Transformation

Mastery Notes
Table of Contents
Transformation Mastery Notes .............................................................................................. 1
1. introduction ...................................................................................................................... 3
2. How to go through program ............................................................................................... 5
Part 1: AWARENESS ............................................................................................................... 5
3. part 1 - Awareness - Get to the cause ................................................................................. 6
4. - Awareness - scarcity vs abundance .................................................................................. 8
5. Awareness: The goal ........................................................................................................ 10
6. Awareness - the journey .................................................................................................. 12
7: Juliens story..................................................................................................................... 13
8: Awareness- Committing to abundance ............................................................................. 14
Part 2: PROOF...................................................................................................................... 15
9: How to let go ................................................................................................................... 15
10. Step 1: be aware of what you want to let go of .............................................................. 16
11. Step 2: proof - allow yourself to experience it fully ......................................................... 18
12: Proof - step 3- let it come up and let it out .............................................................................. 19
STAGE 3: PERMANANCE ...................................................................................................... 20
14. part 3; Subconscious Mind ............................................................................................. 20
15. Social conditioning ......................................................................................................... 22
16. part 3 - Pandora’s box .................................................................................................... 25
17. part 3 - the process ........................................................................................................ 27
18 - part 3; opening Pandora’s box....................................................................................... 29
19: Identify the subconscious............................................................................................... 31
10: how to let go of the subconscious mind ......................................................................... 34
1. introduction
How does it feel being me? What’s it like?
 give a real answer, not just the ‘I’m fine’

Rate it objectively out of ten how I feel if someone else was experiencing being me
 4.5 out of 10
 ‘not bad’
 feel worthless, small, weak, fearful, failure, penniless, useless,

Just stand still and do nothing and you’ll hear the shitty hum of negativity
 leads to life of coping, escaping, distraction
 since we have this, we use our energy to cope with it and it gets worse and worse

if we came from a 10/10 abundance, we can focus our energy on exploding

 how many people have a truly focused and aware experience of life, life in the
pupils

We do all the self help, travel, girls, meditation, etc

 trying to fix this baseline of 3-4/10
 but it all has beneath it, the baseline 3-4/10

I thought it would fix it, but underneath it doesn’t change it

 I have a business, travel, some girls, better health..
 but it never changes the real baseline

Work, hustle, productivity, focus, business, travel, girls, money, success

 its not the answer - it doesn’t change the baseline

So we have to change the baseline - deep work!

Whatever I’m trying to achieve, it always leads to trying to achieve improving my
baseline. We want to be 10/10

Transformation mastery breaks us out of this futile cycle of coping and doing and trying
to get all this stuff to change the baseline, and instead truly transforming to change the
baseline. Changing it gives us an entirely new experience of the world

Current mindset is ‘make it through the day’ - hope time will fly by, get torrented movies,
eat for sensory pleasure, escaping life, dreading life, looking forward to sleeping

With this program I will get to a point where I don’t need to spike my baseline, I’ll finally
be in control, upward spiral coming from a 10/10 abundance

I’ll gain core confidence, I’ll know what i want, i’ll come from inspiration, not desperation,
love myself, not escaping myself, stop being addicted to approval and validation, stop
needing to fill the void

I’ll feel deserving! - stop self sabotaging

2. How to go through program
it’s experiential, not about knowledge. I must follow the exercise and do the work, not
collect knowledge.

We think that more knowledge gets us closer to a 10/10 - same as chasing money or
fame or girls

This is a journey, guiding me from scarcity and abundance. Let it guide me.

Part 1: awareness
Gives an understanding

Part 2: proof
Gives experiential change

Part 3: permanence
Goes deeper into subsconciouss

Part 1: AWARENESS
3. part 1 - Awareness - Get to the cause
Paradigms: We are unaware of them, but they shape our world
 we think we see things as they are
 we don’t see the world as it is, but as we are conditioned to see it we think we are
objective - but we are wearing glasses that we are given when we are younge
 we are so conditioned we don’t even know we are conditioned

We almost never question how accurate our paradigms are

Two opposing paradigms in duality
1/10 10/10
unhappiness happiness
scarcity abundance
incomplete complete
not enough enough
ego self
inauthentic authentic

Due to the way that we are conditioned, we assume scarcity

 Test: if your top trying to do stuff and be successful, where do we naturally go to,
scarcity or abundance
 its the reason nothing sticks

We are seeking abundance within the scarcity paradigm

Anything I do to ‘improve’ assumes the lower paradigm

We have to DROP the old paradigm

Even hustle/motivation implies the default that I’m a lazy asshole that doesn’t work and
is unmotivated to start with.

It’s like being in London, using a map of Paris. No matter how much I work, be positive,
motivated, etc. - it won’t work because it’s the wrong map

If I assume I’m not motivated naturally, then anything I do to fix it will actually reinforce it

But it’s hard to drop it, because we get attached, we’ve invested SO much energy into it
if we go long enough in this way, we start to find evidence to prove our lower paradigm,
and we ignore the evidence of being or coming from a higher paradigm.

We keep finding other reasons to be pissed off or mad, even if the original reason is
stupid and we know it. We find other reasons to be mad.
I have to rethink it. Must shift paradigms completely. It’s an inside out approach, not
trying to fix the external - money, love etc.

Our internal models create our outside world

Cultivate abundance and I’ll see it everywhere - it will become a reinforcing self-fulfilling
prophecy

Let go of the external, focus on the inner approach

Focus on the cause, which is my baseline.

4. - Awareness - scarcity vs abundance
Desperation = running away from 3/10
 desire, thirst, need
 (the mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation)
 Carrot and stick, punishment and reward
 if I had all the money, i wouldn’t matter

Inspiration = coming from a 10/10

 you don’t have to ‘need/crave’ the girl/money/health -
 If I let go of the need, I’ll find that I’m naturally inspired anyway

it’s not the thing/action, but where its coming from

 Am I coming/acting from inspiration or desperation?
 it should happen just because

When it’s from inspiration, it becomes effortless, energising

When it’s from desperation, its effort, and heavy and tough

Live example:
When booed on stage (desperation) - clients feel heavy, tough, challenged
When cheered on stage (inspiration)- clients are energised, pumped up, alive

Start catching my mental assumptions

 ‘oh shit if i approach she will reject me unless…. ‘
 Wait, why is the default rejection. Why isn’t the default her liking me?

Ask myself when go through life, is this coming from a dark heavy place of desperation,
fighting the boos of my mind,
OR
Is it coming from inspiring place, cheering, glory, abundance, love, having fun, being
amazing.

Same person - coming from a different place!

We think effort is good, but it’s not a virtue, the less effort it takes, the more powerful it
is.

Like yelling: We think more effort is helpful, actually less effort is easier and helpful to be
louder

if you think your stifled and you force it out, its less connected to people and it feels
fake.

You hustle way more when it comes from abundance, because it’s easier and less effort
effortless doesn’t mean not doing anything, it just means it shouldn’t feel like work.
Same amount of work, different experience - less draining

Coming from abundance, it stops becoming ‘I need to’ and it starts being natural

We live a life of addiction, to work, self help, girls, etc. - we constantly try to fill our time
with stuff - always running away from ourselves
 Movies, youtube, facebook, biting/picking, checking phone, surfing, downloading
books, courses, watching courses

Desperation is the cause of all addictions

When you just focus on giving, sharing, expanding - it comes alive
 we stop self sabotaging
But if we are coming from desperation, we become hooked, and then we can succeed,
we self sabotage to keep our addiction to desperation

I don’t need a strong desire, just a strong intention

 intention of abundance and living from inspiration

Live a life of total non-resistance, I welcome it all, I welcome all emotions,

circumstances, they all run their course
 I still get negative emotions, but I don’t suffer from them
 Still ups and downs of life, but effect you differently

Coming from inspiration, I enjoy the process, I’m not rushing, I’m not happy when it’s
done, I’m happy doing, I’m expanding, growing and engaging, but it’s from inspiration
not coming from desperation

BASICLY, if you are trying to GET something to stop feeling scarcity,

then I’m still in scarcity
5. Awareness: The goal
What truly is abundance. I.E. oneness, divine, enlightenment

You can’t do anything to ‘deserve it’,

Abundance can’t be deserved

and can’t depend on anything
If I need something to deserve it or it depends on something, it stops being abundance.

Abundance can’t be achieved, because if its achieved, I would assume it can only be
achieved if I meet the same requirements again. Which puts me into scarcity.

If you need something to not fall into scarcity, I’m still in scarcity.

if I need to have or do something to get abundance, I’ll never fully feel abundance,
because I’m not starting with abundance.

The only way to get to abundance, is to start with abundance.

Trying to achieve it, reinforces that I’m not it.

It’s not something I feel, think or do, it’s not an emotional because all those come and
go, and abundance can’t depend on any of those.

It’s a STATE - it comes before all of this

It’s something that already is.

It’s our natural state, that’s why we are trying to achieve it, but we are living in the video
game instead of realising we are the player

Abundance can’t be deserved, because It’s already my natural state

Abundance can’t depend on anything, because it comes before everything

People think having or doing (knowledge, girls, money, fun, travel, peace of mind, love,
etc.) – that’s when I have abundance
It’s counter intuitive because we hear ‘be grateful, do this, do that, write a journal, etc.’

We assume that as we ‘develop’ ‘do’ ‘have’ that’s how we get closer to abundance. But
that’s untrue, that’s just assuming scarcity

Trying to reach abundance in the field of scarcity is

 impossible. It’s a different paradigm
Everything is in duality
 Every emotion, thing, up, down, , day night, happy sad, born die
 Nothing is permanent
 This is why abundance can’t depend on anything, because it’s temporary and
always has an opposite

You can’t have the good without the bad

If you seek approval, it hurts when you don’t get it, if you get approval, it hurts to be
afraid to lose it, if you lose it, it hurts

You can’t escape duality either. You aren’t trying to quit the game, you are just
becoming the player and coming from a different place. Inside you are always a 10/10,
no matter what happens or doesn’t happen - you enjoy the thing, but don’t need or
depend on it - our experience stops being situational

Recognise the dual nature, and nothing is permanent

 so I stop chasing phantoms the rest of my life -
 I will not attain or fulfil abundance by getting something or some action -
 We are all stubborn - but realise this truth
 give up on trying to achieve abundance through having or doing

It’s not having, or doing - it MUST become BEING - just because, it’s my default.
It can’t be acquired or gained, it’s not a result, there are no requirements - except
required that I must realise that I already have it

I have to drop scarcity and the assumptions they are based on

Don’t try to verbalise it or put it into words. It’s preverbal, as soon as I put it into words, it
stops being abundance

Nothing has to fit into a logical map, accept that its unexplainable
 life is in the grey, its not the black and white
6. Awareness - the journey
This is a journey not of adding, but REMOVING

Removing is what leads to true permanent transformation

Since we must start with abundance, the journey is to remove the false assumption of
scarcity that we’ve bought into and been reinforced for so long
 letting go of the entire paradigm of scarcity
 letting go of the ego,
 beliefs, conditioning, thoughts, emotions, chasing, desires,
 letting go of anything that’s mental
 letting go of knowledge and understanding

Dethatch from thoughts, mind

 abundance comes before the mind or emotions
 The goal is a state, not an emotion
 The goal isn’t to feel good or be happy, i have to let go of that
 I have to let go of negative emotions and also positive emotions
 Let go of all duality

Pleasure, what we call feeling happy, it actually just an escape from feeling ‘not’ happy
 Pleasure is just an escape from pain
 The journey is letting go of all pleasure or pain

We are not used to this. We are used to ‘improving’ the paradigm we are in, rather than
letting it go

It’s simple, but it’s not easy!

I’m still taking action, and going through experiences, but its knowing that I’m already
there.

It’s a journey of removing and realising, not accumulating

and gathering
7: Juliens story
Inspired to have my own best interest. Be inspired to find my passion, don’t find it
because I need to

 step 1: optimise
 step 2: drop it

Must build courage and presence to drop it. I need courage to accept that it didn’t work
and to shift paradigms

Once I get this, it removes a lot of contradictions

The tools and advice are different depending on the paradigms, hence the
contradictions.

i.e. to ‘step up’

in paradigm 1: its fuck it, I’m miserable, I have to run away from this
in paradigm 2 (same mindset keeps me down) I step up naturally by being

There are different tools for different steps along the way
8: Awareness- Committing to abundance
I should experience resistance because I’m hearing that everything I’m doing and
learning to get better and get what I want, is wrong

I’m hearing that I have to drop everything I’m doing and I just have to trust that
inspiration will kick in

The concept that there is nothing I need to actually do, this should feel like a personal
attack - on my self development
 We are so stubborn, we don’t want to let go
 We have a lifetime of conditioning and scarcity, its almost impossible to drop it

I have to completely fall into nothingness and let it all go. I will experience total
resistance

Be honest with myself, acknowledge this. Acknowledge that what I’m doing doesn’t
work, I’m always hitting a ceiling
 how many more years will I be desperately chasing phantoms
 I have to sit down and tell myself its enough
 I have enough experience, validation, proof and experiences that this doesn’t work
 don’t rationalise that MORE is the answer, it’s not, be honest with myself
 the more i have, the more compulsive it becomes
 ask myself what guilty pleasure i have
 being a victim is a guilty pleasure

I must be open to changing, to doing sometime differently

 everything will suck me back into it
 society will suck me back
 industry is based on scarcity
 biggest leaders, drugs, alcohol, tobacco, oil
 its all escaping
 every commercial ‘your not enough, you suck, you need this’

I must go against the grain

 I don’t need to give up the thing, just where its coming from
 i don’t have to sacrifice anything, this is what’s on the inside
 it’s the place that its coming from that needs to improve

Changing the foundation changes everything on the foundation

Part 2: PROOF
9: How to let go
Of thoughts, emotions, conditioning, desires, etc.

Use a guided release meditation

It’s just a glimpse of the natural state of abundance I have
This is the proof I give myself. The more proof I get, the more I’ll do it

Letting go is a natural ability we all have, but we just don’t use it.

You can’t work harder to let get, it’s not inaction either, but it’s not doing

You can’t think your way to it, you have to let go of the mind, emotions and thoughts

There are three steps

1. Be aware of what I’m letting go of
2. Allow myself to experience it fully
3. Let it come up and let it out
10. Step 1: be aware of what you want to let go of
What I’m presently experience or what’s buried in my subconscious

We only focus on sensations, not thoughts or emotions

If you focus on thoughts, it becomes cyclical and repetitive, there is no end. Our mind
constantly makes associations. Emotions are the same, we just label them with thought
- we feel something, and label it as ‘sad’
The moment I interpret it, I am attached to it

Bring my awareness to the sensations in my body. In my gut, my skin, my body,

muscles, tingling, heart rate, body temp, breath
 these are the signals that lead to emotions and thoughts
 Sensations can be noticed in the body, they can be pinpointed

Occupy the body, feel the body

Men are told not to feel, so we push our emotions down, we think our emotions are bad,
then we feel bad about that, it’s a cycle, we get sad about being sad and society
encourages this.

Be present in the body and receive the signals its giving me. Start feeling my body
more.

We must learn how to feel again, inhabit my body fully and stop abandoning
myself
 Feeling isn’t bad, sensations are good,
 the goal isn’t to escape bad feelings, it’s not bad
 without these sensations i wouldn’t survive - they lead me in life, its valuable
information
 if I ignored pain and anxiety i wouldn’t survive

Remember, duality, feelings never last: it comes and goes

 if we resist and refuse to feel it, it persists and gets stronger
 resist anxiety and it will get stronger, just feel it and accept it fully
 they only say if they are reinforced, ignoring them is strengthening them

Until I develop this empathy with myself and feel what I feel, then I can’t feel it with
others and genuinely feel how others feel - this will destroy my relationships

If I avoid pain by resisting it, it leads to isolation, loneliness

Apathy is worse than feeling bad. I must be open to feel, I’ll have a lot of resistance to
this.
If I have resistance when letting go, then focus on the resistance itself and let that go
first.

1. start doing check ins on myself and feel my body - body scan, what’s going on
right now - what are the sensations in my body, start feeling, if I have resistance, start
feeling that and being more okay with it.
2. walk around with my shirt off - bring awareness to my body more
3. do yoga - forces you to focus on your breathing and body
4. Bring awareness down into the base of the spine and resting there

You can’t think your way to letting go. You can’t think your way to not thinking. You must
use body awareness and breath.

Never force sensations, just feel them. Don’t think, feel.

11. Step 2: proof - allow yourself to experience it fully
When I start feeling again, I will immediately want to ‘do something’ to try to let go of the
feelings
 Don’t do this - there’s nothing i need to do
 I just need to experience it fully and allow it completely
 Fully accept the sensation and allow myself to experience it
 If I try to ‘let go’ of it and ‘remove it’ then I’m labelling as bad - i can’t let go of it
 Only way to let go, is to embrace and accept - don’t get rid of it
 Don’t try to make sense of it, there nothing i have to understand first

Truly experience, observe and feel it - it will change on its own

I’m fully there experiencing the feelings fully, I’m ready to listen, I’m no longer trying to
remove the feelings, I’m not abandoning the feelings - I breath into them and be with
them fully.

A lie we tell ourselves is we have to ‘do something’ to change our feelings, this isn’t
true, we just have to feel them and allow it.

Just let them run their course, whatever that may be.
12: Proof - step 3- let it come up and let it out

Allowing the sensation to go their course and eventually disappear and fade into the
nothingness that they came from. Give them the space to leave - experience them fully
so they can leave. Visualise the feeling coming up and go out

As soon as I let it go, I’ll feel release. Like a weights been lifted
STAGE 3: PERMANANCE

14. part 3; Subconscious Mind

Most likely after releasing with the subconscious release, the subconscious took over
and things went back to how they were.

Now I’m aware, I have proof, and it’s not permanence

Letting go of what I’m presently aware of gives me proof however, the assumption of
scarcity are buried and active in our subconscious.

To get permanence, I also have to dig everything up

Subconscious is what we are not aware of
 I.e. what did I have for dinner three days ago,
- i have to think and find out to find it

Subconscious is 90%
it’s useful for survival - we couldn’t physically monitor everything then we wouldn’t be
abet to function
 subconscious takes control of physicality, heart, stomach, motor function, habits,
skills, past experiences, memories, beliefs,
 it also takes over anything that is a threat to the subconscious mind - bad
memories, traumatic upsets, blame, grudges, anger, resentment, unresolved
wounds, beliefs and assumptions about what i deserve or don’t deserve, what my
default is, any thoughts emotions that are unacceptable
 all banished in my subconscious mind

We think by banishing this stuff really far down that its gone for good, but actually it’s
still in the mind. I’m just placing it outside of my awareness
 But whatever I resist persist
 Every unconscious thought is active whether I’m aware of it or not.
 It’s also on repeat because the mind is cyclical - and the longer it goes the
stronger it becomes over time
 This is why the subconscious mind calls the shots and controls us
 this is why we go back to the way we are constantly even after proof
 This is the cause

We must dig up and let go of everything in our subconscious mind. This is why we
are self destructive - you would never constantly choose to do it, but our subconscious
takes over.
This is why it’s so hard to change. The 90% (subconscious) always wins.
  If I want to get in shape, make money, get girls - consciously we all want it, but
subconsciously we are blocked.
 THIS is the reason I’m not getting my goals done
 Because I’m not getting to the cause - I can’t bullshit my subconscious, I can’t use
willpower to overcome it

Subconsciously I don’t think i deserve to make money - I have to get to this cause and
overcome it.
 if things go too well, I self sabotage
 if I make too much money, it gets spent
 if I get too fit, I start being lazy
 if I’m getting success with girls, I stop going out
 if I get close to a goal, I give up on it

Subconscious is the biggest obstacle, it’s the cause, and I need to get to it and address
it. Easier said than done though

Again, the subconscious mind isn’t bad, I need it to survive, but the awareness of
it and tune into it and let go of it.
15. Social conditioning
Traditions, rules, guidelines and demands exist to help us live together as a society
 we accept them as truth due to the way we learn as humans
 Most information we learn through second hand experience, because we can’t test
it all out for ourselves

We filter knowledge based on

1. How certain someone is of the idea when they tell it
2. How in alignment they are with their ideas
3. How many people also buy into the ideas (their authority)
If it passes through these filters, we accept it as valid, even if it’s not

We follow these ideas without ever questioning them, and they become unquestionable
truths.
 E.G. dating - most of what we assume is completely untrue, but everyone follows it
 A big one is that our default is scarcity (unless we are blessed)
 Original false assumptions

Then everything we do reinforces that paradigm and we become deeper entrenched

Because we all accept these unquestionable truths, they become stronger and stronger
over time
 Most of my beliefs and assumptions come from childhood
 Parents and teachers have alot of authority, and we accept what they say

parents fight:
Relationships, love = drama

Parents poor:
money - I don’t deserve it

Beliefs about what i deserve in life come from childhood

 Go to school and get bullied = I’m not a popular kid

These beliefs become more and more reinforced over time

 This is social conditioning - it creates our map of the world
 Also we are rewarded when we are good and punished when we are bad
 Worst punishment is parents withdrawing affection from me, by giving the
impression I’m no longer loved
 Assume love and affection is gone if i do something ‘wrong’

We are conditioned to believe we are not good enough to be loved just for
ourselves, but only if we do the ‘right’ things. These ‘right’ things are the specific
beliefs and conditioning we are given.
This also implies that my default is scarcity
I’m raised thinking I’m only loved conditionally

Don’t blame my parents, they do actually love me unconditionally but they don’t know
how to show it.

This is the beginning of the endless chase, money, girls, success, improvement, growth,
happiness, love, fun, etc.
 We are just trying to attain unconditional love.
 Belief is ‘if I do this, I’ll get it’. Assumes scarcity.

When we have love withdrawn it feels like death, because we depend on family for food,
shelter, survival. Withdrawing love is withdrawing survival.
 it’s life or death - they send me to my room, they don’t love me, they will abandon
me, and I’ll die.
 So my survival becomes dependant on me being ‘good’
 Survival depends on following these guidelines

This is why we banish feelings and emotions and thoughts into our subconscious -
saying ‘it’s not me’
Leads to repression and suppression
 repression is where we consciously shove it deep down
 suppression is where we don’t even remember, it just happens

We do it to conform, survive, live up to conditioning. We split up everything into

acceptable or unacceptable

e.g. liking a girl, if its shamed, we think its bad, and we decide to never show that we
like a girl again. 20 years later I want to open, and I have anxiety about it - I just want to
survive, so I banish these thoughts

This is the birth of the EGO - everything that’s acceptable and allowed I identify as
myself. Anything I’ve shoved into my subconscious is NOT me. I don’t identify with it

Ego = Effort
It’s a constant struggle to act through my ego only
I constantly worry if things I will say are acceptable - if not, I suppress it

I think if people saw the real me they wouldn’t accept me or like me

 Another reason we don’t think our default is abundance
 Because we have all this shit about us that we don’t like
 We think It’s BAD, all this stuff is bad
It doesn’t go anywhere. It’s the birth of ego, self hate. I literally reject myself and these
parts of myself
We think that only way to survive is to keep this deep dark subconscious stuff down
there, and keep on surprising it
 We are our own worst bullies
 we do it to survive
 we do it for protection
 this is the source of our misery

Leads to never truly knowing ourselves

 nConstantly monitoring it
 ever being truly authentic

Acting as if I don’t have these parts of myself, and the more I keep them down, we
become more of a stranger to ourselves, become less authentic, can’t develop
friendships and relationships.

Walk around in constant fear, can’t trust myself or other people

Leads to low self-esteem, self-sabotage, not feeling I’m enough, not feeling I deserve
things, feeling I have to TRY, instead of just being inspired. Huge success barrier

“To get what I want; I have to deserve what I want”

Well how can I deserve it if I have all this shit buried deep, this is the mindset.

We kill opportunities with women, because deep down I don’t even feel I deserve it, I
think I have so much shit. I think deep down that she’s getting a bad deal, why would
she want to be with this, so I repel it, push people away, remain stuck hating myself and
then get addicted to those feelings.

Leads to living a constant life undermining my success and progress

 thinking that even if I get it I’ll lose it anyway
 living in chronic stress, its exhausting - wearing me out
 no matter where I go, it eats me up inside

It gets worse and worse as standards get worse and worse

 we hate ourselves more and more
 less and less is okay to do
 taboo
 political correctness
 everything makes things worse

It’s crucial to dig this all up in order to let it go

16. part 3 - Pandora’s box
What’s deep down there?
What will I typically find?
 Unacceptable thoughts, beliefs, emotions, personality traits and traumatic
experiences
 They are not all bad and evil, its just that they were perceived as that way when
we were brought up

What could be down there?

Laughing - labelled and considered as bad, but of course it’s not, often in a sad family
where you are shamed or mocked or told not to laugh.
When was the last time I laughed? If it’s more than 2 hours, that’s serious

We think we suppress only negative things, but actually that’s not a deciding factor,
laughing, receiving positive feedback, giving yourself positive feedback, giving
ourselves props.

Ask where, how why it happened, what was i shamed for?

Being optimistic, excited, getting my hopes up for something

 perhaps i was shamed for that -

Creative is bad, it won’t get you anywhere in life

Being successful is bad, it gives you a big head

Making money is superficial - we believe making money is bad, it corrupts

Being loud or expressive

Being authentic

Expressing opinions

Liking a girl

Even loving and caring about myself: BAD, put other people’s needs first, don’t be
selfish.

Traumatic experiences are not always BAD, rape, violence, etc.

 getting lost in a store
 getting sent to room
 feels like abandonment
 watching a movie that’s scary
Trauma is anything perceived as life threatening based on my perception (any
potential or actual withdrawal of love)

Don’t lie to myself and say I have no trauma, we all do. What tends to happen is we
repress them because they are so intolerable.
 They don’t even consciously register and don’t even remember them
 we think there’s nothing there, but the subconscious always remembers

When we have unexplained habits, patterns, tendencies, it’s the unknown repressed
stuff that’s causing it

Unacceptable emotions
 anger, jealousy, anxiety, hurt, sadness, crying, feeling at all

In order to get through it you have to let go of all the resistance first
 layers and layers of resistance to get deeper down to this cause

Men don’t cry

Disagreement, confrontation: If we think that’s bad, birth of the people pleaser

 it’s unacceptable to say no
traumatised to disagree
 If i ever say yes when i want to say no or vice versa, its because there some shit
down below
17. part 3 - the process
This is why it’s so important to let go of the stuff in Pandora’s box
 this doesn’t mean fix it or changing it or understanding it
 letting go is embracing and accept it
 Its persisting because I resist it
 I have to renown it and accept it
 we are used to coping, compensating, distracting, and inflate our ego

Then part of ourselves that are good, if we add cool experiences, travel, girls, fun, self
growth, video content, writing, working, friends, etc. we think it will eventually
compensate for all the shit
 its endless and compulsive, blocking out the subconscious doesn’t work

It’s not about working onto the ego, it’s about dissolving it

This is how I become whole, and achieve abundance

I have to remove the split between acceptable and unacceptable. When I remove the
ego.

When I let go of the attachment of being a certain way I’ll have full self acceptance and
fully own who i am
 I become fully comfortable in my own skin
 I become deserving - just because - no reason

When you renown it, we become deserving, just because

 why would my default NOT be deserving

This is how I get core confidence, by fully accepting all the unacceptable things

I don’t have to approve of it or view it as good, and I don’t have to act on it if it’s truly
bad or unhelpful, but I do have to validate it and own it.

I just have to acknowledge that it’s there - this happened to me - that’s it.

If I have a bad thought, simply acknowledge that I have this bad thought. Don’t
suppress it.

I have to go back and validate all the unacceptable personality traits thoughts
emotions, and allow myself to experience them
 be with myself unconditionally

This is really terrifying – it’s not fun, there a reason they are buried deep down
I have to go through it all again to accept it and let it go
We suppress, suppress and spend our lives compensating, trying to push our ego
bigger and every once in a while we express our truth. When we push so much down,
eventually it bursts and we express for a moment

The only way to let go of it is to face it and accept it

 The only way out is through
 there is no way around it

Most personal development teaches us to work on our ego, instead, face pain head on,
I must turn in the direction of my aversion

I accept that i have to face this

18 - part 3; opening Pandora’s box
Digging this shit up is terrifying
 it means i have to face my biggest fears
 nothing scarier than facing the shit down there

facing all the unacceptable things that have been on repeat and getting stronger. I have
to go headfirst and plunge deep into it

There are often many, many layers that i have to get through in order to get deep down.
I have to accept each layer before i can even SEE what’s down there

The things we are most resistant to, are the things we really need

Nobody wants to face this, nobody. There is a reason I banished all this stuff in my
subconscious. I have invested a lot in keeping this stuff suppressed.

Bringing it up will not only bring out fear of rejection, abandonment and death when i
first experienced it.
 Facing each aspect of myself will bring up that same trauma that caused me to
suppress it
 Letting go of the resistance to the aspect will ALSO bring up that same trauma

It literally feels like death

 and its amplified because its been down there for so long

Let’s say there’s a little task

 check the bank account
 but I put it off, and put it off
 although its simple, i build up dread and

I’m invested in stuffing down emotions, so it hurts to break through

 it hurts to kill the ego
 I’ll have to let go of a lot of resistance as well - don’t resist the resistance, allow it
and accept it
 with time and repetition i’ll get through barriers of resistance
 keep going back to the same experiences and uncovering more and more until i hit
a tipping point where it all comes flooding out
 Don’t resist crying, shaking, any extreme sensations
 let them run the course, don’t block it - its GOOD

The goal isn’t to feel good, it’s to feel whatever I’m feeling
 embrace whatever is going on, pain and discomfort as well
 There’s always a link between suffering and transformation
  There’s a different between thinking about it and bringing awareness to it

I have to face it all, it will get worse before it gets better - don’t refuse to experience it!
FEEL IT, and don’t label it as good or bad.
19: Identify the subconscious

Must be aware to then let go of it

How can I dig it up?

Everyone is different, what’s unacceptable to me might be okay for someone else

I have to learn to become aware of what I’m not aware of

1. Think back to childhood

 What was I told that was bad and good

 what was unacceptable
 what was no acceptable
 What emotions did people react negatively
 what emotions did people react positively
 Which ones were repressed and which were accepted
 What were my family and cultural values
 What was encouraged and what was not
 What people did i spend time around the most
- what did they agree on?
- what was i shamed on?
 Make a list of potential beliefs, ideas, emotions, etc from society

2. Recurring patterns

 Habits, things that happen over again - its a sign of subconscious

 Things that happen over and over again are not just coincidence
 if you ask ‘why does this keep happening’ - you’ve identified something thats in
subconscious
 re-enactments of past events play out in relationships, work, accidents (this is
weird)
- seemingly random events

When you let go of this, you find you are no longer drawn to these situations

 The aspects that we suppress, we keep provoking those situations

 the overly positive guy who seems fake and is hiding negativity

What do I consider ‘success’ on a subconscious level

The cause is always the FIRST traumatic experience that happened

  then it goes on repeat and i constantly try to overcome it
 replay the sensations and go back and back asking ‘when was a previous time’,
then that will get to the cause
 when do I recreating different experience i have with parents, but with different
people
 Look at my life, look at what I’m always being pulled back to
 Do I label success unacceptable - was i shamed and mocked? even if my family
loved success, it could have happened somewhere else
 Get to the cause and stop recreating the same situation over and over again - no
longer a slave to our subconscious

3. Triggered

When you emotionally react that’s disproportionate to the logical way you should react
 approach anxiety crazy
 frustration at computers
 anger at situations

 Then you might experience guilt or shame, feeling like it’s not yourself
 It takes the form of anger, rage, anxiety, depression, drama, addictive behaviour
 It’s a signal, reminder that theres something that needs to be addressed

Whenever your triggered, make it a habit to become aware of it immediately or just

before it kicks in, as its bubbling up and about to come out.. then respond to it, get
perspective, and let go of it and what it comes from.

Remember it’s not about what triggered you but what it comes from

Become conscious of it, witness it, take your attention off what triggered you and sink
into where it comes from in my subconscious.

Go into the sensations of the feelings, and think about past times I felt that, go into it
and let it go.

Triggers can be anything, place, face, smell, thing,

Practice triggering yourself - lying down in public, talking out loud to the public about
a subject

4) escapism

Observe any habits where I COPE with it

 boredom, movies, youtube, Facebook, masterbation
 surfing the web, sleeping
Instead, DIVE into the subconscious and ask where it comes from and what it is, go
into it and let it go

Sink into it
 What were the go to’s of the people around me used when i grew up
 what escapes, triggers, etc

VERY hard to let go of escapism, because it’s not painful, its a release…
 but the temporary release gets harder and harder until it actually is painful

5. fears

Be aware of and sink into what am I afraid of

 not being in control
 not being loved and approved
 not succeeding
 be alone

Follow the trail of why and what..

 what would happen if..
 why?

Don’t stay in the same level loop

 let go of my resistance of the fear
 be okay with it
 end the ‘running away from’

let the sensations take over and let them be there and let them go
10: how to let go of the subconscious mind
First find and identify what exactly I’m letting go of and don’t reframe it.
 Simply dive into the body, notice sensations.
 Follow whatever comes up to its source, when was the previous or first time i felt
these exact sensations
 ask it over and over again until i get to the source

It won’t all come up at once, but the more you ask ‘when was the first time’ you’ll
eventually get there
 Don’t try to rush it or force it, let your subconscious bring it up
 If nothing comes up, just resistance, just let go of that, and try again next time
 whatever comes up, its what you need at that moment of time
 Have zero expectations
 There is a lot of shame, guilt and fear and resistence

Ask’ what’s the worst thing that could happen if let go of the resistance and let it come
up’.

Usually the subconscious offers a little bit at a time to check its okay, then more and
then all at once. There’s no wrong way of doing this, whatever comes up is what i need
at this moment

You have to be vulnerable, so do it in a safe environment, quiet and relaxed. No

distractions or interruptions, turn off everything, excite yourself, close your eyes and be
with yourself.
 Create a safe space
 Ground yourself, not just in the breathing, but in the earth as well
 Be there for yourself fully and unconditionally
 fully accept whatever comes up
 accept anything that happens and breath through it
 do not resist it and block it
 don’t assume its bad, its GOOD.
 it may get worse before it gets better
 Look for signs of relief, this means its being let go - its subtle
 i may not feel better or happier, as long as there a relief
 I can’t rush the process
 just change a little bit at a time