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SEX ISSUE

R U Lnly 2Nite?
An appreciation of Craigslists Casual Encounters

f you are seeking a better, more honest understanding of human sexuality, one unhampered by social conventions like morality and shame, might we direct you to Craigslists Casual Encounters section? I am 24 white young professional here in Cville. Im 21, light skinned black female, shoulder length hair,light brown eyes and thick in all the right places. We are a happily married couple with an extraordinary sex life. If the personals section were a singles bar, then Casual Encounters would be the bars bathroom wall. Its where we find the number to call for a good time, where we go to hook up with strangers and satisfy our wildest desires. But its more than that. Its also where we look for things we cant find in our daily lives, and things were too afraid to even admit to wanting. I am 5'11 blonde hair blue eyes six pack. I have a thing for black women but I have never been with one. I still have my virginity, Im asking you to take it from me. Gay guy wanting to get off with girl Casual Encounters is rife with dishonesty to be sure; anonymity, secret lives, exaggerated claims of length and girth. But it is dishonesty in service to truth. By denying who we are by day, were free to reveal who we want to be by night. I want to be screwed while I wear pantyhose tonight Would love to daddy forces daughter role play Have a fantasy to see a guy who can suck himself... Is that you? Is there a group of students who jerk off to porn together? Maybe two first year roommates in old dorms? I wanna join a group of guys, preferably undergrads. Even better if youre straight. Because of the proliferation of spammers, prostitutes, and vice cops out to trap the unwary, posting on Craigslist can at times resemble a hormonal Turing test. There is a constant obsession with authenticity, a continual hope that the person on the other end of the screen is real. TOO MANY FAKE PEOPLE ON HERE!!! Just watched the game... tell me who won, so I know your not a spam bot!! Im real. A handsome caring man that would love to hold you. Im trying this again because all I get hit with is spam, I want to meet someone real. I AM REAL Desire knows no down time. People post all day and all night, often with an urgency and immediacy thats a little frightening.

ANY ONE WANT TO PLAY IM AT PEN PARK BEHIND THE TENNIS COURT WAITING Posts can be funny, even if unintentionally: looking for a pregnant lady to have fun with ...if not pregnant, its ok I think I have one of the best looking dicks ever seen....if there was modeling for dicks mine would be a supermodel Some are cryptic ciphers written in text-ese: Hosting 35 510 u up 4 the ride tite ass waitn 2 get rimmed vers lookn 2 get u off send a pic 4 a pic Others are lines of demonic poetry: looking for someone to come by today and breed my mouth. People regularly fail to capitalize the word I, as if their id was sneaking around be-

hind their egos back. They write in run-on sentences with no attention to punctuation or spelling, their words coming out manic and sweaty. You can almost hear the posters elevated pulse. posted before meet a guy fuck he was hot looking for someone 18 to 40 black white i dont care discreet yes no game playes or people looking to get paid sad i know im looking for sex yes sex im vertile clean safe discreet love dick lol hit me boy And of course through it all runs a steady current of loneliness. Are you in a marriage or relationship and yet feeling alone? I am. In many ways, my wife is excellent. However, she does not enjoy or crave intimacy. My friends are all married or dating so they go home early to fuck leaving me ... a

bit drunk and horny and back at my place alone. Wanna just cuddle and sleep or fuck and go? Im game for either. w4m 24 (cville) I want to cuddle and more tonight, now... feeling so lonely. Im real it was snowing earlier today. What they all share, these tiny cris de groin, is a raw openness thats nearly impossible to find anywhere else. What could be more honest than people telling each other what they need, what they really need, free of fear or shame? Are we ever more primal than when were naked and nameless and in the dark? Are we ever more alive than when we say, i am horny, i am lonely, I AM REAL?J. Tobias Beard

1-3 Thats how many times a week 48 percent of you are getting it on. A lucky 1
percent said theyre doing it more than 10 times per week! (Who has that kind of time?)

Still havent found what youre looking for?


Maybe your Craigslist ad needs work
eronica Fitzhugh once asked a male respondee to one of her Craigslist ads why hed bothered answering when clearly she wasnt what he was looking for, and vice versa. Why didnt he just place his own ad? Hed tried that before, he said, and all he got was scams and prostitutes, and a lot of weird people. He wanted something specific, but didnt know how to get it. So she wrote an ad for him that adapted the I believe in the soul speech from Bull Durhamand it worked. He just wanted a fuck buddy, and I got him that, but first [he had] to be charming and relatable, she said. Thirty-three-year-old Fitzhugh met her first boyfriend via an AOL personals ad, her current boyfriend on OK Cupid, and had one of her best sexual experiences ever with someone who answered an ad she placed on Craigslist. Shes a true social networker, a Holly Golightly for the Internet generation. And, as someone whos actually been paid to write personal ads, shes in the perfect position to offer you some advice. The majority of the ads on Craigslist are crude and barely coherent, and theyre al-

February 7 13, 2012 c-ville.com 100% Recycled Paper

CRAMER PHOTO

Oh sheet! Veronica Fitzhugh knows just how to get you in bed.

most all written by men. When those men are looking for other men, the Ill show you mine, you show me yours strategy seems to work just fine. But when a man needs a woman, he has to try a little harder. Men, Fitzhugh says, usually make two mistakes. First, they complain about what theyre

not getting, and second, they graphically list what they want. She recommends that they instead focus on telling their prospective mate who they are. Simply informing a woman that you can perform cunniligus for days is unlikely to impress her. Women want to be seen as human beings, not fodder for your fetish.

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