WordsandIllustrations 10317272 PDF

THEM WA S THE
G O O D O L D D AY S
I N D A V E N P O RT
S C O T T C O U N T Y , I O WA
/B
M
. y
W . L . P U RC E L L
O LD I E
T M R
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PUBL I S H ED B Y
P U RC E L L P RI N T I N G C O M PA N Y
H e re H OW !
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s
T O T HE OLD I ET M D E O
RS O F AV NP RT
M AY Y O U R J O U R N E Y TH O G H THE I DI
R U N AN S UM M E R
O F L I E F B E I H TE E D W I TH H
B R G N . A P P Y
ME M OR IE T HE O O D
S OF D
G OLD A YS .
Wo rd s an d I l l u s tra t i o n s As s e m b l e d by
W . L . PU RCEL L
Spe ci a l Ca rtoo n s by
W . A . EE P E RL EY
Ph otograp hs Lo an e d by
O LD T I M E RS O E DAVEN PO RT
Repri n te d fro m S ke tc hes Publ is h e d i n

THE D AVEN PO RT D E M O C RAT
Wi t h Re v i s i o n s an d Add i ti o n s
Th e H o ku m .
The A li b i
Pep : With and Without
Kid D ays A long the L evee
O riginal S imp P honey O rchestra
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Ch w b
a f D ays at D uc k Creek
ee
C orkhill and the Patch

D ancing D aysat M r s W histler s .
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Rollicking Times at Wapsie S hindigs '
W hen the E clipse Threw a S care

S lick Sk aters and S weet S ingers
H i gh h e e l Boots and B ellbottom Pants - i
With the Boys of C ompany B
H o g l at i n , Gib b erish S langua g e
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The Tale of the S cott C oun ty A pple

E noughi s S u fli s h
The Carnival City Minstrels
The Tank Town Troupers
S treet M usic and Catarrh
A n Album of Quaint Types
A t the Grumbler s C amp ’
E ncore Music and E lks - . f
The E xile of Johnny Ro b bins

The O ld Turner H all Crowd
O ld Time Cu l l u d Folks \
In D ampest D avenport
Bo b bing the Tail of D emon Rum
H ookin g S uckers in L ittle Monte Carlo
A long the Bucktown Rialto
Sk unk River A menities
The H uman Fly at the Burtis
THE M WA S T HE GO O D OLD D AYS
O ld ’
J az z d ad s Birthplace
What M ade Rock Island Great
The D ope on Chief Black H awk
The Volunteer Fire L addies
Pione er Work in Cu b ist A rt
T h ut h i e T h m i t h e r t h
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Thilly V e rt h e t h
Pretzel A lley
C ome B ack to Pretzel A lley
S teve ’
Gilman s Nimrods
Billiards and D rum Corps
The D avenport Burns Club
When Folks Were S ociabl e
C urbstone M errym a k ers
The H appy
T h e Pi c he r s .
A ntoine L e Cl a i r e
Colonel George L D avenport
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Mayors of D avenport in the Good O ld D ays

In the Forties and Nineties
O ld D avenp ort H omestead
Isaac Rothschild
H enry Jaeger s Camp on S econd Island
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A Fine S tring of Carp

O riginal H otel D avenport
D addy D avis Clam Chowder Clu b ?
D andies of the S eventies

Fran k D W f e ar
Fresh A ir Clu b
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Toot ! Toot ! The S eventy Two -
A ll D olled for E aster S unday S tyle Parade

Ted N euhaus in B elva L oc k wood Cost u me
D avenport Carnival City Minstrels
Brown and D ewey in H eavy Tragedy
Kindt s M instrel Troupers at S olon
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Grum b lers Camp on S mith s Island ’
D avenport E l k s as Filipinos
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Flashlight of Russell s S c o o p e r y
J ohn H ill
O ld Turner H all
D utch Treat D ays at O ld Turner H all
Peter N Jacobsen
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When Charlie L i p p y s Band Played
Taking a Jolt at Charlie Galla g her s
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L ittle M int on Ea st Third S treet

Burial S ervices of G o o s h i e L o gi c
THEM WA S T HE G OO D OLD DAYS
H otel D avenpo rt P ie S haped Bar
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When Co b and P k y Were Chums

ac e
D avenport s First H uman F l y

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Bert L esli e and S teve H ogan

First A utomo b ile in D avenport
Famous Never S weat Clu b
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The S teamer D onahue

O fficials of Court H ouse
Pretzel A lley P ress Clu b Parade
Bob b y Burns
Invitation to Burns Clu b
S cott County K i d y f t Clu b
ne oo
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Th e A lib i .
N O RD I N A R Y P E RS O N ,diverging from routine ,
s n i i f s an i mpulse to confi de the reason therefor

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to ease deviou s doub ts and to invi t e du b ious

endorsement : the urge to ali b i The purchase of .
a fliv has b een alibied on a salesman s suggesti o n that the ’
air is extremely desira b le for a ro b ust neurotic .
O wney G e e gan of intermittent nerves diagnosed h i s

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temperamental ailment as abd o m inal easiest appeased by ,
stimulant : the satisfactory ali b i To augment h i s .
discomfort O wney annexed a wife who tipped the beam at

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two ten
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. E xplanatory information was vouchsafed to friend s
— d i ffi c u l t i e s enc o untered wi th his fliv in ta k ing the bum p s , ,
va n i shed with connu b ial conquest : the rear seat balla s t ali b i -
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The short skirt epidemic raged— O wney developing

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op p o sition H is two tener hitting her stride and scenting

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opposition was a victim o f circumstances A n attack of flu

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four years previously was the caus e of falling hair— Mrs

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O wney observed one morning— and after visitin g a beauty

parlor for expert consultation s h e emerged therefrom with
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b ob b ed hair The cleaner delivered her best skirt that morn

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ing also and O w n e y s woman discovered a shrinkage which

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elevated that garment stylishly a b ove her s h o e t o p s .
The afternoon w a s devoted to explaining voluminously to , ,
incredulous neighbors the how com e of the twin alibi : short - -
skirt and bobbed hair That evening O wney t oo k one flash

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at h i s b u xom b etter half -

recourse to h i s s at i s f ac
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tory ali b i restrai nin g homicidal urge O n taking the .
b u mps the following S unday O w n e y s fliv wa s loaded with

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alibis—the satisfactory one and the re ar seat threesome -

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Frank Gordon sports editor solicited a contribution for

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Bob Feeney s H o m a d e H ooch column for the Christmas

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issue of the D emocrat to recall old days down the line

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H ugh H arrison city editor inspected t h at c o n t r i b ut i o n and

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urged i t s expansion with cartoons by Cep for the N ew

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Y ear s hooch resume Vince D organ recalled so m e Cork

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11
THEM WA S THE G OO D OLD DAYS
12
THEM WA S T HE GOOD O LD DAYS
hill characters Frank Brady spoke
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of old time river camps A dolph .
Petersen re g istered old T u rner hall

memori es . Walter Blair recalled
the old darky days C harlie Kin d t .
bub b led reminiscently and so did ,
R al ph C ram Fran k Throop sa id

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“
H op to it ! M ary Wright s u g
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gested a j azz vol ume for historical

archiv e s A nd s o !
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A pproaching the half century

milestone in v olun tarily we glance
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bac k ward t o observe that time has

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smoothed many rough places ; that

memory delights 1 n mooning half
forgotten incid ents of the misty
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past T r ifli n g episod es of y o uthful

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days take on retro sp ec tive charm as the years glide along .
W ebster s diction ary the city directory newspaper sport

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pages and street patter were ruthl essly prowled i n the task
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of w o rd assembling
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Phrases were lifted ideas pilfered
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expressi o ns pirated— resulting in a plagiarized potpo urri for

the delec tation and e d i fic at i o n o f tired old timers .
In the old days clothes were the handwor k of the goo d

mother who guided the destinies of numerous progeny .
Frequently clothes were bequeathed from sire to s o n an d ,
from older to younger brother Co p p e r t o e shoes incident . ,
ally were t h e vogue A young hopeful enj oyin g the luxury

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of knee pa n ts could not forego the pleasure of inserting a

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th umb in hi s fi rst pocket although cautioned to look pleas

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ant and listen to the pretty b irdie

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A mateur word assemb lers the first time out usually

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sub mit facial cre d entials—without an y ap p ar e n t j ustification

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That custom has been observed in collating Them Was the
Good O ld D ays by re p roducing on the opposite page a
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tintype b y O lmstead ta k en in eighteen seventy

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A nd now spo rt having ali b ied the prelim the g ong

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sounds that battling call

Come o n—let s go ! ’
13
THEM WA S THE G OO D OLD DAYS
A n t oi n L
e e cl i r
a e .
Ol d T i m e r wh o lc d
o a te site fo r h
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T em W as th e G oo d Ol d D a y s.
14
THE M WA S THE G OO D OLD DAYS
Colo n l G o rg
e e e L Da v . e n po r t.
Ol d T i m e r who n am e d s ite for T h em W as th e G od

o Ol d D a y s .
15
THEM WA S T HE GOOD OLD DA Y S
D av e np or t .
ln the For i t es .
ln th e Ni n e ti e s .
17
THEM WA S T HE GOO D OLD DAYS
Pe p : W i t h a n d W i t hou t .
As s e m b l i ng C h rl
a es Ki n g s l '
e y s s t uff to j azz.
h
en
g un a re fu l l o f p ep , s p ur t ,
fi n h e h vr
gt h i n
g i s
j l
a t e,
E on ma k e t he gr a h e o n ig h h p u r t ,
s ,
t b r ea h i s a n gel cake -
iihei gh GB - Y
fi tep a n the ga s ,
s p o rt
EBnn t ta k e
h a c hfn ar h gl an ce ;
’
a
fi
Ti n e u p a n h hi t the h a l l s o r t , ,
p
c h a n cep
g n h ta k e a s o r ti n
g .
wh g en
hg p pf
un a r e s e s p o r t o , ,
A
C
nh s l o fit i n
g i h
n t e r ace ,
nn t th i n k un r e o ut o f l uc k s p urt,
fi
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g ,
gi g g
l nt ati n h l h
nn h s e ts t e p a ce.
fi g
e am e ! fi ta n h fur t e raz
h , s p o rt
,
A
(
nh fnhen gnu h ac k in ac h gaze,
fi er e s
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h p o in
g gnu can c i r , s o rt , h p p
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G h e nt tua s the gnuh o l h h ags
THEM WA S T HE GOO D OLD DA YS
—J u s t to h oll r
e H e llo , cu
l s aa c l — ’
a se a ll th e m li l
tt e ti k es
li k e d M r Ro h chi l d
. t s .
22
Ki d D ay s A long th e Le v e e .
B O B — D on t s pose you reporters know

AY ,
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anything about the fun the youngsters had

in the old days before movies fl i v v e r s hip , ,
oil and eskimo pie was invented

, Course . ,
they didn t have no chili con— c arne tinfoil ’

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caramels nut sundaes nor all day suckers , ,

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then s o they had to get b y with Kendall s

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b aked beans chewin wax molasses candy ,

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licorice root and ice cream -

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When a coupla k ids w

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ent gutter s n i p i n -
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if one found a nic k el and the other hollered

hav vers b efore h i s b uddy got h i s fingers
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crossed he w a s in fift y fift y on the fin d i n s

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Then they d scoot like the dic k ens to Blac k s ice cream par
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lor on Brady street for a fiv e cent dish of ice cream with two -
S poons and M r Black woul d push the specs back on h i s

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head and divide the cream on the plate s o s they wouldn t
battle about who got the b iggest half A fter them little lads .
gob b led the ice cream they d pull straws t o s e e who d lick the ’ ’
plate the kid who got the long straw b ein the wi n ner L otsa
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little gals bought fiv e cent dishes of ice cream with two -
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spoons too whenever they found a nickel rollin up hill
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But they wasn t many nic k els rollin in them days

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Mr Black was a kind old gent with blue eye s an d gray

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sideburns and he whistled softly when s o un d i n his

, He ’
wore a b lack alpaca coat with the sleeves pulle d up to h i s

elbows and h i s cassimere pants kept k e t c h i n on the pullon
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strap of his soft soled congress gaiters The b oys called him
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S tingy Blac k because he never gave them a go od fil l i n of
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ice cream for a nickel .
S ay that was real han d made ice cream sport ! It felt

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as s o o t h i n
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as li quid sunshine tickled all the way down and , ,
tasted like it w as made by the angels That pair of kids .
had tummy capacity for a gallon of Black s ice cream an d ’

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standin room for a coupla hunks of Bremer s cream p i e with ,
out an y c r o wd i n ’
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23
THEM WA S T HE GOOD O LD DA YS
Gutter s n i p i n w a s an e xc i t i n pastime in them d ays
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U nderstand they wasn t no pavin on Bra d y street— only

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macadam and plank sidewalks with slabstone g utters A fter .
a rainstorm little boys went gutter s n i p i n —lookin for small

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change an d trinkets that the rain washed down hill to get

k e t c h e d in crac k s between the sla b stones S ometimes they .
even pic k ed up ten cent shinplasters In them days kids

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h ad t a di g for what they got Now all they gota do i s sit still .
and wait till the team star ts a drive Purty soft ! .
That s the time snipe shootin was invente d sport —

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when -
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them young inj uns learned to smoke cornsilk rattan and , ,

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killikinick behind Buckshot Norton s onion barn back of the ,
old market house L ink S tarbuck S tony Johnston C hub

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Nash D ick M c G ui r e J am t h o u gh t Jordan Clint L ee L ew O rr

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Frank Robeson Chub Wells D oc L auer Wade Willey Billy

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S team s M erv A gnew Undershot Brady Beech Fr ame Buck

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tooth Keck Muley Mullins Chook Grady P us L e c laire Brick

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O gden Johnny M i c l o t Jimmy D ooley and a lota other dead

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game sports took their s m o k i n lessons in ’
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the alley near Buckshot s barn H ad t a .
show class if you trotted with that bunch .
No chance if y our ma had name d you

Percy or H arold or C larence or if you , , ,
wore curls I f a kid couldn t smoke two .

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pipefuls of killikinick or take a chewa fin e

cut without t h ro w i n up his heels he had ’
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as much standin with that gang as a
chinaman A fter he graduated and learned .
to spit through his teeth he woul d be able

to shoot snipes and blow the smoke through
his nose like a regular feller But them .
—
b Oy s never smoked cigarets e xc e p t i n
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c up eb s and t hem ’
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c atarrh pills smelled like Jack Munro s blacksmith shop when
J ack was s h o e i n a hoss H ad t a be mighty careful their da d s

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di d n t ketch em s m o k i n and to keep an eye peeled for Tile

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bein the copper as old Til was a holy terr or for youn g sters
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that was breakin the game laws .
Kids was awful scared of cops cause they was lia b le ,

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to slam em inta the hoosego w for nothin at all

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24
THE M WA S T HE G OO D OLD DAYS
In them days kids belonged to gangs and when they ,
wandered outside their own territory they w as likely to get

a good w al l o p i n While every gang had its own whistle ca ll
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for help it was mighty dangerous for a downtown kid to

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cross the territory of the Patch gang Goosetown gang or , ,
Flatiron S quare gang unless he w as a good foot racer Now .
we got the Rotary gang the Kiwanis gang the Gyro gang , , ,
the A d c l ub gang and a lota other gangs and t hem b irds

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aint nothin but just a bunch of growed —

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u p k ids .
The Rogertown gang in E ast D avenport had a lota hard

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eggs that scared the livin daylights outa the Mount Ida gang
and Brady street gang when they went nut
pic k in in the fall S tartin early and ta k in
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their lunch them tads tramped all the way to ,
A s h f o r d s pasture and put in a hard day

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fi l l i n their sac k s with hazelnuts

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back tired and hungry the w r e c k i n crew of

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the Rogertown gang would halt em near
K u e h l s hall and a s t em what right they had
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comin out there to steal their nuts Then .
they d gra b the day s work them youngsters

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carried on their shoulders— sorta ta k in o ff ’
the pea k load Them Rogertown guys was .
awful touchy and their f e e l i n s was easy ’
hurt cause if a kid got balky and showe d fight they d gang
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h i m and give him a go od maulin D idn t do no good to go ’

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ro und a c o upla miles and come home by J ersey Ridge road ,
neither cause they had spotters out to ketch any outsiders

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that stole their nuts — them birds c o n t r o l l i n all the best nut ’
orchards from E ast D avenport to the Wapsie That s why .

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they w as s o many squirrels up there— Ro g ertown ja k es livin ’
on nuts all winter But the only way they picked nuts w as
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b y the sackful when s i x of them b rave fellers took a sackful

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away from one scared kid .
It wa s an awful disgrace in them times for a young lad

to get caught talkin to a little gal e x c e p t in h i s sister I f
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he even spoke to h i s little g al cousin he d have t o put up an ,

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airtight alibi or get razzed for bein a s i s There s h i t s o f ’

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punishment them little fellers could stan d—but not that .
25
THE M WA S THE G OOD OLD D A YS
P a ri ck T
t . Wa ls h
Fa h r
t e P e l a m o r gu e a.
26
THEM WA S T HE GOO D OLD DAYS
1 saw o co r ou n d h b n d
th e b at me
'
t e e
Goo lov r g oo d b !
d by e my
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e , ,
-
y e
Tw lo ow w mb o
aded d i th
!
as n m s te a a t en
Goo lov r g oo d b y !
d by e my
-
e , ,
-
e
B u y D y D ow n on h L v
s a s t e e ee .
S te a m b o
at n P u l D m on d n P n r P c k
S ai t a , ia J 0 Li e as s e ge a et.
THE M WA S T HE G OO D OLD DAYS
When they d ’
could they help shine her up old B i l l d s ay
as t ,
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G e t ah e l l outa here you doggone little s av ,
ages or we ll turn the hose on ya !

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O ld ’
Bill always talked in pure steamboat lan

g uage he bein the guy that taught
, them ’
steamboat mates raftsmen and the molders , ,
at D avis s t h r e s h i n machine foun d ry how ’ ’
to put real kic k in their conversation Then .
the kids would holler to ol d B ill D are y a

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to ya big s t i fl ya ! and they d leg it down
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the alley back of Van Patten an d Marks an d ,
crawl into them big su g ar ho g sheads that

the steamboats brung up from N ew O r
leans to dig out the brown sugar that had
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melted between the staves .
E ver know the handiest tool for a youngster sport— out ,
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side a pocketknife ? Why i t s a hoss sho e nail Comes in ,
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handy for c h i n k i n o ff b rown sugar in hogsheads and for

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b oldin up pants when the buttons snap o ff— them little lads
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only we ar i n pa nts waists and spenders an d mebbe a hat

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Usta swipe hoss shoe nails at Jack S peed s hoss s h o e i n shop

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when they was s h o e i n flies for Jack while he was m an i c ur i n
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the hoss s hoofs .
Them arabs never wore shoes then— e xc e p t i n on S un ’
d ays— and when a kid showed up with new shoes that

squeaked all the gan g would h av t a take turns and spit on
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em to christen em by s p o i l i n the shine
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A new suit h ad t a ’
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b e christene d too a kid always f e e l i n ashamed til he rassle d

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in h i s new h an d m e d o wn s .
’
When they got through s t o k i n up on brown sugar they d ’
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watch L ew Marks sorti u oranges and bananas and wait ’

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till he d throw away the specked ones when they was some ,
awful s c r am b l i n done—most of them oranges only bein half

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rotten .
After m i x i n specked oranges and bananas with the

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brown sugar they d romp aroun d to S econd street past Roth

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schild s clothin g store j ust to holler H ello Isaac ! — cause

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a l l them little tikes liked Mr Rothschild A nd when it came . .
time to get a s uit of clothes in t h e fall their dads gave Isaac ,
29
THE M WAS T HE GOO D OLD D AY S
the stando ff—and mebbe they paid an d meb
be they thou g ht I saac w as easy and they d ’
play the ir j ack on the growler .
Then they d move along and c i rcle

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around Richter s open face d stu ffed bear that

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stood up on h i s hind legs a b oldin on to a -

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pole with h i s front paws They d holler and .
make faces at the be ar to sh o w t h a t th e y ,
wasn t afraid and bra g about how they d k i ll

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grizzlies and Indians when they growe d up

and went to Texas to hunt bu ffaloes with
Bu ffalo Bill and Texas Jack—them goo d old
scouts b ein the grandest m e n in the world
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ac c o r d i n
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to them youngsters .
If an ice wagon with the sign Ice E Peck came , . ,
r t un b l i n
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b y and one kid hollered What d ya s e e when the
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iceman comes ? another k id would answer I —s e e — Peck !

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Then they d j ump on the tailboard and ast A ugust for a piece
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of ice s o s they could co o l the spec k led fruit that was fer
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mentin with the brown sugar but the y never even dreamed
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that they wa s the originators of orange ice and banana flip .
30
O rigin a l S i m p p h o n e y O r ch e s t r a f
.
H earin
the gangsaw sin g in down at ’ ’
S chricker and Mu e ller s sawmi l l they d ’
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hotfoot it to S cott street through the lum ,
b er yard to watch the logs gl i d i n up the

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chute to b e chewed into lum b er or they d ,

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start a game of b anter or wood tag on the -
boo m of the log raft .
Talk a b out singin sport—that ol d ’

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S chricker and Mueller gangsaw had it all

over Caruso or John M c Co r m ac k and you ,
c ould hear it from Mount Ida to Rockingham It would .
m odulate its voice when the wind shifted and do creep y , ,
t remolo stuff that sounded li k e a million m o c k i n b irds w as

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s p i l l i n out melody in a singin contest or like all the banshees

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f rom Ireland w as workin in harmony W h y even the ol d

’
.
,
H elen Blair comin around the b end of the river and b l o w i n

,
’
,
’
h e r quivery baritone whistle sounded pur tier than M ary ,
Gard en or Galli Curci or any of them high s t e p p i n j anes

,
-
,
-
’
t hat s s qu aw k i n outa talkin machines n o w d ay s

’ ’ ’ ’
.
’
That s where music fans got this symphony orchestra
i dea spo rt—t r y i n to give an imitation of the old buzz sa w
’
,
m o an i n and s o b b i n its way through a tough knot in a j uicy

’ ’
pine log down at S chric k er and Mue l ler s When the sawmill ’
.
b uzzsaw and steamboat siren done a j azz duet on a win d y day ,
d o ub l i n up with the glucose aroma that crowded the south

’
ern summer breeze D avenport s original simp phoney orches

,
’
-
tra was d i s h i n up free nose an d ear music for everybo d y

’
.
A fter a h u rr y up visit to B erger s livery to help Taich B er ’
g er and H ank Tre ffs curry hosses and swo b b uggies t hem ,
arab s trotted down to the L i b erty fire engi ne house on Brown

street to admire the fir e m a n s statue standin up in the cupola
’ ’
wit h the trumpet to h i s lips li k e he was givin orders to the ’
firemen Then they d flip a f ar m wagon for a ride u p town

.
’ '
-
,
unless so me old heiney from the L umberyard gang hollered

“ ”
Whip behind ! to the farmer .
31
The waterwor k s whistle b l o wi n about thi s time them ’
,
kids would notice t hat it was ab out time to slip on the feed
b a g so they d call it a half day and toddle home to dinner
,
’
.
The biggest honor for a kid in them d ays was t o r c h b o y

’
for the Rescues of Fifth Ward hose company s o s he could ,
S port a fir e m an s uniform— double breasted re d flannel shirt

’
-
with brass buttons white pants helmet and , , ,
torch— and step along in the fire m an s d a y ’
parade A t o r c h b o y had h i s g ang bu rnin

.
’
’
with envy and they d scamper along the ,
march h o l l e r i n to their b u ddy w i s h i n they

,
’
,
’
w as w e a r i n a red shirt
’
.
’
N ext best honor to t o r c h b o y was tot i n
the b ass drum in H av e rl y s mi nstrels street ’
parade Many hard fought battles was pulle d

.
-
’
o ff in Burtis theatre alley to decide who s
turn it w as to tote the b ass drum E ven .
b oldin music for the co m et solo g uy at the

’
’
minstrel band s evening concert would send
a youngster to the hay s p ar k l i n with happiness ’
.
Y e s indeed— them w a s the good ol d days !

, The trou b le
was them young fellers didn t know when they was well o ff ’
.
A lways w i s h i n to b e men s o s they could have a toothbrush

’ ’
handle p e e k i n outa their vest pocket or grow whis k ers lik e

’
w
,
a d octor or have
, a x end soup strainers like them dand y
- -
d udes that wore bell b ottom j eans pants Then when they
-
.
,
g rowed up to be men they switched the ho k um and wished

,
they was k ids again .
L otsa wimmen fol k s get chicken ideas too They teehee , .
and doll up li k e kindergarten ba b ies b ut they d on t fool ,

’
nobody— unless i t s the makeup they s e e in their handbag

’
m irrors .
A ll the nuts don t grow in A s h fo r d s pasture sport an d

’ ’
, ,
a lota smart fol k s ain t got no license to wonder how them

’
pop eyed hopheads get that way

-
.
32
C h awb e e f D ay s at D uck Cre e k .
B O B— E ven if kids didn t have sand y

AY ,
’
beaches an d enclose d nats in the old da y s ,
the y had s o me dand y s wimm i n plac e s ’
not c o u n t i n the A rp and Reuber swimmi n’ ’
house at the foot of Perry where a ki d coul d ,
take a swim in the little hole f o r a nickel

or in the bi g hole for a dime O n S atur .
d ays though there was such a mob wa i t i n

, ,
’
in lin e that o l d R e u b e r d onl y let em sta y in ’ ’
a half hour when he d chase em out with a ,

’ ’
’ ’
bamboo pole Boys didn t wear swimmin .
s ut t s then and a ki d that brun g soap an d towel g ot razze d for

,
bein a d ude
’
.
’
R o o k s s brickyard pond in the ravine at Tenth and Gaines
, ,
w as a dan dy swimmin hole e x c e p t i n it had a mushy y al l e r

’ ’
,
cla y bottom and gan grene scum around the e d ges Folks .
sai d it wasn t healthy to swi m there but the kids d idn t

’
,
’
b elieve em The irish canaries that boarded in R o o k s s pond

’
.
’
had fine baritone voices an d on moonli ght nights y ou co ul d

,
hear em chantin in mournful chorus down to S chuetzen park

’ ’
.
The swimm i n hole under the oak trees in F arn am str e et

’
woods was the cushiest place but it was risky for outsi d e ,
kids to ta k e a chance swi mmin there unless they stood in ’
’
with the C orkhill gang them guys takin full charge of all
,
that territory after they chased the injuns out .
The best swimmin hole w as in Baker s cow pasture west

’ ’
,
of Brady at D uck creek There wasn t nobody there to chase

.
’
youngsters just when the fun was gettin good but sometimes ’
,
’ ’
t hey h a d t a stay in all afternoon cause they d get splattered ,
with mud and h av t a jump in again and wash o ff unless the ,

’
gang agreed to let em out .
O f course it was different when lunch time came when

, ,
they d buil d a fire to bake potatoes or roast corn on hot co als

’
,
or fry a y al l e r bellied mudcat if fi s h i n was go od or boil

-
’
,
eggs in a tomato can D idn t make no di fference if ashes

.
’
33
THE M WA S T HE G OOD OLD D A YS
Ol d n h S ch l
oo at S i xt h an d M ai n .
Ol d S t o n ch l
e S oo at S e v en t h an d P rry
e .
Ol d Mo un t I da S ch l
oo at M is s is sip p i and F ul o
t n.
34
THEM WA S T HE G OO D OLD D AYS
O ne S aturday the L ocust street gang started from E agel s ’
grocery store on a hi k e to the cree k and b egan p l ay i n b anter ,

’
at Brewster s place near the old Fair grounds and k ept it

’
,
up clear out to the Blac k H ills saloon .
Cha rlie O s b orn w a s leader and when he as t them little ,
men if they all w a s game enough to fo ll y their leader in any

thing he done they said they was 8 0 Charlie peeled o ff all
, .
his togs under t h e big maple when they got near B al l u ff s and ’
,
L ew W i c k s e y and more than a dozen kids fo l l y e d suit Then .
Charlie started the p e r c e s s i o n with a ye l l and they raced a ,
half mile to the cree k c a r r y i n their duds in their hands ,

’
wh o o p i n and h o l l e r i n like wild inj uns out on the warpath

’ ’
.
E ven if there wasn t many houses along there then the wim
’
,
men folks that seen them s kinny legs fly i n past musta thought ’
that nuts w a s gettin ripe purty early that season ’

.
A fter they paddled around in the swimmin hole for an ’
hour or s o with Gus P aine Joe O rendor ff and Mike Rus

, , ,
sell collectin leeches sand b urrs and s un

,
’
, ,
b urn in fifteen inches of water they heard ,
’
that horrible cry that always puts a t eelin
of terror in the heart of a k id in swimmin ’
”
Chaw beef ! Then they knew that
Bob A rmil and H owey O liver leaders of ,
’
the notorious N o e l s s woods gang had ,
snuck up while they was e n j o y i n their ’
selves and that dirty wor k was bein done ,

’
,
as them two mal lards was the c h a m p e e n

c h aw b e e f e r s in that neck of the woods .
T here w a s some wild s c r am b l i n b y them little lads for

’
their togs and after they fished em outa the creek chawed the
.
,
’
,
knots loose with their teeth and spread em out to dry it w as ,

’
,
’
gettin nigh on to supper time O n the way home they -
.
’
remembered they had forgot about pilin the big load of wet
wood the millman b rung from Renwi c k S haw and Cr o s s e t s , ,
’
durin the week an d they k new they was due for a good
’
,
“
l am m i n when their dads s t arted astin questions unless they

’ ’
,
could get away with the old ali b i about b ein sic k in the ’
s t um m i c k .
Them was the good old days sport ! ,
37
’
They wasn t no wild wimmen pickin tame flowers then ’
nor no tame wimmen pic k in wi l d flowers When a flo c k a

’
.
j anes too k to the tim b er for an outin they d pick mayapples ’
,
’
,
wild straw b erries and hazelnuts b ut they never run h o gw i l d

, ,
and pul led em up by the roots O nly the men folks done
’
.
the kil l in — poppin the ro b ins woodpec k ers and other song
’ ’
, ,
b irds with their muzzle loaders j ust for fun and h e l p i n civ
-
, ,
’
i l i z a t i o n along by c l e an i n up the prairie chickens b obwhites

’
, ,
and pheasants Then there w a s the old sports that thought

.
d u c k s h o o t i n too tame
’
Them old roosters too k trips to the
.
wild prairies of Ne b ras ka to slaughter meek eyed b u ff aloes -
’
that j ust had noodle enough to folly the leader There s a .
coupla b u ffaloes in F e j e r v a r y par k now and it might b e a good ,
idea to stick a few wild flowers and ferns down t h e r e — o r in b
the A cademy of S ciences— s o s that the next generation k in

’
s e e what them things loo k ed li k e .
W hen L eas L ingafelt introduced grape

fruit i n this b urg Neil Collamer laughed , ,
’
and said he d rather sink a tooth into a
h e d g e b a l l or a hun k of lim b urger than in
one of them darn things Fran k Paddoc k .
passed up them j um b o lemons too sayin , ,

’
they w a s 11 g H ugh Barr cou l dn t even

. .
’
con h i s two salesmen O yster Jim and ,
C elery P ete to tackle grapefruit Them

, .
t w o b ilr d s said that just b ecause they

started H ugh in the fi s h b u siness and
.
could hoist anything in the m o isture

mar k et w as no reason why H ugh should try to feed em big
,
’
quinine pills L eas then a s t Charlie Robeson would he try

.
’
h i s taster and Charlie sa id that he d try anything once When
,
.
he put away the first grapefru it raw the other yaps expected ,
to s e e the butcher boy knocked sti ff But C harlie was gam e . ,
and only said it tasted k inda b itter Then he seasoned the .
next one with a dash of mustard and some sugar and said it ,
’
tasted finer than Charlie Cav an ar o s Florida o ranges .
Then D oc S haron and S enator Gorman split a grapefruit ,
sprinkled it wi th sugar and sai d it was the next best bet to

,
’
wild strawberri es or Bob Pringle s cream pu ffs .
38
In them days L eon A llen s dad and Tommy M c K i n n e y s ’ ’
dad had hot arguments in the old Farnam street roundhouse

re g a r d i n whose boy was the k eenest at c atin arithmetic
’ ’
b oth of them youngsters b ein j ohnny a t the rathole when it ’

- - -
come to figg e r i n and the smartest b oys in their schools

’
, .
L eon s dad said h i s b oy w a s Tommy s dad said his b oy

’
.
’
was S o after Ja ke Goehring b a lk ed on r e fe r e e i n the argu

. ,
’
ment them two dads framed for a j oint de b ate to a decision

,
on the next S unday afternoon W hen time was called L eon s .

’
’
dad examined his s o n and Tommy s dad examined his s o n , ,
and decimals and geometry w a s b ein b atted all over the ’
room Then whi l e the two proud dads w a s summin up and

.
,
’
a r g u fy i n the case a ll over the two little shavers slipp ed out

’
into the b ac k yard to play a game of j ac k s Then they played .
a game of mi b s for k eeps Then Tommy traded five com .
c d m y o f c nc I h th e A a e S ie es
mies and a g l assie to L eon for a bl ind agate Then L eon .
traded h i top to Tommy for a b ig wh i t l l y and his two

s ea
lic k er taw A nd a b out the time them little lads w

. gettin as
’
’
ready to swap j ackknives si ght unseen their dad s came out ,
-
,
and told em who was winners in the b ig contest in arithmetic

’
.
N ever heard of Crazy L itz d i d y a sport ? Well he was , , ,
a kinda queer old geezer that growed rusty whiskers and lived
in a shanty up in Main street hollow H e usta mind his own .
business and k eep his trap shut and naturally people thought , , ,
he was coocoo H e w a s easy t e as i n for the kids and when

.
’
,
he wandered down town they fo l l y e d him h e l l e ri n “

C ra zy ,
’
L itz i s gettin fits ! O ne hot day i n A ugust the y was tor

” ’
mentin him b y y e l l i n and t h r o wi n clods when the ol d man

’ ’ ’
,
39
flew clear o ff the handle gra bb ed a t an t al i z i n youngster and
,
’
gave him a bl amed good mau l in Then o l d Crazy L itz w as ’

.
pinched for d i s t ur b i n the peace and he done a thirty day

’
,
-
stretch in the cooler A fter they turned him loose he cou l d

.
wal k b y the S ixth street gang any time and not a peep outa ,
any of em A nd that gang had such hard eggs as Charlie

’
.
H as k ins E d We bb Jim H urd H arry H igh Tom L owery

, , , , ,
Johnny D rew E d Marvin H arry El dridge Billy Coulter

, , , ,
Bi l l D oo l ey D ave M agoun Tim P arker E d H ood Billy

, , , ,
Webb Ferd Mast Wils Mc c lelland Chet Cr o u l P ic k els

, , , ,
Gildea Jac k L eonard Charlie Barnes Butch Thiele H ons

, , , ,
M c G e e W i n M c Ch e s n e y D inny D enison Jac k Berryhill

, , , ,
Tom Griggs Brock D arling Tip N ealey Peg D onahoo Jim

, , , ,
Flemming and Jac k Coo k .
Jim Flemming and Jac k Coo k were the radio b oys of the
old days They had the first private telegraph line in this
.
b urg a bloc k long run n i n from their

, ,
’
homes on the corners of Brady and Main ,
along S i xth street When them boy .
wizards practiced o p e r at i n k ids usta press ’
their ears to the telegraph poles to listen

in They could hear Jim and Jac k con
.
f ab b i n b y the way the wire hummed but

’
, ,
they couldn t understand telegraph lan ’
guage .
Jim and Jac k ga bb ed through the first

telephone too and they helped string the , ,
wire That telephone w a s a great dish for

.
the natives and the two oi l spreaders that operated it tore o ff

,
-
lotsa m a zu m e It reached from the roof of D oc Mitchell s

’
.
samp l e rooms at Brady and Commercia l alley to the sidewa l k

at Rothschild s c l o t h i n store on S econd and Brady A nosey
’ ’
.
mo b gathered around ta k in turns talkin at ten cents a talk

,
’ ’
.
Two b akin powder cans without covers connected with a

’
,
fi s h l i n e stretched across the street and them cans was use d

, ,
b oth for talkin and hearin ’ ’

.
That telephone line got an awful play sport b ut no b ody , ,
ever heard the b ird on the roof s a y the line s b usy ”

But ’
.
“ ”
he was a flip young feller and he d s ay pull down your vest ,
’
40
and wipe o ff your chin b ein a hound for usin the latest ,
” ’ ’
N o w d ay s if some s a p asts for num b er

’
slang of them times .
3 3 3 3 after the little lady with the ukelele voice repeats them
,
num b ers with all the canary bird t h r r rills it sounds like
,
- -
,
Frank Fick tunin h i s flute to shoot a qu i c k fir e cadenza for

’
the symphony j ays that inhale wop opera .
In these times wimmen u s e lotsa ma k eup on telephone

ga b workin t wo b rands of lingo— the c ar d p art y gu ff and
,
’
kitchen variety When the bell rings and a dame gurgles

. ,
“
H el l o o o uh ! —all d r i p p i n with honey—i t sounds sweeter
- -
”
- - -
’
t h a n M endelssohn s S pring S ong usta sound when J a k e

“ ’
S trasser was leadin his swell orchestra But if a roughneck

’
.
brother or sumpi u hoo k s on the line the sweet voice bawls

,
, , ,
“
O h ! It ’s you i s i t ! —s o u n d i n like a s t r aw b o s s r az z i n a
”
,
’ ’
’ ’ ’
herda hunks It s sure tough sport after dopin the settin
. , ,
for hi g h class shootin to have the prize headache horn in

-
’
.
41
’
Farnam and that you didn t never know that r ai lroad time
,
was fifteen minutes ear l ier than city time in them days .
D on t know a b out them times huh ? ’
W e ll you re a fine b ird for Cor k hill ,

’
reporter !
Ab out all that you newspaper guys
does n o w d ay s i s put on the feed b ag
’
hu s tle for hooch and sha k e the jazz leg ,
with them b o b h a i r janes .
W h y in the old days when a little , ,
cutie b o bb ed her hair and came s a i l i n ’
down the line the kids usta holler , ,
“
Chippie get yer hair cut— fift e e n cents ! ”
,
L ittle gals w a s s o b ashful then that they

usta bl ush and a vamp w a s called a tramp
, .
In them times old George Ballou did all the r e p o r t i n

,
’
and e d i t i n on that sheet of yourn and John H assen and Tom

’
,
W oods did the p r i n t i n — no matter how near pic k led they ’
w as N ow who s doing all the shootin at the payroll ?

’ ’
.
A nd George didn t run no pichers of society r azb e rr i e s

’
,
e fficiency experts b ootleggers oil stoc k easers and guys that

, ,
-
,
works in ban k s neither , .
N othin like that ! ’
The only pichers that George run w a s L ydia P inkham s ’
compound S aint Jaco b s oil H ostetter s b itters and a coupla

,
’
,
’
,
Jersey ca ff s and he run em every day not every three weeks

,
’
, .
When an ad w a s s e t up it was up and M ayor Claussen ,
couldn t change it unless he squared things with A leck

’
A nderson or Cy D arling .
A nother thing B o b : In them days a guy n e e d i n eye

,
’
exercise had to go to the Burtis to watch A lice O ates and

her E nglish Blondes or slip into a barber shop and double O
“ ” -
’
the Police Gazette N ow them underwear and silk s t o c k i n
.
a d s g e t t h e u p and down and no b ody never takes a peek at

_
- -
the P olice Gazette I t s too tame .

’
.
A nd b ein a s Char lie Kindt s showshop b l o o i e d when

,
’ ’
t hat fir e n u t b ro k e out of the cuc k oo factory you re outa luck

’
.
,
Them ad club guys puts s o much stu ff on the b all that

it gives fol k s all the thrills their blood pressure will stand
44
THEM WA S T HE G OOD OLD DAYS
under . They sure help to start peopl e w e ar i n them bi g ’
h o r n r i m m e d specs and a w e a k t o p guy gets a w ay with a lota

.
stu ff by s p o r t i n them h o o t o w l cheaters

’
.
Wimmen don t care to read nothin now b ut half o ff

’ ’
-
sale ad s and cartoons or something a b out operations for ,
adenoids and tonsils A nd when some a d v e r t i s i n slicker puts

.
’
over a come o u sa l e to wo rk o ff ho l dover fly s w at t e r s in the

-
wintertime the rush b egins and they kin hardly wait for
, ,
the doors to open .
Then the riot call comes in to Bi l ly Claussen up at the

works for the extra harness b ulls and fly d i c k s to hurry up
and tame the mob A nd all this is d one without usin no
.
’
li kk er nor hooch whatsoever A ds has an awfu l k ick in em .

’
.
A nybody except an out and out dumb ell k in gra b an - -
awfu l laugh out of the news your sheet

keep shootin a b out Ireland b ein free
’ ’
now .
Where do you reporters get that

”
now stu ff ?
Why fr e e i n old Ireland was a ll
,
’
cooked and dried in the old days when

the L and L eague w as hittin her up in ’
Forrest bl oc k ha l l at Fourth and Brady .
Parnell w a s the main screw in them days ,
and the d e b at i n clu b of the L and L eague

’
b urned up Johnny Bull every S un d ay

That was when the D eputies made sleep a l o s i n
’ ’
evenin .
game for the b oys that wore the galways—when they w a s

supposed to b e d r i l l i n in the dri ll halls under the churches
’
-
.
A ny b ody that ever watched them hard wor kin old tur k s -
’
marchin in a S aint P atric k s day parade could s e e that the

’ ’
only d r i l l i n they ever done w a s on a handcar or up at the

’
stone quarry gettin ready for the bl ast In them parades they .
was all out of step b ut Curbstone Jim and Jim was ridin a ,
’
swayback .
W h y there s a coupla loaded ivories livin in this b urg

,
’ ’
that b elieves them drill stories even to this day and they ,
come out of their holes every election time to hang a few

whispers on the Wires .
45
O ri gi n a l D v n por
l H ot e a e t.
a ou
F m s h o s tl e r y of ol d d y wh n D n or w
a s e av e p t as a p o ul r
p a
rr r h r r cr
,
s um me es o t for s out e n a is to ats.
46
N ever heard a b out the L and L eague d e b a t i n clu b b at ’
tles Bo b and how the Corkhi l l j a k es and S lough j a k es

, ,
used to floc k to em ? ’
’
Well a little wisin u p won t hurt you
,
-
’
.
S ome of the hottest b attles ever fought to free old Ire

land w a s pulled o ff b y the d e b a t i n clu b in them days ’
.
The fighters w a s trained to the minute and k ept right

in the pink up to the tap of the gong the same a s these lads ,
that puts on the scraps at the L egion hall now O nly the .
style of fi gh t i n and the ru l es w a s di fferent

’
.
They wasn t no c l i n c h i n and no s t al l i n b ut they w a s

’ ’ ’
plenty of j ab b i n and footwork and w i n d j am m i n The fighters

’ ’
.
fought one at a time and they used eight pound words ,

-
instead of eight ounce gloves They uppercut with short

-
.
arm swings and b loc k ed with dirty loo k s and tried to put
, ,
across the hayma k er with wild swingin and cru el adj ectives ’
.
’
In them days the fighters wasn t hoggin for the big ’
crack at the gate receipts and they wasn t no chewin a b out ,

’ ’
weights or b avin their purty finger s manicured Them b oys

’
.
’
just naturally mixed it because they loved the fi g h t i n game .
But the great championsh i p b att l e to free Ireland and ,
the biggest ever pul l ed b y the L and L eague w as held on the ,
evenin of S aint P a tric k s day in the m o r n i n

’ ’ ’
.
The hall w a s pac k ed and j ammed long b efore the first

’
prelim and after some guy sung Joe Murphy s funny song
,
a b out A H andfu l of E arth the main go w a s announced

“ ”
, .
The b ig pr i ze at that champion s hip b attle w a s for a

decision at catch weights to settle that one b ig question :
“
Resolved that Ireland i s and of right ought to b e a
, , ,
”
free and independent nation .
To give you reporters s ome idea of what a whale of a

S how it w a s they had to have three referees for that b ig
,
contest H arry M c Fa r l an d w a s the c hief re f eree with D uck

. ,
M c K e e and S pud Flynn for assistant s Fred S haron was .
timekeeper and K erne l E d O B r i e n w as b ottle holder A ll

,
’
-
.
these lads understand w a s b orn and b r ed Cor k hill b oys and

, ,
- -
,
strictly on the wagon .
It w a s a b att l e royal from the first tap of the gong ti l l

old Johnny Bull w as stretched sti ff and co l d for the full count .
47
Four of the cleverest l itt l e l ightweights in the west w a s

-
carded for that contest and they put up the fight of their ,
lives . There w as young Kid Vo l lmer of the Bric k yard gang

and Cyclone L i s c h e r of the S awmill gang on the negative ,
side paired against S pider Bo ll inger of the Mount Ida gang

,
and Kayo G u n d ak e r of the Fifth street gang on the a ffi rma ,
tive side .
’
There wasn t a dull spot in the program .
Ea ch scrapper w as allowed to fight a fift e e n minute -
round in the semi windup and a fast three minute whir l o n

-
,
-
’
the windup s o s he could mop up the other guy with the
,
come b ac k .
E very round went the full limit in s l am b ang style -

,
tooth and nail Talk a b out shadow boxing speedy foot

- -
. ,
wor k swingin with the right up p e rc ut t i n with the left and

,
’
,
’
,
l
p y a i n for the wi nd ! Never nothin li k e it !
’ ’
Why the audience w as h o l l e r i n their heads o ff and the

,
’
,
c h eerin got s o terrific that the fol k s at Turner hall had to

’
call time on a German p l ay called Gesundheit that w as

bein pul l ed down there
’
.
But listen : A t the finish the referees b egun to mix

and lock horn s on the decision Them guys had so m e fi gh t i n .
’
blood in their b oilers too But finally they adj ourned to , .
the supreme court of the d e b at i n clu b in the bac k room of ’
’
John L i l l i s s grocery store where they fought the battle all ,
over again round b y round And the , .
next day the ice went out .
O n the fo l l o w i n S unday evenin the ’ ’
referees handed in their decision in favor

of the b attlers on the negative side b y ,
d e c l ar i n that their argument was a clean

’
knoc k out for fr e e i n Ire l and A s that

’
.
made it unanimous the little o l d Green ,
Isle was then and there declared a free

and independent nation .
S o all this noise that s b ein pulled ’ ’
now over in the O ld S od is j ust s o much

highj ac k flimmin of the b usiness agents ’
,
s t al l i n s o they won t lose their j o b s and h av t a go to wor k

’ ’
.
48
T HE M WA S T HE GO OD O LD DAYS
If them birds hadn t horned in and mussed things and ’
,
had stoo d for the har d fou g ht decision of the L an d L ea g ue

-
d e b at i n clu b all thi s j o b b i n wouldn t have too k place

’ ’ ’
.
,
But then I s pose Bo b i t s the b usiness of b usiness

’
, ,
’
a gents to keep guys from doin business that wants to do ’
business .
There w as some famous old ringsiders squatted in the

front row at that bi g b attle There w as Jerry D riscoll Char . ,
lie H ubbell O wen Murray Billy Gordon Mike K i l fe at h e r

, , , ,
Ike D eutsch D an Keeler John Crowley Pat H anley L uke

, , , ,
Brennan Jack Mullins Johnny Grady D an H orne Fo n s e

, , , ,
A m o u l d Jac k Bryson C o b b M c M a h o n J ap p y M i c l o t Banty

, , , ,
Keatin g E ddie S levin Pat L annon J i m O Co n n o r Webb

, , ,
’
,
Mason S imon Garvey Jimmy Curre y Joe H art Billy

, , , ,
Gi l o o l e y John A Feeney D annie Kennedy Cully Mc c a b e

,
.
, , ,
E d Connole J im H alligan E d M c Co r m i c k P ascal P u c i n e l l i

, , , ,
M artin D owns Goat D wyer and a lota other descenda nts of

, ,
the O ld S od .
’
There s a whole lot of old time hits that you newspaper
g uys could d ish up that d be more i n t e r e s t i n to the ladies than
’ ’
them market reports and Fatty R Buckle stories you k eep .
r un n i n
’
. Gal readers ne eds more attention than they b een
gettin now that they k in vote and work on the j uries
’
, .
W immen isn t always p r e c i a t e d Bo b In the ol d days

’ ’
, .
they saved a lota coin for the taxpayers b y s w e e p i n up ’
cigaret butts and to b acco j uice with their long trailers N ow .
the city h as to operate electric sweepers at a big expense ,
and taxes k eep j um p i n higher and higher ’

.
A nd a lota soreheads w a s b e e fi n then about w im m e n s ’ ’
styles—j ust like they i s now .
What do them b ird s want ? Can t they p r e c i at e artistic ’ ’
’
d r e s s i n or do they want all the swell dames r u n n i n around in
’
,
’
mother hubbards and sunbonnets so they ll look like a herd
of cattle ?
A d m i t t i n that straw hats i s now du e for s p r i n g i n y o u
’ ’
,
k i n expect another yawp from them b aldheaded guys that

has to wear ni ghtcaps to warm their k nobs these cold e v e n i n s ’
.
If you reporters was k een to the j ob there d be a hot ’
p an n i n comin t o them knockin crab s

’ ’ ’
.
49
THEM WA S T HE GOOD OLD DAYS
Da d d y D a vi Cl
s a m C h owd r Clu b
e .
Fer d H ay me y e r , ch e f , a t A sh f ord
’
s Pa ur
st e.
50
n d i of
D a es M rs . r
Wh i s t l e '
s D a n ci ng S c h ool .
Wa rr n co C h r l
e S tt, a ie R u ll C h r l
sse a ie B akr W W dwrh
e 1 11 a s t
r d D ck r ffor d r
o
F e , e e , I ra Gi
,
, E d W eb b ,
,
Geo ge ll
Gi ette .
D an c ing D a y s at M rs W hi s t l e r s.
’
.
I DN T
’
k now
that B uff alo Bill held h i s first
wi l d west exhi b ition in a sideshow tent in
the vacant lot j ust b elow Fourth on the ,
east side of Brady d i d y a sport ? H ad a , ,
coup l a circus ho sses b u c k i n b ronchos ,

’
,
cowboys b u ffaloes pigeo n toed squaws , ,

-
,
and real S ioux inj un b ucks who wouldn t ,

’
steal anything that w a s nailed d o wn or

w as too heavy for the squaws to carry .
Nor you didn t k now they had signs ’

,
“
W al k your hosses on the b ridge posted ,
on that government driveway and how a guy was liable ,
t o get chucked in the guardhouse if h i s s p a v happene d to
break into a trot ?

Never heard nothin about the old time dancin days . ’
-
’
e i ther d i d y a ?
, Well Mrs Whist l er s dancin school at E lev
, .
’ ’
,
c u th and Perry was the t r a i n i n ground for t e a c h i n youn g

,
’
-
’
“
bloods to d aun c e the l au n c e r s and all the f aun c y d au n c e s ,
i n c l ud i n the waltz polka schottische and square dances

’
, .
, ,
’ ’
There wasn t no n e c k i n strangle holts nor half nelson ,
-
,
-
clutches at Mrs Whi stler s— only old fashioned long di stance

.
’
- -
grips b oldin the gal at arms len th as though s h e w as liable

,
’
-
’
,
to b ite you If any smarty g ot actin cute and attempted

.
’
,
an y closeup stu ff h i s dancin partner would box his ears

,
’
darn quic k .
W h en M r s Whistler raised her skirt to her shoe tops

.
-
,
to sho w t h e boys the dance movement Charlie Baker Tim , ,
Murph y N at H arris Clarence Cochrane Fred D ecker and

, , , ,
A rt S ampson u sta blush like fury and rush to the hallway ,
they wa s s o embarrassed .
Tu e sday night w as the bi g night for the boys at M r s .
Whistler s and you could depend on m e e t i n E rnie A llen

’
,
’
,
Charlie D ixon I ra G ifford E d W ebb Nick Kuhnen D uke

, , ,
Martin I ke D eutsch Will A ltman W m S cott Charlie Ru s

, , , ,
sell Bir d Richardson A rt Wallace Will Wadsworth John

, , , ,
53
D a n d i of h S v n i
es t e e e t es.
F r nk ll
a Gi ette , H enr y C r ch l ck
a mi ae , J a Va n T uy l .
THE M WA S T HE GOO D OLD DAYS
Van Patten , H arry S mith
Charlie L eslie E d L eonard W il l , , ,
A x trn an Jules Gaspard Jim S mith H arry Kirk War r en

, , , ,
S cott Billy E vers H arry W adsworth H oward N ott Fred

, , , ,
Crouch George Iles and Vic L ittig at d ancin school li sten

,
,
’
-
,
i n to swel l piano music and t r a i n i n their dogs to b ehave s o s

’ ’ ’
,
they cou l d ta k e a j ump into society .
B efore the reverse waltz came i nto

fashion the dancers usta sp in one way -
,
w i n d i n up ti l l they got dizzy and then

’
u n wi n d i n b y s p i n n i n the other wa y S ome

’ ’
.
dancers had their car b uretors adj usted s o s ’
they cou l d w h irl one way as long as the

music played without gettin seasic k ’
.
We had some high old times at the

Fire Ki ng dances too when Bo b S windell , ,
and his b rother Nin did the fi d d l i n with ’

,
H ughey Mullin sawi n the h o s s fid S ome ’

.
times when the dancers was hittin up the V irginia reel an d

,
’
,
h av i n the time of their lives Bo b woul d j oin in the gr and

’
,
right and left p l ay i n hi s fi d and m i x i n with the d a ncers

- -
,
’ ’
.
O n e evenin when H ughey was t eelin kinda s o s o him and

’ ’
-
, ,
N in j oined the grand right and left with Bo b and dog g ed if - - -
, ,
H ughey didn t drag the old h o s s fid with him dancin it up

’
,
’
an d down the line and when Bo b called S wing yer partner !

“ ”
,
H ughey swung that b ig fi d of his n and didn t ski p a note ’ ’

.
Talk a b out j olly times sport ! More fun n a boxa ,

’
mon k eys !
W h y in the old days when Charlie
, ,
Cameron and h i s ga l and George O tt and ,
h i s gal usta dance the redowa a t B u rn s s

’
festival all the da n cer s j ust naturally

,
slipped to the sid e lines to w a tch them

two couples p i v o t i n Tal k a b out classic ’
.
’
dancin and the graceful movements of
,
Isadore D uncan a n d P avlowa— s ay if you ,
ever seen Char l ie and George a n d their

gals when they w as hittin up the redowa
,
’
you d ta k e o ff your hats and s ay that them dancers was t h e

’
-
real dancin pippins ’

.
55
THEM WA S T HE GOOD OLD DAYS
Fra n k D W f
e ar .
B ea u B r u m m l o f D n or
e av e p t J ob Pr n r
i te s.
56
THE M WA S T HE G OOD OLD DAYS
Tha t s a b out the time sport that the p l u g h a t epidemic
’
, ,
wa s ragin in this b urg H igh rollin dandies didn t thin k

’ ’ ’
-
.
t h e y was prope rly dolled unless crowned with the li d s made

fam o us by Rain i n the Face and other no b le r e d m e n who got
- - -
s aturated with fi re w a t e r The p l u g h at wa s the high si gn of .

-
gentility and the c o m e o n of the fo ur fl u s h .
H iram Price set the fashion in lids with h i s s k y s c r ap i n -

’
beaver stovepipe M ichael D onahue and S enator L owrey

.
were natural born p l ug h a t t e r s gettin away clean w ith em

-
,
’ ’
,
b ut Mose Z immerman Charlie L indholm N eighbor C a rpen , ,
ter Jo e Bettendorf and H enry Vol kman b al k ed on s p o rt i n

, ,
’
the three deck dicer -

H arry S ommers manager of the Ki m . ,
ball house d idn t feel dressed u p unless a p l u gh at topped h i s

,
’
k n ob . N either did D enny H art the head waiter E d P urse ,

-
, ,
the bartender nor Judge S haughnessy the b arber

, O ther , .
dandy dressers sported the stovepipe and the soup and fis h

,
- -
s c e nery with an d w ithout the e gg s p o t that

,
i s makin evenin clothes s o popular with

’ ’
greek waiters .
N ew Y ear s was callin day when some ’ ’

,
’
mighty fine old toppers chartered s e a goin -
hacks to pay their respects to folks that run

notices in The D emocrat sayin they would ’
keep open house H ot punch and b u b bles .

-
,
oyster patties and h i c k o ry n u t s turkey and ,
t h e t r i m m i n s was served j ust the same

’
, ,
a s at popular free lunch stations down town -

,
t h e callers always w e ar i n stovepipe s k im

’
mers . S ometimes a guy copped a nice fashionable ste w in

m aki n t hem c alls but as he only tried to be sociable by
’
,
s t o w i n away all the ju n k shoved in front of h i m and didn t

’ ’
,
want to o ff en d t h e hoste s s by tellin her the c o o k i n wa s ’ ’
b um he had a h o m e c o o k e d ali b i on the m o r n i n after when

’
~
, ,
h e wa s nurs i n a hangover
’
.
S ome dashin young swells played the free lunch layout

’
-
on the N ew Y ear s circuit sport— guys like H arry Co v e n t y

’
, ,
C harlie Gri ffi th E rnie B ennett Billy Waddell S am Maxwell

, , , ,
L en S tockwell Charlie Berryhill Bert D ow Frank S helly

, , , ,
M i s h i e Borland Billy Forrest Charlie Putnam . Frank D e

, ,
57
warf O rrin A ndrews Carl S chlegel D eacon White Charlie

, , , ,
H agemann Gough Grant D ic k H i l l Ben Tillinghast Tom

, , , ,
S winey H oward H enry E d Gi fford Ira Tabor Quin

, , , ,
A nna b le B i lly E lmer Bert C on kright Billy L ee A l M e ad l ey

, , , , ,
M er P arker Walt Cranda l l Nat H arris S picey Jones and

, , , ,
Vinegar S mith .
Them b oys had all the Chesterfie l d s t ride grace and , ,
dignity that went with that callin game and even if they
’
, ,
used b airoil and waxed their m u s t a s h e s any respecta bl e plug

,
hat felt honored to decorate their domes .

Fr es h Ai r
-
Clu b .
C ru i s ing alo ng th e H en n n
ep i C a na l .
60
THEM WA S T HE G O O D OLD DAYS
O B ri en s ,
’
and a lo ra other fol k s that didn t co m e from S weden ’
nor Cz e c h o S lova k ia
-
E amon de Valera and Countess Mar
.
k i e v i c z couldn t n ever get away with them k in d a names in

’
Winfield township .
The r ub b e r i n historian on a hero chase amid the archives

’
of the g reat S tate of S cott i s astounded at the magnificent

exhibit of deathless posterity that has sprun g from the corn
fields along the banks of the Wapsie O ther states may .
boast of war heroes or graft scarred vets of commercial battle -
fields but grand old S cott points i t s finger at animate and

,
a g gressive heroes whose names em b lazon in letters big as b ox

cars i t s scroll of fame .
L ook who s here sport’

,
Pat Crowe author actor world s greatest k idnapper

,
-
,
’
born in Winfield town ship on the b an k s of the Wapsie , .
’
Buff alo Bill scout world s greatest wildwest showman
, , ,
born in L iberty township on the b anks of the Wapsie , .
Farmer Burns r a s s l e r wo rld s greatest strangle b olt

, ,
’
-
d emonstrator b orn in Butler township on the banks of the

, ,
Wapsie .
L illian Russell opera star world famous actress b orn

, , ,
in Clinton county on the b anks of the Wapsie

, .
That s s t e p p i n some you k in tell the world !

’ ’
,
O nly one fidd l er w a s needed at them dances and he usta ,
sing when ca l lin quadrilles ma k in up verses as he went

’
,
’
a l ong while k eepin time with the music and dancin

,
’
Jimmy ’
.
’
B rennan was the star singin caller of Winfield township b ut -
,
N i e l y W halen w a s a young comer that w a s
p r e s s i n him close for first honors

’
.
“ ’
When callin to the tune of The Girl
I L eft Behind Me ”
Jimmy s song would ,
’
run sumpi u li k e this '
No w fou r g n will l d a llh ri g h e ts ea to t e t,

Wh r four n i c g l k i fi d y ou e e e a s n n
T h n b l nc l l d w l h floo r
e a a e a an e t t e
A d wi n g h g l b h i n d y ou
, ,
n s t at a e .
Jimmy sang through the quadri l le with ,
the dancers l au g h i n and j i g g i n and when

’ ’
they b alanced o n the corner s

- - -
, and gave the g rand dou b l e -
61
THEM WA S T HE GO OD OLD DAYS
s wing them ros y chee k ed lasses got some swingin

,
-
’
that
started their bl ood c i r c u l at i n ’
.
M e bb e while a handout w a s b ein

,
’
served some thoughtful guy wo ul d happen

,
to mention the little b rown jug he brung

’
out from R o d d e w i g s on h i s last trip to town
— that had s um p i n in it that w as as mild“
a s goat s mi lk A fter the fol k s took a try

” ’
.
at the refreshments that w a s a s mild as ,
goat s mil k it seemed like s um p i n happened

’
,
that put n e w l ife in the party and they d ,

’
s tart singin that j o l ly old song a b out the

’
“
L ittle B rown Ju g : ”
If cow h g v uc h m i l k
I had a t a t a e s
l d dr up i in d i lk
'
h e ss er n sat an s
o n h ch oi c h y
,
F d h ee e r t e es t a
for y i m ly
,
A d m i lk h
n er t t es a c a .
H l h l h l Y ou d m l
a a a an e
Li l b r ow n j
tt h w I lov
e h ! u g, o e t ee
Then some b ody would remem b er to call

for B eezy
Maloney to dance a jig— Beezy bein s o light on her feet s h e ’
could balance a glass of water on her head and d ance an Irish

j ig without s p i l l i n a drop Then when B eezy raised her
’
.
,
s k irt to give her feet plenty of action the fiddler would begin ,
p l ay i n
’
and Beez y would get up on her toes and show the
,
folks some real j i gg i n that b rought plenty of applause ’

.
Then O wney O B r i e n and h i s woman after a whole lota

’
,
t e a s i n and c o a x i n
’
would ta k e the floor to step o ff a reel
’
, ,
’ ’
givin all the fancy twists and turns sa s h ay i n and flirtin ,
’
,
bowin and s m i l i n while Jimmy Bre nnan put in hi s b est

’ ’
,
“
l icks p l a y i n Mrs M c L e o d s Reel
’
.
’
.
That dance would lead up to call for a bit of a song ,
and D ominick Gillin would be ast would he sing My Molly ,
It took a whole lot of c o a xi n an d p al av e r i n to get ’ ’
D ominick wound up for he would try to excuse hisself by ,
’
sayin : Bad cess t me but t h d i v i l a word can I ray ’
,
’
me mber at all at all,

”
But after the folks demanded and .
,
insisted and wouldn t listen to no excuse D ominick woul d

,
’
,
clear his throat and cough a coupla times an d then start ,
singin in a slow tremulous c o m e al y e voice

’
,
62
W h i n O i wi n w i t o u t an m o re n n
'
o n h of M
,
Tw
!
i h as n t e m t ay ,
Oi m i e Oi i h
t a il p r t ty r s ge rr
A d un o h
,
Oi d id
n t er say
h nd in o
.
Oi mp ut poc k e a t m e e t
A d i h pp n d n b t a e e to e so
S u r O i uc k
e g oold n gu i n
t m e e ea
F ri o r Molly 0 !
to t a t m e ,
A s D ominic k warmed to h i s wor k he grew more c o n fi d

ent and h i s voice b ecame clearer stronger louder and when
, , , ,
every body in the par ty joined in with him while singin the ’
last line For to tr at me Mo l ly O ! —you could hear that

’ ”
,
chorus way over at Ground Mound in Clinton county .
“
More power D ominick an long life t ye ! a youn g
,
”
,
’ ’
Ga l lagher lad wo u ld shout .
“
Ha Hal-
Tis D ominic k that h a s the foine v ice ! one
’ ” ’
of t h e little A rmstrong gals wou l d declare .
Then the m e rry chorus of L ittle Brown Jug would b e

“
repeated ha y in a whole l ot more pep this time and young

,
’
Paddy Murphy would start the call for California P at to

’
show the young b ys and g e r r i l s how he usta dance a real
Irish j ig in the O u l d Country -
H av i n b een lookin on quietly .
’ ’
an d l i s t e n i n attentively to the others while s m o k i n his pipe

’ ’
,
contentedly in the corner California P at b ecame all fl u s t e r e d , ,
and acted sheepishly and emb arrassed as he begged to b e ,
excused .
“
A rrah h i v e n b less y e z ! he pleaded b ashfully
,
”
S ure n , .
’
’ ’ ’
I haven t putt a futt t t h fl uu r since t h ’
”
c h r i s t e n i n av M o i k e D i m p s e y s son Garge
’ ’
.
But there w as no s t e p p i n the call for ’
California P at once it started and though , ,
h e w a s proof against all entreaty and coax

i n it was plain he was nettled and annoyed
’
,
by the taunts of Charlie D u ff y who d ared “

,
’
him to dance a ji g sayin that he couldn t ,
’
d ance like he usta back in the O uld C oun

try o r he wouldn t take water b efore all
,
“ ” ’
the neighbors The taunts of Charlie D u ffy .
had the e ff ect o f bringin C alifornia Pat ’
to life unexpectedly for he st o od up an d declared that The

,
D u ffy niver b reathed that cu d mak e a B r i n n i n take water .

To think that he California P at—who had suff ered the

,
p rivations and hardship s of that terrib le overland journey to

C alifornia in an o x drawn prairie schooner with the o l d
-
f o rty n i n e r s and with the hard earned gold he wrested from

-
, ,
-
the eternal hills concealed in h i s belt had taken a s a i l i n ,

’
vessel to the Isthmus of Panama and then hoofed it over the ,
mountains on the return trip to bu y h i s coveted eighty acres ,
in Winfi eld town ship—should take a dare ! ”

A nd from a
D u ffy !
W ur r a ! W u rra ! Twas more than mortal man could ’
stand !
B o un d i n to the middle of the room suddenly California
’
,
P at jumped high swin gin his arm s wildly and s l ap p i n hi s

,
’ ’
chest forcefully as he shouted : “

,H ur r oo b y s ! L ong live -
,
’
O i r e l an d an d County Kilkenny and may t h d i v i l m e n d t h

’ ’
,
c o n n uc k m i n
’
wan and all ! Jimmy me b y —play the
, ,
’
‘
Flowers of E d i n b urg till yer f a ather shows t h heavy ,
’
-
’
heeled D u ff ys how a B r i n n i n can dance a r al Irish j ig ! ” ’
A nd California Pat had a dash of fire in h i s heels that

night for he danced a real Irish ji g j ust li k e he usta dance
, ,
when a b oy b ack in County Kilkenny in the O uld C ountry ,
’
where he won manny s the prize in the dancin contests a t ’
the country f airs .
W hether it w as the goat s mil k from the little b rown j ug ’
or the naggin of a D u ffy that started the ancestral fire s

’
,
b u m in in the b reast of that hardy old pioneer is small matter

’
, ,
b ut the li k es of t ha t j ig was never seen b efore nor since in

W i nfield township .
California Pat shouted as he danced l e ap i n high as th e ,

’
ceilin c r ac k i n his heels an d w e l t i n the floor with hi s

’
,
’ ’
b rogans ti l l the rafters shoo k and the dishes rattled while

, ,
the prism pendants of the hangin lam p in the parlor clattered ’
to the r o l l i c k i n strains of the Flowers of E dinburg

’“ ”
The .
fervor of hi s parent w as reflected in young Jimmy Brennan ,
a s the fi d d l e b ow ski m med merrily over the strings

-
and the ,
honor of County Kil k enny w a s upheld in a f a s c m at i n concord ’
of movement between sire and son .
There was haughty defiance mingled with kindly pity ,
directed toward Charlie D u ff y in every movement of the ,
64
T HEM WA S T HE GOO D O LD DAYS
excited dancer an d an expression of fine contempt for all

,
dou b ters spread over his sturdy handsome features , .
Whe n C al iforni a Pat finished dancin that I rish j i g ’

,
Charlie D u ff y on b ehalf of the D uff ys one and all present

, , ,
a n d a b sent apologized profuse l y for h av i n entertained any ’
doubt about the j ig dancin a b i l ity of California Pat and as

’
, ,
he grasped h i s friend s hand he shoo k it warmly sayin that

’
, ,
’
now he k new for sure that a Brennan would never ta k e a

d ar e f
’
At sun up the next m o r n i n while the young lads slept

’
soundly under t h e eaves California P at wi th s l e e v e s r o l l e d

'
, ,
up to hi s s un tanned shoulders w a s s l o p p i n the hogs an d

-
,
’
f e e d i n the chickens
’
H e smiled good h um o r e d l y as he s ur
.
-
v e e d the corn th a t w as r i p e n i n over in the east forty while

’
y ,
“
he crooned softly to himself that homely ould chune My ,
Moll y O ! — for it p l a i s e d California P at immensely to know

,
”
'
“
f o r sure for all time and forever that
,
The D u fi y niver
,
b reathed that cud ma k e a B ri n n i n ta k e water ”

.
Too t ! To o t l The Se ve n t y -
two !
Co nni e O ’B rien a nd th e Ki lk n
e n y cr w e !
T HE M WA S T HE G OOD OLD DAYS
Matthias Fr ahm B ernhard E s e k e D ic k S h e b l e r H enry

, , ,
Korn and Fritz Paulsen w as ar g u fy i n a b out the b arley mar

,
’
ket and the pric e of hop s at Fifth and H arri son whe n O ld ,
S ol went o ff watch and when they b r o k e for cover up , ,
to the summerhouse old E d had the b ig b ras s lamp lit , ,
and them boys took a cl utch treat and switched their ga b ,
from food to astr onomy .
Connie O B r i e n came s t e am i n in with a way freight

’ ’
from Bro o klyn with P at Riley s h o v e l i n b lac k diamonds

,
’
in to old engine seventy two Ji mm y O M e ar a w a s the front -

.
’
b r a k e s y an d Barney Costello was the con t hat perched in the

little red cabo o se when C onni e whistle d down b rakes and
stopped the train at H arri son street alongside D ow Gil , ,
ma n and H ancock s elevator s o s the Riley b oy could touch

’ ’
, ,
up the kerosene g lim in the ingine headlight .
All them l ad d y b u c k s on that train crew was from

old Coun ty Kilkenny e x c e p t i n Zee M c M ah o n the second ,
’
b r a k e s y he bein from D onegal or one of them north coun

’
, ,
ties. And them boys knowed more ab out h andlin freight ’
trains than M ose H o bb s or S eth Twom b ley or any of them ,

,
wi se crackers that w a s w e ari n paper collars and makin out

-
’ ’
report s in the old Farnam street roundhouse .
That s when Zee M c M ah o n usta sing

’
Bi n k e m ! My l d h Bun k e m ! o en !
l y gg fo r r i l r o d m
Sh e a s e s a a en.
Som i m i gh
e td om i m
es e t an s e t es te n
Bi k m !
n B k m !
e My l d h un e o en !
Un d erstand sport in them days the b r a k e s y s and con

, ,
h a d t a do hand b r ak i n from car to car and t w i s t i n

’ ’
r un n i n
’
-
,
the b ra k e s not h av i n no hoghead sittin in the ca b to put

,
’ '
the c l ampers on with a shot of j uice B r ak e s y s and switch .
men coup l ed car s with their b are mitts and a regular hard ,
b oiled ra i lroader wa s always s h y a coupla fingers from s e e i n ’
how lon g he cou l d ho l d h i s hand b etween the b umpers with

out gettin k e t c h e d when ma kin a c o u p l i n
’ ’ ’
.
P urty cushy for engineers n o w d ay s with airb ra k es and ’
e l ectric lights But even at th at sport them o l d tim ers

. , , ,
could j er k the throt t l e on the o l d i n gine and pep her up s o s

’
68
T HEM WAS T HE G O O D O LD DAYS
a b unch of shotes or y
’
she d throw li stee r s furth er than
’
e ar n
an y of these guys with al l their electri city and modern i m :
p v e m en t s .
r o
P eople wa s scare d s t i ff a b out th t eclipse as i them a , n
days fol k s b elieved in ghosts goblins b nshees and fa iries , , a , ,
an d in payin their de b ts
’
N w d y they thi nk they re too
. o
’
a s
’
wi se for that old bun k but a lota B arnum s one minute

,
’
-
a-
yaps are still with u s an d ar e ducksoup for o i l s t o c k e r s .

,
sociali sts and easy money pirates j ust the same

,
-
A littl e ,
.
mushy con about ten per cent a month - - - -
stu ff and them open and shut guys c an

,
- -
’
take em for th eir underclothes .
In them tim es lovey an d dovey

dreamed a b out th e h ar d c o al burner and
horsehair f u rniture for th e parlor wi th ,
a kerosene hangin lamp h av i n a fl ock ’ ’
of prism glass d e w d a d s d angl i n around

-
’
the dome an d mak in a noise like a ,

’
’
rock crusher while bein p u lled down for
-
l i gh t i n But n o w d ay s lovey and dovey

’
.
’
dop e up on stucco b u ng alo w s sun p arlo r s and sport model , ,

-
roadsters with fathead father for the fall gu y

, A nd they .
ai nt got noodle enough to t hink of go in out in t h e woods ’
and l ivin in tr ees with the other squirrels

’
.
B ut mebb e t h e squirr els is gettin particul ar ’

.
Fri tz H aller usta throw in a chunk of liver with a ten

cent soup bone and he d slip you enough do g meat on the
-
,
’
side to keep the family fed up on hash for two days .
When little gals played with their d ollies they wore

long dresses s o s th ey look li k e their mammas pri n ters
’ ’
,
could tell a comma from a b o b t ail fl ush and b oilerm akers ,
could ride on the w a t e rw a g o n all through lent w ithout b atti n ’
an eyelash .
Gran ger Wallace usta play Nancy L ee on the mouth

organ and his little sister accompanied him with the j ews
h arp and that little te am of blondies had it all over these
,
nut eyed uke tw an gers that i s makin the earache a popul ar

-
’
mal ady n o w d ay s
’
.
69
When spring came around and dandelions b egan bloom

in in them days sport fo lk s took sulphur and molasses w ith
’
, , ,
cream of tartar or a shot of salts and senna to cool their

, ,
b lood that had got overheated from fe e d i n up on b uc k ’
wheats fl an n e l c a k e s and por k sausage d urin the winter

, ,
’
.
D octors told e mi to hit up rhu b ar b sauce mush and mil k

’
, ,
corn b read and green onions to cool their b lood for the dog
, ,
days There s a smart hunch for l ady memb ers of the cold
.
’
feet clu b and for o l d codgers that s l eep under s i x b lan k ets
,
S to k e u p on b uc kwheats and hotdogs an d put heat under ,
the b elt L ay o ff the rhub ar b and onions

. H eat the b lood .
to concert pitch and next summer dance the shimm y and

,
do high divin at that new swimmin joint that s b ein b uilt

’ ’ ’ ’
b y hand down on the levee .
70
S l i ck S k a t e r s a n d S we e t S in ge r s .
sport— Y ou don t know S ay ,

“ ’
nothin a b out the old days when we ’
usta p l ay chec k ers for excitement on

’
winter e v e n i n s in the corner grocery
—b ack in the times when C ash Wat
son wa s the c h a m p e e n ice s k ate -
jumper— do you ? That s goin back ’ ’
purty far b oy— b ac k t o the s k at i n ,

’
park of Collins and Casette between ,
Brady and Main on S eventeenth when s c r e w he e l club s k ates ,
first came into style and when all the youn g fellers and their
,
gals had the s k at i n fever in its worst form’

.
O f course Cash Watson w as the original rough ridin

,
-
’
ice skater an d when he took to j u m p i n all the others took a

-
,
’
,
b ac k seat When it came to fancy trick and graceful s k at i n

.
’
,
though M iley Blakemore stood at the top of the heap and

, ,
he performed with the speed of a greyhound and the grace

of a gazelle .
But you kin tell the world they ain t b een no real ice ’
skate j um p i n since Cash hung up his world s record by

’ ’
j m i
’
u p n over twenty old fashioned school benches -
.
Th at s what Cash d one sport

’
S tarted out to j ump , .
over ten and ended by breakin the record Just slipped a

,
’
.
dime wad of fin e c u t into his left cheek done some c i r c l i n ,

’
,
too k a tailsp i n an d nosedive g ot a fly i n start and— zowie ! ,

’
Cleaned twenty benches like a tomcat would clean a canary .
N o w d ay s a lota hotdogs gets peeved for not gettin

’ ’
credit for doin a little pea nut b usiness for the old bur g
’
.
Just s o s they won t be no s qu ab b l i n about who gets credit

’ ’ ’
’
for Cash Watson s ice skate jump you kin s ay the benches -
,
was b o r ry e d from Jake N agel principal of the L ocust street ,
school and the guys that carted them benches was H enry
,
Randall T e e d e e E a gal L ee Valentin e Brick Bryan George

, , , ,
S trong Tom Sh erman Jim H oughton B oney Mack H oosier

, , , ,
O sb orn G u s Koester D uck Wilsey Frank Balch Joe H ar

, , , ,
71
rington ; Pete Remine Charlie B oo th Roy Keyser Will H os

, , ,
ford A l W i n k l e s s Charlie H ibbard an d T ad o r Kuehl

, , , .
’
Noth in like keepin the record straight sport
’
, .
I don t suppose you ever heard of Jack P owers an d his

’
little brother M ickey that usta light the gas lights on the
,
lamp posts on do wntown corners Jack carried the ladder

-
.
and wo uld lean it against the lamp post and M ickey would -
climb up and light the gas with his torch O n ev eni n s .

’
when they was a little s c r ap p i n to be d one Free M c M ah o n ’

,
and B adger Cottrell helped em d o the l i g h t i n Then about ’ ’

.
three o clock in the m o r n i n the P owers kids went around

’ ’
and doused the glims and they split three bucks a week ,
for doin this work ’

P retty soft huh ? . ,
When the circus w a s billed k ids usta scout t h e alleys ,
for magnesia bottles to sell at H arrison and H olman s d rug ’
store Them there w a s the original Boy S cout drives

. Mr . .
H arrison always had a nickel to slip a kid for a magnes i a

bottle and then if the kid played in luck sellin scrap iron
,
’
’
to old Jake and could run a few errands for a penny he d
, ,
b e all settin p ri t t y on circus day Kids would run their

’
.
legs o ff doin errands for a penny then but n o w d ay s it

’
,
’
takes a d i me or a quarter to get them to step on their starters .
Y ou young fellers is excused for not k n o w i n good sing ’
i n never h av i n heard Jim D ermody Tom

“
’ ’
, ,
B i d d i s o n Joe Carroll and Tommi e Mack , ,
doin close harmony at Johnny M c G ui n ’
’
ness s .
That quartet put more zip into songs

’
than the guy that wrote em ever dreamed
a b out They sang all them smooth old .
tim er s li k e L arboard Watch ” “

S ilv e r , ,
Threads ”
S weet Genevieve ” “
D aisy , ,
D ean S wanee Ribber and Cah v e D at

” “ ” “
, ,
P ossum and when they tipped over The “

,
O ld O aken Bucket there wasn t a dry ’
throat in the j oint .
Then there was D oc Worley at the livery barn at Fifth ,
and Brady D oc could spiel tenor bass or falsetto and plun k

. , ,
72
the guitar like a S panish cavalier H e playe d in C maj or .
and A minor with capo on the fifth fret and could gra b all
,
,
them nau g hty barb er chords for the hi g h spots and do the ,
bass runs to a fr azzle .
O n moonlight e v e n i n s D oc hitched up the team of b ays ’
to h i s b est landau lowered the top and invited the quartet , ,
to go s e r e n a d i n pickin up L awrie the Coon with his deep

’
,
’
,
cellar bass Comin back to the barn they always gave a

.
’
concert to the b ig crowd that w as w a i t i n an d L awri e would

’
,
dance the G aw gi e E ssence on the b oard sidewalk

“ ”
.
D oc Worley sang E mmett s Lullaby and Cuckoo

“ ” ’
S ong and warb led as sweetly as J K himself and when he

”
. . ,
trilled S weet P eggy O M o o r e you d never know it wasn t

” ’ ’
“ ’
W J S canlon N o w d ay s young fellers twang the u k e and

’
. . .
sing A in t We Got Fun ’ ” “

A ll By Myself In S unny Ten
” “
, ,
”
n es s ee .
S ome after t r i m m i n Billy C atton and L anny

ev enin s ,
’ ’
Maca ff ee at shark pool down at L ewy

B o qu i l l i o n s M ax O chs would join up
’
.
,
and try his mellow baritone voice on

“
Moonlight on the L ake with the help
”
,
of the quartet the chorus and the Coon , , .
A cross the street in front of D ave H unter s market ,

’
,
e n j o y i n the concert you d find Granny Conyer — L awrie s old

’ ’ ’
mammy—and old A unt L ucy two fine c u l l u d types of the ,
old slavery days A nd along about ten o cloc k when Granny

. ,
’
,
began to nod and grow sleepy s h e would interrupt the merry ,
makers b y callin over ’
“
Come long h e a h yo L aw n c e Co n y e h !
’
Bout time ,
’ ’ ’
’ ’ ’
yo was totin home with y o u a h o l Granny an not singin ,
’ ’
’
all e b e n i n fo dem white f o l k s e s ca se they don t want f o
’ ’
,
’ ’ ’
’
to sociate with no c ul l u d trash S o come on long h e ah .
’
,
L aw n c e fo I s e done gwine home

’
,
’ ’
S ides I s e got a poweh .
’ ’
ful l ah g e washin to s t a h t s o ak i n f o de ’ ’ ’
A n d L awrie would reply

“
Y as s u m Granny— y as s um — I s e a
-
,
-
’
Then while the colored trio walked homeward the sere

“
n a d e r s would j oin in the chorus Carry M e B ack to 0 1 ’
,
”
Vi rgin n y .
THE M WA S T HE G O O D OLD DAYS
S ay b oy ! ,
That 0 1 Vi r g i n n y
’
son g sh o l y did make light
st ep p in fo
’
dem c u l l ud fo l k s e s
’
.
A unt L ucy lived in the basement of the c ul l ud church

at Fourth and Gaines after s h e had grown too old to make ,
the rounds as washerwoman .
W hen Clevelan d w as elected ,
there was lotsa k i d d i n with ’
the c ul l u d folks the story ,
b ein circulated that if a ’
democrat got elected presi

dent all the old slaves would
b e sent back to the cotton
fields S am M c Cl at c h e y met .
A unt L ucy after the election ,
and a s t her what s h e thought

about Cleveland and if s h e ,
w a s getti n ready to go b ac k
’
to A la b ama A unty had other .
worries a b out that time for s h e shifted the red bandana on ,
her head and told about Johnny S chmidt the county poor ,
master b ein overdue in his coal dates

,
’
.
“
A h aint b o t h e i n ma haid bout who done got l e c t e d
’ ’ ’ ’
,
chile W hat A h is b o t h e d bout is when M istah S m i ff i s

.
’ ’
gwine to d e l i v ah ma wi n t ah coal Go long now S ammy .

’
, ,
’
b out yo o l l e c t i um an don fool yo o l aunty What A h
’ ’ ’
,
’ ’ ’ ’
.
’
wants stid of l e c t i u m is mo c o h n m e al bacon an t at e h s
,
’ ’
,
’
, ,
’
”
f o de col w i n t ah m o h n i n s
’ ’ ’
.
But there were always a few kind white folks to loo k

after the simple needs of ol d A unt L ucy .
L emme tell you sport—them was the good old days ! ,
Kids usta spit for good luc k when they d spot a red ’
’
headed gal and then they d look for the white hoss before
,
makin a wi sh N o w d ay s they need to be some spitters

’
.
’
with all these henna headed ba b ies flo at i n around A nd

-
’
. ,
bein as they aint no more white hosses they re outa luc k

’
,
’
unless they wish s u m p i n on a y al l e r cab or ford coop ’

.
Barney Reddy played Molly “ “

D own in a Coal
Mine and S weet E v al i n a on the wheezy hand organ for
”
,
“ ” -
the hoss power merry g o round at the old Fair grounds

- - -
,
74
T HE M WA S THE G OOD OLD DAYS
Al l D oll e d for E asr S u n d y S yl P r

te a t e a a de .
S an H a rr on
is ck uck
and Ni B .
76
H i gh h e e l Boo t s a n d B e llb o t t o m P ant s .
L et me tell you sport these H o t s t o v e leaguers don t

, ,
’
k now nothin a b out natural b ase b all— the game played b y

’
hand not b y machinery

, N o w d a y s with shinguards chest.
’
, ,
protectors mitts masks spi k es and other tools a ball player

, , , , ,
-
loo k s like a warrior b old startin out on stick— u p duty

’
.
Why the old timers played with b are k nuc kles and could
, ,
do their stu ff with b are feet in a pinch First bounce w as .
out— s o w a s over the fence The .
empire h a d t a watch his step and ,
they wasn t no b e a n i n nor spi k ’ ’
in
’
The pitcher done underhand .
pitchin — not t h r o w i n —and the ’ ’
catcher too k em on first bounce ’

.
They played scrub an d one 0 1 -

’
cat for money m arb les or chalk and they would fight at the
, , ,
drop of a hat .
E ver heard of that crac k a ll star nine of k id players in -
the old days the E nterprise club ?

,
S ome team sport—some b all team Trained on Gris

, .
wold college grounds with P rofessor S heldon and Professor,
Brooks for coachers .
H ad the original s tonewall i n fie l d — H iram D illon on

first Jim P reston on second George Preston on third and
, , ,
George W Fren c h at short

. In the outfield Buck L ayden .
played right Max O chs center and Billy Meese left

, H arry , .
Glaspell done the pitchin and Jo e L ane the c at c h i n ’ ’
The E nterprise clu b cleaned up everything in the base

ball line in Western I l linois and E astern Iowa and then went ,
to L e Cl a i r e to trim the Brown S t o c k i n s ’

.
That g ame for the ch a mpionship of S cott county was

, ,
pulled in H anley s pasture with Billy Chamberlin empirin

’
,
’
.
S core sixty eight to thirteen for the E nterprisers

-
The , .
audience of thirty three inc l uded Captain Wes Ram b o of

-
,
the S teamer L i bb y Conger and h i s crew not c o u n t i n a herd ,

’
of steers in the next pasture .
77
T HE M WA S T HE G O O D O LD D AYS
Understand sport them L e Cl ai r e bugs was rank home

, ,
towners and couldn t s w o l l y the t r i m m i n their b oys got

’ ’
without fr am i n to even up thin g s

’
.
Nobo dy knows how the E nterprise ball

players got to L e c laire t hat d ay but every body ,
knowed that walkin was fair to m i d d l i n

’
So ’
.
when C aptain Wes Rambo as t them would they

like to ride back on the L ibby C on g er they said
sure thing A fter they got planted comfortably
.
on the boat the Cap gave the h i gh s i g n to start ,
but he stopped the L ibby about twenty feet from

shore and showed his loyalty to L e Cl ai r e b y
tellin them E nterprise b oys he d changed his
’ ’
min d and guesse d they d better walk to D avenport

’
He .
talked in straight steamboat language without no ifs nor , ,
ands nor buts

, H e gave em five seconds to j ump o ff the
.
’
boat and to show that he wasn t k i d d i n the old fir e eater

,
’ ’
-
yelped a wild in j un warwhoop j er k ed his hip cannon and

, , ,
busted her three times in

the air .
v
H i D illon d rew first

water but Jim Preston b eat
,
him to shore Billy M eese .
and Buck L ayden was tied

for third place with the ,
other E nterprisers s t e p p i n ’
on their h e e ls .
Then C aptain Wes hol

lered and a s t them boys how
man y tallies the y scored in
that i nn i n and he blowe d ’
,
the whistle for the L ibb y

Conger to start d ownstream .
B y that time sport them , ,
champion ballpla y ers was

all outa pep from r un n i n
’
’
around bases and p ullin for
the s hore in their swimm in
’
78
T HE M WA S T HE GOO D O LD DAYS
contest s o they stretched out to d ry un d er the old e l m tree

,
.
H arry Glaspell knowed an easy pickin livery stable guy that -

’
owne d a picnic hack and H arry coaxe d him to hitch up and

,
drive the E nterprise champions to E ast D avenport .
Them w a s the days when swell d ressers wore high top -
boots wi t h three inch heels -

L ew D avis sported the finest.
calfskin boots that Robert Murdock coul d make but L ew ,
didn t have nothin on Charlie Benton Chet L orton Jack

’ ’
, ,
Munro Mick M c Cr e l l i as nor any of them freight engineers

, ,
or conductors on the Roc k Island when it come right do wn ,
to class in high heel boots -

.
’
That s where the wimmen folks got this french heel idea -
they copped from the boo b s that staked em to the rib ’

.
N o w d a y s men i s lucky if they wear fl y dick heels that need

’
-
attention from a greek heel strai g htener .
Men di d n t wear trousers then—only pants

’
A nd when .
they wore em creased the kids usta holler H and me down !

’ “ ”
- -
When a young feller graduated from roughneck society

and broke out as a dude he d slip into a paper collar an d ,
’
visit B ar t e m i e r s c l o t h i n store and get measured for sporty

’ ’
three dollar black j eans pants with twenty two inch bell
- -
b ottoms They fit h i s legs as ti g ht as blony sausage and he

.
’
h a d t a u s e a shoe horn to slide into em Then he d put up ’
-
.
h i s best front and spiel a song and dance to Jules G u i l l y o - -

,
the old frog shoemaker and hook ,
him for a pair of made to order - -
high heel low quarter shoes a g ree - -

,
i n to come through with the coin

’
on payday night Isaac Rothschil d .
wa s the next mark to get nicked

for the red soc k s and the red neck
tie Then E d Ryan would get the .
h u r r y u p for the lid one of them ,
l o wb r i d g e potboiler kellys that bal

a n c e d on his ears the kind that yid ,
comedians is still using in vau d e

ville .
Then b ein a ll s e t t h is l ad y k i l l i n proposition would

,
’
,
’
parade S econd street on S unda y afternoon to give free eye
79
entertainment to the dames that wore b ustles opera hats , ,
and b angs and w as s t e e r i n for S huler tintype ga l lery to

,
’ ’
have their pichers too k .
E ver k now S port who w as the first guy to u s e poetry

, ,
in his newspaper a d s ? Why when E d Ryan operated h i s ,
hat j oint at S econd and Main he had a ten foot p l u gh a t a b ove ,

-
the door for a c o m e o n for ginks that w as lookin to b e ’
properly crowned and E d usta run a d s in The D emocrat

,
tellin these b lo b s what w a s screwy about their makeup and

’
how they d b een b umped b y other hat guys w ith the wrong
’
steer and he doped it that when they w a s o u t for c las s in

,
b ean covers to visit

R yn a the ha tte r
Th a t
’
s wh '
a t s th e m a tte r .
A nd from th t innocent b g i i a e nn n
’
sport has sprung up
, ,
the b ig herd of ad w riters that uses poetry in these days to

k nock business .
In them times H i r s c h l D e b a t t i e s o l d
stogie twofers that you cou l d inhale witho u t
s l ap p i n
’
a plaster on the b ack of your me e k .
Now you get sac k ed for a thi n dime for a

fireproof torch that no old time democr a t -
would hand to a repu b lican even at a ,
nationa l election .
D octors prescri b ed quinine powders with whis k ey for

the grippe and lotsa guys got s o s they could ta k e the
,
’
whis k ey without the quinine— after a little practice Now .

’
d ays the b ugs gargle white mule that tastes worse th an

quinine without the whis k ey b ut carries a sti ffer wa l lop , .
W hen the guy with the scythe fel l down on the j o b

in the old days tight old codgers kept s t i c k i n around j ust
,
’
to k id the fol k s that w as achin for the k nocko ff s o s they ’ ’
could shoot h i s j ac k N o w d a y s an operation i s framed and

.
’
the tightwad gets the s k iv .
S am L ucas came to town with the H eyer S isters and ,
made a hit singin Grandfather s Cloc k

“ ’
Fo lk s said that ’
.
song was more n fifty years old at that time N ow when the
’
. ,
Rotary and Kiwanis c l u b s want to liven up they wind ,
80
Grandfather s Clock or clin k water glasses fo r that other

’
“ ”
old timer J ingle Bells, .
N ot t h r o w i n the hammer understand but some guy

’
, ,
’
on your sheet is short changin on market reports Course
-
. ,
you re k een on L iverpool grain Chicago bull and S t L ouis

’
, , .
mule b ut P eoria has b l o o i e d

,
In the old days standin out .
,
’
like b reakfast eg g on a t r av e l i n man s chin was the Peoria ’ ’

,
market W hi skey steady and unchanged , That ,
’
wasn t for a shot nor a drugstore short pint but , ,
for a gallon of bourbon that a guy could s wo l l y without

’
s t r a n gl i n .
your hunch sport—boost the town as the great

H ere s ’
,
e s t market for hooch white mule an d home b rew Tell the

, , .
world our leggers stretch a gallon of Johnny Walker to five

’
gallons by dopin it with rai sin soup and alk that our moon ,
shiners make fiv e year squirrel in fi ve days and our good

-
,
lookin k itchen chemists distil knockout dan d elion wine in

’
two weeks .
B ein as them birds at the city hall h as stoppe d Volstead

’
and come clean for wine and brew the stage i s s e t for a ,
b ig killin ’
.
Y ou newspaper b oys may b e leery a b out p l ay i n the car ’
toon and the harpoon but you kin put plenty of sm o ke on

, ,
them hoo ch market reports without bein called on the carpet ’

.
81
T HE M WA S T HE GOOD OLD DAYS
C p i n W l r Bl i r
a ta a te a
’
s Pa l l S mbo
a tia te a a t.
Wh r e C y Pr
e Tri -
it es s C l u h ld fr ol c
b e i .
82
u u
T e d Ne h a s in B lva L ock wo o d Co u m
e st e.
84
THE M WA S THE GOO D O LD DAYS
heel road to freedom naturally the gallant young s o j e r s ,
of C ompany B lin ed up for her They arranged a whang .
doodle torchli g ht p e r c e s s i o n for that gal that b eat anything

ever put over for Cleveland and H endricks or Blaine and
L o gan with all their marchin clu b s fla m b e au clubs drum
,
’
, ,
corps tin caps oilcloth capes leaky k eros e ne torches and

, , , ,
mounted hic k s from Blue Grass and the corn belt .
That s when them O le and A xel marchin clu b s from

’
- -
’
Moline was shipped o ver in cattle cars with gales b urg s n o o s ,
and t heir full d i n n e r p a i l lanterns to misstep in the parade

-
,
and y ammer in march time “

P l aine ! Plaine ! Y am e s Y ee ,
” ’
Plaine ! Them s the guys that put t h e indian sign on the
Plumed Knight and Blac k E agle .
When C ompany B started anything they always fin

i s h e d and them s o j e r s went t h e r o u t e for B elva— d o llin in
’
o
regular Belva style with long dresses s t e e l fr a m e corset s , , ,
b anged hair poke b onnets and b alloon bustles E x c e p t i n

,
-
, .
’
actresses wimmen in them times didn t smear the powder

,
’
,
’
paint and calcimine use the lipstick and fight the lookin
, , ,
glass like they do now .
H i gh p r i v at e H arry Fulton was the ace that played the

Be l va part and that bird showed top class as a leader with
, ,
four prime pippins — Clyde Riley Brick O g den Vic S kiles , , ,
and S o j e r D avis —as escorts Then came Private Ted N eu .
haus Belva s r un n i n mate the lady candi d ate for vice pr es

,
’ ’
,
-
ident and Ted was the swelle st dressed t ri m m i e in t h a t

.
turnout P rivate L i b Graham w as next in line as the lady

.
,
drum maj or t w i r l i n a kitchen broom for b aton and d i r e c t i n

,
’ ’
S t r a s s e r s full band all ri bb oned and pinked in comi n out

’ ’
-
,
dresses .
The o fficers headed b y P rivate L itz W arriner a s fl a g

,
b earer trailed the band Captain E d C ameron and L i e u t e n

, ,
ants B illy M c Cul l o u g h and B illy Gil b ert doin female mi l i ’
tary duty with hoopskirts wide s p r e ad i n opera hats and

, ,
-
’
,
b ustles The First B i g Four a quartet of cornfed huskies

.
, ,
followed— Charlie Coen B illy S t r o e h l e Bo b Russell and , , .
Billy P urcell The In s ide Four that ast no odds from no

.
,
b ody came next— Johnny Quinn E d Randolph E arl Nichols

, , , ,
and Bump Mossman Then the S aw e d o ff Four squatty . ,
85
and quic k s t e p p i n -
S nell Jim Kough Fran k Valen
’ — Fran k
, ,
tine and J ohnnie M c G e e

,
.
T here wasn t a pi geon b reast on the roster of privates

’
-
that wore dresses and carried j ap lanterns and umb rellas to -
ma k e the march for B elva — only sturdy gladiators like ,
Frank P armele E d Kough S am L a fferty E mi l H ass H er

, , , ,
man S tolle C harlie O sborn D alt Risley Max Ro b inson Ca p

, , , .
White B illy D avidson C harlie C ameron L ee Clar k Billy

, , , ,
O akes Cli ff Reid Charlie H ub b ell Billy S peer D an L yon

, , , , ,
A l Muc kle L ay t A ckley Jake Matteson Frank P orter Roy

, , , ,
Matthews Tom H anley E noch Wood Jim Gannon Vinc e

, , , ,
D organ Cap N elson M orr is Fort John H elmic k George

, , , ,
C urtis George D avis Bert D urfee B en Garrett Ike Gray

, , , , ,
Billy D evinney E r v Kemmerer Frank M itchell Chet Pratt

, , , ,
Jim Ro b eson O tto S mith John S treeper Jake Matteso n

, , , ,
A l S horey L ew Wild Billy Carney Johnny M c G e e Mar

, , , ,
tin O akes Max Robinson M eese Berg Bo b Kulp John

, , ,
'
D olan Fran k Taylor George Jones George E ldridge George

, , , ,
Fay D octor J immy To m son and Pus L e Cl ai r e

, , .
Visitors from the country j ammed the streets and Bar ,
n um s
’
circus and hippodrome never b rought more parade
bugs to town A fter marchin the downtown streets all lit up
.
’
,
with greek fire and fireworks the parade h alted at Third and ,
Perry where Belva delivered a most m a g n o l i o us address on

,
’
Woman s Rights lefts and uppercuts from the balcony of
, , ,
the old C entral hotel Tha t famous speec h aint never been .
equaled in any political campaign to this day even by ,
George S cott Buck H aman n Billy Maines W i l l u m O

, , , .
S chmidt L ew R o d d e w i g H arry M c Farl an d or any other

, , ,
memb er of the silver tongued order of spread eagles - -

.
M ebb e you b oys aint next that C ompany B was the

whole smear and w hen b ig stuff needed a push they was in
,
the game up to their elbows The military b all at M etropoli .
tan hall made a bigger stir with the natives than Bobby
’ ’
B u rn s s festival the Volunteer Fireman s masquerade or the
, ,
East D avenport Turnverein ka ffeeklatch

’
.
S ome big guns hooked up with the B o u t fit — men like

General L yman Ban k s Colonel H enry E g b ert Colonel Park , ,
M c M a n u s Colonel George French Maj or Morton Marks

, , ,
86
THE M WA S THE G OOD OLD DAYS
Maj or George M c Cl e l l an d and L ieutenant A ugust Reimers ,

.
When them old war hosses S po k e f o lks too k notice The .
B b oys usta drill in the old mar k et house and later they ,
b uilt the armory now g h q for the L egion b oys

, . . . .
W h y sport when the state o ffered a stand of a r ms a s a

, ,
prize to the two b est drilled companies one from each -

,
b rig a de C ompany B copped in the first b ri gade right o ff the

,
reel They then challenged the Governor s Grays of D u b uque

.
’
,
second b rigade winners and cleaned em in j i g t i m e at Mar ,

’
s h al l t o w n.They taught a lota new tric k s to the Rodman

Rifles of Rock I sland and when the National Rifles of Wash
,
i n g t o n b arnstormed the West the B b oys escorted em on

’
their vi s it to the A rsenal and too k charge of a ffairs at their ,
exhi b ition dri l l at the Fair grounds .
W hen the crepe hangers from the hi gh grass counties

- -
put prohi b ition over things loo k ed awful dry for the B b oys
,
as they strapped on their k napsac k s and headed for the

encampment at Centerville But the night b efore startin a .
’
coup l a wet s o j e r s was i n h al i n b rew and pretzels at Frahm s ’ ’
and m o u r n i n over the dry outlook with H enry Frahm when

’
that good old scout tipped em on how they could save a few ’
lives out in the desert country .
O n the second day in camp two truc k s with barrels

mar k ed B eattie s X X X H ard W inter Wheat F l our rum b led
’ ”
into B headquarters and when them b arrels was tapped with

,
a wooden faucet liquid flour with a white collar b u bb led out

into tin cups and the b i g drouth at the encampment was
,
b usted .
T h e Captain passed samples of that flour to the o fficers

of the other companies and B g h q w a s the popular spot , . . .
of C enterville Then the Cap got mildly inoculated with

.
fl uid flour and the b right idea of givin a b anquet to the ’
regimental o fficers Callin P rivates Joe Frazer and George

.
’
Gi l lette he told em the v i s i t i n o fficers had a wea k ness for

'
’ ’
fried chic k en as well a s for Be attie s X X X fl our and he ’

’
kinda hinted that a y al l e r l a g ranch a mile down the pi k e

loo k ed li k e pushover p r o w l i n ’
.
In them days J oe Frazer flash S peeder of B Company , ,
could do a hundred yards in ten flat wi th Chet Cr o u l hold ,
87
THEM WA S T HE GOOD O LD DAYS
ing his g erman silver -
stop watch b ut nobody
-
ever pegged
,
George Gillette a s a cuc k oo collins s p r i nter

Th e m two .
s o j e r s made location on that hennery penetrated the first ,
line defenses of the Rhod e Island reds and they were j ust ,
b b i some plump three poun d pullets when a shotgun

’
g r a n -
explo d e d from the direction of the farmhouse and a b uc k ,
shot barrage splattered all over that c o o n fr u i t cafeteria .
Private Joe had practic ed startin with the pistol shot ’

,
and won first dash outa that hencoop b ut b efore he covered ,
twenty yards a pair of b roomstic k s in s o j e r s uniform ’
streaked past him and when P rivate Joe finished the mile
,
run to camp he found P rivate George s n o r i n soundly in ’
h i s tent g r i p p i n a bunch of rooster t ai l f e at h e r s in his hand

’
.
,
A t court martial next m o rn i n it was b rought out that

-
’
P rivate George bolted the henhouse at nine fift e e n and -
reache d camp at nine ten b e at i n Father Time for the record

-
,
’
by five minutes A t the b anquet that evenin the o ffi cers

.
’
of the First Regiment I N G enj oyed spuds greens b eans

, . . .
, , , ,
’
and oratory with B eattie s X X X flour as a s ide dish
, .
O h boy ! Them wa s the good old days !

,
Hep ! Hep ! H ep i —h e p l — he pi
88
H o gl at i n , G i bb e ri s h , S l angu a g e .
In th e m times sport youn g sters was right pert when

, ,
tal kin h 0 g l at i n s o s folks couldn t get next to their dark

’
,
’ ’
“
secrets .Instead of a kid askin his buddy Will you come ’
,
with me ? he d s ay W i ge r y y o u g e ry c o g e r y w i g e ry me
” “ ’
gery ? in h o g l at i n— givin each word a soft final and addin

” ’ ’
“
the sound of gery for a bit of mysterious bolshevik flavor .
A fter passin fifth grade a kid could master gibberish

’
’
shiftin the first letter of a word to the end of the word
and addin the sound a y to the letter as I l l w ay o u y ay
’
, ,
”
o m e c ay i t h wa e m a y ? With them two foreign languages
y
schoolboys could prattle in secret right in front of their
dads .
N o w d ay s fl ap p e r s and shifters gabble a new lingo

’
,
called S lan g uage that gives our good old United S tates lady :
,
food some awful s c r am b l i n I m agine sport an old timer ’

. , ,
-
d r Op p i n into a picher show to read movie ads and rest his

’
dogs and gettin planted alongside a coupla worl d weary

,
’
-
little old wimmen—seventeen or eighteen years old— all fed

’
up on dancin love clothes vamps and pichers and d i s
, , , , ,
g u ste d with tiresome p eople and particularly parents The , .
gab b y bobb e d b londe i s givin first release of the trou b les ’
of herself an d a girl friend while shootin the circuit the night ’
b efore S he chatters fluent Slanguage and s h e m ay be either

. ,
a laundry queen a cigar packer or a h i sweetie

,
H er weary ,
-
.
b o bb ed b rune chum is a good e ar p l ay e r gettin this fir s t run ,

’
-
stu ff
We b loused into a n o s e b ag ge r y with a flat wheeler and -
a boi ler factory and they hit the dopesheet for the boston
,
chow that a goofy greaseball served as we listened in on their

feathers and clothesline scandal A kippy pair of oilcans . ,
I ll s ay ! S o we made the bl o w an d gave em the air and

’ ’
then crashed a j azz garden where a flock of s ub chasers and

- -
dumb doras were rattlin their dogs We lined up a b race

-
’
.
of Gol d stein strangle holders who were the cat s pa j amas -

,
’
and bee s knees—i i you went for there b l aah

’
I went goofy .
89
THE M WA S T HE GOOD OLD DAYS
S CAN DAL
!
WA L KE R T O M AT O NE C K EJ Q
over one toppy wally and while n e c k i n with him I gl i m m e d

,
’
P ercy f o x i n it with h i s new tomato and servin the app l e

’
,
’
sauce . S ome r u g s h ak e r for that b ell polisher S i s ! W oof ! -

,
“
Then I j azzed a whirl with a ca k e eater on parole -
,
b ut slu ffed him for a flu k y corn shredder with a flat tire who -
ditched h i s b o z ar k to do my corn c r ac k i n my dog k ennels -

’
,
-
gettin j ammed s o m e t h i n fierce

’
A lthough half pl astered
’
.
and h av i n a h i p o i l plant he was no cuddle cootie for he

’
,
-
,
hand l ed h i s ice tongs li k e I had T B-

Then we hooked . .
a dumb otis and scandal wal k er for the yellow d i m b o x and

- -
,
I b louse to the h o m e h o u s e to dingle dangle this dewdropper -
until t i m le to mattress Y e gods ! What a slow night !

.
No b ody loves me ! I h 0 pe it gets hot s o s I kin wear ,

’
my furs .
Now on the dead level sport— wouldn t t hat lingo

, ,
’
’
get a guy s goat ? A d m i t t i n times is changin and that a
’ ’
,
’
lota s p e e d h o u n d s is o p e r at i n on last year s license what ’
,
chance h as an old stager to wise up on an earful of this

new S language ? S a y b oy— he ll never get to first base
,
’
.
S UB CHAS E R
-
CA K E -
EA T E R B E L L P OL I S HER
' ’
90
T HEM WA S THE G OOD OLD DAYS
Good morning Brother A pple , exclaimed our y oun g

,
hero cheerily while slackening its pace and attemptin g to

,
str ike up an acquaintance with its chance fellow V oya g eur .
“ ”
Whither are we drifting ?
N ow the Real Fruit my dear children being toppy
, ,
an d of some class deigned no reply but tossed its head

, ,
grandiloquently in the autumn sunshine and sought a s wifter

current midstream in the erratic rapids .
Un d ismayed at this palpable rebuke the S cott County ,
A pple hurried to catch its new found friend and as the two -
, ,
travelers cut a dashing figure eight in a swirling eddy near

the D uck creek delta our young hero ,
snuggled insinuatingly alongside the

Real Fruit exclaimi ng j oyfully ,
My ! H ow us apples do float ! ”
A pples ! the Real Fruit retorte d

”
,
with great disdain drawing its e lf ,
proudly together and casting a wither

in g glance at our hero “
A pples ! Where do you get that
.
apple stu ff ? W h y yo u re not an apple - you re an onion !

,
’ ” ’
“
S ure t hing I m an apple urged our hero earnestly
,
’ ”
, ,
.
“
I m a S cott County A pple I was born and bred in old
’
.
S cott county on the ban k s of the Wapsie !

,
”
H uh ! the Real Fruit r e j o i n d e re d with fine scorn they

”
, ,
raise onions in S cott county— not apples ! That s where the ’
”
tall corn grows .
“
But I m a regular S cott County A pple all ri ght urg e d
’
our young hero with a hot flash of native pride and I m

, ,
’
on my maiden v o yage to P retzel alley

'
”
.
“
I wish you good luc k on your j ourney the Real Fruit ,
grum pily replied “

I m on my way to Missouri an d you ll
.
’
,
’
have to show me .
A nd at that moment dear children there was a great

, ,
s plashin
g and swishing in the water b ehind the t w o floating
apples Then a robust germ an carp in search of its morn
.
,
’
ing s morning espied the Real Fruit and with an appalling
, , ,
disregard of formality gobb led that haughty wayfarer into

,
i t s capaciou s maw after which it sank tranquill y beneath

,
92
T HE M WA S THE G OOD OLD DAYS
the surface to ho b nob with the menial D uck creek clam and
yellow bellied mudcat the back sliding c r awfis h the b l i n k e y
-
,
-
,
eyed turtle and the slithering s k ipj ac k

,
.
“ ’
Which reminds me of a lesson I learned on mother s
kn ee mused the S cott County A pple : N ever get gay when
”
,
‘
’
you re full of sunshine
’
Therefore it behooves me to slip
.
,
into the shallows and cut this sporting life on the gay deep .
S o little boys and ,
girls our S cott C ounty ,
A pple turned its nose

shoreward on approach
ing the bustlin g bur g of
Bettendorf A nd it also .
laughed immoderately as
it recalled the great d i s
c o m fi t u r e of its haughty
fri end the Real Fruit and the ignominiou s squelching of that
, ,
proud aristocrat .
But dear kiddi es the O ld Timer wishes to r e mind you

, ,
that there are many alluring pitfalls in this world to ensnare

the unwary Now when this S cott County A pple approached
. ,
shallow water it observed a flat bottomed scow man ned by

,
-
a Corkhill c l a m d i gg e r who for many moons had dili g ently

,
scrape d the murky D uck creek c l am b e d s in quest of the

elusive pearl of comm erce O n the approach of the Wapsie . ,
truant the clammer wi t h an e ur e k an expletive an d a j oyous

, , ,
“ ”
Welcome little stranger ! seized our young h ero u n c e r e
, _
m o n i o us l y by the suspenders and thrust it roughly into the

pockets of his trousers .
“
Woe is me ! the S cott C ounty A pple wailed
”
To .
think that I sidestepped a jonah turn on a raven ous carp only

to fa ll for the meal ticket fo r a hungry harp ! ”
When the C orkhill clammer stepped from hi s scow that

evening to prepare his luncheon he drew the S cott C ounty
, ,
A pple from his pocket rubbed its rosy cheeks aff ectionately
, ,
and smacked his lips hun g rily in anticipation of a royal feast ,
with our hero the complementary guest of honor sliced in ,
vine g ar as a s i d e c ar d to bacon flap j ac k s and spuds

, , , .
93
T HE M WA S T HE GOO D OLD DAYS
But Fate that uncertain mentor of our destinies had

, ,
decreed o t herwise in the a ffairs of this S cott County A pple .
A t that particular moment little b oys and girls a

, ,
H ebrew peddler came driving down the river road strok i ng ,
his sorrel whiskers complacently and humming a plaintive

yiddish lulla b y .Upon b eing hailed in greeting b y the C ork
hill c l ammer the y ah o o d ah replied O i yoi ! —with added
,
“ ”
-
ghetto gayety perhaps which reply unfortunately was m i s

, , ,
interpreted by the clammer as a reflection upon the valor and

integrity of his ancestors from old Kil
larney— a n a ffront which demanded i m
mediate redress .
H astily drawing the S cott County

A pple from his poc k et the Corkhill ,
clammer hurled it with violent impetus

at the itinerant commercial salesman ,
who alert to the occasion having s u s

, ,
p e c t i n g ulterior designs on the part of

the clammer qui c kly po k ed out his fin
,
and speared our young hero a s it sailed swi ftly and unerringly
through the gathering twilight .
Then lashing his spavin into a quick trot the H e b rew

, ,
peddler drove homeward at full speed to the bright lights ,
of P retzel alley where he su b sequently was greeted by his

,
numerous family with many manifestations of a ffection a s he

displayed our blushing young hero wreathed in smiles in, ,
the palm of his good left hand .
“
A t last I am in Pretzel A lley sighed the S cott C ounty
,
A pple while being sliced into the frying pan with a ration of
,
-
porkchops “but I have a hunch that I shall soon s e e my

,
finish .
A nd thus it came to pass dear children that the S cott

, ,
County A pple paid the penalty that Fate exacts of the verdant
bohun k who falls for the glare and glimmer of the b right
lights of the gay commonwealth or P retzel alley .
Moral : If the Irish or the D utch don t get your nan nie ’
you have a fat chance with the Jews .
94
E nough i s S u ffish .
Wh e n y ou r pu i n g on p r y ’
e tt a a t ,
I f y ou h uff h c h r use t e s t t at ee s,
Wh h g uzzl i ng l i k
y t e wb m e a s te -
u
T i ! y ou r ou d up r '
h
!
e s se to t e ea s ?
Wh i l e d i i ng a i ul i o n
m tt st m a t
Wi ll cc n u d ir a e t a te es e
An d p e p
-
up th e o ld af fla t u s ,
H ow
ou h n d y fi ? a b t t e e xt - a re
For h l w of co m p n i on
t e a e sat
T k i oll i m pl co r
a es ts t n a e s e
Wh n h e w i nh l m ny
t e s te a es to o a
O f h h ooc h h n i gh b fo r
t e t e t e e .
I f li l b i i pl n y
a tt e t s e t ,
Wh y — O w h y — w h ol l m or , a e o t e ?
lf y ou p ly n k l
ha v e a s ha e a e
A d b u om
n i l k h o d c lf
a x s -
se a ,
Wi h h i fi
t t id s h noop r r s t -a to t e s e ,
Wh y h d i z y h l u gh ?
t at z tee ee a
i f i ncl i n d b clo h i m pl
e to e t es -
s e
A d y ou f r l y b low y our j c k
n ee a
F o rh d ud t h e fl h h wi h b on s t a t as t e s e
A d h p i m pl o n h b c k
n t e es t e a
Wh n h rou gh n c k p d d w
e t e e u an o n e r
L oo k y ou ov r d o n s or e ,
'
t ge t s e ,
For h cu i y ful p d d l r
t e t e e e e e
H n o li c n for ro r
as e se a a .
if l i l b i i pl n y
a tt e t s e t ,
Wh y — O w h y — w h ol l m or , a e o t e ?
95
Th e C arniv a l Ci t y M in s t re l s .
Come on sp o rt ! Pu sh the clock ,
back a r i p v an wi n k l e notch or two

to the days of O ld H oss H oey an d
E zra Kendall ; b ac k to the old days
of Barlow W ilson Primrose and , , ,
West ; back to the days of Billy

Em erson s minstrels S am L ucas ’
, ,
and Billy K e r s an d s ; back to the

days when S eth Crane and Fay
Templeton san g the Go b ble son g
“ ”
in the Mascot ; when D an H o m e

“
and Ferd H ay m e y e r pleased the

’
folks at B ur n s s ball wi th their
song an d danc e s p e cialty S t ro l - -
ling Throu g h the Park .
Them w a s the good old days ! A ll wi d e open an d ever y

thin g an d none of these crepe hangers o n crabbin duty
,
-
’
.
L et s s e e —that song warbled s o m e t h i n like this :

’ ’
Wh i l e st ro rou gh h p rk
llin
'
th t e a one day .
On e lov l y f r noon i M y
e a te n a
w k n by urpri
as ta e s se
By a p i r of ro gu i h y a s e es (p a us e !
b y h fo n i n i pa rk
,
An d w m e h e t e r t e u ta n th e .
S ome class to that b o ! Georgie C ohan nor Irv B erlin

,
aint got nothin on nobody in ar r an g i n them kin d of words

’ ’
,
h as they ? Then the dance —a sort of cu b ist non com clo g -

,
with r o l l i c k i n raggy swing N o w—second spasm

’
, 0 boy ! . ,
l y r a i s d our h a t s
We i m m e d a y u t — -
e
fon d
r pl i d
,
An d -
a- ly s he e e
n v r h ll for g
.
e e s a e t
T h lov l y f h noon (p a u ! at e a ta -
se
Wh n w m h b y h foun i n i h p rk
,
e e e t er t e ta n t e a .
S ay ! D id them guys get a hand ? L isten sp ort—you ,
know what they re f d i n these movi e b irds that d oes happy

’ ’
ee ,
’
endin bunk in t h e pichers in the applause line ? W ell th at ll , ,
’
kin d a give you some idea of what they gave D an an d H a y i n

the old days only it aint one two s i x
,
- -
.
97
the evenin breeze out in the parks on moonlight nights

’
.
O thers wa s musically inclined an d took their reven g e out on

,
di fferent kinds of wind instruments S till others w as a ff licted

.
with declamatory delusions rangin from tragedy to comedy

,
’
.
’
U nderstand spo r t the motor cop hadn t arrived then
, , ,
’
and the ordinances wasn t so sensitive and easy to fracture as
’
now .Folks wasn t s o particular a s to noises like the cut ,
out the short skirt o r the j azz t ro t t e ry

,
-
, .
The first release of the Carnival City Cul l ud C omedians

was staged in the town hall of D ixon on Than k sgiving eve ,
in N ovember eighteen ninety four The excuse for pickin

,
-
.
’
on D ixon for the pop o ff play has never b een al i b e d but the
-
,
frost was on punk uns all through the first part

-
.
But s u m p i n happened durin g the wind u p that made -
’
em cut loose The l i gh t i n system consisted of one j uicy
.
’
kerosene drop lamp hangin over the front of the stage Th i s

-
,
’
.
g lim was billed for a crab play layin d own on the j ob durin ,
’ ’
the grand finale But S o j e r D a v i s the manager of props

. , ,
roved up in the pinch G b i a i k stepladder he

’
p b n t
r a . r
q ye ,
mounted it and quickl y adjusted the lamp trouble but as ,
he leaned too heavy on one sid e he took a tailspin down o n ,
the leader of the orchestra .
The rubes thou g ht that lofty

tumble gag all in the play .
It was the h i gh s i gn for the

firew orks and they broke loose ,
with applause i n d i c at i n that the ,

’
hic k i s keen for athletic stu ff The .
other acts wer e greatly enj oye d ,
and then t h e hall was cleare d and ,
everyb od y da nced t ill m o rn i n ’ ’

~
.
If good old Joe Miller had

been at D ixon he would have felt ,
repaid for the labor on his original

wor k The chicken gag was used .
,
and it went over wi th as much

eff ect as in present day vaudeville -
.
L isten to this
1 00
Mr Fort . H ow is you fe e l i n
’
this evenin ’
,
Mistah S am
”
sing ?
Mr S ampson . Why I se fe e l i n ve y salu b rious this ,
’ ’ ’
evenin Mistah Fo t ; ve y salu b rious

’
,
” ’ ’
.
“
Mistah S am s i n g I d e s i ah to p 10 p o un d a c ul u m d u m f o,
’
you h e ah this evenin b efore this l ah g e i n t e l l u m g e n t auj e n c e

’
,
”
.
“
Go lon g man you cain t compo u nd no c l um b l u m what
’
, ,
’
I cain t e d i fic at e
’
D eed yo cain t n i ggah No s uh !
.
’ ” ’ ’
, . ,
“
Ve y well Mistah S a m s i n g ve y well What I s gw ine
’
, ,
’
.
’
f o to ask is Why do a chic k en cross de road ?

’ ‘ ’
Why do a chicken cross de road ? Y ah ! Y ah ! Y ah !

‘ ’
D at c uh t a i n l y am too easy M istah Fo t— too easy ,

’
.
“
Ve y well Mistah S am s i n g ve y well
’
, Then tell these ,
’
.
h e ah good people right h e a h in D ixon why dat chicken he

, ,
”
done cross de road .
D at chicken Mistah Fo t he done cross de road b e k as e

,
’
”
he has a most i m p o t an t i n ga g e m e n t on de o t h eh side
’
.
The interlocutor— M r James L indley the sweet voiced

“
. ,
-
S cott county nightingale will now favor the audience with ,
that b eautiful b allad entitled L ittle D arling D ream of M e , , .
The artists in the fi rst part :

Interlocutor— E ugene A Craft . .
Bones— Frank Wilson and Gus

Brown Tambo s— James S a m pson
.
and Frank Fort .
The songs and the sin g ers

were : O bli ge a L ady Frank ,
Wilson “
. L ittle D arling D ream ,
of M e , James L indley “
Do . ,
D o My H uckleberry D o C harl es
,
”
,
Brow n .
“
L ittle D arling Good ,
b ye Martin O a k es
”
.
“
Chri stopher .
Columbo ”
Gu s Brown
,
“
S ilver .
Bells of M emory William D ewey

”
, .
“
Annie L auri e ”
E ugene C raft , .
Put on de Golden S ho e s Jam es ”

,
S ampson .
The features of the second part

Charlie Brown in refined song and dance , Frank Wilson - -
. ,
1 01
in a b rief discourse on political events H ugo H ill and Tony .
Biehl the musical team

, Gene Craft and Fran k Fort in
.
“
The M erry Fa k ers James L ind l ey and M artin O akes in
.
popular melodies W i ll iam D ewey and Gus Brown in

.
“
Wanted — A n A ctor L ew E c k hardt Fran k Wilson James
.
, ,
L indley and Martin O a k es in old time plantation melodi e s

,
-
.
The L i n d e l l o Mando l in clu b H ugo H ill Torn O B r i e n John

, ,
’
,
E m e n d o r f e r L ew E c k hardt Tony B iehl and Juie P urcell

, , ,
.
Grand finale O n the Bowery featuring L ew E c k hardt a s

,
”
,
S amantha J o h n s i n g assisted b y G u s Brown Fred H o e l m e r

, , ,
S o j e r D avis Tom O B r i e n and the active chair warmers

’
-
.
, ,
The show went b ig and a return date w as signed for

,
o p enin
’
of the new opera house in the spring D urant w as .
the scene of the second performance of the Carnivals in ,
D ecemb er and the home fol k s stood the ga ff at the Burtis

,
in January . Blue Grass and Bu ffalo were nailed b y the

troupers in February It was up to the good people of L e
.
Claire to throw a wrench into the wor k s in Fe b ruary as they ,
framed a revival against the Carnivals on a night when the ,
thermometer hit twenty degrees below h e r o The m instrel “
b oys declared the a ffair a draw c l ai m i n a fift y fift y split in ,

’
-
the contest b etween b lac k face and salvation .
Meantime mi nstrelsy was get ,
tin in its wor k and a number of

’
,
prominent citizens fell before i t s

ravages A nd among others such . ,
artists as Maj M eyer H enry Gar ,
stang Bo b Abb ott Bill Fran k lin , , ,
Bob Kulp Charles E v e r h e ar d Bo b , ,
O sb orne H arry D owner Fran k , ,
H earne Willy Mueller and the , ,
Moline famous Bi g Four— Weber ,
S amuelson Crimmins and B ier , ,
man The Carnivals entertained

.
in Moline in eighteen ninety fi v e -

.
The final perfo rm a nces were

given at S chuetzen park on July ,
’
fourth afternoon and evenin I n , .
1 02
Th e T an k To wn Tro up e rs .
U T j ust a minute sport This tale also has

, , .
s o m et h i n
’
to do with another band of wan
derin blackface minstrels that invaded the
’
b ucolic bailiwick of S olon— u p y o nder in

Nort hern Iowa—about thirty years ago b y ,
request for one consec u tive n ight T hat

, .
was long before it b ecame ne cessary for

our leadin citizens to study chemistr y and ’
’
learn the distiller s trade .
O f course nearly every male citiz e n ,
over twenty years of age in any respectable community at ,
some ti me in h i s career has felt the bite of the minstrel bug

, ,
an d under the m e l l o w i n influence of time he fancies he h as

’
been a regu lar performer D avenport h as growed a big crop .
of minstrel artists in the past forty years .
O n that occasion S olon s population was closin in on

,
’ ’
th e four fi g u r e mark and s p r o u t i n city airs

-
O ne live wire ’
.
of that burg S eth S mith allowe d it was time to build an

, ,
o p r y house and b y j ing he went and done it

, , ,When it wa s .
finished and the benches s e t in place it needed some scenery ,
to give it a touch of realism .
Charley Kindt a sprightly young blade in h i s early

,
twenties was hooked by S eth for t h e scene p ai n t i n and h e

,
’
,
put over a b angup j ob A fter i n s p e c t i n the work the man

.
’
,
ager was so well pleased that he released a hard luck serial -
that touched a tender spot with the scene painter .
Now S olon in the lingo of the p e r f e s h w as a tan k town

, , ,
well o ff the main line not covered by leg i t and rep shows
, .
The manager wanted a live attraction for the grand o p e n i n ’
the next S aturday—a show with lotsa pep .
Charley right o ff the bat told the S o l o n i t e that a fir s t

, ,
class minstrel performance with silver cornet ban d.and street ,
parade at noon was what S olon needed for an opener—a show

,
that would go over with a bang and furnish the natives with
ta l k food for y e ar s t o come _ .
1 05
The day b ein

Wednesday speed w as needed to corral a
’
troupe to invade S olon on time but

as D avenport was b r i m m i n over ’
with b lac k face talent Impresario ,
Kindt k new where to uncover the

best The S O S call went out . . . .
,
Joe M i l ler s j oke b oo k was dusted ’
o ff costumes gathered performers , ,
drafted wigs and burnt cork were ,
requisitioned an d railroad passes ,
secured on a slow freight That .
outfit included some high class -
performers vocalists and musicians , ,
who later hit the highspots .
L ew Greeley H orne did the o l d

dark ey stu ff and sang O ld Blac k ,
”
Joe Greeley w a s as good a s .
Mi l t Barlow and he had refused many o ffers to ta k e the road

, .
Greeley went s o good that he h a d t a sing I L ove to Thin k of

“
the D ays W hen I W a s Y oung for an e ncore

”
.
Mel Trotter made h i s de b ut with his sweet s o u n d i n

’
-
,
tenor voice singin The L ittle O ld Red S hawl My Mother

,
“ ’
Wore and for encore The Prodigal S on the song that

,
”
,
”
, ,
Bill Nye wrote for Thomas Q S ea b roo k e in The Isle of

“
.
C hampagne one verse r u n n i n s u m p i n li k e

,
’
Oh , th e e ld es t son was a so no fa g u n ,
He was ! He was !
u
H e s h ffl e d t h e a ds and he c r a ed mon pl y for ,
He did ! He did !
He wor
e a re d nc
e k t i e , a hi h s ta di
'
a , g n n coll r
-
n w
We t o u t i t h t h e b s , g o t oya n d did h e full oll r
r gul r n y loll r
,
O h h e wa s a e a j im da d e
ng
,
Si t ra l a l a l a l a l a l a !- - - - - -
Tony Biehl a s the D utchman Gus Wilson as the S wede , ,
and L ee Grabbe as the Professor put ov e r a screamin musi ,

’
cal act usin every instrument they could beg borry and
,
’
, ,
steal from D inny H ickey .
Bill Korn made his first plunge in monolo g takin for ,

’
h i s text that good old gag of Joe Mil l er s a b out the guy with
’
“ ”
his slops on who as t M ike the copper What time i s it ? ,
“
It just struc k wan says M i k e givin the stew a whac k on
, ,
’
1 06
The company carried its own orchestra—a n old ti me -
square pian o — b o r r y e d from D enny H ic k ey of the H oyt piano

company O n account of a fiv e dollar freight bill that piano
.
-
was left at S olon and meb be i t s still doin busin ess there
’ ’
.
,
B ecause of the short time between b o o k i n and S how time ’

-
,
rehearsals was held in the little red caboose on the freight

train and the postin serv i ce consisted of h andin out five
,
’ ’
hundred dodgers .
When th e troupe arrived every s o n o fa gu n and his broth er ,
turned out to s e e the b ig street parade at noon with silver .
cornet b and plug hats linen dusters and bamboo canes

, , , .
Sh ortly before the performa nce it was discovered tha t the

programs had not been printed and as the printer had clos ed ,
his S hop and gone fi s h i n the o ffice was bro k en into an d C h ri s

’
S chlegel s e t the type and Charli e Kindt run the programs on

the hand press The next m o rn i n the .
’
pr i nter flashed a bill of two bucks for

material and u s e of type and Fred ,
Coates paid the bill a year later .
A s the m i n s t r e l company entered

i
the cab o o s e for the return trip M att ,
L amb lingered on the station platform

and as t one of the natives
Well how d you like the S how ? ”
,
’
’
Guess we hadn t better talk about
that w a s the reply , .
N o w d ay s i t s di fferent in p u t ti n
’ ’ ’
on a minstrel show Whenever the E lks .

,
E agles Caseys M oose M asons O wls , , , , ,
Camels Turners or any of them b rother , ,
outfits gets the b lackface fever they wire a canned mi nstrel

, ,
promoter for costumes scenery ma k eup and mu s ic Then

, , , .
,
after they lasso Tad Martin they re all s e t A nd bein all ,

’
.
,
’
s et, special committees l e a d p i p e friends and foes for program

a d s and reserved seat tic k ets Then the news p apers say t h e .
S how w as fin e r n silk— that every b ody is just d y i n to hear

’ ’
’
em repeat the dose .
O ilst o ck salesman ain t the only guys that spread that old
’
mexican stu ff sport , .
1 08
S t re e t M u s i c a n d C at arrh .
E HADbully music b ack in the old days

sport before the marim b o xylophone, , ,
’
saxophone and uke got jammi n up the ,
wor k s and not c o u n t i n the o c ar i n o tin

,
’
,
whistle or j ewsharp nor solo work with , ,
the triangle tam b ourine or bass drum

_
, ,
.
When the S wiss bell ringers showed at -
’
the Metropolitan hall the standin room
S ign w as stuc k up for the fir s t time
\
Professor Martini had the folks all diz

zie d wi th his sleight o i hand tricks at the Metropolitan too
- -
, ,
an d when he mesmerized the little gal dressed in a white

suit with boys pants and ruffles at the k nees and put her
,
’
,
to sleep up in the air with her head restin on her hand

,
’
,
b al an c i n on her el b ow on a broomstick he had the town

’
,
g as p i n and w o n d e r i n
’
Then Martin Greeley named a coc k
’
.
tail i n honor of Martini with lotsa hop to it and the folks , ,
with classy tasters an d jaded appetites gave that M artini

drink an awful play .
Jo e E mmett showed h o w easy it was to pla y H ome ,
S weet H ome with variations on the toy harmonica at the

”
B urtis and the nigger heaven ki d s cleaned out the stock of

,
-
mouth organs at H oyt s and Wallace s music stores the

-
’ ’
next day .
General Tom Thumb and Miss Mi n nie Warriner the ,
world s smallest midgets w ere the b i g attractions then and

’
, ,
M iss Mi n ni e held a pu b lic reception after every matinee to ,
meet the wi mmen folks .
The old b ear man and his b i g brown b ear came to town
every sum m er The bear man usta sleep with hi s b ear in a
.
boxstall back of D eutsches Gasthaus on S econd and S cott .
H e calle d the bear Chack and b e controlled him with a

“
,
clothesline fastened to a ring i n his nose When old bruin .
shimmie d the bear man sang a weird dago chanty :

,
1 09
T HEM WA S T HE G OOD OLD DAYS
Ta -
t a, t a -t uu m m
. t a ru u
-
, ra - r a y !
Ta -
ra , ra - ru u m , ra - ru u m f ra - ray !
The bear danced a cl um s y sidestep actin like he was ,

’
scared sti ff The b ear man got lotsa pennies when passing
.
“
the hat and he usta s ay For a fift a cent
, ,
- -
I ma ke a Chack climb a tree but they ”

-
,
wasn t no spendthrifts S hootin four bit

’ ’
-
p ieces in them days .
N ob ody knew who starte d the b oys

p l a y i n the accordeon but if a gu y strolled
’
,
west of H arrison on hot summer e v e n i n s ’
he d hear Fran k W i c k l e m an or some other

’
b arb er pumpin the L auterbach waltz or

“ ” ’
”
Fatherland outa a b e e r h ar p O r he d . ,
’
get an earful of a t i n k l i n zither and k now ’

,
the Tyrolean war b lers had been v i s i t i n Turner hall or Claus ’
Groth and had started A l Fahrner Billy Wa g ner and a I ota

, , ,
other b oys r as p i n the z i t ’

.
Th e re was more rivalry between m usicians then than

b etween soprano soloists in church choirs If that aint s p i l .
’
lin a mouthful sport come up and get your money The
, , .
leadin b ass drum artists— G u s Wilson of R e s t o r ff s Military

’ ’
b and and Billy Carney of the L ight Guard band—were deadly

rivals and they fought a fierc e duel one S aturday evenin at
,
’
Moore s hall b efore a pac k ed house Charli e Wesenb erg was

’
.
second for G u s and M ike Ru e fe r acted for Billy with E rnst

, ,
O tto o fli c i at i n as referee
’
,
and Mike Goetsch as bot

tle holder The fol k s that
-
.
thin k they aint no melody

in bass drum solo wor k
i s due for wisin up on ’
their musical education .
Nasty f e e l i n exi sted ’
b etween them star drum

mers and the Carney fac
,
tion preferred charges against W ilso n c l ai m i n he manicured ,

’
h i s finger nails a n d played guitar at w e d d i n s

’
The Wilson .
1 10
noise chariot was passin the steeple he ’
tore loose with T his H ouse i s H aunted

“ ”
,
and Fatty came right b ac k wi th the Blue “
Bells of S cotland ta k in an awful W ham

”
,
’
at the high note on t h e b ell tuned in q

’
flat That punch of Fatty s had s o much
.
zip on it that S oapy smelled scotch and ,
when he w as passin Pat T u o h y s j oint he ’ ’
jumped o ff the c al l e y o p e and a s t Pat to

mix him a sti ff s n orter of scotch sayin ,
’
that the b um note that Fatty pulled on the bells gave him
the willies P at thought S oapy was easily n e r v o u s e d and as t
.
,
him how he d li k e to hear that note every day and twice

’
on S undays S oapy said no guy h ad t a stand for that pun

.
i s h m e n t when he had such a b eautiful chance to j u m p o ff the

bridge Then S oapy rem arked that as far as he was con
.
,
cerned Fatty won the b attle— that he d never fight another

,
’
duel with chimes that was tuned by a clam digger -

.
When the scotch bagpipers came to town in fair time -

,
dressed in kilts you could tell b y their knees they never took
,
water for a chaser The kid s usta folly them kilties around
.
when they played the saloons and could tell they were p l ay i n ,
’
music b ut couldn t get hep to the tunes every wheeze sound

,
’
’
in j ust the same Them hielan guys carried heavy campin
’
.
’
outfits on their backs and mu sta had a b un c h that p ro h i b i

,
’
tion was comin the way they practiced preparedness
, .
Professor G u c k e r t gave a mandolin and guitar concert

at the Burtis and the burg went da ff y on that t i nkly music
, ,
Jimmy D onahue b ein the first kid to tackle a mandolin ’

.
L ee Gra b be then organized the Venetian ma ndolin club with ,
mandolins guitars m andola b anj o flute violin and cello

, , , , , ,
’
,
and he had Tony Bi ehl G u s Wilson I k e Freed Fran k Fic k , , , ,
H enny Reese Charlie Ri bb y Al M o e t z e l J ohnny E m e n d o r

, , ,
fer H ugo H ill D oodle E ckhardt T o m O B r i e n and a lota

, , ,
’
other stars p l ay i n for the high class entertainments When

’
-
.
L ee tal k ed of o r gan i zi n a saxophone quartet in them days ’

,
folks said if things k ept gettin worse they d round that boy ’ ’
up for a b ugs recital b efore the commissioners .
1 12
Of
re g ular summer visitors
course ,
included h an d o r g an grinders with flea c o y -
ered monkeys that would climb for pen

nies and salute when they were dropped
in the cup Then the h an d o r g an grin d er
.
wo uld smile and s ay D a gooda monk ! ”

,
L ater the h urd y gurdy man came with the -
i
p p e o r g an on whe e ls and his wife and ,
family did the hat passin act -

’
.
Italian street bands made the round s

of this ol d town every summer p l ay i n violins flute and ,
’
, ,
’
harp on afternoons and e v e n i n s Them birds had the artis .
tic touch and plenty of pep and they played the fi d s in an ,
up ri ght position restin em on their knees

,
’
Kids fo l l y e d em
’
.
’
in d roves from M e l c h e rt s hotel to the S cott house and N ew

,
’
com b house but didn t get close when they passe d the hat
,
’
.
When them dagoes played in front of the Kimball house ,
if D octor Connaughton had his big white fedora white princ e ,
albert and habits on he d stand on the balcony an d toss em

, ,
’ ’
a silver dollar for every tune .
D oc C on was a catarrh moses— nearly everybody h av i n ’
catarrh in them days from readin the doc s monthl y paper ’ ’

,
The M edical Missionary If D oc C on couldn t relieve your

.
’
catarrh he could certainly make an awful

,
nick in your ban k roll O r you could take .

,
a chance with D oc M c A ff e e or Mrs D oc .
Keck and get a tumble for your catarrh

,
and y our coin gettin action two ways

,
’
fro m the ace A ll them catarrh fli m m e r s

.
wore bushy whiskers e xc e p t i n the M r s ,

’
.
D oc but her hubby sproute d a wilder

,
bunch of wind wh istlers than either Trade

S mith or his brother Mark D oc Con kept .
the microbes on the jump in his alfalfa by

’
usin a comb even if that was h u e kin the rul es of the doctor s
,
’ ’
union The only doc guy that had D oc Con on a barrel in

.
the whiskers line was D oc S pinney of S p i nn e y v i l l e sulp h ur ,
sp r ings the place that s now called L inwood

,
’
E very time .
1 13
T HE M WAS T HE G OOD OLD DAYS
D oc Con got a flash at D oc S pinney s whiskers he turned

’
g re en and then
, took a j ump o ff the wagon .
Them w a s the goo d old days sport ! No ,
square heads w a s t ry i n to S hoot constructive

-
’
criticism no oilcans s p r i n k l i n sugar on S liced

,
’
tomatoes no d u m b e l l s tippin bellhops to page

,
’
’
ern at banquets and you could get s i x beers ,
for a quarter But we had S l am m y O tters o n

.
”
h o l l e ri n
P
“
S he ’
car r go papers on
-
the -
post
-
o fli c e corner plenty of plain s o l d i e ri n at the

,
’
A rsenal and Bert Brockett i n t r o d uc i n floor

,
’
walkin and H arry M c L au g h l i n tendin the

’ ’ ’
silk counter at Petersen s O f course the men ’

.
,
fol k s was w e ar i n their vests b uttoned and sti ff

’
collars and neckties durin dogdays j ust like ’

,
they do in these b u s t l i n times S o w as the wimmen folks

’
.
against neck ventilation b ut since then they inherited a

,
coupla brains Business men han g to the old collar and

.
necktie though and no power on this green earth can tear

, ,
’
em away from the ha b its of the old paper collar days A s t -
.
any guy why he wears that j unk around h i s nec k on hot days
’
and he ll s ay i t s on account of his personal appearance
’
.
That punk ali b i o u g h t a get a b e e haw outa anything but a -
hard headed business man

-
.
1 14
T HEM WAS T HE GOO D O LD DAYS
old days when the y wasn t no fl i vv e r s

, A ll a guy needed ’
.
was to get t w o thirds pickled and drop into a bumpy hack

-
for a ride over the j olty macadam with D utch or Ugly , , ,
or Crumm y at the reins gettin a good c h u rn i n all down

, ,
’ ’
the line an d nature would do the rest— just as nature does

,
funny tricks to apple cider elderber ry wine and home , ,
b rew n o w d ay s for D avenport s leadin lady distillers Y ou

’ ’ ’
.
kin imagine what them rocky hac k rides would do to a

guy now if he d squirt some white m ule into his radiator
’
.
O r how ab out little old H o o p d e D oodle D an Keeler

,
-
from C ounty Kilkenny ? There w a s some worker S tarted .
g r i n d i n at four in the m o r n i n s and was always done at nine

’ ’
.
in the e v e n i n s L aid down the first pavin in D avenport

’
.
’
,
from Perry to S cott on Third street thirty fiv e years ago ,

-
,
and built the Main street sewer in all that quicksand when ,
fol k s said he d be ruined if it rained

’
D idn t rain for two .
’
m onths . A fter the j o b w a s finished it rained cats and dogs

for forty days and forty nights .
E very day after work H o o p d e D oodle would shoulder ,

-
a b room at qu i t t i n time and march his gang in S ingle file ’
’ ’
to Frahm s summerhouse and tap a coupla kegs Got s o s .
he could s a y “
E in b eer h o b b e n l u n c h m an in h i s choicest
, , ,
irish b r O g u e and he took lessons on S wiss w a rb l i n from

,
’
H enry Barmettler doin this kinda wor k : ’
Oh th e m oo n h cl i m b e
m ou n i n h i g h
,
Up th e ta
0 til ,
-
lb —y a -
e -
hoo !
O til -
lo —yi
-
e -
hoo !
cl i m b g
,
Un d h e hi h so
Til ! h e t ouch ht e sky

O til , l e— a y e h o o !
- - -
O , ay e ho o !
- -
O til -
l h
e a y -
e —t i l l — -
e o -
cc
—h !
, ,
Ti l l e a y e o o - - -
O t i ! l e —a y e h o o !
,
- - -
O til l a a y e h o o ! - - - -
O t i l l e a y e t i l l e —o —
,
- - - - -
c c
—
, ,
Ti ! l e a y e ~h o o ! - -
T i l l e — a y e — t i l l o— o e e
- - - -
A y e— o o o o o ! - - - - -
Folks wanted H o o p d e D oodle b r u n g u p b efore the com

'
missioners b ecause he b et everything he had i n c l u d i n h i s ,

’
1 16
TH E M WA S T HE GOO D O LD D AYS
un d erpants at ten to one that C levelan d woul d n os e o ut

,
- -
,
Bl aine in the presidential electi on Just a plain cas e of bu g s .

,
the y said H a d n t been a D emocrat elected in twenty fo ur

.
’
-
y ears . But when little H o o p d e D oodl e cashe d in for twent y -
fiv e thousand bucks them wise birds crosse d over an d says ,

’
that s a purty wise little mick .
O r how about old John Wunderlich the night school

, ,
hookey cop that usta chase the ki d s e v e n i n s when the y ha d ’
ni g ht school in the old hi g h school b ui l d i n at S ixth and ’
Main ? John could do a hundred yard s in ten flat standin ,

’
sta rt whenever he chased a kid for p l ay i n hooke y an d

,
’
,
he could s e e things around the corner with them ironbound

specs of h i s .
Y ou reporter guys keep p r i n t i n stories about big men in ’
this bur g these days but listen—y ou don t know what a real ,
’
big man i s .
’
There s a whole lot of old timers the fo l k s d rather s e e i n ’
your paper than them foreign guys kings queens and deuc e s , , ,
that you been ru nn i n ’

.
H ere s a bunch of likely old time lads that hain t never

’ ’
had their picher in your paper an d even if the y d idn t ne ver ,

’
sock much jack nor cut a fat ho g nor nothin they d stack up ’
,
’
’
better than some of them painful maps you b een ru nn i n
Chookie Ku p h al Ch o o n e r Burns Co o k t ai l Paulsen S lot
, , ,
R e up k e L eaky Tuohy Rooster S tapl et on B l i n k e y Murphy

, , , ,
L atel y C arl i n L ouse Mason L ime rick H opkin s S ti ff y

, , ,
S tewart S k ut c h L yons Jack C ass Bi g Jack an d L ittle Jack

, , , ,
D irty French Joe N e i b ri s c h D utch S t e e mle r Zip H ammerl y

, , , ,
Tob e Gilmartin S ki Peck Jim Peters B illy H o ge n k am p Jim

, , , ,
D rum g oole Chris J i p p C o oney Krebs S imon Koch Chr is

, , , ,
D ittmar L ew Pickens Luke O M e l i a Butch E ggers an d

, ,
’
, ,
C harlie Cable .
C ourse sport y ou y oung folks i s got it on the old times

, ,
i n s o me wa y s— mebbe !
Take h e at i n street cars for instance : O n c old winter
’
,
m o r n i n s i n the ol d d ays H enr y S c h n i t t g e r h e ate d h i s one hoss

’
-
,
b o bta i l car b y t h r o w i n a coupla armsful of fresh oats straw ’
o n t h e flo o r after D an M c G u g i n drove outa the Bra dy str e et
ba rn at the south co rner of Vander Veer park A guy h ad t a .
117
T HE M WAS T HE GO OD O LD DAYS
k eep tro m p in h is
dogs right smart to keep em from fr e e z i n
‘ ’ ’
a n d a c o a l o i l g l im done the l i g h t i n
'
.
A m a c h o o r c a rtoonists done funny pichers on the window

f r o s t i n when H enry stopped the b u s to wait for some bird that
’
whi s t l ed two bl oc k s aw ay The hoss shoo k a din k y b ell on .
h i s col l ar a n d fo lk s w a ited t o hear the b ell and then hollered

, ,
to H enry— i t b ein an hour b etween trips ’
But when D octor A llen strung trolley wires up Brady

street C a ptain Ga bb ert Jo b Ross Phil
, , ,
N agel J ohn Rowe G eorge Marvin John , , ,
Tem p le P J H agerty S am P erry Joshua , . .

, ,
Burr Joe L e Cl ai r e S am H urto Jim

, , ,
Croa k J ohn H aley A ndy B utler and , , ,
other wise hic k s lowed they co ul dn t

' '
s e e how no h o s s c a r wou l d pull itself up
Brady hill with a gosh d o m ed fis h p o l e -

.
O ld Mi k e W enzel operated the Third street line in the

same e ffi cient manner i n c l u d i n the hoof h e a t i n system
,
’
-
’
Now y o u young fol k s i s got electric light and heat a n d

' ' '
no w a i t i n an d still you re b e l l y ac h i n
, .
'
I n them d ay s wi m men t h a t didn t have children had hired
ga l s that done the wor k and w a shin for two b uc k s a wee k ’
and them ga l s wa s tic k led speechless with one night o ff ,
b ein Monday night ca l led Biddy s night Now the hired

’
-
'
.
gals i s cal l ed mai d s and m a ids i s lookin glass fighters and

'
-
, .
kn o w s more a b out D ou g l a s a n d Mary than corned beef a n d

ca bb a ge . M a ids sets a p ac e in dollin up that k eeps the
'
missus s t e p p i n But ma ids never u s e pun k perfume nor

’
fl a s h the i r teeth t r y i n to l oo k pur t y ’
Ga l s usta wear red fl an n i n s three sizes t o o large fi g ,
urin on them s h r i n k i n when they w a s washe d

’
N o w d ay s
’ ’
th e y we a r union suits b ut just to S how they aint muley , , ,
t h e y pl a y the g a me fi f t y fi f t y b y w e a r i n
'
o p en s h o p
-
waists
and c l oa k s T h e y wore one b uc k le over s hoes th en wi th
.
-
,
lon g w oolen dre s ses to k eep thei r legs warm N ow they .
wear g o l a s h e s and a whole floc k of b uc kles tin kl es j azz

,
t unes a n d wigw a gs nosey p a rties the stop loo k listen s ig n al - -

.
In them days a guy th a t too k a b ath any day except

S aturd ay go t hisself t a lk ed ab out H e too k h i s plunge i n a .
1 18
At the G ru m ble r s C am p
’
.
D on t ’
s fp o s e you reporters ever heard of the Gr umblers
camp down the river on S mith s island near L inwood in the ’
, ,
old days That roundup spot w a s opened by

.
B oney S trathman and his b rother L ew and

’
was goin full blast all the year round They ’
.
had a swell big shack and there was alw ays ,
plenty of fi s h i n and S hootin’

In them days ’
.
’
a guy could take his shootin iron and pot -
s o m et h i n be sides an english S parrow and he

’
,
could throw a line in the M ississippi and ketch s o m e t h i n b et ’
ter than german carp or the flu .
O ur greatest fre s h ai r sportsmen put in their spare time

at the Grumblers camp p l ay i n stud t u m m y checkers mum
,
’
, , ,
b l e d y p e g and other wild and e x c i t i n g a m e s Frank Brady ’

.
,
was the french chef and Buck K n i p h al s the dishwasher with

, ,
S awdust Billy and D uckfoot Malone doin chambermaid serv ’
ice. Nick Boy and George H alligan in charge of the com ,
missary k ept the old fi s h b o x ,
loaded with bass croppies , ,
and channel cat an d the ice ,
box filled with top sirl o in -

,
y al l e r l e g s and b acon Pro w , .
lin he n r oosts and orchards ’
wa s the popular moonli ght

sport at that camp Go o s h ie .
“
L ag i e was pilot on the Po
tato Bug the ski ff that carried chow and pale export over
,
’
from Max H o ff b au e r s l o gc ab i n at Bu ffalo .
H enry Jaeger George Mengel John H e n t zl e m an S oapy

, , ,
Matthes George H avens and Pete O tten the board of d i r ec

, , ,
tors had Jack S mith s steam b oat the Island Queen for
,
’ “ ”
, ,
pleasure c r ui s i n up and down the river when e n t e r t ai n i n

’ ’
their friend s an d enemie s and candidates for election o r ,
wh en t r i m m i n tinhorn s that thought they knew how t o

’
pla y t hat little game called poker .
121
O n S aturday Ignatz S chmidt would row down

e v en i n s
’
in his skow for the wee k end as that b oy loved to soa k -

,
the hee l of the pumpernic k el in b eefstea k

gravy for his S unday dinner H e always .
b rought his fid and when I g and Uncle ,
Johnny S auer sawed o ff their soulful duet ,
“
A ch d u L ieber A ugustin why even the
,
”
,
b irds in the trees were charme d Ignatz .
delivered the greatest po l itical S pe e ches

“
of his career to his distingu i shed fellow
citizens and showed up them prohi b ition
”
,
guys to a fa r e y e w e l l under the wi l lows ,
at the Grumblers camp whenever h i s ,
b e ar i n s got properly lu b ricated Many a S unday evenin

’ ’
.
Ignatz rowed back with a twenty pound rock tied to the -
stern of his skow b y George H erman who figured that I g ,
needed exercise .
S unday entertainers included seasoned old tr o upers that

had done b ig time on the glucose circuit P 0 Kelly was . . .
topliner with h i s monolog a b out the airship D olly D oten

“
,
”
,
in his trip around the world and across the E nglish channel .
George M c Cl e l l an d war b led his sunshine b aritone solo The “

,
H eart Bowed D own and Tommy A t k y sang S tic k to Y our

”
,
“
Mother ”
The S awdust sextet H erman B l u n c k Buck H o ff
.
, ,
m a n S ausage Malone P omp Flemming E ddie Wulf and

, , , ,
Chris Timm rendered Y e s We Will Gather at the River , .
O ther high class perform e rs that done upstage stu ff were

-
L ew Rouch Free Foch L o u n c e L erch Frank Boyle George

, , , ,
S chmidt Claus Kuehl S teve Costello S imon Y ann D oc

, , , ,
Painter H enry P r o e s t l e r Gus Reimers Red E hlers Jac k

, , , ,
Frost Jud Banker L ew M e u m an n Mick L ee D ic k I b en

, , , , ,
H enry Jaeger B ert G r o s b e c k and Charley Palmer

, , .
B ut them good old days i s gone sport and c am p l i fe , ,
along the o l d river aint nothin b ut an imitation N o w d ay s ’

.
’
they got S creens on the shac k s to keep the flies in in the

daytime and the mosquitoes in in the nighttime an d old ,
rounders aint got nothin special to do b ut ga bb le h ar d l u c k

’
S tories and design phoney a l i b is for hittin the mule ’

.
122
T HE M WA S T HE G O O D OLD DAYS
pranced down Washington avenue givin their corn rah rah ,

’
-
D a v e np o r t v n po r ! Two n i n
D a e t -
e -
e g
i ht !
We a f rom h H wk y
re t e a e e s ta te .
C o rn is Ki n g— h y aoy t e sa
We a re E l k fro m l w y l
s -
o -
a
None of them other v i s i t i n E l k s had a ’
look i n when the j udges cam e to handin out

- ’
prizes as D avenport copped everythin g

, .
In them days S aint L ouis dished up

.
high grade s i x per cent brew and naturall y

-
, , ,
S t r a s s e r s full ban d wa s doin the umta ra r a

’ ’
- -
right in the p ink and they swung a knock ,
out the first crack out of the box .
O nly a few in s id ers knows how them

tooters put it over s o it won t hurt nobo d y s ,
’ ’
f e el i n s to spill the beans now

’
.
Und erstan d sport they was some hi g h , ,
class kidders trottin along with two ninety eight then and
’
- -
, ,
bein as they w a s out to take S aint L ouis all the way to

’
’
the cleaners they had to fix things s o s their full band would
,
play only encore music— g o o d e a s y l i s t e n i n A merican stu ff -

’
.
S ome j ob sport— some big j ob — c o n s i d e r i n

,
’
.
E ver notice when topn o tchers gets out to do their stuff

how they S how o ff and pull earache numb ers ? A nd folks
applaud because they kn o w them squareheads has just s o
m uch late lamented melody to unlimber b efore the y come
-
’
through on second guess with encore music That s what .
gives them artists the idea they re g ood and they get tem ’
,
p e r am e n t al and b alky and they hafta be petted and sugared

, ,
’
or they ll pout and take their little dolly and go home .
Well the D avenport E lks didn t want them musician

,
’
e r s m us s i n
’ ’
up their party by lettin em murder Wagner
’
,
N e i e rb e e r T s c h o t ah o o c h s k i and other d e ad birds s o D olph

, , ,
H e n i gb aum Billy H arrison Charlie Reed Charlie Cameron

, , ,
George Willi s and D an H orne framed W i th the two leadin

’
band guys O le Petersen and H einey S onnta g for some real

, ,
lowdow n dirty work that haint never been equale d in the

'
movies .
125
THE M WA S THE G OOD O LD DAYS
While the other twenty eight m em b ers of S t ra s s e r s -

’
full b and was s e e i n the S ights four cellars underground at

’
L emp s brewery singin H i l e e H ilo an d sayin Prosit

’
,
“ ” ’ “ ” -
’
,
’
and gettin theirselves keyed away up
in G tellin how swe l l the D avenport
,
’
turn er society w as them two m i s s i n ,

’
links raided the music li b rary of that

full band and went south with all the
classics etudes symphonies and over
, , ,
’ ’
tures They didn t leave nothin for the
.
full band to play b ut encores .
Y ou kin lay down a fat b et sport , ,
that they w as h e l a p O p i n next m o r n i n ’ ’
while them twenty eight artistic under g round explorers was

-
’
coolin their hot coppers and m o an i n and lamentin the
’
,
’
l o s i n of their b eloved earache classics

’
.
The tu bb y guy that b lowed in the ringtailed tu b a p ut out

a squawk that w a s he ard clear out to Kerry patch and the ,
cornist wanted to j o i n the Kuklux and drop some b ody o ff

the E ads bridge A ll them musicianers did the best they
.
could to express their f e e l i n s by usin plain U nited S tates

’ ’
,
b ut it couldn t make the grade S o they h ad t a switch to that

’
.
more fl uent heiney lingo that they knew how to handle .
The j ud g es in the b and contest that day w as all E lks ,
u nderst an d and d idn t know B flat from straight up b ut

,
’
,
they k nowed melody from n u t n o i s e A nd bein as S t r as s e r s .

,
’ ’
full band could only play encore stu ff in the contest while ,
other c r a ck bands from a l l over the United S tates tooted

earache selections natural l y there wasn t no t hin to it D av
,
’ ’
.
e mport cleaned the plate .
That wa s a b out the time th at Uncle S am took on the

b enevolent assimilation of t h e Filipinos sport and D aven , ,
port organized Mani l a lodge numb er four eleven forty four ,

- - -
,
at S aint L ouis e l e c t i n Charlie H agemann a s exhausted roos

,
’
ter chief of the tri b e L ee Gra bb e took the part of A guin

, .
a l do chief of the insurgent s and other E lk s ta k in part in

, ,
’
th at Fi l i p ino p ar a d e were C h a rlie S ommers D oc Ro b eson , ,
L e w E c k hardt D ave N ab s t e d t E lmer S mith Charlie Korn

, , , ,
126
T h e Exi le of J ohnn y Ro bb in s .
ON T
’ ’
s pose you newspaper boys ever heard
of Johnny Robbins and h ow he was ban
i s h e d to I reland in the ol d d ays d i d y a ? ,
Well Johnny was a husk y young l a d d y b uc k

,
— t w i n t y wan years of old fo i v e fut tin

“
-
,
-
,
weighin wan h un d e r d and s i v i n t y s i v e n and

’
-
,
a roarin Tip whin I lan d e d in A m e r i k y

’
, ,
b e e g o b ! —and you ve Johnny s own words

” ’ ’
f o r it H e was a harum scat u m with the

.
-
colleens and the poteen over in County Tipperary and when ,
there was an y s k y l ar k i n at fairs and d ances Johnny was in the

’
,
thick of it .H e talked with a rich melodious brogue and , ,
’
believed in ghosts . fairies banshees and the likes 0 that
, , .
The Robbins famil y was of the quality d ye m o i n d and ,

’
, ,
whin Johnn y tuck the s t a i m e r to Quan e s t o wn sure they were ,
that well p l a i s e d they tolt him he d be afther b avin his t w i n t y ’ ’
poun d s in goold S int him aich month whin he settled in

Am er i k y .
So Johnny came to the garden spot of the west with his -

,
love for fun and his taste for poteen L ight hearted the .
-
,
youn g gorsoon made friends quickly at B ro p h y s b o ar d i n ’ ’
h o us eh
a f t e r the news o f the monthly remittance had been
whispered at the supper table .
Now in Tipperary Johnny had never heard of the bird

, ,
known as the j ack roller Neither did he have a suspicion

-
.
that Johnn y could sing like a thrush Those things came as .
’
a surprise after the night of his first visit to Russell s scoop
“ ”
ery when he sang The Boys of Kilkenny to the boys of
,
Bucktown in a c o m e al y e voice that ripple d dolefully through

h i s a d enoids
O t h b o ys Ki l k nny
e y 0 e
We r e l
,
b o wl d O i ris h b a des
y
,
Whi n i v e r th e d m a te
A nny p ri t ty y ou ng m aids,
S ur e y d ki
th e d
'
ss an c a ri s s thi m
r h im
,
'
A d n t a t t so fr e e b
O ho-
l of l l own i a t s n Oi re l a n d
Ki l k nny fo r e m e .
1 29
A fter John ny crooned L arry O G aff and the S han Van ’
”
Vo c h t , M el Trotter and the boys told him he was a fine
young b ucko and that he could sin g like a thrush—John ny
h av i n visited the bank to cash his twenty pound note that
’
-
day Johnny coul d s o b a s easily as he

.
c o uld sing and late tha t ni ght a s his , ,
thought s wandere d to the O ld S od he ,
grew melancholy and keened h i s grief and

lamentation .
“
W u r r a wu r ra mother dar he , ,
so bb ed as the big tears rolled down h i s ,
chee k s “
could ye but s e e yer p o or b y
,
’
J h n n y this avenin with no wan to care

a ,
for him at all at all sure it would bre ak , ,
yer heart O chone ! O chone ! Whin yer .
p o or b y came to A m e r i k y acushla sure he thought the g o old

’
, ,
growed on b ushes But the d i v l l a bit of gool d h as he se e n

.
hide or hair of but the t w i n t y pound note from oul d O i r e l an d ” -

.
Then his head droope d and h i s deep s n o ri n gave signal ,

’
’
that the roarin Tip was all set for the jack roller Johnny -
.
awoke the next m o rn i n with nothin but a bad taste in his ’ ’
mouth but he was happy—for he knew he coul d sin g like a

,
thrush .
Ad m i t t i n s port that Johnny couldn t sing like a real

’ ’
, ,
thru sh he coul d certainl y wail li k e a real banshee H e liked

, .
the j ack roller too for a s quickly as he cashed h i s twenty

-
, ,
pound note each mo n th h e hurrie d to meet t h e boys between ,
’
times doin pick an d shovel duty to pay b o ar d i n expenses
- -
’
.
A nd he grew fond of ridin in the hurry wagon takin a whirl ’

-
,
’
to t h e police stat i on every few weeks for t h r u s h i n or ban ’
s h e e i n in the open air

’
.
O ne day a few fri end s —D an M c Farl an d Joe H ebert , ,
Pete J ac o b s o n Pat Mc c arthy Paul L ag o m ar c i n o Brick

, , ,
M unro and Jimmie Mackay— held a secret session in the

,
’
catacombs to find a way to sand the track for the roarin Tip .
“
Johnny had great respect for the power of a j o o d g e of the
an d as he had so b bed s o patheticall y when he w a s
”
c o o rt
,
pickled they d ecided th at Ireland was the place for that

,
homesick boy .
130
THE M WA S T HE GO OD O LD DAYS
1 32
Th e O l d Tu rne r H a ll Crowd .
In the g o o d old days S port old timers from over the , ,
Rhine would gather at the old Turner hall in the afternoons

to greet youn g John H ill with a genial G o o n d ac h t ! — order
“ ”
a cold stein of brew and a Modoc cigar and qual i fy in a ,
ga b fest while wa i t i n for the four o clock lunch to be served

’ ’
.
A fter the y got through moppin up that lunch the tables ’
’
looked like they d been vi sited by the Kansas grasshoppers ,
and there wasn t enou g h food left to feed a canary

’
.
A fter supper they d come d ro p p i n in one at a time to

’ ’
, ,
pla y pinochle skat or sancho pedro keepin tab on the game

, ,
-
,
’
with a piece of chal k on a cloth boun d S late that ha d a ,

-
sponge tied to it with a red string and they t alked mighty ,
loud c o n s i d e r i n the amount of money they was spendin for

’ ’
’
the good time they was h av i n
If them free lunch ta b les at old Turner hall could talk ,
’
sport they d have s o me awf ul funny stories to tell
,
P roba .
b ly you ve read in story books a b out big banquets where

’
“ ’
the tables groaned with choice viands Well them s the . ,
first tables that ever w as known to groan and they groaned ,
plenty every da y at four o clock when the lun ch houn d s ’

,
l i ned up with their forks an d started spearin dill pickles and ’
b lind robins .
S ome fine days when T r augo t t Richter and Karl Kuehl

,
’
laid a foundation after makin the lunch stations along the
°
’
S e c o n d s t r e e t route they d ,
mosey into ol d Turn er hall ,
all s m i l i n and happy at

’
,
about half past three That

-
.
pair of chow k illers w a s as

-
welcome to the old lunch

gang as them cruel words of S h o l l y the barkeep around , ,
clo sin time The b eer i s a ll !

’
,
“ ”
Their chins would drop and ,
they d look s o downcast and g l o o m y you d think they lost a

’ ’
nickle or s u m p i n .
1 33
Ol d Tur n r
e H a ll .
134
T HEM WA S T HE G OOD O LD DAYS
Du t ch Tr D y
ea t O l d Tu rn r
a s a t e H a ll .
Ord r n
e D ck m h
i g a i S i t
136
T HE M WAS T HE GOO D O LD DAYS
l
p y m o ut h ro c k eggs in their silos before breakfast when they ,
wa s fe e l i n k i n d a d umpy instead of usin D octor P Walter

’ ’
, .
Co nn au gh t o n s little pink liver p ills—one d ollar a box or

’
,
s i x boxes for five .
O n warm s ummer e v e n in s the old Turner hall g an g ’
w o ul d move chairs out on the S idewalk light their long ,
ste mm ed meer s chau m s and park their carpet slippers on ,
the i ron rail t hat the farmers usta t i e their hosses to Then .
the y d bra g about the g oo d ol d times they ha d over in the

’
Fatherland and they d order their evenin stein while the y

,
’ ’
listened t o the work of the m ae nn e rc h o r liederkranz an d , ,
ge san gvere i n r eh e ar s i n upstairs in the d in in room for the ’ ’

-
bi g d o i n s of the s y lvester harmonie an d turner maskenball

’
, ,
that w as to b e pulled o ff the next w inter .
I t w as d ut c h t r e at for all hands and the cook sport N o , .
’
callin S h o l l y to s e t em up to the house and see what the
’
b oys in the backroom would have nor no p ut t i n on parties ,

’
.
E ach old stager du g up his leather sack un tie d the shoe ,
string an d carefully and solemnly handed over his nickel

, .
N obody hurried N 0 chance for katzenj ammer They woul d

. .
just shake the stein around occasionally to freshen it up ,

'
and then s i p slowly to make it las t all evenin W hen ailin .

’
.
’
“ ” “ ”
or fe e l in not s o goot they ordered a l e e d l e s c h n aa p s
’
,
from S h o l l y and then hurried home to mamma and hit

, ,
the ha y early I n the m o rn i n they crawled out fe e l i n fit

.
’ ’
a s a fiddle S ome control sport but not much S peed

.
, , .
The second generation put the indian S ign on the d utch

treat labeled the d i c k sm i t h e r a tightwad and hot coppers
, ,
-
“
came into fashion When youn g fellers got f e e l i n not s o
.
’
“ ”
goot they ordered a l e e d l e s c h n a ap s from S h o l l y
, T h ey .
li k ed the kick that the s c h n aa p s carried and they took a few ,
’
more j olts right in the same old spot and then the singin ,
b u g g o t busy A s old Turner hall doused the glims at ten

.
o clock they then crossed the street to Fritz Qu i c k e n s t e d t s

’
,
’
“
Unter den L inden or moseyed up to H err Priester s D ie
”
,
“ ’
Kapelle to S how a little class with S wiss w arb l i n That s ’

.
’
how the m o r n i n after the night b efore was introduced west

’
of H arr i son street over the Great D ivide S ome speed sport
,
.
, ,
b ut not much control .
137
Ol d P e te .
P e te r Ja co b n se .
Y ou n P
g et e .
1 38
Folks that cele b rated b o c k b e e r day didn t

’
his front paws .
have any doubt about alc o holic c ontent in that b everage on

the m o r n i n after B o c k b e e r l oo k ed just like
’
.
molasses tasted l i k e b rew b ut had lotsa TNT , ,
and white mule concealed a b out its person .
When you came to and opened your peepers ,
the next m o r n i n that s m i l i n b illy goat w a s ’
,
’
-
right there and he cracked you between the ,

'
eyes with a mallet that weighed a cou pla tons ,
and said N ow w i l l y a b e good !

“ ”
,
Terrence O B r i e n the flagman on west ’
Fifth street was S hort and squatty an d had , ,
a habit of talkin to hisself and the heine y ’

,
k ids from Warren street school usta holler and tell him to
I n d ad e an I ll nat S hut up
“ ’ ’
shut up . Ter ,
rence woul d reply a n d i v i l the d o o t c h m an

“
,
’
o f me inches kin ma k e me shut up !

”
George O tt was kingpin n o i s e m e i s t e r

of th e old Turner hall crowd and he presided ,
at the honorary car d table with the old

“ ”
,
S c h m i d t t ri o—E H u go S chmidt P rofessor

. ,
N i e d e r s c h m i d t and E ditor D r e c k s c h m i d t of
j
the Staatz Zeitun g as his helpers

'
-
When that quartet got . .
w ai zm e d up right in a pinochle ga m e old George would get

, ,
ex cite d and whack the table an awful wa 110 p h o l l e r i n ,

’
“
S c h o e p p e wie haus ! meanin S pade high as bi g as a
“ ’
house ”
. O ne time when little red headed Professor de P o li -
tur from S aint L ouis was p o l i s h i n the bac k bar the old lion
,
,
,
’
,
roar ed s o l oud that the professor dropped o ff the ladder

, ,
s p il l in
’
a quart of his high priced po lish It required the -
.
help of E mil Geisler H enry Kohrs L ipman O chs Rudolph , , ,
L ange and a coupla j olts of ku e mmel to iron out the p r o

,
’
fe s s o r s trouble The only time that George O tt failed to
.
show up at the Turner ha l l w as when he put in a week at

the hospital h av i n h i s knuc k les repaired aften an e x c i t i n
’
,
’
game of pinochle .
Tailor Krambec k b esides b ein alderman of the First ,

’
war d and an all round comical guy walked with a limp his
-
’
, ,
right wheel sorta g o o s e t e p p i n H e was called Ruthen Bur

“ ” ’
.
141
Tra u go tt c
Ri h t e r .
c ol
Ni h as Fe j e r v a r y .
”
dat ! the poor little gal got all fl u s t e r e d and blushed like a ,
ripe cherry Then S he turned to her cousin and ast him if

.
Milt came fr o m Germany and when H einey told her that he ,
did s h e wanted to know what ma de him so blac k

,
.
M ilt b ein quite a k idder in them days ta lk ed to H ilda

’
,
in low g ei man sayin

-
“
A fter you have lived in D avenport
,
’
as long as I have you ll b e j ust a s black as I am ” ’

The .
poor little gal got awfully scared and S he wanted her cousin ,
to send her b ack to Germ any right away .
The next day H ilda and H einey took a freight train for
D urant where the little emigrant g al learned h o wt a milk
,
cows weed onions and plow corn When they visi ted D av
, , .
_
e n p o r t a few years later to attend the b ird s hootin exercises

’
-
,
of the turners on Mayday they called on Milt and H ilda had , ,
a goo d laugh when the c u l l u d boy again greeted her sa v in ,

’
VVi e g e i h t di dat !
“ ”
The biggest event in the history of old Turner hall wa s

“
the grand masquerade of the Turners General Grant s Trip ,
’
A round the World The Turner boys c i rc u s e d that S how .
to the limit and lotsa people thought that old U S h i s

,
”
. .
self was really comin to town Gustav D onald h av i n the

’
.
,
’
build of the general mad e up for the part with the b ig black, ,
cigar in the corner of his mouth and he was a knockout ,

.
The committees marched to the Rock Island station at eight

o clock to meet the General Grant S p ec ial to tender that
’ “ ”
,
old war hoss the freedom of the city The general was
-
.
accompanied by H err Foolscap special reporter of the N ew ,
Y ork Times personated b y H einrich S chober an actor of

, ,
the theatre stock company They had all k i n d s a fireworks .
and r e d fir e while paradin the streets and both halls were ’

,
pac k ed that night the costum es b ein the finest ever seen in
,
’
the burg .
A mo ng the popular pastimes of that period sport was , ,
b e at i n the gate at old Turner hall

’
Y oung fellers worked .
at c o u n t e r fe i t i n ri b bons and tic k ets for dances and masquer

’
ades They would t ry to crowd the door between dances

.
when the rush to the b ar was on crawl through upstairs ,
windows sneak through the theatre or clim b the highboard

, ,
fence in the rear S ome workers b avin a stock of c a l m e d

. ,
’ -
1 44
card b oard and ri bb ons would buy a tic k et to get a return

,
chec k then cross the s t reet to the w i n e r o o m at O tto Volk

,
land s ma k e up phoney tic k ets and se l l em for a quarter or

’
, ,
’
half dollar .
O ne cold winter night when the Thalia society gave a ,
b ig masquerade a dozen tic k et wor k ers c l imb ed the high

,
board fence i n the rear and were j ust a b out to pry open a ,
window in the little hall when Charlie Kindt turned the fi re

ho se on em givin em an awf ul s o a k i n
’
,
’ ’
They S howed speed ’
.
gettin b ac k over the fence and they h a d t a linger a coupla

’
,
hours around the b ig cannon h e at i n stove in the Farmer s ’ ’
’
hotel til their clothes dried s o s they could go home
’
.
M e bb e you young fellers thin k you got some b ig men

s t ep p in around in the old town n o w d ay s sport b ut the
’ ’
, ,
o l d Turner hall gang had a man that

w as b igger than Fatty Rai b le Carl ,
Thode and George S chic k all rolled ,
together .
Never heard of S h o l l y S chwert

feger d i d y a ? Well S h o l l y gave the , ,
h ay s c al e s a wallop they haint for g ot

to this day H e w as s i x feet four up .
- -
,
and d own acro s s around and b e , , ,
tween When S h o l l y stepped out for .
a walk fol k s u sta ast what was all the

excitement and where was all the b ig
crowd goin W hen he d get measured for a suit it meant
’
.
’
overtime at the woolen mills S h o l l y was the slic k est pen .
artist that ever lived in D avenport and he co uld draw birds , ,
lions and fancy letters that looked like steel e n g r a v i n s H e

,
’
.
had a smile that reached from Renwick s pier to Cook s ’ ’
point and when he moseyed around on cloudy days folks

,
thou g ht the s un had come out .
There wasn t no wireless then S port but them Turner

’
, ,
hall boys had a system all worked out that beat wireless
forty ways when the Rogertown and Goo setown roughnecks
tri ed to break in on their dancin parties When v i s i t i n ’
.
’
stews started rough stu ff some member of the com mittee ,
would holler Raus mit ihm ! and that messa g e ci rc ulate d

“ ”
1 45
quicker th an wireless There was a close i n footb all rush

. -
,
and when the roughhouser pulled himself together in the

mi ddle of the street there
’
wasn t nobody in sight ,
but after the birdies quit

’
singin and he dusted o ff
h i s clothes he co uld hear ,
the orchestra p l ay i n the ’
strains of the good ol d

Tyrolean waltz .
If a guy hailed you in

them day s and slapped you
on the back and called you
“
b rother you d think he
”
,
’
he was cuckoo or sumpiu ,
’
and you d hike up to the
police station and report
to Fr ank Kessler or H enry ,
H ass or Charlie Faulkner

, ,
that there was a loose nut

down the line that needed
t i gh t e n i n
’
But when one .
nails you in these times

you give the com b ination on your pants pocket a quick turn ,
’
and you wonder if you re up against a panhandler or only a
lodge mem b er with the grip and password that s pickin o ff ’ ’
easy o ne s for practice

.
’
Times is surely changin sport and unless a guy drives
, ,
slow and watches his step he s liable to get bumpe d into

’
, .
1 46
THE M WA S T HE GO OD OLD DAYS
instrument . A wagonload of harness b ulls b ac k ed up fifteen

minutes later to as t A dam how come but the D e gr af boy ,
had done gone and flew the coop Chief Kessler met Pri n ce .
A l b ert the next day and told him he wanted A dam and ,
a s t when he would return

“
A h dunno jus exactly how soon
.
’
Mistah K e s s l e h Alb ert replied b ut it pears to me that if

”
,
“
,
’
A dam shows as much spe ed comin a s he did goin that boy s ’ ’
,
’
T hat story of P rince A lber t s

”
a long time o v e h d u e now .
’
has made the rounds in the papers regularly S ince then and ,
is used b y vaudevi l le hams now when the h o o c h y k o o ch y -
gag fails to get over .
John H anover W arwick and hi s four sons— L oc k e ,
G aw g e B o b and Idell — operated a b ar b er s h 0 p on Third

, ,
street near P erry where b usiness men dropped in to enj oy

,
the quaint philosophy of the former s l ave John H anover s .

’
oldest b oy L oc k e wa s not k een for the razor b ein handier

, , ,
’
with the b anj o and one day he hopped an east b ound freight
,
-
for Chicago . L oc k e returned a few years later b illed on ,
the posters as star end man of the famous Georgia minstrels

-
.
When he stepped along in the street parade all the c ul l u d

gals and b oys l ined the streets to greet L ocke and P ap W ar ,
w ick was the proudest man i n town When L oc k e sang .
“
These Bones S ha l l Rise A gain at the Burtis the c ul l u d , ,
’
folks nearly raised the roof There wasn t a coon in nigger .
heaven that evenin sport— they were b oldin down reser v ed

’
,
’
seats to S how L oc k e they were strong for him .
We had our George Wash i ngton in them times too , .
George done w h i t e w as h in and c al c i m i n i n and w a s the first

’ ’
,
c u l l u d b rother to m a rry a white gal George lived out near .
Ninth and H arrison and hung out his S ign readin

,
’
George Washington General ,
W h i te wa h i n
s g.
O n S unday afternoons he dolled up with p l u g h at and

linen duster M r s George w e ar i n her b ig flowered hat and
, .
’
,
when they paraded the streets they set a hot pace for c ul l ud
society .
Charlie Gi fford with his big white hat and happy smile
, ,
was a f am iliar figure A lthough Charlie never heard anything

.
“ ”
about mammy songs he spilled a nasty tenor could roll
, ,
1 48
the bones and call for little Jo with A lonzo Twi ggs Mose
, , ,
P atton B il l y M essenger or any of the young sports that

, ,
inhaled bean soup at Mistah H il l s quick lunch counter ’

.
When Charlie B uc k came to town with a minstrel show ,
he made a hit in the street parade j u ggl i n the drumsticks ’
in the air while he played the s nare dr um Charlie was s o .
wel l pleased with h i s c u l l u d admirers that he counted the

ties back to this burg as soon a s the show went b ro k e .
A splendid old landmar k of the c ul l ud fraternity was

Milton H oward who wor k ed many years for Uncle S am at
,
the A rsenal and later retired on a pension Uncle M ilt w as .
a gifted linguist h av i n mastered several languages and with

,
’
his stories fr o m slavery days to the present time he could

always in t erest a crowd .
H enry M c Gaw lived on F i fth street where the Rock ,
Island station now stands H enry introduced night janitor

.
service for leadin doctors and lawyers and his two boys
’
, ,
S cott and E d were well known around town

, .
A leck Ro b erts was one of the best known boys in c ul l ud

circles and in the old days when the Kimball house was the
,
bi g spo t around here A leck done the train ballyhoo act at

,
the Rock Island station and later at the big hotels , His .
foghorn voice was fami l iar to all com m ercial travelers .
Then there was that happy trio—Jake Busey and h i s

brothers Tom and J erry Jake w a s educated by J W S tew
,
. . .
art the attorney b ein the first c ul l u d b oy to graduate in

, ,
’
the pub lic schools and Ja k e was showered with flowers b y

,
h i s white admirers Ja k e had a style of his o wn in j u g gl i n

.
’
hard word s that made the c ul l u d folks

gasp Jake loved Tom and Jerry b oth
.
,
b rotherly and liquid and when the three ,
boys met it w a s one grand reunio n and ,
they felt so happy that they laughed all

the time The B usey boys were i n great .
demand b ecause of their p l e as i n manners ’

,
and at every encampment of Company B ,
Jake was chief cook with Tom an d Je rry ,
for assistants Them boys had S plendid .
voices and although they had never heard

,
1 49
Memphis Blues D oc Worley taught em to sing the p o p u

,
’
’
lar songs of the day Couldn t make the Busey boys mad .
’ ’ ’
by callin em c oo ns No s ah ! They d j ust laugh at you . , .
They made a great hit singin Coon ! Coon ! C oon ! when

“ ” ’
out with the serenaders the chorus r u n n i n like this : ,

’
Coon ! Coo n ! Coon !

A h wi h m colo b
s a would f d a e .
C oo n ! Coo n ! Coo n !
i ch du ky h
'
lt s s a s s d
a e .
Coo n ! Coo n ! Coon !

M h io ni gh d
n n
'
, t an noon
A h wi h A h w wh i h i l of
'
s as a te C e s tid a
Coon ! Coon ! Coo n !

At the finish Tom would roll the whites of h i s eyes at
Jake an d rumble the low bass notes Jerry wo uld loo k solemn
, ,
w hile c arr y i n the air and Jake would soar up on a high

’
,
falsetto note to the quivery finale .
S quire B urns of East D avenport was another celebrat e d

, ,
character The squire s p ent forty y ears in slavery an d he

.
,
could entertain with stories of plantation days and the cotton

fields With his gray hoss and rickety wa g on the squire
.
,
di d the light h au l i n in the east end of town and he w as a ’

,
great favorite with the youn g sters and old timers whenever
“
he drove down Mound street .
S ilas H opkins natural mimic and imitator lived on , ,
Christy street in E ast D avenport S ilas wa s a gifte d v e n t ri l .
o qu i s t , and with his bird and animal imitations could enter

tain folks by the hour H i s s k etch about the c ul l u d parson
.
v i s it in
’
a hen roost and his conversa tion with the feathered
-
,
brothers i n v i t i n them to travel the true road to salvation

,
’
,
ha s never been equaled by a professional .
L otsa home folks has got the idea sport that hen roost , ,
-
p r o w l i n i s
’
a specialized trade for c u l l u d artists only N ot .
knockin nobody s me al ticket understand but in the ol d

’ ’
, ,
d ays we had a white poultry fri sker named Charlie Forrest

who could vamp more b roilers with his gunnysack with less ,
c ac k l i n
’
and fu s s i n than an y of his c ul l u d rivals
’
, H is skill .
earned for him t h e title of Chic k en Charlie and the right to

“ ”
,
have h i s name em b lazoned in the temple of fame of our S cott

county heroes .
150
T HE M WA S T HE GOO D OLD DAYS
Memphis Blues D oc W orley taught em to sin g the p O p u

,
’
’
lar songs of the day Couldn t make the Busey boys mad .
’
by callin em coo ns N o s ah ! They d j ust laugh at you
’ ’
.
, .
They made a great hit singin Coon ! Coon ! C oon ! when

“ ” ’
out with the serenaders the chorus r un n i n like this : ,

’
Coon ! Coon ! Coo n !

A h wi h m colo b
s a woul d f d a e .
Coo n ! Coon ! C oon !

i ch du k y h
'
It s s a s s d
a e .
Coo n ! Coon ! Coo n !

M h io n i gh d
n n
'
, t an noo n
A h wi h A h w wh i ch i l of
'
s as a te e st id a
C o on ! Coon ! Coon !
At the finish Tom would roll the whites of h i s eyes at
Jake an d rumble the low bass notes Jerry wo uld look solemn
, ,
while c ar ry i n the air and Jake would soar up on a high

’
,
falsetto note to the quivery finale .
S quire Burns of Ea st D avenport w as another celebrated

, ,
character The squire s p ent forty y ears in slavery an d he

.
,
could entertain with stories of plantation days and the cotton

fi elds With his gray hoss and rickety wagon the squire
. ,
di d the light h au l i n in the east end of town and he w as a ’

,
great favorite with t h e youn g sters an d old timers whenever

he drove down Mound street .
S ilas H opkins natural m i mic and imitator lived on , ,
Christy street in E ast D avenport S ilas was a gifted v e n t ri l .
o qu i s t , and with his b ird and animal imitations could enter

tain folks by the hour H i s s k etch about the c ul l u d par son .
v i s it in a hen roo st and his conversa tion with the feathered

’
-
,
brothers i n v i t i n them to travel the true road to salvation

,
’
,
h as never been equale d by a professional .
L otsa home fol k s has got the idea sport that hen roost , ,
-
p r o w l i n i s
’
a specialized trade for c u l l u d artists only N ot .
kn ockin nobody s meal ticket understand but in the ol d

’ ’
, ,
d ays we had a white poultry fri sker named C harlie Forrest

who co uld vamp mor e broilers with his gunnysack with less ,
c ac k l i n
’ ’
and f u s s i n than an y of his c ul l ud rivals, H is skill .
earned for h i m the title of Chic k en Charlie an d the ri g ht to

“ ”
,
have h i s name emblazoned in the temple of fame of our S cott

county heroes .
1 50
THE M WA S T HE GOO D O LD DAYS
Whenever a roost was prowle d clean not even a ta i l ,
feather bein left the fly bobs knew that the gran d old master
’
,
-
wa s on the j ob and after the b e rt i l l i o n expert ex a mine d

,
C harlie s teeth the chicken charmer wa s rewarde d with thirt y

’
days board at H arvey L eonard s hotel

’ ’
.
It was a gift with Ch arlie comin as natural to him as

,
’
r as s l i n
’
to Farme r Burns k id n ap p i n to Pat C rowe s c o u t i n
,
’
,
’
to Bu ff alo Bill or a s special talent comes to an y of the grand

,
old heroes of S cott county .
U s old stagers may not stick around lon g enough to s e e

it S po rt but in y ears to come Chicken Charlie will roll into
, ,
h i s o wn when s o m e public spirited g u y will backfire h i s

,
-
bundle and erect a monument i n L e c laire park to comm e m

orate the wonde r ful achievemen ts of our c h amp c hi cke n
ch armer .
151
T king
a a J ol t at C h rli G ll gh r
a e a a e
'
s.
f r
A te a ga m e k r dc
of po e i e.
152
H appy D ays and a lot of other heavy hitters in the o l d

,
booze league It was good home cooked chow too

.
-
, .
D r i n k i n w as more or less a fine art

’
’
in them days Now it s a wildman s .
’
game with the wild wimmen— p u t t i n on ’
a party with the fliv and the j azz A nd a

lota g uys is hittin up hooch n ow that ’
never thought of g u z z l i n b efore because ’

,
they think the stu ff s hard to get— an d ’ ‘
they want to S ho w up this Volstead guy .
Why away back in the real old days , ,
of Johnny M c G u i n n e S S D oc Mitchell Joe , ,
Parri s h S am Tann e r Phi lip S c h l aap

, ,
l
,
B illy May Johnny S mith Pat Tuohy Joe , , ,
C ope Fritz Qu i c k e n s t e d t H onts Moore and E d H ood . any

, , ,
lame bird wa s treated like a human an d he coul d toast his ,
S hins up agin the ol d stove an d keep s t i c k i n around til ,

’ ’
some lonesome p arty lookin for somebody to listen to h i s

,
’
troubles would blow in an d ast him would he have s o m e t h i n

‘
to take .
Talk about bein sociable ! I t was always fair weather

’
at the Bucket of Blood the D ouble E lbow

“ ” ” “
,Zum E ck ,
S tein and the Blue Goose

,
” “
.
There wasn t none of them sn eak y

’
’
stickup guys m o o c h i n around in the da rk

’
’
l oo kin to s ap a live one for the price of
a ho oc h N one of this misera b le g izz ard
.
g r i n d i n
’
moonshine was b ein dished out ’
in the homes neither The wimmen folks .
was p l ay i n t h e gv as h b o ar d s and tendin to

’ ’
’
their k n i t t i n and not l e ar n i n to b e dis
,
’
tillers .
S ay— if every dame in this burg

that s o p e r at i n a home hooch factory was
’ ’
-
sent up they d have to put S ideboards on the big house out

’
,
at A namosa That; prattle about humans gettin good with

.
’
the blowo ff of old J oh n Barleycorn was hoke for the marines , .
’
Folks didn t seem to get it nohow ,
.
1 55
THE M WA S THE G OOD O LD DAYS
And y Gl n n
e .
H a pp y D a y s .
Ji m m y D ool y
e .
156
Why when the big brewery guys H e n ry Frahm Georg e

,
, ,
Mengel O scar Koehler Charlie and E rnst Zoller and Bore

, , ,
Koester made the rounds they could s e t em up to the

, ,
’
house for a fiv e case note -

.
A nd now what do you g et for a fiv e caser ? Y ou meet -
some S l i m e y bootleg g er in a dark doorway and S lip him a

fiv e spo t for a pint of white mule that would make a ra b bit
-
spit at a lion Then you take a shot in the arm and get
.
g o gg le eye d and figh t i n mad A nd then you have the willies

-
’
.
’“
and come near c r o ak i n and while you re m o an i n N ever
,
’ ’
again ! you re o fl a prohi b ition

” '
’
.
Take these hopheads that are up against the snow for ,
instanc e Why them b irds b ein mostly nuts is s o ne rvous

. ,
’
the y can t rea d nor work nor do nothin to ease the bu gs

’
, ,
’
that i s bitin inside their noodles That s where this strong

’
.
’
arm s t uff comes in and the fly d i c k s k nows it When them

, .
there nobody home guys gets illumi n ated -
with the snow and hittin on all s i x cyl ,

’
inders they get f e e l i n generous and want

,
’
’
to declare in on the other guy s stuff j ust ,
li k e re g lar socialists S o they shove a ’

.
cannon under the nose of the first po o r

b lob they meet or else stick up a one man ,
-
car motorman on some lonesome street .
Whenever you g et hep that a doctor s ’
j oint has been prowled for the hop Bob , ,
nail down your win d ows and get ready to

stick up your ha nds on first call .
G o o d old brew never acted that way .
Course it h a d some pep and action to it

, It would .
make a g uy feel like singin “

S weet Rosey O G r ad y and
” ’ ’
“
S he May H ave S een Better D ays an d help him to pull
”
,
a few of them barbershop chords and do some close harmony -
stu ff wi th his hoofs restin on the old b rass footrail

, But ’
.
no guy never wanted to climb a telegraph pole nor murder

his poor old grandmother after ta k in on a cargo No S ir ! ’
.
,
A fter you got through S ingin you was all peaceab le and ’
ready to hit the hay .
1 59
A nd
you didn t need no s m i l i n coacher to clap his h ands
’ ’
and say “
Come on fellers—get action on S mi l e — S mile
, ,
‘
S mile and when you come to them words S mile don t

,
’
,
‘
,
’ ’
speak em b ut just smile

’ ”
, .
H onest i t s awf ul to thin k of what ,

’
’
one of them sissy birds would have comin
to him with the old gang lined u p and
primed .
But you couldn t help S ingin when ’ ’
you had real b rew under your b elt and ,
you imag i ned you w as fine and dandy ,

.
Why in them days a guy had to go , ,
to a masquerade or play S econd street on

a windy day to get an eyeful Now loo k .
at em ! A l l the novelty h a s b l o o i e d
’
.
In them days too when a guy got canned at t h Ar , ,
sena l or had h i s head chopped o ff at the City H all for doin

,
’
too much work he could open a saloon and invite h i s friends

,
and relations to drop in and S hake the dice and blow their
j ac k in h i s j oint j ust to help him get rich H e d s ay Come
,
“
.
’
on boys ! Ta k e s u m p i n on the house

,
”
.
H e had a fift y fift y setup for the big come b ack if he d

-
’
lay o ff the b ooze .
Now what happens ?

Why when a guy hits the rocks and loses out on hi s
,
j o b the only stu ff he thin k s he can pull is

,
to peddle in surance and real estate or ,
wor k the stock sellin graft and he makes -

’
life miserable for all h i s friend s and rela

tions and h i s wife s friend s and relation s
,
’
’
in t r y i n to blackj ack em into fallin for
’ ’
the bunk he i s t ry i n to put over ’

.
There s two ol d ti m e days in the year

’
-
that everybody would like to s e e come

back j ust onc e—them s Christma s and ’
N ew Y ear s—with the good old tom and j erry the e ggn o gg
’
- -
, ,
the h o t s c o t c h the rum punch the bubbles and al l of them

, , ,
other swell drinks and the b i g free lun ch , .
1 60
H o t e l D a v e npor t Pi e -
S ha p e d Ba r
Cu t t o l eg al d anc rom churc r o r y c y counc l ch n n n

ist e f h p pe t th e it i a gi g ame of
Pr l all y rary r rov d r n r anc

,
e t ze e to L i b s t e et to p i e st ee t e t e.
1 62
Bo bb ing th e T ai l o f D e m on Ru m .
When the j oy killer whetted -
his skiv and hit the trail of Demon

3
l! (
Rum in the old days S port he to o k
him on the installment plan lop
, ,
p n o ff h i s tail by inche s to m ake

’
i ,
the operation les s painful The .
old monster wo ul d b e called on the

carpet every s o often t o stan d for ,
the goat degree and a s t to spot ,
hi s tail on the choppin bl ock to ’

,
g ive the N e al S the L un g ers an d , ,
other money haters a whack at it -

,
on a percentage basis .
O f course nobody ever hear d ,
an ol d round er call for a S lug of rum to wet h i s whistl e ,
but the guys that s t ry i n to p opularize th e stuff that flo ws

’ ’
under the brid g e always S peak a b out D emon R u m .
W hen told to cut the wi n e r o o m and d ouse the glim at

o n e o cl oc k i n the m o rn i n
’
D emon Rum threw an awful roar
’
, .
H e lost the tip of h i s tai l H e b e l l e r e d on twelve o cloc k .

’
’
clos i n too , Another link was whacke d o ff
. The o r d er .
cam e to pull down the blinds at eleven o clock D em o n Rum ’

.
w a s gettin d esperate and declared nothin doin H e tri e d

’ ’ ’
.
,
to k i d hisself by hirin a fl o c k a lawyers to back him up

’
.
H e lost another rattler Every time t hat tail sho we d S i gn s

.
of h e al i n the j oy killer s wi shed the skiv an d D emon Rum

’
-
,
holler e d O uch ! ”
O ne c old blo od ed dry proposition s e e i n that old D emon

-
,
’
Rum w as on the run won out with an argument that t wo

,
hun d red life savin stations w as too many for this burg The
-
’
.
cards was shu ffl ed again and fifty wa s invited to walk t h e ,
pl an k e v ery S i x mont hs That deal put the old m o nster o n

.
h i s goo d behavior Go o d sal o on guys began tipp i n 0 5 ’

.
othe r s aloon guys not s o good .
1 63
THEM WA S THE GOOD OLD DAYS
The tail of D emon R u m w a s w i g gl i n k inda weak when ’
the order was posted to bl ow the whistle at ten The skiv .
dropped and another b utton clic k ed o ff n the choppin b loc k

,
’ ’
.
Fifty good guys and true with clerks and he l p er s was , ,
d umped on the mar k et fo r pic k et duty coroner j u ry serv ,

-
ice o r other light occupations

, .
W hen nine o cloc k closin was posted the tail of D emon

’ ’
Rum wa s b obbed clean as a pe t bull p u r p s and it had as ’

,
much wi ggle as the s t e e r i n gear of a salt mackerel ’

-
.
When the law b arrin saloons within a hundred yards of ’
schools churches and pu bl ic institutions was put over , it

, ,
looked li k e curtains for three popular moisture resorts within

the limit of the c u l l ud church near Fourth and Gaines But .
some wise cracker S howed the light to the intelligent b oard of

-
deacons of the church In order not to b uck personal li b erty

.
,
t h e c ul l u d brethren gave the three popul ar moisture resorts a

S hort lea se on life b y movin the church up on the hill ’
.
Parson N ed L ee s mission in the heart of Bucktown ’
, ,
d an g led the skiv over a dozen b o o ze havens d e c o r at i n that -

’
’ ’
sporty secti on The par s on allowed he wasn t r u n n i n a
.
church nohow none of his clients b ein hooked up with that

,
’
line of endeavor But to play safe b efore knocko ff day came

.
-
around the mission was moved across the Great D ivide to

,
put a school o ff watch and planted down near the par k where ,
it couldn t squirt e m b al m i n fluid into any pleasure palaces

’ ’
along the Bucktown right o f way - -

.
The H otel D avenport b ar brought out a peppy argument .
S ome guys wanted the distance from the church property !
’
measured on an angle to save the brass rail for t rav e l i n ,
-
men . O ther guys wanted the distance measured as the “
crow flies ” “
.
”
The as t h e crow fl i e s g uys w o n The b ar
- - -
.
was moved to the storero o m on the Pretzel alley side of the

hote l and everything w a s lovely— until some snooper started
,
t h u m b i n the b ig law book That great wor k had it d o ped

’
.
t h at bars h a d t a have a street entrance not s p i l l i n nothin ,

’ ’
a b out an alley entrance The city council pronto called .

, ,
a special m e e t i n and P retzel alley lost i t s good name bein

’
, ,
’
changed to L i b rary street so s a guy could ma k e the bar ,

’
without d u c k i n up an alley A fter t h e j oy killers cra bb ers

’
.
-
, ,
1 64
T HEM WA S T HE G O O D OLD DAYS
Ven s o m e d i m e I s e e you not gome ar r r o u n d t yet - -

,
“ ”
Ros ey rep lied I v i ll s c h m i l e all the t ime al r e t t y
,
.
O ld T om S miley thought Ro s ey s comeback s o clever ’
that he h aw h aw e d and s e t em up to every body i n c l ud i n T o m

’
,
’
Glenn the porter and a m o o c h i n smoke from over in Goo s e

, ,
’
holl o w .
Rosey wa s proud of his summ er garden wi t h i t s s aw -
dust covere d floor where he served lunch and c elebrate d

-
,
b irthdays and holidays out under the colored j ap lanterns -

.
’
Crowds gathered at these parties to listen to R o s e y s sp e eches ,
th ey bein gems of pigeon english always S p ark l i n an d

’
-
,
’
original Rosey would urge customers with b i g growlers

.
,
that they wanted filled for a nic k el to visit S i H all E d Jen , ,
ne y J o hn Conklin E mil B eyer P ete Foley Julius Goetsch

, , , , ,
Mike H eeney M c M a n u s s B ar t e m e i e r s A s c h e r m an n s P il
,
’
,
’
,
’
,
l ion s S haughn essy s or o t her places that m ade a sp e cialt y of

’ ’
,
work i n for the brewery

’
.
1 66
H oo king S uck e r s in L it t le M on t e C ar lo .
NY
TI M E a guy wanted quick actio n for h i s
coin in the old days sport he could get it , ,
g ood and plenty in this burg There was .
a lota live g ams r o o s t i n alon g East Third ’
street ready to take suckers with poker faro

, , ,
roulette craps open and S hut the shells o r

, ,
- -
, ,
the old a wn y game The trim shops played .

-
the game wide open without curtains and , ,
old western minin ca m p s in their palmiest ’
’
days didn t have better too ls for friskin the ’
boo b with the roll wh o tri ed to outsm art the

slicker at his own game .
S peedy youn g bloo d s and fo xy old

ti mers came from miles around to take a
’
chance b avin heard the bunk about Zeke Murdock makin
,
’
a big killin at S mokey Reese s or a pipedream about some

’ ’
p i k i
’
n stool pig eo-
n b ustin the b ank at L ew Marten
’
s But ’
.
it w as al way s the old old story— the sucker loses and the
“
,
gambler wins — ”
at every tu r n of the W heel Clerks factory . ,
workers molders mechanics busin ess men t rav e l i n men

, , , ,
’
,
gu ys with an d without brains woul d S peed to the gam Shops ,

-
to make a killin and many a week s payroll w as S hot for a

’
,
’
big win that never connected .
S easoned old racetrack workers book ,
makers railbirds an d touts floc ked to our

, ,
little Monte Carlo to play bank between ,
hoss racin seasons j ust to pass the time

-
’
,
awa y .
The gams o p e r at i n th e m joints w as ’
a s swell a bunch as ever turned a trick
the easy come easy go boys They tog

-
,
-
.
g ed in the latest spo rted big S parklers

, ,
and when they couldn t g et chicke n they ’

5 m “?
took the feath e rs an d sto o d the ga ff like d e a d game s p ort s

/
-
, .
1 67
T HE M WA S T HE G OOD O LD DAYS
They admitted they were business men sport— s p e c u ,
lators— and while they were t r i m m i n marks and pushovers

,
’
,
,
they h a d t a stand for many a S ha k edo wn— from the regular

t a k eo ff to the blow b ac k to squealers that sho t their coin on
b ooze and told their wives

they lost it in card d u mps -
.
It w a s con for con— take or

get took .
A mong the high fly e r s -
of the old guard were Monte

M c Cal l H ugh ie C o rr igan , ,
Kid Warner O S Reynolds , ,
Bo b Clark S am S tuc k ey , ,
Ike Gray Billy Maddox , ,
Bert S mith Charlie Gordon , ,
M ike Gowan Walter Nolan , ,
Bill Bryan C ully Flannigan , ,
Jack M c L ar k i n Tom D avis , ,
Chu b Finnegan O le Marsh Frank B ecker A ndy B i l l b e rg

, , , ,
J akie S chaum Fred Titus Frank S cott and other good

, , ,
lookin g ents besides a regiment of tin horns c o m e o n s

’
,
-
, ,
dealers stools steerers loo k outs pork and b e an ers and

, , , ,
- -
,
cheap pikers that did the c ap p i n to keep the old machine ’ '
greased .
The Chappie br others worked the shells at the country

fairs and they were s o clumsy that any
,
rube could pick the shell that covered the

little pea unless he happened to put down
,
a piece of longgreen on h i s guess .
It took lotsa good coin to keep them

there gamblin j oints movin b ut the sucker
’ ’
,
market was choked with talent lookin for ’
ten to one S hots—with the same easy

- -
p ickin s it now has for oil S harks and other

’
-
grifters .
There was all k i n d s a poker fiends

run n i n loose too takin a chance on b l o wi n their wages at
’
, ,
’ ’
the green ta b le with the cute little S l o t h o l e in the center ,
1 68
fake r a s s l i n j ob the workers too k Jack down to Misso uri or

’
,
A rkansa s for action H e b ein kinda particular they let h i m

.
’
have h i s own way in everythin g even to namin the stake ,

’
holder and referee and to S how him that real coin was put
,
up they let him feel the bundle Th at feel ma de h i s mouth

.
water and he s wo l l y ed the bait— hook line an d sin k er

, , , .
It took S i x months of careful work to
faked a b usted b lood vessel and a

ras s l e r -
hemorrhage by bitin a blad d er of red

,
’
ink— Jack made his quick getaway with

’ ’
the other trimmers s o s he wouldn t get ,
pinched for b ein in on the murder of the ’
ras s l e r A nd when he co uldn t fin d h i s

.
’
own stakeholder to blow back the bi g ,
bundle of coin he had coughed up Jack ,
tumbled that he d been crossed

’
Then he squawked
. It .
took lotsa time to round up th e m grifters but Jack kept after ,
’
em til he broke up the gang
’
.
B irds that get primed for big w i n n i n s take long chances ’

,
and they hate a five cent piece like Farmer Burns or Tom
-
S harke y .
1 70
A l ong the B uckt o wn Ri a l t o .
We had some c o r k i n variety theatres an d ’
dance halls i n Buc k town in the ol d d a y s ,
too—Jac k M c P ar t l an d S Bij ou P erl Gal

“ ” ’
vin s “
S tandard O sc ar Raphael s O r
” ’ “
,
’
p h e u m Brick Mun ro s “
Pavilion, an d ’
,
J o c k y M a n w a r n i n gs
“
D ance H all The m
” ’
.
eh t e r p ri s i n a mu sement p l aces catered ’
es p ecially to the needs of restless ro un d ers

lookin for speedy entertainment ’
They .
toplined the cheesy s l a p s t i c k e r s and rasp y

voiced crowbaits that coul d ta k e a rise outa sou sed rub e s .
O p e r at i n on the all night schedule and glucose circuit thin g s

’
-
,
’
didn t hit the right stride till the clock in the steeple stru ck
a d ozen or so Brick Munro ori ginated the cabaret at h i s
.
“ ”
Pavilion and it spread over the country like wildfire
, .
Understand sport that was b ack in the time of the

, ,
World s Fair at Chicago when Fatima L ittle E gypt an d

’
, , ,
other greasy lookin egyptian dames on the M idway S lippe d

-
’
in to their bead dresses and veils and d one the hoo chie “
k o och ie
”
a new style dance that d idn t wear out much shoe
,
-
’
S nakey
,
leather nor need a waxed floor .
eye d arabs with black whiskers and y al l e r

teeth made squawky mu sic with wheez y
cla r ine t s and honk y t o n k y t o m t o m S -
,
h e l p i n the dancers w ith that weird oriental

’
t wi t c h i n
’
.
A complete change in dancin style s ’
was noticed in this country shortly after ,

’
that wi g gl e d y harem movement makin
quite a hit Then the good old quadrille
.
,
V irginia reel two step polka schottische

, , , ,
an d other dances h av i n hoof action seemed too tame the ’

, ,
young folks sourin on that stone age stu ff S o the ol d tim e

’
-
.
d ances go t the hoo k .
1 71
T HE M WA S T HE GO OD OLD DAYS
In the old days they used one caller for the square
dances N o w d ay s they got a lota b awlers w a t c h i n to s e e
.
’
,
’
that pivoters dance the round dance on the square .
J o c k y M a n w ar n i n g b ein a h u s t l i n youn g guy in them

’ ’
times wanted to operate his dump on uptodate lines so he

, ,
introduced the cu b an grind

“
a dance imported b y s o j e r s ,
that done S ervice in tenderloin districts down in Porto Rico .
L ater Joc k p ut on the grizzly b ear a dan ce that made a

”
,
b ig hit with sailors right o ff the whalers along the Barb ary
coast in Frisco P eop l e floc k ed to Joc k s place to have a loo k
’
.
’
.
S l u m m i n parties got fashiona b le and they usta v i sit Joc k s

’ ’
,
to glom the new dances— sometimes takin a whirl at em ’ ’

,
just for the fun of the thing .
W hen the orchestra played the S treets of Cairo the ,
popular selection at that time the dancers would S ing ,
She nvr w h r
e e sa of C i r o
t e s t e e ts a
On h Mi d w y h h d n v r r y
,
t e a s e a e e s t a e d
n v r w h h ooch i k h i
,
She e e sa t e e -
oo c e
P oo r l i l cou n r y m i d
,
tt e t a .
That was durin the ragtime musical period s p ort w h en

’
, ,
co on songs was all the rage and white b oys and gals usta ,
S ing A ll Coons L oo k A li k e
“
to M e ” “
A ll I Want is My ,
Black Baby Bac k ” “

I Want ,
” “
a Real Coon M istah ,
J o h n s i n
g Turn Me L oose , ,
and My C oal Blac k L ady

“
.
The Cakewal k was at the

“ ”
height of i t s glory “
L ittle ,
A nnie Rooney wa s hittin ’
the s k ids and “

Y oo hoo ”
,
-
’
wasn t even dreamed of Cal .
i s t h e n i c s and the contortions

k inda got tangled with foot
wor k the tango b unny hug , ,
-
,
and foxtrot co m in to the ’
front later with the ga s b u s and m o an i n saxophone

,
’
.
When J o c k y M an w ar n i n g came to town from his farm

over near Coal Valley last winter to u p and dow n the old ,
- -
1 72
S kun k Riv e r A m e ni t ie s .
When P ac k e y M c Far
land and Kid H erman was
matched for the bi g go at
the old C oliseum to deci d e ,
'
who was to take on B at t l in
Nelson for the lightwei gh t
championship some g um ,
shoe snoopers g ot to the

gover nor out at D e s Moines ,
s t agi n the bi g knock j ust ’

,
when things was all s e t .
They had the nerve to tell him that our little party was to
be a prize fight instead of a b o x i n m atch ! Kinya beat it ? ’
A t that time the gov happened to be gr an d s t an d i n for ’
the high grass vote of the local grangers lod g e out in A p

-
p an o o s e county so he wired the s h e ri ff of g ood ol d S cott

,
co unty astin him to bloc k the big mill Then t h i nk i n the

,
’
.
,
’
wires or s u m p i n might g et crossed the gov ordere d t h e

, , ,
militia company to the ringside to be sure of ma kin a recor d ,

’
for hi sself for the comin election ’

.
It wa s a grand S i g ht that moonlight evenin sport to ’

, ,
s e e them dashin young s o j e r boys of C ompany B marchin

’ ’
four abreast with loaded rifles d own the street to the C oli
, ,
seum that old shack bein pac k ed to the rafters with s ports
,
’
an d fight fans from all over the west .
Nobody ever hear d of the folks in the Capital of the

good old S tate of S cott County interferiu with the folks that ’
live out where the tall corn grows or astin them to pipe ,
’
down on their S p o r t i n stu ff N ot much ! S o after the ol d

’
. ,
C ol was filled the doors was loc k ed from the inside s o s the y
, ,
’
wouldn t b e no i n t e r r u p t i n of the services and then Y oun g

’ ’
,
M c G o v e r n and P ete Giese opened the S how with a priz e

waltz of six stanzas f o l l y e d b y Biz Mackay and A d Wolgast
,
in a ten round p e t t i n party Then Malachy H ogan cal l e d

-
’
.
1 75
P ac k e y and the Kid to the center of the ring and s e e i n that ,

,
’
their hands w as nicely manicured he told em to b e careful ,

’
and not S lap too hard and to play for the wri sts Then the , .
gong sounded and everything j u s t l i k e at a regular fi ght

, , , ,
and them two b lood thi rsty maulers done -
their cele b rated soft sho e s k etch -

.
The s o j e r b oys filled a l l the choice

front row ringside seats and they had the -
,
time of their young lives k i d d i n the would ’
b e c h am p e e n s on their onion stuff .
Captain O liver W K ulp was cal led .
out to D e s M oines by the gov a few days

later to S lip him the how come on the,
-
hokum of the night of the b ig scrap The .
cap told the gov that it was a nice friendly

exercise in wrist S l a p p i n between friends to get the money
-
’
, ,
and any p o r k h e ad that s aw an y t h i n g r e s e m b l i n prize fig h t i n ’ ’
that evenin had him cheated for optical range low visi b ility
’
, ,
’
illusion and all round imagination
,
-
.
The gallant young cap had h i s picher printed in all the

leadin newspapers of the country the next m o r n i n ri g ht
’ ’
alongside the gov s L otsa nosey people thought them t wo

’
.
b oys was p l ay i n the spotlight in a b eauty contest and as

’
, ,
O llie had it all over the gov when it come right down to
classy mug stu ff he was voted the best loo k in so j e r guy in
,
-
’
the H awkeye state .
That wasn t the first time S port that them there D es

’
, ,
M o i n e s e r s got a set b ack for b ut t i n in on our private parties

-
’
.
Why away b ack in the real old days when E rnst Claussen
, ,
was fil l i n the mayor s chair to capacity them pleasure c limi

’ ’
,
n at o r s got w o r r y i n and l o s i n sleep b ecause we had eight

’ ’
per cent b rew summer gardens dances and everything

, So , , .
this governor party ta k es his pen in hand an d tries to give

’ ’
our mayor a nice friendly j a c k i n u p tellin him to tune -
,
down the s p o r t i n lay in this b urg tell the fol k s to douse the
’
,
candle at nine ta k e an early hop in the hay and ma k e a stall

, ,
at b ein good be it ever so painful

’
,
.
That evenin there happened to b e a m e e t i n of the city

’ ’
council at the old city ha l l b u i l d i n on Brady street b etween ’
, ,
1 76
1 78
T h e H u m a n Fl y at t he B urt i s .
EN if the gu y that d esigned the

’
Burt i s O pera house didn t k n o w i t ,
’
sport he made easy pickin s for the
,
first human fly O n each si d e of .
the entrance from the ground to

,
the roof b r ickwork columns st o o d

,
out with every seventh brick i n

,
’
dented a n inch s o s to make them,
columns look pretty L eadin o ut .

’
from nigger heaven up near the

-
,
top a b alcony extended over to

,
the fancy step brickwork c o l um ns

-
.
Mebbe that balcony wasn t as h i g h ’
’
a s the Kahl b ui l d i n but i t seemed ,
higher in them times That step .
brickwork mad e fine t o e h o l t an d , ,
with the balcony w as ducksoup for ,
litt l e Joc ko Kane of C orkhill the , ,
original hum an fly and the fi rst kid ,
to climb t h e B urtis bricks .
O n e evenin when Kate Olax ’

,
ton w as p l a y i n The D ouble Mar

“ ’
”
riage little J ocko climbed up t h e
,
bricks to the b alcony stepped o ver ,
the iron r a i l i n raised the win d ow

’
, ,
walked in and took a ringsi d e seat

,
in nigger heaven .
S ay sport—the kids that watched little J ocko ma ke that

,
first climb hel d their breath t h i n k i n every minute he d f all

,
’ ’
and be dashed to minc e meat on t h e s i d e w al k ,

L ater on .
they nerved up to climb the bricks too and some nights the y
, ,
had a regular p e rc e ss i o n Got s o Charlie Kindt h ad t a hire J im

.
Wafer T i l e b e i n or some fly d i c k to m o m aroun d e v e n i n s

, , ,
’
’
to keep th em boys from makin the a sc e nsion .
1 79
T HEM WA S T HE GO OD O LD DAYS
There w a s other ways of b e at i n the gate at the Burtis ’

,
too— li k e s n e a k in m on afternoons and h i d i n under the

’
,
’
gallery b enches til the S how started’

H ad t a keep darn quiet .
,
though cause if Matt L am b or old Joe Bro wn the b ill

,
’
,
’
poster heard you cough or laugh they d hustle you out s o
, ,
quic k it d ma k e yer head swi m

’
.
U sta clim b the high gate alongside the Kimball house

sometimes to S l ip thr o ugh the laundry and crawl up under
,
the stage Then h a d t a watch a chance wh en nobody was

.
,
loo k in snea k up stairs past the actors d r e s s i n rooms clim b

’
,
’ ’
,
a ladder up under the roof crawl along the rafters over the,
big dome— all dark as pitch— away out to the front of the
theatre and slip throu gh a cu b by hole into nigger he aven
,
- -
.
S ay sport— i f a kid ever missed h i s step or made a S lip

,
on that journey over the big dom e he d a tum b led down ,

’
through the plaster and splattered all over the dress circle .
Then on cold e v e n i n s when kids was w ai t i n around

’ ’
‘
and knoc k in their heels to gether to keep em warm me b be

’ ’
,
H enry Kerk er O scar Ko ehler Ike , ,
Mon k A nthony S chuyler or D ave , ,
B a k er or so m e ot h er dandy goo d ,
heart e d guy would blow along and

a s t Charlie Kindt would he let the
whole m o b in for a fiv e S pot When -

.
Charlie ans wered “

S lip me the ,
”
cush you d think them yo un g
,
’
savages would tear the steps to

pieces s t am p e d i n for nigger heaven ’
-
.
Then they was al l s e t to holler

“ ”
S u up ! S u up ! when any home
- -
towner he l ped out the b arnstormers

by c ar r y i n a spear or sumpi u ’
.
O ne evenin when H av e r l y s minstrels was p l ay i n

’
,
’ ’
,
Charlie w a s c o ac h i n ol d Til in front of the S how S h Op on

’ -
how to stop the k ids from c l i m b i n the bricks and old Jack ’
,
H averly was standin there l i St e n i n in on the gab

’ ’
.
“
D o you mean to tel l me ast old Jac k kinda a ston
”
, ,
i s h e d li k e that a youngster would risk his life c l i m b i n them

’
“
,
b ricks j ust to s e e a S how ? ”
1 80
Br e t Le s li e .
S t e v e H oga n .
1 82
THE M WA S THE GOO D O LD DAYS
h im what he could do to make Broadway S o little B ill y .
did the song and dance S t r o l l i n Through the Park —ri g ht

-
“ -
,
” ’
b ac k t here on the old Burtis stage .
Charlie patted the youngster to ,
encourage him and little B illy told ,
Murray again when he w as l e av i n

’
, ,
“
S ome day you ll s e e my name on ’
”
Broadway .
William A lb ert Johnston g ot

h i s start several years lat e r with
the Kickapoo medicine com p any ,
doin a blackface version of S troll

’ “
”
in Through the Park at Tamaroa
’ -
, ,
Illinois H e peddle d S a g wa an d
”
.
Rattlesnake O il durin i n t e r m i s
” ’
s ions b ut never took any of the

, ,
medicine hisself becau se a s he said later every time he

, , ,
s o l d a b o ttle it made him ga g

“ ”
.
I n C hica g o Billy worked aroun d theatres and later came

, ,
t o the front a s a tramp c omedian tourin the country un d er

’
,
t h e stage name of Bert L esli e in h i s o wn creation of that

c el ebrated character S teve H ogan
“
, H e was reco gn i zed as .
the slickest slan g ster o n the sta g e .
L ater B ert L eslie made g oo d on h i s boyhood boast

S ome day you ll s e e my name o n B roadway —whe n he
’ ”
starre d with Trixie Fr i gan zi in h i s o wn mu sical extrava g anz a ,
“
Town Topics ”
.The bi g scene of that S how represente d a
rehearsal back on the old Burtis stage with the C arb o n e ,
Brothers song and dan ce comedians in S t r o l l i n Thro ug h

,
- -
“
,
’
the Park . It was a scream .
I n a Broadway cafe one evenin C harlie Murray as t

,
’
,
B ert L eslie : Why d o you close your eyes when you d rin k
“
whiskey ? ”
A n d B ert replied I m afraid if my eyes s e e it
“
,
’
”
t hat it will m ake my mouth water and dilute the likker .
B ert L eslie never ha d an opportunity to do h i s st uff

in D avenport but he never forgot the days when he usta
,
climb the bricks at the Burtis .
Th em was the fine times S port Pat Walsh usta whistl e , .
”
Garryowen while h itchin h i s hosses to start work at five
’
1 83
o clock in the m o r n i n Bi ll y P etersen was h u s t l i n fifteen

’ ’ ’
,
hours a day p e d d l i n matches as fast as his b rother H enry

’
could make e m J J Richardson was t ry i n to put all the

’
, . .
’
’
ads top o f col umn next to readin matter in that paper of
- - - - - -
his n Billy B ettendorf w as l e ar n i n p r i n t i n b y pump i n a

’
,
’ ’ ’
f o o t t r e ad l e on a j ob press and little B J P almer w a s S h o w i n

’
. .
,
speed when the salesladies in S aint O n g e s department store ’
tapped their pencils on the showcases and hol l ered Cash ! “ ”
We had the spirit of seventy six in real life in them times -

,
too with the finest dr u m corps that ever stepped down the
,
line . L P D osh w as fife r G u s Redding done the dou bl e drag

. .
,
-
on the snare drum and little H ank Brown whanged t h e b as s

,
drum with b oth hands Them old boys w as hard boile d civi l
’
-
.
war vets and when they got wor k in you could feel electricity
,
’
r un n i n up and down your spine

’
.
There wasn t no ad clu b s in them days s p ort b ut B ob

’ ‘
, ,
Poole S howed grocers h o w t a ginger up b usiness at h i s Brad y

street store O ld Bo b stood i n front of h i s counter along
. ,
;
side a b ar r e l of mixed candy and handed each customer a

.
,
little b ag of candy The wi mmen .
floc k ed in there fro m Rockingham ,
Goosetown H am b urg Rogertown , , ,
C orkhill and all points north , ,
d r a gg i n their kids dolled in ging

’
,
ham and c o p p e r t o e S hoes to buy ,
a b ar of soap or s u m p i n and get a ,
’
bag of candy They d make halfa .
dozen calls s p l i t t i n their orders ,

’
’ ’
so s they d get a bag of candy each
time B ut old Bo b only smiled . ,
and when little tads held w i s h i n ’
parties mashin their noses on the ,

’
windows he d b ribe em to move ,

’ ’
b y givin em a b ag of candy ’ ’
.
Moun ted a platform over their big factory on Third , , ,
b e tween Main and H arrison W o e b e r Brothers had a big ,
b uggy for an ad v e r t i s i n S ign that co ul d b e seen from all’

,
parts of town S ears and Frizzell had a stu ffed gray hoss
. ,
all harnessed to draw trade to their harness S hop

,
O ther -
.
184
Ol d J d d Bir t hpl a c e
’
azz a s .
B O B — I f any of you young fellers h as

AY ,
got the id ea that j azz music is new stu ff ,
you k in ta k e another guess for yo u rself .
U s old timers k new th e j az z daddy— the

old bird that di sc overed this s y n c 0 p at i n ’
movement that starts all the shoul d er

sha k in n o w d ay s ’ ’
.
O ld John Biehl of Rock Island w as , ,
the first j azz b o— with h i s little 13 flat clari

net and Charli e Bleuer helped that old
,
’
tr o uper along with that work by pushin
groans moans and so b s through h i s slide
, ,
tr o mbone Them two babies w a s the .
o ri g inal j a z z h o un d s and they didn t nee d cowbells banj o e s ’

, , ,
c uckoo clocks nor boiler factories to cover u p punk f ak i n like

’
-
these sa i nt V itu s a rti sts that mutilates melody in these times

-
.
O ld John could make h i s s qua w s t i c k cackle like a plymouth

r ock rooster squeal like a razorback porker or wh i n n e y like
, ,
a missouri mule .
O ld Jo h n had lotsa class as an imitator .
I n these S peedy times when a jazz professor organ izes ,
h i s herd he draws on !Watertown for a t r o m b o n e r on Mount

, ,
Pleas ant for a sa x o p h o n e r l o co es a f o r d fix e r for fi d rasper

, ,
’
and ropes a c l am d i g g e r to wallop the p i an n e r Then b ein . ,
all s e t a b l i n k e y snowbird tu rns the music upside down

, ,
gives the high S ign with the baton and says C mon fellers
—
“ ’
, , ,
’
l e s go !
”
A nd they re o ff ! ’
In the ol d days whe n E mil Ziegler and Muz Reddick

,
run dances at Miller s hall H u b er s garden and on the old

’
,
’
,
Ri v e r h o r s e to O ff e r m an n s island John Biehl and his band

’
boys would play five or s i x e n cores for Maggie Murp h y s

“ ’
H ome as them Rock Island dancin bugs never coul d get

”
,
’
fed up on that tinkly tune a b out the little Murph y gal .
They d keep Si n gin

’ ’
1 87
THE M T HE GOOD O LD
WA S DAYS
Th re e s
’
or g n i h p rlor
an a n t e a
To gi v h h ou on
e t e se a t e,
An d y ou r w lco m v ry
’
e e e e e e -
ven -
nin
’
A M ggi Murp h y Hom '

t a e s e.
A nd the only way the j az zm as t e r could flag them dancin ’
radicals was to kiyi li k e a coon fl e a h o un d hittin it up the ’
alley with a can tied to h i s tail Then Charlie Bleuer Tony .

,
and George Biehl and George S t r o e h l e would j oin up with

,
old John and give a correct i mitation of nineteen twenty two -
j azz as done in these times .
In them days gals held up their long dresses with one

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hand when dancin to keep em from trailin and to h elp ,
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the eye play of no sey an k le

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S potters They wore high

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collars and not k n o w in

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nothin about this n e c k i n ’
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and parkin naturally they ,
never got i n touch with the

real jazz punch these b ob
h aired sweeties puts ove r
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now d ay s .
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That s when Phil M il
ler di scovered that e xc i t i n ’
outdoor sport of gr ab b i n ’
D avenport tinho rns on S ec

ond avenue fo r fast d ri v i n fi
with old wind b roken livery -
’
plugs that couldn t knock
o ff a mile in eight ten on a -
b et
. Then our genial old
Judge Cropper curried h i s
whiskers an d romped into the g ame with a dash of S pee d
and sacked them yaps for the limit—the j udge bein a patri ’
otic guy an d stron g for u p h o l d i n the peace and di g ni ty of ’
the grand ol d state of I llinois .
A ny of y ou newspa p er boys ever heard of little Mike

Radigan that usta j erk the lever on switch engine n umbe r
S ix on the Peoria and Rock Islan d in the old days ? Say ,
sport there was the original wh i s t l i n k i d !

, M ike could ’
1 88
W h a t M ad e Ro ck I s l an d G re at .
indeed S port— t h elm w as

Y es , , _
the g ood old days in Roc k Island .
Jack and Tom G r e e h e y w as hog

headin freight on the Brooklyn ’
division Jack and Tom Pen d er ,
k icked empties down the sidetrack

in the Rock Island swi tchyards ,
and Pat and Johnny M urrin pu l le d

the throttles on S aint L ouis pass
enger trains on the Q A nd listen .
,
—what them six big huskies di d n t ’
know about r ai l ro a d i n they couldn t learn from gl o m m i n

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time tables nor from B en Ca b le nor from R R nor even

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,
from Bi g Chief Kim b all hisself .
That s when the H ardly A ble club had a fis h an d chow

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d er camp at Rock river with some fine .old stagers on i t s

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roster— guys li k e Buck O B r i e n Mule Rispen Gibe G i b s e n’
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Jumbo Kelly D utchy Ro s e nfi e l d Po k e L ambert S tu ff Mc

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Mahon Ben S tempel Nic k N ewcomb E ddie S tempel D an

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Finnegan Kit A tkinson and a lota other ste m winders that

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would peel the shirt o ff n their backs for a pal that was right
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When Major Beardsley C olonel D anforth and Cy D art , ,
clashed on In g ersoll at the H arms Gottlieb the b arboy

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sai d the y wa s sucha nice mans it w as st e w bad they wasn t

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Ch e r m an s Gottlieb went weepy about Walter R o s e n fie l d

.
bein o ut al uc k . too but he stood pat on one proposition

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Robert Wagner was a g reater all round guy th an Richar d -

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Wa g ner the m o o s i k b u g
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S tone c ut t i n w as a regular profession and Joe B ob and

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C harlie E vans Bob and T o m C ox D ick and Bill L loyd an d

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other e fficiency experts was t r i m m i n stone and eight hours ’
at the bi g A rsenal store houses s o that Uncle S am wo ul d-

,
hav e some real h o n e s t a go d b u i l d i n s ready when the bi g war ’
starte d.
1 91
T HE M WA S THE GOOD OLD DAYS
Jac k Cady and C harlie Sk inner w as S h o w i n the youn g ’
tri m s of Mo l ine how to do that new two step dance an d -

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George H untoon drove his little roan and side b ar buggy up

and down the avenue on sunny afternoons t r y i n out his ,
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lamps on long distanc e work-

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S alsbury s T r o ub ad o r s play ed two consecutive nights

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for Ben H arper at H arper s theatre at fifty b uc k s per with

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Nate S alsbury a s top comedian A buxo m little gal in short

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skirts made a big hit with the g allery gods that pac k ed nig
ger heaven when she sang The Torpedo and the W hale
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and it s a ten to one Sh ot there ain t an old timer that showed

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his mug in the j a m that kin

remem b er the n ame of that
little gal .
D on t S pose you birds ’ ’
ever heard a b out H arry Mc

D arrah that usta be the
whole wor k s on the ferry
boat H arry was engineer .
,
fireman c o al p as s e r and the , ,
rouster H e usta b ra g that .
“
he could Ch ub b l e more
t h u e l than annie man that
iver stud f e r n i s t a s t ai m b o a t
” ’
b iler No matter how cold .
the weather H arry never ,
w e r e a coat or vest and ,
always had his S hirt sleeves

rolled up to hi s shoulders .
H arry s the boy that start ed ’
the strenuous life b usiness that T R got away w ith by . .

,
b e g i n n i n wor k at four thirty in the m o r n i n and knockin o ff

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at nine thirty in the evenin —e x c e p t i n when he rowed the

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ferry s k i ff on stormy nights after Chin L awhead or th e reg

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ular oarsmen g ot b uc k fever and l aid down on the j o b .
When H arry got tired workin he d bank his fires and ’ ’
mosey up to O h l w e i l e r s o r E ckermann s and after dustin

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the high collar o ff n a coupla b i g o n e s he d tell them lun ch
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1 92
T HE M
(
WA S T H E (3 0 0 0 OLD DAYS
ond fi d and he never run outa gas when ga bb in about h o ni n

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razors or can S hootin with S lim M c Co r m i c k S horty Wil

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liams Johnny Meehan or the other b oys

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that soldiered at Buford s plow factory .
P l o w fi t t i n was the b est trade in them

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days and when a kid got strong enough

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to help out with the f amily larder he d ’
land at Buford s at plow fit t i n g r i n d i n ’
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or m o l d i n and think it was soft pickin s ’
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Topsy S iemon was S lug three at the A rgus on S even

t e e n t h street p o un d i n up bourgeois at twenty fiv e cents a
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thousand ems from horace greeley w r i t i n that H arry S imp

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s o n hung on the hoo k not h av i n any typewriters in them ’

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days . E li M o s en fe l d e r S t arted to learn j ob p ri n t i n b ut ’

,
when he learned it was easier to grab the j ack by buyin ’
i i h
’
p r n t n
’
than by sellin it he chucked t e job and started
, a
cl o th in store
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Frank Wheelan was t y p e s t i c k e r on the Union and he ,
S prinkled lotsa commas throu g h Burdette s english j oke ’
column . When the weekly was printed on Thursdays Bur ,
dette grab b ed the first sheet t h at A dam Kramer run o ff on

the old Potter press and squatted on an ink keg in the alley
,
to enj o y hisself l augh i n at real comic stu ff E xc e p t i n a

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coupla r az b e r r i e s that plowed corn out near Reynol d s the ,
only guys that could squeeze a titter on them e n glish puns

was Walter Johnson M erc D r i ffil l Jonas Bear and Johnn y
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D i n d i n ge r Folks had a dar k s u s p i s h that Johnny D ing was

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b u l lin old time bull when he cackled at them j ohnny bull

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wheezes D in g b ein a t o l ab l e kidder in them days

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1 94
Th e D o p e on Chie f B l ack H awk .
Y ou kin tell the world S port that Rock Islan d had the , ,
ace of the old timers Big Chief Blac k H awk was the darb
.
that led em al l and these picher pain ters has got that injun
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boy wrong M e b be y ou ve seen the o il .

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p ai n t i n that shows the Bi g Chief squatted

in front of his W igwam takin a solemn drag ,
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on his pipe a bunch of squaws s t i r r i n a ,

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soup kett l e and a stream of smoke o o z i n ,

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up in the air A nd mebb e you got the idea .
that the big red b oy w as goin to have do g ’
soup for supper To make that picher look .
romantic like the movies the painter guy , ,
said the Big Chief w as b r o a d c as t i n smoke ’
signals to the braves around C oal Valley and Taylor Rid g e ,
tellin em everythin g is j a k e on the Watch Tower crops i s

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lookin fine and give our regards to all the folks

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Not s o Black H awk wasn t b r e w i n dog soup sport

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H e was o p e rat i n a heap big ten gallon still and workin up

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a batch of prime corn hooch that gauge d

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two h undred and ten mule proof it bein
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falltime and the corn was ripe and juicy .
When the S acs an d Foxes s aw that

smoke signal they got foxy— cause they ’
knew the S tar O ld Timer was S l i p p i n a gain ’

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and that he d get properly l i k k e r e d durin
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the evenin bust up a coupla pigeon t e ed
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squaws and start an oldtime b allyhoo all up

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and down the reservation .
Then with a S p l i t t i n holdover t h e next

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m o r n i n he d hit the warpath and paint the

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Rock river valley a S k yblue pink P roba -

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bly you heard how them injun braves was fl e e t footed an d -
coul d run all day without s t o p p i n for feed or water Well ’

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they h ad t a step lively when Big Chief Black H awk yelped h i s
1 95
b lood -
c ur d l i n
warcry all soused to the ears and hit the tra i l
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That s why them b ig inj uns built the b ig cave on the A rsenal
’
at the end of the b ridge— s o s they could dig in when the Bi g ’
Chief wa s r am p a gi n ’
.
That name Blac k H aw k h a s some punch ,
S port and lotsa detective agencies drugstores

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hotels m attress factories garages n e a r b e e r

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j oints and chem ical companies are named in

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honor of the Bi g Chief .
When Roc k Island w a s S uitcase M e t r o p

olis of the W est a lota D avenport shortchange
,
S pecialists joined the caravan to that b urg to help make the

wor l d safe for guys that lifted high ones or needed a S hot in
the arm They volunteered to help the natives take care of
.
visitors t h at fl o c k e d in from S trawberr y P oint O quaw k a

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L etts L ow M oor and all points west

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A ny guy b avin a loose piece of change in his kick

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cou l d certainly get wholesome entertainment .
Them w a s the good o l d days S port and S econd avenue , ,
was S hinin b righter than Broadway or Coney island

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If Roc k Is l and cou l d sidestep the Volstead proposition

now and stage a suitcase come b ac k they d need a coupla
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thousand t r afli c cops to line up flivs that would roll in fro m

the wilds of Iowa and the D akotas They could add two .
million to the population i n S ix months and c over the corn ,
fi e l d s of Roc k river valley with b ungalows and swiss villas

crowded away to the roof with snowb irds an d
thirst brea k ers -
.
L otsa guys in Rock Islan d is belly achin -

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about h i g h c o s t of cobwe b gown s and o h b o y

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S t o c k in s that their dames i s ringin up on
charge account and they re t r y i n to skim p on ,
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the eats b y plantin radishes and lettuce in ’
their back yards If them saps had the noo d le .
of a j ack rab b it they d plant fig trees and get

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in on next year s styles before the N ew Y ork ’
frogs and kikes corner the figl e af market .
Them s the birds that ll tell the ladies what kinda to g s they
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kin wear next summer .
1 96
T HEM WA S T HE GO OD O LD DAYS
Mount I das Pilots Firs t Wards and other companies chimed

, , ,
in with their b ells givin a finer concert than the S wiss bell ,
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rin g ers .
Milt Rowser Frank B o y l e r D ick Kelly and H en Cooper

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was e n j Oy i n a game of seven u p at Cal Witherspoon s when
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the alarm sounded and in the excitement they rushed out ,
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without S e t t l i n .
The Fire King b ein the only company that knowed where ’
the fire was th e m other companie s h ad t a wait f o r the water

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works whistle to b low so s they d get the number of the ward ’ ’

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In them times if the waterwor k s whistle b l o wed one ,
long b last it was a S ignal that the fire was out and then them
, ,
fire laddies would stick around to chew a b out where they w a s

and what they w as doin when the alarm sounded givin all ’
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the details Bein as the boss couldn t doc k em when called

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on fire duty they did some w h o p p i n story tellin every time

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they was called to a fire .
It took lotsa tim e for the Fifth Wards to get started

that day S port L ouis A rnould the foreman w a s S h i n gl i n
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a roof for A ndy Roach when the King s b ell rung and Mick ’
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D elaney D inny H ickey H enny H iggins Jim G ah o n Gene

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D eutsch Billy O a k es Mike H eeney Jim L eonard P ete Gil

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l o o l e y Jack Ca vanaugh Gil A rnould Joe D ugan and B r yan

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Toher was scattered all over to wn wor k in at their trades b ut ,

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at the first crac k of the bell they dropped their tools to hot
foot it to the h o s eh o u s e .
H umb a Kelly first t o r c h b o y w as s t i c k i n type on the

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Blue Rib b on N ews and he bolted out the do o r without wait ,
i n to space out his line or s ay a word to E d Collins the

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foreman Grunter O D o n n e l l second

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t o rc h b o y j umped o ff L i l l i s s grocery
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wagon and hun g up a new record

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s p rint in to the h o s e h o u s e
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D an M c Farl an d assistant fore ,
man was tappin wheels on the Roc ky

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Mountain limited at the P erry stree t

depot and he trun his hammer to Tom
,
B ehan and Johnny Cody and rushed ,
home for his S ilver plated trumpet red ,
1 99
S hirtand castiron hat as
,
fu l l un i f orm
, D an always wor k ed in
when fi r e fig h t i n Firemen in them times w a s always b raver
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when they had time to tend to their ma k e u p ’

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Foreman A rnould w a s a stic k er for system with the Fifth .
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Wards and wouldn t let them lad s start f o r a fire till they
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knew where it w a s no matter how restless they got nor h o w

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hard they pulled on the h o s e c art rope Wa i t til you hear .
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the waterworks whistle ! was the orders he blasted through
his silver plated trumpet-
H e called the roll that day and . ,
every b ody answered e x c e p t i n L arry M c K e e he bein down ’

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at Col um b us Junction k i c k i n o ff empties on a side trac k ’

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When the waterwor k s whistle b lowed five times it wasn t ,

’
no time at al l til them Fifth Wards came t e ar i n around the

’ ’
corner at Fifth and Iowa— the foreman and assistant foreman
Wa i t ’
ti l y ou hea r th e w r wor k wh i l
a te s s t e !
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roarin out important orders through their silver plated trum -
e t sL that company b ein tied with the N orthwest D avenports ’

p
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and E ast D avenport Pilots for last place in the race .
Them firemen was all o u t al u c k that day for some little ,
guy weighin about one twenty strapped a bab cock e x t i n

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g s h e r on his back c l u m b a lad d er crawled along the roof

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took a coupla squirts at the blaze and the fire was all over ,
e x c e p t i n the bi g postmortem confab of them gal lant firemen

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That Fifth Ward company was a sore outfit S port b ein , ,

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all s e t to Sh ow the people what k inda fi r e fi g h t e r s they was -

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not even b avin to unreel the hose nor givin D inny H ickey
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2 00
Pio n e e r W ork in Cu b i s t Art .
Them was he good old days sport That s when C harlie ,

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Russell usta grind out Brea kfast S lices on the first page
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of the old Gazette for eight buc k s a wee k A f ter p u t t i n up

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halfa column of para g raphs C harlie filled the column with ,
“
News S ummary in leaded nonpareil , .
W hen D ave Rohm the foreman hung , ,
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that fat take on the hook Tim ,
H ickey G u s Brooks Patsey M c Gl y n n

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Bill A xtman George Bailey H enry , ,
P fab e and the other printers woul d pull

,
out for it as the y was se t tin solid ,

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b revier at two bits a thousand ems ’

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Charlie Russell was soft p an h an d l i n for ’
the old typo tourists and his copy w a s easy to read but h i s
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dad s wr i t i n looked like it was done by H arry S impson and

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that kinda h e n s c r at c h i n drove many a type sticker to drink

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B ird Richar d son drove the first automobile on the S treets

on the fourth of July nineteen hun dred one and him and his
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gang g ave the natives the surprise of their lives .
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There wasn t no screwy yaps hangin around then to ’
s ay
“
I personally but late one S aturday night when Jo h n
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H asson was goin home with his usual he dared the soldier
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to come down o ff the monument to fight and John g ot away ,
with his blu ff .
L afe and Walt L ancaster were the cleverest all round -

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acro b ats in the burg and no entertainment was complete

“
without L afe and Walt on the p rogram doin their grind ’

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J oe H e b ert usta S ing Nancy L ee with that fine b ari

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tone voice o f his n and h e wasn t stingy with it
, In the ’
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home talent S how of P inafore

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Joe took the part of S ir ,
J oseph Porter ma k in a big hit S ingin

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Wh e n 1 wa s a l a d I s e e d m y t e m rv r
As o c
ffi e b o y i n a n a t t e
'
3 orn y
fir m
wa s h e d th e i d s w n ow
and l s cru
b b ed th e fl oor
pol up n l of f r o n oor
,
And i s he d the ha d e th e b i g t d .
2 03
An old rounder complained to N ic k Newcom b one time

that he couldn t get any wor k Nick hired him for three
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b uc k s a day to ta k e a b ric k in each hand carry em across the ,

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street s e t em down pick em up carry em bac k and then

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repeat A t the end of the second day Nick h ad t a hir e two

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extra b ar k eeps to moisten curious fol k s that laid o ff at the

E agle wor k s and the sawmil l s to watch the brick man work .
D ad L ower drove his S peedy pacer Captain Jinks

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along S econd street and all the other h o s s m e n h ad t a ta k e

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his dust Waiter gals at the Commercial house would call

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ram lamb S heep o r mutton on the bill of fare and saloons
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kept ei ght day matches in b ig stone match b oxes at the end

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of the bar .
Jim Rhodes usta laugh and a s t What i s your corpor ,
o s i t y and how d o you s a g as h i a t e ?

”
when he d S ha k e flippers ’
with a brother oddfellow or an axe c ar r y i n mem b er of the -

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woodmen degree team .
S teeplej ack O scar W iley would stand on his head on a

smokestack and holler li k e a kic k apoo when he w as stewed ,
and people expected to s e e him get killed O scar wasn t in .

’
no hurry though for he waited patiently ab out to let nature

, ,
and Barleycorn ta k e the regular course .
S mo k ey Reese bl owed a co m et when he drilled down the

street with his chimney sweep makeup high cone S hape d -
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skimmer rope and tac kl e

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H e could .
go through a chimney l i k e a swallow ,
and chimney soot had a fat ch ance -
when S mo k ey got on i t s trail .
George Bagley express me s senger ,
on the Rock Island road wanted to get ,
ri ch quic k s o he stepped o ff the train

,
with a hundred thousa nd dollars in

greenba cks in a gunny sac k walked up ,
to Kellog g s barn at S ixteenth and

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Iowa and cached it under the hay That s gettin it fast
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sport The train stopped for a half hour in th e m days and

. .
George had plenty time to get b ac k and ta k e hi s place before

the train pulled out When that stac k of long green was
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2 04
Then Ira took that b lac k paint and done a finer j ob of

p ai n t i n than old man Rembrandt ever dreamed of
’
A streak .
of b lack decorated every other white ri b of D olly with b lack ,
streamers over her b ack and flan k s wide black stripes around ,
her legs and big black S pots on her nec k sW h e n Ira finished
, .
the art wor k on D olly s h e made a fin e r lookin zebra than

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any that Barnum had in his b ig me n ageri e— e x c e p t i n that S h e ’
looked li k e a leopard from the nec k up Them kids took a .
moonlight inspectio n of the old mare and they agreed that ,
I ra was gifted with the divi ne fire .
But some fol k s S port i s s h y on artistic taste and it

, , ,
happened that C ap Bryson was one of them kinda guys He .
didn t appreciate art nor p a i n t i n and when he clapped h i s

’ ’
peepers on old D olly the next m o r n i n all striped an d spotted ’

, ,
he went straight up The cap made an awful beller to Chief

.
Kessler and o ffered the large reward of five bucks for the
, .
arrest and conviction of the culprit the cap not d i s c r im i n at i n ,

’
between a classy artist and a common culprit .
When that pain t dried on old D olly it fell o ff an d took

the hair with it givin the old mare a b lac k and tan z ebra
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e ff ect E very time the cap loo k ed at old D olly he b urned

.
up and he k ept his re w ard of five b ucks posted at the hoose

,
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gow hopin to land the culprit
,
.
A number of years later when Ira L ingafelt was v i s i t i n

,
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in the old to wn he met Cap Bryson one day an d as t him

, ,
did he ever land t h e guy that put old D olly through the zebra
degree “
No said the cap fla r in right up but if I ever
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do I ll prosecute him promptly and to the full extent of the

,
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law .
Then Ira took the first train to C hicago and he ain t ,

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never been seen around these diggin s since .
2 06
Th u t h i e Th m i t h e r t h
’
Thi lly Ve rt h e t h .
When we had heatless days and lightless nights picher ,
shows and pivot p l aces were put o ff watch S ix days and nights
each wee k and little S usi e S mithers assem b led her woes in
,
s a d verse for the benefit of S am Greenebaum of the Garden
theatre. S usie lisped and after s h e got through p un c h i n her

,
’
typewriter her verses read this way
Thay Tham— l i t h e n !
,
T h ere t h
’
not a t h i n g l e plathe to go
T h i n t h e you clothed your t h w e l l picher t h h o w .
Gee whith ! I feel tho thad and b lue

My t h o l d i e r guy he th got the flu ’
.
I t h e l d o m t h w e a r but I ll thay D amn

,
“ ’
The K a i t h e r ! D on t you thay tho Tham ?

” ’
,
It al w ay t h make t h thome hit with m e

When I t h t r o l l down the t h t r e e t and thee
A cutie mith t h at t h out for bear
’
D r e t h e d like a h o r t h e with henna hair

, .
Thure thing ! each t h o l d i e r t i p t h b ith lid ,
A nd t h m e ar t h the t h al v e to t h i t h t h w e l l kid
'
Y our night t h c h o o l e lath ith c au t h i n g pain !

-
When thome poor nut t h p e l l t h for b ith j ane

The a d t h and t i t l e t h on the t h c r e e n
O ut loud— I want to b ut h t h i t h b e an .
May I t h ug g e t h t to t h o l v e t h e t h e p ut h l e t h
, ,
That t h e t h e t h m ar t t h p e l l e r t h uthe f at h e m ut h l e t h .
The j ack you t h p e n d for g at h o l i n e

To run that t h w e l l big l i m o u t h i n e
M ut h t thet you back tho me d i t h t an t h e ; and
T h e way you t h p e e d ith t h om e t h i n g grand !
’
T h e re t h not a buth that you let path
I ll tell the fo l k t h you t h h o w thome cl at h !
’
,
2 07
Y our o r gan i t h
out of date ;
t p l ay t h
H i t h t h t ufl don t t h e e m appropriate
’
Cau t h e when the hero w i n t h the doll

’
, ,
M e n d e l t h o n t h he p l ay t h T h at t h all !
”
’
I t th
’ ’
.
The b e t h t n o i t h e for a t h l i p p i n g b rother

“ ”
Ith J ut h t B efore the Battle M other , .
’
I t t h fie rt h e !
My girl f r i e n d t h are tho j e al o ut h
B e c au t h e tho many t h o l d i e r fe l l o wt h
Keep c h at h i n me It i t h a fright
’
.
I cop thome t h w e l l guy every night .
I t h u r e l y ought to b e a t h am e d
But g o o d n e t h t h ak e t h ! t h o u l d I be blamed ?
,
Y our movie t h h o p it t h e e m t h to me , ,
T h o u l d have a n u r t h e and n u r t h e r y
To thave our n e r v e t h i n c r e at h e our j o y t h , ,
A n d t h l i p the lid on d ad d y t h b o y t h ’
.
Then when t h e t h e t h m ar t k i d t h t h t ar t to beller

, ,
’
J u t h t t h l i d e em to the n ur t h r y t h e l l ar
’
.
O ur little M ar y t h O ! tho t h we e t ! ’
T h h e hath the o t her t h t ar t h all beat .
D on t thay I m thilly or a nut

’ ’
To want to play in m o v i e t h but , ,
With thom e nithe hero I ll thay t h i t h ,

’
’
I d t h h o w t h p e e d with that vampire kith .
When E thie J o n t h — the th my g irl chum

e
’
B al l t h me I ll thay the th going thome

,
’ ’
.
L at h t night E th t h i d Y our t h o l d i e g uy
a ,
“
r
Ith thure in bad—the t o wn t h bone dry ’

.
But I t h o p p e d E th I said O ! ith “

.
,
”
M i n e t h got y o ur t h t h k i n n e d ; he ain t no t h i t h y
’ ’ ’
!
When Charlie r e gi t h t e r t h t h urp r i t h e ,
Then t h l am t h the c h e e t h e and c u th t ard pieth ,
A nd t h o ak t h the villian on the be an ,
I clap my h an d t h an d t h t art to t h c r e am
208
Pre t ze l A lle y .
In the old days sport birthday , ,
cele b rations were very popular and ,
A leck A nderson had a birthday party

at least once a wee k That s how .
’
the Free and Indepen d ent Common

wealth o f P retzel A lley S tate of ,
S cott County U S A originated , . . .

, .
A lec k wa s first last and only mayor , ,
of Pretzel A lley .
O ne day A leck met the Korn

b oys—Bill Charlie O tto H arry and , , , ,
John— and ast them. wouldn t they ’
Slip up to his W igwam that evenin ’
as he was givin a birthday party ’
A B b y B e ave r
.
a
In them t i m es B ill Korn wore
.
b ushy hair on h i s knob and silky whiskers like a b aby beaver ,
and Bill said to A leck : “

Why you old Sardine ! Y ou had a ,
birthday last week and two the week before , S eems like .
you re t r y i n to skin old M e t h u s al e h on his record ?

’ ’ ”
A lec k
“ ’
answered Can t lose
, .
’
That evenin when the guests lined up for dutch lunch
, ,
the ice b ox was loaded for b ear and any wetware mentioned ,
on R o d d e w i g s or H aase s price list was on the

’ ’
sideboard W hen them boys got t h rough S ing

.
’
i n and dancin Bill Korn proposed o r g an i z i n
’ ’
,
Pretzel alley and after he outline d his plan the

,
p r e p o s i t i o n went over with a bang A n election .
’
was held on the spot and to start the ball rollin ,
A leck was elected mayor O n tak in the chair .

’
,
A leck appointed each of h i s g uests to an o ffic e

from treasurer to dog ketcher from alley cle rk -
,
to sext o n and from chief of police to al l ey

,
s cavenger . Nobody w as overlooke d while

A leck had the ap p o i n t i n fever Can t lose
“ ” ’
.
’
,
’
he declared as the party broke up at five o clock
,
.
2 11
Then Pretzel alley
started out to b ecome
famous A newspaper
.
reporter S pilled the news and the alley from , ,
Main to H arri son between Third and Fourth , ,
b ecame the gayest strea k in the town .
Pretzel al l ey had two political parties the ,
weiners and pretzels and the politicians put ,
o ve r S Otrn e redhot campaigns The mayor app eare d at council .
m e e t i n one evenin in full regalia and whispers of big graft

’ ’
,
in alley a ffairs got started h i s no b s bein accused of S hakin ,

’ ’
down gams street la b orers utility guys and S ports Folks

, , , .
started as k in “
W here did he g et i t ? —an d A leck answered
’
,
”
,
”
“
Can t lose
’
The mayor blowed ten thousand s ma ckers on
.
h i s second election the greatest m u d s l i n gi n campaign in

’
,
the history of Pretzel alley .
A flag raisin was held before that election after a torch

-
’
,
light p e r c e s s i o n that marche d all around town a ru b e band ,
fu r n i s h i n the music
’
S prea d eagle speec hes an d political
.
-
promises scramb led with music and vaud ev ille marke d that
, ,
election A leck bein a g ain elected un an ,

’
i m o usl y
The Pretzel alley volunteer fire de
0 11 1 6 11 5 9 p ar t m e n t w as organized with Charlie ,
Korn for chief an d Phi lly S onntag for

assistant and they gave an exhi b ition
,
one evenin for the benefit of the D av

’
e n p o r t city council and fire d e p artment .
The Pretzel firemen S howed S k ill at lad

’ ’
der c l i m b i n h o s e c ar t foo t racin and
,
-
,
H a v i n b o r r y e d a fir e
’
fancy c o up l i n .
’
’
man s red shirt and cast iron hat the -
,
chief S howed how to play ragtime on

his trumpet A fire broke out in a three.
story b u i l d i n durin that exhibition and

’ ’
,
a distracted mother rushed to the chi ef

“ ”
c ry i n
’
Who will save me che ild ? The
,
-
chief answered I the ch i ef of Pretz el , ,
fits h ono r the fil annr alley fire department W 111 save yo ur ,
212
election of city sc avenger Char l ie
Caswe l l had he l d that .
o ffice b ut growed tired of an s w e r i n telephone calls r e ga r d i n ’ ’
the loc ation of dead

cats dogs b illy goats
, ,
-
,
coons an d other duties

,
r e qu i r i n the attention
’
of the a l ley scav If a stew party slowed .

-
down a l ong a b out sun rise in the m o r n i n ’

,
some guy would get original and ring up

Ca S to tell him a gar b age b arrel w a s doin
’
a silent— noise solo down in Pretzel al l ey ,
or a hun k a lim b urger and a pun k onion

w a s p l ay i n a stoc k yards duet b ehind the
’
pic k le foundry .
Charlie Kindt and P aul L ago m a r c i n o

were nominated for that important o ffice and it w a s plain ,
that C harlie had the j um p on P aul and would win hands ,
down when it came to a vote Charlie delivered a great .
speech i m p l o r i n h i s friends to vote for P aul b avin in mind

,
’
,
’
the woes of Cas while h o l d i n that exalted offi ce ’

.
Emmet S haron B illy Chamberlin and L ew R o d d e w i g

, ,
Spread eagled in favor of Charlie b ut after P aul got down

-
,
on h i s knees and prayed b e g g i n his friends to vote for ,

’
Charlie there was nothin to i t — the show S h O p b oy w o n

,
’
-
hands down That night Charlie hopped the train for P alm
.
B each for a month s vacation A t the next m e e t i n of the

’
.
’
alley council the mayor a b olished the office of alley scav .
P retzel alley pu b lished an o fli c i al organ The Wurst ,
Blatt for one consecutive week while o p e r at i n the r at h s k e l

, ,
’
ler at the Turner fair and annually thereafter The Wurst ,

.
Blatt published o fficial proceedings of th e alley council the ,
annual reports of alley o fficers and the poetry of B arney ,
S quires tree trimmer and poet lariat

,
- -
.
O ne big event of Pretzel alley w a s the parade of the

P retzel alley press clu b escort ed b y the Pretzel alley silver ,
cornet b and wi th the mayor editors and correspondents of

, , ,
the W urst Blatt dolled in o ffi cial regalia That parade created

-
.
a sensation as it escorted Jack Johnson his white wife and

, , ,
2 14
the white man s hope t o the steamer Morning S tar for the
’
frolic of the Tri City press club -

.
S ome fine old scouts held o ffice in P retzel alley sport ,
guys like Charlie S teel O scar Raphael D oc M idd l eton Bill , , ,
H ickey P in k B illig Billy Cham b ers Rud C onrad George

, , , ,
Martin L ovin H enry A rt Ke l ly E rn i l Berg A l O H e r n D ad

’ ' ’
French D oc Rab en Mannie A dler Charlie Cas w

, , , , ,
, ell L ee
, , ,
D augherty O tt P aulsen P ete Petersen S chiller Rice Ch arlie

, , , ,
Bec k er H ans S c h r aam Billy H arrison Max Ru b en H arry

, , , ,
S p encer P hil D aum A lec k Ro b erts Fred Brooks Re d H eeney

, , , , ,
A l Mueller Brady Thompson Tony Moore Jim Gorman

, , , ,
J ohn Ruhl Jimmy Cahill E d Carroll B en G e e r t z H arry Man

, , , ,
gan Barney O N e i l l H arry W inters George S cott John

,
’
, , ,
S orenson Geor g e D empsey Chu b Thompson Billy Clancy

, , , ,
H ugo Moeller Jack M ar i n an Butter Kuehl A l Goldschmidt

, , , ,
Pink M einert C harlie H ild Billy N oth Frank S ammons and

, , , ,
D oc S t o e c k s .
When the city council changed Pretzel alley to L ibrary

street that thoroug h f are began to Slip and when the moisture
, ,
exch anges at the east and west end closed Pretzel alley ,
turned up its toes l e av i n nothin behind b ut memories of the

,
’ ’
g o o d old days .
2 15
Co m e B ack to P re t ze l A ll e y .
N iseo Co me B a ck to E rn i
”
me r d w h a h r l nd
ge it F t e a .
ln P r z l A ll y H i n y S i n h l d r of h b n d
e t e e . e e te . t e ea e t e a ,
W h unch d b y h g ng v r i n f r o m f off F h rl n d
as e t e esa -
e e ar at e a ,
Th l l h i Uncl Fri z g l — b i lli on m rk or

at a s e t
'
s e t a a s so
W l f h i m w i h h i g h w d b l w h n U ncl m d h i b lo w
as e t , t t e t a e t, e e a e s .
T h n H i n y k i d h i li b r ch z
e e e m k g y B rl i n b loom
sse s e e s a t , to a e a e .
Wi h i zzl i ng d h h i gh
t s po h m r d h i Unc m m
re t e es t s ts e s ea e s
'
s a zu e .
B utGr c h n h epr z l n d gr w gr u m p y wi h h b lu
t e at t e e t e s ta e t t e es,
F o r wh n h o o k h p i h n d h p i ll d h i y l of n w
e s e t er en n a s e s e t s s t e e s
C h oru s
Co m b c k P r z l A ll y w h r o n i on b lo o m b loo m
e a to e t e e , e e ss s ,
Li m b ur g r c h fli n g e h br z i b u i ful p rfu m
eese s to t e ee e ts ea t e e .
Th r b e
'
e s pl c for i ch f c i l l h W p i V ll y
ut o ne a e s a a e n a t e a s e a e ,
h w l d y our i y ou ll n d i wh i n yo u li gh i P r z l A ll y '
5 0 o t n. a e t t n et e e .
But He i ne y
ou gh h i j n g y H th wro D r Woo d n S h o
t s a e to o a . e te ea e es
'
I ll co m b a c k
no t ld P A b e l q u i rr l j u i c to o . . to att e s e e .
l m d uc k oup for h i B r l i n n o i d g i ng j o h nn y w i
'
s t s e se, an e tt -
se .
S y li
a n— w i h h ar m y b o y 1 p i l m H o ch ! d Ka i !
, st e t t e s s e
'
e ,
!
er se
B Gr ch n un g h i m wi h h i f c — h f r d h w o uld g n i c k d
ut et e st t t s a t s e ea e e e t e
“
Y ou r l d for a uc k r
'
e !
s a te O l d por ! D u b i i h ! s e act s t st ver c t
1 lo ng k y ou for h to cu h li vta e — a hi n t at s , a e one no t s e
Wi h h l d P r z l A ll y pu h k n o c k o u for S in ”
t t e o e t e e s . a t te .
2 16
game sports that loved outdoor stu ff They hunted all over
, .
the western prairies and in the fall and spring when wild, ,
duc k s and geese w as fl y i n they a l ways had their muzzle ’
loaders greased for action .
Jim Means w as guard on the dra w

pier of the old wooden b ridge then ,
and he acted a s loo k out for the S teve

Gilman huntin clu b when the tea l ’
b lue b il l s ma l lards and m az o o k s started

, ,
fly i n Jim had a special wild duck S i g

’
-
.
nal for the S teve Gilman b oys— t wo

long and two S hort toots of the whistl e
— warnin memb ers to hop into their
’
huntin togs a s the wild poultry was

’
,
c o a s t i n down the rapids and par k in in

’ ’
the marshlands of the Wapsie and

D evil s glen
’
.
The time the steam b oat E ffi e A fton bumped into the old
'
wooden b ridge Jim Mean s kinda lost his noodle and instead
, ,
of b l o w i n the distress si gnal Jim to o ted the S teve Gilman

’
,
wild duck call and there wa s a mad ru sh of nimrods to the

-
,
Piute club rooms Pat H oran steward at that time was

.
, ,
b oldin down the dog watch and he wondered why them

’
-
,
S portsmen came rushi n in for their shootin irons Pat made ’ ’

-
.
up cheese sandwiches and too k a coupla cold bottles o ff the

ice for them hunters b efore they discovered that Jim had
pulled a boner Then the S teve Gilman b oys rushed down
.
to the river gra b bed all the S k iffs in si ght and hurried to
, ,
rescue the passengers and crew of the E ffie A fton .
2 18
Bi lli ard s an d D ru m Corp s .
L annie M c A ff e e
trained billiard
bal l s and he cou l d almost make em
,
’
ta lk L annie would call a S hot Carom

.
“
, ,
in the hat ”
and the cue b all would
,
glance o ff the o b j ect ball and jump into

his hat on a chair near the ta b le to com
p l e t e the carom H is tric k dog
”
. Graff , ,
would s i t on a chair h o l d i n a billiard ’
ball o n his nose and L annie would call

,
his S hot Carom on the dog

“
,
”
Kinda , .
tic k lish for the dog but he enj oyed it , .
L annie could play fan c y mas s e and

draw Shots an d wa s a s clever at finger
,
billiards as old Y ank A d am s O ne evenin L annie hun g up a

.
’
worl d s record p un c h i n out over fifteen hundred caroms at

’
,
’
S traight billiards at Billy Ball s saloon on east Third street

’
.
H enry A s c h e r m an could whistle

li k e a c al l e y o p e with his fingers and ,
little P ac k e y P helan bought a snare

drum on t h e installment plan at Jo b ,
’
Ross s second hand store that drum
-
,
b avin done service in the Mexican war

’
.
A fter P ac k e y got s o s he could knoc k

’
o ff the single drag and the dou b le drag

- -
,
him and H enry organized the original

S cott county drum corps and them two ,
kids marched at the head of the torch

light p e r c e s s i o n s in the Tilden and
H endrick parades In them days s o me
.
fol k s got the idea that the vote of New Y ork state elected
Grover b ut us old timers k new it w a s the martial music of
,
P ac k e y and H enry that done the trick .
2 19
J O!! T URN E R.
M u
'
s m av L UP P Y
'S UNI O N B A ND . C A M E RO N , l ’ l ' mp iw
Q
J OHN TURNER, S
W ?
'
\ or ! in
222
own motion carried u n an i m u s l y Then Ignatz would o b ey .
the inst r uctions of the p r e s e c t r e as .
E ven if them latter day b o bb y b oys couldn t gargle their

- -
’
“ ’
r s
”
li k e H arry L auder and S ing a b oot a braw bricht m o on
“
licht nicht a richt when H ay D onald got his pipes primed

,
’ ”
,
with prim e scotch and led the song service they could larrup
the chorus of D o k t a r E isen b art in S cott county sc otch when
“ ”
singin :
’
l h b in d
e D kt E i e nb r t
e r o ar s a
Vi ll y Vi ll y i m b oo m !
,
e e v c tu
n ch m i n r A
,
Ku h i r d i L u
’
e e t a e e rt,
Vi ll y Vi ll y i m b m !
e e v c tu o o
L hm n g h n
,
K nn m c h n d
_
'
a a di e ass e a e e
B li n d n w i d r h n
,
'
U d d n di ass e e e e se
Vi ll y V i ll y i m b oo m !
,
e , e v c tu
Vi o i y l Vi o i y l
e t -
r -
a e t -
r -
a
Vi ll y V i ll y i d h i
e , ! e v c u e ra s s a
Vi o i ! Vi o i y l
e t -
r -
ay e t -
r -
a
Vi ll y Vi ll y i m b oo m !
e , e v c tu
D idn t
’
ma k e any di ff erence how hard the
B urns club
committee worked when p u t t i n on their membership drives
,
’
,
they couldn t land any mem b ers from Corkhill G o o s e h o l l o w

’
, ,
Flatiron square Rogertown ,or the P atch

,
.
2 23
2 24
Barnyard go l f shi n ny and duck o n davy were t h e leadin

, ,
- -
’
games of the o l d days and them s ports h as com e b ac k again

,
strong . O f course the good old game of s kat has b een l oo k ed

after b y G u s S t u e b e n Fred Kun k el O swald S chmidt C l aus
, , ,
K uehl O tto S chrumm P ete B endixen H erman O e t z m an n

, , , ,
Chris B ehrens D ic k M i t t l e b u s c h e r E rnst O tto Wa l ter

, ,
~
,
.
S chmidt H enry Von Maur L eopold S iemon E d Berger

, , , ,
Fran k M ue ll er E d L i s c h e r and other S k at b u g s that would

, ,
rather p l ay s k at th a n e at fried sprin g chic k en .
The Night O w l c l u b made regular monthly trips to

P ro b s tei an d L itt l e s Grove to ho l d pinochle parties under
’
t h e direction of K ing H enry S chroeder P ompey P eter s en .

,
P athy Nagel C ooney Kohrs Fe p p o R o d d e w i g Ross Nag l e

, , , ,
and P au l S everin were the charter members of that clu b .
The L auter b ach clu b had a fine sum mer c amp down at
Billy P etersen s is l and and H ugo Vollstedt Bi ll y M ae h r a n d
’
, , ,
Fr an k C ol s o n l oo k ed after the comfort of v i s i t i n tourists ’
T h e Ideal clu b camped at M c M a n u S s island and visitors

’
were giv e n the glad hand day or night b y O sc ar S c h u u p , , ,
Charlie Klein O tto Gruenwald and Billy Koch

, , .
Then there w as famous old S la b hall up on Tenth street ,
b etween Farnam and L e Cl ai r e a great clu b of the old days , .
Jim Coulter w as b and instructor at S la b h a l l and he starte d ,
the L ight Guard b and in the tootin game L e w and Geor g e ,

’
.
Mallette Jim L eonard Tom Flynn P i g i r o n Jones Fran k

, , , ,
Foster Billy Frazer Jim Gorman O wen Murray Buck L ay

, , , ,
den Gil A rnould P at S tap l eton J ac k H i g gins Jim R o ch e

, , , , ,
P at H an l ey Bil l y Gordon an d a l ota oth e r young b irds got

, ,
their musica l ed u c ation in t h e conservatory departm e nt o f

S lab hall .
2 26
Curb s t one M e rry m ake r s .
M e bb e you young fellers n o w d ay s ’
thin k you re b avin lotsa f un sport b ut ’ ’

, ,
it ain t in it compared with the o l d ’
days when the boys played A ll i n ,

“
-
,
“
Tic k tac k ” “
Bar bar e e ” “
I spy and
-
,
- -
,
-
,
other games The old gangs never .
’
thought of goin to dancin school to ’
-
learn dancin a s they too k lessons on ’
street corners and stepped to the music

of the mouthorgan or j ewsharp .
The Brady street gang held danc

’
i n school se s sions at the corner of
-
Fourth alongside the sa l t b arrels at H urto s grocery store

,
’
Granger VJ al l ac e and h i s mouthorgan b ein the orchestra ’

.
W hen them youngsters got s o s they cou l d waltz schottische ’
, ,
and pol k a and go through quadrille s without a S kip they

, ,
tried out their wor k at the Mayday dance and children s b all ’
at Turner hall on the Monday after b ird shootin day at

,
-
’
S chuetzen .
The G o o s e h o l l o w gang usta ta k e dancin lessons at the ’
corner of E ighth and H arrison near N o t h s b rewery and som e ,

’
mighty fine dancers graduated from G o o s e h o l l o w dancin ’
school There w as D andy D evine P ete S haughnessy Jim

.
, ,
D evlin Benny S t u e h m e r Billy Carroll Jim S weeney H ugo

, , , ,
Moeller J o b O B r i e n L ew P ic k ens Buc k Timothy S han l ey

,
’
, , ,
M c P ar t l an d Cooney Raphael Jimmy Gannon Poker D evine

, , , ,
H einey P aulsen Jimmy S tretch Billy S hine D utch S t ue h m e r

, , , ,
T e e s o n Carroll Tom B oyd Choo k y K u p h al D in H arrigan

, , , ,
H enry Frahm O wen S weeney H oo sier O s b orn H oy S t ue h

, , ,
mer S ti ffy Brophy Jim H oughton Frank P illion D uckfoot

, , , ,
M c Far l an d and a lota other young b loods that learned to

,
waltz on their toes without t o u c h i n their heels while Bogus

,
’
,
M c G e e played A fter the Ball on the mouthor g an

”
.
The S lough gang down in the west end had the b est
, ,
outdoor dancin school in the burg though Them lads had

’
, .
22 7
S co Cou n y Ki d
tt t ney fo o t Club .
Ch a rl ie S eem ann, H ugo Vo ll s te d t, E lll R o as t e r
22 8
The gals dancin in the quadrille that evenin were Minnis

’ ’
M c G r a t h S coop Cottre ll Toad Keating Ni b s Co ll ins Bum

, , , ,
M c M a h o n Chip Bryson D oshen M c G r at h Joe S t e a d l e y

,
'
, , ,
V o n k o L ynch and S heeney P owers and a ll them b irds had

‘
, ,
hand k erchiefs tied to their arms e x c e p t i n Chip Bryson who ’
w a s w e ar i n h i s red fl an n i n unders h irt h av i n b een wor k i n

’ ’ ’
’
overtime at the foundry that evenin The guys that danced .
were H einey S ievers B y b e r Garvey Bil l y L avery Buer Mc

, , ,
Grath Jimmy O B r i e n Tug L ynch J im Cooney Zu l o H augh

,
’
, , , ,
and D ic k Malone and they s ur e done some fancy s t e p p i n

,
’
.
Big T o m and L ittle T o m Garvey acted as floor manager s to ,
s e e that everything moved right and when they ho ll ered Al l

“
,
s et,
P at Walsh gave the high—sign to D utch K l auer and th e n ,
P a t S e n t them S lou g h
“ ”
called out First four right and left !
,
b oys through their paces at top sp e ed on a ll three ch an g es

of the quadri l le and then h e done t h e c allin for the V irgi n ia
,
’
reel b efore go i n home

“
’
.
Them S lough j a k es cer t ain l y did hit it u p th at ev e ni n

S p o rt and wh e n the orchestra played H ome S w e e t H o m e
,
“
, ,
for the last dan c e t h ey h a d t a play s i x e ncore s b ef o re th e m

,
young b uc k os wou l d let em p u t aw a y th e ir instrum e nts

’
.
A nd th at s h o w it came a b out th at t h e b oy s of the Sl ou g h

’
g ang c o pped a ll t h e p r izes for w a l t z i n at t h e s o ci a l clu b d an ce s ’
that w a s held in the S toc k y a r d s an d H e i n e y h al l in t h e o l d

b efore the s himmy s h ak e r s b ro k e l o o s e -
.
2 30
T h e H ap p y E n d ing .
m o st fol k s i s k een for h a ppy endin ho k e

EI N
’
as
’
,
S port they won t stand for a l e a d p i p e b lowo ff

,
’
.
S o not h av i n a ch ance to pull weddin b e l l soft

,
’ ’
-
stu ff — outside of f r am i n the cruel and inhuman ’
against Genera l H oust o n or sumpi u — j ust imagine , .
A balmy O cto b er evenin fi ft y years a g o — the old Brady ’
street g an g sittin o n t h e b oard wa lk 1 n front of L illis S grocery

’ ’
d anglin their feet in the sla b stone gutter The harvest moon
’
.
rises S lowly ove r t h e map l es near W orley s livery b arn shim

' ’
merin i t s S ilvery rays in the crisp autumn air

’
.
O ld Murt Burns gives the h i gh s i gn with his red lantern

to Connie O B r i e n on ingine seventy two and throws the
’
-
,
swit c h to give the right o f way to the Kil k enny crew That - -
.
j a n g l i n b ell you hear comin up the street sport i s on the

’ ’
, ,
hoss that H enry S c h n i t g e r i s d r i v i n on h i s bo b tail street car ’

.
John H aley and P hi l Nagle are arguin politics wi th Jo b ’
Ross and A ndy Butler in front of D ave H unter s meat market ’

.
O ld A unt L ucy and Granny Conyer toddle slowly along the

street l a u g h i n and e n j o y i n theirselves after a hard day s
,
’ ’
,
’
wor k at washin and i r o n i n ’ ’

.
But listen sport ! H e a r that t i n k l i n guitar and the

,
’
S ingin comin up the street ? That s the old quartet—Jim

’
,
’ ’
D ermody Tom B i d d i s o n Joe Carroll and Tommy Mac k

, , ,
r e t urn i n in the open landau with D oc Worley after sere

’
,
nadin down at J o hnny M c G u i n n e s s s

’ ’
.
A nd S ee that mo b of kids f o l l y i n em ! ’ ’
A nd lo o k —there s Max O chs an d L awrie the Coon ’
comin acr o s s the street from S tingy Bl ack s ice cream par
’ ’
lor If o l d Til d o n t b ust in to S how h i s authority they ll b e

.
’
, ,
’
s u m p i n doin purty soon

’
.
Who s that h o l e r i
l
’
n eh ?
O h th at s young S tony John ’
, ,
’
ston callin to D oc Worley astin him won t he sing the O ld

,
’ “
,
’ ’
S ong and D oc ho l lers b ack and says sure thing

,
”
.
Now S port we ll hear real melody when D oc gets

, ,
’
through p l u n k i n the prelude and rollin the b ass runs

’ ’
.
23 1
L i sten ! voice H e s S ingin the

’
T hat s Jim D e r m o d y ’
s .
’ ’
first verse of the O ld S ong ”

, and now comes the
chorus :
J u s t a s o ng a t t wi li gh t,
Wh e n th e l i gh ts are low
N o w— Tom B id d is o n and Tommy Mac k j oin in with
An d th e fli c k e r i n
'
s had ow s
S of t l y co m e an d go
That sweet voiced tenor on the high notes sport

-
, , is
l itt le Joe Carro l l , and now they re a ll singin ’ ’
T h ou gh h h r b w r y t e ea t e ea
d lo ng
,
S d h d y a t e a an
S ll wi l i gh
,
m
ti to e a t t t,
Co m lov l d o ng
'
es e s o s
Now — listen to D o c W orley Max O chs .

, , and L awri e
the coon with h i s de e p cel l ar b ass j oinin in
,
-
,
’
, as they s l ow
d o wn an d put f e e l i n int o the last l ine

’
o
C m e s— lov '
e s — old -
s w ee t — s o ng .
H ear the app l ause of that b ig crowd s p ort ! Kinya ,
b eat it ! S ay b oy—me bb e old S aint P eter h a s b etter S ingers

,
in th at choir of his n w ai t i n to greet tired o l d timers when

’
,
’
the last call comes b ut you can t make them b irds b e l ieve
,
’
there s any niftier harm onizers inside the pearly gates until
’
Ga b riel b l o ws h i s trumpet and says Come on b oy s ! ”

, ,
That s real old time melody sport a n d no b o d y

’
, ,
bl ame a guy after hearin the old quartet for t h r o w i n out

,
’
,
’
h i s chest and tel l in a l l the world that

’
T hem w a s the go o d o l d d ays .
23 2

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THEM WA S THE

Repri n te d fro m S ke tc hes Publ is h e d i n

C orkhill and the Patch

Rollicking Times at Wapsie S hindigs '

W hen the E clipse Threw a S care

The Tale of the S cott C oun ty A pple

E ncore Music and E lks - . f

The E xile of Johnny Ro b bins

Mayors of D avenport in the Good O ld D ays

A Fine S tring of Carp

D andies of the S eventies

Toot ! Toot ! The S eventy Two -

A ll D olled for E aster S unday S tyle Parade

Grum b lers Camp on S mith s Island ’

L ittle M int on Ea st Third S treet

When Co b and P k y Were Chums

D avenport s First H uman F l y

Bert L esli e and S teve H ogan

The S teamer D onahue

N O RD I N A R Y P E RS O N ,diverging from routine ,

s n i i f s an i mpulse to conﬁ de the reason therefor

to ease deviou s doub ts and to invi t e du b ious

a ﬂiv has b een alibied on a salesman s suggesti o n that the ’

air is extremely desira b le for a ro b ust neurotic .

O wney G e e gan of intermittent nerves diagnosed h i s

temperamental ailment as abd o m inal easiest appeased by ,

stimulant : the satisfactory ali b i To augment h i s .

discomfort O wney annexed a wife who tipped the beam at

The short skirt epidemic raged— O wney developing

op p o sition H is two tener hitting her stride and scenting

opposition was a victim o f circumstances A n attack of ﬂu

four years previously was the caus e of falling hair— Mrs

O wney observed one morning— and after visitin g a beauty

b ob b ed hair The cleaner delivered her best skirt that morn

ing also and O w n e y s woman discovered a shrinkage which

elevated that garment stylishly a b ove her s h o e t o p s .

The afternoon w a s devoted to explaining voluminously to , ,

incredulous neighbors the how com e of the twin alibi : short - -

skirt and bobbed hair That evening O wney t oo k one ﬂash

at h i s b u xom b etter half -

tory ali b i restrai nin g homicidal urge O n taking the .

b u mps the following S unday O w n e y s ﬂiv wa s loaded with

alibis—the satisfactory one and the re ar seat threesome -

Frank Gordon sports editor solicited a contribution for

Bob Feeney s H o m a d e H ooch column for the Christmas

issue of the D emocrat to recall old days down the line

H ugh H arrison city editor inspected t h at c o n t r i b ut i o n and

urged i t s expansion with cartoons by Cep for the N ew

Y ear s hooch resume Vince D organ recalled so m e Cork

of old time river camps A dolph .

Petersen re g istered old T u rner hall

bub b led reminiscently and so did ,

R al ph C ram Fran k Throop sa id

gested a j azz vol ume for historical

A pproaching the half century

bac k ward t o observe that time has

smoothed many rough places ; that

past T r iﬂi n g episod es of y o uthful

days take on retro sp ec tive charm as the years glide along .

W ebster s diction ary the city directory newspaper sport

expressi o ns pirated— resulting in a plagiarized potpo urri for

In the old days clothes were the handwor k of the goo d

Frequently clothes were bequeathed from sire to s o n an d ,