Through the Looking Glass: The Journey of a Natural Blonde to Know God

2000).

PART I

THE GREAT ADVENTURE

Everything has a moral, if only you can find it.

Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland, p. 95

That’s right – if you make Insight your priority,

and won’t take no for an answer,

Searching for it like a prospector panning for gold,

like an adventurer on a treasure hunt …

Proverbs 2:3–4 TM

CHAPTER 1

Start Here

Everything has a moral, if only you can find it.

Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland, p. 95

Let those who are wise listen to these proverbs and

become even wiser. And let those who understand receive

guidance by exploring the depth of meaning in these

proverbs, parables, wise sayings, and riddles.

Proverbs 1:5–6

In a most unexpected turn of life’s events, God sent me on a journey in search of my life story. It was an adventure, a treasure hunt you might call it, with God as the Mapmaker. This journey of discovery began as I read of a young girl and her chaotic adventures. God began teaching me how to look for His moral in what might otherwise be an ordinary circumstance or storybook. He began to open up treasures of knowledge that He had hidden in me even though I remained unaware of them. We cannot dismiss the morals of life or we will miss some of the great evidences of God’s glory.

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In John Eldridge’s book, Waking the Dead, he suggests a small group exercise where each person chooses a story or character that helps to give words and interpretation to their own life story, to the words of their life at that moment. Eldridge says: We have to find something that gives our experiences meaning and context.³

I was intrigued enough to put the book down at that point and visit the world of make-believe. It seemed like a fun way to spend five minutes. At first, I cheated and daydreamed about being a famous character whom I wished portrayed my life. I was thinking of someone like Joan of Arc who led a nation into a miraculous battle, or Queen Elizabeth who, after overcoming many obstacles, became one of the greatest queens of England, or Esther, who was willing to risk her life for her people.

Unfortunately, the task was to choose someone who actually related to my personality and/or life situation, so for any number of reasons, I had to confess that none of the former characters would do. This had become a more difficult assignment than I had anticipated. What character would best represent who I really am?

My fun five minutes had escalated into a full day’s worth of mental anguish. Who best fits me? Cinderella? No. I don’t have a mean stepmother, I refuse to clean the fireplace and I don’t need a shining prince. I already have my wonderful husband, Thor. Little Red Riding Hood? Definitely not! She had a big, bad wolf that wanted to eat her. I have a precious pet, Sierra, an Alaskan wolf, whom I love only slightly less than my husband and children. Any story that includes a mean wolf is out! Oscar the Grouch? Well, I might be getting a little closer.

I browsed through my memory of fairy tale and storybook characters but nobody seemed to fit. I couldn’t give up. I had to find that perfect character to give words to my story, to give identity to my person. This simple exercise had captivated me. As I was at a loss to find my character, I asked God to show me who I was like.

As I lay down later that day for a nap, Alice in Wonderland came to mind. What an odd choice! Wasn’t she a little strange? What are you saying, God? What was I to make of this?

I really didn’t even know the Alice story. All I knew was that there was a Mad Hatter and a tea party. But the desire to understand this idea from God was so strong, that I headed out to the bookstore and purchased Lewis Carroll’s Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland.

I realize that this is simply an author’s attempt to entertain children, and that many may consider it rather bizarre for me to find God’s truths in such a book, but I have discovered that God often answers our prayers in what we may consider very bizarre and unique ways.

As I read Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland, I realized I could learn much from this children’s book, if I would venture beyond the words on the pages to the morals that God wanted to teach me. So I ventured. What a discovery God had in store for me! I was sure I had stumbled upon the X that marked the spot where the hidden treasure was buried. I could tell that this was not an ordinary answer to my constant, prayer, God, show me Your ways, teach me Your thoughts. Help me to understand You better, so that I might love You more. No matter how hard life got, how confusing the details, how impossible the situation seemed, my prayer to know God more deeply and more clearly never waned.

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I was your classic middle child. Mediocrity suited me well. Sure, I had dreams, ambitions and a desire to do something great. (Who doesn’t?) But I never really had the tenacity or drive to bring any of my dreams to fruition. It took too much time, cost too much money and demanded too much energy. Any excuse was enough to stop me from reaching the goals I might have set for myself.

Add this to the fact that I came from an extremely unathletic, unmusical family. None of us excelled in any area that required a disciplined regiment of practice, sacrifice and perseverance. The closest any of us came to being athletic was my brother, Jimmy, who is a very good golfer. But his was a natural ability pursued for fun rather than a disciplined approach. I never understood the concept of pushing yourself beyond what you think you can endure. To go beyond the borders of pain and sacrifice was foreign to me. The adventurous life eluded me.

Until I got married, that is. Thor brought into our marriage the gift of adventure. Mr. Adventurous would tell me of his sailing exploits off the coast of Martha’s Vineyard, of being caught in a storm and his parents having to call the Coast Guard, of the wild games he and his brothers played (one of them involved throwing big sticks at each other in the dark). From what I understood, the Colberg boys originated extreme sports.

His stories so terrified me (being one of four sisters and only one brother), that I prayed many times, Please, God, don’t give me boys like Thor and his brothers! A request I am thankful God chose to ignore.

It wasn’t until I was 34 that I had what I would consider my first real lunge into the world of adventure. On a trip to California for one of our annual Vineyard pastors’ conferences, we decided to make a family detour to Yosemite National Park. I was anticipating this trip with much excitement. We planned to take a hike into the depths of the scenic beauty of this natural wonder. We saddled up, our backpacks filled with water bottles, granola bars and bananas. I was ready to take on the rocky terrain complete with swinging bridges, waterfall trails and the giant sequoias. The hike was a challenging eight-and-a-half miles in the heat of summer through precarious mountainous terrain. Here’s the important point – until that very day the furthest I had ever walked was less than two miles on level ground and only in the cool of the day.

We started out at a steady pace at Glacier Point, with its breathtaking panoramic view. Just below the Illilouette Falls, we walked on water – actually, we walked on rocks peeking out of the water making a path over the crystal, clear sparkling creek that separated us from the trail and the Panorama Cliffs. I was on an adventure, and I loved it!

What must have been halfway into our hike, I suggested that we stop for a break and some water. I was huffing and puffing and sweating and just plain miserable. Thor’s response stunned me, But, Bon, we’ve only gone about half a mile.

Uh, oh! I was in trouble. I had seven and a half more miles to go. There was no turning back. I knew I would never make it. But somehow, some six hours later, I staggered to the end of the trail. Literally. The world was spinning, everything was a blur. I was swaying like a drunk. I heard strangers’ voices asking me if I was O.K., if they could get me something, if I needed to sit down. I couldn’t answer. All I could do was put one foot in front of the other with what little strength and determination I had left, willing myself to get to the end so that I could die.

If you’re wondering where my family was at this point, let me tell you something I learned about those whom I am supposed to be able to count on when everyone else deserts me, those who have my best interests at heart. My children all inherited the Colberg let’s-go-for-it-just-do-it spirit, and have no sympathy for a weakling who can’t make an eight-and-a-half-mile hike. I had to eat their dust as they just left me on the trail to fend for myself. It didn’t matter that I was their wife or mother. I could tell you stories!

But I didn’t die. By necessity and determination, I had experienced the spirit of adventure. I learned that an adventure is just that. It requires facing the unknown with expectancy. It means staying on the path and moving towards the finish line when you want to turn around and go back. It means that it isn’t going to be easy, that there are going to be obstacles, difficulties and dangerous situations that must be endured. It will give you the sense of exuberance that is unique to accomplishing something you never thought possible.

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As I searched for a life story, I could sense I was about to embark on another kind of adventure, a treasure hunt with God as the Mapmaker. He had long ago charted the course of my life: the winding roads and the full-steam-ahead highways, the raging rivers and the quiet deserts, the breathtaking mountains and the lonely valleys. He had highlighted the secret trails to explore, exotic places to discover, refreshing watering holes to visit, and the must-see attractions. It wasn’t on the torturous trails of Yosemite Park, but a complex journey of self-discovery.

God chose an unusual and unexpected method to help me read my life. This adventure was to begin with Alice. In this story, God interpreted for me the rivers of rebellion, the deserts of discontent, the mountains of misery and the paths of joy that I had experienced in my life. With my very first reading, I could see in Alice and the other characters some of the same faulty views and inaccurate perceptions of life I had bought into. I related to the characters’ complete disregard for one another and their selfish I-am-all-that-matters lifestyle. I recognized in the words on the page the same futile attempts to find meaning in life that I had tried, only to be disappointed. That’s why God had me read this book. He wanted to steer me back to His truth.

It was quite clear that I had not always recognized God’s methods or interpreted my life events as He would. Some of the morals He had taught me I had not even acknowledged were from Him. Although I might have learned something from them, I had not fully understood the unique manner in which He operates. (Jonah had nothing on me when it came to being a reluctant and slow learner!) But now I was being given a map to chart where I had been and where I was going. A fun and wise God used a book about a little girl to teach another little girl.

I start here – with the awakening that everything has a moral. With this I glance back at how sometimes I heeded the God morals and life was good. I peek through my fingers at the times I missed them. I was like a school bus driver, so focused on racing to get her cargo to school on time that she forgets to pick them up. On this journey I have opened my eyes and witnessed God’s miraculous hand at work in me. And I have had to admit honestly to the times I held back His hand. Remember Elijah? After totally humiliating and crushing the worshippers of Baal and experiencing one of the most amazing acts of God’s power, he goes into the wilderness and has a massive pity party (1 Kings 18–19). We have done the same thing. But that isn’t what God wants from us. He wants to give us better understanding as we explore the depth of meaning of His parables, proverbs and wise sayings.

Before we go any farther, I would be remiss not to mention what many are wondering – why I didn’t title my book Bonnie’s Adventures in Wonderland. I did give it two seconds’ consideration, and thankfully better sense prevailed.

Questions and thoughts for personal reflection and group discussion.

How would you like to go on a God adventure?

What storybook or fictional character do you think best represents you?

Have you settled for an ordinary life, expecting nothing out of the ordinary to happen? Have you settled for a life of mediocrity?

When was your first real adventure? When was the first time you can remember that you stretched yourself beyond what you thought possible?

Can you identify times when you have seen God do something miraculous in your life and then soon after lost that sense of His presence?

Are you ready to face another adventure with God mapping a course for your life?

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God Morals

God chooses unusual and unexpected methods to help you read your life.

Life is an adventure waiting to be experienced through exploring the depth of God’s proverbs, parables, wise sayings and riddles.

God wants us to find His hidden treasures.

³John Eldridge, Waking the Dead, (Nashville, TN: Thomas Nelson, Inc., 2003), p. 194.

CHAPTER 2

Curiouser and Curiouser

Curiouser and curiouser! cried Alice;

now I’m opening out like the largest telescope that ever was!

Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland, p. 11

Listen, O my people, to my instruction:

Incline your ears to the words of my mouth.

I will open my mouth in a parable;

I will utter dark sayings of old.

Psalm 78:1–2 NASB

Through the Alice-Bonnie connection, God began to show me how He has been speaking and how He continues to speak to me in the most unusual places. He opened me up like that largest telescope ever so that I could glimpse into this world, exploring the depths of His wisdom. Jesus and the prophets used parables to teach moral lessons or lessons of life. In