Mr.

Santa Claus
I sent this letter out several years ago, but I chuckle any time I read it. I thought in the midst of the holiday bustle I would hopefully send you a chuckle for Christmas. Letter 377 from Uganda - Christmas time 2011 It has been reported that a person by the name of Mr. Santa Claus has been detained at the border town of Malaba (Kenya/Uganda), Uganda yesterday due to irregularities concerning his attempted entry into the country. The charges are numerous and complicated making it difficult to report the case accurately. From what we can tell, the following charges are pending further investigation:

Immigration

Mr. Claus does not seem to have a valid passport and cannot explain how he passed through Kenya or intended to enter Uganda. This is further complicated by the fact that Mr. Santa Claus was not carrying any form of identification. Though he claims to be known throughout the world, he cannot substantiate such a claim through documentation. Mr. Claus admits to having several aliases such as "Father Christmas", "Saint Nick", "Santa Claus", "Chris Krinkle" and other names in various countries around the world. This has thrown a shroud of suspicion around Mr. Claus. Mr. Santa Claus did not have the necessary $50 to pay for a temporary entry visa into Uganda.
Vehicle Registration

Mr. Santa Claus could not produce the required logbook (certificate of ownership) for his sleigh (an unusual mode of transportation by Ugandan standards). Such documentation, or a photocopy of the original, is necessary to obtain a temporary vehicle road license. Mr. Santa Claus threw the office into an uproar when he claimed that he would not be using the roads and therefore should not have to pay for a road license. He claimed he was going to fly between destinations. Mr. Claus could not produce the $20 required for his vehicle road license and could not explain adequately why his sleigh does not have a proper designation of engine capacity in cubic centimeters. Mr. Claus' vehicle does not have a proper engine number or chassis number to write on the government papers. Since such numbers help to verify ownership and identify stolen vehicles, police are closely monitoring Mr. Claus' statements and actions. Mr. Claus could not produce any insurance papers to show that his sleigh was covered by third party insurance for international travel. The required temporary insurance coverage while in Uganda would cost about $50, and Mr. Claus claims he does not have the money to purchase such coverage.
Airspace

 When Mr. Claus claimed he would be flying between destinations, government officials asked to see his pilot's license. Mr. Santa Claus claimed he did not have one and has never needed one since he began his work decades ago. Current charges include attempting to fly without a license. Mr. Santa Claus was also unable to produce documentation showing that his sleigh had safety clearance or had been registered with any aviation society in any country. This attempt to fly an illegal aircraft further complicates Mr. Claus' situation. Animal Importation The customs officials immediately impounded nine animals that are reputedly called reindeer for quarantine due to the possibility of infectious diseases. Mr. Claus could not produce any documentation showing that the animals have been vaccinated or were free from dangerous diseases that could devastate Uganda's domestic animal and wildlife populations. Local officials say the animals may need to be quarantined up to six weeks with all costs of housing and feeding being paid by Mr. Santa Claus. It is rumored that one of the reindeers has a suspicious looking red, glowing anomaly on his nose that worries local veterinarians who have been called in to assess the situation.
Customs

The largest and most serious offense committed by Mr. Santa Claus is the attempted importation of a huge inventory of toys and merchandise. Mr. Claus did not fill out any declaration forms identifying his cargo and as a result was arrested as an alleged smuggler of goods. More serious charges have been brought since Mr. Claus cannot produce either sales receipts showing he is the true owner of all the merchandise or market prices of the goods he is carrying. Customs officials, who have the power to assess value to all goods, are currently looking through their manuals to ascertain an estimated cost to all the goods Mr. Claus was carrying at the time of his detainment. An additional complication arose when Mr. Claus claimed to have actually made all the merchandise he was carrying together with his elfish companions and that he intended to distribute it freely to his friends in Uganda. Local officials considered his claim as dubious and have considered requesting the help of a psychiatrist from Kampala to help in the case. If customs officials seek payment for all the goods on the sleigh, Mr. Claus' bill could run into the millions of shillings. Mr. Claus did receive unexpected support from the local medicine men who are leaders in the Association of Traditional Medicine. They said Mr. Claus' claim of flying to destinations and having elf friends could be true since they themselves have experienced such transportation techniques and have met unusual beings. The Kenyan government has already informed the Ugandan border officials that they will not allow Mr. Claus to return to their country since he does not have proper documentation. It seems Mr. Claus may be trapped between countries, without papers, without money to pay for his merchandise, and without proper documents for his sleigh and animals. Government officials in Kampala have been notified of the problem. In the meantime, Mr. Claus remains in custody until officials can determine what needs to be done.

Reported by Shawn Tyler