Lion's Roar

Loving Your Inner Critic

SHARON SALZBERG: I was once on stage with the Dalai Lama when he started talking about his mother, who he always says was his greatest teacher. “She taught me compassion,” he said. “She taught me everything.”

I could feel the mood in the room go down because many of us were thinking about how hard life is if you didn’t have a parent like that. So I raised my hand and said, “I didn't have that kind of childhood.” And both the Dalai Lama and his translator, their mouths went, “Awwww!” [drags down corners of mouth with fingers to make sad face. Laughter]. They looked so sad.

Although I didn’t have a mother like the Dalai Lama’s, what I did have was a strong intention. I wanted to be better. I wanted to make a different kind of life for myself. I found sources of love and ways to love. I found it without that childhood the Dalai Lama had.

ROSANNE CASH: I had a tough childhood too. My father was a drug addict. My mother was enraged about it and very distracted. But I was resilient and created imaginary adults who were safe. I knew early on that I was an artist, and that art and music could save me. And they have—many times.

I wonder why certain people’s longing for love and art and healing is so great that it carries them through terrible trauma, and other people, who don’t have that longing, give up right away. I think longing is a wonderful

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