Johnathon Shaw

Advising and Supporting

In undergrad I learned that building relationships with your students is the most important

aspect of being a teacher. The same is true for being a student affairs professional. Of all the

competencies, I believe this one is currently my strongest one.

Building relationships is the cornerstone of any career. It is important to note that we as

student affairs personnel need to be mindful of the language we use while building relationships

with students. There are many regional cultures within the United States that respond differently

to body language and slang. Personally, I use a lot of idioms and local expressions throughout

my day. When building relationships with students, there is that fine line that one must walk

between being an authentic person around the students and still being professional. Students

respond better when they see the real you, but your everyday language might be received

differently by some students because of regional differences. An example of this is the word

“horseshoe.” Most people immediately think of that u-shaped iron bit that goes on a horse’s

hooves. I think of the central-Illinois food called a “horseshoe” that can be found at the county

fairs and in various dinners across the region where I am from. These issues can be

compounded and exaggerated with international students as well.

Body language is another critical aspect of this competency. Student affairs

professionals need to look like they are listening to their students and they need to look like they

care. While you may be perfectly capable of listening to a student and skimming an email, the

student will read that you are not interested in what they have to say. Also, we need to be aware
of our students’ nonverbal cues. Knowing if a student is uncomfortable, upset, or excited before

they even speak can inform us of what the next appropriate step is to be.

Even though this is one of my strong suits, working on building meaningful relationships

is something that I will work on for the rest of my life.