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Watching carefully over his father’s flock with his eyes firmly closed, Paris leapt abruptly to his
size thirteen feet when someone cleared their throat emphatically just by his cauliflower-like left
ear.
“Who…what?” stuttered the reluctant shepherd through his thin lips as he straightened up to his
full five foot height.
“Where, when and why?” added a slim youth who was wearing nothing but a pair of golden
sandals with white flapping swan wings attached. “I am Hermes, messenger of almighty Zeus,
and once again working overtime on a Sunday without any extra pay! I am going to have to talk
to my union about this!”
Paris, baby blue eyes wide in shock and awe, listened carefully for once in his short life as
Hermes, waving his tanned hands around dramatically, explained why he had come down from
the giddy, snow-tipped heights of Mount Olympus.
“You mean that I have been chosen to judge a beauty contest?” the young shepherd asked
eagerly, visions of incredible loveliness dancing through his tiny mind.
“Indeed. The contestants are…”
“Gorgeous, beautiful and stunning, I hope!” stated Paris with a snigger.
“Almost certainly but they are also immortals! You have to decide between Hera, Zeus’ wife and
queen of Olympus, Athene, the goddess of wisdom and Aphrodite, the love goddess! Best of
luck, mate!”
After handing Paris a golden apple to be the prize for the winner, Hermes leapt into the air and
flew rapidly away, relieved to have passed on Zeus’ instructions and to be out of the firing line.
Maybe it was time to take a long holiday? he mused as he headed upwards towards the clouds.
It’s a tough job but someone’s got to do it, thought Paris with a grin as he held the apple and
watched the sun’s bright rays glint upon the polished surface. An inscription read ‘to the fairest’
and Paris smiled broadly, displaying his pearly-white teeth as he thought about the pleasure to
come. Tossing the apple up and down with his strong fingers as if it was a tennis ball, he sat
down on a nearby tree stump and waited impatiently for the first immortal to appear while the
sheep scattered across the fields.
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Grabbing the skin, the Cyclops upended it and tipped the whole contents down his throat in an
instant then gulped.
“Hmm not bad. Any more?”
“A few,” replied the captain, beckoning to his crew to pass the wineskins along to him. They did
so slowly, unsure of his purpose but willing to trust the man who had helped them survive the
long war against Troy through his trickery.
It took a dozen whole skins to make Polyphemus feel a little tipsy. He yawned then settled down
by the fire, making a few loose boulders tumble down from the roof as he slumped to the ground.
“Good night, Greeks. Sleep well and I’ll eat you in the morning,” he crooned softly, chuckling
drunkenly until he started to snore. It was like a foghorn as it reverberated around the cavern and
the Greeks covered their ears as the sound threatened to deafen them.
“Grab his crook, lads, and bring it over to the fire!” bellowed Odysseus and his crew stumbled
over, picked up the colossal shepherd’s crook and staggered over to the roaring flames with it.
Ordering Polites to get the end hardened in the flames, Odysseus strolled over to the giant and
examined him carefully. Fortunately Polyphemus had slumped over on his side and so his single
eye was in reach. Odysseus’ plan was going to work!
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