Marriage Throughout the Bible

from "From Saul to Paul Ministries" by SaultoPaul

John 15:13 Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends. Ephesians 5:25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; Ephesians 5:32 This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church. Before anything, ask yourself "How would Christ treat His Church this way or how would the Church treat Christ this way?"

The Husband
The Husband as defined by the bible Husband - Defined as - a married man. [O.E. Husbonda - a man of the house.] Husband<G435> an'-ayr a primary word [compare <G444> (anthropos)]; a man (properly as an individual male) :- fellow, husband, man, sir. Genesis 3:6 And when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make one wise, she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave also unto her husband with her; and he did eat. Note: From the time of Adam to our dictionary, the definition of husband, has seriously changed. So what is the bibles definition of a husband? The definition of husband starts with Genesis 2:23 " And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man". Think about it for a minute and read verses 21-25 to get the full picture. These verses are the very institution of marriage which make him a husband. God has taken a part of him to make his wife and "they shall be one flesh". So let's look at the word "ONE" - This word "one" is the same word as the word "first" in Genesis 1:5 "...And the morning and the evening was the first day" . It is like taking an apple

and cutting in half. Each half is still an apple and cutting in half did not change what it is but an apple. The same in Genesis 2:21 "...and he(God) took one of his(Adams) rib..." and they did not become one body BUT ONE FLESH. So he is the very part of her and she is the very part of him. I will refer back to this several times in this chapter.

1. Genesis 3:6 And when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make one wise, she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave also unto her husband<H376> with her; and he did eat. 2. Genesis 16:3 And Sarai Abram's wife took Hagar her maid the Egyptian, after Abram had dwelt ten years in the land of Canaan, and gave her to her husband<H376> Abram to be his wife. 3. Genesis 20:4 But God came to Abimelech in a dream by night, and said to him, Behold, thou art but a dead man, for the woman which thou hast taken; for she is a man's<H1167> wife <H1166>. 4. Deuteronomy 21:13 And she shall put the raiment of her captivity from off her, and shall remain in thine house, and bewail her father and her mother a full month: and after that thou shalt go in unto her, and be her husband<H1166>, and she shall be thy wife. Note for 1 and 2: In number 1 and 2 above the word husband was defined as below. Husband<H376> eesh Transliteration: sh: English Words used in KJV: man 1002, men 210, one 188, husband 69, any 27, misc 143, [Total Count: 1639] Note for 3 and 4: In number 3 and 4 above the word husband changed to be defined as below. Husband<H1166> baw-al' Transliteration: bal English Words used in KJV: marry 8, husband 3, dominion 2, wife 1, married wife 1, Beulah 1 [Total Count: 16] a primitive root; to be master; hence (as denominative from <H1167> (ba`al)) to marry: - have dominion (over), be husband, marry (-ried, wife).

Note: In notes 1 and 2 husband was the transliteration "sh" and the word women was the transliteration: "ishsh" feminine of <H376>. This term for husband was like saying man and woman. If you search the Hebrew number <H376> you will get an understanding of that and how it is used. If you study the time the Lord changed the name of Abram to Abraham and the promise of a great nation, it changed the word husband to <H1166> transliteration: "bal" . So as the definition changed so did the responsibilities change and in 1 Peter 3:6 "Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement". Peter did not refer to Abram but Abraham because he was the father of nation. Isaiah 54:5 "For thy Maker is thine husband<H1166>; the LORD of hosts is his name; and thy Redeemer the Holy One of Israel; The God of the whole earth shall he be called". The Lord was not going to use the word husband <H376> "eesh" for His title but the Lord was going to use this use of the word husband <H1166> "baw-al'" for His title. Once God made a covenant in Gen. 17:6 "Neither shall thy name any more be called Abram, but thy name shall be Abraham; for a father of many nations have I made thee". what changed was Abraham became a father of the nation Israel and the husbands meaning as a husband. God is the husband to the bride Israel like Christ is with the church. Now husbands are to their wives as the Lord is to Israel and Christ to the church. It is about responsibility to your wives as a husband and how they are treated as far as wives are concerned. A husband is to conduct himself with his wife as Christ conducts Himself to His Church. This will be taken step by step through this chapter as I go through each one of these. H - Honesty U - Understanding S - Security B - Blameless A - Authority N - Nourish (to cherish and to tend to) D - Devoted S - Sexuality H - Is for Honesty Proverbs 13:5 A righteous man hateth lying: but a wicked man is loathsome, and cometh to shame.

1 Timothy 2:2 For kings, and for all that are in authority; that we may lead a quiet and peaceable life in all godliness and honesty. Note: The word honesty here is the same as "gravity" in 1 Tim. 3:4 and in Tit 2:7. There is no difference between a Christian and a husband other than one is married. The character of all Christians are the same whither they are men or women. This is part of the commandments that Jesus taught in Matt. 22:37-40 and Matt. 5:43-48 "For if ye love them which love you, what reward have ye? do not even the publicans the same?" and that everyone is your neighbor. So if you are honest with your neighbor than how much more are you to be honest with your wife? Someone once told me that you do not tell your wife everything. To a point, that is true, you don't have to tell her what you have done every minute of the day but that was not what he meant. No, you do not have to go through your whole life's history with her all at once but she should not have any doubts about knowing who you are as a person and if she asks THEN YOU TELL HER LIKE IT IS. In time, with quiet talks together , she will as much about you as you know about her.

U - Is for Understanding Psalm 119:34 Give me understanding, and I shall keep thy law; yea, I shall observe it with my whole heart. Colossians 1:10 For this cause we also, since the day we heard it, do not cease to pray for you, and to desire that ye might be filled with the knowledge of his will in all wisdom and spiritual understanding; Note: Husbands should be understanding with everyone and more so with their wife. In Gen. 1:27, Matt. 19:4 and Mark 10:6 that God created them "male and female" in His own image. Husbands should also understand that they are male and females are different from one another. Their understanding, moods, emotions and the way they women think are different from a man's way of thinking. Sometimes it is hard for women to be understanding with women because of their moods and likewise for men when they are in their logical moods. The husband, as well as, the wife should greatly take this into consideration. So husbands, be as understand as Christ is understand with His church. Even couples argue and disagree but do it with love in your hearts and not bitterness to her.

S -Is for Security Nehemiah 4:15 And I looked, and rose up, and said unto the nobles, and to the rulers, and to the rest of the people, Be not ye afraid of them: remember the Lord, which is great and terrible, and fight for your brethren, your sons, and your daughters, your wives, and your houses. Note: As Christians we put our security in Jesus Christ and just as Christ secured us from the penalty of death we should also protect our wife to the best of our wisdom and knowledge. In Psalm 34:15 "The eyes of the LORD are upon the righteous, and his ears are open unto their cry" and as the Lord hears our cry so should we as husbands hear the cries of our wives. In Prov. 4:6 "Forsake her not, and she shall preserve thee: love her, and she shall keep thee" and in Prov. 4:8 "Exalt her, and she shall promote thee: she shall bring thee to honour, when thou dost embrace her". We cannot always be there for our wives but NEVER, EVER give her the cold shoulder when she is in need of it. ESPECIAL, when you are upset with her and this happens because we are human in our nature. This is not natural or the Apostle Paul would not have made it a command to love your wives. B - Is for Blameless Philippians 2:15 That ye may be blameless and harmless, the sons of God, without rebuke, in the midst of a crooked and perverse nation, among whom ye shine as lights in the world; Note: Paul was speaking of the obligations of deacons, bishops or a pastors. These are the leaders of the church to teach Christians. We cannot be perfect by any imagination and in Ecc. 7:20 "For there is not a just man upon earth, that doeth good, and sinneth not". In 1 Cor. 11:1 "Be ye followers of me, even as I also am of Christ", Paul speaks of setting our goals to be Christ like. It is so much of his past for even the Apostle Paul had a very dark past as Saul but his Christian life should be blameless. Some Christians screw in their lives so God can teach them a very important lesson in life to bring them back on the right path. A Christian should be judged by his present and NOT his past. A - Is for Authority Genesis 3:16 Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.

Ephesians 5:23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. 1 Timothy 2:2 For kings, and for all that are in authority; that we may lead a quiet and peaceable life in all godliness and honesty.

Note: In Eph. 5:23 "For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body". Rule a primitive root; to rule :- (have, make to have) dominion, governor, indeed, reign, (bear, cause to, have) rule (-ing, -r), have power. Authority from <G5247> (huperecho); prominence, i.e. (figurative) superiority (in rank or character) :authority, excellency. Head probably from the primary kapto (in the sense of seizing); the head (as the part most readily taken hold of), literal or figurative :- head. English Words used in KJV: rule 38, ruler 19, reign 8, dominion 7, governor 4, ruled over 2, power 2 and indeed 1 [Total Count: 81] Authority as in the since rank but not so in character for both husband and wife are to be of Christian character. In Genesis 3:16, God gave the husband "authority" to "rule" over the over the wife. Therefore a WARNING to a husband not to abuse this authority to rule over his wife was also given to the husband. Now there are ways to misuse this authority and when you do abuse it, you sin against Christ. If a husband treats his wife in any way that he himself does not want to be treated then that is abusing your authority as a husband. A husband is the head of the wife and was given that authority by God but with GREAT responsibility to be Christ like to his wife and on less. When it comes to her protecting her, he will cover as a shield to protect her as in Eph. 5:25 "Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it". The authority over the church was a loving one. In Rev 3:19 the apostle John writes about Christ and the church that "As many as I love, I rebuke and chasten: be zealous therefore, and repent".

N - Is to Nourish and cherish or love 1 Corinthians 13:1-3 1 Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal. 2 And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing. 3 And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing. Ephesians 5:25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;

Ephesians 5:28 So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. Note: The Apostle Paul, in Corinthians, is speak of the power of gifts and how great is the gift of love. I one can do all these things and has not love than it is all for nothing. So relate those gift to your wife and IT IS NO DIFFERENT. A husband can do all things with his wife but without love IT IS NOTHING. So if you do things for a wife because a husband feels that he has to do it than it is for nothing. A person can argue the Paul was talking about gift to the Corinthians but LOVE IS LOVE. I can say safely that a great deal of husbands do not know the powerful responsibility in THE COMMAND to love his wife as Christ loved his church. The Son of God came down, leaving the glory of heaven, to live as a man. After thirty-three, Christ was beat to a bloody pulp and nailed to the cross to be hung between heaven and earth. Christ done this for His church and all believers. So when you read Ephesians 5:25, read it with the power that Christ put in that verse as He hung from that cross. D - Is for Dedicated or enthusiastic Ephesians 5:2 2 And walk in love, as Christ also hath loved us, and hath given himself for us an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweetsmelling savour. Note: I chose this verse to show the dedication a husband should have for his wife and to be dedicated to walk side by side in love and harmony throughout the marriage. A husband should walk in that dedication of love from the first day throughout their whole lives until in death do they part. As much as Christ dedicated His life to Christians and His church, so should the husbands also dedicate their lives to their wives. Not only when she is happy but also to be there to comfort her in times of emotional needs. It all goes back to one verse in Gen. 2:22 "And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the

man". If the husband is not dedicated to his wife than he is not dedicated to himself or to the Lord because she has become a part of him. S - Is for Sexuality (It is the forbidden subject that no one speaks of) AND WHY NOT! Song Solomon 1:5 Draw me, we will run after thee: the king hath brought me into his chambers: we will be glad and rejoice in thee, we will remember thy love more than wine: the upright love thee. Song Solomon 7:2 Thy navel is like a round goblet, which wanteth not liquor: thy belly is like an heap of wheat set about with lilies. Note: Here is where some Christians close their bible and say to them "I did not see that". In Gen. 3:16 "and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee" and in Song. 7:10 "I am my beloved's, and his desire is toward me". God created us with this purpose in mind and as our nature is evil because of the fall but God's purpose is purely righteous. Adam and Eve went from "not ashamed" to being "afraid" in a matter of verses. In Genesis 2:25 "And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed". One very important thing to look for is that this verse was before the fall as seen in Genesis 3:10 "And he said, I heard thy voice in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was naked; and I hid myself". The question is now, does this make what God made wrong because of the fall? Absolutely not, according to the Song of Solomon but mankind in his fall has polluted what God made pure. To make matters worse, the devil is using our human nature to corrupt us in thinking that it is our dark side and turn God's gift into something it should not be. The word belly<H990> from an unused root probably meaning to be hollow; the belly, especially the womb; also the bosom or body of anything :- belly, body, + as they be born, + within, womb. What is on the belly that is like a "heap of wheat" and he is writing about the woman. God knows how important it is because God created it for us to enjoy. Most pastors will not even touch the subject on a Sunday or any other time.

1 Corinthians 7:4 The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife. 1 Corinthians 7:5 Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency. 1 Corinthians 7:4 Amplified Bible For the wife does not have [exclusive] authority and control over her own body, but the husband [has his rights]; likewise also the husband does not have [exclusive] authority and control over his body, but the wife [has her rights]. 1 Corinthians 7: 5 Amplified Bible Do not refuse and deprive and defraud each other [of your due marital rights], except perhaps by mutual consent for a time, so that you may devote yourselves unhindered to prayer. But

afterwards resume marital relations, lest Satan tempt you [to sin] through your lack of restraint of sexual desire. Note: This is one of the most overlooked verses in the bible and almost never addressed by pastors in the church. It is also the one of the most misunderstood verses in the bible. It is talking about our sexual desires in the marriage and that it is a gift from a most Holy God and should be treated as such. I will refer back to Genesis 3:10 "..I was afraid, because I was naked; and I hid myself" and the first question God ask was "who told thee that thou wast naked". Do this change the gift of God from Genesis 2:25 to Genesis 3:10 ? Not according to the Word of God and what the Apostle Paul is teaching about marriage and Paul is very clear about it. This is a WARNING from the Apostle Paul that so many times couple get angry with each other to the point of using the withholding of natural desires to hurt one another. This is NOT something that I read but I have seen this done when couples argue with each other. Besides, my dad as a pastor has counseled lots of couples on this very subject. That the subject of sex itself is a subject that Christian couple really struggle within their marriages even today. Hebrews 13:4 Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.

Hebrews 13:4 Amplified Bible Let marriage be held in honor (esteemed worthy, precious, of great price, and especially dear) in all things. And thus let the marriage bed be undefiled (kept undishonored); for God will judge and punish the unchaste [all guilty of sexual vice] and adulterous. Note: This is how important the marriage and the bed is to each other. Make your marriage as God meant a marriage to be for Adam and Eve before the fall. I know that this is one of the most difficult subject to deal with and most churches do not even touch the subject just because they are afraid to step on someone toes in their congregation of their church. The best place to teach the subject would be in a Sunday School class with women teaching the women and the men teaching the men. Also, a well experienced couple, teaching newly married couples in a class of their own. TO MAKE MYSELF VERY CLEAR, I am not talking about sex education by no means of the imagination. I am talking about teaching men how to love their wives and wives how to respect their husbands according to the Word of God. Responsibility of the Husband To Teach Genesis 3:16 Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.

1 Corinthians 14:35 And if they will learn any thing, let them ask their husbands at home: for it is a shame for women to speak in the church. He shall - Rule<H4910> English Words used in KJV: rule 38, ruler 19, reign 8, dominion 7, governor 4, ruled over 2, power 2, indeed 1 [Total Count: 81] Deuteronomy 6:7 And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up. Note: The teaching of the wife should start in the home and with the husband. The bible study should start at the home with the family. Husbands are commanded to teach their wives and fathers are commanded to teach the children at home. I have more on the family in the chapter Fathers and Mothers. This chapter is mainly for husbands and wives in a marriage to strengthens their relationship in Christ. This happens in most cases but there are times when the wife teaches the husband. There is nothing wrong with this and this will be taught in full deal later in this chapter under the wife part in the marriage. To work and provide Genesis 2:5 And every plant of the field before it was in the earth, and every herb of the field before it grew: for the LORD God had not caused it to rain upon the earth, and there was not a man to till the ground. Genesis 2:15 And the Lord God took the man, and put him into the garden of Eden to dress it and to keep it. Exodus 9:1 Then the Lord said unto Moses, Go in unto Pharaoh, and tell him, Thus saith the Lord God of the Hebrews, Let my people go, that they may serve me. Exodus 20:9 Six days shalt thou labour, and do all thy work: Psalm 100:2 2 Serve the Lord with gladness: come before his presence with singing. Proverbs 28:19 19 He that tilleth his land shall have plenty of bread: but he that followeth after vain persons shall have poverty enough. Ecclesiastes 5:9 Moreover the profit of the earth is for all: the king himself is served by the field.

Ecclesiastes 5:12 The sleep of a labouring man is sweet, whether he eat little or much: but the abundance of the rich will not suffer him to sleep. [man is one of the miscellaneous translation used] English Words used in KJV: serve 227, do 15, till 9, servant 5, work 5, worshippers 5, service 4, dress 2, labour 2, ear 2 and miscellaneous translations 14 [Total Count: 290] Note: All words that are bold and underlined have the same meaning God put it in our nature to work because it was meant for man "to till" the ground. How is it that "to till", "to dress", "labour", "serve", "tilleth" and "served" mean the same? To till is a work, to dress is a work and to serve is a work. Remember that the Lord made the Earth and tilling the Earth has the same respect to the Lord as serving the Lord. It is not the usage of the words as much as to show the responsibility of the husband in his labor toward his family. To till the ground or to work with the same enthusiasm that you would have to serve the Lord and to care for your wife. Genesis 30:30 For it was little which thou hadst before I came, and it is now increased unto a multitude; and the LORD hath blessed thee since my coming: and now when shall I provide for mine own house also? 1 Timothy 5:8 But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel. Note: Here Jacob is working for his father-in-law for two wives and livestock but his father-in-law will not let him go because Jacob is so much blessed by the Lord. Jacob was staying with his father-in-law working for him and because so well Gods blessed Jacob that Laban would not let him leave. Did Jacob need all this to have a wife? In Ps. 37:16 "A little that a righteous man hath is better than the riches of many wicked" and not all have plenty but they use wisely what God gives them. It is natural for a man to have his own place for his family and that goes back to Genesis 2:24 "Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh". They might live together in the camp but a husband and wife will have their own tent to themselves. Providing for one's family requires responsible choices and sacrifices if it comes to that decision to make sacrifices. Provide for a family not only means to provide them with material needs of the family but just as important is the emotion and physiological needs of his wife as well as his family. To teach the children how to provide for their family and prepare them to be on their own.

To be an Example to Her and His Family Ephesians 5:23-24 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. 24)Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. Note: Now you will not find this in your dictionary and the Apostle Paul is very clear that a husband should be the example of how Christ dealt with his church and just with that thought in mind to define husband would be like writing a book. Even Christ got angry at what the people did to His Father house to turn it into a den of thieves in Matt. 21:13, Mk. 11:17 and in Lk. 19:46. The difference is that Christ was angry but He did not sin and it was not with His church. Psalms 145:8 The LORD is gracious, and full of compassion; slow to anger, and of great mercy. Proverbs 15:1-2 A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger. 2) tongue of the wise useth knowledge aright: but the mouth of fools poureth out foolishness. Proverbs 19:11 The discretion of a man deferreth his anger; and it is his glory to pass over a transgression. Ephesians 5:25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; Ephesians 5:28-29 So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. 29) For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church: 1 Peter 3:7 Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them(wives) according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered". Honour <G5092> English Words used in KJV: honour 35, price 8, sum 1 and precious 1 [Total Count: 43] From <G5099> (tino); a value, i.e. money paid, or (concretely and collective) valuables; by analogy esteem (especially of the highest degree), or the dignity itself :- honour, precious, price, some. Vessel English Words used in KJV: vessel 19, goods 2, stuff 1 and sail 1[Total Count: 23]

Of uncertain affinity; a vessel, implement, equipment or apparatus (literal or figurative [specially a wife as contributing to the usefulness of the husband]) :- goods, sail, stuff, vessel. Being heirs together<G4789> English Words used in KJV: fellow heir 1, joint heir 1, heir together 1 and heir with 1 [Total Count: 4] From <G4862> (sun) and <G2818> (kleronomos); a co-heir, i.e. (by analogy) participant in common :- fellow (joint) -heir, heir together, heir with. Note: The Apostle Peter sums it up in the word "honor" and the phase "being heirs together" as a weaker vessel but equal partnership in the marriage. Equal in person but as a weaker vessel or weaker sex as in being a women. This is no special meaning to the word "weaker" but God made the bible in a language that we can understand. The husband is to rule over the wife but to treat her as an equal person. A wife was created to help the husband and the changing of the days that we live in does not change that fact. Husbands and the Changing of the Days we Live In There is nothing in this day of age that changes anything in the bible or that is contrary to the bible. The bible does not give any such command that the wife cannot work or make more money than the husband. There are cases that the husband cannot work and becomes the one that takes care of the house as the wife goes to work. As long as the husband is doing to the best of his ability to do what he can in the husband role or the role as the father. It is only when the wife treats the husband as she is head of the husband because she works or make the most money into the household that problems accrue according to Christian couples or families. As husbands are also human in nature and therefore not even close to being prefect. Although the "H" in the word husband is for honesty it also can be for humility as well. Pride in being a good husband is not the same as pride to the point that a husband cannot be humble himself when he is wrong. There is no shame in being wrong but when it is cover up with pride than that is when the devil takes a great big bite out of the Christian character that a husband should have. It is a large responsibility that husbands have in the role as a marriage, as well as, accountability to the Lord for how they handled their role as a husband. Colossians 3:19 Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them". Proverbs 24:16-18 16 For a just man falleth seven times, and riseth up again: but the wicked shall fall into mischief. 17 Rejoice not when thine enemy falleth, and let not thine heart be glad when he stumbleth: Note: In today's marriage, there are the overwhelming problem of life, more pressure, faster pace, more hardships and a more stressful life on marriage in general. Any marriage will not be a perfect marriage and husbands and wives will stumble in responsibilities from time to time. It is so important as in Proverbs 24:17, not to rejoice in our enemies when he falls. It is EVEN much more to reach out to your husband and be there for him when he trips and not to say "I told you

so". Husband are the example in the marriage and even with the best of being humble, it bits the emotions of the husband to be any less than the best if he takes his responsibilities seriously as a Christ-like example of a husband. Proverbs 12:4 A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband: but she that maketh ashamed is as rottenness in his bones.

The Wife
In second part of this chapter about the wives and how important their role is in helping the husband be the kind of husband that is pleasing to the Lord and to be the very character of a Christ-like husband. There is a quote that I remember in a book that my dad read, "behind every successful man, there is a wife that put him there". There is much truth to that statement because a wife can just as well break a husband down as she can to left him up and it solely depends on the wife. If that is not true than just ask any husband with a contentious wife that has a gripe with her husband. No need to ask a husband, just as King Solomon and see what the Lord told Him. Proverbs 21:9 It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house. Proverbs 21:19 It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman. Proverbs 25:24 It is better to dwell in the corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman and in a wide house. The Rib In following the number <H6763>, which is used for rib, through the Old Testament. The word side and corner<H6763> was used to describe most of the Ark of the Covenant and the Temple. In 1 Corinthians 6:19 "What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own? " There are 12 ribs on each side - As husband and wife are equal, stand side by side in life There are 24 ribs, 12 pair - there are the 12 tribes of Israel and the 12 Apostles = 24 There are 7 true ribs or real ribs on each side (equally) - 7 being the number of completion There are 5 faults ribs - 5 being the number of grace God gave to man. 3 ribs share a common cartilaginous connect - The Holy Trinity also shares an equal connection The last 2 ribs are floating ribs - 2 is the number Union and the two shall become one flesh

Genesis 2:21-22 21 And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; 22 And the rib, which the Lord God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man. Note: God took only one rib from Adam to create Eve and before God created Eve, God called her a help meet. One single rib was taken from Adam and why the rib bone. The bible does not say why God chose the rib but it make sense if related to a wife. Here are three reasons why a rib was chosen. SPECAIL NOTE: these are not bible facts about the rib but the writers opinion to bring a thought to light and to make a point about the importance of the wife. 1. There are real ribs and floating ribs and the floating ribs are weaker in strength to the real ribs and that is equally on both sides. As a wife is to be beside her husband equally but as a weaker vessel. 2. Like a rib, a wife helps protect the heart of her husband. No matter how strong a husband is physically, a woman can crush a man emotionally just as an encouraging wife can make a husband stand tall. 3. A rib is the closest bone to a man's heart just as a wife is the closest person to a husband. A Help meet Genesis 2:18 And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet <H5828> for him. Psalm 70:5 But I am poor and needy: make haste unto me, O God: thou art my help <H5828> and my deliverer; O Lord, make no tarrying. Psalm 115:9 O Israel, trust thou in the Lord: he is their help <H5828> and their shield. Help meet <H5828> English Words used in KJV: help 19, help meet 2 [Total Count: 21] From <H5826> (`azar); aid :- help. Help<H5826> English Words used in KJV: help 64, helper 7, helped 18, holpen 3, succour 2 and succoured 1 [Total Count: 82] A primitive root; to surround, i.e. protect or aid :- help, succour. Note: Before Adam called her "woman", God called her a "help meet" for Adam. It is not like God

did not know what Adam was going to call her. Adam named her but God called her by the definition of what He had in mind, a "help meet". As you read this part of the chapter on marriage, you will understand the great important responsibility "help meet" or "wives" have to their husbands according to the bible. The phrase "help meet" is only used twice in the bible but the word "help <H5828>" is used 19 times in the bible. In Psalm, David used the same words to describe the help that the Lord gives us. This lets us know just how important a "help meet" is to the husband when God said that Adam needs a "help meet". A "help meet" is as important to a husband as the Lord's help is to Christians. A "help meet" is the helps the physically, emotional and psychological of the husband. If you ask how they help them physically then just ask a wife that helps her disabled husband and you will fully understand how so very important a wife can be.

A Woman The Wife as Defined by the Bible Wife - is defined as a married woman; spouse. In the dictionary. Woman or women<H802> Genesis 2:23 Wife<H802> Genesis 2:24 both are: Transliteration: ishsh feminine of <H376> ('iysh) Wife<G1135> goo-nay' Vine's Words: Wife, Wives, Woman English Words used in KJV: women 129, wife 92, [Total Count: 221] Genesis 2:21-23 21 And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; 22 And the rib, which the Lord God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man. 23 And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man<H376>. 24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. Note: The wife was not given the name of Eve until after the fall of mankind in chapter three. Adam just called her woman because she was taken out of man. Here is the intelligence of Adam in the naming of the woman. [Wo] mb + man = the woman is the man's rib that came from his womb or bosom. [fe] minine + male = the female is the feminine side of the male. Woman or women<H802> Genesis 2:23 Wife<H802> Genesis 2:24 both are: Transliteration: ishsh feminine of <H376> ('iysh) (376 is man)

Some people might call that a play in words but God was not play when He created man and woman. The bible is just a very small part of what God has revealed to us and sometimes God opens our eyes to see some of the so-called play in words and in numbers. Example of John 3:16 In John there are four letters for the four corners of the world and it is in the four Gospel. The number 3 is the symbol of the Father, Son and Holy Ghost, which is the Trinity. The number 16 is the symbol of the word LOVE and that "God(3) so loved(16) the world (John)". There is no other way to explain it is that the bible was written by Holy men moved by the Holy Ghost. The definition of the word woman did not change like it did with Abram to Abraham or when Sarai to Sarah in Genesis 17:15. So the wife and the woman come from the same as feminine part of the man. This will be taken step by step through this chapter as I go through each one of these. Just as the husband was use, wife and wives will be used the same as in husbands. W - Is for Wonderful Psalms 128:3 Thy wife shall be as a fruitful vine by the sides of thine house: thy children like olive plants round about thy table. Proverbs 12:4 A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband: but she that maketh ashamed is as rottenness in his bones. Proverbs 19:14 House and riches are the inheritance of fathers: and a prudent wife is from the LORD. Proverbs 31:10-31 10 Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies. 11 The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil. 12 She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life. 13 She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands. 14 She is like the merchants' ships; she bringeth her food from afar. 15 She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens. 16 She considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard. 17 She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms. 18 She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: her candle goeth not out by night. 19 She layeth her hands to the spindle, and her hands hold the distaff. 20 She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy. 21 She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet. 22 She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; her clothing is silk and purple.

23 24

Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land. She maketh fine linen, and selleth it; and delivereth girdles unto the merchant. 25 Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come. 26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness. 27 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness. 28 Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her. 29 Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all. 30 Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised. 31 Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates. 1 Peter 3:5 For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands: Note: There is no more that one can explain then right here in these verse written by King Lemuel, a non-Israelite who live in the land of Oz that believed in the one true God. This is in Proverbs 31:1 and was his lesson's on chastity and temperance and in verses 10 to 31 is the praise and characteristics of a good wife. I - Is for Intimate cherished) (one of the synonym is cherished and loved and respected is under

Proverbs 5:19 Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love. Song Solomon 3:4 It was but a little that I passed from them, but I found him whom my soul loveth: I held him, and would not let him go, until I had brought him into my mother's house, and into the chamber of her that conceived me. Song of Songs 8:1-7 1 O that thou wert as my brother, that sucked the breasts of my mother! when I should find thee without, I would kiss thee; yea, I should not be despised. 2 I would lead thee, and bring thee into my mother's house, who would instruct me: I would cause thee to drink of spiced wine of the juice of my pomegranate. 3 His left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me. 4 I charge you, O daughters of Jerusalem, that ye stir not up, nor awake my love, until he please. 5 Who is this that cometh up from the wilderness, leaning upon her beloved? I raised thee up under the apple tree: there thy mother brought thee forth: there she brought thee forth that bare thee. 6 Set me as a seal upon thine heart, as a seal upon thine arm: for love is strong as death; jealousy is cruel as the grave: the coals thereof are coals of fire, which hath a most vehement flame.

Many waters cannot quench love, neither can the floods drown it: if a man would give all the substance of his house for love, it would utterly be contemned. Note: These verses in the Songs is the love the church has for Christ just as the intimate love a wife should have for her husband. Both husband and wife should study the Song of Songs very closely and carefully together. Ephesians 5:22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. Ephesians 5:24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. Colossians 3:18 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord. Note: Although the words loved and respected are synonyms to the word intimate they are not the same. In Psalm 119:117 "Hold thou me up, and I shall be safe: and I will have respect unto thy statutes continually" and in this verses King David is speaking of the respect to God. Respect between the church and Christ or a wife respecting her husband. God created woman to be intimate with her husband and her children in different ways. A wife can love without respect or respect without love and any good counselor will tell you that, in fact, Dr. Emerson Eggerichs. In his book, "Love and Respect - The Respect He Desperately Needs and The Love She Most Desires", in which I will talk more about at the end of the chapter. I have listened to the CD's five times and it is absolutely wonderful book. F - Faithful to him Proverbs 14:5 A faithful witness will not lie: but a false witness will utter lies. Proverbs 27:6 Faithful are the wounds of a friend; but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful. Luke 16:10-12 10 He that is faithful in that which is least is faithful also in much: and he that is unjust in the least is unjust also in much. 11 If therefore ye have not been faithful in the unrighteous mammon, who will commit to your trust the true riches? 12 And if ye have not been faithful in that which is another man's, who shall give you that which is your own?

1 Timothy 3:11 Even so must their wives be grave, not slanderers, sober, faithful in all things. Note: How far does faithfulness go to a wife when put in a difficult situation with her husband. For example with a husband that just cannot sing but he thinks that his voice is wonderful. So the husband asked the wife about her opinion on him joining a singing group. How does the wife handle this without lying and still be faithful? The chapter on "Marriage throughout the Bible" is not a counseling book but the bible is if used to the exact letter of the Word of God. A wife could tell him a white lie but there is no such thing as a little white lie. Proverbs 27:6 was written by one of the most wisest King that received his wisdom from the Lord. This is where things go wrong very bad if not done with GREAT LOVE AND UNDERSTANDING ON BOTH THE WIFE AND THE HUSBAND. There is a question on many Christian bumpers and that is "(WWJD) what would Jesus Do". We see this everywhere but do we really think about what Jesus would really do. Something as simple as a wife asking the husband how he liked dinner as the husband is choking the dinner down because he did not like it at all. Let face it, life will find these situation and a little white lie WILL NOT help matters at all if they come to light. How would King Solomon handle this if he had to answer the question? No answer, no question and no statement should come out of one's mouth without LOVE AND RESPECT. A wife tells him with RESPECT and the husband must understand it with LOVE.

V - Is for Vessel [As for wi (v) es] Acts 9:15 But the Lord said unto him, Go thy way: for he is a chosen vessel <G4632>unto me, to bear my name before the Gentiles, and kings, and the children of Israel: Acts 9:18 And immediately there fell from his eyes as it had been scales: and he received sight forthwith, and arose, and was baptized. Ephesians 5:23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. 1 Peter 3:7 Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel <G4632>, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered. Vessel - Is for a weaker but chosen Vessel English Words used in KJV: vessel 19, goods 2, stuff 1and sail 1 [Total Count: 23] Of uncertain affinity; a vessel, implement, equipment or apparatus (literal or figurative [specially a wife as contributing to the usefulness of the husband]) :- goods, sail, stuff, vessel.

Note: The word church is not a building but an assembly of baptized believers One could ask how the conversion of Saul fit in with the definition of a wife as contributing to the usefulness of the husband. In Act 9:18, Saul was baptized into the apostleship of Jesus Christ and into the church or the bride of Christ. The bride of Christ being made up of baptized believers and Saul became partakers of the church. As special as Saul was to be used by Jesus Christ to spread the Gospel to the Gentiles, A wife is at the same degree a chosen vessel to her husband to be used by his in the same respect that Christ had for Saul, who became the Apostle Paul. The marriages in the bible and in this day of age does not change one value of what a marriage should be. Choice are still made and the wife is still the weaker vessel but also the chosen vessel to the husband. Love and respect has never change down though the ages of time but it has lost it's real meaning to some of us or we would not have the trouble we have today in Christian families.

E - Edifying to him Proverbs 14:1 Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands. Romans 14:19 Let us therefore follow after the things which make for peace, and things wherewith one may edify another. 2 Corinthians 12:19 Again, think ye that we excuse ourselves unto you? we speak before God in Christ: but we do all things, dearly beloved, for your edifying. Ephesians 4:12 For the perfecting of the saints, for the work of the ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ: Note: The Apostle Paul is talking to the Corinthians and the Ephesians in the church about the gifts of the Spirit edifying the body of Christ. The church members are the body of Christ and the Apostle Paul mentions this in 1 Corinthians 12:27 "Now ye are the body of Christ, and members in particular". It means the members are building up the body of Christ through the gifts of the Spirit. What does this have to do with the wife? The wife builds up her husband through her gifts the same the members build up the body of Christ through their gifts of the Spirit. The wife is given the gifts of love, kindness, understanding, encouragement, soft spoken, respect to her husband and all with a gentle touch. In Proverbs 14:1, a wise woman buildeth up her house or she can pluck it down with her hands. The word hands is also used as power and they do have

the power to do both build and tear down. That is why the husband is to rule over her as in Genesis 3:16 "...and he shall rule over thee". S - Security to his heart [As for wive (s)] 1 Peter 3:1-2 1) Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; 2) While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear. 1 Peter 3:1-2 Amplified Bible 1) IN LIKE manner, you married women, be submissive to your own husbands [subordinate yourselves as being secondary to and dependent on them, and adapt yourselves to them], so that even if any do not obey the Word [of God], they may be won over not by discussion but by the [godly] lives of their wives, 2) When they observe the pure and modest way in which you conduct yourselves, together with your reverence [for your husband; you are to feel for him all that reverence includes: to respect, defer to, revere himto honor, esteem, appreciate, prize, and, in the human sense, to adore him, that is, to admire, praise, be devoted to, deeply love, and enjoy your husband]. Note: Everything is equally important but the value of the wife securing her husband. It is one of the most important responsibilities the a wife could ever have. The guarding of her husband heart that most do not think about and most men WILL NOT admit it. I am man, I am strong and I have feelings and emotions of STEEL. Underneath, the man is telling himself, what if she does not like what I gave her or turns me down at the dance and many others that would hurt their feelings. A man might be physically strong but his heart is a weak muscle although some men have built a shell around it to a point. One cannot argue with the bible, the very Word of God, or a very wise King as King Solomon that had the wisdom that all Christians should desire in their hearts to have. In Proverbs 31, it tells of a wonderful wife and Proverbs 6:24,

A Spouse
Spouse - a married person, husband or wife [L. sponsus, promise]. Spouse<H3618> kal-law' English Words used in KJV: daughter in law 17, bride 9, spouse 8, [Total Count: 34] from <H3634> (kalal); a bride (as if perfect); hence a son's wife: - bride, daughter-in-law, spouse.

Genesis 11:32 And Terah took Abram his son, and Lot the son of Haran his son's son, and Sarai his daughter in law<H3618>, his son Abram's wife; and they went forth with them from Ur of the Chaldees, to go into the land of Canaan; and they came unto Haran, and dwelt there. Song Solomon 4:8 Come with me from Lebanon, my spouse<H3618>, with me from Lebanon: look from the top of Amana, from the top of Shenir and Hermon, from the lions' dens, from the mountains of the leopards. Isaiah 49:18 Lift up thine eyes round about, and behold: all these gather themselves together, and come to thee. As I live, saith the LORD, thou shalt surely clothe thee with them all, as with an ornament, and bind them on thee, as a bride<H3618> doeth.

Note: The word spouse is only mention 6 times out of the 28 other uses like daughters-in-law and the word bride. The word spouse is only used in the Old Testament and in the New Testament only bride and daughter-in-law. There is no real need to go through the word spouse in any great detail for it is all covered under the WIFE. The bride will be covered in the third part of this chapter under "The Marriage".

The Marriage

M - Is for Meaningful A - Is for an Agreement R - Is for Royalty R - Is for Realistic A - Is for Angelic G - Is for a Gift E - Is enchanted Marriage - is a legal union of husband and wife: the ceremony, civil or religious, by which two people of the opposite sex become husband and wife.

Marriage<H5772> o-naw' English Words used in KJV: duty of marriage 1, [Total Count: 1] from an unused root apparently meaning to dwell together; (sexual) cohabitation :- duty of marriage. English Words used in KJV: praise 117 glory 14 boast 10 mad 8 shine 3 foolish 3 fools 2 commended 2 rage 2 celebrate 1 give 1 marriage 1 renowned 1[Total Count: 165] A primitive root; to be clear (origin of sound, but usually of color); to shine; hence to make a show, to boast; and thus to be (clamorously) foolish; to rave; causative to celebrate; also to stultify :- (make) boast (self), celebrate, commend, (deal, make), fool (-ish, -ly), glory, give [light], be (make, feign self) mad (against), give in marriage, [sing, be worthy of] praise, rage, renowned, shine. Exodus 21:10 If he take him another wife; her food, her raiment, and her duty of marriage, shall he not diminish. Psalm 78:63 The fire consumed their young men; and their maidens were not given to marriage. Note: Marriage is only used twice in the Old Testament and 17 times in the New Testament. In John 2:1-11, the first miracle of Jesus was turning water into wine at a wedding feast. Marriage has not changed throughout the bible although the dress or ceremony might have varied a little but the meaning and importance has never changed. Not much went into detail about the marriage of Adam and Eve but a few verses in Genesis 2:21-25 and from these verse the institution of marriage was made between man and woman. The whole foundation of marriage revolves around these verses and we forget how simple is was. There are several questions about this marriage that we have filled in the answers but that we in our human nature could not leave blank. I will come back to these question, and maybe a few more, at the end of this chapter when I get into the subject of modern Christians and a biblical marriage. 1. Who married Adam and Eve? 2. Who married them? 3. what were their wedding vows? 4. what marriage license did they have? Genesis 2:21-25 21 And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; 22 And the rib, which the Lord God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man. 23 And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.

24

Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. 25 And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed. God took a rib from Adam and made him his wife which was a very part of his flesh and bone. It was God that performed the marriage and that answer one of the questions earlier. One could say that Adam slept right through some of the ceremony but there was no choice for Adam. Was God involved in the marriages after Adam and Eve? I would say, how couldn't God be involved in the marriages after Adam because in Genesis 1:28 "And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth". The children of Adam was fruitful and multiply only with the institution of marriage and God was involved with every one of them. The second time this command was given to be fruitful and multiply was with Noah in Genesis 9:7 "And you, be ye fruitful, and multiply; bring forth abundantly in the earth, and multiply therein". Marriage was an agreement between the man, woman and God. As for a vow between husband and wife was in Genesis 2:23-24 "And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man. 24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh". We know that something changed in marriage and Jesus said so in Matthew and Mark. Matthew 19:4-6 4 And he(Jesus) answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female, 5 And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? 6 Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. This statement was made when the Pharisees were asking Jesus about divorce. This make it pretty clear that God was the one that married Adam and Eve but also in every marriage after that. Remembering the quote "Until death do we part" in the marriage ceremony is no difference in its meaning than God putting the marriage together to let no man separate. Lie to your wife and see what happens to you but vow to have a biblical marriage before God and break them and you will really see what happens to your marriage. Colossians 4:1 Masters, give unto your servants that which is just and equal; knowing that ye also have a Master in heaven. Note: If the bible commands you to be just and equal to you servant which they had back then in biblical times. Just so you understand about the word command in the bible because the bible does not ask you to do anything. We are commanded to do them and that is why Jesus said to

keep His commandments. So if you are commanded to be equal to you servants than how much more is the command to be just and equal in your marriage. To give the husband what respect is due to him and to give the wife what love is due to her. These are not things Jesus is asking you to do but commanding you to do for each other. Romans 12:1 I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service. Note: Paul is telling the Christians in the Book of Romans how they should live and how this verse has any connection to marriage. Paul's theme in chapter 12 is pleasing God for the mercies given to you and chapter 12 in Roman deals with many way to please Him. One of the ways is in prayer in Roman 12:12 "Rejoicing in hope; patient in tribulation; continuing instant in prayer". It lists many more that apply to treating other Christians which will apply that much more in your marriage. If any Christian thinks that this is too much to do in a marriage. The most important in a marriage is not what you think it to be. It is not about how happy you are in your marriage. The most important question is you would ask. Does my marriage make God smile? Does my marriage please God? Does it follow all the biblical commands that God commanded me to do?

So does it?
Marriage and Prayer Genesis 24:12-14 The Prayer 12 And he(the servant) said, O Lord God of my master Abraham, I pray thee, send me good speed this day, and shew kindness unto my master Abraham. 13 Behold, I stand here by the well of water; and the daughters of the men of the city come out to draw water: 14 And let it come to pass, that the damsel to whom I shall say, Let down thy pitcher, I pray thee, that I may drink; and she shall say, Drink, and I will give thy camels drink also: let the same be she that thou hast appointed for thy servant Isaac; and thereby shall I know that thou hast shewed kindness unto my master. Genesis 24:22-27 The Prayer Answered 22 And it came to pass, as the camels had done drinking, that the man took a golden earring of half a shekel weight, and two bracelets for her hands of ten shekels weight of gold; 23 And said, Whose daughter art thou? tell me, I pray thee: is there room in thy father's house for us to lodge in? 24 And she said unto him, I am the daughter of Bethuel the son of Milcah, which she bare unto Nahor. 25 She said moreover unto him, We have both straw and provender enough, and room to lodge in. 26 And the man bowed down his head, and worshipped the Lord. 27 And he said, Blessed be the Lord God of my master Abraham, who hath not left destitute my

master of his mercy and his truth: I being in the way, the Lord led me to the house of my master's brethren. Psalm 143:1 Hear my prayer, O Lord, give ear to my supplications: in thy faithfulness answer me, and in thy righteousness. Note: Prayer in today's Christian relationships is one of the very thing lacking in our Christian lives today. We must first have the faith that it can be done for us before prayer works. In Hebrews 11:6 "But without faith it is impossible to please him: for he that cometh to God must believe that he is, and that he is a rewarder of them that diligently seek him". Prayer starts before marriage and never stops throughout the whole marriage. Just as the Lord found Isaac a wife through the servant prayer and prayer can find you that special husband or wife. A Christian can't say that it only works in biblical times because it has worked for other Christians and as well as it worked for me. It was the power of prayer that brought Mila and I together and the Lord has more than blessed our relationship. Although Mila and I are countries apart, because she lives in the Philippines, our prayer life is daily. It might be Yahoo Messenger but it does not matter to the Lord how we pray together, it is still prayer. So there are 114 times prayer is mention in the bible and in Matthew 21:21,22 is your answer to your question of prayer. Matthew 21:21-22 21 Jesus answered and said unto them, Verily I say unto you, If ye have faith, and doubt not, ye shall not only do this which is done to the fig tree, but also if ye shall say unto this mountain, Be thou removed, and be thou cast into the sea; it shall be done. 22 And all things, whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive. The first part of any important task should be to start it in prayer. Especial in finding your "help meet" to be your wife or finding a husband to be the head of your household. To be an example of Christ in your relationship or to be an example of the church in your relationship.

Love before Marriage Genesis 29:10-18 10 And it came to pass, when Jacob saw Rachel the daughter of Laban his mother's brother, and the sheep of Laban his mother's brother, that Jacob went near, and rolled the stone from the well's mouth, and watered the flock of Laban his mother's brother. 11 And Jacob kissed Rachel, and lifted up his voice, and wept. 12 And Jacob told Rachel that he was her father's brother, and that he was Rebekah's son: and she ran and told her father. 13 And it came to pass, when Laban heard the tidings of Jacob his sister's son, that he ran to meet him, and embraced him, and kissed him, and brought him to his house. And he told Laban all these things. 14 And Laban said to him, Surely thou art my bone and my flesh. And he abode with him the

space of a month. 15 And Laban said unto Jacob, Because thou art my brother, shouldest thou therefore serve me for nought? tell me, what shall thy wages be? 16 And Laban had two daughters: the name of the elder was Leah, and the name of the younger was Rachel. 17 Leah was tender eyed; but Rachel was beautiful and well favoured. 18 And Jacob loved Rachel; and said, I will serve thee seven years for Rachel thy younger daughter. 19 And Laban said, It is better that I give her to thee, than that I should give her to another man: abide with me. 20 And Jacob served seven years for Rachel; and they seemed unto him but a few days, for the love he had to her. 21 And Jacob said unto Laban, Give me my wife, for my days are fulfilled, that I may go in unto her. Note: In verse 18, Jacob had to work for her for 7 years and later Jacob wound up working 7 more years for Rachel because his father-in-law switched brides to give him Leah first. Most husband today would literally angry, which Jacob was. Stop for a minute about what has happened before going on any farther. Jacob loved Rachel and at the wedding married Leah instead but Jacob still loved Rachel. Jacob married Leah but was in love with Rachel but Jacob kept Leah. Most of us would be in divorce court the next day for marrying someone we did not love. I will go into more detail in the next part about "Love After Marriage". Genesis 28:1-3 1 And Isaac called Jacob, and blessed him, and charged him, and said unto him, Thou shalt not take a wife of the daughters of Canaan. 2 Arise, go to Padanaram, to the house of Bethuel thy mother's father; and take thee a wife from thence of the daughters of Laban thy mother's brother. 3 And God Almighty bless thee, and make thee fruitful, and multiply thee, that thou mayest be a multitude of people; Note: Isaac already commanded Jacob to marry one of Laban's daughters and, in verse 11, Jacob chose his wife when he kissed her. So it was love before marriage with Rachel but not with Leah and Jacob loved them both. So how much did the Lord guide this marriage? For a Christian, there is only one answer to this question and that is absolutely. Did they go through a ritual to see if the marriage was right for them? No, with Jacob it was love at first sight just as it was for Rachel but not per-arranged marriage. Remember that from Rachel, Leah and the handmaid came out the 12 Tribes of Israel and out of Judah came Christ. Matthew 19:6 Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. Mark 10:9 What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.

In some ceremonies the pastor quotes this verse but was really God involved in your marriage, your choice or in your prayer when you were looking. We misunderstand the word love in a marriage and just ask yourself the question. Did Jacob love Leah at the time of the marriage? It is a fact that he did love Rachel before he marriage her and in fact he loved her shortly after they met. One can say that marriages have changed over the hundreds of years since the bible was written. I would ask you, has love change or has God changed over the years since the bible? As Christians, we would have to say no but I am sure that some would say yes because of the changing times. To say love has changed is to say God has changed for all agree that love is God and God is love. The phase that "God is love" is in 2 verses of the New Testament, 1 John 4:8 and 1John 4:16. Judges 14:1-4 1 And Samson went down to Timnath, and saw a woman in Timnath of the daughters of the Philistines. 2 And he came up, and told his father and his mother, and said, I have seen a woman in Timnath of the daughters of the Philistines: now therefore get her for me to wife. 3 Then his father and his mother said unto him, Is there never a woman among the daughters of thy brethren, or among all my people, that thou goest to take a wife of the uncircumcised Philistines? And Samson said unto his father, Get her for me; for she pleaseth me well. 4 But his father and his mother knew not that it was of the Lord, that he sought an occasion against the Philistines: for at that time the Philistines had dominion over Israel. Note: Another example in the bible of love at first sight was Samson and Delilah. No matter how much we can say that it was not good to be together and we would think that to be good advice to them. God sees it in a different light in verse 4 as God brought them together for His great purpose. Love at first sight happens all the time and we ask ourselves why it failed. We have to be really careful how we judge the failures of others that God had used for His purpose and to His glory. For he was honest with his wife and it cost him his life, which we can ask is it was also to the glory of God. Yes, Samson did make some mistakes in his marriage as we all do in our marriages. Let's not forget the mistake that lead us to go through this life in Genesis 3:6 "And when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make one wise, she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave also unto her husband with her; and he did eat". This little mistake totally changed the whole world but because of it this mistake. Christ had to die on the cross but it gave us the power to become the sons of God. So when we judge mistakes and failures, we need to look back and try to see the whole picture or just let God take care of matter. Love After Marriage Genesis 24:65-67 65 For she had said unto the servant, What man is this that walketh in the field to meet us? And the servant had said, It is my master: therefore she took a vail, and covered herself.

66 67

And the servant told Isaac all things that he had done. And Isaac brought her into his mother Sarah's tent, and took Rebekah, and she became his wife; and he loved her: and Isaac was comforted after his mother's death. Note: This wonderful love story of Isaac and Rebekah and not only incredible faith in God but the power of prayer in which the Lord answered. The story starts in Genesis chapter 24 with Abraham making his servant swear to him about getting a wife for Isaac. Stop here and take a few minutes to read this chapter but take notice to how the servant found Isaac's wife though the power of prayer. One could ask if it is possible today and I would say absolutely yes because it is that same power in prayer that brought Mila and I together. The love between us is like nothing I have ever seen or felt in my entire life and it would take too long to explain it now to you but it is the most wonderful God filled love. I will explain it at the end of this chapter because it is the kind of love that all Christians couples look forward to having in their relations. I am sure that this kind of love was the same love between Jacob and Rachel. Although our love was before marriage for the fact that she still lives in the Philippines and so very far away. Nevertheless, our hearts are as one because of the type of love we have for each other. Ruth 4:9-11 9 And Boaz said unto the elders, and unto all the people, Ye are witnesses this day, that I have bought all that was Elimelech's, and all that was Chilion's and Mahlon's, of the hand of Naomi. 10 Moreover Ruth the Moabitess, the wife of Mahlon, have I purchased to be my wife, to raise up the name of the dead upon his inheritance, that the name of the dead be not cut off from among his brethren, and from the gate of his place: ye are witnesses this day. 11 And all the people that were in the gate, and the elders, said, We are witnesses. The Lord make the woman that is come into thine house like Rachel and like Leah, which two did build the house of Israel: and do thou worthily in Ephratah, and be famous in Bethlehem: Note: It is important to know that through the generations Boaz and Ruth came the Messiah, Jesus Christ. Do not get confused that we are talking about the love in these marriage of the bible. Whether or not they love their wives before the marriage or after is not the point. Whether it was Jacob or Boaz, they had no trouble in loving their wives. Today's Christian couples take weeks or months before they will tell each other that they love their partner. So what is the difference between these men and women of faith and today's Christian couple? Faith and the difference is faith in your prayers; that is your difference.

Marriage and Your Vows Vow - a solemn promise made esp. to deity. To consecrate or dedicate by solemn promise; to devote. To make vow or solemn promise [L. votum, vow]. Vow<H5088> neh'-der English Words used in KJV: vow 58, vowed 2, [Total Count: 60] or neder, nay'-der; from <H5087> (nadar); a promise (to God); also (concrete) a thing promised: -

vow ([-ed]). Promise<H562> <H1697> <H8569> Deuteronomy 23:21-22 21 When thou shalt vow a vow unto the Lord thy God, thou shalt not slack to pay it: for the Lord thy God will surely require it of thee; and it would be sin in thee. 22 But if thou shalt forbear to vow, it shall be no sin in thee. Psalm 65:1 Praise waiteth for thee, O God, in Sion: and unto thee shall the vow be performed. Psalm 76:11 Vow, and pay unto the Lord your God: let all that be round about him bring presents unto him that ought to be feared. Ecclesiastes 5:4-6 4 When thou vowest a vow unto God, defer not to pay it; for he hath no pleasure in fools: pay that which thou hast vowed. 5 Better is it that thou shouldest not vow, than that thou shouldest vow and not pay. 6 Suffer not thy mouth to cause thy flesh to sin; neither say thou before the angel, that it was an error: wherefore should God be angry at thy voice, and destroy the work of thine hands? Note: A vow in a marriage is more than just a contract between the husband and wife. It is a binding promise between the husband, the wife and our Lord God Almighty. This is why Jesus Christ(God the Son) holds them responsible for their marriage vows. Jesus Christ said that, except for fornication, the husband and wife are held to their vow "until death do you part". It does not make any different how a couple rewrites, leaves out or adds to their vows. It does not change the Word of God by one letter and you are still bound to them.

Marriage, Male and Female Genesis 1:27 So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them. Genesis 5:2 Male and female created he them; and blessed them, and called their name Adam, in the day when they were created. Matthew 19:4 And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female,

Mark 10:6 But from the beginning of the creation God made them male and female. Note: Four times the bible mentions that Adam and Eve were created "male and female" from the beginning. Reminding us that they were created different and should be treated as such in the institution of the marriage. There is a whole list of differences that one can list from emotions, feeling, how they think, in personalities, how they react, what their priorities are in a family and in their physical make up. The male is made up to protect and provide for the home and the female is made up emotionally to raise the children of the home and take care of the needs of the male. Down through the ages, men went out to fight in battles and wars. The women were to stay home to raise and care for their children. God created them to have different rolls in the family home but over time it was not God that changed the rule but man in his effort to change thing the way God meant them to be. Man wasted no time in trying to change God's plan with first the killing of Abel because Cain wanted to change the way God wanted His sacrifice. In short, Cain was mad at God for not accepting his offering from the earth and so Cain killed Abel out of jealousy. One good example is when my dad and I went to shopping for a Mother's Day card. My dad pick through a few and he picked one up this one card and said, "This is too mushy". I looked at him and said, "Dad, the card is not for you, it's for mom". A classic example of the thinking between male and female and that is the tip of the iceberg because it does get bigger. Marriage, Husbands and Unconditional Love Ephesians 5:25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; Ephesians 5:33 Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband. Colossians 3:19 Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them. 1 Peter 3:7 Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered. 1 Peter 3:7 (AMP) In the same way you married men should live considerately with [your wives], with an intelligent recognition [of the marriage relation], honoring the woman as [physically] the weaker, but

[realizing that you] are joint heirs of the grace (God's unmerited favor) of life, in order that your prayers may not be hindered and cut off. [Otherwise you cannot pray effectively.]

Note: Three times the bible commands husbands to love your wives and why the command to love your wives. God gave the command, Jesus Christ agreed and gave it to the Holy Ghost and the Holy Ghost agreed and gave it to the husband to follow that command. Three times mentioned from three witnesses to agree to one command and that is to "love your wives". When you can look at your wife and say truly to yourself that if my life was filled with the worst of troubles and trails, I would gladly go through them again just to be with her. Only then will you know love at it best and sacrifice one is willing to go through for his wife. One does not need to sacrifice anything to have a wonderful marriage, one just needs to be willing to sacrifice what it takes to have a wonderful marriage. Sit back and think of what Christ went through before He went to the cross then was hung on a cross. All this was done for everyone that would believe in Him but Christ also done it for His church, the very bride of Christ. God gave the command, Jesus Christ agreed and gave it to the Holy Ghost and the Holy Ghost agreed and gave it to the husband to follow that command. Three times mentioned from three witnesses to agree to one command and that is to "love your wives". This is not the reason it is mention three times in the bible but I find it very interesting how different things are put together in the bible. Is it wrong, no, because it changes nothing in the bible to its meaning nor its interpretation of the verses in the bible. In fact, it makes it strong because in Matthew 18:16 "But if he will not hear thee, then take with thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established". Now we have established the three witness to love your wives and they are the Father, Son and Holy Ghost. These commands come without conditions to love your wives for Jesus command you to love you enemy in Matthew 5:43, 44. If you are command to love your enemy then how much more are husbands to love their wives for no reason whatsoever. There is no clause in the bible that a wife has to deserve your love or love has to be earned by the wife. The saying that you earn the love is not biblical and breaking the very marriage vow that you vowed to keep. To ask the question on "where does it say that about marriage in the bible" is a very lame excuse for not wanting to do it at all. Are you a Christian or not? If the answer is yes and Jesus commands you to love your enemies then you better love your wife even more.

Marriage, Wives and Unconditional Respect Ephesians 5:33 Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.

Titus2:4 4 That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, 5 To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed. Note: I should safely say that I should not have to retype everything in the last subject on husbands and type it for the wives. Every word the applies to the husband again applies to the wife and I will repeat it just to make sure that they are applied equally. There are some differences between male and female like emotions. Nothing is said in the bible to love your husbands and give your life for them. It is in the makeup of a female to love and to protect the children. Just get in between a mother bear and her cub and you will find out what a female emotion is like in an animal. Women are not animals but God created them with that same instinct to protect. Wives are commanded to reverence the husband and to do it unconditionally the same as the husband. She has the same commands as a Christian that the husband has to love her enemy and to respect her husband for no reason whatsoever. A husband does not have to earn the respect of the wife and she does it out of the obedience to God that the Word of God be not blasphemed. If you are both Christian and you are waiting for the other to jump in first the both of you better remember who loved who when Jesus Christ died on the cross to forgive us and save us from hell fire.

Marriage, the Unbeliever and Christianity 1 Corinthians 7:13-15 12 But to the rest speak I, not the Lord: If any brother hath a wife that believeth not, and she be pleased to dwell with him, let him not put her away. 13 And the woman which hath an husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him. 14 For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy. 15 But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace.
16

For what knowest thou, O wife, whether thou shalt save thy husband? or how knowest thou, O man, whether thou shalt save thy wife? 2 Corinthians 6:14 Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?

Note: The bible says not to marry an unbeliever but if you are married and are happy then do not get a divorce. The bible is not contradicting itself at all and I will show you how this fits together with the two verses. For example, you are both unbelievers and one of you get saved to become a Christian. Now you are unequally yoked together with an unbeliever and Paul is saying that in some cases it happens. Knowing that the marriage plan included believers and non-believers as well in the bible. The bible is the pathway of light to a Christian and the saving grace of Jesus Christ to the unbeliever. We can not the whole plan of God so if a Christian fall in love with a unbeliever then who know if God is going to use you to save the unbeliever. I know what some will think because I am ahead of you. The Christian first tries to convert the unbeliever then marries them after the conversion. It is only when two Christians marry that they are bound by the marriage vow. If that unbeliever becomes a Christian after the marriage then they are both bound by the marriage vow.

Marriage and Your Greatest Enemy - Your Tongue Psalm 120:2 Deliver my soul, O Lord, from lying lips, and from a deceitful tongue. Proverbs 12:18 There is that speaketh like the piercings of a sword: but the tongue of the wise is health. Proverbs 17:4 A wicked doer giveth heed to false lips; and a liar giveth ear to a naughty tongue. Proverbs 18:21 Death and life are in the power of the tongue: and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof. Jeremiah 9:8 Their tongue is as an arrow shot out; it speaketh deceit: one speaketh peaceably to his neighbour with his mouth, but in heart he layeth his wait. James 1:26 If any man among you seem to be religious, and bridleth not his tongue, but deceiveth his own heart, this man's religion is vain. James 3:5-6 5 Even so the tongue is a little member, and boasteth great things. Behold, how great a matter a little fire kindleth! 6 And the tongue is a fire, a world of iniquity: so is the tongue among our members, that it defileth the whole body, and setteth on fire the course of nature; and it is set on fire of hell.

Note: I add this subject because it is the one that will creep up on you and take little bits out of your marriage which will literally eat the happiness away. I have firsthand experience in watching this happen although they are still married and get along but it is all about how happy do you want your marriage. So your eggs got cold before you got to the table but should we use that as an excuse to say some that is unloving. We are human in nature and our tongue will slip at times depends on you. I know that a tongue can be an enemy to a marriage or a blessing to your marriage. Jesus tell us in Matthew 15:18 "But those things which proceed out of the mouth come forth from the heart; and they defile the man". Cuts to the flesh heal faster than cuts you make to the heart. This is exactly why the Apostle Paul said in Colossians 3:19 not to be bitter against your wives. There are two words that one always remember but hopeful not need them too often is the words "I'm sorry". These are the words that some men have more trouble with more than women do. I have noticed that the more pride in a person the less it is used and pride is a very dangerous trait in a marriage that can be very harmful to the happiness and wellbeing of any marriage. It is the love that is the strength of a marriage and the greater the love the less the tongue is an enemy to you. The greater the lover the more the tongue will the blessing to the heart and a joy to your ears. It is most impossible for married couple not to have disagreements or even have agreements in their marriage. If nothing else, sit down a write out a set of rules to follow if that is what it takes to control a tongue. James 3:7-12 7 For every kind of beasts, and of birds, and of serpents, and of things in the sea, is tamed, and hath been tamed of mankind: 8 But the tongue can no man tame; it is an unruly evil, full of deadly poison. 9 Therewith bless we God, even the Father; and therewith curse we men, which are made after the similitude of God. 10 Out of the same mouth proceedeth blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not so to be. 11 Doth a fountain send forth at the same place sweet water and bitter? 12 Can the fig tree, my brethren, bear olive berries? either a vine, figs? so can no fountain both yield salt water and fresh. James is clear about the tongue, so how can one truly love the other and speak bitter words at the same time. James end this chapter with this verse "And the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace of them that make peace". As in the difference between male and female, the male was created to physically protect the family and was made for physical battle but the female battles with words. The male is created strong for battle but he was not made up to battle with words. A woman with a sharp tongue can Pierce right the best of a man and go right through to his heart.

Psalm 64:3 Who whet their tongue like a sword, and bend their bows to shoot their arrows, even bitter words:

Or
Psalm 119:172 My tongue shall speak of thy word: for all thy commandments are righteousness. Proverbs 21:23 Whoso keepeth his mouth and his tongue keepeth his soul from troubles.

Marriage and Sex - First Half is what God has changed in Marriage I hope that Christians will get a different view of the gift that God has blessed the institution of marriage. This is a step by step subject SPECIAL NOTE: DO REMEMBER - From Eve to the time that the Messiah was to be born was looking for their male child being the Messiah. Being part of the generation from Adam to Mary and the Messiah being born in their family was the biggest blessing of all. So remember this when studying Lot and his daughter's in Genesis and what the bible says about him. 2 Peter 2:7-8 And delivered just(rightious) Lot, vexed with the filthy conversation of the wicked: 8 (For that righteous man dwelling among them, in seeing and hearing, vexed his righteous soul from day to day with their unlawful deeds;).
7

2 Peter 2:7-8 (AMP) 7 And He rescued righteous Lot, greatly worn out and distressed by the wanton ways of the ungodly and lawless. 8 For that just man, living [there] among them, tortured his righteous soul every day with what he saw and heard of [their] unlawful and wicked deeds. In Genesis 18:23 "And Abraham drew near, and said, Wilt thou also destroy the righteous with the wicked" and Abraham knew Lot lived in Sodom at the time God was going to destroy the city and Abraham was concerned for his brother. DO REMEMBER. Knew <H3045> English Words used in KJV: know 645, known 105, knowledge 19, perceive 18, shew 17, tell 8, wist 7, understand 7, certainly 7, acknowledge 6, acquaintance 6, consider 6, declare 6, teach 5, miscellaneous translations 85 [Total Count: 947]

A primitive root; to know (properly to ascertain by seeing); used in a great variety of senses, figurative, literal, euphemism and inference (including observation, care, recognition; and causative instruction, designation, punishment, etc.) [as follow] :- acknowledge, acquaintance (ted with), advise, answer, appoint, assuredly, be aware, [un-] awares, can [-not], certainly, for a certainty, comprehend, consider, could they, cunning, declare, be diligent, (can, cause to) discern, discover, endued with, familiar friend, famous, feel, can have, be [ig-] norant, instruct, kinsfolk, kinsman, (cause to, let, make) know, (come to give, have, take) knowledge, have [knowledge], (be, make, make to be, make self) known, + be learned, + lie by man, mark, perceive, privy to, prognosticator, regard, have respect, skilful, shew, can (man of) skill, be sure, of a surety, teach, (can) tell, understand, have [understanding], will be, wist, wit, wot.

Genesis 4:1 + lie by man And Adam knew Eve his wife; and she conceived, and bare Cain, and said, I have gotten a man from the Lord. Genesis 4:17 And Cain knew his wife; and she conceived, and bare Enoch: and he builded a city, and called the name of the city, after the name of his son, Enoch. Genesis 4:25 And Adam knew his wife again; and she bare a son, and called his name Seth: For God, said she, hath appointed me another seed instead of Abel, whom Cain slew. Judges 11:39 And it came to pass at the end of two months, that she returned unto her father, who did with her according to his vow which he had vowed: and she knew no man. And it was a custom in Israel, 1 Samuel 1:19 And they rose up in the morning early, and worshipped before the Lord, and returned, and came to their house to Ramah: and Elkanah knew Hannah his wife; and the Lord remembered her. Judges 21:12 And they found among the inhabitants of Jabeshgilead four hundred young virgins, that had known no man by lying with any male: and they brought them unto the camp to Shiloh, which is in the land of Canaan.

Note: The word "knew<H3045>" has many different meaning as you can see here depending on how it is used in the sentence. So look at the top 6 verses and the 6 verses below and you will see the difference. You have to remember that God created Adam highly intelligent even to name the animals so he knew about the birds and bee's like the saying goes.

Exodus 2:25 And God looked upon the children of Israel, and God had respect unto them. Exodus 23:9 Also thou shalt not oppress a stranger: for ye know the heart of a stranger, seeing ye were strangers in the land of Egypt. Numbers 16:28 And Moses said, Hereby ye shall know that the Lord hath sent me to do all these works; for I have not done them of mine own mind. 1 Samuel 20:39 But the lad knew not any thing: only Jonathan and David knew the matter.

1 Kings 9:27 And Hiram sent in the navy his servants, shipmen that had knowledge of the sea, with the servants of Solomon. Psalm 89:1 I will sing of the mercies of the Lord for ever: with my mouth will I make known thy faithfulness to all generations. Note: The word "Known" in verse Judges 21:12 that adds "no man by lying with any male" in the verse to make it plain and clear of its meaning. We can establish that the bible views the physical intimacy between man and woman as a normal behavior. This should be something everyone knows but I am taking this step by step throughout the bible so the small pieces of a puzzle will come together to see the whole picture of what the Bible view on the intimacy between a husband and his wife. One would really be surprised how many Christians have trouble with this so far. God gave the COMMAND to Adam and Eve in Genesis 1:28"... Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth...". We know and understand this command but I am on the subject of marriage as well and I WILL NOT LEAVE OUT ANYTHING because that it WRONG. Next question would be who did they marry to replenish the earth. Adam lived 930 years and we are not told how long Eve lived but it can be safe to say that she lived a very long time. By the time Cain was old enough marry there were a lot of children from Adam and Eve. The second marriage recorded was Cain's marriage in Genesis 4:16,17 in the land of Nod and shortly after was Lamech that married two wives. Some that married were brother and sister even Abraham married his half sister Sarah. Same happened with Noah when God command him to replenish the earth again because of the flood. The wickedness of man in just about 1,500 years of being on the earth from the time of the creation.

Now, we will look at a man called Lot, in Genesis 19:30:38, after the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah. Lot's wife turned into a pillar of salt because she disobeyed God and she looked back to see the destruction of the cities. Genesis 19:30-38 30 And Lot went up out of Zoar, and dwelt in the mountain, and his two daughters with him; for he feared to dwell in Zoar: and he dwelt in a cave, he and his two daughters. 31 And the firstborn said unto the younger, Our father is old, and there is not a man in the earth to come in unto us after the manner of all the earth: 32 Come, let us make our father drink wine, and we will lie with him, that we may preserve seed of our father. 33 And they made their father drink wine that night: and the firstborn went in, and lay with her father; and he perceived not when she lay down, nor when she arose. 34 And it came to pass on the morrow, that the firstborn said unto the younger, Behold, I lay yesternight with my father: let us make him drink wine this night also; and go thou in, and lie with him, that we may preserve seed of our father. 35 And they made their father drink wine that night also: and the younger arose, and lay with him; and he perceived not when she lay down, nor when she arose. 36 Thus were both the daughters of Lot with child by their father. 37 And the firstborn bare a son, and called his name Moab: the same is the father of the Moabites unto this day. 38 And the younger, she also bare a son, and called his name Benammi: the same is the father of the children of Ammon unto this day.

Zephaniah 2:9-10 9 Therefore as I live, saith the Lord of hosts, the God of Israel, Surely Moab shall be as Sodom, and the children of Ammon as Gomorrah, even the breeding of nettles, and saltpits, and a perpetual desolation: the residue of my people shall spoil them, and the remnant of my people shall possess them. 10 This shall they have for their pride, because they have reproached and magnified themselves against the people of the Lord of hosts. Note: The Lord was angry at Moab and the name Benammi did not appear in the bible. Remember that Abraham was promised a great nation in Isaac (Genesis 12:2) and Hagar was promised a great nation from Ishmael(Genesis 21:17,18) and so Lot was never promised a great nation. So it was not because Lot slept with his two daughters that God became angry at Lot's generation. The Lord could have easily not permit the conception from happening like he has done in the past but the Lord allowed it. Remembering also, that just because the Lord allows something to come to pass does not make it right. The Peter wrote that Lot was a righteous man and did not hold this against him and read Genesis 19:33 and 35" he perceived not when she lay down" with either daughter. In Leviticus 18:1-30, the Lord stops former customs saying in verse 30 "Therefore shall ye keep mine ordinance, that ye commit not any one of these abominable customs, which were

committed before you, and that ye defile not yourselves therein: I am the Lord your God". Here the Lord is end the Age of Conscience and beginning the Age of the Law. So what was allowed by Abraham in marrying his half-sister is no long allowed by God. So just remember that sin is sin and not like our local laws where one crime is greater than another BECAUSE IT IS NOT THE CASE WITH SIN. In Romans 6:23 "For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord". So only the self-righteous opens their mouths to say "OH, look what they have done" and then turn around just to lie to the neighbor. So a sexual sin is just is bad is a little white lie and ONE CAN'T PROVE ANY DIFFERENT. It does not matter what the SIN is because Roman 6:23 will never change and the Word of God will not change.

CONCLUSSION There is more to "Marriage and Sex" then just this part but we established two things. 1) It is only God that changes the rules in the sexual behavior of what we can and can't do in a marriage relationship. 2) Sin is sin in a marriage relationship or in anything else that deals with the sin of mankind. One is no worse than the other. As soon as Adam and Eve disobeyed the Lord and ate the forbidden fruit, DEATH WAS A REQUIREMENT FOR THAT ACT. Remember how Jesus handled sin in John and should we not be like him. God only changed who we can marry as far as our relatives are concerned. God has put the Marriage rules in black and white and we SHOULD NOT ADD to what God has NOT SAID. There is one thing that did change and that is in Leviticus chapter 15 that deals with the man and the issue of women had once a month. We are no long unclean with this because the blood of Christ on the cross freed us from the law. So this is not an unclean issue any long but now it is just a natural thing that happens to women. Remember that "Marriage throughout the Bible" is exactly what is says and not overlooking any part of it, for any reason.

Marriage and Sex - Second Half - The gift is still blessed Sex in the marriage has always a wonderful gift from our Lord but our nature has changed it from the start like in Genesis. Genesis 3:7-11 7 And the eyes of them both were opened, and they knew that they were naked; and they sewed fig leaves together, and made themselves aprons. 8 And they heard the voice of the Lord God walking in the garden in the cool of the day: and Adam and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the Lord God amongst the trees of the garden. 9 And the Lord God called unto Adam, and said unto him, Where art thou? 10 And he said, I heard thy voice in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was naked; and I hid myself.

11

And he said, Who told thee that thou wast naked? Hast thou eaten of the tree, whereof I commanded thee that thou shouldest not eat? Note: It was not until the fall of mankind that our minds became corrupted to the very thought of being naked. Before in Genesis 2:25 is that they were "naked(nude) and not ashamed" and in Genesis 3:10 in that "I was afraid, because I was naked". Notice real close that God did not condemn them for being naked but for eating the fruit. All God Asked Adam was "who told thee(you) that thou(you) wast naked". Genesis 3:21 Unto Adam also and to his wife did the Lord God make coats of skins, and clothed them. Note: One of many question for young Christians to ask, if God clothed them because being naked is wrong. God clothed them for many reasons and they are: 1. First of all, God covered them as a symbol of what Christ would have to do because of sin. If you have skins then something had to die. This is more explain in the chapter "The First Shedding of Blood" because it is a symbol of Christ shedding His blood to cover the nakedness of sin that God sees in us. The skin was the redemptive work of Christ on the cross. 2. The clothing protected them because of the earth being cursed with thorns and thistles. 3. We were no long innocent children but knew the thoughts of good and evil. In Genesis 3:7, says that "the eyes of both of them were opened" and in verse 22 says that "man has become like one of us, to know good and evil". In 1 Corinthians 6:19 What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own? God has never said to be ashamed of your body. In 1 Corinthians 7:4 The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife. 4. Remembering that God sees the past, present and future as if it were present day to us. In Exodus, God made Aaron and his sons Priests of the 12 Tribes of Israel. In Exodus 28, It describes the clothes of the Priest's office and how they were made. Song of Songs or Song of Solomon This Song of Songs is a beautiful love story in the bible and one could ask why is it there. It is a symbol of the love the church has for Christ but it is also the love that one should have in their marriage. There is nothing in the Song of Songs that is not blessed by God. 1 Corinthians 7:2-6 2 Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.

Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband. 4 The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife. 5 Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency. 6 But I speak this by permission, and not of commandment. 1 Corinthians 7:5 (AMP) 5 Do not refuse and deprive and defraud each other [of your due marital rights], except perhaps by mutual consent for a time, so that you may devote yourselves unhindered to prayer. But afterwards resume marital relations, lest Satan tempt you [to sin] through your lack of restraint of sexual desire. Hebrews 13:4 Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge. Note: The Apostle Paul is clearly saying not to hold back that what is blessed between a husband and wife except "for a time" devoted to prayer. In all of marriage and the marital rights that the husband has power over the wife AND the wife has power over the husband. It is a blessed gift equal between the husband and wife. The husband is there to please the wife and the wife to please the husband. So what is done in a marriage is for both to agree on and there is nothing in the bible that says that anything is wrong as long as it is only the husband and wife. It is not written any place in the bible that it is just for having children because that is adding to what God said about marriage. There is no rules other then what a husband and wife do to each other. Do it with love in your heart and the same love you feel when reading the Song of Song because that is the love two married hearts should be singing. Marriage, Divorce and remarrying Adultery <G34929> English Words used in KJV: commit adultery 6 [Total Count: 6] From<G3432> (moichos); (middle) to commit adultery :- commit adultery. Adulterer<G3432> English Words used in KJV: adulterer 4 [Total Count: 4] Perhaps a primary word; a (male) paramour; figurative apostate :- adulterer. Leviticus 20:10 Example of Adultery And the man that committeth adultery with another man's wife, even he that committeth adultery with his neighbour's wife, the adulterer and the adulteress shall surely be put to death. Fornication<G4202> English Words used in KJV: fornication 26 [Total Count: 26]

From <G4203> (porneuo); harlotry (including adultery and incest); figurative idolatry :fornication. English Words used in KJV: commit fornication 7 commit 1 [Total Count: 8] From <G4204> (porne); to act the harlot, i.e. (literal) indulge unlawful lust (of either sex), or (figurative) practise idolatry :- commit (fornication). Exodus 22:16 Example of Fornication And if a man entice a maid that is not betrothed, and lie with her, he shall surely endow her to be his wife. Idolatry English Words used in KJV: idolatry 4 [Total Count: 4] From <G1497> (eidolon) and <G2999> (latreia); image-worship (literal or figurative) :- idolatry. Matthew 5:32 But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery. Matthew 19:9 And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery. Colossians 3:5 Mortify therefore your members which are upon the earth; fornication, uncleanness, inordinate affection, evil concupiscence, and covetousness, which is idolatry: People make the big mistake by changing the word "fornication" to the word "adultery" and they are not even the same word or meaning. It is all about control and holding a stone over your head and some Christians seem to do this with many things. The warning is in Colossians 2:2022 "Wherefore if ye be dead with Christ from the rudiments of the world, why, as though living in the world, are ye subject to ordinances, 21 (Touch not; taste not; handle not; 22 Which all are to perish with the using;) after the commandments and doctrines of men". Deuteronomy 24:1-2 1 When a man hath taken a wife, and married her, and it come to pass that she find no favour in his eyes, because he hath found some uncleanness in her: then let him write her a bill of divorcement, and give it in her hand, and send her out of his house. 2 And when she is departed out of his house, she may go and be another man's wife. Note: At no time was the divorcement based on adultery because whosoever committed adultery was stoned so there was no divorce for adultery. 1. A person sleeping with a married person is only adultery 2. A person sleeping with an unmarried person is only fornication and not adultery.

3. No matter whether it is 1 or 2 it is still sin 4. If two people are living together and agree to stay together in all the responsibilities of a marriage to take her as his wife. Is it adultery? No. Is it fornication? Is it? A marriage is an agreement between two people. The only thing that they are guilty of is not getting a marriage license. Matthew 5:28 But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart. Matthew 5:32 But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery. Note: Jesus uses the word "commit" but we as Christians has changed the word to "living in" adultery. If you fall in love with someone to found out that they were not biblically divorced then are you not to love them anymore. God did not make marriage so confusing that we need a checklist before we get involved in a relationship. Jesus said that if you look and lust that you commit adultery. Now he has committed adultery with her in his heart already. Now in verse 28, is the man "living in" adultery or just "committed" adultery. If he commits adultery and you break the speed limit then you have both sinned the same. Christians forget in Romans that the wages of SIN is death and the verse does give a list that one sin is worse than the other. One Example of David and Bathsheba 2 Samuel 11:2 And it came to pass in an eveningtide, that David arose from off his bed, and walked upon the roof of the king's house: and from the roof he saw a woman washing herself; and the woman was very beautiful to look upon. 2 Samuel 11:4 4 And David sent messengers, and took her; and she came in unto him, and he lay with her; for she was purified from her uncleanness: and she returned unto her house. 2 Samuel 11:15 15 And he wrote in the letter, saying, Set ye Uriah in the forefront of the hottest battle, and retire ye from him, that he may be smitten, and die. Note: Here is a man that Apostle Paul said in Acts 13:22 was "a man after mine(God's) own heart, which shall fulfil all my will". Now here is a King that committed adultery with a Bathseba and, on top of that, had her husband killed so David could take her for his wife. Remembering that God did punish him for David's act of adultery and having her husband killed.

2 Samuel 12:24 24 And David comforted Bathsheba his wife, and went in unto her, and lay with her: and she bare a son, and he called his name Solomon: and the Lord loved him. Through this generation came the Messiah, Jesus Christ, the Son of God. So we as Christians need to be very about judging people for what they do in their marriage. This is only one reason why Paul said in Romans 14:13 "Let us not judge one another any more..." because everyone shall give an account for himself. This by no means gives us the right to do it because the bible is clear about sin. Christians should be more careful when it comes to relationships and marriage. Most important to give it lots of prayer before hand because it is a decision of a lifetime. We can't foresee the events that take place as God can because God sees it all. What we can do is to get God more involved in the decisions that we make.

Divorce On what reason would you get a divorce? 1. If a Christian is married to a unbeliever or non-Christian then you are free from the vow and you can divorce. Remember that divorce is the last option on the list AND NOT UNTIL ALL ELSE FAILS. 2. If you are both Christians then you are held by your vows except for fornication. First thing that one would ask would be. If you are Christians then why are you getting a divorce? 3. If you are Christians and it is coming down to divorce than only you can make that decision. Note: When both are Christians then at what point is enough, is enough? Realizing that it takes two to marry but one to cause a divorce. For sure, a no-fault divorce is not a biblical divorce and both are guilty because neither has done anything wrong. The husband is guilty of not loving her as command as Christ loves His church and she did not respect him as the church is commanded to respect Christ. Before you make such a decision as that then take a minute and make it with much prayer and take the marriage challenge. You have nothing to lose by prayer and a few books but in a divorce everyone loses something.

Remarrying Divorce and remarriage has come under such scrutiny by some Christians that it keep marriage counselor really busy. There are so many different circumstances regarding two people getting married and I will cover a few.

1. Two unbelievers, that have been married before, are getting married for their second time. So it is their second marriage for each of them. They get married and a couple years later they join a church and become saved. Now they are two Christians that are married for the second time but neither had a biblical divorce. The question is now, are they as Christians guilty of committing adultery? No, they did not commit adultery as Christians because the act was done before they became Christians. When they became a Christian, their sins of their past, present and future was forgiven at the cross. 2. If two people love each other then God is faithful and true to forgive us of our sins. It is not the past that God sees but the future. Committing a sin is not living in sin and that is the whole reason for the cross and the blood of Jesus Christ. So no matter what you have done in the past of your marriage or your life, you can start over by giving it all to Jesus Christ and start fresh and new. Even if you do not have problems in your marriage, take the challenge anyway but start your challenge on your knees in prayer. These books are wonderful books and through prayer the Lord has lead Mila and I to come together. Even over the Internet, we have a wonderful prayer life and the Lord has taught us and has blessed us to share the most incredible love even thousands of miles apart. I can't explain the love we have together other then it is POWERFUL. How much is it worth to you? How much do you LOVE your partner? Would you be willing to do it for Christ sake?

A Gift of God is Priceless

Take the Marriage Challenge Whether or not you are married to a Christian or non-believer, you may ask yourself one question. How much is your marriage worth in value of a dollar? Strange question? Not really if you really think about it because there is a challenge. IF YOU WANT A BETTER MARRIAGE AND MORE MEANINGFUL RELATIONSHIP THEN I CHALLENGE YOU BOTH 1. Go to the book store and buy the book: Love and Respect - The Love She Most Desires and The Respect He Desperately Needs And the workbook for both to go through together

by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs

Website is: Love and Respect Ministries

2. Go to the book store and buy the book:

The Love Dare Book The Love Dare The Love Dare personally leads you through daily devotionals, records your thoughts and experiences, and ends each day daring you to perform a simple act of love for your spouse. This 40-Day journey equips you to melt hardened, separated hearts into an enduring love that can withstand the flames of fear, pride and temptation. The Love Dare book will help you reinforce and enrich your marriage, earn back a love you thought was lost, and hear more about the One who not only designed unconditional, sacrificial loveHe illustrated it.

by
Alex Kendrick - a associate media pastor at Sherwood Baptist Church in Albany, Georgia. He helped establish Sherwood Pictures in 2003 and has directed and co-written each of its films: Flywheel, Facing the Giants, and Fireproof, playing the lead male role in those first two productions. Alex has appeared on ABC, CNN, FOX News, American Family Radio, The Glenn Beck Show, Janet Parshalls America, and many other national programs to discuss his awardwinning work and ministry. He lives in Albany with his wife and five children. And Stephen Kendrick - a senior associate pastor of preaching at Sherwood Baptist Church in Albany, Georgia. He helped establish Sherwood Pictures in 2003 and has served as co-writer and producer for each of its films: Flywheel, Facing the Giants, and Fireproof. Stephen has spoken about his work on ABC World News Tonight and CNN and in The Washington Post and American Profile magazine among others. Currently earning a master of divinity degree from New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary, he lives in Albany with his wife and three children.

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