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    Spending the Holidays with People I Want to Punch in the Throat: Yuletide Yahoos, Ho-Ho-Humblebraggers, and Other Seasonal Scourges
    Unavailable
    Spending the Holidays with People I Want to Punch in the Throat: Yuletide Yahoos, Ho-Ho-Humblebraggers, and Other Seasonal Scourges
    Unavailable
    Spending the Holidays with People I Want to Punch in the Throat: Yuletide Yahoos, Ho-Ho-Humblebraggers, and Other Seasonal Scourges
    Audiobook5 hours

    Spending the Holidays with People I Want to Punch in the Throat: Yuletide Yahoos, Ho-Ho-Humblebraggers, and Other Seasonal Scourges

    Published by Penguin Random House Audio

    3.5/5

    ()

    Currently unavailable

    Currently unavailable

    About this audiobook

    For fans of Laurie Notaro and Jenny Lawson comes an uproarious and oddly endearing essay collection for anyone trying to survive the holidays in one piece.

    When it comes to time-honored holiday traditions, Jen Mann pulls no punches

    In this hilariously irreverent collection of essays, Jen Mann, nationally bestselling author of People I Want to Punch in the Throat, turns her mordant wit on the holidays. On Mann's naughty list: mothers who go way overboard with their Elf on the Shelf, overzealous carolers who can't take a hint, and people who write their Christmas cards in the third person ("Joyce is enjoying Bunko. Yeah, Joyce, we know you wrote this letter."). And on her nice list . . . well, she's working on that one. Here, no celebration is off-limits. The essays include:

    • You Can Keep Your Cookies, I'm Just Here for the Booze
    • Nice Halloween Costume. Was Skank Sold Out?
    • Why You Won't Be Invited to Our Chinese New Year Party

    From hosting an ill-fated Chinese New Year party, to receiving horrible gifts from her husband on Mother's Day, to reluctantly telling her son the truth about the Easter Bunny, Mann knows the challenge of navigating the holidays while keeping her sanity intact. And even if she can't get out of attending another Christmas cookie exchange, at least she can try again next year.

    Praise for Spending the Holidays with People I Want to Punch in the Throat

    "Mann's writing has transcended from witty anecdotes and complaints to notable satire. Hidden among the many laugh-out-loud zingers are lessons on how we relate to each other, and how ridiculous parenting culture has become."-Associated Press

    "Following the success of her first book, she is now punching throats at holidays, starting from her being age two and continuing to the present, where she is a harried mother bemoaning not just Christmas but all holidays. . . . Harried holiday haters will chuckle and perhaps see themselves somewhere in Mann's lifetime dislike of and misbehavior during America's increasingly commercialized celebrations."-Booklist

    "The cure for my cold holiday spirit this year is the sidesplitting new book by Jen Mann. . . . Mann delivers her signature punch lines and sharp critique on the oftentimes ridiculous shenanigans of the modern family. Her ability to make an otherwise boring subject come alive with colorful personalities, biting sarcasm, and impressively astute observations on suburban culture is what makes Mann so much fun to read and so easy to relate to."-The Huffington Post

    "A lighthearted, laugh-out-loud book . . . with a feel of peeking into a diary."-Mommy's Memorandum

    "It really does make you laugh out loud."-Shooting Stars Mag

    "A quick and delightful read that you can sneak in right before bed or when the kids are finally napping."-FangirlNation

    "Grab a cup of hot cocoa, sit back and enjoy Jen's latest collection of humorous rants dissecting the 'most wonderful time' of the year. She unleashes her biting wit and hilarious opinions on everything from cookie exchanges to annual humblebrag Christmas letters from overachieving moms to horrifying Christmases of her childhood."-Creating Serenity

    "[Mann] has really mastered the short story format. . . . She packs the maximum amount of funny into the fewest words, and many of these essays are downright hilarious. . . . If you've read and liked her other books, you will definitely want to read this one, too."-Bug Bug Book Reviews


    From the Trade Paperback edition.
    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherPenguin Random House Audio
    Release dateOct 13, 2015
    ISBN9781101922897
    Unavailable
    Spending the Holidays with People I Want to Punch in the Throat: Yuletide Yahoos, Ho-Ho-Humblebraggers, and Other Seasonal Scourges

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    Reviews for Spending the Holidays with People I Want to Punch in the Throat

    3.5/5

    57 ratings19 reviews

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    • 4/5
      If you're a burgeoning Martha Stewart with ten color-coordinated Christmas Pinterest boards you might want to skip this one. If, like me, you ever feel intimidated by the holiday cheer and Yuletide overachievement of others, you and Jen and I are kindred souls. Irreverent, foul-mouthed, and brutally honest, this book covers the dark side of holidays past (begging for Guess jeans & neon in the 80s; the nasty Santa in the run-down mall), and holidays present (forgetting to move the Elf on the Shelf; wishing you could just go to a cookie exchange empty handed, hit the spiked punch, and crawl cookie-less out the back door unless someone made something with equal parts chocolate and fat).The holiday newsletter parody alone is a laugh riot. Why do we DO this to ourselves, and why do we just keep upping the ante until the holidays are intolerable for anyone without a full-time household staff? Let's spend November and December on an island somewhere and skip the whole business. Except that we don't really want to, we want to have some kind of Christmas with our loved ones. Just not our mother's kind. Ain't nobody got time for that.
    • 4/5
      I wasn't really sure what I was getting into when I saw this book for review. I loved the title and though that it would be funny regardless of what it was. The way I read the title I thought it would be able various people we all want to "punch in the throat" during the holidays but was happy to find out that Jen Mann runs a blog called such and this was a collection of her stories of the holidays.

      Now I have to be honest, more than once I had to stop reading and ask myself, 'oh crap is this woman in MY family?' -- sadly no, but we have lived through some very similar things especially during the holidays so I found this book VERY relatable.

      Mann's tales of the holidays are laugh-out-loud funny and I found myself enjoying all of them. I was even sad when the book ended. I will definitely be stopping be her blog to check it out, so if you have no idea who she is and happen on this book, know that, you can still crack-up reading it. This book was a wonderful start to my holiday reading.
    • 4/5
      Before reading this book, I was not familiar with Jen Mann or her blog/books. Since reading this book, I have put her books in my cart on Amazon, added them to my Goodreads lists, and I now follow her blog. This book made me laugh out loud on more than one occasion. From her dislike of everything pumpkin spice, to her dread of going to cookie exchanges, Jen speaks to my underachieving soul. Pick up this book if you're looking for a light, fun, read for the holidays!
    • 4/5
      Spending the Holidays With People I Want to Punch in the Throat by Jen MannPublished by Ballantine Books ISBN 978034554990Trade paperback, $16, 224 pagesI was sorry that I didn't post a review for Spending the Holidays With People I Want to Punch in the Throat before the holidays because it was such perfect antidote for those of us who feel that the holidays can be a bit overwhelming and we somehow don't do it as well as everyone else.Jen Mann's mother goes all out for Christmas, with multiple themed trees in every room. It takes her weeks to get all of her decorations out and weeks to put it away. She never throws any holiday decoration away, and adds more to it each year.Perhaps as a reaction to all of this holiday merriment, Jen has an aversion to all of the holiday hoopla. She does buy Christmas gifts throughout the year for her two kids, and hides them so well she thinks she should create a treasure map because when the time comes to wrap them she has no idea where they are, and sometimes they are not found in time. (Been there, done that.)Jen's young daughter has inherited her grandmother's joy of Christmas, so she has been given hand-me-down decorations much to Jen's utter dismay. Jen also shares the panic all of us parents have faced as our children's Christmas list change at the very last moment and the hunt for that ultimate gift is on.I loved Jen's descriptions of conversations between the mommies who spend all day at yoga class as they describe the gift of cosmetic procedures bestowed on them by their husbands, and their un-ironic Christmas letters sent with all of their family members' brilliant achievements. Needless to say, Jen's letter is completely different.If the holidays were just too much for you, Spending the Holidays With People I Want to Punch in the Throat may just be the cure for you. I laughed a lot at it. (Note- the language is a little salty for some.) People who like Jenny Lawson and Jen Lancaster will enjoy this. I recommend it.Jen Mann has a website- People I Want To Punch in the Throat and it can be found here.
    • 4/5
      I received this book as part of the Librarything early reviewer program. I was not familiar with the author Jenn Mann or her blog--but did find the title intriguing (there are so many times I feel the same way). I started reading the book during the holiday season--it was the antidote I needed for the stress of the season! There were chapters that had me laughing out loud. This book will not be for everyone. Ms. Mann at times says things we may want to say about our family particularly our children and significant other, but that most would not say out loud--though I am pretty sure it is said out of love. My favorite chapters were those involving Ms. Mann's mother and her family--the first holiday overachievers. My favorite chapter--I want my MacDonald's--it makes me laugh just thinking about it. 4 out of 5 stars.
    • 3/5
      I don't read Jen Mann's blog on a regular basis, but I have read her previous book People I Want to Punch in the Throat. I thought that book was hilarious. This one, not quite so much. It definitely had its moments, but it also felt like she was trying too hard to find enough Christmas-related subjects to fill an entire book. There were some repeated ancedotes (ok, I get it already that your daughter is hoarding all the Christmas ornaments that your mom got rid of), and many of the essays just went on too long (i.e. the "humblebrag Christmas letter"). This book made me smile, and laugh a couple times (the essay about her and her husband trying to get an ancient TV out of their house was laugh-out-loud funny because I could totally relate), but not like her first book.
    • 3/5
      This is a Advanced Uncorrected Proof I won here on LT. Mann has a blog (I'd never heard of) but this is a collection of essays about the holidays spent with family. It turns out that almost all her writing is about her children and being a mom, and rather than the 20's snarkiness I'd expected from the title, the stories are more amusing than funny. I thought the most interesting was the one about how she and her husband came up with the idea of celebrating Chinese New Year as their thing to draw attention for their realty business. It was such a success that the party grew to unmanageable proportions and they found their own house getting trashed in the process.
    • 4/5
      This book was hilariously funny! This writer reminds me of my friends and the snarky comments we all seem to have! The essays reminders me of so many holiday stories in my personal life that I think we may be related...If you are looking for a fun holiday book that pokes fun at the craziness of the season this is for you.
    • 3/5
      This book tried way too hard to be funny. The author writes how she doesn’t go all out for Christmas, but her mother and daughter are huge Christmas decorating nuts. Most of the stories are over the top, and quite ridiculous. I understand exaggeration for comic effect, but these stories were outlandish and too far fetched to be believable.
    • 3/5
      I don't read Jen Mann's blog on a regular basis, but I have read her previous book People I Want to Punch in the Throat. I thought that book was hilarious. This one, not quite so much. It definitely had its moments, but it also felt like she was trying too hard to find enough Christmas-related subjects to fill an entire book. There were some repeated ancedotes (ok, I get it already that your daughter is hoarding all the Christmas ornaments that your mom got rid of), and many of the essays just went on too long (i.e. the "humblebrag Christmas letter"). This book made me smile, and laugh a couple times (the essay about her and her husband trying to get an ancient TV out of their house was laugh-out-loud funny because I could totally relate), but not like her first book.
    • 5/5
      Funny, Amusing, Merry, Delightful, Entertaining, Comical. These are just some of the words I use to describe this book. I read it in 2 days because I couldn't put it down. I love that Jenn Mann can kid about what's "PC" and what's not without being offensive. If you are looking for a pick-me-up, for just want to smile - this is the book for you.
    • 3/5
      Having read a few other books that started as blogs, I didn't have high hopes. But this book surprised me- it's much funnier and heartwarming than I expected. The title suggests a level of bitching and moaning that could be rather annoying, but instead, the writing is a balance of self-deprecation, humor, and a genuine love for family and friends. Most of the chapters felt like they taken straight from her blog, but this didn't bother me like it has in some books I've read.
    • 4/5
      If you're a burgeoning Martha Stewart with ten color-coordinated Christmas Pinterest boards you might want to skip this one. If, like me, you ever feel intimidated by the holiday cheer and Yuletide overachievement of others, you and Jen and I are kindred souls. Irreverent, foul-mouthed, and brutally honest, this book covers the dark side of holidays past (begging for Guess jeans & neon in the 80s; the nasty Santa in the run-down mall), and holidays present (forgetting to move the Elf on the Shelf; wishing you could just go to a cookie exchange empty handed, hit the spiked punch, and crawl cookie-less out the back door unless someone made something with equal parts chocolate and fat).The holiday newsletter parody alone is a laugh riot. Why do we DO this to ourselves, and why do we just keep upping the ante until the holidays are intolerable for anyone without a full-time household staff? Let's spend November and December on an island somewhere and skip the whole business. Except that we don't really want to, we want to have some kind of Christmas with our loved ones. Just not our mother's kind. Ain't nobody got time for that.
    • 3/5
      It wasn't clear to me why she wanted to punch her family in the throat. Generally they seemed quite pleasant. Some essays hit a comic nerve, but others were trying too hard. I thought Jenny Lawson's book was much funnier.
    • 4/5
      I received an Early Reviewer copy of this book from LibraryThing.Fairly humorous little book of essays from Jen Mann who evidently pens a blog of the same name. One essay had me laughing til I cried! I will never open the door to Christmas carolers again without thinking of it!
    • 4/5
      I received this book from Netgalley in exchange for an honest review.

      Perfect book for my Christmas in 2015: I’m pretty much home alone this December. Not to sound all schmaltzy or depressing, but my children (and granddaughters) aren’t coming home this year for Christmas, and my wife is out in California for most of the month helping a niece whose husband passed away this weekend after a three-year battle with cancer. So, not much holiday cheer in my household other than a Pandora Christmas station playing in the background while I’m watching NHL hockey and football bowl games (and reading, of course).

      This is a drastic change. Normally, my wife and I go all out decorating the house starting on Thanksgiving evening and working all day Black Friday, much like the author’s over-the-top-when-it-comes-to-Christmas mother. We have the Christmas village (20 buildings and growing), snowmen, Christmas settings for the formal dining table, lights outside on the trees, all the “standard” stuff and a lot more. It's a two-hour job just to get everything out of the attic. As much as I say I don't like the work that goes into the decorating, it is worth the effort, especially when we get to see our granddaughters' eyes light up when they arrive.

      The thing I liked most about the book is that while the author seems to be bashing Christmas and all that comes with it, there is a real feeling of how much she actually enjoys the season. Like rushing out with her fiancé to buy a tree when her parents decide to come to New York one year or making sure her daughter (who has the Christmas gene) is able to decorate the THREE trees in her room to her hearts content. Jen Mann may not be insanely crazy about Christmas, but she obviously loves the people around her that do, and is willing to take a step towards the extra mile to make sure their Christmases are special.

      This book is light-hearted and very funny, and she highlights things that we all think at one point or another about Christmas. This is an enjoyable collection that can be read over and over again for the simple reason that it elicits our own Christmas memories. Highly recommended!
    • 2/5
      What do say about this book? I guess with that title, I didn’t think the book would be all sweetness and light. And it wasn’t. Spending the Holidays with People I want to Punch in the Throat by Jen Mann Is categorized at humor, but I never laughed out loud once. At most it brought an embarrassed titter. Spending the Holidays with People I want to Punch in the Throat by Jen Mann is also categorized as personal memoir. Throughout I kept on thinking to myself, there’s probably a kernel of truth here, but there is so much exaggeration that I think it probably should be called fiction. And if memoir is supposed to reveal something of the author’s internal life, introspection is pretty much missing.The writing is clever, sarcastic and edgy, with a lot of coarse language that didn’t add much to the mix, in my opinion. Younger readers may not even noticed the profanity. Spending the Holidays with People I Want to Punch in the Throat by Jen Mann reminded me of the book (from the 1950s) Life Among the Savages by Shirley Jackson, a well-known horror writer, who was writing about her children. I didn’t much like that book either, but critics loved it and it’s still in print. I’m willing to concede that, although I wasn’t impressed, other readers may be.Review based on ARC from Publisher
    • 3/5
      I am going to preface this by saying that right before reading this book – I read “Dad is Fat” by Jim Gaffigan. Two different types of humor, for sure, but coming off a book that was laugh out loud, shake the bed while my husband is sleeping, probably colors this review.While I enjoyed the book – it wasn’t until page 102 that I found myself laughing. While Jen Mann both in the book and in the title makes it clear that she is trying for a snarky, just this side of very mean tone as she talks about holiday traditions/practices that annoy her – what came across was that she was irritated by the excess and “over-the-top” aspect – but that deep down, she loved the holidays, especially Christmas and that she appreciated the care and feeling behind them.As much as I found genuine in the book – I also did find some parts genuinely funny. Her description of an over-the-top cookie exchange party was great. “There’s always one pushy broad who wants you to take hers, even though you’ve passed it by. Twice. “Try the biscotti, Jen. I think you’ll love them!” I plaster on a fake smile and say, “I’m allergic to biscotti.” “I didn’t know that was possible.” I shrug. “Yeah, it’s a new allergy. I’m having one of those medical alert bracelets made. It’s a real problem. I can’t have biscotti, gingerbread or sugar cookies. I also can’t have anything made in a home with cats. Were these chocolate mint brownies made by a cat owner?”“The hostess stops dumping booze in the cider and speaks up. “I made those, Jen. We just have fish.” “Perfect! I’ll take double of those since I’m leaving the biscotti.”Or when she is eavesdropping on a pack of power moms at the mall who are trying to find the cheapest possible gifts for the people in their lives that take care of their every need – yet who the power moms don’t see the point of spending actual money on. “Now that the gifts for the unimportant in their lives have been decided, the conversation moves into the I’m-so-tired humblebrag zone. This is where all of them must compete against one another to see who is literally the busiest and most exhausted. In order to win the title of Most Overscheduled, you can’t just have a calendar full of shopping dates and hair appointment. That simply won’t do. Workouts must be doubled – because it’s cookie season.” (What made this funnier for me was the number of times the power moms then used the word LITERALLY in the dialogue that follows.)The funniest scene was when Jen and her husband (“The Hubs”) were getting ready for a Thanksgiving turkeypalooza, decided they needed new TVs, and then tried to find a way to get rid of their old, huge, now-obsolete TVs – which proves much more difficult than they thought. “Donate them? Where? You said only one can be donated.” “That’s true. Only this organization will take the little one.” He showed me a website on his laptop. I shook my head. “No way. I don’t like that organization and what they stand for. I don’t want to donate to them,” I said. “Why? What’s wrong with them?” “You know why I don’t like them. They’re one of those groups that think you can pray the gay away. I refuse to have their programs benefitting from my television.”“Spending the Holidays with People I Want to Punch in the Throat” was sentimental, amusing, and very funny at times – just not as many times as I had thought.
    • 3/5
      Holiday Laughs Mann presents a fun, quick, easy to read book of her stories about the holidays. Several times my wife looked at me questionably as I snorted and laughed out loud while reading this. The author's stories led me to reminisce about my own experiences with relatives during the holidays, leading to remember many happy and memorable events. If you are in the mood for a light hearted, fun book, give this one a chance. I received this book from NetGalley in exchange for a honest review.