Amanda Picotte Philosophy and Feminism Research Paper, Fall 2010 Non-Violent Rape and its Cultural Endorsement

Rape, like all forms of exploitation, is concomitant with a denial of human rights. Women are denied the right to autonomy and to full independence under the oppression of phallocentric patriarchy. If we observe human rights as something inherently natural rather than something easily granted and denied, then the historical and current experiences of women displays repeated denial by men of women as fully deserving of the rights all humans are considered born with. The incessant denial of human rights to this group makes it clear that patriarchy has not recognized women as fully human. Through perpetuated notions that women are objects of mens sexual desires; through notions that women should assume roles which aid in preserving male dominance, women are reduced to beings not fully deserving of all the rights and privileges men are entitled to. So long as cultural institutions maintain the normalcy of this dynamic, women and men will be socialized into their respective roles. At this point in time within our Western society, sexism is perpetuated most pervasively by our popular culture and media rather than other institutions, such as religion and law.1 Through media outlets, aomen are repeatedly told that they are beings to be assessed and prized for their sexual worth. This perspective sustains the notion that women must conform to certain behaviors and posses certain physical characteristics in order to become socially validated. Because there is the culturally held notion that women should be passive, beautiful, nurturing, sexy beings; women find that they must

The placement of emphasis on popular culture and media does not seek to discount other cultural artifacts of patriarchy, but seeks to address a sphere which has not been fully combatted by the advancements of feminism.
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conform to these ideals in order to sustain the approval of men in order to advance within patriarchy. The power dynamic created by gender hierarchy additionally maintains the culturally accepted notion that men have a natural right to women and their bodies. All of the social pressures created by womens objectification affect womens view of self and ultimately the role they assume during intercourse. Due to its nature and social implications, sex carries the potential to be an act of overt male dominance. In a society which primarily values women as sex objects, consent during intercourse is not immune to social pressures influencing a womans actions. Rape is a cultural artifact bound tightly with gender hierarchy, causing intercourse to be exploitative as long as the woman does not feel she owns her sexuality--so long as the woman is not recognized as independent of societys gender power structure. Intercourse will be rape as long as the male partner views sex as a form of attainment, of acquisition even if the two partners have been intimate previously. If the male partner is incapable of recognizing his socially dominant position he then fails to recognize the power he brought along into the sexual encounter. The failure to remove these entitlements and pretenses results in the category I refer to as non-violent rape. This term may easily seem like an oxymoron, but what prevents the concept from being such is its attempt to bridge between the already socially acknowledged violent abuse and the dramatically unrecognized manifestations of sexual violation. When the female partners sexuality is actualized and personalized, when it becomes free from the need of social validation attached to sexual desirability, the dynamic between the couple has begun to actively disempower patriarchy on a personal level. As a woman, a realization of this power is revolutionary. It is counter to all pervading messages received since a child. Liberation from the

oppressive constraints placed upon female sexuality can only serve to improve sexual encounters and formulate a stronger sense of self worth. For men, this realization will free them from the impersonality of purely physical sexual encounters--there is more to gain from intercourse than a climax! Sex should be a shared experience between two beings, and should be appreciated as an act beyond animalism, as an almost spiritual, egalitarian act of sensual exploration. Required for this to happen is a shift in perspective counter to the distribution of power of societys gender hierarchy. Rape is always about power. With that said, in instances of heterosexual intercourse, when the woman is coerced by either the male partner or by cultural pressures, then she has been entered as a non-autonomous, objectified being, and she has been raped. Intercourse predicated upon cultural pressures fails to recognize the individual. The female actor is reduced to a being of desire which caters to the male partner. This objectification culturally permits entering the woman regardless of her freedom of individuality. This implies that rape is not only a physical violation; it is the institutional stripping away of independence and dignity through intercourse. However, there is a fine line here. I believe that Andrea Dworkin was wrong when she stated that violation is a synonym for intercourse. In her essay, Occupation/ Collaboration, she makes the claim that all intercourse and all penetration is an abuse which eroticizes powerlessness. 2 This is false because I believe that there is the capability for transcendence of cultural oppressions in a sexual relationship. Women are capable of gaining power, determination, sexuality for their own sake. Because of this, women are capable of entering into sexual relationships aware of their position, and claim the act as their own. It is also

Dworkin, Andrea, Intercourse (New York: The Free Press, 1987), 122

possible to engage in intercourse with a man who endorses womens freedom from social drives towards engaging in sex. It is possible that on an individual level non-violent rape can be avoided, the gendered power dynamic to be diffused. To further elucidate in what ways intercourse can and cannot be instances of rape, consider these three stories. This first story is about Sophia and Michael. Sophia is a young woman in school and is an acquaintance of Michael's. The two have been flirtatious with one another, yet not exclusively, for about a week. Sophia is excited by the attention shes receiving from Michael since he is considered to be one of the more attractive men on campus, and being recognized by him must mean shes an incredibly beautiful woman. Sophias views on sex are simple: she sees the act as a fun thing to do with someone she finds attractive. If she can get the sexiest guy she feels (consciously and subconsciously) she will earn more respect not only with her female friends, but within the male community as well. Her promiscuity validates her within her social network as an attractive, sexy, fun-loving individual, and this behavior is normal within her peer group. Michael carries similar views. To him, a good night out must include getting laid by an attractive woman. His peer group endorses this behavior and glorifies those within the group for getting the hottest babe. One evening Michael calls Sophia over to his room to hang out. This meeting very quickly evolves into a consensual sexual encounter. This hookup is an instance of non-violent rape because of the social pressures and cultural expectations dictating to Sophia what she must consent to in order to be a viable member of her social network. Their intercourse validated Sophia as a thing capable of being objectified by a man of great status, thus perpetuating oppressive sexual perspectives while playing into societys gender hierarchy. To Michael, Sophia was an acquired object meant to not only please him, but to maintain his social

position among his peers. While Sophia and Michael mutually objectified each other, it was Sophia who ultimately was violated. This is due to the preexisting social power dynamic which immediately placed Sophia in a subordinate position to Michael. This position serves to only benefit Michaels sexual pleasure and reinforces him within the patriarchal framework. Story number two is of Lisa and Paul. Lisa and Paul are both seventeen years old and the two have been dating for a few months. Lisa has been apprehensive to have sex with Paul, though she has strong feelings for him. During one heated and passionate interaction, Paul yet again asks Lisa to have sex. Lisa does not feel ready, but is having a hard time admitting this to Paul. She knows he really wants to have sex, and she knows that he has strong feelings for her too. In Lisas mind, she is debating between finally consenting to make him happy, or to yet again tell him sorry, but no. Lisa feels bad due to all of the times she has denied Paul sex, and begins to feel that it is unfair that she has let this much time go by without letting him have sex with her. Lisa consents and the two have intercourse. Though Lisa and Paul are more committed to each other and are more sensitive to one anothers emotional well being than Sophia and Michael, Lisa and Pauls sexual encounter was not capable of escaping social pressures amounting to Lisas consent. Both Lisa and Paul had not unlearned phallocentricism. Lisa had not felt socially comfortable with the idea of claiming her sexuality as her own, and Paul had not come to accept Lisas apprehension as equal to or of higher priority than his sexual desires. The third story is of Carmen and Aaron. Carmen and Aaron have been together for a few months. Carmen made it a priority that before she and Aaron engaged in intercourse that they both establish their awareness of the power dynamic instilled within their relationship because of socially perpetuated sexist notions. Both Carmen and Aaron understood the profound importance

of having each sexual encounter be an egalitarian one where both of their sexualities (especially Carmens) is fully realized. In accounting for the social pressures for and endorsements of phallocentric intercourse, both Carmen and Aaron are working to eliminate heterosexist perceptions of sex from entering into their relationship through their dialogue of these issues. The active stripping away of power disparity in both their daily and erotic lives has taken the forefront of their relationship and the maintenance of this equality is one of the foundational aspects of their relationship.

Our societys gender hierarchy is not primarily responsible for the pervasiveness of nonviolent rape. Though power inequality may direct the trends of our culture, it is primarily cultural outlets which mold our sense of identity, thereby aiding us in fitting into our gendered roles. Cultural sexism socializes individuals into assuming roles necessary for the perpetuation of rape. This is applicable even in violent cases defined legally as forced penetration against the womans will. As Susan Brownmiller examines in her book Against Our Will, there are ubiquitous narratives of the docile and defenseless woman being saved by the heroic and kindly man cropping up in various cultural channels.3 Brownmiller discusses an interview she read with Hollywood movie director, Alfred Hitchcock, where he was asked what qualities were important when choosing a lead actress. The quality he preferred most, over any other trait was vulnerability. 4 His choice is telling of the ideal popular culture holds for women. What makes this an appealing characteristic lies in the fact that vulnerable women are easily had, won, or possessed, fulfilling the phallocentric fantasy of sex as conquest. The female
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Brownmiller, Susan Against Our Will (New York: Simon and Schuster, 1975) 310. ibid. 333-334

embodiment of strength, wisdom, and detachment are not widely portrayed in celluloid. Rather, these traits are reserved for male characters while the women remain passive, sexy, young and dependent. These roles have remained true throughout the history of media and into today even with the progress feminism has made concerning womanhood and how it is portrayed. In our daily lives, we encounter various forms of media continuously. These omnipresent images and corresponding messages play to our innermost insecurities and teach us what it is to be culturally acceptable. So often behavior becomes modeled after what we see on television. We find ourselves able to identify with the characters in movies. Cultural norms and trends evolve out of what we see on the screen. When an institution with such power chronically represents women in a subordinate, sexed manner, it is easy to see television, movies and film acting as a source of cultural reinforcement of, what Brownmiller calls, the beautiful victim; women as prizes whose significance is determined by sexual vulnerability. It is important to discuss the media and our cultures depictions of women because from the time we are very young, we receive messages from many different entities about how we as women should behave, and why. We should be beautiful and accessible to men. Finding a strong, handsome man is one of our biggest achievements as a women. The creation of these characteristics also shapes the way in which the two genders interact. Since rape is about power, it is important to examine the ways in which power is either granted or denied to the genders. It is also important to recognize the ways in which our culture and popular culture help to prop up and maintain sex oppression. Feminism has made great progress at confronting systemic discrimination against women and their legal rights pursuing rape cases. While those atrocities have been brought to the fore, one area which remains barely touched is an active discourse on

the cultural reevaluation of sexual values. If we are to confront rape holistically, then we must also confront social attitudes concerning sex. It is easy to pinpoint sections of our culture which endorse sexist notions. However, it is more challenging to find aspects of our culture which sanction discourse on sexual empowerment. As she so eloquently put it in her article Seduced by Violence No More, bell hooks states: one major obstacle preventing us from transforming rape culture is that heterosexual women have not unlearned a heterosexist-based eroticism that constructs desire in such a way that many of us can only respond erotically to male behavior that has already been coded as masculine within the sexist framework.5 This precisely articulates the idea that many women are not aware of their sexual oppression. We are kept unaware by the inescapable dialogue emphasizing the importance of sexiness, passivity, and beauty without realizing that those traits must be maintained for patriarchal reasons.6 Without an open dialogue of feminist perspectives, womens realization of self is limited to the perspective offered by men. Hooks goes on in her article to call out to women to reassess what they desire in men as a means of active protest against sexism. By actively rejecting men who embody hyper-masculinity and define their masculinity by their conquest of women, women will be able to experience the empowerment which comes along with regaining sexual control. This directly relates to rape culture and non-violent rape. As active members of a sexist society, if we choose to decenter phallocentrism from our erotic lives then we are disempowering patriarchy and dismantling support for the eroticization of female subordination. While encompassing phallocentric intercourse within the definition of rape, it is possible

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hooks, bell Seduced by Violence No More (Minneapolis: Milkweed Editions, 1993) 334

Look back to the example of Sophia in her engagement with Michael and why that engagement was a form of sexual exploitation for her.

to water-down perceptions of violent and brutal rape cases. Perhaps if rape were to be defined as I suggest, then the act could more easily be dismissed because it is so widespread that it looses its significance. I hope that this is not the case, but instead rape becomes recognized as a of type of actions. With this, I hope that individuals will become more cognizant of sexisms grip on our intimate lives. What unifies non-violent rape and the torture which makes news headlines is the exertion of male supremacy actualized through the physical violation of a womans body. The reason for associating non-violent rape with rape is to bring awareness to the prevalence of the eroticization of oppression within our sexual lives and through our cultural outlets. Addressing the notion that rape is not limited to back alleys, but rather includes mens sense of entitlement over womens bodies forces all men to reevaluate their impact on female oppression.