The Day the Dancers Came

By: Bienvenido N. Santos

SCENE 1
Fil: Snow! It’s snowing!

Tony: Huh? What’s that?

Fil: It’s snowing, Tony!
Oh Dios mio, they’ll love
this, they’ll love this!
Tony: OK, who’ll love
that?
Fil: The dancers, of course! They’re arriving
today and they’ll see snow and love it
because it’s probably their first snow! I
know it.

Tony: How do you know it wasn’t snowing

in New York while they were here?
Fil: Pfft, snow, in New York in early
November? Are you stupid?
Tony: Stupid? Ever since you heard of
those dancers from the Philippines,
you’ve been acting stupid: baliw! As if
they’re coming here for you!
Fil: I know it’s silly but it does
feel like that!

Tony: I’m becoming a cracker—a

white man! Blegh!
Fil: Oh, I know who’s baliw: the sick
guy with his sick thoughts. You’re
selfish, caring nothing but your
imaginary pain.

Tony: Oh, brother. Trust me. I got the

real thing. Why’d you think I retired?
Fil: Brother, you’re only getting old. Sick,
sure, but not with cancer. Psh.

Tony: Excuse me, but I know what I’m

diagnosed with and it’s painful! You know,
you’re going to miss me because one day, I’m
just going to die.
Fil: Who says you won’t? All of us
will die, friend. Maybe a bomb will
land on Chicago and bam! Tapos na.

Tony: Baka iyong mga dancer mo.

Fil: Of course they’ll survive it! No bomb is
going to fall from the sky during their show!
Unless a bomb is dropped in the Philippines
when they go back—

Tony: What’s that to you? You don’t have

family over there any more, right? That
bomb’s going to be nothing for me; I’m sure
I’ll be dead before that.
Fil: Gee, glad I can count on you to give me
my daily dose of pessimism!

Fil: OK. Just help me out instead. How will I

talk to them? How do I introduce myself? I
want to show them I’m a Filipino too and
that they can trust me to take them sigh-
seeing! Oh, dear, I’ll invite them over for
dinner!
Tony: How will I talk to them and
convince them I’m not a human
trafficker?

Fil: Gosh, Tony. I wish I had your looks,

even with those white spots, then I could
face everyone of them. But jusko this
face!
Tony: Your face is your calling
card, though. It says: Filipino.
Countrymen.

Fil: Oh, please. My face screams,

Ugly Filipino. Old-timer,
muchaho.
Fil: Time is my worst enemy! Look at
how much I’ve aged! My face and
my soul are both losyang already.
Oh, and I have to add, this face also
screams, sucker!

Tony: For sure.

Fil: But who’ll care? I’m sure they’re
just as happy as I am to find Filipinos
here in the States! I make a mean
adobo and rellenong manok. Mmm,
sarap…
Tony: Mmm, sarap, lasang ilusionada! You
live on loose change and now you want to
spend your money on dancing kids who don’t
know you and will not even so much as send
you a card?

Fil: Asus, cards. Who wants them? I know

how I can preserve every moment… with my
magic sound mirror.
Fil: Fall, snow, fall… As soon as they
agree to come over, I’ll call you. You
won’t even have to do anything, I
just want you to be here when I
meet them.
Tony: Well, I’m going out myself, and
I don’t know what time I’ll be back…
Hold on, you aren’t working today,
you on leave?

Fil: Yep, for two days! While the

dancers of mine are here.
Tony: Don’t make sense to me, but whatever.
Good luck, musketeer.

Fil: Aren’t you coming tonight? Our seats are right

out in front!

Tony: I know, but I don’t think I can come… I want

to, but I’m sick, remember? Today’s the day my
doctor will tell me just what kind of kulam has
gotten into me.
Fil: What do you mean? What
will he tell you? What’s he trying
to--

Tony: If it’s cancer.*

SCENE 2
*Fil: Tony, Tony! What’s the
matter?

Tony: I was dying.*

SCENE 3
*Tony: Parekoi, one more shot!

Fil: Bet your bottom dollar that the Americans

can’t drink as hard as Filipinos! This lambanog
with a real dead snake’s definitely going to send
us crawling back home!

Tony: Oh, imagine the look on those whites who

can’t even handle duck fetus!*
SCENE 4
*Fil: Alright well, I’ll be seeing you. Try to be
home on time… I’ll be inviting the dancers to our
humble abode for lunch or dinner tomorrow, but
tonight let’s go catch the play, yeah?

Tony: OK, I’ll try.*

________________________________________

Fil: Gusto ko nang umuwi

SCENE 5
*Fil: Ilocano ka? Bicol? Paisano ba kamo?
Comusta? Ay, kumusta, kababayan! Pinoy
rin ako!

Fil: Utang na loob, where’s Tony when

you need him?
*Fil: Beloved countrymen, children of the
house of the Pearl of the Orient Seas,
people of the Tinubuang lupa, the
name… is Fil. Fil Acayan. I have come to
render myself slave to your every wish
and desire: be it a tour of Chicago, or a
delightful supper involving world-class
Filipino cuisine at my residence.
Bellboy: I’m sorry, sir, I’m afraid you
cannot stand on top of our chair and just
be the mad man that you are.
__________________________________

Fil: Hello, would you like to visit my

apartment?
Male dancer 1: Uh, excuse us,
please…
______________________________
Fil: Kumusta! Is there any way I can
get you guys to come to my
apartment?
Female dancer 1: Thank you, but
we’re busy.
______________________________

Male dancer 2: Pardon me, please…

Fil: Wait! Teka lang!*
________________________

*Fil: Ay, hala! Sorry, sorry!*

SCENE 6
Fil: I just… wished I’d see them one
last time in the river or the park…
What’s a lonely old man gotta do to
meet some young Filipino dancers?
______________________________
Dream:
*Tony: I have discovered something!
I have discovered a new way of
keeping yourself afloat!

Fil: Who the hell wants to do that?

Tony: Shipwreck, duh!

Fil: Oh, please. Who cares about

shipwrecks? The dancers—

Tony: But this is more important than

your stupid dancers! Hindi ka ba
natatakot malunod?
Fil: I’m more scared of being eaten by
a huge pating… Pating ina! How ‘bout
you find a way to swim back ashore
before the sharks come at you?

Tony: Oh, I will!

*Fil: Lord, how can today not be
any more devastating? I tried
everything; I did everything!
Punyeta, I tried all the Filipino
dialect accents there are: Ilokano,
Bicolano, Tagalog – Batangueno…
yet, none!
Fil: They walked away from me
even after I invited them here for
dinner! If anything, I wouldn’t
ever pass up on such an
invitation… How cruel can they
be? It’s as if I was a stranger to
them, an infernal nuisance, even.
Fil: Pilipino rin ako! What other
reason should I have for them to
say yes? Man, I used to dance
too. Gwapo ako noong araw; you
can ask anyone in the village.
Fil: I was quite the looker, an
infamous cassanova. All I wanted
was to spend money on them, to
tour them around, to just
experience what it feels like to be
Filipino again. God, what the fuck
am I saying?*
Tony: Do you mind if I interject
someth—

Fil: I wanted them to go back to the

Philippines with stories of their
encounter with the lovely old Filipino
lolo they met during their visit.
Fil: Si lolo, ang husay kumanta! Hayup
kung magluto: daig pa karinderya, daig
pa ang Max’s! Sa sobrang sarap, para
kang napadpad sa langit. Kasama niya
yung tape recorder niya, ni-record niya
ang buong gabi at ang sabi pa’y sa aming
pag-alis ay aalalahanin niya raw ang
nagdaan ng gabing iyon…
Tony: Do you realize how creepy you
sound?

Fil: Tony! They said they were busy. They

thanked me, but they said they had no
time. Others said nothing. Mukha ba
akong basura sa kanila? Am I Filipino
enough?
Tony: You done? Because I still
have to teach you how to remain
afloat.*
___________________________

*Fil: This should do.*

SCENE 7
SCENE 8
*Fil: Ahh, I guess I’ll listen to this
again. I’ll never get tired of this!

Tony: Oh my God… Tangina

naman! AAAAAAAGH!
Fil: Tony, what did the doctor
say?? What did he say?

Tony: So they didn’t come after

all?
Fil: Tony, ano ngang sinabi ng
doctor?!

Tony: I knew they wouldn’t come –

the dancers. But that’s okay, this
apartment is old and it smells of
death.
Fil: Anong death? Hindi, Tony. You
will be cured. In this country,
anything can be cured!

Tony: I could have seen the

dancers… I have seen their picture,
but what do they really look like, Fil?
Tell me.
Fil: Tony, they’re beautiful, all of them!
Especially the girls. Their complexion,
mala-toblerone! Their grace, their eyes
na parang sa tingin pa lang kinakausap
ka na. At… ang bango-bango nila!

Fil: No... No, no, no!!!

Fil: Tony! I’ve lost them all… I’ve lost
them all… (5 repeats)

*Tony: It’s okay, Fil. I know it’s here. The

memory of the day the dancers came.

END
The Day the Dancers Came
By: Bienvenido N. Santos