last for long periods of time. Some stressors can develop into a specific phobia so the mere sight of a dog or getting on an airplane can elicit a very strong reaction in individuals who have these fears.

      2. What is perceived as a stressor for one person might not be a stressor

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