To look within for the actual source of love leads to the discovery of the Self.

Like the sun, the Self is ever present, unconditional, and not subject to thought, opinion, or attitude. The Self can only love because that is its essence. The love of the Self is not earned, deserved, or subject to limitation. The Self is the source of life and the subjective awareness of existence. --I: Reality and Subjectivity, pg. 93 Dr. David R. Hawkins What does it mean to look within for the source of Love? In every action that we do, it's possible to notice that there seems to be a part of ourselves that is the beneficiary of the action. This is the part that we normally identify as ourselves. There is also the benefactor, the one that gives the action to the beneficiary. As I write this, I notice a part of me that is striving to come up with examples to illustrate this point. At the same time, there is an underlying aspect of my being that comprises the deeper desires that bring me here in the first place: the desire to share with others a sense of peace and the unlimited will to give. It is this part that brings the body to the computer and engages the mind in brainstorming examples. What's occurring within you as you read this? Probably there's a part of you that is reading these words and analyzing them, deciding how and if they apply to your life, if it's worth continuing to read them, how you're feeling and reacting as you do so, etc. At the same time, you may be aware of a deeper part of yourself that is responding to your desire to grow, to learn, to use your time well and so on. Often, becoming aware of this deeper part and focusing on it is more satisfying than the desire that we were originally concerned with. We all seek happiness. The spectrum of human consciousness can be organized and arranged in a hierarchy according to the form of happiness that we seek. From the craving for survival, the relief of pain and physical pleasure no matter what, humans gradually grow to desire emotional relationships, creative expression and beauty, to give, to love, to be good and true. As the forms of happiness become more abstract, they converge. If we believe our sages and mystics, the ultimate happiness is then found in the most exalted expressions of love and the awareness of the underlying unity of all of creationthe realization of the Divine. Present even at the lowest levels, the same ever-giving aspect of the self orchestrates the fulfillment of even the basest desires. Recognizing this when we're possessed by such desires can catapult us out of them and return us to identifying with the source of love within. Using Dr. Hawkins' Map of Consciousness as a guide, we can explore how the source of love informs each of the emotional states. The lowest state mentioned on this map is Shame, in which a person feels primarily humiliation and may passively or actively pursue their own death. Even a person who is suffering from suicidal depression may experience relief if he can pay attention to the underlying motivations beneath his thoughts. A person may desire death because of the pain that he is feeling and the belief that no benefit to anyone can come from continued life. At the same time however, a part of this person is demonstrating compassion for his suffering and it is for this reason that it's offering what appears like a solutionoblivion. The voice of shame is painfully aware of how a person's life is possibly contributing to the suffering of others, as well as himself. In a sense there is a compassion here, a desire for others to be happy and at peace, even if that peace will come from this person's absence. A person doesn't need to be suicidal to benefit from transmuting the depressing inner voices into an awareness of love. No matter what they say

or how they say it, it's possible to discover an underlying compassion, a desire for the happiness of the individual and others. It is always this part of the self that cries out against the pain that the individual is feeling and seeks to provide a solution. When we focus on this yearning, we are already freed from the conditions that prompted it. If we learn to return to this focus and to maintain it, then we will discover the freedom that is our birthright. A common response to the description above is skepticism. It seems incredible or even ridiculous to imagine that amidst the worst forms of emotional pain there is any semblance of love present, let alone an unconditionally loving, wise and caring aspect of the self. It's even more difficult to believe that this aspect is always there and available. Yet this constant loving presence is our true identity and a simple illustration will demonstrate this. The voice of skepticism is itself an example of this loving presence. The voice of skepticism comes to protect us, to shield us from disappointment, from investing our hope in something that may prove untrue and leave us even more disheartened. Even if heeding the voice of skepticism might prevent us from great healing and growth, this part of ourselves is so concerned with our current emotional state that it strives to maintain what is known and familiar. It desires to keep us safe. Can we recognize the love behind its words? As this process is engaged, it grows in power. Emotional states that may have tortured us in the past are unraveled as they are revealed to be expressions of the source of love within. The next stage on Dr. Hawkins' Map of Consciousness is Guilt. A person experiencing guilt often directs the negative energy outwards and may be extremely destructive. The internal voices of guilt can be overwhelming and oppressive. Yet in essence they are saying, I want you to be better, to improve, to grow and stop causing others (and yourself) so much pain. I want you to feel bad so that you will be inspired to change. It may not seem like the most effective way of communicating on the surface, but beneath the words is a loving intention. The voice of guilt implies the hope for a better life, for wisdom and the ability to do good. If we can turn our attention to this hope then we will discover within us the resources we need to heal. Above guilt is Apathy, a state of hopeless despair in which a person is often overcome with indifference and inaction. Beneath the posture of disinterest however, there is a protective force similar to that present when a person is feeling skepticism. This part of the self is concerned about disappointment, about expending effort to little or no effect and the possibility of experiencing a new and improved state of being only to suddenly return to the current or an even lower state. This concern demonstrates compassion. It is the outgrowth of a deep aspect of our own identity that desires our safety and continued comfort. While we're immersed in debilitating states of consciousness it may be difficult or almost impossible to leave them through contemplation alone. There may be times when the only effort we can manage is fervent prayer or deep surrender to G-d. As long as we're able to do so however, cultivating an awareness of the love that girds and fuels all other emotional states may make it easier to transcend them. Beyond apathy is Grief, where the loss of a particular person, relationship, accomplishment or object is associated with despondency and tragedy. The sadness we feel is an expression of the value that we attached to what we've lost. Thus, beneath this sadness is an awareness of how precious the object was to us, and an accompanying desire that we would still possess or be able to relate to the lost object. If we focus on this awareness we'll discover an immeasurable love. It is this love within us that wishes for us to have all forms of fulfillment, especially that which we associated with what is now gone. The intensity of our sadness is commensurate with the intensity of our appreciation. Focusing on the loss, we directly

experience the sadness. Focusing on the desire within us to be united with what we've lost, we discover compassion. Without any thought of creating it, there is a part of us that yearns for our happiness. It is constantly with us and it is the loving source of all of our emotions, which we continue to experience until we're ready to recognize their origin. Rising from grief one may experience Fear. Fear comprises all the anxieties that we may experience. The ultimate root of all of them is the fear of death, the imagined possibility of non-existence. Related to the fear of death is the fear of pain and discomfort or some form of suffering in the afterlife. Behind every fear, the source of love within us is expressing concern for our comfort, survival and spiritual well-being. Every fear points towards the desire to be free from fear, to have no reason to be afraid. In every moment there is a part of ourselves that wishes for us to have this freedom. This wish stems from our essence, which if examined, will prove to be completely without fear. Why is the source of love within us unafraid? As soon as we explore this question we are no longer caught in our fear. When we recognize the source of love within as who we truly are, we are free. Beyond fear is Desire, the craving for something external to the self. This craving can be for a person or relationship, a material object, a physical, emotional or spiritual sensation, or even for continued existence itself. Practically anything can become fixated upon and craved as a source of happiness. As with all emotions, the source of love within is present behind every desire. It is the overarching part of us that wishes for us to have the fulfillment and satisfaction that we think will come from what we crave. It would want us to feel as if we had everything, as if all of our needs and wants were met. As we pay attention to this part of ourselves, we discover that while it would want us to feel completely fulfilled, it itself is free from desiring. It simply is, and the more that we become aware of it, the more we're conscious of an unconditional and unlimited happiness within us. This is the ground of our being, our original self. When desire is frustrated, the result is often Anger. Ultimately anger can be present whenever we want reality to be different from how it is. This can include wanting people to be different from how they are, situations to work out differently, our own personality to have different traits or greater competencies, and so on. Any instance in which we would prefer reality to be different from what it is can be a catalyst for anger. Because anger so often follows desire, it's simple to identify the underlying motive or yearning that flows from the source of love within. Often we want people to be better in some way: more punctual, more polite, more sensitive, more aware. The list could be endless. In every case however, there is the loving desire that we should have a more pleasant encounter or interaction. Part of our being yearns for us to feel the most perfect satisfaction and contentment. This is the wellspring of compassion within us and it is present beneath even the most overwhelming rage. Above anger is the emotional state of Pride, in which a person feels disdain and scorn. A person suffering from pride feels the need to be validated in the eyes of others. There is a desire to be proven right, to demonstrate one's intelligence, goodness, skill, wisdom, power or other virtue, even if the virtue isn't as manifest as it may seem. Other people's appraisal is valued more than the attainment of virtue itself. Like all desiring, seeking happiness outside of the Self is a recipe for dissatisfaction and disappointment. As we grow we internalize this truth. In the meantime, from a place of love, the Self gives us the feeling of pride.