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    Everything About Me Is Fake . . . And I'm Perfect
    Everything About Me Is Fake . . . And I'm Perfect
    Everything About Me Is Fake . . . And I'm Perfect
    Ebook298 pages4 hours

    Everything About Me Is Fake . . . And I'm Perfect

    By Janice Dickinson

    3.5/5

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    About this ebook

    The supermodel and author of the Los Angeles Times bestseller No Lifeguard on Duty tackles the perils of looking perfect and offers commonsense advice about how to feel good about yourself no matter what

    Everything About Me Is Fake is a fast, funny, name-dropping, sexy read about how even the world’s first supermodel doesn’t feel close to perfect and never did—despite appearances to the contrary. This book explores how women spend their lives striving for the unattainable, trying to look like they walked off the pages of a magazine with Jennifer Aniston stick-straight hair bouncing in the breeze and Cover Girl smiles hiding the pain. She discusses why we need to feel perfect, and how our pasts, our unattainable ideas of beauty (thanks to Hollywood), and male expectations all collude to make women feel like they should be perfect.

    Filled with anecdotes from her personal life that will shock and entertain, as well as concrete beauty tips that she learned while modeling, that will help anyone feel better in a matter of minutes, here is a book that no woman should miss.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherHarperCollins
    Release dateOct 13, 2009
    ISBN9780061741852
    Everything About Me Is Fake . . . And I'm Perfect
    Author

    Janice Dickinson

    Janice Dickinson is the world's first supermodel. She has appeared on the cover of every fashion magazine in the world and is the author of No Lifeguard on Duty and Everything About Me Is Fake . . . and I'm Perfect. A former judge on CW's smash hit America's Next Top Model, she lives in Beverly Hills, California, with her two children.

    Read more from Janice Dickinson

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    Reviews for Everything About Me Is Fake . . . And I'm Perfect

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    • 4/5
      This is quite interesting to read. I do not know if it is all true or not, but the stories are fun.

      some good tips about facial - i will give it a try.

    Book preview

    Everything About Me Is Fake . . . And I'm Perfect - Janice Dickinson

    PART I

    MODELING

    I was staying at the most expensive hotel in the Bahamas on a trip for Vogue recently when I spied a woman across the pool. She was having a fight to the death with this very baggy, very hot (in a good way) designer bathing suit, and the damned Lycra cost-a-month’s-rent suit wasn’t cooperating. Naturally, our heroine did the obvious thing: she cursed, smoked, drank real Coke, and looked like she was going to have a nervous breakdown in the midday sun.

    Seeing that she could use a few words of wisdom from this Big Dog, I put on my beige Manolo Blahnik stiletto pool sandals and sauntered over to her in the sexiest way. (How, exactly? We’ll talk later.)

    Honey, I said, approaching her as she shot me the look of death. I didn’t blame her: there are times in life when the last thing you need is some tall model getting in your face with swimsuit advice. But I felt it was my duty, as a fellow member of the X chromosome set, to go on.

    "Hello? I can feel your pain, I whispered while she continued to adjust and glare. I had to wear that exact suit when I was shot by Irwin Penn for Vogue. It took me and three stylists five hours to get me into that fucking suit, and it only fit right because, a few months before, I got myself a brand new pair of 36C’s to hold it up."

    The woman stopped her tugging and stared up at me. Now she was interested.

    On top of that, I spent two hours in hair and makeup. Then three assistants had to use large workman’s clamps to get my surgically enhanced body into that suit, but it still didn’t fit right. Finally someone had to open a seam on the suit and sew me into it. Oh, and later they retouched the photos in the computer, I said. Then, for good measure: I’m only telling you this because maybe you saw the suit in the magazine with me in it. Maybe you thought, ‘Hot suit. I don’t care how much it costs. I want to look like that.’ Well, I’m here to tell you it’s impossible for you or me to ever look like that without a team of beauty experts riding shotgun.

    By that point the woman—a very pretty blonde in her late twenties with an almost perfect bod—put out her cigarette, grabbed a Kleenex, and almost burst into tears.

    I thought it was me, she sobbed. I kept thinking, ‘What’s wrong with me? After spending six hundred dollars on a bathing suit, I still can’t make it look right!’ I figured my body was just falling apart.

    I had to pose in that suit for five hours, I told her. "By the time we were done I was ready to go under the knife again myself—who wouldn’t want to make that suit look the way some moronic designer intended? Thing is—it’s literally

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