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T
O commemorate the 70th year have text books or even teachers — vate bijli-paani through costly diesel screaming and head-bobbing continued. I
of the adoption of the Constitu- it’s the duty of the citizens to send gensets and equally costly borewells helped him alight from the jeep and whis-
tion, the sarkar is planning a their kids to private schools, like the and water tankers. pered to the driver, “Get a doctor”.
nation-wide campaign aimed at one you and I go to, and which charge Boy: That’s not the end of our duties as Our guest, by now slightly less hysteri-
educating the aam janta about the fun- huge fees, which our parents are duty- citizens. As sarkari law and order cal, speaking telegraphically, dropped a
damental duties enjoined upon citi- bound to pay. isn’t always on hand, what with more bombshell, “Suitcase...not mine. Picked
zens. To this end, power point presen- Boy: Well, no one said being a citizen and more crimes being committed, up wrong one, airport. All
MILITARY MATTERS
JUST JUGGLERY tations will be made in schools to teach was cheap. specially against women, citizens documents...court-martial tomorrow...in
students as to what these duties entail. Girl: Being a citizen isn’t cheap. And have to do a double duty to ensure COLONEL K THAMMAYYA UDUPA my suitcase.” The driver quickly returned
JUG SURAIYA
Two nursery school students, a boy
and a girl, both aged 4, excitedly dis-
cussing this latest sarkari initiative.
Girl: I think it’s a very good thing the
it’s growing more and more expen-
sive. Apart from paying huge fees to
private schools, people when they fall
sick have to pay huge fees to private
their safety by living in private gated
communities, like your family and my
family do, and employing our own pri-
vate security guards.
I T was early 1980s. I was to board a flight
from Calcutta to rejoin my regiment in
the Northeast. No sooner had I checked
in at the airport than a Havildar from a
with a nursing assistant. I told them the
problem had been identified and there
was no need of any medical intervention.
But the nursing assistant wanted to ply
sarkar is doing. As the citizens of hospitals, with rat-infested sarkari Girl: And because sarkari public trans- local unit walked up to me and handed me his trade. He raised his left hand and
tomorrow, we must learn to do all the hospitals being what they are, no one port is overcrowded and unsafe for pas- a note. Before reading it, I remembered ordered, “How many fingers are these?”
duties that the sarkar wants us to do. wants to go to them if they can help it. sengers, particularly women passen- “Expect the unexpected”, one of the oft Before the bewildered gentleman could
Boy: That’s right. And the list of duties Boy: And our duties as citizens don’t gers, it’s the duty of citizens to get repeated maxims from our pre-commis- react, he said, “No, just walk from here to
that the sarkar expects us to do is very end with private schools and hospi- themselves their own private transport sion training days. “Maybe due to some there as straight as you can.” I had to cut
long, which seems to keep growing tals. It’s also the duty of the citizens by way of cars, SUVs, or two-wheelers. realignment of the stars somewhere, my him off rather rudely.
longer and longer. to arrange their own bijli-paani, Boy: Which brings us to another duty leave has been extended by another 15 I called up my adjutant as well as the
Girl: I know what you mean. As fewer because sarkari bijli-paani can’t be that citizens must do. Thanks to all days,” I thought. I went through the note officer who was waiting for the expert
and fewer parents want to relied on, what with power break- those private cars, SUVs, and two- eagerly, only to realise that I was being about the unexpected turn of events. I
send their children to downs and water shortages. wheelers, and their emissions, there is assigned a duty even before my leave was informed the adjutant that we would visit
sarkari schools — Girl: I know. So it’s our duty as so much pollution that in order to to end. It was a message from our adju- the airlines’ city office. In those days, the
which often don’t citizens to arrange our own pri- breathe, citizens have to perform the tant. A forensic expert, required as a wit- airlines staff would return to their city
duty of buying face masks and home ness in an ongoing court-martial, would office from the airport after the departure
air purifiers. And who knows, the time be travelling in the same flight. And, after of the Calcutta flight. So it was pointless
may come when it becomes the duty landing, I was to help him reach the tran- to travel all the way back there. The adju-
of citizens to equip themselves with sit camp 65 km away. The Havildar left tant assured me that he would contact
their own private oxygen tanks to after introducing me to the forensic them and coordinate.
avoid pollution. expert. We sat down and even before I It was an hour’s drive to the city. I was
Girl: Wow. The list of the duties citizens could make any small talk with him, he keeping my fingers crossed. Our guest was
must do, because of the duties the sarkar had dozed off. In the aircraft he was seat- making himself conspicuous by his steady
can’t or doesn’t do, seems endless. ed right behind me and I could hear him snoring. The story did not take any further
Boy: It is endless. Because on top of all snoring throughout the flight. unexpected turns. The owner of the suit-
the other duties they have, citizens I met him again after we had landed. We case our guest had picked up had informed
have the duty to repeatedly vote for collected our luggage and were off in the the airlines staff that his suitcase was miss-
sarkars which, all these years after jeep my unit had sent for me. My attempts ing and a similar looking one was lying
Independence, still expect citizens to to have a conversation with him again unclaimed. The airlines staff, before lock-
do for themselves what the sarkar came to nought as he promptly dozed off ing up and returning to the city office, had
can’t do for them. as soon as the vehicle started moving. promised to sort out the matter. It was just
Girl: I can hardly wait for the On reaching the transit camp, I gently past midnight when I handed over the
sarkar to teach us what more nudged him. He woke up with a start, expert, with his own suitcase, to the con-
duties citizens can do. rubbed his eyes and let out a bloodcur- cerned officer at the transit camp.
Boy: Don’t worry. I bet the dling scream. His eyes were locked on to As per the calendar it was the day I
sarkar is even now work- his suitcase. Expecting the unexpected, I was to rejoin the duty. What an unex-
ing on figuring out what asked him, “Is there a cobra lurking pected manner it was for my leave to
extra duties it can find for us to there?” He screamed even more, nodding end! Or, was it an unexpected way of
do. That’s the one duty it does do… his head in a manner which was neither getting back on duty?
ILLUSTRATION: SANDEEP JHOSHI