How to Win Friends &

Influence People
Dale Carnegie
Tim Calnon
Chair, Leadership Development Workgroup
Buffalo, 2013
 Fundamental Techniques
in Handling People
• Don’t Criticize, Complain or Condemn

• Generate Importance

• Bait the hook to suit the fish

 Six Ways to Make
People Like You
• Become Genuinely Interested in Others

• Smile 

• The Power of
Using a Name
 Six Ways to Make
People Like You
• Be an Exceptional Listener!

• Talk in Terms of Other

People’s Interests

• Make the Other Person Feel Important –

and do it Sincerely
 Be a Leader: How to Change
People Without Giving Offense or
Arousing Resentment
• Begin with Praise and Honest Appreciation

• Talk About Your Own Mistakes First

• Ask Questions

• Praise Any and All Improvement

 Be a Leader: How to Change
People Without Giving Offense
or Arousing Resentment

• Praise Any and All Improvement

• Ask Questions
The One Thing You
Need to Know
Marcus Buckingham

Nancy R. Honeycutt, CAE

ASDA Executive Director
NLC Co-chair
Great Managing

Great Leading

Sustained Individual Success

Managing & Leading

What’s the difference?

 Great Managers

The essence of great

management is not getting work
done through people but getting
people done through work.
 Great Managers
• Turn one person’s talent into performance
• Serve the company by first serving the
employee through coaching
 Great Managers
• Select good people

• Define clear expectations

• Recognize excellence & praise it

• Care for their employees

• Discover what’s unique & capitalize on it

 Great Managers
Strong teams are built on interdependency

• I need you

• I rely on you

• I value you

You can do things I can’t do

 Great Leaders

• The essence of great leadership is

striving to make others see a better
future.
• Can persuade others to join together
to make this future come true
 Great Leaders
• Have an image of the future clear in mind
• Can rally people to a better future
 Great Leaders
• Remain focused on the future

• Are optimistic

• Have integrity

• Are dissatisfied with the status quo

• Impatient for progress

• Nothing can undermine their faith that things will

get better
 Play both roles
Manage: begins with the person

Lead: picture of where you are headed

There is no “I” in “team”
-- an old cliche

There is an “I” in “win”

-- Michael Jordan
 Individual Success
• What don’t you like doing? STOP doing it
• Cut out activities & people that pull you
off your path
Individual Success is your
Responsibility
Free to cultivate and refine your unique
areas of strength
Drive: The Surprising Truth
About What Motivates Us
Daniel Pink

LT Dan Hammer, DC, USN

2010-2011 District 11 Trustee
Pacific, 2011
Our third drive…
Harlow and Deci
The Rise and Fall of
Motivation 2.0
Carrots and Sticks do Not Work…
Most of the Time
Type X and Type I
Autonomy
Mastery
Purpose
 Summary

• Motivation 2.0 is GONE…

Motivation 3.0 is HERE

• Three components of Type I

– Autonomy
– Mastery
– Purpose