365 Dob

Table
of Contents
Copyright Notice
Dedication
Acknowledgments
Epigraph
An Introduction to Anti-Programming
A Revolt is in Order
Assume Formlessness
Here’s How You Use This Book
Structuring Your Workouts
As such, here are the standard setups for training:
The manner in which I typically structure my workouts:
Do It. Don’t Talk About It.
Rite of Passage Workouts
The Baby Steps Workout
Murph
DT
Grace
Linda aka "3 Bars of Death"
The Horrifically Painful 30 Minute Overhead Anyhow
Challenge
Chef Rush and the White House Bicep Routine from Hell
Steve Michalik’s Intensity and Insanity for Chest, Shoulders,
Arms
Chest
Shoulders
Triceps
Biceps
Abs
Marvin Eder- A Festival of Pain… Er, I Mean Dips
Bodybuilders
Lee Priest: Demigod-Level Arm Training
Upper Arms
Freddy Ortiz: Add a Couple Reps? How About You Add
Some Sets to Grow.
Chest
Arms
Brutally In-Depth: John DeFendis’ Intensity or Insanity
Routine
Intensity or Insanity Training
Day One
Day Two
Diet
Bob Birdsong- If Overtraining Was a Legitimate Concern,
His Corpse Would Extra Dead… and His Forearms Would
be Tiny (But He’s Alive and Well)
Bob Birdsong’s Six Day a Week Forearm Routine
Monday / Wednesday / Friday
Tuesday / Thursday
Rob Colacino: Psycho-Burst Training
Chest
Back
Shoulders
Arms
Legs
Harold Poole: The Full Body Bloodbath of the First Black
Mr. America
Full Body Routine, Done 3-4x a Week
Dorian Yates: Blood and Guts
Day 1- Delts, Traps, Triceps, Abs
Day 2- Back, Rear Delts
Day 4- Chest and Biceps
Day 6- Legs
Jeff King: Train Legs Twice a Week and Get Twice the
Gainz
Off Season Leg Training
“Powerlifting” Squat Routine
Leo Stern: An Old School Two Day Split for Strength and
Mass
Days 1, 3, and 5
Days 2,4, and 6
Scott Wilson
Back Routine 2-3x a Week
John McWilliams: 20” Muscular Arms in the Pre-Steroid Era
Prove it is Possible to Do Without Gear
Arms Program
Armand Tanny: Old School Superset Madness
The Supersets
Brutal Bertil Fox: The Strongest Bodybuilder of the 1980s
and His Gnarly Strip Sets of Death
His Training Split
Abs
Monday: Shoulders and Arms
Tuesday: Back and Chest
Wednesday: Legs and Arms
Bertil's Beginner's Routine
Strongmen
Zydrunas Savickas- It’s Hard to Out-Great the GOAT
Strongman
Monday- Legs
Tuesday- Chest and Triceps
Wednesday- Back
Thursday- Overhead
Friday- Conditioning
Saturday- Farmer’s Walk
Manfred Hoeberl- 26” Arms are Useful in Strongman
Hoeberl’s Once Per Week Arm Workout
Jesse Marunde: Training Like a Strongman Phenom
Morning: Light-to-Moderate Workout (6AM)
Basic Warmup
Monday- Weightlifting and Sandbags
Tuesday- Snatches, Squats, and Sled
Wednesday- Light Back and Grip
Thursday- Heavy Back and Shoulders
Friday- Light Weightlifting and Back
Squat to Push Press
Saturday- Events (no AM Workout)
Sunday- Conditioning
Magnus Samuelsson- Legendary Grip Strength
Biceps
Grip Training Program 1
Hybrid Athletes
Brutally In Depth: Pillow- The Insanely Shredded She-Beast
of Bodybuilding and Nerdlesque
Jon Cole- King of the Supertotal and the First Collegiate
Strength Coach in History
Week One
Day 1
Day 2
Day 3
Week Two
Day 4
Day 5
Day 6
Brutally In Depth: Chuck Sipes- the Natty AF Bodybuilding
Paratrooper With a Bench That Shocked the World
Vital Stats
Contest History
Best Lifts
Monday/Thursday
Tuesday/Friday
Power Arm Routine
Monday/Thursday
Superset One
Superset Two
Shape and Size Arm Routine
Monday/Thursday
Tuesday/Friday
Forearm Routine
Chet Yorton- the Father of Natural Bodybuilding (And the
Only Guy to Beat Arnold)
Day 1: Chest, Shoulders and Triceps
Day 2: Back, Biceps and Legs
Brutally In Depth: Ivan Putski, Overhead Presser
Extraordinaire
Monday: Chest and Shoulders
Tuesday: Legs
Wednesday: Arms and Deads
Mariusz Pudzianowski- Too Sexy for This Planet
Day 1 AM: Legs and Lats
Day 1 PM: Events
Day 2 AM: Legs and Shoulders
Day 2 PM: Events
Day 3 AM: Chest and Tris
Day 3 PM: Events
Paul Anderson- When You’re This Strong, You Can Pretty
Much Do Whatever You Want
Powerlifting Routine
Mon, Weds, Fri: Shoulders and Chest
Tues, Thurs, Sat: Squat and Deadlift
Olympic Weightlifting Routine
Mon, Weds, and Fri: Everything But the
Squat
Tues, Thurs, Sat: Squat
Svend Karlsen- Viking Power Like What
Day 1: Events and Triceps
Day 2: Squatting
Day 3: Cardio
Day 4: More Events
Day 5: Deadlifts
Day 6: Cardio
Day 7: More Deadlifts
Day 8: Rest
Brutally In Depth: John Grimek- People Take This
Programming Shit WAY Too Seriously
Vital Statistics
Training Outlined
Steve Merjanian- I’ve Got 500lb Incline and a Pair of
Speedos... Let’s Party
Tuesday / Thursday / Saturday / Sunday
Pat Neve- Bench Specialist Turned Bodybuilder Turned Rich
Motherfucker
Tuesday and Saturday: Bench Training
Eddie Robinson- Essentially the WSM of the 1980s
Bodybuilding Scene
Monday: Abdominals, Chest, Triceps
Tuesday: Abdominals, Back, Biceps
Wednesday: Off
Thursday: Abdominals, Quads, Hamstrings
Friday: Abdominals, Shoulders, Calves
Saturday and Sunday: Off
Doug Furnas- You Thought Jim Brown and Donald Dinnie
had Best All-Round Athlete on Lock?
Monday: Legs
Tuesday: Off
Wednesday: Chest
Thursday: Shoulders
Friday: Back
Saturday: Light Chest and Arms
Powerlifters
Brutally in Depth: The Compiled Methods of the Original
Culver City Westside Barbell Club
The Culver City Westside Barbell Crew
Bill West's Original Training Methods
The Basic Westside Routine
Tuesday
Wednesday
Saturday
Sunday
The Add-Ons
The Rack Pull / Box Deadlift
Snatch Grip Deadlift Day
Deficit Deadlifts
Tuesday
Saturday
High Pulls / Power Clean
Good Mornings
Box Squat in the Power Rack
Tuesday
Bill West's Balls Out Bench Press Routine
The Heavy Days
The Lighter Day
The Westside Triceps Slaughterhouse
Tuesday/Friday
The Touch System
Tuesday Workout
Saturday Workout
Incline Power Rack Presses
Stefi Cohen- The Deadlifting GOAT’s Squat Training
A Squat Session with Stefi Cohen
Doug Young- The Bench Press Badass the Internet Loves as
a Muscle Bear
Legendary 8 Month Bench Specialization Routine
Roger Estep- If You’re Gonna Lift Big Weights, You Might
as Well Look Good Doing It
Monday
Wednesday
Jeremy Hoornstra- Sometimes Benching More Than You
Squat is Cool as Shit
Brutally In Depth: Terrible Ted Arcidi, Bench Beast and
Utter Maniac
Vital Statistics
The Various Victuals of Terrible Ted
Terrible Ted’s Bench-Tastic Training Cycle
Off Season Training Framework
Monday:
Tuesday:
Wednesday:
Thursday:
Friday:
Saturday:
11 Week Contest Cycle
Monday (Day 1)
Thursday (Day 2)
Saturday (Day 3)
Jennifer Thompson- Natty Superwoman
Speed Week
Chest
Shoulders and Tris
Heavy Week
Chest
Shoulders and Tris
Vince Anello and Larry Pacifico- Bodybuilders and World
Champion Powerlifters Flying (and Winning) By the Seats
of Their Goddamn Pants
Day 1: Deadlift Isometrics
Day 2: Light Back
Day 3: Heavy Squat and Bench
Day 4: OFF
Day 5: Deadlift
Day 6: More Light Back
Day 7: Squat and Bench
Brutally In Depth: Pat Casey Outworks Everyone in History
Monday:
Tuesday
Friday
Saturday:
Monday
Wednesday
Friday
Pat Casey’s Shoulder and Arm Specialization
Monday
Wednesday
Friday
Weightlifters
Dmitriy Klokov- If Jesus Had Been a Russian Weightlifter,
His Name Would Have Been Klokov, Because This
Motherfucker Walks on Water
Monday
Tuesday
Wednesday
Friday
Saturday
Russ Knipp- He Strict Pressed Your Best Bench… Weighing
Only 165lbs
Mon, Wed, Fri
Tues and Thurs
Saturday
Brutally In Depth: Ike Berger- The Odd Lift Virtuoso and
Beast-Mode, Pocket-Sized Weightlifter
Contest Prep Routine
Monday (Medium-Heavy)
Wednesday (Medium)
Friday (Heavy as Hell)
Wednesday (Medium)
Brutally In Depth: Coach Fang, Tian Tao, and Squatting
Like a Fucking Monster with the Chinese Weightlifting
Method
Tian Tao, the Squatting Machine
Monday
Tuesday
Wednesday
Thursday
Friday
Saturday
Some of the Assistance Work
Bob Bednarski- 100% American Built Muscle
Monday Morning:
Monday Evening
Wednesday Morning
Wednesday Evening
Saturday
Sunday
Wrestlers / Fighters / Arm Wrestlers / Random Weirdos
Brutally In Depth: Bruno Sammartino- From War Refugee to
World Champion
Elias: Badass Active Recovery on a Rest Day
George Irving Nathanson: Rest Pause Insanity for One Lift
Specialization
Isaac Nesser: Probable Bullshit Artist, But Interesting
Nonetheless
Monday: Heavy Day (Legs)
Tuesday: Light Day (Arms and Shoulders)
Wednesday: Heavy Day (Back)
Thursday: Light Day (Shoulders and Arms)
Friday: Heavy Day (Chest)
Saturday: Light Day (Speed Training)
Sunday: Heavy Day (Legs)
Braun Strowman: Simulating Strongman Events to Trash
Guys Who Have Real Implements
Use A Squat Rack To Simulate A Car Deadlift
Seated Military Press on a Flat Bench For The Log
Clean and Press
Squat Rack Isometrics as a Substitute for the Yoke
Use a bucket of sand for the Farmer's Walk.
Rob Vigant Jr’s Forearms of Doom
Brutally In Depth: The Ultimate Warrior,
The Ultimate Warrior’s Vital Stats
The Warrior's Mass Split
Monday / Thursday: Squats and
Deadlifts
Tuesdays / Friday: Chest and Back
Weekend: Shoulders and Arms
The Warrior's Routine on the Road
Goldberg: Train Like an Athlete and You’ll Perform Like
One
Monday- Cleans and Squats
Tuesday- Snatches and Incline Bench
Thursday- Overhead and Back
Friday- More Overhead and High Pulls
Diet: This Shit Ain’t That Hard
Unless You’re Already a Disgusting Landbeast (and I Mean
Landbeast, not “Could Be Leaner”), Bulk, then Cut
Randall's First Routine, Aka the "Curls for the
Girls" Routine
The Basis of Bruce Randall's Second Routine
Randall's Best Lifts (after 2 years of training, at
335-410lbs)
Randall's "Reduction" Routine
Breakfast
Lunch
Dinner
Bruce Randall's Competition History
Another Case for Bulking First- The Story of 1980s
Powerlifting Monster George Hechter
The Hepburn Routine
A Month of Meals for Assholes
A Word on Eating Red Meat
The Basics
Better Brisket Than Most Restaurants (Without
Using Brisket or a Smoker)
Mamma Chaos’ Meatballs
Tara’s Oven Roasted Chicken
Mamma Chaos (Almost) Competition Winning
Chili
Tara’s Tacos (without the Envelope)
The Easiest Portable Gainz in History- Mexican
Beef, Beans, and Rice
The Fat Kid Meals
Jamie’s Butter Chicken
Sausage Gravy That Will Get You Laid
Tara’s more Bacon than Potato Soup
Baked Mac and Cheese
Hypertrophic Coney Island Hot Dogs
The Greek Sauce
Isocaloric (If you want) Spaghetti Pie
Lazy ass meal prep, Keto(ish)
Keto Chicken Tenders
Tara’s Bone Broth
Tara’s Lazyass Crockpot Buffalo Chicken
One Pan Oh Fuck! Keto Chicken and Sausage
Bake
Jamie’s Go To: Steak and Chimi
The Chimi
The Steak
Crockpot Carnitas
Chicken Asparagus Packages
Egg Cupcakes
“Everyone Loves Bacon” Wrapped Chicken
Parmesan Crunchies
Lazy ass meal prep, Marinades
LT's Easy Ass Marinade
Drunk Limey Bastard
Jamie’s Go To Garlic - Parm Marinade
Basic Garlic Herb Butter
Use Everywhere Marinade
Lazy ass meal prep, Rotisserie Chicken Meals
Chicken-Broccoli Alfredo
Chicken Tortilla Soup
Italian Wedding Soup
Spicy Baked Broccoli & chicken
Before You Buy a Weight Gainer, Behold the Bulking Shakes of the
Golden Age of Bodybuilding
Blair's Creamy Delicious
Blair's Light Creamy
Blair's Yogurt Delight
Blair's California Coconut Delight
Vince Gironda's Hormone Precursor Shake
Bob Hoffman's Hi-Proteen Shake
McCallum's Get Big Drink
365 Days of Brutality
An Anti - Programming Manifesto
By Jamie Lewis
Edited By Tara Chaos
Cover Image by Brigitte Werner (pixabay.com/werner22brigitte)
Cover Art By Tara Chaos
First Edition – July 2019
Copyright Notice
365 Days of Brutality by Jamie Lewis

Published by Plague of Strength, LTD. Roebling, NJ 08554
www.plagueofstrength.com
© 2019 Jamie Lewis
All rights reserved. No portion of this book may be reproduced in any form
without permission from the publisher, except as permitted by U.S. copyright
law. For permissions contact:
Jamie.plagueofstrength@gmail.com
Cover by Tara Chaos

Cover Art By Brigitte Werner
Ebook ASIN: B07RRR7J7J
Amazon ISBN: 9781098582784
Dedication
This is for all those who supported the

old Chaos and Pain blog, Chaos and
Pain supplements, and now Plague of
Strength,

You rule.

Thanks for supporting the strength
sports underground.

And to all of those who said I couldn't,
shouldn't and wouldn't ?

Suck it.
Acknowledgments
Plague of Strength would like to acknowledge the following people, because

without you guys the book wouldn’t have gotten done:
Cali Sean… Thank you for all the pizzas, friendly ears, and chances to shoot
shit. And the help with the AC unit, cause we would have killed each other long
before the book was done without AC.
All of badass donors at Plague of Strength… without your help, none of this
would be possible.
To the people who have supported Chaos and Pain over the years- thanks for
betting on the only person in the industry who was willing to tell it like it is and
actually help people get stronger, rather than just pretend to be a bro, steal
money for shit information, and generally fuck up the lifting scene.
And finally…we would like to offer a special thank you to both of our families
for making us the adorable, stubborn badasses we are today. Mama & Pops
Chaos, Mr. and Mrs. Lewis - w ithout you pushing us and putting up with us
and pushing us to be the best uses possible, none of this would have come to
fruition . You were pivotal in us turning out to be the orkish, hardworking, iron-
lus t-having maniacs we have come to be.
Epigraph
“Work hard, play hard. And whatever you

do, do it with the volume turned up.”
Nolan Bushnell, genius founder of Atari and
Chuck E. Cheese, and arguably the best
employer in the history of commerce
An Introduction to Anti-
Programming
Over the course of the last ten years, it seems, lifting has gone from a pastime for
athletic misfits who wanted an outlet for their aggression and testosterone to a
milquetoast, mainstream pastime that most people view as work, and one that
most lifters treat like they’re punching a clock on an assembly line. Gone is the
artistry, inventiveness, and camaraderie, replaced by a bunch of dickheads in
pastel velour and lame ass Gymshark shirts bearing spiritless programs created
by soulless, thieving, snake oil salesmen with no respect for the culture they’re
actively destroying.
What you will find in these pages are a hazy outline of success, not a step-by-
step guide to physical greatness. There is no step-by-step roadmap to
strength sports success , and anyone who says otherwise is selling you a
goddamn lie. Champions are forged, not formulated, and it is the fire of their
will that shapes them, not the byzantine mathematical process by which some
long-dead Russian prescribed training methods for a pack of half-starved
peasants, poisoned by their environment, living under a brutal, despotic regime
(I’m talking about periodization, for those of you who don’t get the reference).
That’s right- this is an anti-programming manifesto . If you shelve this book

next to a copy of Zatsiorsky’s text or Siff’s bland bullshit, there is a very real
chance those other books will screech and burn and run flaming into the night.
Nevermind the ethereal, spidery arms of doom projecting from this book’s cover
when that happens- they’re just here to keep you safe from the spate of know-
nothing charlatans who consider Henry Ford to be the godfather of modern
bodybuilding.
“We’re the anti-influencer influencers,” said badass gourmet ice cream

truck owner Joe Nicci. “It’s weird … but I think it’s really fun. I
hope it inspires [people] to hold their own and tell [influencers] to
fuck off.”
No matter what 150lb “gurus” on Instagram might assert, programming is, by
and large, utter bullshit. It’s unnecessary and counterproductive for most people,
and has been sold to people who don’t know any better because it takes thought
out of the equation and allows lifters to blame other people when their progress
stalls or the program fails. And even when it succeeds, what assures the lifter
that they could not have matched the results they achieved, or exceeded them,
simply on the merits of their own hard work? Nothing. That’s what.
Maybe you drive the speed limit on a deserted highway in the middle of the
night, when there’s no traffic. You could get where you’re going a hell of a lot
faster, but you’re of the opinion that slow and steady wins the race, and you’re
gonna follow the directions of a person you’ve never met to get the most people
to a destination in a reasonable period of time, not the people who blazed new
trails, tried alternative routes and different means of travel. Well, if you are that
kind of slow-and-steady wins the race type, put this book down and walk away,
and enjoy your lifetime of drudgery and mediocrity.
Lifting weights and dieting is just as much a method of self-expression as
painting or acting. There’s a reason that certain actors take such pride in the
physical transformations they pull off- for guys like Tom Hardy, looking like
Bane was just as important as acting like a homicidal maniac. It’s not supposed
to be some sort of shake and bake, four month transformation that you post
about on Instagram and then abandon. Lifting, real lifting , is gritty, dirty,
sweaty battle between you and gravity. It’s about relentless self improvement in
the face of any and all adversity. About overcoming obstacles and destroying
them to get what you want.
Yeah, this book flies in the face of just about every goddamned thing you read on
the internet these days. For instance, there’s no talk of RPEs because RPEs are a
stupid metric for weak people who don’t work hard. I’ve been training for over
25 years, set a world record in powerlifting without even training two of the lifts
(I never trained the reverse grip I used on the bench, and hadn’t deadlifted once
in the gym for at least two years prior to breaking the total and tying the squat
records), and know a lot of elite lifters and world record holders- there is not a
single one of them who uses that dumbass goddamn metric .
And before you kvetch and whine and wring your hands about magical steroids
enabling people to do anything they want, take note of the fact that I’ve included
plenty of pre-steroid era lifters in here. This obviates the need for calling
bullshit on their natty status, though I know the internet seems to think the use of
fake plates was in vogue back in those days for some reason (that’s really an
internet age thing unless you were doing a photo shoot for a magazine or in a
film- fake plates were not easy to come by).
A Revolt is in Order
What I am suggesting here is a full blown revolt against the current status quo in
the lifting world. It is full to bursting with bullshit artists and charlatans of every
kind, fake coaches, imaginary gurus, and an untold number of people who are
looking to make a quick buck off kids who don’t know any better.
Revolt, not reform, allows one to transcend the present and perfect the future. It
is proactive, while the latter is reactive- it is destruction for its own sake, with
little regard for what replaces the present state. It is revolt, then, that must save
us, because we are creatures teetering on the brink of extinction. Efficiency shall
not play a role in this revolt, because efficiency and mediocrity are shacked up
together having the lamest, one pile of laundry atop another pile of laundry
uninspired sex you wish you hadn’t tried to imagine.
Consider the application of efficiency to nearly anything that requires passion- in

literature, efficient writing is often dull to the point of being unreadable; in sex,
efficiency is not going to have your partner bragging on Insta about how you
blew out her back or he or she yours, because efficient sex is just enough to get
the job done; efficient fighters win by decision, balancing their strengths against
those of their opponent to win Mayweather-style snoozefests; efficient design
and architecture is always spartan and ultimately forgettable; and efficient
warfighting is often indecisive and protracted. Passionate people go all in to win
it all, and hold nothing in reserve. Anything less than total victory or total
effort is complete defeat and a waste of goddamned time.
"Enemies are the price of success."

True strength is feared, reviled, marginalized, and demonized. Self-reliance is
lambasted as exclusionary and sociopathy. Self improvement in the modern era
has become the disgusting field of "self help", which is naught but excuse-
making and pseudoscience. True self improvement is considered at best to be
self-indulgent and at worst to be self-destructive solipsism, when it is in fact
neither.
This book is not designed for me to “help me, help you”- this book is designed
for you to grab your balls or ovaries, head to the gym, and smash some iron in a
manner inspired by the greats. In a way that allows you to look at the dickheads
in your gym who are punching a clock like Soviet factory workers while
utilizing some garbage program created for long dead, half starved Russian field
hands and laugh, because you will succeed where they failed on your own merit.
And you will do so by training hard, enjoying it as you do so, and doing it
with the goddamn volume turned up to 11 .
Assume Formlessness
A wise man once said, “Seek change within yourself and find out what is
permanent.” That is great advice throughout life, but even more so inside the
gym. Don’t just pick a sport because you think it’s cool and do that to the
exclusion of all of the other cool shit out there. When you do that, you end up
the powerlifter with a shit overhead press, or the weightlifter who can’t bench
your bodyweight, or a strongman competitor who’s so broken from only training
events they can’t just smash through a hammer strength workout and enjoy the
massive pump they get. You don’t want to end up in a situation in any gym
where someone can chump you on their pet lift when you’re in a new
environment. Yeah, they might edge you out, but you at least want to be in the
conversation, right? By the same token, you don’t want to be the slob who’s the
strongest person in the gym but afraid to hit the beach and strip to their swimsuit.
Damn that “Doughnuts and deadlifts” horseshit- the goal of lifting has always
been to look good, feel like a demigod, and throw around serious weight.
Keep your competition and yourself off-balance. Challenge yourself. Doing the
same boring bullshit day in and day out does neither. Continue to re-form
yourself according to what you want to achieve. Yeah, the Redditors in your
gym will accuse you of “program hopping,” because they are weak people with
no goals who want others to be the same lame sonsabitches that they are. Call it
periodization if you want, but periodically switching your focus from one
discipline to another, or to a grab bag of all of them, will keep you from getting
stale, and that is the key to longevity in training. Additionally, those bare bones
programs neglect every cool little muscle that prevents injury when you jack
something up during a lift- they’re the precious little unnameable muscles that
you need to work with the weird stuff to ensure your physique is as well-
balanced as you think it is with a bare bones routine.
“No phenomenon exhibits “being.” All phenomena consist of ongoing

processes; they consist of various doings.”
That means you are not a powerlifter. You are not a bodybuilder. You are not a
weightlifter. You are not a strongman.
You are a lifter.
The sport in which you compete doesn’t define you- the weight you move and
the force of will you exert against it does. Whatever sport you pick isn’t gonna
make you “cool.” By and large, those people in the gym who define themselves
by the sport about which almost no one in the world gives a flying rat’s ass are
the least likeable, most unjustifiably pompous shitbirds across which you’ll run-
if you hadn’t noticed, powerlifters are about as low on the public’s watchlist for
sports as it could be, beaten easily by weightlifting and strongman simply
because they’re on TV. Nevertheless, the average person doesn’t give a single
wet shit about any of them, because they have no metric by which they can
compare your pet lift with the weight and strain of a daily activity.
Before you run off screaming about the hypocrisy inherent in the above
statement given the various sections of this book, calm your tits. The sections
are divided as such to give you an idea of the workouts contained therein. As a
general rule, I chose athletes who were both strong and well built, so that none
of them could be pigeonholed at a glance as one thing or another.
As you’ll see with the hybrid athletes in particular, but throughout the book, is
that from the Chinese weightlifting team using bodybuilding exercises to
bodybuilders who bench 500 for reps, blending your methodologies and lifting
disciplines yields far more results than dogmatically repeating the performance
of a few lifts. And more than that- restricting yourself to a single discipline is
painfully boring and belies a lack of imagination and true appreciation for lifting
that would indicate that you should probably just take up knitting and stop taking
up space in our gyms.
Need more convincing?
● CrossFit champ Tia-Clair Tommy has no program of any kind, and she
actively avoids falling into a routine with their training. Toomey, weighing
125, pulled 415, strict pressed 130, and squatted 330 in the CrossFit total,
doing nine max effort attempts in 12 minutes (4 minutes for 3 attempts at
each lift). That puts her in the top 15 squats at that weight in 2018 and top
3 deadlifts, and she both loaded her own weights and did all of her
attempts for each lift within four goddamned minutes. And if that wasn’t
enough, she also pulled down a gold medal in weightlifting in the
Commonwealth Games that same year.
● 63 year old armwrestling monster Richard Lupkes, who also wrestled for
about a decade in the WCW, has only ever seen an arm wrestling table in
tournaments. For his training he just lifts as heavy as humanly possible, 2-
3 hours a day, 5-6 days a week.
● The Chinese Olympic weightlifting team is required to do bodybuilding

exercises at the end of every workout to improve their overhead strength,
and they all look like bodybuilders as a result.
● Chen Wei-ling, a Taiwanese weightlifter who snagged Olympic gold in

her weightclass in 2008 has parlayed her insane abilities into a number of
all time records in powerlifting as well.
● Practically every useful wrestler you can name from the 70s, 80s, and
90s had a bench of between 500 and 700 pounds, and they almost all came
from a background in bodybuilding, not powerlifting.
Here’s How You Use This Book
This is clearly not a book for beginners . There are plenty out there if you
want one, but if you’re new to the game, you can always just on into the more
difficult shit- I’d just cut the number of sets per exercise in half, at least until you
build a baseline level of physical fitness.
If you want a beginner oriented book, I recommend Dinosaur Training by

Brooks Kubik. It’s not technically a beginner book, but hopefully you’re the sort
who’s chewing nails and shitting lightning rather than slumping their way
through the gym, which would mean you’re not someone who thinks they need
training wheels. And that’s good, because you don’t.
Structuring Your Workouts
Because everyone is so hell bent on paying for their gains and begging strangers
for their useless, uninformed, and counterproductive opinions rather than
experimenting themselves and seeing what works for them, no one seems to
know what the fuck they’re doing in the gym anymore. Without some vaunted
program, they’re just wandering around the gym like brainless assholes, never
actually committing to an exercise and ultimately getting nothing done.
You have to commit . Not to a program, or even a workout. Gains are made by
committing yourself fully to the task at hand, no matter how goddamned stupid,
and bending the very laws of gravity to your inexorable will.
This means that when you choose to do something in the gym, that set is all you
are- you have to tune out all of the bullshit around you, ignore everyone and
everything and throw yourself into that set, and that rep. Stop texting and
filming and all of that shit. Throw on some music that wills your eyes with
blood and your heart with hate and attack the weights like they committed an
unspeakable act. That is how you make gains- not by entering numbers into a
spreadsheet and blindly following some dumbshit program like a lemming off a
cliff.
I realize you’re still going to want some structure, because for whatever reason,
people deny the efficacy of my grab bag approach. The only rule here is that
you should avoid doing the same thing today that you did yesterday. That
doesn’t mean exercises or bodyparts- all of that nonsense about making no gains
if you train the same lifts daily runs counter to the entirety of human existence.
If you can’t build muscle training the same muscle groups daily, how are the
Chinese Olympic weightlifters so jacked? Why are gymnasts the most muscular
people under 5’ you ever saw? Why do cyclists have such crazy quad and calf
development?
Like I said, it’s time to forget most of what you know, because if you think about
it, most of what you know could be disproven by a middle school kid who’s
become “the jacked kid” in school by doing pushups all summer, Herschell
Walker style.
As such, here are the standard setups for training:
● Push/Pull/Squat . Pretty straightforward. Day 1 you do upper body

pushing movements, Day 2 is pulling, Day 3 you train your legs. Then
you either rest, or repeat once and then rest.
● Bodypart - Train a major bodypart a day. This isn’t rocket surgery. A

lot of people run these two days on, one off. You can experiment with the
off days, or just take them as you need them, which seems to be a bit less
rigid (and far more intelligent).
● Movement- Train a movement a day, like the clean, or the squat, etc.
Those are pretty fun to do, and one set/rep scheme I like for this is
10,8,6,4,2,2,4,6,8,10. Each set gets progressively heavier, after you
warmup. The second double is heavier than the first, and then the sets
thereafter are all heavier than your initial set with that rep count. This is
awesome for just about any movement you pick. Rest days work the same
as bodypart routines.
● Full Body - Pretty simple- train the full body every day. Olympic lifters
love doing this, and old school guys like Harold Poole, as you’ll see, built
the basis for their physiques with them.
So when you happen upon something you want to try in these pages, just grab it
and mash it into your week. Find a way to wedge it in. Get creative- it’ll fit.
And if it doesn’t fit, make it fit.
The manner in which I typically structure my

workouts:
I truly despise writing about myself, but I am invariably and incessantly

asked. As such, here we go.
Pick an exercise or a bodypart. My choice varies from day to day. If I were

to pick military press, I would do that first, for singles, doubles, and
triples. Then, I would backload a ton of volume into the rest of the
workout with machines and cables, hitting the main muscle group and
some of the supporting muscle groups. So, my workout would look like
this:
Standing Military Press - 3 x 3; 5 x 2; 3 x 1
Hammer Strength Shoulder Press - 6 x 4-15

Cable Lateral Raises - 4 x 15
Rear Lateral Raises - 4 x 16

Straight Bar Pushdowns - 4 x 12
As a general rule, I throw rear delts and triceps in with as much frequency as
possible, because they can handle a ton of volume and there has never in history
been a person with either of those muscle groups so overdeveloped they looked
grotesque. Be a size queen - bigger is indeed better.
Last, but not least, unless otherwise indicated, the sets
listed throughout this book are work sets, not work
sets + warmups .
It’s always a good idea to throw in some warmup sets, because few of us can
jump into work weights without getting our head into the game a bit. Plus, it’ll
keep you from having your limbs just rip right off and spine crumble like an old
cookie for piling weight on them without priming the pump first, so to speak.
Do It. Don’t Talk About It.
Rocky Marciano once said, “Do it. Don’t talk about it.” The man was the only
undefeated heavyweight champion ever and was so undersized he’d even be a
small cruiserweight today. In spite of being pocket-sized and not particularly
quick or skilled, he out-worked everyone and went on to win 43 fights by
knockout.
This beast never talked about being the champ outside of the ring- the
neighborhood kids were amazed that he’d come home from fights and toss the
football around with them in the street like regular-old Joe Blow. Did he ever
bore them to death with talk of his workouts, or his diet, or any other of the
lifting-related minutia people endlessly discuss as if it matters in the slightest?
No- he was too busy training, or reading books, or playing football with
neighborhood kids, or practicing his Italian. There’s a great big wide world out
there, assholes. So shut the hell up about training and your diet and learn about
it.
What matters is exactly what most people lack: effort. Execution. And the
reason? They spend so much energy boring everyone to death with talk of what
they’re doing or going to do that they siphon valuable energy from what they
should be doing- training. When you do that, you’re an energy leech off
yourself and others and you’re preventing yourself from being anything than
what the hideously vast majority of people are- pathetically average or below
average.
While we’re at it, stop telling people your training and physique goals. Holy
shit. Years ago, I thought I had driven this goddamned point home harder than
Paul Walker drove his into a lamp post, but here’s a refresher- if you tell people
your goals, you’re less likely to achieve them than Paul Walker and Ryan Dunn
are to star in the next Fast and the Furious. It’s science– people who do that
create something called a social reality in which their brain thinks its achieved
the goal already, and the social recognition everyone seems to crave so much
makes them so absurdly happy inside that they just throw up your hands and say
to hell with it, I’m close enough... and then proceed to bore us all with endless
posts of spiritless gym drudgery replete with a litany of excuses for poor
performance.
To Wrap Things Up…
This is not your sport. It’s the sport of the people who came before you.
People who didn’t define themselves by a particular weightlifting discipline,
but instead just lifted and busted their asses and had fun doing it.
People who were perfectly happy to hear your training maxes because they only
competed to prove they were the best, rather than get some worthless trophy or
medal to validate their existence.
The sport of people who would all show up to a competition if someone from
their gym was competing, because it meant that person had a legit shot at
winning– and even if they didn’t we’d descend on a pizza place in a mob after
screaming ourselves hoarse in support of our friends, and bullshit about just
about anything but training while we stuffed ourselves with food.
This is the sport of the dudes who trained outside at Muscle Beach in the 1960s.
This is the sport of Saxon and Goerner and the dudes who trained in their gyms
and trained like goddamn lunatics.
If you don’t want to be awesome, if you don’t want to exhibit the modicum of
personal pride that should prevent you from posting lackluster videos on the
internet and endlessly discussing training minutiae online while skipping
workouts or meals, if you need Fitspo to get into the gym or not fall down
weeping when someone doesn’t tell you how pretty you are in the office one day,
then GET THE FUCK OUT. We don’t want you. We don’t need you. We don’t
like you. We absolutely hate you. We want the goddamn weight stack to fall on
your weepy little head every time we see you in the gym.
Now get out there. I want you to change the world. Don’t think it’ll change
peacefully or you can do it alone. You need to eat the weak. You use the contents
of this book to rip weight rooms apart.
You hunt down the armchair internet form critics, the Fitspo dickheads on
Instagram, the fitness models, the scumbags with GoFundMe pages for
competitions, and the loudmouth natty pussies, the unqualified coaches, the
people who won’t shut up about their goddamn macros, the sensitive. Because
they’re all the same.
And you… you rip their fucking guts out. Drape them on your Christmas tree.
Make a mountain of their skulls in the foyer of your local gym. We need a
cleanse, people. We need a reboot. We need a new chance for all of us.
But I cannot do this work alone. I need you not to suck. Or I will have to break
into your goddamn house and eat you.
Rite of Passage Workouts
Most of the cooler societies in the pre-Christian West and the rest of the pre-
modern world had numerous rituals known as initiation rites, or rite of passage.
These rituals were designed to create a boundary in a person's life between one
stage and another. A trial by fire, as it were, though instead of a Christian witch
hunt, this separated men and women from boys and girls, the married from the
unmarried, the marriageable from the unmarriageable.
For the Taiwanese aborigines, this meant they had to kill a member of a
neighboring tribe and bring back their head. Once the headhunter had returned
successfully, he was able to have his face tattooed, and was then able to get
married.
To be a part of the Zaporozhian Cossacks, the Ukraine’s maniacal mercenary

cowboy/Hun mashup, recruits had to prove their horsemanship, fighting skills,
their ability to shoot and fight from horseback, and had to swim… in addition to
prove their ability to hold their liquor.
One of the craziest initiation rituals is the one the Mawe have for their warriors.
The Mawe engage in little agriculture, so their warriors must be excellent
hunters as well as stone age badasses defending their tribal lands against any and
all comers, including dickheads with guns. Thus, these men must be truly hard
motherfuckers.
To confirm these dudes are harder than nails made from Wolverine’s claws after
getting on the wrong side of Dark Phoenix, they have to undergo an ordeal 20
times beginning when they’re 12. The ordeal? They have to weak a pair of
gloves for five full minutes. No bigs, right? Yeah, except that the gloves have
dozens of bullet ants sewn into them. Bullet ants are inch long harbingers of
jungle doom- the types of ants set on that poor asshole in the Green Inferno after
he has all of his limbs smashed to bits with that massive stone club.
The bite of a single bullet ant can cause hours of pain, paralysis, and
hallucinations, and these kids have to endure five full minutes of repeated bites
by these things… 20 times until they’re considered warriors.
You might think this to be barbarism, but it’s actual evil genius at work. Studies
have shown that when they’re trying to conform to gender stereotypes, pain
thresholds increase concurrently with aggression levels. Thus, when the guys
are expected to endure the pain with the same snarky badassery or Jason
Statham, and they do so, they become more aggressive as a result, and their pain
threshold increases.
What’s that mean for you? Put yourself through hell in the weight room on
occasion and you’ll find you’re that much more a badass in daily life as a result.
Well, provided you’re a guy who conforms to the idea that guys should be
jacked versions of Otis Firefly meets Clint Eastwood meets Ryan Gosling in
Driver . If you’re a woman or an effeminate guy, surround yourself with people
who expect you to be a badass and then be one- you’ll benefit from the
experience.
You’ll notice a bunch of these are CrossFit workouts, because they’re the closest
thing I could find to the workouts I remember tearing me up in high school and
college.
The Baby Steps Workout
This was Tara Chaos’ introductory workout the first day she joined a CrossFit
gym. You’ve gotta crawl before you can walk, and if you’re not elite level fit or
haven’t been a high school wrestler, played varsity football in high school or
college, rowed, boxed, or played another hyper-intense sport that involved
insane levels of muscular endurance and pain tolerance, this might be an
excellent way for you to start.
* Editor’s Note: The Baby Steps Workout sucks no matter WHAT level you are.
Why? Because the more fit you are, the faster you are supposed to make it
through a round. Which means what took me a minute a round (I don’t remember
how many rounds I did, that was an example) should only take you as an
advanced athlete 45 seconds or 30 seconds.
AMRAP in 15 min
5 Pushups
10 Situps
15 Air Squats
Murph
This is a classic CrossFit workout that will test your conditioning on the same
level your missionary skills would get tested at a Christian orgy. Even
conducted without the weight vest, this workout will break your ass if you go
balls out.
For Time
1 mile Run
100 Pullups
200 Pushups
300 Air Squats
1 mile Run
All with a Weight Vest (20/14 lb)
Good time to beat for unpartitioned Murph (athletes typically break up the
exercises into increments of 5, 10, and 15, respectively):
70 min 07 sec – Fitness Level 0 – Beginner athlete
57 min 17 sec – Fitness Level 50 – Average athlete
40 min 37 sec – Fitness Level 90 – Advanced athlete
32 min 34 sec – Fitness Level 98 – Elite athlete
28 min 35 sec – Fitness Level 100 – Regional athlete
DT
Five rounds for time of:
Deadlift - 12 x 155lbs (Same weight men and women)
Hang Power Clean - 9 x 155lbs
Push Jerk - 6 x 155lbs
For this one, a good time to beat is 8 minutes with good time cap of 13 minutes.
Grace
This one looks easy as shit but is fucking gnarly. And if you just feel like going
heavy but don’t have a lot of time, male CrossFitters have gone up to 315 for
this, and Sarah Sigmudsdottir has done Grace with 220. This one is scalable, so
you can basically set yourself on fire like goddamned Buddhist monk in the
Vietnam war with this workout if you want to, and you’ll be out of the gym in a
half hour.
For Time- 30 Clean-and-Jerks (135/95 lb)
Good time to beat for Grace:

L inda aka "3 Bars of Death"
If you are ever short on time and want to get in a quick workout, you’d be hard
pressed to top this. Hell, if you did nothing but this workout every day for a
week, you’d almost definitely look better at the end of the week than you did at
the beginning. The weights are pretty light for an elite lifter, but if you jump on
YouTube, you’ll see powerlifters in great shape getting wrecked by the listed
weights.
10-9-8-7-6-5-4-3-2-1 Reps, For Time
Deadlift (1.5 bodyweight)

Bench Press (bodyweight)
Clean (3/4 bodyweight)
Good time to beat Linda:

Th e Horrifically Painful 30 Minute Overhead
Anyhow Challenge
If memory serves correctly, this was a CrossFit Challenge from around 2008, but
I’ve not been able to find any corroborating source for that claim. Wherever it
came from, this workout left me so goddamned sore that walking was painful for
a week, because the arches of my feet and toes were killing me. Nothing I’ve
done before or since, from high school to college wrestling to insane BUDs-
inspired workouts led by a former SEAL was even half as brutal as this workout.
This is definitely something that you do once in your life and check it off the
list, because even though I’m certain it forces growth and burns fat like crazy,
it’s just too goddamned unpleasant to do on a regular basis.
The Challenge : Get the bar from your shoulders to lockout overhead as many
times as possible in 30 minutes. Jerk it, push jerk it, press it, from the front or
back, for AMRAP in a half hour. 85% of bodyweight for men; 65% for women.
As I recall, I hit 227 reps with 165 when I weighed 180.
Chef Rush and the White House Bicep Routine from

Hell
For those of you who are unaware, a chef who has worked in the White House
since George W. Bush rocks 24” biceps at 45 years of age, and his bicep workout
is the kind of insanity you would expect for that sort of measurement.
In addition to the 2,222 pushups he does every single morning, Chef Andre
Rush trains biceps every 72 hours to ensure that his arms are stretching the tape
at the two foot mark year round.
Before you embark upon this workout, know that even I would approach this
thing with trepidation. If you’re planning on doing it once, make sure you’re not
going to help someone move or a body for a couple of days, because you might
find yourself incapable of lifting whomever has been “disappeared.” If you’re
planning on doing it with regularity, I’d start with two sets of each and work my
way up to the prescribed number of sets. That’s a hell of a lot of bicep work.
Seated Alternating Dumbbell Curl - 5 x 25

Seated Dumbbell Curl (both arms)- 5 x 25 (these are typically done with a
shorter range of motion, quickly, for pump)
Wrist Roller - 5 sets
Standing Cambered Bar Curl (close grip)- 4 x 25
Standing Cambered Bar Curl (wide grip)- 4 x 25

Standing Tri-Set - 4 x 12 reps (do all three exercises with no rest and same
weight)
Alternating Dumbbell Curl.

Crossover Curl (curl each weight up towards your opposite shoulder).
Hammer Curl
Preacher Curl - 4 x 15
Single Arm Cable Cur - Drop set starting at 72lbs and going to the last weight
(you should go lighter)
Steve Michalik’s Intensity and Insanity for Chest,
Shoulders, Arms
While the above pic certainly isn’t the best picture of Michalik I could find, it is
the most hilarious. What you’re seeing is a record album cover for a record in
which Steve Michalik narrates a workout to you, as you do it. On vinyl, because
he even predated cassette tapes.
With that bizarre bit of bodybuilding nostalgia out of the way, Steve Michalik
was a bonafide manic in an era jam-packed to bursting with utter psychopaths.
His gym boasted a front window forever being replaced because he would
throw members who pissed him off through it. He’s chase down people on the
highway in a fit of road rage and beat them and their passengers in the street.
This man was such a maniac that if he was around today he’d have 5150
tattooed across his face, because he and his lifting partners would get so hyped
up that one of them stood in the street convinced he could stop a moving truck
with the power of his physique.
That man did not walk again, as I recall, so let’s avoid hitting those levels of
alternative consciousness, eh? Nevertheless, Michalik was a man genetics his
parents fished out of a Taco Bell dumpster, who built a brutal physique out of
nothing but insane levels of hard work… and although he did use a boatload of
steroids later in his career, began it competing in the first natty bodybuilding
organization on the planet, which had multiple layers of testing to confirm
competitors’ nattiness (in a bygone era, nattiness actually described a well-
dressed man, but we’ll ignore that so the Redditors feel less illiterate).
What follows is not three workouts, nor is it a workout done once a week. This
bugfuck crazy list of exercises was done three times a week, alternated with a
legs and back workout. Prepare for pain.
Chest
Barbell Pullover - 4 x 15 (same weight on each set)
Bench Press - 6 x 10-16 (worked up to 405, and last set is a drop set with three
drops, each one removing 10-15% of the total weight for an AMRAP set)
Decline Press - 6 x 10-16 (worked up to 345, then the drop set)
Incline Press - 6 x 10-16 (worked up to 300, then the drop set)
Shoulders
Seated Press (on machine) - 5 x 10-16 (worked up to 205, then the drop set)
Seated Behind the Neck Press (on machine) - 5 x 10-16 (worked up to 175,
then the drop set)
Lateral Raises - 4 x 10-16 (worked up to 45, then the drop set)
Shrugs - 4 x 10-16 (only worked up to 300, for some reason, then the drop set)
Triceps
Skullcrushers - 6 x 10-16 (worked up to 345, then the drop set)
Seated Cambered Bar Overhead Extensions - 6 x 10-16 (worked up to 150,

then the drop set)
Decline Skullcrushers - 6 x 10-16 (worked up to 150, then the drop set)
Biceps
Single Arm Preacher Curl - 4 x 6 x 10-16 (worked up to 75, then the drop set)
Incline Curl - 4 x 6 x 10-16 (worked up to 85, then the drop set)
Standing Curl - 4 x 6 x 10-16 (all with 120lbs) supersetted with
Preacher Curl - 4 x 6 x 10-16 (all with 110lbs) .

Calves - 15 x 20
Abs
Decline Situps - He did an insane amount of decline situps, starting at the

highest incline, doing as many situps as possible, then lowering it one setting
and repeating until he’s repped out at the lowest setting.
Hanging Leg Raises - 4 x 15-20 supersetted with
Side Bends (with light dumbbell)- 4 x 15-20
Marvin Eder- A Festival of Pain… Er, I Mean Dips
Marvin Eder is one of those old school guys who seems about as much like Paul
Bunyan as a guy into whom you might run in the gym. His lifts were crazy for a
190lb guy- a 515lb flat packed bench press (after having the weight handed to
him), a Steinborn Squat of 550 lbs for 10, 12 one-arm chins, a 337lb competition
overhead clean and press (not a jerk, but a strict press), and a 365lb overhead
press out of the rack, all at a bodyweight of around 190.
Eder’s lifts all predated the influx of steroids into the lifting scene, and Eder’s
disillusionment with the AAU kept him from competing after steroids hit the
scene. Thus, he was a natty bro who could move absolutely insane weights and
recover from crazy intense workouts.
One of Eder’s favorite exercises was the dip- he did them both for reps and
weight, and he did them for insane volumes of work- we’re talking training
sessions that occasionally stretched to seven hours. Even when he was in his
seventies, Eder was still doing dips like a maniac- sets of 5 with 70lbs and sets
of 50 unweighted. So, it shouldn’t come as a shock to see that this is one of
Eder’s workouts:
1000 dips, for time.
Eder managed this in 17 minutes, breaking Jack LaLanne’s record of 20 minutes,

using this method- he and his partner alternated sets of ten dips each until they
had hit a thousand.
Whatchu got?
Bodybuilders
Bodybuilders often get short shrift from strength athletes, who for some reason
think they’re of a better sort, and a different breed. For elite strength athletes,
that is usually a very stupid distinction, however- most of the top bodybuilders
are strong as hell, and there are bodybuilders who have done incredibly well in
strength sports without any sport-specific training, simply because they’re used
to moving a ton of weight over a lot of different planes of movement. Don’t
believe me? Watch some Strength Wars on YouTube- the bodybuilders routinely
wreck shop against powerlifters and strongmen.
In short- all that shit you’ve talked about bodybuilders in the past? Time to put
it to bed. Hell, Chris Bumstead, runner up to the Physique Olympia, likely
benches more than you- in one random video he benches 315 with insanely strict
form for 16 reps on his fourth set. So stuff that shit and keep an open mind.
Lee Priest: Demigod-Level Arm Training
Lee Priest is one of the greatest bodybuilders never crowned Mr. Olympia- he
had the misfortune to compete under the reigns of Dorian Yates and Ronnie
Coleman, neither of whom could be unseated in their prime. Standing at 5’4”
and 235lbs, he carried far more muscle on his frame per inch than any other
competitors of the time, but even in his insane condition and the density of a
black hole, it was not enough to unseat Yates.
Regardless, Priest’s arms stand as one of the most impressive pairs to ever have
taken the Olympia stage, from both a mass and shape perspective. From his
wrists to his musclebound armpits, Priest was absolutely untouchable. To hit the
stage that way, Priest trained his arms once a week, on the last training day of the
week- Friday, though tis canned-ham forearms were trained with back, on
Tuesday. With that setup, Priest hit his least taxing bodypart the day before a
weekend layoff, and his ridiculously large appendages were able to recover
sufficiently for heavy back, chest, and shoulder work the following week .
Upper Arms
Dumbbell Concentration Curl - 5 x 6-8
Barbell Curl - 7 x 6-8

Alternate Dumbbell Curl - 5 x 6-8
Cambered-Bar Preacher Curl - 5 x 6-8

superset with Underhand Pullups - 5 x AMRAP
Dumbbell Preacher Curl - 5 x 6-8

Close-Grip Bench Presses - 7 x 6-8
Two-Arm Dumbbell Extensions- 5 x 6-8
Skullcrushers - 5 x 6-8
V-Bar Cable Pushdowns - 5 x 6-8

superset with Dips - 5 x AMRAP
Seated French Presses - 5 6-8
One-Arm Dumbbell Extensions - 3 x 6-8

Forearms
Alternate Dumbbell Hammer Curl - 5 x 8-10

Barbell Wrist Curl - 5 x 25+
Dumbbell Wrist Curl - 5 x 25+
Cambered-Bar Reverse Curl - 5 x 25

Freddy Ortiz: Add a Couple Reps? How About You
Add Some Sets to Grow.
Freddy Ortiz was the first of the bodybuilding “giant killers.” At only 5’5”
193lbs and arms a hair under 21 inches when pumped, Ortiz was truly a
goddamned beast onstage in the late 1950s. And possibly a slightly drunken
beast, at that, as he was known for pouring shots of whiskey like a goddamned
baller backstage at shows.
Ortiz’s methods for training were high volume and unique in that he was not
obsessed with putting more weight on the bar at each workout. Instead, he tried
to keep the same workout every time, using the same weight. When he could,
he’d increase the number of sets from five to six, and only when he could get all
the reps in his sixth set would he increase the poundage. And lest you think
Ortiz only trained for reps and never maxed out, think again- guys in the pre-
internet era were constantly competing with one another, and no one was so
wedded to a stupid program that they refused to test their maxes on a regular
basis.
Ortiz’s best bodyparts were, by far and away, his chest and his arms. Though he
trained chest three times a week, he figured the ancillary work his arms got
training the rest of his upper body were sufficient to keep them huge, especially
since he trained all of his upper body three times a week. All the sets listed
below are done with roughly 75% of his 1RM, putting him at failure around the
last couple of reps of his last set.
Chest
Bench Press- 5 x 10
Incline Dumbbell Bench Press - 5 x 10

Flat Bench Flyes - 5 x 10
Straight-Arm Pullover - 5 x 10
Dips - 5 x AMRAP
Arms
Barbell Curl - 5 x 10
Seated Alternate Dumbbell Curl - 5 x 10
Close Grip Barbell Curl - 5 x 10
Concentration Pulley Curl - 5 x 10
Barbell Overhead Extensions - 4 x 8
Standing Triceps Extension (Close Grip)- 4 x 8

Pushdowns - 4 x 8
Overhead Tricep Extensions - 4 x 8
Brutally In-Depth: John DeFendis’ Intensity or

Insanity Routine
When people think old-school training, this is the guy they're thinking about.
"Oh, 5x5"" You ask?" Hell no, not even Reg Park himself trained like that- that
was a goddamned beginner's workout. That full-body three days a week
horseshit you've been peddled was even more fanciful than Saddam's WMDs,
Justin Bieber's impression of his own fighting prowess, and the belief that
female ejaculate is just piss (pro tip, no one's piss tastes that bitter)- the badasses
of yore trained hard, heavy, and often.
John DeFendis came up in the 1970s, when training was all about crushing
weights for endless sets, running around screaming like and asshole and bitch-
slapping anyone dumb enough to get in their goddamn way. The entire concept
of abbreviated training was as foreign to them as a clitoris to a male Redditor-
they figured since some was good and more was better, a hell of a lot would
yield insane results... and results they got.
Contrary to the speculation of endless droves of weak-willed internet pussies,

this was not a mindset created by drugs, and a workout only survived through
the consumption of copious amounts of anabolics- this was the way everyone
trained, because they didn't suck at life.
Yeah, drugs played a role- the gym in which DeFendis trained had a massive
sign over the door that read, "Message of the Day: Up the Dosage!"
Nevertheless, people in the 70s trained like this irrespective of their anabolic and
amphetamine regimen- it was just the way physiques were forged, rather than
tailored. This is why people at that time who lifted weights never had to answer
the question of whether or not they lifted, because the answer was pretty
goddamn obvious.
Vital Stats
Born : 1958
Height : 5'8"
Weight : 225 lbs-245lbs. (though he weighs a lean 260 these days)
Titles Won
● 1977 AAU Mr. New York City

● 1978 AAU Mr. Atlantic USA (Teen)
● 1979 NPC Mr. North Eastern America
● 1980 NPC USA Runner Up
● 1980 NPC Eastern America
● 1983 NPC Western America Championships
● 1988 NPC Eastern America
1988 NPC USA ChampionshipsPerhaps the best part about his story is that
DeFendis wasn't jacked at 16 like Dorian or Arnold- he was 5' and 100lbs at the
age of 13. His brother, as brothers will do, spent his free time kicking the shit out
of DeFendis and forcing John to spend his allowance on ice cream as a bribe to
stave off more ass kickings. After picking up a bodybuilding magazine featuring
Dave Draper, DeFendis started going ham in the gym in an effort to build a
physique that would make his brother think twice.
Six years later, after busting his ass working 60 hours a week in his brother's deli
and slaughtering upper body day after day, DeFendis stepped onstage at 168lbs...
and came in dead last. According to DeFendis, not even board shorts would have
helped him- he'd have had to have competed in jeans to have been anything other
than a complete laughingstock.
After losing his first few contests, DeFendis decided to train with Steve
Michalik, the local bodybuilding guru and lunatic, and found himself in the
hospital within a week.
"Steve put me on a very vigorous training program. I had let myself run
down and I contracted a very bad strep/tonsillitis infection. I've
had problems with this in the past, but this time my throat closed
completely. I was running a 104 degree temperature, and was
hospitalized for two weeks in mid-December. I went into the
hospital at 204 pounds, looking pretty decent. I got out two days
before Christmas at 184, smooth, and looking like 'poppin fresh
dough.' I figured my chances were over.
"I went back to training in my basement. I had eight weeks for the Mets,
but there was also another contest at the end of January - the
Teenage Suburban. I wanted to enter it, but 10 days before the
contest my temperature shot up, my throat closed, and I was back
in the hospital.
Taking these contests meant a lot to me and I did not want to blow them. I
called up Tony Pandolfo and he told me to keep pumping and
flexing all my bodyparts whenever I could to keep up the muscle
tone. I was doing 500 situps a day with the intravenous needle still
in my arm. It popped out two or three times and the nurses had to
re-jab me. It was painful but I wanted to win. The doctors thought
I was crazy, but they helped me as best as they could.”
Though he managed a decent showing at the Juniors show on which he'd had his
sights set, he continued to get his ass kicked inside out at every other show he
entered, at least until he re-enlisted the help of the king of the assholes, Steve
Michalik. Though Michalik was renowned for throwing dudes through the front
window of his own gym, chasing down motorists and beating them down in the
street, and other assorted violent insanity, DeFendis fully credits Michalik with
his success onstage.
"My whole body was smooth and small when I returned to training, but in
one month's time it began to change. I was getting bigger and
more muscular. The change was incredible. Each day I trained
under Steve I learned something new. In fact, I am still learning.
Just a turn of the wrist, or bending your knees a little can make
a big difference and give a different tension and movement .
"I believe that Steve Michalik is the greatest person to train under
because he is a perfectionist, like me. I'm never entirely happy
with myself, and I guess that's what leads you to greatness. It's the
guys that are too happy or contented with themselves that stop
growing."
And lest you fall into the trap of thinking that what you're about to read held
back DeFendis' progress, as the wunderkinds on Getbig and Bodybuilding.com
seem to think, think again. DeFendis had at this point tried three days a week,
five, and six, going up to a completely reasonable 18-20 sets per bodypart, but
he was not seeing the success he wanted. The hyper-extreme methods of
Michalik were exactly what DeFendis' body needed.
"I had next planned to enter the AAU Apollo in October and had begun
training intensively eight weeks earlier. I was doing 40-60 sets per
bodypart, training 6 days a week, maintaining a strict diet, and
taking in plenty of vitamin and mineral supplements. I was really
looking good within three weeks, so I decided to enter the AAU
Gotham on September 16th. If all went well it was my plan to hit
the AAU Region 1 the next day.
Steve drove me into the ground. I'd train at seven in the morning (for
about three hours), go home, and then be in a coma for the next
six hours. After that there was work. It was very tough. I would do
arms, then legs. He would rush me to the nearby track where he'd
start screaming at me until I completed my laps. There was no way
I was going to slow down because he's a madman, but also I knew
he was busting his ass for me."
To DeFendis, winning was all, and he didn't care what the cost was. Like Ted
Arcidi, when he was training to utterly mangle the world record in the bench
press, training was the end all, be all, and DeFendis let nothing whatsoever stand
in his goddamn path.
"I lived to train, eat and sleep and I worked enough to afford all of life’s
luxuries which consisted of a 1972 Chevy Vega with no front end,
an endless supply of chicken, a basement apartment with a
mattress on the floor, and a cupboard full of vitamins. But looking
back now, I realize the meaning of the phrase, “Happier than a
pig in shit.” My lifestyle would have been misery to most, but to
me, I was on top of the world. I was doing what I wanted to do
and I was skyrocketing towards my goal.
It didn’t matter to me that I was waking up at 5:00 in the morning to eat

egg whites so that I could be at the gym by 6:30, and it didn’t
matter that I was dragged through the last half of the workout like
the gladiator in the chariot scene from “Ben Hur.” What did
matter was the fact that I was training with Mr. America and that
even though he was mentally and physically beating the living
sh*t out of me day after day, I was improving dramatically.
My 18″ biceps were now well over 20″ and the peaks were getting higher
by the hour. Dumbbells that I had once used for heavy incline
presses were now my warm-up weights for exercises like dumbbell
Curl and lateral rises. “Intensity or Insanity Training” was as
routine, like breakfast in the morning. Every time someone said
that we couldn’t do something, it inspired us to try it anyway. 50
sets of heavy barbell Curl? Been there. 30 sets of squats. 500
pound inclines. 100 pound dumbbell Curl. 90 pound dumbbell
laterals. 60 set back workouts."
Intensity or Insanity Training
It was in Michalik's gym that he and Defendis put the finishing touches on what
has since been regarded as the benchmark for weight room lunacy. Like most
people who actually enjoy training and don't regard it with the modern
enthusiasm of a Soviet factory worker, they had no set program: split the routine
into two parts- legs and back the first day and chest, shoulders, and arms on the
next day. Calves and abs are worked at every training session. Train two days in
a row and rest the third day, though abs and calves are done six days a week.
Though his workouts were never the same week to week, DeFendis' training
looked something like this- a two day split of chest/back/biceps on day one and
delts/legs/triceps on the second. Every single set was done to failure and beyond-
though they're out of vogue these days, DeFendis and Michalik used a
combination of forced reps, supersets, negatives, drop sets, and rest-pause in
order to increase the intensity and force greater growth.
"Our lives could have been characterized by the quote made famous by
Walter Gagehot, 'A great pleasure in life is doing what people say
you cannot do'"
D ay One
Chest - 45 sets total, 5 sets per exercise. Increase weight on each set,
starting with 15-20 and ending at 4-6.
Cable Crossover
Dumbbell Flyes
Pec Deck
Incline Bench Press
Flat Bench to Neck

Decline Bench Press
Single Arm Alternate Cable Pullover
Dumbbell Pullover
Dumbbell Incline Flyes
Back - 55 sets total, 5 sets per exercise.
Cable Pulldown to Front on Angle
Cable Pulldown to Back

Cable Pulldown to Chest
Seated Cable Row (straps)

Reverse Grip Pulldown
Seated Cable Row (different handle)

Standing Straight Arm Pulldown (close grip)
Pulldown Machine (wide grip bar)

Nautilus Pullover
Cable Rear Laterals (bent over)
Bent Over Barbell Row
Biceps- 40 sets total, 5 per exercise.
Single Arm DB Preacher Curl
superset with One Arm Dumbbell Curl
Standing Barbell Curl

superset with Barbell Concentration Curl
Cable Curl (seated on floor)
Machine Preacher Curl
superset with Nautilus Machine Curl
Lying Down Pulley Concentration Curl
Day Two
Shoulders- 55 sets total, 5 per exercise. Increase weight on each set,

starting with 15-20 and ending at 4-6.
Nautilus Lateral Raise Machine

Dumbbell Lateral Pulley Laterals on Cable Crossover
Barbell Behind the Neck Press (pyramid up to 150 lbs.)

Barbell Behind the Neck Press (150 x 5 sets)
Nautilus Behind the Neck Press
Nautilus Rear Deltoid

Dumbbell Rear Lateral (flat bench)
Pulley Rear Lateral
Shrugs (in front)

Shrugs (behind body)
Triceps- 45 sets, 5 per exercise
Triceps Pushdowns (angle bar)
Triceps Pushdowns (straight bar)
Triceps Pushdowns (Nautilus Close Grip)
Cable French Press
Single Arm Cable Pushdown (top setting of crossover machine)
Cable Kickback (bottom of crossover machine)

Close Grip Dips
Wide Grip Dips

Reverse Grip Cable Tricep Dip
Legs - 45 sets, 5 per exercise
Leg Curl
Leg Extensions (Nautilus Multi-Leg)
Leg Extensions (Nautilus Extension)
Leg Extensions (Leg Extension Table)

Leg Press (toes straight)
Leg Press (toes pointing out)
Paused Smith Machine Squat (2 second pause at bottom)

Machine Hack squats
Regular Squats
Run - total of 1.5 miles, within 15 minutes after squatting. Jog 2 laps, sprint 1
lap, rest 30 seconds, repeat 3 times.
Michalik and Defendis became famous for ultra-heavy training filled with insane
amounts of intensity multipliers that involved 40, 50, and even 75 set-per-
bodypart workouts. They would rope off their area in the gym, scream at anyone
who came near, and wreak havoc therein.
"Michalik struts across the gym floor with a set of 60 pounders for incline
Flyes. I know the routine. Three benches, three exercises, all sets
to failure. Nonstop ass-kicking supersets. Steve begins with almost
300 pounds on the incline Smith machine. He then proceeds to the
second bench to complete a set of incline Flyes, and finally,
pullovers across the last bench with a 100 pound dumbbell."
Between them, Michalik and DeFendis sent more people to the hospital than
AIDS and cancer combined. DeFendis himself spent a weekend in the hospital
after his first week of training with Michalik, and they felt that it was a measure
of a true man to cowboy up and return to Michalik's den of pain for a second go
at greatness after a quick trip to the ER with rhabdo. Shitting blood didn't stop
these maniacs- they were hardcore to a level of extremity that only the
desperately mentally ill and the insanely driven reach. The best part about it?
They laughed at the guys in the hospital and went around telling other gym
members that the dude they just hospitalized was mentally weak, and might as
well take up badminton or croquet.
Diet
DeFendis' diet was just as extreme as his training, and frankly it astonishes me
that he was able to train on it. Or eat all of it. Designed by a trainer and
physician named Bob Guskin, who also trained 1984 Mr. Universe John
Hnatyschak (trainers at that time were hardly the celebrities they are now, so it
was a goddamn miracle I could dig this up from a 35 year old Ukrainian
newspaper), DeFendis' diet consisted of
"Eight pounds of chicken a day. I wish I had Frank Purdue as a relative!

Six weeks on broiled chicken breasts with diet soda and
supplements, and then two more on boiled chicken and
supplements, this time minus everything but water. My only
consumption was one-half cantaloupe after training. My energy
was low, but this program did the trick. Like Vince Lombardi said,
Winning isn't everything- it's the only thing. If you can shrug off a
loss, you can never be a winner."
Since retiring, DeFendis has trained everyone from pro baseball star Mike Piazza
to politicians like Newt Gingrich, pro boxer Andrew "I will punch you dead in
the nuts repeatedly" Golata, and clothing designer Calvin Klein., in addition to
countless regular people, many of whom he's helped lose over 100 pounds and
build respectable physiques out of what began as a pile of curdled mayo. He's
also a WBBG Hall of Fame inductee, an International Fitness Hall of Fame
inductee along with fitness superstars Arnold Schwarzenegger and Jack Lalanne,
and was “Trainer of the Year” for nine consecutive years for the state of Florida.
And if you think he uses a different method with then, think again- he trains
them just as balls out as he trains himself. "Intensity or Insanity Training is great
for everyone if they wish to eat perfectly, train hard and get enough rest and
recovery. It just has to be applied correctly with each individual's condition and
goals in mind. If one variable is off, then they will not succeed."
In other words, if you want sick results fast, train as heavy as humanly possible,
moving as fast as possible through your workouts. Heavy supersets and drop sets
should be the name of the game.
The fact that Michalik and DeFendis lived through these projectile-vomit
inducing workouts, much less thrived and grew on them is a testament to the
human spirit and the ability of the human physical form to adapt to any and all
stress and thrive. After reading about these workouts, I'm embarrassed at the
way I half-ass it through the gym, because if DeFendis' story tells us one thing,
it's that we could all be going far harder in the gym.
Bob Birdsong- If Overtraining Was a Legitimate
Concern, His Corpse Would Extra Dead… and His
Forearms Would be Tiny (But He’s Alive and Well)
An adage coined by the Barbarian Brothers but apparently held to be true by

everyone in the 1980s was that “there is no such thing as overtraining- just
undereating and undersleeping.” No one seems to have believed this more than
Bob Birdsong, who trained like his perpetual motion and gym presence would
prevent the Christian Armageddon he was endlessly yammering on about.
Seriously, Bob Birdsong trained more than most teenagers in an empty house
masturbate, and was forever looking for ways to increase his training volume.
At 5’8” and 215lbs in the pre-GH and insulin era he wasn’t a mass monster, but
he was certainly no Frank Zane, either, and he stayed in contest ready condition
year round. Nor was he weak- when you trained at Gold’s Venice in those days,
you had to look the part and be able to move serious weight. So whatever you
think about this routine, don’t bother thinking it won’t work, because that wasn’t
an option for Bob Birdsong.
Bob Birdsong’s Six Day a Week Forearm Routine
This was done after his upper arm workouts, which were done six days a week,
with very, very short rests and tons of forced reps.
Barbell Wrist Curl - 5 x 15
Reverse Wrist Curl - 5 x 15
One Arm Dumbbell Wrist Curl - 5 x 15
Tuesday / Thursday
Barbell Wrist Curl - 5 x 15

Behind the Back Standing Barbell Wrist Curl - 5 x 15
Rob Colacino: Psycho-Burst Training
Rob Colacino might stand as the greatest monument to Generation X the world
has ever seen. Standing 5’9” and 245lbs, this man was a favorite of Ironman
magazine in the 1990’s for his insanely abbreviated, and incredibly painful,
training style. You might think, in the modern era, that something with a name
as hyperbolic as “Psycho-Burst Training” would be a bunch of bullshit. In many
cases, you’re likely right, but every now and again something lives up to its
hype. Whether or not Colacino was simply a “juice monkey” as the internet
likes to posit, his training style does illustrate how many different ways there are
to skin a cat,
Colacino took the Arthur Jones’ Heavy Duty System and chopped it down even
further, to the point that he didn’t train more than about two hours a week, going
until he practically dropped dead on each set, and pointing to the definite utility
of ultra-slow training, even if it is not considered to be the ultimate in training
that it used to be.
He trained trained one of two ways- either each bodypart once a week on its own
day, or the entire body in one workout, using only incline bench press to cover
both shoulders and chest instead of laterals and flat bench, every other day.
Either way, he did each set to total failure, which meant that if he couldn’t get a
full rep, he would have his partner assist him with the concentric portion and do
ultra-slow negatives, then do tiny partial reps until he could not budge the bar an
inch.
Like I said, sometimes the product lives up to its ridiculously hyperbolic name,
and this is one of those times.
Chest
Partner Assisted Bench Press - Warmup, then 1 x 1

Colacino did these fairly heavy, with perhaps 80% of his one rep max. The
performance of this rep is best described by the Psycho-In-Chief himself:
‘Grab the weight bring it down on the negative part of the exercise very slow.
Touch the chest, bring it up. Stop ¾ of the way up hold it there. I count
to 50 in my head. Not a normal 50, but a fast 50. I might go more or less
than that, it depends on how you feel that day. Bring it up slowly after you
do the ¾ rep holding it. Bring it up slow, slow, inch it up until you are
contracted all the way. Hold it there locked out for as long as you can,
then lower it back down on the negative part of it. Stop ¾ of the way, hold
it there.
Again count to 50 in your head (more than that or less than that, just do your best
to hold it there). Bring it down slowly, slowly, slowly. To about ½ way
maybe less than ½ way. Stop there. This is where it really gets tough. You
hold it there for as long as you can, then it lower it slowly, slowly, slowly
down too touch your chest.
Now this is where it gets very important. From there, you try to bring the bar
back up. You tell the spotters to leave you alone. Make sure they know
before the set to leave you alone. You tell them when you are dead – when
to take the bar from you. You push the weight off your chest. I don’t care
if it doesn’t even go off your chest just contract, contract, contract, you
push, you push. Your try to get another rep as hard as you can. You don’t
stop until you feel you are dead. And then you say ‘Take that damn weight
away from me.’”
Incline Bench Press - Warmup very well, then 1 x 1 with the same method as
the flat bench.
Back
Barbell Rows supersetted with Chins - 4 x 6
For Barbell Rows : With regular rep pace, bring the bar to sternum and
then descend halfway. At the halfway point, hold it as long as possible,
then lower the bar as slowly as possible. Immediately repeat. On the 5th
and 6th reps, you can rest at full extension for 2 seconds before beginning
the next set.
For Chins : Hold at the ½ point and the ¾ point for as long as possible for
the first four reps. On the last two reps, hold at the top as long as possible,
then lower to the ½ and ¾. On the fourth set, add in as many bottom
position quarter reps as possible, going to complete failure. Yeah, you
might look like a fish being electrrocuted while hanging from the bar, but
you’re forcing growth.
Shoulders
Dumbbell Laterals - Warmup, 1 x 6
Static holds at the top and halfway point on all six reps, then as many of the tiny
partials at the bottom as you can get.
Shrug Machine - 4 x 6
Hold the last rep at the top as long as humanly possible on each set.
Arms
Standing Alternating Dumbbell Curl - Warmup, 1 x 6
Normal pace concentric rep to the top, lower to halfway, hold as long as
possible, then slow to the bottom.
Seated Alternating Dumbbell Curl - Warmup, 1 x 6 (same form as standing)

Nautilus Mutli-Bicep Machine - Warmup, then 1 x 1
Normal speed rep to the top, hold as long as possible, lower to the halfway point,
hold as long as possible, then finish with tiny reps at full extension. This rep
should take about two minutes if done correctly.
Rope Pushdown - Warmup, 1 x 6

Normal pace concentric rep to the bottom, lower to halfway, hold as long as
possible, then slow to the top. On the last rep, do as many tiny bouncing reps as
possible.
Overhead Rope Extension - Warmup, 1 x 6
Normal pace concentric rep to the top, lower to halfway, hold as long as
possible, then slow to the bottom. On the last rep, do as many tiny bouncing
reps as possible.
Nautilus Multi-Tricep - Warmup, then 1 x 1
Same method as the biceps.
Legs
Hack squats - 1-10 method (you’ll have to experiment with this to find the
appropriate weight, but 40-50% 1RM should be doable).
Do a couple of warmup sets and prepare for pain- bar stays on your back the
entire time… no reracking, bro.
With working weight:
Do 1 rep, rest 5 seconds
Do 2 reps, rest 5 seconds




Then quarter reps from the bottom until you cannot move the weight (and are
likely considering calling 911).
Leg Curl - 1 x 6
Hold at the ½ point and the ¾ point for as long as possible for the first four reps.
On the last two reps, hold at the top as long as possible, then lower to the ½ and
¾. When you can’t do another full rep, do "little rocking reps" of an inch or two
at full extension until you literally cannot move the weight (up to 100, bro- don’t
quit at ten)
Donkey Calf Raise - Run the stack.

This is just insane. Start at the heaviest weight, do as many reps as possible,
drop one plate, and repeat. Until you’ve done the stack, and do bouncing reps on
the last plate to scorch whatever is left of your calves. Forget walking home.
Harold Poole: The Full Body Bloodbath of the First
Black Mr. America
Few people today mention the name Harold Poole when discussing the greats in
bodybuilding, but they should, Boasting some of the biggest traps the
bodybuilding world had ever seen, Poole was a party animal who bounced and
sold a bit of weed at night and trained during the day, becoming the first black
(although he was actually German, black, and Native American) Mr. America.
To give you some conception of how prestigious that was, the Mr. America was
the longest running bodybuilding title at the time and was held in the same
esteem the Mr. O is now.
Though Poole, who was known for having a thick and brutal physique with some
of the biggest shoulders ever seen onstage, eventually switched to a bodypart
system, his original program was a three to four times a week full body program.
The following is the program that allowed him to become the first ever black
Mr. America, which at the time was the most prestigious bodybuilding title in
the world.
When Poole first began lifting at age 12, he did this routine with five sets of
fifteen reps on each exercise. As he grew older, he increased the weights and
decreased the reps. As with most of these guys, their workouts varied on how
they were feeling, the people with whom they were training, and the time they
had to devote to training, so don’t feel like the number of sets or reps is
absolutely set in stone.
Full Body Routine, Done 3-4x a Week
Barbell Behind the Neck Press - 2 x 4-6; 1 x 2-4
Barbell Bench Press (Wide grip) - 3 x 4-6
Barbell Row - 3 x 6
Behind Neck Pullups - 3 x AMRAP
Cheating Barbell Curl - 3 x 4-6
Triceps Kickbacks - 5 x 6
Front Squat - 3 x 4-6
Donkey Calf Raise - 6 x 6
Situps to failure
Lifting is not just about counting reps or seconds, timing micros, taking
pills.
Lifting is about being the best you can be, and savoring your road to the
goal.
- Harold Poole
Dorian Yates: Blood and Guts
Dorian Yates revolutionized the bodybuilding physique, putting a hard line

between the bodybuilders of yore and the modern era. Whereas all of the
previous champions had been able to be compared to one another more or less
equally, Yates changed the look of bodybuilding and really defined the line
between the old and the new. At 5’10” 267lbs, Yates was fully 20 pounds
heavier than his predecessor at roughly the same height, and his conditioning
was so much more intense, his skin so much thinner, and his body so much
harder, that Dorian literally looked like he was chiseled out of goddamn stone.
More than anything, however, his training set him apart from everyone else.
Where bodybuilders before him had trained as much as twice a day, six days a
week, Yates’ method was intended to compress all of that work into four short
workouts. Yates used intensity multipliers- shit like drop sets, forced reps, slow
negatives with an assist back to the start of the movement and partials to ensure
he squeezed every last bit of muscular effort out of his muscles that he possibly
could. Clearly, you should all know what drop sets and forced reps are, and if
you don’t, google them. The TLDR is that he did as much as possible to make
as little apparent work hit his musculature like it was a hell of a lot of volume,
and that forced serious growth.
Day 1- Delts, Traps, Triceps, Abs
Smith Machine Overhead Press -1 x 12-15*, 1 x 8-10
Seated Lateral Raise - 1 x 10*; 1 x 6-8
Unilateral Cable Lateral Raise - 1 x 8-10
Dumbbell Shrug - 1 x 12*; 1 x 8-10

Tricep Pushdowns - 2 x 10-12*; 1 x 6-8
Crunches - 3 x 20-25
Reverse Crunches - 3 x 12-15
* Indicates warmup set
Day 2- Back, Rear Delts
Dumbbell Pullover - *2 x 10-12; 1 x 8-10
Hammer Pulldowns - *2 x 10-12; 1 x 8-10

Reverse-Grip Hammer Pulldown - *1 x 10-12; 1 x 8-10
One-Arm Dumbbell Row - *1 x 10-12; 1 x 8-10
Wide-Grip Seated Cable Row - *1 x 10-12; 1 x 8-10
Barbell Deadlift - *1 x 10-12; 1 x 8-10
Hyperextension - 1 x 8-10
Day 4- Chest and Biceps
Incline Barbell Bench Press - *2 x 10-12; 1 x 8-10
Machine Chest Press - *2 x 10-12; 1 x 8-10
Decline Bench Press - *2 x 10-12; 1 x 8-10
Incline Dumbbell Flyes (45 degrees) - *2 x 10-12; 1 x 8-10

Flat Bench Dumbbell Flyes - *2 x 10-12; 1 x 8-10
Cable Crossover - *2 x 10-12; 1 x 8-10
Incline Dumbbell Biceps Curl - *2 x 10-12; 1 x 8-10
Standing EZ Bar Biceps Curl - *2 x 10-12; 1 x 8-10
Machine Preacher Curl - *1 x 10-12; 1 x 8-10
Day 6- Legs
Leg Extensions - *2 x 12-14; 1 x 10-12

Leg Press - *2 x 12-14; 1 x 10-12
Hack squats - *2 x 12-14; 1 x 10-12
Seated Hamstring Curl - *2 x 12-14; 1 x 10-12

5-minute break
Stiff-Legged Deadlift - *1 x 10-12; 1 x 10-12
Calf Press - *1 x 10-12; 1 x 10-12

Seated Calf Raise - *1 x 10-12; 1 x 6-8 (Done in rest-pause fashion, with three
rests until complete failure)
Jeff King: Train Legs Twice a Week and Get Twice

the Gainz
Meet Jeff King, a bodybuilder who was, in his prime, considered to be an

uncrowned Mr. Olympia even as an amateur. He had quads as big and detailed as
Tom Platz with an upper body to match, and the biggest, most vascular neck
anyone’s ever seen.

He apparently dropped out of bodybuilding due to the politics of the sport, and
as such we never got to see the best of him. That’s pretty horrifying, given the
fact that Jeff King would likely have produced a physique that would never be
replicated, and might have rivalled Ronnie Coleman for strength at his peak. In
the picture above, for instance, King is only 22 years old and 230lbs.- as such,
he'd have another 20 years to pack on mass and gain muscle maturity if his
career lasted as long as Ronnie Coleman.
In the off-season, King’s training differed somewhat from in-season, though he’d
stick with the same basic exercises and just not push as hard.
His split was a pretty basic three days on, one day off split that was repeated ad
infinitum or until he just got bored and did something else.
Day One - Chest, Back, Abs, and Neck
Day Two - Legs, Calves

Day Three - Shoulders, Biceps, Triceps, Abs, and Neck
Day Four - Off
Off Season Leg Training

Front Squat - 3 x 8
Duck Leg Press (popular in the 80s, you’d place your feet so your heels were
nearly touching and your toes pointed out at roughly 45 degrees)- 4 x 8
Hack squats - 3 x 8
Leg Curl - 4 x 10
Standing Leg Curl - 2 x 10
Standing Calf Raise - 3-4 x 15-20

Calf Press - 3 x 12-15
“Powerlifting” Squat Routine
Back Squats - Warmups: 1 x 12; 1 x 12; 1 x 10; 1 x 8; 405 x 6, 495 x 4, 495 x 4

Duck Leg Press - 1 x 10; 1 x 8; 1 x 6; 1 x 4 (Drastically increase the weight on
every set)
Leg Curl - 3 x 10
Leo Stern: An Old School Two Day Split for Strength
and Mass
The bodybuilding purists among you will recognize the name Leo Stern, of the
famous old school destination gym Stern’s Gym in San Diego, CA. If you’ve
not been and want to see a piece of bodybuilding history, I highly recommend it-
I trained there on and off when I lived in San Diego in 2001. It’s a no frills
place that was owned during his life by Leo Stern, a bodybuilder and odd lifter
who was a seminal thinker and trainer in the first half of the 20th century who
competed yearly in the Mr. America but was always edged out by big names like
John Grimek and George Eiferman.
Leo Stern was also impressive for having benched 371lbs in an odd lifts
competition around 1950 but was disqualified for having a slight back arch (at
that point a legal bench press could only be done with a completely flat back).
His competition bonafides aside, Stern’s real claim to fame was having coached
the guy pictured above, Bill Pearl, to greatness. Though Bill Pearl likely would
have risen to greatness no matter what, Stern’s tutelage definitely benefited Pearl
in his formative years, and Stern’s workout created the base from which Bill
Pearl went on to be named the Best Built Man of the century and five time Mr.
Universe, beating luminaries like Frank Zane, Sergio Oliva, Reg Park, and a
young Sean Connery (yeah, 007 was a bodybuilder back in the day).
Days 1, 3, and 5
Behind the Neck Pullup - 4 x 15
Dumbbell Pullover - 2 x 10
Bench Press - 3 x 10 (increasing the weight on the third set)
One Arm Row - 3 x 10
Rear Laterals - 3 x 10 (increase the weight each set)

Laterals - 2 x 10
Dumbbell Flyes - 2 x 10
Military Press - 2 x 10
Triceps Kickbacks - 3 x 10
Dumbbell Curl to Press -3 x 10
Triceps Extensions -3 x 10
Situps - 300 reps
Leg Raises - 300 reps

Days 2,4, and 6
Dumbbell Swings - 1 x 10 (for a warmup)
Bent Over Row - 3 x 10
Pulldowns - 3 x 10
Behind the Neck Press - 3 x 10

Breathing Squat - 1 x 15
Straight Arm Pullover - 1 x 10
Breathing Squat - 1 x 15 (ten pounds heavier than the first set)
Breathing Squat - 1 x 15 (ten pounds heavier than the last set)
Hack squats Machine - 3 x 10

Leg curl three sets 20 reps. 70 pounds
Leg Extensions five sets 12 reps 15 pounds

Rise-on-toes, standing three sets 30 reps. 200 pounds
Rise-on-toes, seated three sets 30 reps 245 pounds

Situps 300 reps.
Leg raises 300 reps.
Breathing Squat - Load the bar, get under it, and walk out with it. Take a few
deep breaths (really deep), then squat to parallel. Return to the start position and
take another few deep breaths before doing another rep. The reason for this is
that it causes your upper body to work hard as hell to take those huge breaths,
which in turn adds muscularity to your physique. Old school lifters swore by
these, but they've fallen out of fashion because we're all pussies and these
absolutely suck to do.
Scott Wilson
Given that Wilson's volume was likely triple or quintuple your own, you might
be thinking he was weak as a kitten as a result. On the contrary, Wilson
managed a near elite powerlifting total of 1760 with a 625 squat, 470 bench, and
665 deadlift (the AAU elite total was 1825) after doing a meet on a whim in his
bodybuilding off-season (and I realize there are heavier totals attributed to Scott,
but they were ridiculous poundages and utterly lacked citations). Thus, at 5'10",
215lbs, and rocking 20" arms and a 24" unpumped shoulder width measurement,
Scott Wilson was officially a bad motherfucker in any gym or bodybuilding
competition he entered.
Back Routine 2-3x a Week

Deadlift : 5 x 5 reps
Bent Barbell Row : 5 x 6-8 reps
T-Bar Row : 5 x 6-8 reps

Behind the Neck Pulldown : 5 x 8 reps
One Arm Dumbbell Row : 5 x 8 reps
Barbell Shrug : 5 x 8 reps

Upright Row : 5 x 8 reps
John McWilliams: 20” Muscular Arms in the Pre-
Steroid Era Prove it is Possible to Do Without Gear
John McWilliams rocked the first recorded cold-measured 20" muscular arms,
which likely stretched to over 21” when he had a pump on. Though he would be
a pariah in your local “hardcore” gym for skipping leg day, he was also one of
the first people in history to bench press over 500 pounds, and he pulled 710 at a
time when hardly anyone was hitting 700. He pulled that off at a bodyweight of
220 (which would have been 240 if he’d ever bothered to squat), and even
rocked 19.25” arms when he dieted down to 186 for shits and giggles.
Not only was McWilliams more impressive in the gym and on the platform than
a porn star who can take three fists in their ass, but he was one of the most
prolific trainers of his era. At this point, NFL teams didn’t have their own gyms
and players trained wherever they could. This meant that McWilliams ended up
coaching most of the San Diego Chargers, including All-Pros Jack Kemp, Keith
Lincoln and Ron Mix, who led their team to the AFL championship game twice.
McWilliams was just as legendary for his sick arms as he was for being an
amazing trainer, and the arm program he devised was used by himself,
bodybuilding luminary Gene Mozee, and dozens of trainees to put an average of
1.25" on their arms in six weeks.
That’s right- after using it for a month and a half, this program put an over an
inch on the arms of people who used it.
Arms Program
* This program is done, true to bench and arm bro sensibilities, three times a
week.
Superset
Barbell Pullovers - 2 x 12
Close-Grip Bench Presses - 2 x 12
Superset
Barbell Pullovers - 2 x 6
Close-Grip Bench Presses - 2 x 6
Superset
Barbell Curl - 3 x 12
Overhead Tricep Extensions - 3 x 12
Superset
Dumbbell Curl - 3 x 10
Dumbbell Triceps Presses - 3 x 10

Lying Barbell Triceps Extensions - 3 x 12
Close-Grip Bench Presses - 3 x 10*
One-Arm Kickbacks - 2 x 20**

*The second you're done the third set of bench, grab a db and start kickbacks.
**Kickbacks get no rest between arms, but a 30 second rest between sets.
Armand Tanny: Old School Superset Madness
Though his name isn’t well known today, Armand Tanny was the man back in
the day. In the 60s, 70s, and 80s he was a well known author on bodybuilding
and strength training, and prior to that he was an accomplished bodybuilder,
male revue dancer, and admittedly godawful pro wrestler. In spite of a horrific
knee injury that ended his wrestling career, he also managed to rack up a couple
of wins in Olympic weightlifting and odd lifting competitions at 190lbs, which
was incredibly light for a heavyweight.
When he wasn’t trashing dudes in the one handed clean (see above), Tanny
mostly just cared about looking good. To do that, Tanny believed that the best
way to pull it off was to do a brutal superset workout with a partner designed to
have both guys tight, thick, and solid, with good size, and ready for the beach in
under an hour.
Tanny’s program consisted of opposing muscle groups to be worked for as hard

as possible for ten minutes, in sets of six to ten reps. Tanny would do a set of six
to ten of each exercise, then his partner would do six to ten, over and over, until
ten minutes was up. Then, they’d grab a drink of water and smash the next
superset for ten minutes. And so it went until the workout was over and both
dudes looked like their pumps were about to split their skin as they went full
Super Saiyan… at which point they’d waddle down to the beach and wait for the
phone numbers to start floating their way.
The Supersets
Deadlifts / Leg Raises

Military Press / Pullups
Squat / Glute Ham Raise
Bench Press / Bent Over Row
Cambered Bar Curl / Overhead Tricep Extension

Brutal Bertil Fox: The Strongest Bodybuilder of the
1980s and His Gnarly Strip Sets of Death
Calling Bertil Fox a mass monster is a lot like calling Big Ramy the same thing-
they’re so far into a different universe with their physiques that it is difficult to
compare them to mere mortals. Doing so is like comparing Chihuahuas to
bobcats to determine the better pet. Or comparing a Fleshlight or a grapefruit to
a vagina. It’s just goddamn ridiculous.
Fox was the 1978 Mr. Universe, and at 5'8" and 245lbs, he dwarfed everyone
onstage. The next biggest guy was Lee Haney, who was outweighed by Fox for
most of his career in spite of the fact that Fox was three and a half inches shorter
than that eight time Olympia winner. As to why Fox never won, the debate has
raged for the better part of 35 years and the best anyone can guess is Fox had
very little detail in his legs, though his calves were far bigger than just about
anyone who’s ever stepped on that stage.
And as to why you don’t hear about him now, he’s retired to a community in St.
Kitts that doesn’t allow for a great deal of communication. After a bad breakup
about ten years ago, Fox lived up to his name and caught two bodies (the 20 year
old beauty pageant winner and her mom), so he’s spending his remaining days in
the care of the government of St. Kitts.
And if that turns you off from utilizing his workout, I’ve no idea why you’re
holding this book in the first place. In any event, just remember- shit happens
when you party.
His Training Split

Wednesday: Legs
Thursday: Chest and back
Friday: Shoulders and Arms
Abs
Abs are done postworkout daily, unless it’s precontest, in which case they’re
done in the morning and postworkout.
Roman Chair Situps - 20 x AMRAP

Parallel Bar Leg Raises - 20 x AMRAP
Situps - 20 x AMRAP
Per Bertil, here’s how this goes down: “I put two 50's, two 25's and two 15's on
the bar. I do a set of about 10 reps. My training partner puts on another two 15's
and I do another 8 to 10 reps. I then put another two 15's on and do as many reps
as I can. For my last set I will probably have two 50's, two 25's, and six 15's. I
then do what I call a staggered set. [Call it a drop set if you like but it's still a
staggering piece of training!] I do about 6 reps with this weight, and then my
training partner will take off two 15's and I carry on the set. When I can do no
more my training partner takes off another two 15's and I continue until I can do
more. That's MY system for training to failure.”
Seated Behind the Neck Press - 6 x 2-8 (The last set is a drop set)
Dumbbell Seated Press - 6 x 6-15 (start off with a pair of 85's and then the
100's, 110's and so on)
High pulls or Upright Rows - 6 x 5-8

Lateral Raise - 6 x 8-10
Cheat Curl (with cambered bar) - 6 x 6-8

Incline Dumbbell Curl - 6 x 6-8
Barbell Preacher Curl - 6 x 5-8
Skullcrusher - 6 x 5-8
Barbell Overhead Extensions - 6 x 5-8
Arms Tri-Set (Do one exercise after the other as one set. Rest, then repeat)
One Arm Dumbbell Spider Curl - 4 x 20 (reverse the preacher bench, to make
it an ultra strict concentration curl)
Bent Over V-Bar Pushdowns - 4 x 5-8 (he leans into the bar and pushes
straight down from his shoulders
Weighted Dip s- 4 x AMRAP (number of reps varies depending on how heavy

he goes)
One Arm Dumbbell Rows - 6 x 5-8
Behind the Neck Pulldowns - 5 x 5-8
Close Grip Underhand Pulldowns to the Waist - 5 x 8-10
Seated Cable Rows - 5 x 8-10
Weighted Pullups - 5 x 5-8 supersetted with

Cross Bench Dumbbell Pullovers - 5 x 10
Dumbbell Bench Press - 5-6 x 10

Incline Bench Press - 6-8 x 4-15 (drop set like on shoulders)
Incline Dumbbell Flyes - 6-8 x 5-8 supersetted with
Weighted Dips - 6-8 x 5-8
Wednesday: Legs and Arms

Brutal Bertil lived and trained in St. Kitt’s, in a crazy old school gym without
much in the way of machines. As such, you’re about to learn about some old
school alternatives to machines, and the mentality at the time. As Fox said in an
interview, “we don't have a hack squats machine at our gym but I doubt if I
would use it if we did.
Squat - 8-10 x 8-15 (with that horrible drop set at the end of the last set)
Dumbbell Leg Curl - 5-6 x 8-15

Seated Calf Raises (on a bench, with barbell across thighs) - 5-6 x 8-15
And for the new jacks out there who might not feel ready to do 100 reps of
heavy squatting...
Bertil's Beginner's Routine
This workout is done 3-4 times a week, and is what Fox credits with forming the
strong base on which his physique was built. If you find you continually hit a
wall in your training, it could be that your base sucks- it doesn’t matter how
strong you build a house if you build it on quicksand. Thus, it could be time to
go back to the basics for awhile and crush shit, then move onto a move
complicated routine.
Bench Press - 5 x 5-10 (Increase weight each set to end up with a weight with
which you'd fail on the sixth rep)
Dumbbell Fly - 5 x 10
Barbell Row - 5 x 5-10 (Done with the same type of weight increases as the BP)
Overhead Press - 5 x 5-10 (Done with the same type of weight increases as the
BP)
Side Laterals - 5 x 10
High Pull - 5 x 5-10 (Done with the same type of weight increases as the BP)
Squat - 5 x 5*
*supersetted with Straight Arm Pullover- 5 x 20
Strongmen
Strongmen really need no introduction- they’re the burly, brobdingnagian

badasses hoisting huge weights and weird implements for the entertainment of
bigger crowds than any physical culture entertainment outside of CrossFit.
These are often the most well-rounded strength athletes (though bodybuilders
can give them fits in one-on-one competitions), as they have to combine serious
statistics strength with speed and endurance.
Zydrunas Savickas- It’s Hard to Out-Great the GOAT

Strongman
Big Z is one of the winningest strongmen in the history of the sport, and renown
for insane physicality and ridiculous brute strength. Nine time winner of the
Arnold Strongman Classic, four time World Strongest Man winner (and six time
runner up), and still world record holder in the log lift with a press of 222.5kg,
Savickas is a goddamned beast . In truth, the closest thing the human race has to
a real life Incredible Hulk is Zydrunas Savickas, because few can beat his insane
levels of raw power and intestinal fortitude. If Gilgamesh and W onder Woman
conceived a child while drunk as shit on vodka, it’d have po p ped out
musclebound and hungry for bigass potato and pork dumplings, and its name
would have been Zydrunas.
And lest his cherubic face convince you otherwise, the man is anything but a big,
dumb animal. He’s a thinking man, which means
● he trains without a training partner and without a coach . He prefers

doing this shit alone.
● he develops form that suits his frame the best, no matter what
anyone else says about it . What works for everyone else might not be
the optimal form for him, so he experiments and doesn’t consult every
stupid, faceless, anonymous 135lb dickhead on the internet when doing so.
● he changes his goals to suit his situation . When he got injured, he

switched up his focus to more of a bodybuilding style training routine,
going to higher reps (6) with a shorter, bodybuilding style pump type of
rep (bodybuilding partials are short, fast, and for a pump, heavier than full
ROM reps).
o And in true “fuck what ya heard” fashion, Big Z loves the Smith
Machine and uses it on the regular, especially for overhead press.
To build his raw squat of 880 pounds, a 900-pound deadlift, a 629-pound bench,
the strength to win everything, all the time, and put a nearly 500lb log overhead,
Savickas obviously spent a shitload of time in the gym. Here’s the basis of it
(because there is very little chance that’s the entirety of his lifting for the week.
The TLDR : focus on doubles and triples (Big Z rarely does a single, unless he
fails on a second rep in a double), adjust your training to suit your personal goal,
and forge your own path.
Monday- Legs
Back Squat - 1 x 12; 1 x 8; 1 x 6; 1 x 4; 2 x 3
Front Squat - 1 x 8; 1 x 6; 2 x 4
Calves - 4 x 15
Tuesday- Chest and Triceps
Bench Press - 1 x 12; 1 x 8; 1 x 6; 2 x 4; 1 x 2
Incline Bench Press - 1 x 8; 1 x 6; 2 x 4
Close Grip Bench Press - 4 x 5
Tricep Pushdowns - 4 x 8
Wednesday- Back
Deadlift - 1 x 12; 1 x 8; 1 x 6; 3 x 3 (Add weight each set)

Good Mornings - 3 x 6
Machine Pulldowns - 4 x 8
Cable Rows - 4 x 8
Thursday- Overhead
Apollon’s Axle - Training varied

Seated Press (on floor, in the rack, unsupported) - 4 x 5
Shrugs - 4 x 6
Friday- Conditioning
Medicine Ball Throw for Height - 10 - 15 throws
30 minutes of cardio
Saturday- Farmer’s Walk
Farmer's Wal k-150kg in each hand 40M, 2 RUNS .

Manfred Hoeberl- 26” Arms are Useful in Strongman
Hailing from the same tiny hamlet that gave us Arnold, Manfred Hoerberl was
the first man in history to have an upper arm girth three times the size of his
wrist circumference and a rising star in strongman who had his career cut short
by multiple car accidents. Two time Europe’s Strongest Man and runner up in
the 1994 World’s Strongest Man while looking every bit of the next Mr.
Olympia, Hoerberl was in the bodybuilding magazine more than most top-tier
bodybuilders and a name on the lips of every dude who set foot in a gym with
the intention of moving serious weight in the mid-1990’s.
Seriously, he was the ultimate strongman superstar of the 1990s- were he not one
of the shittiest drivers in the history of the automobile, you would likely be
saying, “he’s no goddamned Hoerberl” in every water fountain conversation
about Hafthor. Though the 6’3”, 297lb Hoerberl boasted a 628lb raw bench, 724
raw squat, and 860lb raw pull, what really interested everyone was how the man
was able to close a #3 Captains of Crush and rock arms three times almost as big
as his goddamned waist. As such, here’s the arm workout that led to him
warming up with a 150lb dumbbell before exhibitions.
Hoeberl’s Once Per Week Arm Workout
Stretch the biceps and triceps for 30 seconds
Incline Dumbbell Curls - 2 x 10-12 (Rep Speed: Slow)
Overhead Tricep Extensions with Cambered Bar - 2 x 10-12 (Rep Speed:

Slow)
Stretch for 30 seconds
Close Grip Bench Press / Barbell Curl Superset - 3 x 8-10 (Rep Speed:
Explosive)
Stretch for 30 seconds
V-Bar Pushdown / Dumbbell Curl Superset - 3 x 10-12
Stretch for 1 minute.
Forearm exercises - Dealer's choice. Doesn’t matter how you do them, so long
as they’re dead when it’s over.
Stretch for another minute .

Jesse Marunde: Training Like a Strongman Phenom
So American you’d swear he was born in Texas, Jesse Marunde was larger than
life in just about every way. At 6’4” and 300lbs, he was taller and leaner than
most strongmen, and a young-blood strongman phenom in the early oughts.
After becoming the youngest person ever to close a Captains of Crush No. 3
gripper, Marunde won the Washington State Weightlifting Championships two
years later, and the year after that became the youngest person to qualify for the
World’s Strongest man Three years later, the “effervescent showman” Marunde
became the first American to place in the top two in the World's Strongest Man
for fifteen years.
Tragically, Marunde was never able to grab the crown, as he died of a congenital
heart defect after a brutal medley workout in 2007. Whether he was a victim of
the trend in strongman to combine superhuman strength with Lance Armstrong
levels of endurance, a congenital defect, PEDs (as pussies on the internet
invariably posit), or a combination thereof is irrelevant- Marunde represented
one of the most ludicrous combinations of brute strength and muscular
endurance the world has ever seen.
Marunde’s schedule was as deranged as you’d expect for a guy who nearly won
the World’s Strongest man at 24 (and close two #3 Captains of Crush grippers
simultaneously). He trained twice a day, five days a week, and once on the sixth
and seventh. The workouts changed constantly but the aim remained the same-
become the strongest human being on Earth. We can assume he took a day off
here and there, but like any useful lifter (or any person who isn’t qualified to star
in Simple Jack 2 without acting instruction), he didn’t plan rest days weeks in
advance- he simply took them when he needed them .
Morning: Light-to-Moderate Workout (6AM)
According to Marunde, the morning workouts get the blood flowing. They
create more energy for the heavy evening workout, and its format changes
constantly to keep it fresh.
Basic Warmup
Reverse Hypers - 3 sets
Situps - 3 sets.
Empty Bar Complex - 10 squats, deadlifts, military presses, snatches, jerks,

good mornings, upright rows and bent-over rows
Stretching With the Bar - Your basic shoulder flexibility stuff that
CrossFitters typically do with PVC pipe
Barbell Jumping Jacks - 1 x 20 x 30kg (Starting with a shoulder-width grip
and a narrow stance, he jumps and kicks his feet out to the sides while he
slides his hands to a wide grip position, in a movement that looks just like a
regular jumping jack)
Power Clean + Military Press + Hang Clean + Push Press - Works up to
120kg in 10kg jumps
Muscle Snatches + 2 Hang Snatches - Works up to 100kg
Front Squat - Works up to a single with 160kg

30 Minutes of Kickboxing
Monday- Weightlifting and Sandbags
Drop Snatches (Warmup)
Power Cleans - Work up to 160-170kg
Light Front Squat - Work up to 180kg
Sandbag Carry - 3 x 300ft, carried like a Husafell stone. Sandbag weighs

around 300lb
Tuesday- Snatches, Squats, and Sled
Heavy Power Snatch - Working only doubles and singles up to 160kg

Heavy Back Squat - 5 × 5 x 500lbs (works up to 700 in a squat suit
Front Squat -2 x 15 x140kg
Ab Wheel
Sled - 2 x 200ft drag (pulling while going backward, then facing forward
using a hip belt)
“My alternative to not doing it is to just do it light.” “I’m not afraid to

lift light—not afraid to walk into a commercial gym and train
light. I’ll never not train—I will just back off.”
Wednesday- Light Back and Grip
Light Snatch - Work up to 3 x 3 x 100kg
Lat Work (variety of different grips, including pipes, softballs and a two-
inch revolving bar)
Chins - 8 x AMRAP (with four different grips)
Grip Work
According to Marunde, “you have to have a great grip. You are only as strong as
what you can hold on to, so having strong hands is the most important thing. It’s
true in all sports.”
Thursday- Heavy Back and Shoulders
Heavy Power Clean - Work up to 3 x 2 x 160kg
Deadlift - 462lb x 20 (I have no idea what he chose that weight)

Kettlebell Medley (130lb)
Clean and Press - 1 x 5 reps (each hand)
Bent Over Rows - 1 x 10 (each hand)
High Pulls - 1 x 10 (each hand)
Kettlebell Medley (130lb + 90 for swings + high pulls)
Clean and Press - 1 x 5 reps (each hand)
Bent Over Rows - 1 x 10 (each hand)
Swings - 1 x 10 x 90lb (each hand)
High Pulls - x 10 x 90lb (each hand)
Seated Military Press - 3 x 2 x 315lb
Sandbag Squat - 3 x 20
Friday- Light Weightlifting and Back Squat to Push Press
Light Snatch - Work up to 3 x 3 x 100kg
Back Squat to Push Press - Work up to 190kg (this is an awesome

movement, and the one that got me (the author) to quit doing a bodypart
split. It is an explosive back squat after which you press the bar off your
back)
Light Power Hang Cleans - Work up to 1 x 3 x 130kg
Saturday- Events (no AM Workout)
Stone events are all done without tacky- he only uses that in competition.
Farmer’s Walk - 150ft feet, starting with 200 pounds in each hand and
working up to 313lbs Yoke - 4 x 100ft x 600lbs
Viking Press - 3 x 10 x 330lbs
Stones - Warmup set with five light rocks; 5 x 240lbs; 305; 325; 335; 355;
325 to a 54-inch box.
Stones - 385lbs to 60-inch box; then 72-inch box

Stones - 305, 325, 335, 240 (rest weight) and 325 pounds to 72-inch box
Tire Flip - 900lbs x 20
Sunday- Conditioning
Kickboxing - 1 1/2 hours

Magnus Samuelsson- Legendary Grip Strength
Weighing 320lbs, Magnus Samuelsson has arms bigger and stronger than most
men’s legs, which helped him qualify for the World’s Strongest Man ten times in
thirteen years, and reach the podium in five of those. With enough arm and grip
strength to snap Rictus Erectus’s arm in half like a bit of balsa wood during an
arm wrestling match, Samuelsson’s arm strength can safely be described as
superhuman.
Though you might think that it would have changed a bit over three decades,
Samuelsson claims it’s essentially the same as it’s always been, and looking
deeper into his history, it might even predate that era, because Samuelsson’s
father was also an arm wrestling champion. Nevertheless, his arm work is fairly
basic, because as a full time farmer, Samuelsson gets plenty of heavy, direct arm
work in the course of the average day- there’s not much need to do curls when
you’ve been hoisting cows out of the mud and shifting massive icelandic
boulders all day.
Arms are trained every third day, and the two grip workouts are alternated.
Biceps
Straight Bar Barbell Curl - 60kg x 15; 80kg x 15; 100kg x 15 (to give you
some idea of the loading, he can do 140kg x 4); 60kg x 15 (let the bar roll as far
down toward the fingertips as possible, before reverseing the entire movement)
Captains of Crush - 2 x10; 1-2 x AMRAP
Wrist Roller - 3 x 100% of Max
Wrist Curls - 2 x 10
Light Pinch Grip
Captains of Crush - 2 x 5; 2 x 1; 2 x overload (negatives)

Wrist Roller - 2 x 80% of Max
Wrist Curls - 2 x 10x

Heavy Pinch Grip - 90% of max
Hybrid Athletes
The term hybrid athletes should be self-explanatory, but if you forgot to take
your nootropics this morning, this section covers the type of strength athlete that
was most common prior to the internet era. Guys like bill Kazmaier reigned,
crushing shit on the platform in powerlifting, filling the pages of bodybuilding
magazines, and winning the World’s Strongest Man.
There was Curtis Leffler, a bodybuilder who was begged to do the 1995 WSM,
which occurred only two days after NPC Nationals. Leffler showed up half dead
from dieting and competed in a sport for which he had never, ever trained. He
didn’t win, but he gave it hell, and competed in the Hawaiian Strongman
Championships later that year just to give a better fed account for himself… and
though he didn’t win, beat WSM Hall of Famer Magnus Samuelsson.
Those guys were legion, from ripped-and-ready Olympic weightlifters Russ

Knipp and Tommy Kono to bodybuilder/strongman/bodybuilder Joe Ladnier,
and they aptly demonstrated that restricting yourself to a single strength
discipline isn’t just boring- it’s fucking stupid. Thus, here you have the hybrid
athletes- the people who don’t care what the discipline is- they just want to move
big weights and look awesome doing it.
Brutally In Depth: Pillow- The Insanely Shredded

She-Beast of Bodybuilding and Nerdlesque
As I mentioned previously, freaks and geeks are what built the world of strength
sports. From Sandow, the epic male prostitute (and occasional bodybuilder), to
weirdos like Gypsy Boots (who would piss on his feet in the shower to clean
them because "urine is sterile"), to maniac biker neurology PhDs with a national
record in powerlifting like Oliver Sacks, to comic book nerds, the strength sports
world is where the weirdest outcasts on the planet have collected for decades to
surround themselves with like minded people... and look good doing it.
You also had the straight up geeks, like Aaron Baker, the 90s bodybuilder who
loved Batman so much he would do guest posing routines in a sort-of Batman
costume; Kai Greene, the only nerd solipsistic enough to create a graphic novel
starring himself as the protagonist; and an entire generation of kids who started
lifting to look like the dudes on Dragonball Z. None of them, however, holds a
fucking candle to Pillow, aka the She-Beast, who is perhaps the single coolest
person of whom I've ever heard.
Pro burlesque dancer, cosplayer, Renn Faire enthusiast, fluent speaker of

Klingon, and one of the first successful women’s heavyweight bodybuilders, the
She-Beast was the living embodiment of the “keep it fucking weird” ethos for
which the lifting world was famous before rich suburbanites ruined the fuck out
of the scene. The progenitor of “nerdlesque,” which is a badass mashup of
anything Comic-Con with burlesque, Pillow was likely the source material for
many a nerd’s wet dream long before she stepped onstage and became that
source material for bodybuilding fans as well.
Though her name seems like one of those ironic nicknames given to guys who
look like Bigfoot but get called “Tiny” in the bar, it was her original stage name
as a dancer because her physique was apparently what Gabriel Iglesias would
describe as “fluffy”. In her words, "Pillow was my stage name from a long
time ago when I was doing rock and roll equipment handling and I looked like a
great big squishy pillow, like the Michelin tire gal with a goose down jacket with
feathers leaking out of it and duct tape patches.”
Pillow’s physique after she started bodybuilding was anything but squishy.
Renowned for conditioning that was crazier than a necrophiliac at a clothing
optional zombie party, Pillow was featured in Pumping Iron 2 after winning the
1983 Gold’s Classic and coming in fifth at Nationals in a heavyweight class so
insane that legendary Cory Everson took second. Though she quit competing,
her physique remained utterly insane throughout her dancing career- video of her
on YouTube ten years later shows her bone dry and jacked as hell as she danced
to win Miss Exotic World 1995.
In 1997, she leveled up to “there is only one god, and her name is Pillow” as
performed as a motherfucking Klingon, with two male Klingon escorts wielding
bat’leths. At this point, calling her an absolute legend as a bodybuilder or an
exotic dancer would not do her justice, but there is no word in the human
language that can accurately describe the level of awesome that this woman
reached. As such, Klingon will have to suffice- qeylIS ta'be' (God Queen). Not
only that, but she’s still dancing at 62 and looks better than 9/10 of the chicks at
your local "hardcore" gym (I don’t know many chicks or 62-year-old men or
women with visible vascularity on their biceps), so she’s clearly still smashing
weights.
This ravenous She-Beast got started on her path to her unique brand of
awesomeness as any weirdo worthy of scamming on chickens at a bar with
Gonzo does- by having no friends. Whereas I spent fifth grade reading the
goddamn dictionary and doing wind sprints, she spent hers (being immeasurably
cooler) watching Star Trek and reading Robert Heinlein. Fast forward to age 20,
and she was working as a stage hand at a burlesque show when she discovered
that the dancers were making $5 a night more than she was, so she ditched the
backstage shit for the spotlight. A few years later, she started competing in
bodybuilding and for a while was a superstar in bodybuilding, getting the cover
of Muscle and Fitness and a couple of now-defunct mags, and was a favorite
face of Gold’s Gym while that badass maniac Pete Grymkowski was still
running things.
These days, she spends her time tearing up the parties at Renn Faire as a pirate
lass, performing as a drag king, cosplaying like a motherfucker (sexy Master
Chief, anyone?), and is a member of a "dry-docked" Klingon Assault Group,
which is some kind of charitable club for people who cosplay as Klingons.
Having grown up in a staunchly Star Wars household, I was surprised to find
there is such a thing, since I always thought Trekkies were middle-aged shut-ins
who spent their time practicing their makeout techniques on Worf masks. I stand
corrected.
Tragically, I could only locate her twice a week offseason leg workout, which is
better than nothing given the paucity of information about her training online.
Bear in mind that women's bodybuilding at the time was really more of a modern
bikini competition, so Pillow was already off the upper end of acceptable
muscularity. Had she squatted, she'd likely have had muscularity that would
make the modern physique chicks look sadly underdeveloped by comparison.
Leg Press - 5 x 6-12

Leg Extension - 4-5 x 8-10
Lying Leg Curl - 5-8 x 8-10
Standing Leg Curl - 5-8 x 8-10
Cable Abduction - 4-5 x 8-10
Cable Adduction - 4-5 x 8-10
And as anyone who has been a fan of Plague of Strength / Chaos and Pain
knows, I'm hardly the touchy feely type. That said, I realize my approach doesn't
always reach everyone, and me telling people to grab their balls and listen to
some beatdown hardcore, read Gates of Fire or some Joe Abercrombie, or
watch the Devil’s Rejects doesn't always work. Thus, I figured I'd pass along a
story Pillow related about being true to you and bucking the trends.
Pillow was supposed to meet a friend at some kind of group therapy and
accidentally walked into the wrong room. She realized too late that it was some
kind of AA group for gay people, but before she could leave, they tagged her to
speak. Having the type of massive brass bull balls that allowed her to do
whatever the hell she wanted throughout her life, she stood up and spoke.
"My name is Pillow. I walked into the wrong group. I'm not gay...
I'm not an alcoholic, but I'm here for some fellowship. I train at a
gym where all these people do steroids... I don't do steroids. I
work at a strip joint where a lot of people do stuff I don't believe
in... and I don't do them. And I feel like I don't fit in, anywhere.'
At which point a gay dude who appeared to be in pretty rough shape (cancer or
AIDs or somesuch), leaned over, put his hand on her knee and said,
"'Honey, if you don't fit in anywhere, YOU FIT IN
EVERYWHERE!'"
So, there you have it- Pillow, the She-Beast. Bodybuilder, cosplayer, burlesque
dancer, innovator, and giver of so few fucks she'd have to get them financed if
she was forced to give some. The strength game doesn't have to be one big
inbred fuckfest, no matter how hard these milquetoast Instagram superstars and
super srs "science" dickheads try to make it one. There's always room to do your
own thing, buck the trends, and blaze your own trail.
Life's too short to be boring.

Jon Cole- King of the Supertotal and the First
Collegiate Strength Coach in History
There are a lot of badasses in this book- dudes who have wrestled bears and
fought in wars and done all kinds of bizarre, awesome things that can only be
accomplished with a boatload of testosterone and a desire to be as odd as they
want to be, but few people have the lifting chops that Jon Cole possessed. Cole
was a collegiate national title holder in both powerlifting and track and field,
setting records at his school in both sports. After college, Cole was hired as the
first strength coach in US collegiate history for ASU after the coaching staff saw
what his programs had done for their athletes. His programs for the ASU
football team has a dramatic effect on their record, taking them from a 5-5 team
in 1966 to a 20th in the country with an 8-2 record in 1967 and a repeat of that
record in 1968. By 1973, they’d won the Fiesta Bowl, only lost a couple of
games in a few years, and Jon Cole was one of the premier strength coaches and
trainers in the country.
From there, he built the largest muscular rehab center in the world and coached
multiple NBA, MLB, NFL, and other professional sports players to victory,
which should have allowed him to retire comfortably shortly thereafter. Sadly
for him, but luckily for the strength world, Arthur Jone and Nautilus completely
destroyed his business and nearly bankrupted him, which rekindled his
competitive spirit and led to huge numbers in powerlifting.
Competing at 275, Jon Cole rocked a massive 23.5” upper arm, 16” forearms,
and a 55”, with a ridiculously svelte 34”, so he looked like a goddamn superman
when he stepped onto the platform. And he lifted like one too, posting a 2370
total at 283lbs (there was no 275 class at that time), which even using ACE
bandages for wraps would earn him 14th all time in the 308 class. Had he a 275
to which he could have cut, this total would still have him at third all time, with
little more than bandaids for knee wraps. What’s more, he could throw a
baseball430 feet, pulled 900 twice in three minutes for an exhibition, and had
badass weightlifting numbers- 430lb clean and press, 430lb clean and jerk, and a
340lb snatch in competition.
In short, the man was a superhuman on a scale the world might never see again.
Here is how he trained.
Week One
Day 1
Bench Press (medium heavy) – 10, 8, 6, 5 x 5

Squat (medium heavy) – 10, 8, 6, 5 x 5
Upright Rows – 5 x 8 (adding weight with each set)

Standing Barbell Curls – 5 x 8
Calf Raises – 6 x 20 (2 sets with toes out, 2 in, 2 straight)
Day 2
Power Cleans – 5, 4, 3, 2, 1
Lying Triceps Presses – 5 x 8
Standing Barbell Curls – 5 x 8
Incline Presses (heavy) – 10, 8, 5 x 3
Day 3
Bench Press – same as Day 1
Squat (heavy) – 10, 8, 5 x 3
Arm Work – same as Day 1
Week Two
Day 4
Front Squat (medium heavy) – 10, 8, 6, 5 x 3
Incline Bench (medium heavy) – 10, 8, 5 x 5
Curls – 5 x 8
Lying Triceps Presses – 5 x 8
Calf Raises – 6x20
Day 5
Deadlifts (heavy) – 5, 4, 3, 2, 1
Bench Press (heavy) – 10, 8, 5 x 3
Standing Triceps Presses – 5 x 8
Barbell Curls – 5 x 8
Day 6
Squat (heavy) – 10, 8, 6, 5 x 3

Incline Bench (medium) – 10, 8, 5 x 5
Barbell Curls – 5 x 8
Upright Rows – 5 x 8
Lying Triceps – 5 x 8
Calf Raises – 6 x 20
Brutally In Depth: Chuck Sipes- the Natty AF
Bodybuilding Paratrooper With a Bench That
Shocked the World
The near-mythical badasses of the 1950s and 1960s, legion as they seem to have
been and natty almost to a man, made insanely heavy lifts commonplace by
taking every single modern truism about lifting, dumping it in the goddamn
trash, and deciding that the solution to every problem in the weight room is more
food and harder training. An anathema to the broke dick, science-tastic, weak-
as-hell "evidence based" lifters of the modern era who have deluded themselves
into thinking that aping the methods of the successful is preposterous, the lifters
of the mid-20th Century actually succeeded in the weight room by applying a
little observation and introspection and a massive amount of effort.
One such lifter is Chuck "The Iron Warrior" Sipes, a paratrooper / lumberjack /
powerlifter / bodybuilder / proto-Bear Grylls. More hardcore than one of the kill
scenes in I Spit On Your Grave 3, Sipes managed to rock one of the top three
physiques in the world while benching 570lbs and working 12 hours a day
slaughtering trees like they were hymens after the prom. Though the Olympia
title eluded him like he was an ICE agent chasing Dan Akroyd across the US in
an eerily precognizant social commentary on American isolationism, Sipes
managed to snag the 1959 IFBB Mr. America, the 1960 IFBB Mr. Universe, the
1967 NABBA Mr. World, and the 1968 IFBB Mr. World, while natty as hell and
out-benching every single person on the planet not named Pat Casey (an OG
Westside lifter who, incidentally, outweighed Sipes by 135 lbs).
Chuck Sipes was apparently conceived with the grip strength that later served
him so well as a strongman, and he literally just grabbed fistfuls of his mother's
uterus and ripped her abdomen open, forcing himself into the world in a Chuck
Norris-esque manner in late 1932. In spite of the brutal manner by which Sipes
birthed himself, he grew up a somewhat scrawny kid. As he wanted to play high
school football like any other red-blooded, commie-hating, steak-loving
American boy, he enlisted the aid of his neighbor, weightlifting equipment
luminary Chuck Coker (who later founded Universal Equipment Company).
Utilizing the techniques he learned from Coker, Sipes became a beast on the
football field and after graduation joined the US Army as a paratrooper. In a
bizarre effort to demonstrate the fact that the only person who could kill Chuck
Sipes was Chuck Sipes, he found himself tangled with another trooper during a
practice drop when he’s chute didn't open, and then free-fell 70 feet to the
ground. Though he steadfastly refused to die, Sipes was stuck in the hospital for
four month recuperating from grievous head injuries. Upon receiving a medical
discharge in 1952, Sipes went home with a headful of epilepsy and depression
and the brass fucking balls of a man who could free fall out of an airplane
without a parachute and not only live to tell the tale, but go onto be one of the
greatest bodybuilders of the golden era and the greatest drug-free 220lb bencher
of all time.
Vital Stats
Height : 5'9½"
Weight : 220 lbs.
Arms : 19 ½" (relaxed)

Chest : 50"
Waist : 32"
Thighs : 25 ½"
Calves : 18"
Forearms : 18"
Because the concept of a "natural genetic limit" had not yet been set, Chuck
Sipes went about his business in happy ignorance of the "facts" the evidence-
based dickheads spreading their specious claims across the internet like cancer.
Training with Mr. Universe Bill Pearl, Sipes set his sights on being the greatest
bodybuilder to ever live, though he didn't give two shits about posing and spent
the vast majority of his time heaving huge weights around like toddler throwing
his toys during a tantrum. In spite of that fact, he racked up an impressive
number of wins, including pulling down the “Mr. Pacific Coast” title at the ripe
old age of 41.
Unlike modern lifters, who possess all of the personality of a wax replica of Ben
Stein, the depth of a spilled shot of vodka, and the varied interests of autistic
trapped in a stairwell, Chuck Sipes didn't just lift weights and stare at himself in
the mirror. He organized the American Bodybuilding Club in the 1960's, which
was practically free to join, and gave exhibitions and lectures on the benefits of
fitness and recreational sports. After he hung up his posing trunks, Chuck
volunteered with crippled and retarded kids, which is impressive because he was
not too far removed from a time when humanity either euthanized them or
stuffed them in the basement of a mental institution until some shitbird doctor
wanted to torture, lobotomize, or starve them to death.
As if that wasn't enough do-goodery and well-roundedness, Sipes also painted a
shitload of Western landscapes and 19th century mountain men. He also took
teenage criminals on week-long trips into the mountains to teach them to rely on
teamwork for survival, presaging the spate of horrible reality television
American women would come to watch 30 years later. In spite of all that and
his misplaced faith in the Christians’ god (seems CTE isn’t an excuse for killing
yourself, so he burns forever) Chuck Sipes apparently had enough of the seizures
and depression stemming from his head injuries and hung it up on February 24,
1993, at the age of 61. Ever the badass, Sipes was buried in buckskins, just like
Davy Crockett would have been if Mexican soldiers hadn't scattered and defiled
his remains out of bitterness that they suck at war harder than channers suck at
lifting.
The best part? Chuck began his competitive bodybuilding career completely
unwillingly. When he was lifting in junior college, his training partners filled
out an entry form to the physique contest, then told Chuck that he had to get up
on stage and pose. Though he initially refused, the dude knew he looked
amazing, so he finally went onstage, totally unprepared, and start busting poses.
It's not every day you see the second biggest bencher on the planet bending rebar
in half wearing nothing but an adult diaper and a peace medallion.
Contest History
1958 Mr. Northern California 1st
1958 Jr. Mr. America 3rd (Western section)
1958 Mr. America 9th

1959 IFBB Mr. America 1st
1960 IFBB Mr. Universe 1st

1966 Mr. Olympia 3rd (won by Larry Scott)
1967 Mr. Olympia 2nd (won by Sergio Oliva)
1967 NABBA World Championships 1st
1968 Mr. Northern California 1st
1968 IFBB Mr. World 1st (The Mr. Olympia was held the same day, and had
also taken time to perform strongman stunts.)
1970 IFBB Mr. Universe 2nd medium class (Overall won by Arnold)
1974 Mr. Pacific Coast 1st (over-40 class)
Best Lifts
Bench Press : 570 lbs.

Squat : 600 lbs.
Standing Barbell Curl : 250 lbs.

Yes, yes- get on with how this superhuman maniac trained, right? The man was
a goddamn bulldozer, crushing weights all fucking day long, breaking hearts and
spines all the live-long day. According to Dennis Weis, Sipes believed in
training often, training heavy, and doing a shitload of supports and partials do
build sick tendon and ligament strength. To determine the proper exercises and
his set and rep range, Sipes treated lifting like a blind man does an orgy (he just
feels it out) and examined the effect of the exercises in previous workouts to
determine the best combination of movements to achieve his goals. Sipes
believed that he could feel out a good workout, rather than following a set
regime in which he followed a system of glacial, unrelentingly boring, counter-
intuitive, artificial, incremental progression based on the half cocked theories of
geographically distant Communists. Additionally, like any rational, thinking
person with a belief in biology, the theory of specialized adaptation, and a
general belief in the theory of evolution, Sipes said, "whenever I specialize on a
body part, my stamina and endurance improve remarkably. In this way, the
muscle ache and tightness I spoke of subsides quickly and in this way, there is
less rest between sets."
This led Sipes, even while training for strength, to rest between sets "only
momentarily, probably less than 10 seconds. On most regular type exercise
schedules, my rest periods between sets are around 20 to 30 seconds and no
more." Additionally, he followed a super-intense split, in which he trained two
to three times a day, six days a week. There was no retarded Stuart McRobert-
loving whining about how he had bad genetics, or a Mentzer-esque love for
abstaining from the gym in deference to the library and methamphetamines,
wherein he would have spent countless hours misinterpreting an extremely
simple subset of Russian philosophy, or an incessant screeching about the need
for layoffs and deloads- it was simply complete dedication to busting his ass on
the exercise on which he wanted to get very, very good.
In spite of his nearly psychotic dedication to training, Sipes wasn't above
heading off into the woods with up-and-coming teenage criminals, with friends,
or by himself for a week or more at a time. Giving exactly zero shits about his
diet or how it would impact his latest round of a terrible cookie-cutter Russian
routine, Chuck would just forge out into the woods and have a good time.
According to his buddy Norm, on camping trips they used
"workouts involving cables, which would be tied around trees and

then stretched in various exercises. Their conversations around
campfires on such outings were the underpinnings of a lifelong
friendship, and now, when Norm speaks of Chuck, it is with
warmth, love, respect, and bewilderment as to what changed
Chuck’s outlook later in life. After a month in the woods, Chuck’s
bodyweight often decreased by 15 to 20 pounds, and Norm
remembers the amazing transformation Chuck could undergo in
regaining the lost weight and muscle. He simply ate more and
lifted. No drugs."
If nothing else, Chuck Sipes should stand as an example of how to approach

training- with an open mind and zero shits given. His method was essentially a
weightlifting paean to Bruce Lee's philosophy of amalgamating the most
effective fighting styles into his own, and a nod to everyone who’s ever thrown
anything they could find in the fridge and cupboard into a pot and unwittingly
produced the best goddamn chili anyone ever ate. Additionally, it's not unlike
the Paleo crossfitter who buys a burger and tosses the bun- there's something to
be learned from just about everybody, and no one's above analyzing the greats
from any sport to help propel themselves to a semblance of that greatness.
That said, here are some of the methods Sipes employed over the course of his
career (and those methods were legion).
Monday/Thursday
Back Squat – 2 x 6, 2 x 4, 2 x 2
Bench Press – 2 x 6, 2 x 4, 2 x 2
Conventional Deadlift – 2 x 6, 2 x 4, 2 x 2
Shrug – 4 x 8
Cheat Curl – 4 x 6
Preacher Curl – 5 x 10
Situp – 3 x 20
Leg Raise – 4 x 15
Overhead Press – 5 x 6
Incline DB Flye – 3 x 8
Calf Raise – 4 x 20
Tuesday/Friday
Heavy 1/4 Bench Press – 5 x 8

Heavy 1/4 Back Squat , (no lockout, 50-100lb over your max squat)– 5 x 8
Stiff Legged Deadlift off Bench or Box (bodybuilding-style deficits)– 5 x 4
Chins – 6 x 6
Dips – 5 x 8
Skullcrusher – 5 x 8
Abs
Power Arm Routine
Monday/Thursday
Superset One
Cheat Curls – 5 x 6 - 8 (explosive cheat on the concentric, extremely slow

descent on the eccentric portion)
Concentration Curls – 5 x 10 - 12 (Elbow braced on the thigh, one second

peak contraction, one second pause fully relaxed at bottom)
Superset Two
Alternating Dumbell Curls – 5 x 6 - 8 (ultra heavy with a slight cheat)

Alternating Incline Curl – 5 x 8 (moderate weight, slow and controlled)
Reverse Barbell Curl – 6 x 6 - 8
Shape and Size Arm Routine
As with every other bodypart, Sipes had a lot of different methods for training
his gigantic arms, each one crazier than a bunny in a blender on Easter morning.
Interestingly, Chuck had extremely different methods for training his arms based
on what he was doing- when it was for shape and size, he focused on biceps, but
as you'll see in the power section, triceps were his focus in training for pressing
power. In his own words:
"Many bodybuilders say the triceps is first in arm importance, saying it is the
largest muscle in the arm. I rank the triceps last on my list. Why? An
unimpressive, large but droopy and poorly shaped arm is not what I want.
Besides, the triceps are not as important in my strength feats.
With the triceps last, next up the list with me is forearms. This muscular area
of the arms is vital both to appearance - nothing is so unsightly as a big upper
arm and a pair of sticks for forearms - and for gripping strength well
developed forearms are essential. Every bodybuilder should work the
forearms regularly as part of their workouts. I worked in sawmills and
lumberjacking when I was younger, and this helped my development and
strength quite a bit.
But, at the top of the list is the biceps area. The better developed and stronger
your biceps are, the better off you will be physically. They should be #1 on
your arm training list. Therefore, this arm development article will
concentrate on developing this area, the biceps."
Monday/Thursday
Barbell Curl 21's
7 reps from bottom position to middle position,

7 reps from middle position to top of movement,
7 full-range reps
4 sets x 21 reps
Cheat Barbell Curl : 16 x 4 (You read that right- sixteen sets of four)
Alternate one set of 21's to each 4 sets of Cheat Curls.
Tuesday/Friday
Skullcrusher 21's
7 reps from bottom position to middle position,

7 reps from middle position to top of movement,
7 full-range reps
4 sets x 21 reps
Conventional Skullcrushers : 16 x 4
One set of 21's to each 4 sets of regular skullcrushers
Forearm Routine
Guaranteed to turn your hands into immobile claws for a couple of weeks, this
brutal routine is what resulted in Sipes' insane 18" forearms... along with a hell
of a lot of chopping wood. How the man managed to do both is a mystery for
the ages, because a day of swinging an axe alone is enough to reduce most
humans to a pile of blubbering bullshit, and this dude did both.
Reverse Curl (slowly) – 4 x 8
DB Wrist Forearm Curl (off knee) – 4 × 15

Cable or Pulley Reverse Curl – 4 × 12
Rubber Ball Squeeze, Newspaper Roll-up, etc.

Chet Yorton- the Father of Natural Bodybuilding
(And the Only Guy to Beat Arnold)
Chet Yorton is a fun example to jam in the face of the natty bros screeching
about genetic limits, because he pretty much defied all of them. Rocking 19”
ultra-lean arms on a 220lb competition body, Chet Yorton stood as a natty
bulwark against the rising tide of gear users until he finally decided it wasn’t
worth competing any longer. He handed Arnold the only loss of the young
Austrian’s career in bodybuilding, posted a solid 600lb squat, 450 two second
paused bench, and 600lb deadlift during the odd lift era (pre-standardized
powerlifting), and recorded a solid Olympic weightlifting total to boot… all in
spite of being in a car accident that would have left most people crippled for
life. According to Earle Leiderman,
"After he had somewhat recuperated from a total physical wreck of

broken and also shattered bones, serious multiple lacerations,
concussion, and also escaping by only one-eighth of an inch from
death, he developed himself so rapidly despite such handicaps,
that within two years of exercising he won the title of Mr.
Wisconsin, and also in the same affair won an extra award for
being the most muscular. Such seems to be somewhat of a record--
to become a prize winner within two years after a start from
physical profundity."
We’re talking about a man whose legs were so utterly mangled that he was
halfway to being wolverine when the surgeons had finished with him who
managed not only to walk again by training six days a week, but who managed
to become the greatest bodybuilder on the planet, drug free. And simply saying
the man trained six days a week is an insufficient description of what Chet
Yorton did- he trained so hard, and with so much volume, six days a week, that
you might get rhabdo reading his program… and so balls-out, diehard natty that
he went on to form the first drug tested bodybuilding organization the world had
ever seen.
The following is Chet Yorton’s pre-contest program, which was done two days
on, one day off.
Day 1: Chest, Shoulders and Triceps
Bench Press - As many sets as necessary until you reach 100 reps total, then
1 rep max. Chet usually did 5 sets of 22 with 315 and then a max single. On
these and every other set, Chet went to failure.
Lateral Raise - 5 x 8-10

Bent Over Lateral Raise - 5 x 8-10
Barbell Overhead Press - 5 x 8-10

Barbell Front Raise - 5 x 8-10
Triceps Pushdown - 5 x 8-10

Reverse Grip Dip - 5 x 8-10
Single Arm Overhead Extension - 5 x 8-10

Triceps Kickbacks - 5 x 8-10
Incline Crunches - 500 reps
Leg Raise - 500 reps

Day 2: Back, Biceps and Legs
Behind the Neck Pulldown - 5 x 8-10

Wide-Grip Row - 5 x 8-10
Reverse-Grip Row - 5 x 8-10
One Arm Dumbbell Row - 5 x 8-10
Barbell Curl - 5 x 8-10
Concentration Curl - 5 x 8-10

Seated Alternating Dumbbell Curl - 5 x 8-10
Standing Dumbbell Curl - 5 x 8-10
Squat - 5 x 8-10
Hack Squat - 5 x 8-10

Leg Curl - 5 x 8-10
Leg Extension - 5 x 8-10

Standing Calf Raise (Toes pointed straight) - 5 x 40
Standing Calf Raise (Toes pointed out) - 5 x 40

Standing Calf Raise (Toes pointed in) - 5 x 40
Incline Crunches - 500 reps

Leg Raise - 500 reps
Brutally In Depth: Ivan Putski, Overhead Presser
Extraordinaire
Poland is an interesting place. Wedged in between the titans of Europe, the

Germans and the Russians, the Poles pretty much fought a two front war
against both groups for centuries, and finally had their shit handed to them in
the 18th Century when the Russians and Prussians basically just walked in and
started pointing at random shit and yelling "Mine!" like a couple of fat,
retarded girls in an ice cream shop. Thereafter, both countries started what
pretty much amounted to the least fair campaign of discrimination and
disinformation of all time, shouting to the mountaintops about how the Poles
were a pack of ugly, stupid pack animals that you'd like in your kitchen less
than an unwashed, rotting donkey's ass. For those of you who've never been to
Poland, Poles are actually pretty goddamn awesome. In fact, you could throw
a rock into a crowd in Poland and hit three chicks that look like models- there's
a reason Hitler had the SS banging the ever-loving shit out of every broad in
Poland.
There exists, however, a Pole who exists simply to disabuse you of the false
notions you might hold about the Poles, and his name doesn't rhyme with
"oodzianowski". Nope, before Marius could doff his fishnet tank top to hand
you a beating, another badass Pole would rip off your arms and beat you to death
with them were he to hear you spout off with some Polish jokes in his presence.
That man was Ivan "The Polish Hammer" Putski. Putski, born Josef Bednarski,
was born in Poland and immigrated shortly thereafter. You'll hear a lot of
bullshit about how his English sucked, but that seems purely a gimmick- in the
interview to which I listened, the dude sounded like he was speaking on the
phone from horseback in West Texas with chaw in his mouth and bowl of bean-
free chili in his lap.
For those of you who are unaware, Putski was a professional wrestler in the
early years of the WWF, in a time when WWF wrestlers looked much more like
superheroes than men's board shorts models. He was one of the massive dudes
in league with guys like the benching phenomenon Ted Arcidi, Olympic
weightlifter and strongman Ken Patera, and overall beast and badass facial hair
rocker "Superstar" Billy Graham. Throughout his career he mostly feuded with
Billy Graham and the successor to Graham's original look, none other than Jesse
"The Body" Ventura. At the time, because there were so many jacked-to-bits
dudes dripping testosterone and chugging cans of whoop ass that they regularly
had to dispense with the bullshit histrionics and just settle shit Over the Top-style
with arm wrestling matches. It was clearly a different time then, as the 180lb
oily goofballs predominating the modern WWE would have been eaten alive in
Putski's era.
Putski stood a mere 5'6", but his weight as a wrestler and strongman vacillated
between 225 and 300 pounds. Most of the latter part of his career, in which he
was more or less a bodybuilder, he was a lean 250 lbs, which is the same billed
weight as Triple H, who's considered huge by modern wrestling standard in spite
of the fact that he's almost a full foot taller than Putski. If you haven't yet caught
on, Putski is and was not to be fucked with. Throughout his life, Putski was a
professional football player (in the fledgling Continental League), a strongman
who competed in the 1978 World's Strongest Man, and Tag Team World
Champion with Tito Santana. Thus, he did more awesome shit in an average day
than most of us will likely do in our lives, and thought nothing of it.
I first read about Putski when researching Destroy the Opposition , and found
him mentioned in a story about the barrel-chested bench press phenom Doug
Young. As I detail in the powerlifter section of this book, Young was one of the
greatest benchers in history, and an absolute muscular beast at 242. When
Young was coming up in the scene, he happened to hit up the gym where Ivan
Putski lifted. By any account I've been able to find, Putski gave exactly zero
shits about programming- he just went in the gym, found someone doing
something epic, and attempted to best them at their pet lift in marathon workouts
that left everyone covered in vomit while Putski happily munched on boiled eggs
and patted them on the head like they were small, harmless children. According
to lifting historian Terry Todd, here's what happened when these two lunatics
met on the iron battlefield.
"The word had gotten around to all the local horses, and so we
had a big bunch at the T.A.C. when Doug began to train. No one,
however, except Ivan Putski, the Polish pro-wrestler, seemed very
interested in benching that day; and we suspect Putski didn’t
know, or care, what was on the bar. The rest of us, though, surely
knew – and cared. Doug took 135 for 100 reps as a warmup and
then went to singles with 225, 315, 405, 485, 505, and 520. He
then dropped back to 405 for 8 repetitions and 315 for 15. Not
bad, seeing as how he had just lost weight down from 260 in an
effort to stay somewhere near the 242-pound class limit."
That, my friends, is how babies get made. Putski didn't give a shit that Doug
Young was the greatest bencher in history at that point, that Young benched
more in a week than most people do in a month, or that Young had benched 545
with three broken ribs in the past- he just nutted up and matched him rep for rep
on anything like the beast that he was. From other anecdotal accounts about
Putski, that seemed to be his M.O.- he'd just step up to keep his rep up, whether
it was Ken Patera doing overhead presses or some goofball doing calf raises like
he was training for the world championships of accessory movements. Lest you
think I'm joking about the latter bit, I'm not. One account I found online was
from a self-professed nobody who happened to work out at a World Gym
frequented by a bunch of WWE wrestlers and a couple of East Coast
bodybuilders, including Mike Katz of "Pumping Iron" fame. This guy recounted
the following of Putski:
"I remember I was working out my strongest body part "calves" when
Ivan politely asked me if he could work in on the standing calf
machine with me. I was thrilled to be working out with the man
who patented the "Polish Hammer" as a finisher. I remember Ivan
eating a couple of dozen hardboiled eggs during his workout. He
would do a set then eat a couple of eggs, do another set eat a
couple more eggs etc. Ivan's English was very broken back then,
but when I was laughing at his eating so many eggs during his
workout he simply said ‘Putski eat, Putski push’ and push he
did......an amazing powerhouse!
We eventually had the calf machine maxed out with all the weight that it
could handle. 1400 lbs, to be exact, we had the entire weight stack
pegged plus hung and placed 100 lb dumbbells and plates
anywhere on the machine that we could safely add to the
resistance of that poor overloaded machine. We both did our last
set with 1400 lbs for several reps when Ivan downed a couple
more eggs, then came over and patted me on the shoulder, gave
me a thumbs up, and a wink, as he grabbed his gym bag off a
nearby bench and headed to the locker room."
It becomes fairly apparent from those accounts that Putski didn't really stick
rigidly to a set program- he just loved lifting. He did have a basic program he
apparently stuck to rather loosely, just because he traveled so much for the
WWE. According to the interview I heard with him, however, he still trained on
the road, and ensured that he took the earliest flight possible so he could get in a
morning lift and then wrestle in the evening. His brutal workouts, however, all
took place in the beginning of the week, when he wasn't traveling.
His main training days, then, were as follows:
Monday: Chest and Shoulders
Bench Press - 225 x 10; 325 x 10; 425 x 8; 425 x 7; 425 x 8; 425 x 8; 425 x
7; 425 x 7; 425 x 8; 425 x 6; 425 x 7; 425 x 7; 425 x 6 ; 425 x 5; 425 x 4
Each set was taken to failure, and he continued doing sets until he noticed a
significant drop-off in bar speed and strength. He called it "train yourself ‘til
you strain yourself." Putski, incidentally, was reputed to have a 600+ pound
bench.
Push Press - 2 warmup sets; 13-15 x 6-15 with the same weight (he used 325
until his reps dropped to 6)
Tuesday: Legs
Box Squats (to a high bench): 300 x 10; 500 x 10; 15 x 10 x 650
Stadium Stairs - He would run the stairs of a local high school football
stadium for an hour if the weather allowed.
Wednesday: Arms and Deads
Standing Barbell Curl or Seated Concentrated Curl - 15-20 x 10
Skullcrushers or Standing Triceps Extensions - 15-20 x 10 (he’d go until

his form turned to shit)
Deadlifts - Work up to a 5RM
The rest of the week, he'd be traveling and wrestling at night, so he would get
into the gym early and do smaller workouts. Frankly, the fact that he wasn't in a
coma by Wednesday night is a testament to the type of beating you can put on
your body and survive. By all accounts, Putski was the nicest goddamn guy on
Earth, and was constantly smiling. He was one of the few wrestlers to remain a
babyface his entire career, because he was just too nice to play a heel. This, I
suppose is proof that you needn't be a total cock to be a badass, which is
somewhat disappointing, as I like to think that channeling my inner Tommy
Conlon spurs me on to victory.
Instead of being fueled by hate, however, Putski was fueled by the produce of his
massive appetite. Like most of the old-school, Putski ate more in a sitting than
most of us eat in a day. When Putski was first starting out, he lacked the money
to eat anything expensive, "so a usual evening meal would consist of a quart or
two of raw oysters. a pound of cheese, some Polish sausage, and fresh fruit. As
he began learning about U. S. cooking, he developed a taste for fried chicken
and it’s not at all uncommon for him to eat 20 or 30 pieces after an evening
bout." In case your math sucks, that's between two and a half and four WHOLE
fried chickens in a single meal. As he gained prominence in wrestling and
became a bigger earner, Putski started eating steak three times a day, in addition
to what was reputedly an absurd amount of kielbasa. This then, lends a great
deal more support to the credo of "eat big to get big", because Putski was a
gigantic sonofabitch.
Thus, to bring it all home for you, the following can be gleaned from Putski's
example:
● you can, and likely should, be doing far more volume than you are
currently doing.
● you can pretty much eat whatever you want in whatever quantities you
want if you train your ass off, provided that your diet is heavy as hell on
proteins.
● you don't have to be an asshole to be a total badass.
● compared to Ivan Putski, we are all a bunch of pussies.
Go eat something already.
Mariusz Pudzianowski- Too Sexy for This Planet
There is almost no chance in hell that you’ve never heard of Pudz. Goat herders
in Afghanistan chant his name when they have to summon the strength to throw
a goat over their neighbor’s house to win his daughter’s hand in marriage, and
the tribesmen of Papua New Guinea invoke his name whenever they begin to
feast on the corpse of a loved one, left to rot in the sun for a full week before
they begin their meal. The mere mention of Pudz’s name helps the putrefying
human flesh slide down their gullets in all that much more satisfying a manner.
Frankly, I would be unsurprised if upon our first contact with aliens, they don’t
greet the human delegation in a fishnet half shirt, flipping over cars and fighting
random passersby in what can only be described as the ultimate human
activities.
Should you, however, lack access to the various and sundry forms of electronic
communication that would enable you to know all there is to know about our
lord and savior, Mariusz Pudzianowski, allow me to enlighten you, so as to save
your immortal soul from an eternity of damnation to weakness and sadness.
Pudz is a five time World’s Strongest Man and two time runner up, with 42
combined first place finishes in that sport; a green belt in kyokushin; an amateur
rugby union player; the second place finisher in Poland’s Dancing With the
Stars; co-star of a terrible music video with his brother, in which they dressed
like the goofballs in Right Said Fred; a mixed martial artist with a 12-7 (his most
recent loss the result of a bad knee injury, and one other loss was literally the
result of exhaustion and his opponent smothering him with his fat); and a badass
gym lifter with a 640lb raw bench, a 840lb wrapped squat, and a 915lb raw
deadlift.
To accomplish all of that, Mariusz has an intense and diverse training routine
that is never exactly the same as the workout prior. He has three main workout
formats through which he rotates and trains five to six days a week, depending
on how much rest he requires and how he feels, and his rest days fall wherever
he needs them.
Da y 1 AM: Legs and Lats
High Bar Back Squat -
Warm-up- 8 sets, pyramiding from 60 to 160kg
Work sets (wrapped)- pyramiding from 160 to 280kg, 2-6 reps

Leg Curl - 6 x 20
Leg Extension - 6 x 20
Pullups - 6 x 15
Chinups - 6 x 10
Behind-the-Neck Pulldowns - 4 x 15
Barbell Rows - 4 x 15
Abs (hanging leg raise, bends, etc)- 6 x 30

Day 1 PM: Events
Sandbag Carry (130kg on back)- 3 x 170m

Conan's Wheel (290kg)- 3 x 2.5 revolutions
Tire Flip - 3 x 10 flips
Day 2 AM: Legs and Shoulders
Front Squats - work up to 250
Calf Work - 6 x 15
Standing Military Press-
Warm-up sets - 7 x 60-100kg

Work sets - 6 x 4-5 x 110-40kg
Deadlifts -
Warm-up sets - 6 x 200kg
Work sets - work up to 300kg
Good Mornings - 8 x 100kg

Day 2 PM: Events
Bushman's Walk - 3 x 15m x 300kg

Presses with Machine Used in Competition - 3 x 10x 120kg
Parallel Crucifix - 40kg x 30 sec
Day 3 AM: Chest and Tris
Bench Press -
Warm-up sets - work up to 180kg in 8 sets

Work sets - work up from 150kg to 220kg, going from 8 down to 2 reps
Skullcrushers - 6 x 15
Overhead Triceps Extensions - 6 x 15
Day 3 PM: Events
Same as Monday, plus powerstairs and so-called parallel stairs.

Paul Anderson- When You’re This Strong, You Can
Pretty Much Do Whatever You Want
Have you ever felt like just digging a hole in your backyard, then building a
squat stand over it and loading a thousand pounds on it, then standing in the hole
and doing partials with it? Me neither. Paul Anderson, however, thought about a
lot of crazy shit like that. Paul Anderson, if you don't know already, was an
American Olympic weightlifter, proto-powerlifter, and strongman who was well
known for his weird-ass training style and his penchant for shattering world
records. At 5’9” and the middle 300s, Paul Anderson was far further from weak
than he was from lean, and the man’s strength was so prodigious he seemed to be
as much a fairy tale as he was a real person.
Not that he helped his case much in that regard. The aforementioned Jon Cole
was having none of Anderson’s bullshit and repeatedly called him out to
compete, to prove one and for all who the strongest person on the planet was. In
Cole’s mind, anyone comfortable with the mantle “strongest man on Earth”
better be ready to step up to keep his rep up and prove it in competition.
Anderson, true to his bizarre form, made an endless series of excuses to avoid it,
and the entire matter was dropped (much to Cole’s dissatisfaction).
For those of you who are unaware, Paul Anderson was a powerlifter before the
sport really existed, and who out squatted everyone on the planet for decades.
Due to his unspeakable strength, he was invited to the US Olympic trials, rightly
believing that Anderson’s insane strength would be something the Russian
heavyweights couldn’t match. Paul ended up training the quick lifts for a year,
and in that time managed a gold in the US Nationals, World Championships, and
the Olympics, after which time he went back to doing random shit like golf
lifting (two power racks set up 400 yards apart that he’d hit a ball, walk to,
squat, and repeat), a short lived boxing career, and running a Christian group
home.
As to his lifts, Anderson was a goddamned monster who had a 402.5lb clean and
press, a 440lb clean and jerk, and a 347lb snatch, in addition to a raw 920lb
squat, 1160lb silver dollar squat, a push press of 500lbs, and could squat 700 x
10 with no warmup whatsoever.
Before we get into his training methods, it would only seem appropriate to
outline the man himself, as although he's certainly every bit the strength sports
badass who generally receives treatment on Plague of Strength, he is hardly the
psychotic, misanthropic, purveyor of destruction some of the other maniacs in
these pages are. Paul Anderson was none of those things- instead, he was a
deeply religious Southern Baptist big softie who some might say squandered all
of his talent performing exhibitions rather than actually competing to raise a
youth home for disadvantaged kids. Nowhere will you find stories of Paul
Anderson, hard drinking, coke snorting, bulldozer of a man who once threw a
boulder through the window of a McDonalds or smashed his face open by
headbutting a pay phone off a wall, or holding people hostage for a ham
sandwich. Instead, Paul Anderson was what can only be described as a really,
really nice guy.
Powerlifting Routine
Mon, Weds, Fri: Shoulders and Chest
Press Off Rack - 1 x 6 x 300, 1 x 2 x 400, 1 x 2 x 390, 1 x 2 x 370
Rack Press Outs (from sticking point to lockout)- 1 x 4 x 500
Press From the Shoulders To Top Of Head - 1x4x500
Push-Press Off Rack - 1x3x450

Bench Press - 1 x 6-8 x 400-450
Tues, Thurs, Sat: Squat and Deadlift
Full Squat - 2 x 10 x 600, 1 x 2 x 825, 1 x 2 x 845, 1 x 2 x 900
Half Squat - 1 x 2 x 1200

Quarter Squat - 1 x 2 x 1800
Deadlift (with hooks rather than straps)- 4 x 6-8 x 650His rest periods
explain part of the reason he trained all day, too- he rested 10 to 15 minutes
between sets and would sometimes take an hour break between exercises.
Olympic Weightlifting Routine
Mon, Weds, and Fri: Everything But the Squat
Overhead Press - Lots of sets of 2x320
Dumbbell Press - 7 x 3 x 135
Press Behind Neck - High reps to pump up the shoulder area
Snatch - Singles, working up from 225 to 300 pounds.

Squat Clean - Singles up to 400 pounds.
Deadlift - 2 x 3 x 690lbs
High Pulls (to waist)- 4 x 3 x 500lbs
Tues, Thurs, Sat: Squat
Full Squats - Doubles, working up to 780 pounds for 3 x 2

Svend Karlsen- Viking Power Like What
A powerlifter and bodybuilder who is so inexpressibly superhuman that he only

started competing in strongman as a retirement activity , Svend Karlsen is the
guy you would recognize from the WSM for screaming “VIKING POWER”
during each event. Though extremely light for a strongman at 287lbs, Karlsen
has managed three top-three finishes in the World’s Strongest Man and won in
2001 and was the second person inducted into the Strongman Hall of Fame , in
addition to half a million top three finishes in smaller shows.
As a sub 300lb WSM competitor, Karlsen needed to be strong as hell and faster
than a fat kid chasing an ice cream truck, and his training definitely reflected
those needs . His gym lifts were without question the former- he pulled a triple
with 881 (without straps), busted a single on the wrapped squat with the same
weight, and benched 573 in the gym, so all that was left was the events… and no
one trained events more than Karlsen.
Day 1: Events and Triceps
Barbell Log Press - 2-3 x 6-12 (that’s 2 to 3 sets of 6 to 12 reps)

Tire Flip - 3 x 6-8 flips
Stones - 3 x 5
Close Grip Bench Press - 1 x 4-6; 1 x 10-14
Lying French Press - 2 x 8-12
Pushdowns - 2 x 8-12
Crunches - 3 x 12
Day 2: Squatting
Front Squat - 2 x 4-6
Karlsen Squats - 3 x 8-12 (on hack squat machine, facing into the machine
rather than out)
Leg Extension - 3 x 12 – 20
Calf Raise - 3 x 20
Concept 2 Rower - 3 x 500 meters
Day 3: Cardio
Fast Walking or Easy Swimming for 1 Hour
Day 4: More Events
Apollon’s Axle - 1 x 1 – 3; 1 x 6 – 10
Log Lift - 1 x 4 – 8; 1 x 8 – 12
Karlsen Crucifix Flyes - 2 x 8
Incline Log Press - 1 x 3 – 6, 1 x 12
Crossovers - 3 x 8 – 12
Day 5: Deadlifts
Deadlift - 2 x 3 – 6
Seated Rows - 3 x 8 – 12
Pulldowns - 3 x 8 – 12
Shrugs - 3 x 12
Bent Over Laterals - 3 x 8 – 12

Day 6: Cardio
Fast walking or light swimming – 1 hour
Day 7: More Deadlifts
Super Yoke - 3 x 25 meters
Farmers Walk ( outdoors, in the snow )- 2 x 2 x 35m
Conan’s Wheel - 2 x 3 laps
Truck Pull - 3 x 10 meters
Keg Load- 3 x 5 kegs for 5 -10 meters
Day 8: Rest
He gets a massage. Cue the Redditors whining, “MUST BE NIIIIICE!” That

said, a meta-analysis of studies on the efficacy of massage for improving
shoulder flexibility showed that massage definitely improves range of motion,
and when range of motion is improved, the potential for greater hypertrophy
is definitely increased. Thus, getting monthly massages during really heavy
training periods isn’t just suggested, it’s damn near required.
Brutally In Depth: John Grimek- People Take This
Programming Shit WAY Too Seriously
You ever think to yourself, "Maybe I should plan out my workouts?" or "Maybe
I should pay some coach for a cookie-cutter routine that has nothing to do with
my own individual strengths and weaknesses in the gym? That shit might work
better... after all, that's what everyone else does."
Well, here's a newsflash- everyone else sucks , and most of the programs you
read about rigidly adhered to by the greats are likely fabrications or a basic
summary of their training methods. I know, you might think you know someone
who doesn't suck and rigidly adheres to a set routine. Consider this for a second,
though: are they alive right now? If so, they likely suck. This includes me,
because I'm aware that I'm alive and have not yet:
● attained the strength or muscularity of people of bygone eras, like the

Viking at Stamford Bridge, who single-handedly fought off an entire army
of Saxons for an hour until being stabbed in the cock by a treacherous
Englishman.
● fucked my way through multi-thousands-broad harems, like Khosrau II

had a harem of 3000 wives, in addition to 12,000 assorted broads.
● slain any dragons like Daniel, who killed off the last dinosaur by
poisoning it in a temple of Marduk. According to other sources, it might
have been Alexander the Great who killed it. Either way, it's brutal they
went near a dinosaur and perverse that they killed it.
● carried a 1,100lb cannon off a field of battle single-handedly like Peter

Francisco.
● or done any of the badass shit John C. Grimek did just because he was
awake.
In short, a plan to become a badass is likely a plan

designed to fail, because brass balls and steadfast will
make winners, not spreadsheets.
Vital Statistics
Height : 5'8½"
Weight : 221 lbs. (giving him the biggest height to weight ratio of the entirety
of the Mr. America contest, even well into the steroid era)
Arms : 19+"
Olympic Press (competition): 285lbs, straight backed, at 183

Olympic Press (exhibition): 364lbs, with a layback, at 221
Bench Press (training): 480lbs
Squat (training, but these were asshole scraping the floor style): 700+lbs in
his prime; 695 at 70 years of age
Deadlift (training): 600lbs
An absolute who's who of badassery- Milo Steinborn (the Steinborn Squat guy),
John Terpak, Mr. America Steve Stanko. 6'6", 265 lb Primo Carnera (the Bob
Sapp of that era), Olympic weightlifting phenom Stan Stanczyk and John
Grimek.
In other words, he was jacked as hell and stronger than King Kong on steroids,
pre-gear. Testosterone wasn't even synthesized until 1937, and steroids weren't
even introduced in the Eastern bloc until the 40's, so it's fairly certain that
Grimek was drug free for most, if not all, of his career.
His career included the following highlights:
● 1939 York Perfect Man
● 1940 Mr. America
● 1941 Mr. America

● 1946 Most Muscular Man In America
● 1948 Mr. Universe Short & Overall
1949 Mr. USAIn addition to that, Grimek regularly outlifted all of the members
of the Olympic weightlifting team and represented the US at the 1936 Olympics.
His utter resistance to training the quick lifts hamstrung him, though, and his
brute strength failed to give him enough poundage to put him higher in the total.
Despite that, Grimek managed to rep American muscle hard for the Krauts on
the world stage and let them know that if we lost the coming war, we'd at least
look damn good doing it. And Bob Hoffman, while pissed Grimek didn't place
better, had to give it to Grimek:
“[His total] is a lot of weight for any man, especially one who drives a
yellow roadster around and rarely trains [the Olympic lifts]. . . .
the man’s just too strong for words. He handles poundages over
300 easier than most lifters handle a hundred pounds less.”
Basically, this man was the unadulterated shit. How'd he get there? Training way
too goddamn much, by any modern natty bro's standard. Unlike the retarded
three day a week bullshit you will forever seen bandied about as his program
(which is frankly an affront to the man's memory), Grimek's training was never
the same from day to day, week to week, or year to year.
Training Outlined
● he typically trained five days a week, but occasionally trained six.
● a normal day's workout was typically not more than two hours, but
occasionally he'd train for four to five hours.
● he trained full body in each workout, because split systems didn't exist
yet.
● he rarely did the same exercises two days in a row, which drove Bob
Hoffman absolutely nuts.
● he loved odd lifts and would train everything from the Bavarian stone
lift to the bent press (for which he used 400 the first time he attempted it).
● his squat routines typically involved a hundred reps or more.
"That's the thing. If I felt I needed additional repetitions or additional

exercises, I did it. But if I felt, "Oh, the hell with it! I've had
enough of that," I would quit! See, there was no sense of a routine
that was stringent in any way, something that I felt I had to do.
The hell with it! I did what I wanted. If I started an exercise, and I
found that I didn't like it or need it that day, I just bypassed it."
When no one felt like lifting, they just made shit up like they were your average
noob New Year's Eve Resolution goof at your local big box gym.
● They invented a weird dumbbell version of the leg extension purely
out of boredom . "There were times when the lifters were not in a lifting
mood, so we thought up odd ways of training so we could still get a good
workout. One such way was to sit on a low bench, feet outstretched, and
lift up a dumbbell overhead that had been sitting between the legs. Sounds
easy but it wasn’t."
● Brad Castleberry wasn't the first motherfucker to stack dumbbells .

"My specialty was lifting two dumbbells with one hand. I gripped the
handle of one dumbbell while holding the other dumbbell with the heel of
my hand as it laid across the handle of the dumbbell I gripped. To do this
you should have a fairly thick palm, otherwise you just cannot hold it
securely. I must add that very few lifters were eager to try this stunt with
the heavy dumbbells. Even light weights were tricky for them. Eventually,
however, I managed a 90-pound dumbbell with an 85-pound dumbbell
lying across and held by the thickness of my palm."
● The did straight up stupid shit - the type of shit that'd get you kicked
out of these bitch-ass "hardcore" gyms that have proliferated although the
people lifting there are yuppie pussies and weak as fucking kittens.
o Shit like " dropping weights from an overhead position into the
crook of my arms , which many old-timers used in their stage
exhibitions. But if you caught it too far out on the forearms, it just
straightened your arms and crashed to the floor. That happened to
me at an exhibition. I jerked 305 pounds overhead and without much
thought made an effort to catch it into my arms. Instead it landed
slightly forward on my forearms, came down close on my thighs and
chaffed the skin down to the knees. I was bleeding. It was
embarrassing."
o "Another stunt was to drop a weight from overhead onto the
trapezius muscles behind the neck . If one’s timing is good, there’s
no problem, but otherwise it can be a big problem. I was practicing
this stunt with 245 pounds, lifting it overhead then dropping it onto
the back to balance it. Somehow while explaining it to one of the
visitors I bent forward a bit too much and the weight of the barbell
sent me crashing down to the platform with such speed I really
didn’t know what happened."
In other words, he was an utter badass who knew nothing of overtraining- he just
trained his ass off, and was a world champion as a result. Oh, well he must have
programmed, right? WRONG:
"Instead of always taking an exercise and repeating it in sets four,

five, six times, I often preferred, if I was working the arms, for
example, to do five, six or seven exercises that were different. I felt
that there were some deep-seated muscles that needed an extra
jolt. And the only way to get that jolt was to either exercise it from
another angle and see if you could make it function as fully as the
other part of that muscle was working. And that's what I always
tried to do. I did a lot of exercises for the same part of the body.
And it worked! At least it felt like it was working. That's why, when
people ask me how I trained, I can't think back right now and say,
"Oh, yeah, that was the one exercise I did which promoted
everything." No, I cannot say that, because I did a variety of
movements even for the same part of the body. And I would also
do what I felt like doing on that day."
Though we have no idea what Grimek's regular routines might have looked like,
we do know that the one set per exercise routine for arms he mentioned above
was. After every workout (i.e. 5-6 times a week), Grimek did one set of each of
these to failure in the range listed.
Two Hands Curl - 8-10 reps

Two Hands Press - 8-10
Two Hands DB Lateral Raise - 10-12
Two Hands Alternate DB Curl - 8-10

Two Hands Alternate DB Press - 8-10
Two Hands Barbell Row - 8-10
Alternate DB Forward Raise - 10-12

Barbell Wrist Curl - 10-12
One Arm Concentration Curl - 6-8

Incline Bench Barbell Curl - 6-8
One Arm Press - 6-8
Wrist Roller - 3 times each way.
The point of lifting when Grimek was involved was to be jacked and compete
with your friends. Gym lifts counted then, just as they do now- the difference
then was that there were no Redditors and "lifting gurus" calling bullshit on gym
lifts. As Grimek himself put it,
"We had a large iron block around the gym in those days and lifting it
with a pinch grip was quite a feat. Very few men in the gym could
handle it. It was about a foot high, six-inches wide with one end
slightly over three-inches thick and with the other side slightly
less; gripping it on the tapering end was rough. “Da Greep”
eventually could lift it and he began challenging anyone who was
interested. Steve Stanko and I got so we could clean it from the
floor to the shoulder. That stopped “Da Greep.” Later we even
succeeded in curling it.
One might ask, what’s so great about curling a 55-pound weight? Yes, a
53-pound dumbell cannot be considered any sort of feat, but
curling a tapering iron block of that weight is quite another thing.
Only those who have tried it know there is no comparison; and to
my knowledge no one else who tried it ever succeeded. We only
succeeded because we persisted in training to accomplish this
feat. And Stanko was then the best pinch-gripping lifter in the
gym. He would grasp a large 55-pound Olympic plate by the hub
and lift it with as much as 35 more pounds on top of it."
The kicker? What he was squatting at the age of 70:
"I've done many possible stupid and strange things. One of which was
squatting very heavy when I was between 74 and 75 (years of age)
but I NEVER strained or fought going down, deep and struggling
to raise up, never. In later years, say after the 30s (his age) when I
squatted, I always did HIGH reps, and the last time was in my late
70s, I did squats, just simply because I wanted to do some
training, but not the usual workout. One professional football
player (Philadelphia Eagles) was visiting the gym and no one else
wanted to train. He came up to see the guys train, but that I was
the only one, none of the others wanted to do anything, but I
needed a light workout, so I squatted.
I began with 225 lb. and did about 28 consecutive reps. Then I added
90lb more and did another 18 to 20 reps and continued in that
fashion, adding weight, while cutting the reps and always working
up to where I would do only one to three reps with 645lb usually,
but occasionally working up to 695lb [when he was over 70 years
of age, remember] and by then I already completed 75 to 80 reps.
But as mentioned, I never struggled, for some reason I felt that
was straining, avoiding that because I felt it did nothing for except
cause pain. The visitor looked at me when I was finished doing 20
reps with the second set of 315lb and asked, 'I thought you weren't
in the mood to train hard?' I said I wasn't, but what the heck,
squats are easy. He looked at me and said, 'I squat too, but on my
best days I could never do that.'"
John Grimek walked around at 195, not fat about it, at the age of 80 boast ing
upper pecs big enough to warrant an unbuttoned shirt. At 80 he was still training
an hour or two every other day, still squatting, and went out dancing late night
with his wife Friday, Saturday, and Sunday nights until 1AM.
And for those of you who eat like a goddamned bird- he was eating three big
chicken breasts every day at lunch. Don't skimp on the foot because you're afraid
of getting fat. Fear profits man nothing
Steve Merjanian- I’ve Got 500lb Incline and a Pair of
Speedos... Let’s Party
Steve Merjanian is likely a name you have never heard, because the man didn’t
really compete much. He trained with the guys at Westside and was a good
friend of Bill West and was always found in LA gyms in the 1950s-1970s. A
friend and training partner of the famed bodybuilder and Gold’s Gym manager
Zabo Koszewski, Merjanian was a legend in the bodybuilding and powerlifting
scene for his inhuman incline bench press of 500, as well as a 560 touch and go
bench press. On top of that, Merjanian could do an unsupported behind the neck
press with 405, and 335 for seven, which gave him the upper body size to have
bit parts in movies ranging from Planet of the Apes to Muscle Beach Party.
Because Merjanian lifted in a time when it wasn’t fashionable to talk shit about a
man who can bench more than you can squat about his unwillingness to train
legs, Merjanian didn’t, and was frankly no worse for it. As such, he enjoyed
every training session because he trained what he liked, and ignored what he
didn’t, and trained often, quickly, with a ton of volume, and harder than a furry’s
dick on the set of the Teletubbies.
Dumbbell Press- 5 x 7
Dumbbell Laterals - 5 x 7
Front Dumbbell Raise - 5 x 7
Pulley Rowing Motion - 5 x 7
Dumbbell Curl - 5 x 7
Dips - 5 x 7
Lying Triceps Extension - 5x7
60 Degree Incline Press – 10 x 7 ; then 7 x 1 using 20 lbs. less than max

(Brace yourself for this news- his first warmup was 350 x 10)
Bench Press - 5 x 7
Tuesday / Thursday / Saturday / Sunday
Calf Raise- 10-15 x 10 reps

Pulley Forearm Curl- 10-15 x 10
Face Pulls – 10-15 x 10

Standing Triceps Extensions – 10-15 x 10
Run – approximately one mile in the sand

Pat Neve- Bench Specialist Turned Bodybuilder
Turned Rich Motherfucker
Though all he does today is drive supercars and insanely expensive custom hot
rods, Arizona’s Pat Neve began his life as a bodybuilder with a badass, record
setting bench press. At 5’5” and 181lbs, Neve was the first man under 200lbs to
bench over 450lbs in competition. Under rules that required a two second pause
and had no flight system, Neve benched 468 at 181, then later bested that with a
gym lift of 490 while training for the Mr. America (which he won in 1975 and
1976).
Though Neve had bones so fragile he might as well have played Mr. Glass in the
M Night Shyamalan films, his training for powerlifting was incredibly heavy.
Six months out of the year he focused on building tendon and ligament strength
for powerlifting, then focused on hypertrophy and detail the other six for
bodybuilding. The following is the bench routine he used in his powerlifting
training to flirt with a 500 bench at 185lbs.
Tuesday and Saturday: Bench Training
Paused Bench Press - 10-15 sets that would looks something like this: 135lbs
x 10; 185 x 8; 225 x 8; 275 x 8; 335 x 6; 365 x 4; 405 x 4; 430 x 2 x 2
DB Bench Press - 180s x 4 x 6
Incline Bench Press - 225lbs x 10; 275 x 8; 315 x 6; 335 x 4; 335 x 2 x 2

Bench Press Lockouts - 540lbs x 4 x 6 (Neve's sticking point/fail point was
3/4 from lockout, rather than off his chest, so he used these to blast through
that point)
“That’s what life is. Life has its ups and downs. Life is not up all the time.
Bad things are going to happen and you’ve got to fight through
them.”- Pat Neve
Eddie Robinson- Essentially the WSM of the 1980s
Bodybuilding Scene
Known primarily as an IFBB pro bodybuilder, Robinson was also a powerlifter

who benched 600 at 220 in what seems to have been an unsanctioned meet
(though he competed against powerlifting badass Joe Ladnier), and a
competitive arm wrestler. Say what you will about bodybuilders, but the
builders in the 1990s were a pack of maniacs who were aggressive as rabid dogs
and strong enough to rip your arm off and beat you to death with it if they
wanted.
Eddie Robinson was that kind of bodybuilder- wilder than an entire hair metal
band, stronger than most of the lifters on the planet, and ready to throw around
weight at all times. His best competition bench was allegedly north of 600, but
the only confirmed competition bench puts him at 560lbs at 220, which is an
insanely good bench for a guy who was in no way, shape, or form a powerlifter-
he was just a guy who was so goddamn jacked and tan he had a compulsion to
show off at every opportunity.
And of note, Eddie did 45 to 60 minutes of some type of cardio prior to every
workout, because the man has a mission and that mission is to look like a
goddamn god when he pops his shirt off.
Monday: Abdominals, Chest, Triceps
Hanging Leg Raises - 4 x 25-30
Standing Bent Over Twists - 2 x 50
Bench Press (warmup) - 1 x 15
Superset
Bench Press - 4 x 10, 8, 8, 6

Flyes - 4 x 10, 8, 8, 6
Incline Press - 4 x 10, 8, 8, 6
Incline Fly - 4 x 10, 8, 8, 6
Decline Bench Press - 4 x 10, 8, 8, 6

Decline Flyes - 4 x 10, 8, 8, 6
Machine Flyes -2 x 15-20

Dips - 5 x 10
Pushdowns - 4 x 8-10
Rope Extensions - 4 x 8-10
Skull Crushers - 3 x 10-12

Tuesday: Abdominals, Back, Biceps
Deadlifts (warmup) - 1 x 15
Superset
Deadlifts - 4 x 10, 8, 8, 6
Cable Rows - 4 x 10, 8, 8, 6
Front Pulldowns - 4 x 10, 8, 8, 6
T-bar Rows - 4 x 10, 8, 8, 6
T-bar Rows (negatives) - 4 x 10

Wide Grip Preacher Curls - 3 x 10, 8, 8
Close Grip Preacher Curls - 3 x 10, 8, 8

Incline Curls - 3 x 10, 8, 8
Concentration Curls - 2 x 10-12
Wednesday: Off
Thursday: Abdominals, Quads, Hamstrings
Squats (warmup) - 1 x 15
Squats - 5 x 10, 8, 8, 6, 6
Leg Presses - 4 x 10, 8, 8, 6

Leg Extensions - 5 x 10, 8, 8, 6, 6
Leg Curls - 5 x 8, 8, 6, 6, 4
Barbell Lunges - 4 x 8, 8, 6, 6
Friday: Abdominals, Shoulders, Calves

Military Press (warmup)- 1 x 15

Military Press- 4 x 10, 8, 8, 6
Barbell Upright Rows - 4 x 10, 8, 8, 6
Lateral Raises - 4 x 10, 8, 8, 6

Seated Bent Over Lateral Raises - 3 x 10, 8, 8
Standing Calf Raises (warmup) 1 x 15
Standing Calf Raises (toes in)- 3 x 10

Standing Calf Raises (toes out)- 3 x 10
Seated Calf Raises - 3 x 10, 8, 8
Saturday and Sunday: Off

Doug Furnas- You Thought Jim Brown and Donald
Dinnie had Best All-Round Athlete on Lock?
Tragically, the name Doug Furnas is not well known to aficionados of strength,
though it seriously should be. Furnas was about as multi-sport as a person could
get- the “strongman” wrestler in the WWE, ECW, and AJPW, a badass in the
rodeo in high school and after retirement from wrestling; a seriously bruising
fullback back for U Tennessee known for playing fullback the way most people
played linebacker (and who in high school was the leading rusher in Oklahoma
and an apparently sick field goal kicker); and one of the greatest 275lb
powerlifters of all times (2412 single-ply total), who could also do a split or
backflip at and time, for any or no reason.
Monday: Legs
Squat - 7-10 x 2-8
Single Leg Press - 2 x 10-12
Single Leg Curl - 2 x 10-12
Leg Extensions - 2 x 10-12
Seated Calf Raise - 3 x 10-12
Abs - 3 x 20
Tuesday: Off
Wednesday: Chest
Bench Press - 7-10 x 2-8

Close Grip Bench (paused)- 2 x 2-8
Incline Press - 2 x 2-8
Pushdowns - 2 x 2-8
Abs - 3 x 20
Thursday: Shoulders
Behind the Neck Press - 5 x 2-8

Front Dumbbell Laterals - 3 x 10-12
Seated Lateral Raises - 3 x 10-12
Friday: Back
Deadlifts - 8 x 2-8
Stiff Leg Deadlift - 2 x 8-10
Bent Over Rows - 2 x 8-10
T-Bar Rows - 2 x 8-10
Chinups - 2 x 8-10
Pulldowns - 2 x 8-10
Bent Over Dumbbell Laterals - 2 x 8-10
Seated Calf Raises - 1 x 20
Abs - 3 x 20
Saturday: Light Chest and Arms
Light Wide Grip Bench Press - 3 x 8-10

Dumbbell Flyes - 2 x 10-15
Weighted Dips - 1 x 15
Triceps Extensions - 2 x 2-8
Barbell Curls - 1 x 20
Powerlifters
I like to think of powerlifting as a great idea gone horribly, horribly wrong, much
like cloning dinosaurs was in Jurassic Park. The sad part is that powerlifting
exists in the real world, and that no one has died as a result of those best laid
plans going awry. You see, powerlifting exists because at the outset of strength
sport in the early 20th Century, the French and English could not beat the
Germans in competitions, so they outlawed the techniques the Germans used,
like the “continental” and “pressing out” rather than jerking, and invented
modern weightlifting. That left a massive array of casually contested strength
events for “odd lifting” competitions, but those were so random and haphazardly
judged and contested that people lacked a good barometer for comparison…
because what’s the point if you can’t talk shit about your fellow man for their
comparative weakness. Thus, powerlifting arose basically as an outlet for
people to uncoordinated to master the quick lifts.
Powerlifting, as it originated, was fun as hell- a room jam-packed with

screaming, jacked weirdos trying to outdo each other on the simplest lifts the
human mind could conceive- the abled version of the Special Olympics.
Tragically, it’s gone a hell of a long way from that in an effort to imitate the sport
to which it was originally created as an alternative, and is a solemn, pretentious
sport bereft of the spirit in which it was originally intended.
So when you’re reading this, bear in mind that these guys were absolute
maniacs, virtually certifiable and utterly unlike the drudgery and absurd
hyperseriousness exhibited by most powerlifters today.
“I was handing off to Ted [Arcidi]when he was attempting to break Bill

Kazmaier’s raw bench record (661) with a 666 attempt. He missed
his first two when someone was giving him a snort of some
unknown (probably highly questionable) substance. On his third
attempt, I jammed a bottle of nose torque up his nose and he
smashed 666 breaking Bill’s record! Right after, he got up off the
bench, threw a chair off the balcony of the 4th floor of the meet
(landing in the middle of the highway below), then ran and put his
head through the wall.”
Brutally in Depth: The Compiled Methods of the
Original Culver City Westside Barbell Club
When people think of the men and women behind the curtain in the world of
powerlifting, names like Mark Rippetoe and Louie Simmons, Dave Tate and Jim
Wendler likely spring to mind. This is because powerlifting is about the most
fad-driven pastime this side of table-top gaming and 20-something women's
fashion, and because powerlifters are generally about as well educated as your
average Afghani herdsman. To say the majority of powerlifters are mentally
defective lemmings is like saying NBA players are shitty at hand to hand
combat, or that the average Redditor rates right around Hitler for value to
collective humanity, or that left wingers who love Tumblr could stand to toughen
the fuck up a little. You wouldn't know that speaking to one, however, because
most powerlifters seem to think they're the most hyper-analytical and well-
informed people to touch a weight since Einstein tripped over a dumbbell one
time in the dark. And this massive collective intellectual conceit, combined with
the faddism of the lifting world, is the reason why the name Bill "Peanuts" West
is not spoken in solemn tones in the hallowed halls of your local weight pit.
Bill West’s creation, the Culver City Westside Barbell Club, was a amalgamation
of the most interesting and diverse cast of characters in history, and their training
methodology reflected that desire to reject normalcy and really embrace their
inner Gonzo... though with less reported chicken fucking than that
characterization might seem to indicate. This was possible because Bill West
was like the Roger Bacon of powerlifting- though he is credited with inventing
methods and practices that he had no part in creating, he was the one that
brought those things to prominence by effectively combining them into a sort of
system no one else perceived. And in doing so, West's work in powerlifting is
very much like Roger Bacon's- wild-eyed enthusiasm for experimentation that
just so happened to yield incredible fucking results.
The Culver City Westside Barbell Crew
As has already been mentioned, the Westside Barbell Club was filled with a
wide array of weirdos from every walk of life. They included such powerlifting
luminaries as:
● Bill “Peanuts” West , hyper-dominant 198lb powerlifter and the driving

force of the LA powerlifting scene.
● Joe DiMarco , the silent driving force behind the OG Westside Club.
Though far from the strongest man in the club, he was the one to introduce
shit like box squats to the crew and was an avid proponent of pad presses
and the belly toss. Stuck between the superheavyweights (which at the
time was everything over 198, and Bill West's domination of that class,
DiMarco had trouble making room for himself in the limelight on such a
stacked team.
● As everyone knows (or you will learn later in this chapter), Pat Casey
was the first man to bench press 600; under Bill's tutelage Casey also
went on to become the first man to squat 800 and total 2000. In spite of the
fact Casey ran a health food store inside of the famed Bill Pearl's Gym, he
did all of his training in West's gym.
● Bill Thurber , American record holder in the bench press and total in
the 148s; under the steely eyed gaze of West, he went on to hold American
records in the squat, bench press and total in two weight classes, and
pulled 485 (and was apparently a beast at dips).
● Leonard Ingro , the first 181lber to to squat 500, and who pulled 540 in
competition at 165... which was fucking bizarre because the guy was
between 5'8 and 5'10".
● Superstar Billy Graham , jacked-as-hell 6’4” and 325lb pro wrestler,

powerlifter, and possessor or massive 22” arms. Graham was benching 605
when his lifting partner, Pat Casey, held the world record with 616.
● Gay bodybuilding biker of a world-renown powerlifting neurologist Dr.

Oliver Sacks , who pulled 620 in addition to a then record 600lb squat.
Sacks’ resume is beyond ridiculous- he has written a novel that was
adapted into a film starring Robin Williams that was nominated for an
Academy Award, has honorary doctorates from half of the universities on
the goddamn plane (including Georgetown and Tufts), received an
honorary JD in law from Oxford, and even has a minor planet named after
him.
● Olympian, multi-record-setting powerlifter, rock star track and field

athlete, and all around badass George Frenn , who organized the first
international powerlifting meet in history.
● World record holder in the hammer throw Hal Connolly . Connolly was
a better thrower than Frenn, so Frenn did everything he could to show up
Connolly on the platform, which led to some insane competition in the
gym, including Connolly hitting a 700 squat in training after hearing Frenn
did, when his training max appeared to be 550.
● Dallas Long , who won gold in the shot put in the 1960 Olympics,
trained with Bill exclusively and not with the rest of the crew, and as a
result could incline press 430.
● Douglas Aircraft engineers Jim Hamilton and Howard Einstein , who

pulled 550 and squatted 500, respectively. A Revenge of the Nerds-esque
pocket protector rocking nerd, Hamilton was one of the mathematicians
on the Apollo space mission and was at the time the youngest person ever
to have an office at the Pentagon.
● Two-time gold medalist in the shot put, Parry O'Brien , who inclined
345lbs and still holds a master's division record for putting the six kilo
shot.
● Olympian shot-putter Dave Davis , who was injured during the 1960
Olympics but who could incline 390. Though of no importance from a
lifting perspective, he was a juror in the infamous Rodney King case.
● Dave Ashman , world record holder in the snatch and clean and jerk,
was renowned for his front and back squat, and who could pull 730 with a
competition grip and 790 with straps.
● Dave Sheppard , silver medalist in Olympic weightlifting (and one of
the guys who got Muscle Beach shut down) who pulled 550 at 132 and
could do a fucking ridiculous eight sets of 2 in the strict press with 200lbs.
● Incline bench press specialist and overall monster of a man Steve

Merjanian , who inclined 500 and used 400 for behind the neck presses.
● A bodybuilder named Duke , who was a stand-in for Lou Ferrigno on

the Incredible Hulk and stood 6'3" 240. Duke was apparently a pro boxer
for a while, and though I have no information on his lifts, I can say that his
one knockout in life came at the hands of a caged orangutan who'd stolen
his sunglasses at a random hillbilly-owned gas station. Clearly, these men
were utter maniacs.
Though they likely didn't create any of these training methods themselves, they
were the first to combine these methods into a cohesive system for use by
competitive lifters. They also had the great good fortune, like the touch system
(spotter assisted reps), the box squat, cheating skullcrushers, the various and
sundry powerlifting aids they used, like wrapping themselves in sheets and
constructing their own knee and wrist wraps like they were seamstresses in a
Thai sweatshop, incline power rack bench presses, deficit deadlifts, lockouts,
and rack/box pulls.
With that list in mind, powerlifting would look about as different from its current
incarnation without the Bill West and the OG Westside Club as skinny CGI
Steve Rogers from the jacked Chris Evans version. Yeah, they're basically the
same guy, but the performance difference between the two would have an alien
thinking them to be two entirely different species of hominids.
Bill West's Original Training Methods
Just like anyone else who was bitten by the iron bug early and whose enthusiasm
and work ethic translated into serious gains, Bill West trained incessantly early
on in his lifting career. He made massive gains training six to seven days a week,
alternating upper and lower body days. His upper body workouts lasted as long
as three hours, and his lower body workouts clocked in at an hour and a half.
That method was actually wildly successful for West- so much so, in fact, that he
had to stop drinking milk during his workouts or he would have gained too much
muscle and tipped over into the heavyweight class.
Content with drinking water during his workouts as opposed to moo juice, West
thought he had the perfect system. He would soon discover otherwise, however.
Though that training style yielded massive gains on the platform, it fucked him
royally at home- all of the guys found that when they spent that amount of time
in the gym, they never heard the fucking end of it from their wives. As such,
they eventually switched to the two day a week system you see repeated as
though it is the Golden Ticket for strength- it was not his preference that led to
that split, but his unwillingness to listen to his wife scream at him nightly about
his incessant training. Keep that in mind the next time you see someone
advocating for minimalist training- it might just be they have no goddamn idea
what they're talking about.
The Basic Westside Routine
After the wives stepped in, the Westside guys cut their training down to a mere
8-10 hours a week. Training (officially) twice a week in four to six hour sessions
(along with two optional, shorter workouts), they basically blew the doors off
every goddamn record they touched. Everyone who was anyone wanted to train
there, and they came from all over to do so. As such, the gym was packed and
their workouts were longer than Avengers: Endgame every single time they
touched a weight.
Tuesday
Bench Press - Around 12 sets, working up to doubles and triples; then 2 x 10 for
a pump
Belly Toss Bench Press - 4-6 x 3

Incline Bench - 12 sets, reps from three to six for around half the sets, then
singles for the rest
High Box Squats - work up to a heavy set of singles, using 100lbs over your
contest weight. George Frenn used 1000lbs for singles to set up for his record
breaking 853lb squat
Low Box Squats - 4-5 singles with 100lbs less than your contest squat
Rack Pulls/Box Deadlifts - 5-6 singles
Lat Pulldowns - 3 x 5 (seriously heavy)
Tricep Pushdowns - 3 x 5 (as heavy as humanly possible)
Overhead Work - Heavy triples, doubles and singles. Not everyone did these- it
was mostly the Olympian throwers who did this.
Cleans and High Pulls - these were usually done competitively between lifters,
for a max effort
Everyone added whatever they needed to onto this workout, as you'll see (and
saw in the George Frenn articles). Whatever didn't get added here could also get
pushed to the Wednesday and Sunday workouts.
Wednesday
Optional light day.
Saturday
At least twice a month, everyone maxed out on the 3 lifts, then went home. This
wasn't as easy as it sounds, though, because twenty to thirty guys would show up
on any given Saturday. Problem was, 20-30 guys would show up, it would take
from around noon until about 6PM.
If the guys weren't having a full meet day, they'd work the three lifts using
methods described below. Either way, once the lifting was done, they started
drinking, likely at the restaurant with the all you can eat prime rib and cheep
pitchers I mentioned earlier in the series.
Sunday
Optional light work day.
The Add-Ons
"The whole idea of assist movements is to search out weaknesses

and destroy them. The power lifters of the Westside Barbell Club
conduct a constant search to learn more about building power.
They are ready to try any innovation, and always seem to find time
and energy for a new experiment. They are dedicated to making
ever greater lifts. " -Armand Tanny
As with any program, nothing should just be Plug-n-Play when it comes to
programming. Every program, no matter how allegedly comprehensive it might,
can address the needs of each individual as they arise. There will always be a
need for customization, and as we saw in the George Frenn series, the Westside
crew were more obsessed with customization than a 16-year-old who loves Call
of Duty and the Fast and the Furious equally.
The Rack Pull / Box Deadlift
West and the Westside crew utilized this movement to prevent deadlift fails just
below the knee. They did the following program once a month, pulling from an
inch to an inch and a half below their knees during their Tuesday workout, or a
supplementary Wednesday workout.
The "high deadlift" program was basically just a gradual progression toward a
max attempt that must be done with straps. As Bill West put it,
"When you start the pull, nothing seems to happen for several long
moments. You keep turning on more and more power, and then
finally the bar begins to move off the blocks. Without the grip to
think about you can pull hard and long until you are fully erect. In
one long big effort like this you have the equivalent, or more, of a
whole set of heavy reps. It builds back muscle."
To give you an idea of the progression, it would look something like this: 550 x
1; 585 x 1; 625 x 1; 660 x 1; 690 x 1 (with straps).
Snatch Grip Deadlift Day
Bill West, like myself and the modern Westside crew, never trained the deadlift
in the gym. Instead, West added a third day of training, doing some snatch grip
deadlifting on Wednesdays.
"By building the muscles from angles, the official movements are
improved. We understand that the high dead lift improves the final
phase of the pull. With the snatch grip, on the other hand, the
initial phase is improved. The back is in a deeper bent-over
position, from a full powered standpoint slightly at a
disadvantage, but building strength at this point completes the
whole back picture. Strength exists through the entire range of
back lifting. Bill uses this style for most of his dead lift training.
Except for the High Dead Lift day once a month, he works the
Snatch Grip Dead Lift every Wednesday."
Snatch Grip Deadlift - 4 x 3 (increasing the weight on each set); 2x3 (heavier,
and with straps). A typical progression might be 225x3; 315x3; 425x3; 500x3;
525x3 and 550x 3 using straps.
Sumo Deadlift - 3 x 1 (87%1RM) This is (at least for a history nerd like me)
fascinating, because I didn't know sumo deadlifts were even legal at that time.
West called it a "close grip deadlift," and although Peary Rader claimed in 1976
to have done the lift in the mid-1950s, I haven't seen a pic of them that predates
the 70s.
"Notice that the last three singles are done with a close grip. The
elbows are inside the knees. Actually, the legs are spread wider
than normal. Again, this variation strengthens the leg pull from
the wide position. It becomes obvious that a theory emerges that
prohibits the existence of any weak spots. By closing the gaps,
there is no chance for power to leak out. It is like military
strategy: For every man at the front, you have 10 men supporting
him at the rear."
Deficit Deadlifts
Another favorite of West and George Frenn, these helped with breaking the
weight off the ground for big pulls. After having his national record of 713
smashed by Gary Young, Frenn looked into Young's training and discovered that
Young did high rep deficit deadlifts on a regular. Young had also had pulled 685
standing on a low box, so Frenn discussed it with West and started hammering
singles on the deficit deadlift.
It didn't do a goddamn thing for him. He tried more singles, then he tried fewer.
Singles weren't working, so he decided that if he could pull 600 for 10, he'd be
able to smash through the 725lb barrier... which just killed his deadlift altogether.
Once he dropped the weight even further, however, his deadlift blew up. With
the program below, Frenn pulled 725 within three weeks, 740 within five weeks,
and became a consistent 750-800lbs puller.
Tuesday
Deficit Deadlift - worked up to 3 x 10 60%1RM. His feet just fit under the bar
with 45's on it, and from the side, his chest is just about touching his thighs at the
start position.
Saturday
Deadlift Warmup - Triples up to 495.
Deadlift - Singles with 565, 635, then work to a daily max and do three singles
with that weight. No more than three singles with any weight.
High Pulls / Power Clean
George Frenn was an absolute monster on the high pull, but (like me) could
never manage to get his arms underneath the bar for a clean (one of many
reasons he chose powerlifting over Olympic lifting). Frenn believed that high
pulls were a fan more effective movement than cleans for this reason- the brute
strength they require translated nicely to the deadlift and required none of the
skill and flexibility that the clean did. If a lifter can do them with big weights,
however, Frenn sees no reason to replace them with high pulls.
Cleans and/or Snatch Grip and/or Clean Grip High Pull - 4-9 x 3-5
Good Mornings
Another great assistance exercise for Tuesday and Wednesday workouts.

Good Mornings - 4-9 x 3-5 (Frenn used about 60% of his squat 1RM for these)
Box Squat in the Power Rack
After nearly killing himself walking out a heavy squat attempt when fatigued
one day, Bill West had an epiphany. The kind of epiphany when one wakes up in
the hospital and thinks, 'it's pretty fucking hard to train for 15 hours a week when
you're lying in a hospital bed with no beer and no prime rib." As he lay there, he
realized that the typical weightlifting power rack wasn't up to the task he was
about to set before it, because the dimensions were all wrong. As such, a plan
began to form in his mind.
"The box squat required a lot of horizontal movement, so he

decided to widen the fore-and-aft distance between the two
crossbars to 16 inches and lengthen by several inches the three-
quarter inch steel bars that served as elevation pins. In this way
he could take the bar from a sitting position on the bench and
come erect with plenty of clearance. With this in mind Bill built
the power rack you see in the accompanying photos. The holes in
the uprights are spaced 1¼ inches between the circumferences.
The uprights stand eight feet high.
His box is a milk crate beefed up with two-by-fours making it
perfectly rigid and still fairly light. It is virtually indestructible. It
stands 18-and-a-half inches high which puts Bill himself (5'8") in
a sitting position about 1½ to 2 inches above a parallel squat.
This position seemed reasonable for a good bench squat."
The whole point of the exercise is to start the lift from a full sitting
position. Let the buttocks roll back, and in a continuous movement
start forward and up again. You lose the effect if you don't settle
into it all the way. If you only sit on the leg biceps, you get too
much rebound from the muscle when it contracts. The spotter, as
an added advantage, can help the lifter do forced reps by just
touching the bar. Even where only a regular squat rack is
available an assistant can help the lifter get started on box squats,
but extremely heavy weights would not be recommended."
West had observed that Paul Anderson's squat lockouts, as well as his own, had
done exactly fuckall for his full squat. yeah, they made the walkout far easier,
and he noticed more stability, but the squat itself was unaffected. Thus, he
designed the box squat to be a three-quarter competition squat. Using this as one
of his two squat sessions a week, he'd be able to use supramaximal weights in
one and then coast off those weights in the second- his full squat would feel far
easier as a result. After some experimentation he found he was able to go far
harder in both sessions by alternating the two, and began box squatting in his
Tuesday workout and full squatting in his Saturday session.
"From this mishap he learned one everlasting lesson, and that was
never to take any more steps than necessary with a really heavy
weight on the shoulders."
Tuesday
Warmup Sets - 2 x 7; 2 x 5; 1 x 3
Work sets - 7 x 1; Drop the weight 100 pounds x 10 reps; drop 100 more x 10.
Bill West's Balls Out Bench Press Routine
True to form with the Westside Guys, this didn't fit their typical mold, but neither
did that pastiche of bizarrely lovable weirdos. This routine would be followed
twice a week, plus a lighter benching day thrown into the middle of the week.
The crucial point here is to find a repeatable number for a near max single and
pound the hell out of it.
When you're using this routine, make sure you move the bench to the beginning
of the workouts, so you hit it fresh. You'll do this for 6-8 weeks straight, going
for a daily max or near daily max in each workout, then take a week or two off
the program, hitting a less intensive bench workout for a couple of weeks, before
resuming it.
The Heavy Days
Bench Press - 1 x 10; 8; 6; 4; 1; 1; 1; 1 (same weight used for each).
The Lighter Day
Bench Press - 1 x 10; 8; 6; 3; 1; 10 (last set is a light burnout/pump set)
The Westside Triceps Slaughterhouse

"The history of weight training has proved to be a constant game
of hide and seek. Truant muscles are no longer safe from the
prying efforts of modern power lifters. In the case of the bench
press, the triceps, with its natural capacity for development,
became suspect when it appeared to be riding on the efforts of the
delts and pecs.
At first, no one could say for sure. Maybe it was the delts. So,
they tried military presses. They didn't prove to help the bench a
great deal. So, they tried parallel dips with plenty of weight. Pat
Casey did them endlessly, dropping to an extremely low position,
but they ground up his shoulders, and he stopped. Extreme range
of motion like the military and dip was out; the pecs and delts
were out. That left the triceps."
"Thus comes into being the 'Triceps Power Cheats,' a movement
that is spanking the triceps into unprecedented effort and routine
[bench press] records up the line. The movement flanks the
regular bench press on the alternate workout of the week in which
the bench press and [box squats]. In terms of two workouts a
week, Saturday (heavy) and Tuesday, the power cheats fall on
Tuesday." - Chuck Sipes
Training with the Westside crew on occasion, 570lb bencher at 220 and only
bodybuilder to defeat Arnold, Chuck Sipes, uncovered two insanely effective
bench press assistance exercises- the Pullover Triceps Cheat and the Power Rack
Triceps Lockout. Done twice a week with one of two methodologies, Sipes and
other huge benchers of the time considered these exercises critical for a massive
bench. Depending on your preference, you can use the Bill West style for this,
Pat Casey's style, or some combination thereof. However, you do them, the best
bencher under 240lbs for decades thought both styles had merit.
Tuesday/Friday
Pullover Triceps Cheat (Bill West Method)- 135 x 10; 185 x 5; 205 x 5; 205 x
1; 255 x 6 x 1. West would put a folded towel on the bench a few inches over his
head and do his pullovers from that point, heaving the weight up over his eyes
and then bouncing it off the bench in between reps so he could handle bigger
poundages.
Pullover Triceps Cheat (Pat Casey Method)- 135 x 10; 225 x 5; 275 x 5; 305 x
3; 325 x 1; 340 x 1; 355 x 1; 370 x 1; 325 x 1; 305 x 1; 275 x 8. Casey was the
only human on the planet benching more than Sipes, and he used this method-
he'd have the loaded barbell on the floor off the end of the bench, hooks his feet
around the supports for stability, starts the movement as a pullover off the floor
and continues it as an extension to the top. Per the picture it looks like a
pullover and press, but from the description it sounds like you're using lat
strength and momentum to get the bar moving and then finish it like you did a
skull crusher from just over the top of your head.
Power Rack Triceps Lockout (Bill West Method)- 135 x 10; 150 x 10; 170 x 7
x 7. On an incline bench set at a 60-degree incline, take the barbell out of the
rack with a grip about six inches apart and do short range skull crushers from
just above your forehead to lockout. Your upper arm should stay in the same
vertical plane as the bar.
Power Rack Triceps Lockout (Pat Casey Method)- 225 x 6 x 7. Casey did these
slightly differently, setting the pins in the power rack just above forehead level
and pressing off the pins. He did these quickly, for a pump.
Seated French Presses / Overhead Extensions (as a high rep burnout)- 3 x 10.
Of note, Sipes basically thought you were a pink-bitch pussy if you used the
cambered bar on tricep work and that you were basically just wasting your
fucking time, so give the Olympic barbell a shot for these and see how they work
for you.
The Touch System
Settle down, you fucking perverts- it wasn't that awesome. The touch system is
actually the tried-and-true handsy spotter method that all of the world now
decries as useless bodybuilding bullshit, because if there is one thing the internet
can be trusted to do, it's to fuck up any good thing so irreparably that Brie
Larson's press junkets for Captain Marvel would look like a successful PR
campaign by comparison. Seriously- partner assisted reps are a great way to get
through sticking points if done correctly, and the Westside club did just that.
According to Bill West, the
"first thing we learned was that the Touch System was ineffective
on the bench press when the lifter used a weight he could not start
from his chest by himself. A sense of defeat is promptly established
when the weight is too heavy to budge. The positive approach
must prevail. The bar must be off the chest at a point where the
mind is firing a massive volley of impulses to the muscles in the
attempt to pass the sticking point. There is a moment of truth
where the bar is about five inches off the chest, where the simple
touch of a finger under the middle of the bar acts in some magic
way to keep the bar raising to arms’ length. Of course, there is a
good deal more to it than that. For one thing, it doesn’t work for
two strangers. The people using this system must know each other
– their strong points, weak points, sticking points and
idiosyncrasies. An almost symbiotic relationship exists. It gets to
where a simple command, 'Go, Baby!' in the middle of a lift means
everything in the world. A nod, a word a touch – they all mean
something. How do they get that way? By training together, by
having a common purpose. They depend on each other. And more,
they’ve got to have that feel of a heavy weight oozing out to arms’
length, regularly, a compulsive effort that by another expression
means they are 'hooked.'”
In short, this is mostly mental assistance- it's not so much the help the spotter is
providing but the belief in the help they're providing that keeps the bar moving.
To use it is simple- you work up to a heavy single, something the lifter can get
for a single or two, and do six singles there, with the spotter "riding with" the
lifter throughout each of the singles. Though in the picture he's only using a
finger, in practice West would grip the bar with both hands and make it look like
he was giving a lot of help, even though he was barely touching the bar. This
gave the lifter faith in his ability to keep the bar moving.
Bench Press - 135 x 10 warmup; 225 x 10; 315 x 5; 355 x 3; 385 x 2; 405 x 6
singles
West's crew used them on the squat as well, utilizing the box squat weight for
full squats with the spotter's help. Frankly, that sounds fucking exhausting for the
spotter, but West insisted it is what gave the entire Westside crew the ability to
break record after record in meets.
"The assistant stands directly behind the squatter and grasps the
bar with both hands. As the squatter begins to come out of the
bottom position, the assistant applies the aid. His hands never
leave the bar till the squatter is again erect. With perfect timing
the assistant learns to give a slight tug at the perfect moment in
coming out of the bottom position, allowing the lifter to build
momentum and pass the sticking point."
Tuesday Workout
Regular Squat - 3 x 10 x 395
Bench Squat - 2 x 15 x 475
Saturday Workout
Squat (Touch System)– 3 x 10 x 475
One of the two spotters is Bill West, though I don't know which, and big Steve
Merjanian is the one inclining 405 (though he maxed at 500 on the incline).
Incline Power Rack Presses
"Power rack training is a cultural necessity. You will be left

behind without it. The greats all employ it at one time or another.
It has helped make champs like Bill West. Leonard Ingro and
George Frenn. The power rack is what helped give Pat Casey the
ability to take 590 pounds from the flat bench rack, unassisted,
and make a perfect Bench Press with it. " - Armand Tanny
As I've mentioned in my articles on Westsiders in the past, the incline bench

press was the most hotly contested lift in Muscle Beach in the 1960s, and their
numbers should have everyone this side of Hafthor and Larry Wheels
considering seppuku as a result. All of the Westside guys had crazy incline
presses, and what made them even more impressive is that because of the lack of
stanchions on most incline benches, they either cleaned the weight and fell back
into the bench, then pressed from their chest, or they had the weight handed to
them by spotters and pressed from the chest. That's right- Merjanian did a pre-
steroid era bottom position incline bench press with 500 lbs. And he wasn't the
only one moving weight on the incline.
● Weightlifter Bill March, at 210, could press 375
● Heavyweight Dave Davis did 390
● Olympic thrower Dallas Long pressed 430 at 260

● 245lb Olympic thrower Parry O’Brien pressed 345.
● Pat Casey did 3 reps with 220 pound dumbbells on a 40 degree incline
and 7 with the 200s, plus he pressed 385 on an 80 degree incline. He has
also done seven reps with a pair of 200’s.
● Bodybuilder and medical doctor John Gourgott, who took second in the
Mr. America, pressed 325 from chin level off the power rack on the 80-
degree incline. at 200lbs.
The Westside guys had another reason to incline press, however. According to
Armand Tanny,
"Incline Power Rack Pressing, then, is another way of intensifying

effort. On the weekly basis of training where the Bench Press flat
is done on Tuesday and Saturday a reserve power can be tapped
in a different, and secondary, area by using the incline. Since
heavy flat Bench Pressing two days in a row would only lead to
exhaustion, the idea of attacking the muscles on another quarter
proved to be correct. Intermediate areas in the pressing range of
motion are weak.
The power rack acts as a sort of a booster station. The initial

impulse to boost the bar off the chest was suspected of weakening
as the barbell went up. Why should the bar rise, say five inches
from the chest, from an initial maximum explosion to come
toppling back? If it went up five inches, why couldn’t it have gone
up all the way?
Over at the West Side Barbell Club in Culver City, California, not
too long ago they began to suspect this common condition. They
were losing too many presses after getting the bar halfway up.
Down it come, a total loss. A flaw existed in the machine. To
repeat the process meant only to be practicing their mistakes.
There was no margin for error. They could raise their butt off the
bench and complete the lift, but that meant practicing another
mistake. What then?"
What they came up with was ingenious- incline bench pressing at three different
angles, off the pins. Form on these were insanely strict- no bouncing off the pins,
no lifting your ass. This exercise was the closest thing on Earth to sacrosanct to
the Westside crew, save for perhaps beer, and they treated it with the utmost
reverence and respect.
Incline Bench at 50 degrees, with the bar at chin level in the power rack
(about 5 inches off the chest)- the sets and reps varied, but it was something like
135 x 10; 185 x 5; 225 x 3; 270 x 4; 295 x 1; 315 x 5 singles
Incline Bench at 50 degrees, with the bar at eye level (about 7½ inches off the
chest)- No warmup; 5 singles with 300
Incline bench at 80 degrees, with bar at chin level - No warmup; 220 x 1; 235
x 1; 245 x 1; 255 x 1; 2 singles with 270. They would also occasionally end with
three sets of ten with varying weights on this incline and level for a pump.
And like with any other method, the Westside Crew's only rule was that there are
no fucking rules. They adapted their training to their time constraints, energy
levels, and mood on any given day, which was a far cry from the ridiculous
adherence to programs and dogmatic defense thereof you'll find out of "lifters"
who can't lift but two things- jack and shit. And Jack left town.
"The procedure on these exercises is not necessarily rigid.

Remember, these are supplemental exercises to be varied to suit
your private stamina. If you happened to work extremely hard on
positions 1 and 2, nothing says you can’t ease up on the third
position by simply doing a light 4 sets of 10 reps. Also, you may
prefer to limit this routine to once a week. A lot depends on your
time and energy."
And there you have all of the assorted tricks and shortcuts the original Westside
Barbell Club utilized in order to revolutionize powerlifting. The combination
proved deadly to their opposition and led to their adoption by just about every
badass barbell club on the planet thereafter, including the far more famous
current incarnation of the Westside Barbell Club, under Louie Simmons.
If you're wondering, then, how Bill West's name isn't on the lips of every lifter,
and how it could possibly be that no one has really codified the OG Westside's
methods the way I have, it's likely because Bill West met a rather ignominious
end, dying homeless, of a heroin overdose, on the beach in Santa Monica. He
was buried in a pauper's grave in the 1980s, and it wasn't until recently that
anyone had even erected a marker to commemorate the man's life.
To the posturing internet "lifters" who work menial jobs and still live with their
parents, the man's end indicate that his life was not well lived, and that his
methods were therefore unsound. That is because they have not lived, know
nothing of achieving a seemingly impossible goal and having no idea where to
go from there- their opinions are as meaningless as their lives. Bill West was
certainly many things, but a man to be forgotten, he was not.
Lest we end this story on a depressing note, here's one more tidbit to clue you in
on exactly how insane the OG Westside crew really was. Though I realize that
the tale of the Westside crew seems like it's jam-packed with more bullshit-filled
tall tales than any other strength series ever written, I assure you that all of the
tales of obscene strength have been true (at least insofar as I can ascertain
through research).
That stated, what I am about to relate next comes direct from Armand Tanny,
who in addition to being a bodybuilder, was a strength author and bodybuilder
with serious bonafides to his name. The actor in question, who's pictured below,
was reputed to have destroyed strength legend Chuck Ahrens in arm wrestling
around the same time that Ahrens was defeating entire professional football
teams, in a row, in that sport. Dan Vadis was one of the many jacked dudes to
play Hercules over the years, and though he was a pretty boy, was no pussy, and
was well known in muscle beach for being a strong dude. Both of the guys in
this story trained with the Westside crew at times, as the "Ashman" mentioned is
Dave Ashman, who was a member of the US Olympic weightlifting team with
Ike Berger (who started Bill West in odd lifting).
Dan Vadis, looking Ryan Reynolds if Reynolds trained with the Westside crew.
Unfortunately, he also died of a heroin overdose in the 80s.
"Doug Jamey, an Ashman contemporary weighing 165, did what was considered
the grittiest display of back power ever made. Using wrist straps, you might say
he was literally welded to the bar, he did three repetitions with 700. He hunched
each rep every inch of the way. It looked like pop art in motion, the way his
skeleton stretched and bent, a living impossibility. As an encore, he stood in front
of the bar and did three reps from behind. At a bodyweight of 159 he did a
continental clean of 400, inching it up his front in the same fantastic, drawn-out
display of power. Theatrics of this sort naturally invited a bit of upstaging. Dan
Vadis, now starring in European movies, challenged Doug to a finger twisting
contest. It broke Doug's finger. Shortly after, Doug decided to walk to Alaska.
With full pack and barefooted he said goodbye and started walking north up the
beach from Santa Monica. No one has heard tell since, but no one doubts he
made it."
Stefi Cohen- The Deadlifting GOAT’s Squat Training
Stefi Cohen, for those of you who don’t know, is a 123lb collegiate soccer
player, Florida State weightlifting gold medalist, and powerlifter who could rip
off your arms, beat you unconscious with them, then stuff them up your ass and
work you like a sock puppet to amuse herself until you finally quit breathing.
At 123lbs, she out-totals at least 75% of Reddit’s assorted lifting subreddits

(1278.6lb total, 507-242.5-529.1), and her deadlift is brutal enough that she’ll
make people forget Lamar Gant’s name before she quits competing (and if
you’ve already forgotten him, he was a little dude with scoliosis who pulled a 5x
bodyweight 688 at 132).
The best part is that after the armchair experts of the internet deemed her a one
trick pony because of her ridiculous pull, she blew into town and dropped a
wrapped 507 squat on them. Part of her secret for being such a well-rounded
strength athlete is knowing how to pick her weights- in an interview with athlete
daily, Cohen stated that she will never miss a max attempt.
“The only weight I’m ever going to put on the bar is a weight that I’m
going to 100 percent be convinced that I’m able to do. I won’t put
the bar down unless I’ve made a bad call and it pulls me back
down. I’m going to keep pulling until I can’t, because I convinced
myself before I did the lift anything I put on the bar I’m going to
make.”
And to those retards out there incessantly quoting Ronnie Coleman during lifts
and screeching “light weight, baby,” Cohen would like you to keep your teeth
together.
“It pisses me off when people are like “light weight, baby” when you go
up to a heavy bar. It’s not going to be light, you are going to put
that weight on your back or pull it from the ground and it’s going
to be fucking heavy. And you’re going to have to find a way to lift
it anyway.”
A Squat Session with Stefi Cohen
As I gather it, not all of her sessions are identical, and she apparently adheres to
a fairly rigid program created by her powerlifting and weightlifting coaches.
Nevertheless, this session is definitely enlightening, as are her methods (and
hopefully she doesn’t take too much umbrage with being included in an anti-
programming manifesto, given her amusingly extreme distaste- which is likely
professionally motivated- for program hopping).
Squat - bar x 6; 145 x 4; 235 x 4; 325 x 4; 375 x 1 (uses this to test out her
strength for the day, rep was done extremely slowly); 415 x 1 (the week prior
she had done a triple at that weight, but because that one was so brutal she cut
off her sets there.
Of note: When squatting, Cohen deliberately descends with a pace that can
best be described as glacial, which is surprising for a former weightlifter.
Her reasoning behind the ridiculously slow descent is that she believes it
engages all of the muscle groups more intensely, which in turn drastically
improves her stability and forces them to fire harder out of the hole. Given
her rapid improvements in the squat, it might be worth a try.
Pause Squat - 335 x 4 with a 1-2 second pause; 355 x 4 1-2 second pause
Barbell Sissy Squat - 3 x 8 x 225 (this is an old school exercise that is really
cool to see included in a powerlifting session. She put ten pound plates under
her heels, with her stance so narrow her feet were almost touching, and squatted
ass to grass)
Doug Young- The Bench Press Badass the Internet
Loves as a Muscle Bear
D oug Young is one of those guys, like Roger Estep, that even the most
homophobic, pickup truck driving, gun totin’, MAGA hat ownin’, Texan would
look at and say, “yeah, I’d suck that guy’s dick.” Basically embodying
everything about a man that another man could covet, Doug Young was a human
in the form of a Dodge Viper-Humvee-Bear Syfy style chimera who was the first
person under 300lbs to bench press over 500, and he managed to pack on 80lbs
of rip in eight months to do it, training nothing but upper body.
Legendary 8 Month Bench Specialization Routine

Throughout the aforementioned eight month period, Young was every bit the
bench bro. This is what he did, three times a week, to become masturbation
material for every “straight” powerlifter who has ogled him since.
Bench Press - 135 x 12; 225 x 6; 325 x 2; 375 x 2; 425 x 1; 465 x 1; 485 x 1;
500 x 1; 515 x 1; 530 x 1; 540 x 1; 540 x1; 490 x 9; 300 x14
Front Raise - 3 x 15
Skullcrushers - 6 x 6
Stiff-Arm Pulldowns - 6 x 6
Cable Crossovers - 6 x 6
One-Arm Concentration Curls - 6 x 6
One Arm Rows - 6 x 6

If he was sore, he’d go for doubles rather than singles. The only leg and back
work he did was four or five singles in the squat every ten days, and six or seven
singles in the deadlift every 15 days. In eight months, his arms ended up almost
20” and his chest was 60”.
Roger Estep- If You’re Gonna Lift Big Weights, You
Might as Well Look Good Doing It
Much like Doug Young, Roger Estep has been the “no homo” man crush of the
powerlifting world for the last 40 years. Though he looks every bit like a
bodybuilder, Roger Estep never competed in anything but powerlifting, in spite
of Joe Weider’s attempts to get him into the sport and encouragement by Frank
Zane. Thus, at 198lbs, Roger Estep basically boasted the best and strongest
physique on the planet under 200lbs.
Maybe the craziest thing about Estep is the fact that he put 424lbs onto his total
in 4 years- in his first meet he only managed a 1520 total, but when he won the
World’s, he did it with a 1944 and a wrapped 769 squat. Tragically, he actually
hit 815 in the gym the week prior and couldn’t replicate that at the meet, but
sometimes shit just doesn’t work out the way you’d like it to. That is a nice
segue into his training however, because clearly it was ridiculously heavy, at all
times. And when I say ridiculously heavy, I mean maximal or supramaximal
weights (for forced reps) at basically every session, no matter how shitty, sore or
tired he might have been feeling. This, in turn, led to a hell of a lot of injuries,
but it also led to a hell of a lot of success.
You’ll notice Estep was big on box squats, and that was due to his summer in
California spent training with George Frenn and Bill West. After training with
the Westside guy, Estep took their methods back to his gym in Ohio, where he
and his crew, “The Wild Bunch,” put them into practice and used them to
become one of the most formidable powerlifting teams on the planet.
Monday
High Box Squat - Light warmup, followed by 90lb jumps to a work weight that
is 50-75lbs over his best max squat. He'll use that weight for a single set of 10 on
a high box, though if his knees were giving him shit, he'd cut that to 7. After a
light warmup set he takes 90-lb. jumps to a poundage 50-75 lbs. over his best
max squat single and goes for 10 reps.
Low Box Squat - Using a box height that put him 2-3 inches below parallel he'd
take 100lbs off his 1RM and rep out.
Bench Press - 4 singles followed by an AMRAP pump set
Good Mornings -3 x 10
Leg Curl - 3 x 10
Random Bodybuilding Shit
Wednesday
Squat - Work up to a max set for ten reps. Later on in his career he'd just work
up to a single rep about a hundred pounds off his max, to grease the groove, as
Pavel put it.
Deadlift - Work up to a max set for ten reps, without straps.

Leg Curl - 3 x 10
Snatches and Cleans (On occasion)
Friday
Squat - Four singles, competition style, treating each attempt like it was a meet.
Bench - Four singles, competition style, treating each attempt like it was a meet.
Deadlift - Four singles, competition style, treating each attempt like it was a
meet.
Leg Curl - 3 x 10
"Train hard… party hard… makes the body hard." - Roger Estep
Jeremy Hoornstra- Sometimes Benching More Than
You Squat is Cool as Shit
Though it’s fairly certain Jeremy Hoornstra gets endless shit from his training
partners and friends because he benches considerably more than he squats or
pulls, I can imagine it’s done with a level of respectfulness you generally
wouldn’t see otherwise, because getting punched by a man that strong is likely
going to be fatal. Hoornstra broke Mike McDonald's 33 year old raw bench
record at 242 with 661 press after nipping at its heels for a bit, and has since hit
675 in what looks like an effort to be the first human being under 300lbs to
bench 700 raw. Hoornstra competes in both bodybuilding and powerlifting,
sports arms big enough to make you consider heaving yourself off a goddamn
cliff, and is the 242lb and 275lb world record holder in the bench.
Amusingly, Hoornstra's bench press routine is exactly what you'd expect from a
bodybuilder- there’s a reason bodybuilders out-bench the powerlifters in most
gyms. Surprisingly, it's not done on International Bench Press Day (Monday),
nor is it followed by a bit of biceps, just to get a pump on before the club.
Instead, Hoornstra's split is a two-sessions-a-day schedule that looks like this:
Monday - Back, Cardio (night)
Tuesday - Chest, Traps and Forearms (night)

Wednesday - Biceps, Cardio (night)
Thursday - Shoulders, Calves and Abs (night)
Friday - Triceps, Cardio (night)
Saturday - Legs
Yes, biceps get their own day. No stranger to volume, Hoornstra's throwing
around a lot of weight for a shitload of reps with a variety of angles when he hits
bench day, and rests no more than three minutes between sets. A typical
workout looks something like this, but according to Hoornstra it varies greatly
with his mood and enthusiasm:
Flat Bench Press - 225 x 15; 315 x 10; 405 x 10; 495 x 8; 585 x 3; 635 x 2; 405
x AMRAP
Incline Bench Press - 315 x 10; 405 x 8; 495 x 5; 495 x 5
Incline Dumbbell Flyes - 3 x AMRAP x 140 (they’re the heaviest dumbbells

the gym has)
Flat Cable Flies - 3 x 10 x stack
Hammer Strength Chest Press - 2 x AMRAP X as much weight as it will hold

Brutally In Depth: Terrible Ted Arcidi, Bench Beast
and Utter Maniac

The fact that most of the people endlessly (and fruitlessly) babbling about
training online in the modern era seem to know the names of people like Brad
Castleberry, Jujimufu, and that Athlean-X shitslug but not that of the first man to
bench 700lbs so raw he wasn't even wearing wrist wraps is indicative of just how
useless the vast majority of the fitspo bullshit truly is, and how pointless the
machinations of everyone using the hashtag fitfam truly are.
Absent in Ted Arcidi's herculean effort are even the oft-repeated bodybuilder
critiques about over-arching, because Arcidi wasn't trying to be the most famous
belly tossing contortionist in history, nor was he about gaming weird
biomechanical bullshit to trick lift the weight- Ted Arcidi was instead about
moving the most weight with as much raw aggression and brute strength as he
possibly could from his chest to arm's length while laying on his fucking back.
Period. No tricks, no nonsense, and no poser jitbaggery... and to top it off he was
a truly interesting and compelling figure throughout his life, rather than a poser
chasing dollars with a fabricated resume and the depth of character to match that
of a sheet of saran wrap.
If you want the TLDR of Terrible Ted Arcidi's resume, you can pretty much just
toss all of the weaksauce bullshit you've got on your bucket list into the trash and
imagine a biography that stops just short of conquering a small nation and
walking on the moon. He's owned gyms, a supplement company, a sporting
goods company, acted in movies with Denzel and DeNiro, shared the small
screen with Tracey Morgan, traded mustache grooming secrets with Tom
Selleck, wrestled in the WWE and WCW, traveled the world, rocked a physique
envied by many and matched by very few, and out-benched almost every single
person who's ever walked the Earth.
Vital Statistics
Height : 5'11"
Weight : 291lbs
Raw Bench (Competition): 705lbs

Single-Ply Bench (Competition): 725lbs
Standing Behind the Neck Press (Strict): 375lbs x 5

Squat : 750lbs [800lbs a little high]
Deadlift : 730lbs
The world-shattering bencher and substitute-for-the-hilariously-incarcerated-
Ken-Patera pro wrestler Ted Arcidi was born in Buffalo, NY in 1958 to a first-
generation Italian-American orthodontist and a nurse. Being a kid in Buffalo
during the 70s, he played hockey year-round. At that time, defenseman Bobby
Orr was setting the goddamned world on fire by being one of the highest scorers
in the league and in history while playing defense. In a time when ice hockey
defensemen were basically just broken-faced serial killers on ice, Orr managed
to lead score like the best forwards and be a vicious, helmetless slaughterbeast at
the same time. As such, every kid in North America wanted to be him, and every
chick with a working vagina wanted to fuck him blind.
If you can get past the fact that there was a time in the US when people actually
gave a shit about hockey, know that Arcidi was admittedly no better than
average at the sport. It wasn't for lack of trying however, as he broke his ass off
training for it, doing endless pullups, dips, and pushups, tons of road work, and
playing a ton of street and ice hockey.
As a freshman at Salem State University, Arcidi wasn't exactly setting the world
on fire from a grades or hockey standpoint- he was spending any time he wasn't
spending in the bar trying to bang every broad who passed his field of vision.
Rocking what he claims was a 0.00 GPA going into the second semester of
school, Arcidi was treated to a blizzard that dropped 27 inches on Boston, so he
hit the gym out of nothing more than boredom and was instantly hooked.
According to Arcidi,
"And I think the fact that, you know, partaking in sports is
important, but even when I was doing sports the calisthenics, I
was like insane about it. And I really feel that doing-I used to do
dips like an animal, push-ups, chin-ups. And I really feel that that
just commenced a great basis for weight training because my
tendons were really strong. I, I because I did that for years. I did
that for at least three years before I even touched the weight."
Source: YouTube
“It was kind of like opening up Pandora’s box for me. The developing of
strength, size and power was something I hadn’t experienced
before and I enjoyed it very much.”
From there, it was all downhill, and by downhill I mean easy as falling off a
ladder into a bucket cunt at an orgy. In his sophomore year, Ted benched 420.
One of Ted's friends convinced him to transfer to Norwich State, which he did in
spite of the fact he'd have to sit out a year of hockey- he figured he would spend
the year lifting so as to enter his next year a goddamn beast. There, he essentially
forced the school administration to allow him the same access to the dining hall
as the football team so he could eat enough to fuel his insane workouts, and
proceeded to blow up like the goddamned Hindenburg. At his first meet, less
than two years after he first picked up a weight, Terrible Ted pushed 460 at a
bodyweight of 220 (fully 50lbs heavier than his starting weight). The following
year, he his 545 at 242. The year after, 610 lbs. Then, in 1985, almost seven
years to the day after he first picked up a weight, Ted Arcidi became the first
man to bench over 700lbs in competition, putting up 705lbs at the Budweiser
World Record Breakers in Honolulu.
"We all have a great deal of talent within us, but the key is unleashing it."
All steroids, right? Ted readily admits to gear use, but he didn't touch it until
after he was already benching 600. And if you think it just came easy as shit to
him, think again- after gaining admittance to some of the top dental schools in
the country (Tufts, Marquette, and NYU, and Georgetown), Ted chose Tufts and
worked as a substitute teacher to pay his way through the program. Then,
realizing that he was insanely close to smashing the shit out of the world record,
Arcidi had to make a choice- school or legendary status in the strength world.
"And I’m just saying to myself, “I’m not, I better not blow this,”
you know? Because at one point I was, I was thinking you know I
have a shot to be the first man to bench press 700 pounds. I mean
that’s gonna, that’s gonna be earth shattering. No one’s ever done
it. The world record at the time was 661. You’re breaking it by like
forty something pounds, that’s like Bob Beamon in the long jump.
You just blew it away."
As Janae Kroc put it, "After dropping out of school, Ted moved into a small,
dark, damp basement with a single room and a pull chain toilet so that he could
focus completely on breaking the record." The man was the living embodiment
of being a driven competitor, and he let absolutely nothing stand in his way. As
such, Arcidi officially became the proud owner of the biggest bench press in
human history, surpassing the legendary Bill Kazmaier, within a year.
Having smashed the ever-loving hell out of the bench press record, Terrible Ted
started looking around for other opportunities to showcase his strength (and
actually make a little cash). With Ken Patera in prison for his notorious and
utterly amazing McDonald's incident, the WWE needed a strongman, and Arcidi
fit the bill perfectly. At the end of Patera's prison sentence, Arcidi was released,
and he went on to wrestle alongside The Ultimate Warrior, Ravishing Rick Rude,
and Mick Foley in WCCW (a Texan organization run by the Von Erich wrestling
dynasty) for a couple of years, won the heavyweight title then finally turned his
attention back to powerlifting in 1990 when that organization went tits-up.
Tragically, five years of professional wrestling combined with years of ultra
heavy benching took their toll on Arcidi, and though he was able to easily set
another record using one of Inzer's new bench shirts, he had problems locking
out the weight and ditched his comeback after a year. From there, he opened a
gym in New Hampshire, continued selling his own brand of supplements for
years, and opened a business refurbishing exercise equipment for resale. On top
of that, he introduced Triple H to Killer Kowalski after repeatedly trying to talk
him out of joining the record business and was a strength trainer for both Chyna
and Triple H early on in their careers. And if that weren't enough goddamned
entries in his book of awesome, he acted alongside Denzel in Equalizer 2, Law
and Order, with DeNiro and Rene Russo in The Family, Nurse Jackie, 30 Rock,
and Blue Bloods, among other things.
With that utterly ridiculous biographical intro, you people better be dying to find
out how the man ate and trained, and you're in luck- I researched this hard
enough that I might at this point be world's foremost authority on this badass.
The Various Victuals of Terrible Ted

Like some of the behemoths of the 1950's, Arcidi's rise to cryptozoological
dimensions was quick and focused, but nothing Earth shattering, restrictive, or
ridiculous. Nah, he wasn't on some proto-Vertical Diet, nor did he weigh and
measure each morsel like he was a moneylender from ancient Sumeria faced
with tables of weird exotic spices to exchange for coin. Instead, the dude who
packed on 100lbs of rip in five years stuck to the basics.
Breakfast for Ted always consisted of oatmeal, whole eggs, juice, and
multivitamins, though it was his smallest meal of the day. Thereafter he adhered
pretty rigidly to 1980's bodybuilder fare mostly consisting of chicken and
spaghetti. He believed that a ratio of roughly 40% carbs and 60% protein was
optimal, keeping fats as low as possible, because the 1980's were an insanely fat-
phobic era. This meant he ate a massive amount of chicken breasts, because
Terrible Ted was wolfing down 7,000 calories a day to gain and mass. He stayed
away from sugars with near religious fastidiousness, believing that
hypoglycemia was the ultimate gains killer, but once every two weeks he'd eat a
candy bar just so he remembered what chocolate tasted like. As for protein
sources, Ted believed that chicken and fish were the best options, and stated that
"If you are going to eat red meat do so just twice a week. Red meat, I feel,
makes you sluggish. It takes so long to digest. It interferes with
your workouts. Red meat is not such a good source of protein for
myself anyway. I feel chicken and fish have less corpuscles
between its muscle fibers."
If that made you blink in confusion, you're not the only one- my mental image of
the man immediately changed from a ~300lb man mountain to an elderly man in
a tonsure and black robes who's giving alchemical advice while slowly dying of
mercury poisoning.
Compounding that statement is one most people will likely find even more
unconventional but was common among powerlifters in that era- Arcidi's
bodyweight in the offseason was 15lbs lighter than his competition training
weight. Because Arcidi and his fellow powerlifters weren't the attention
whoring, narcissistic douches of the modern era, they were delightfully
unconcerned with what the people around them, or in the world at large, thought
about their training, form, training weights, and physiques were in the offseason,
because again, they trained because they enjoyed training , not because their
existence was so empty, lonely, and valueless that they required constant
affirmations of their existence from complete strangers.
“I like to let my bodyweight drop during the off-season. To tell you the truth, I
felt pretty good after I went to the Patriots football training camp and got down
to 260-265 lbs. I got some cardio. I like to drop down about 15 lbs. to 270 lbs.
before I begin cycling for a powerlifting competition."
Though I now despise cardio with a vehemence most people reserve for having
their public persona match their banal private existence, I recognize its utility. As
such, I let people know it's possible to be jacked and ripped without it, even
though science actually says you'll be bigger if you do cardio. People have taken
that to mean I am staunchly anti-cardio, but it's more that I despise it and would
rather find alternate means to awesome. In any event, big Teddy didn't share my
hatred of the shit- he loved it. His opinion of cardio belies his beginnings in
hockey:
“It’s good to incorporate some running in the OFF SEASON, but

not during the season. I think you lose too much bodyweight. Now
and then if I do feel that I’m getting out of shape, if I feel I’m
losing my breath during a workout and can’t cope with it on a
light training day, I’ll go extremely FAST. I’m talking about a
marathon. I’ll get my workout done in 45 minutes. I’ll just fly right
through it because all I do on Monday is light benches and heavy
assistance work anyway, so I can fly right through it. So, it gets my
blood going, gets my heart beating up a nice, big training pulse.”
And lo and behold, Terrible Ted has an answer for the natty bros of the world
who claim that in spite of the fact Ted put his education and life on hold to focus
himself entirely on training for a world record, his gains were naught but steroids
at work.
“I feel they’re necessary for gaining strength. Especially at a WORLD

CLASS LEVEL because everyone else is taking them. I’ve tried a few, but if
they work as well as people have said they work, then I thought I’d be
seeing more people benching 700 lbs. I’m the only one in the 700 lb club
right now. I think a lot of it is not the steroids. It’s NUTRITION and REST
and a good LIFTING CYCLE and a POSITIVE ATTITUDE."
Terrible Ted’s Bench-Tastic Training Cycle
Terrible Ted only competed a couple of times a year, and spent 4-5 months a
year in his offseason, at a lighter weight, doing more cardio. Bear in mind when
reading this program that it was the bare bones, mainstay of what he did. It
wasn't as though he didn't deviate from this, as he was no pussy who feared
"overtraining" like Russians fear Keanu Reeves. The dude did plenty of shit that
is not listed here, like neck. For instance he felt "that being tight on the bench is
very important," so he did unlisted "neck work because the insertions of the neck
muscles lie in the shoulder girdle and thus help stabilize it during the bench
press." Given the size of his traps, it's basically unthinkable that he never
shrugged, and given his ridiculous biceps it's preposterous to assume the man
only did 18 reps of bicips a week. Thus, look at this as a framework, not one of
the retarded, stone-set programs so in vogue with 150lb know-nothings on
Reddit.
"We’re trying to set the precedent and not anyone else. That’s why
I respect [Kaz] a lot, especially at his age. I’m not saying he’s an
old man, but he is the senior of a lot of lifters. He has no mental
barriers. That’s got to be the biggest key that we both have. I think
I could Bench Press 750 lbs.
I DON’T HAVE ANY MENTAL BARRIERS."
Off Season Training Framework

Clearly, this is an outline, not the sum total of his training.
Monday:
Light on the bench presses and medium on behind the neck press.
Tuesday:
Usually a rest day, but he occasionally does four sets of ten on lat pulldowns and
then some abs
Wednesday:
Complete rest and relaxation.
Thursday:
Heavy bench press and light on standing BTN press.
Friday:
Like Tuesday, he occasionally moves lats to this day from Thurs.

Saturday:
Heavy standing BTN press.
Explanation of Loading
Light: 80%1RM for 5-6 reps
Medium: 85% for 5

Heavy: 90+% for 2-3 reps
"No coach, no mentor. All me. All me."
11 Week Contest Cycle
1st 3 Weeks : Use repetition pattern consisting of 6’s on bench press.

2nd 3 Weeks : Use repetition pattern consisting of 5’s on bench press.
Final 5 Weeks : Begin to adapt to reps of 3’s and then begin utilizing a
combination of 3’s and 2’s the final two weeks of the cycle.
Week 12 was pre competition week, in which he trained very little. If you want
the specifics on that, read Dennis Weis' e-book). According to one source, who
chronicled Ted's efforts leading up to his 1982 win in Hawaii, Arcidi's
competition cycle sometimes stretched to 13-14 weeks. Unlike modern trainees,
he wasn't wedded to a hard and fast system.
In re his rep schemes:

“Sixes are great, you get good endurance and strength. I feel that
6’s are the greatest thing that man ever came across for repetitions
in the bench. With 6’s, you’re away from the heavy, heavy weight
but yet you still have to throw some weight around, because it’s
not exactly light weight. Imagine going for your best 6 reps. That
means for me I’ve got to get 560-570 lbs. This gives me a lot of
tendon and ligament strength. This is a very important factor
when getting into the heavy triples and doubles later, because the
endurance and increased lung capacity from the 6’s, you’ll be able
to blow up those 5’s, 3’s and 2’s.”
Monday (Day 1)
Bench Press - 3 x 5 x 405 to 415-420lbs (plus forced reps on the last set)
Standing Behind the Neck Press - 1 x 5 x 260, 275, 300

Skullcrusher (to Nose) - 1 x 6 x 340, 350, 350
Standing Barbell Curls - 3 x 6 160 - 195

Lat Machine Pulldowns - 3-4 x 10 x 235-240
FUCK WHAT YA HEARD: Terrible Ted gave exactly zero fucks about
training with paused reps. All of his bench reps in training were touch and
go, with a moderate speed on the descent and as explosively as possible off
his chest. Yes, folks- he loved bounced reps more than most of you love your
own genitalia.
Thursday (Day 2)
Bench Press - 3 x 6 560-570lbs.
Standing Behind the Neck Press - 3 x 6 x 225lbs
The rest of the day is the same as Monday
Saturday (Day 3)
Squats - 1 x 5 x 550
Deadlifts - 1 x 5 540 to 620
Standing Behind the Neck Press - 1 x 3 x 335 and 365 for 1 set each
And rest periods? He took them in spades. “I do take a lot of time resting
between heavy benches. I take up to 5 to 6 minutes between sets. I don’t care, I
want to get the weight, so that is why I take a lot of time in between my sets on
heavy days. I need to be recuperated fully for the next set. Now, on my light days
on the bench and even with assistance work, I go extremely fast because I’m not
going for any heavy weights.”
According to John Buckley, day one of the last phase of Arcidi's training in 1982
looked like this:
Bench Press- 155x8, 225x3, 335x3, 405x2, 475x2, 525x1, 575x3, 575x3,
600x2 plus 4 forced reps.
Skullcrushers (bar brought to nose)- 120x5, 210x3, 305x6, 325x6, 335x6,
335x6, 335x6
Triceps Pushdown- 190x6
Standing BTN Press- 45x6, 135x6, 225x7, 245x7, 245x7, 245x7

EZ Curls- 3 x 6 x 200
Several sources mention Arcidi's love of naps, so he really isn't kidding when he
says recuperation is vital for a big bench. That's not to say he was into taking a
week off every month like every shit coach and natty dipshit online suggests, but
rather that Arcidi religiously napped between 60 and 90 minutes a day, every
day. Beyond that, Arcidi believed that neck work, skullcrushers, and strict
standing behind the neck press were critical components of his bench press
success. Though he is the only source beyond me who seems to have noticed or
mentioned this, the abdominal strength that heavy overhead presses confer carry
over strongly into every other lift, so doing them seated basically destroys their
utility.
And there you have it- Terrible Ted Arcidi, one of the greatest benchers in
history and without question one of the coolest people to ever walk the planet. If
nothing else, this should stand as a reason to get off your ass and do something
interesting with your life, because however much interesting shit you do, your
life's story will bore the shit out of anyone who knows Ted Arcidi's tale.
You don't owe anybody anything. You're

your own man. When the party's over
and you've screwed up, you're the guy
you have to answer to. If you do well,
you still have to answer to yourself . -
Ted Arcidi
Jennifer Thompson- Natty Superwoman
Seeing a good woman bencher is about as rare as seeing a John Wayne

impersonator in a gay pride parade. Unless, of course, you happen to know
Jennifer Thompson, who’s been out-benching most of the guys in her gym for
the last 20 years. Given that she competes in a federation that seems to revere
Josef Stalin as the godfather of fun, you know there was a dude out there with a
micrometer and someone measuring the weight on the bar to the nanogram to
ensure her 319 bench at 138 was legit. After she hit that, she was probably
polygraphed, strip-searched, beaten with reeds, polygraphed again, and then
piss-tested for everything short of protein excreted in her urine. I'm sure even
after all of that they chased her around screaming "liar!" at her and pelting her
with rotten vegetables until her blood tests came back negative. The USAPL’s
collective psychosis aside, Thompson has managed to put together so much
consistent success in her class that they might as well just rename the class after
her and get it over with. as unfun as they are men-out-of-time, since they would
have been far more at home in early 20th Century Europe, when being a fascist
made you cooler than Rob Van Winkle in "Cool As Ice".
In any event, the standard weaksauce criticism usually bandied about to dismiss
a person’s lifts, like “steroids” or “fake plates or whatever, just don’t apply to
Jennifer Thompson. At 45, she’s still moving huge weights, dominating her
class, and consistently- she’s standing on the podium twice as much every year
as most people change their goddamn oil.
Thompson's approach to just about everything seems to be completely unique,
from what I've seen, from the fact that she competes every month or two to the
manner in which she structures her workouts. Instead of alternating speed and
heavy days, she's got alternate speed and heavy weeks. As she puts it, her
“heavy week involves static holds and heavy set work. My speed week uses
bands and I work on my single max lifts. When I have a long period between
competitions I do a 12-week workout that starts with exercises at 10 reps and
works its way down to 5 reps. I use this to build up my base strength."
Interestingly, the weight isn't as important as the speed of the lift for Thompson,
and she will "drop 10 to 15 pounds on that exercise and work on the speed of the
lift" if she's not improving from workout to workout.
Her overall split looks like this:
Day 1: Chest
Day 2: Off
Day 3: Back, Biceps, and Calves
Day 4: Off
Day 5: Shoulders and Triceps
Day 6: Off
Day 7: Legs
Day 8: Off
*Abs are done as a warm-up on workout days.

(8-12 weeks on, then 1 week off. When restarting she simply lowers the weights
and starts over.)
Speed Week
Chest
Bench Singles (1 rep strict bench singles)- 3 singles with 65%, 75%, and 85%
of max
Increase one of your singles every lift if you get all 3
Bench (with bands or chains)- 3 x 5
Set up the bands or chains to add resistance to the top of the lift to increase your
speed through the sticking point.
Incline Bench - 2 xf 5
Decline Bench - 2 x 5
Speed Bench Presses - 2 x 5
Strict (long paused explosive rep) Flyes - 2 x 8
Stabilizer Pushups (Push-ups on a stabilizer ball or board): 2 sets to failure
Shoulders and Tris
Military Press - 3 x 5
Upright Rows - 2 x 8
Lateral Raises - 2 x 8
Dumbbell Shoulder Press - 2 x 8

Offload Bench Press - 3 sets of 5 (Attach bands above the bar so that weight is
taken off the bar at the bottom to help increase your transition into your
triceps)
Close Grip Bench - 2 x 8
Tricep Extensions - 2 x 8
Pushdowns - 2 x 8
Heavy Week
Chest
Bench Press Heavy Hold (Unlocked bench press hold for 15 seconds)- 3 x 5
Incline Bench - 2 x 5
Decline Bench - 2 x 5
Negatives - 2x 2
Dumbbell Stabilizer Presses (Dumbbell presses while lying on a large

stabilizer ball)- 2 x 8
Shoulders and Tris
Military Press Heavy Hold (Unlocked military press hold for 15 seconds)- 2 x
5
Upright Rows - 2 x 8
Rear Lateral Raises - 2 x 8
Dumbbell Shoulder Presses - 2 x 8

Heavy Lockouts (Bench press last 5-7 inches of lift): 3 x5
JM Presses : 2 x 8
Weighted Dips - 2 x 8
Single-arm Pushdowns - 2 x 8
Vince Anello and Larry Pacifico- Bodybuilders and
World Champion Powerlifters Flying (and Winning)
By the Seats of Their Goddamn Pants
The men pictured above, Vince Anello and Larry Pacifico, were powerlifters
who competed against each other throughout their careers, trading records back
and forth as they sought to be not just best powerlifters on the planet, but the
best looking. You would think, with a goal like that, that they would have
meticulously planned their rise to victory like the internet tells you to, plotting
and planning and calculating and formulating, weighing food and checking
macros and doing all of the other extraneous bullshit people discuss to avoid the
cold hard fact that none of that shit is worth a velvet painting of a whale and a
dolphin gettin' it on if you’re not training until your fucking eyes bleed every
time you hit the gym.
These two, however, loved training and trained like they were a couple of epic
masochists trying to pick up a new play partner at a BDSM convention, and just
beat the ever-loving shit out of themselves. Pacifico ended up with 54 world
records as a result and hit 832 on the squat with ACE bandages for wraps, a 593
bench, and a 771 deadlift in powerlifting meets with no flight system. And
Anello, by the end of his career, broke the 800 barrier on the deadlift for the first
time at a sub 200 bodyweight, and pulled 821 in competition with a 750 squat
and a 500 bench. But because the real lifting was done in the gym, not outside
it, both men had even more ridiculous numbers witnessed by multiple people,
including an 880 pull by Anello and an 885 squat by Pacifico.
Like any strong person, Anello and Pacifico knew it was only weak people who
would utter the tired adage “it doesn’t matter unless you do it on a platform,”
because when you’re just lifting for yourself, you don’t give a fuck if anyone
else approves of your lift. Thus, they would go into the gym with the type of
wild-eyed zeal usually seen on the faces of people wearing vests styled by ISIS
and attack the shit out of the goddamn weights.
As neither man was huge on planning, they don’t even have a basic framework
to show you. What they did have, however, were sort of trends in their training.
● Partials and Isometrics : Both men relied heavily on partials and

isometrics to build strength. Anello would do deadlift partials from just
below or at the knee. He’d also do partial squats, which (very
interestingly) he thought were far more helpful for the deadlift than they
were for the squat. Both guys used isometrics to improve their pull, setting
the top pin just under their knee and pulling a light weight against it as
hard as possible for six seconds.
● Negatives : Whereas Pacifico used these on the bench, Anello adopted

the deadlift method of unracking a deadlift at the top of the movement,
doing a very slow negative, then pulling it back up from the floor. This
was the training style used by Bob Peoples, who was the first man under
200lbs to pull 700 in competition, and People was actually int the crowd
when Anello did the same with 800.
● Bodybuilding : Both men competed in bodybuilding and stayed lean

year-round. Because of this, they both had incredibly well-rounded totals,
and they looked like Greek gods on the platform.
● Shrugs : Though everyone these days seems to think shrugs are stupid,
both Anello
● Go seriously heavy : Both guys trained primarily in the 1-3 rep range
and focused on getting the weight up any way they could rather than
having the best form. A form check on Anello’s deadlifts would likely
have caused most of the internet’s gurus to have a goddamn stroke.
Calling his deadlift ugly is like calling someone like the Rock or Kate
Upton “pretty”- it’s not really a word that can accurately describe what’s
going on.
To give you an idea of how these guys trained, here is a sample week from Larry
Pacifico- there is no rhyme, reason, or pattern- he just trained his goddamn ass
off, doing whatever he wanted whenever he liked.
Day 1: Deadlift Isometrics
Deadlift Isometrics - two levels, 455 for 6-second holds
Day 2: Light Back
Chinups - 3 x 10
Cable Rows - 3 x 10
Pulldown s- 3x10
Leg Raises
Situps
Day 3: Heavy Squat and Bench
Squat - 1 x 3 x 535; 1 x 2 x 615; 1 x 2 x 705; 1 x 1 x 740

Bench Press - 4 x 6 x 425;1 x 4 x 475; 1 x 2 x 505; 1 x 1 x 540
Wide Grip Bench (long pause)- 435 x 1; 435x3

Situps
Day 4: OFF
Day 5: Deadlift
Deadlift - 1 x 2 x 615; 2 x 2 x 700; 2 x 2 x 720, 1 x 1 x 720; 2 x 4 x 525
Day 6: More Light Back
Chinups - 4 x 8
Pulldowns - 3 x 10
Bent Over Row - 3 x 10
Situps - 2 x 25
Forearms - 3 x 10
Day 7: Squat and Bench
Squat - 1 x 3 x 525; 1 x 2 x 615; 1 x 2 x 705; 1 x 2 x 740

Bench Press - 4 x 6 x 325; 1 x 4 x 415; 1 x 2 x 505; 1 x 2 x 540
Skullcrushers - 1 x 8; 1 x 6; 1 x 4; 1 x 3; 2 x 1
Situps - 2 x 25
Brutally In Depth: Pat Casey Outworks Everyone in
History
Nowadays, it's not uncommon to see a lot of guys weighing in the 200s benching
600+lbs, so you'd think that a guy like Pat Casey would fall by the wayside in a
discussion on big benchers. That, however, is because most people wouldn't
take into account the fact that triple-ply bench shirts can double your bench, and
equipped guys often can barely handle half their opener in a warmup without
their shirts or suits. Casey, however, was the first guy to ever bench 600, squat
800, and total 2000, and he did like a goddamn beast in a t-shirt and shorts.
How'd he do it? Sheer badassery, some sick genetics, schooling from the first
guy to officially bench 400, and by never missing a scheduled workout . I'm
not sure if you guys are seeing a pattern among these legends of strength sports,
but there's definitely a solid one at this point- consistency is the ultimate key.
In re the second reason Casey was such a beast- the Godzilla-strong cocksucker
benched 420 at a bodyweight of about 215 when he was 17 years old. Hideously
unfair, for sure, in the eyes on anyone who was, like me, pumped about a 285
bench when they were 17. Nor was this a big deal for him- according to Bruce
Wilhelm, "he did not have to check his biorhythm chart, or to be totally rested or
to have his own equipment to do his best lifting on." Oh, and to add insult to
injury, Casey competed only as a bodybuilder at the time, rather than a
powerlifter.
That's not to say that Casey trained like a poofter- he trained in marathon
sessions on a regular basis, doing 7-8 hour sessions of weighted dips. Once, at a
bodyweight of 300, he did a single with 308lbs hanging off him. Additionally,
he'd occasionally bench with no spotter in a shed without electricity, by
candlelight (and nearly killed himself doing so on at least 2 occasions). This
wasn't uncommon for him, as Casey trained by himself, reading magazines to
motivate himself, and then just busting his ass for endless hours doing the most
ridiculous shit of which he could think, like a neck bridge pullover and press
with 405 lbs. According to the man himself,
"At a bodyweight of 300 and using a 250 pound dumbell I did 200
repetitions. I started with sets of 5, then 4, gradually descending
all the way down to singles. I did this over a 7 hour period of time
and I can readily attest to the fact that I was totally thrashed. I felt
shot for the next two weeks. But for some reason at that time I felt
that they helped. On several other occasions I did over a 100,000
pound workload dipping, working over a period of 8 hours."
Insane. Casey credited his massive benching power to his marathon dipping
sessions, in addition to having done thousands of bench press lockouts in his
homemade bench in the aforementioned shed. He mentioned that he got the idea
from Marvin Eder, another bonafide badass who lifted insane poundages prior to
the advent of lifting equipment or the prevalence of gear. Additionally, like
Eder, his workouts were absolutely beastly. Wilhelm lists the following as a
typical week in the gym for Pat Casey:
Monday :
Bench Press Lockouts -Singles from 4 inches off chest. 3 singles from 7
inches off chest.After lockouts, 2 sets of regular benches with 405 x 3.
Dumbbell Incline - 3 sets of 5 reps warmup. 120 x 10, 200 x 3 x 5
Lying Triceps Extension - 5-6 x 3-5

Chins - 2-3 x 8-10
Curls - 3 x 5.
Tuesday
Squats - 135 x 5, 22 x 3, 315 x 2, 405 x 2, 585 x 2, 650 x 5 singles, 515

x 10
Leg Extension - 3 x 20
Leg Curls - 2 x 12
Deadlifts from below knee - (working on sticking point) 315 x 5, 405
x2, 515 x 1, 565 x 6 singles.
Friday
Bench Press - 135 x 20; 225 x 10; 315 x 5, 405 x 5; 515 x 1; 560/570 x 5
singles, 405 x 10, 315 x 20.
Seated Mlitary Press - 135 x 10, 225 x 5, 315 x 3, 400 x 1, 315 x 5, 225
x 8.
Dips - Bodyweight x 3 x 5; 10 x 5 x 205
Saturday:
Lockout Squats - above parallel, squat down and stop on pins. Dead
stop. No bounce at the bottom. 135 x 10, 225 x 5, 315 x 3, 405 x 2, 515 x
1. 585 x 1, 650 x 1, 750 x 5 singles, finish with full squat – 405 x 5 with a
pause at the bottom. These lockouts were mainly for the feel of handling
heavy weight.
Leg Extensions - 3 x 20
Leg Curls - 2 x 12
Monday
Wide Grip Seated Presses - 10 x 5; 1 x 20
Cheating One Arm Lateral Raises - 5 x 5; 1 x 20
Cheating One Arm Front Raises - 5 x 5, 1 x 20
Dips - 8 x 5, 1 x 20
Wednesday
Handstand Presses Against Wall - With hands on boxes. 10 x 5. If you

cannot do a complete press-up from the position do a half press until your
strength increases enough to do full movements. You can add weight by
tying a plate around your waist.
One Arm Lateral Raises- 5 x 8, 1 x 20.
Bent Forward Lateral Raises - 5 x 8; 1 x 20.
Dumbbell Shrugs - 10x 10; 1 x 20.
Friday
Seated Press Behind Neck - 10 sets of 5, 1 x 20.
Dumbbell Shrugs - 5 sets of 10, 1 x 20.

One Arm Dumbbell Presses - 10 sets of 5, 1 x 20.
Strict Standing One Arm Lateral Raises : 6 x 10

Workouts like those detailed above made Casey insanely, frighteningly strong-
we're talking super-chimp on steroids and HGH strong. So fucking strong, in
fact, that Casey once picked up a bench and moved it across the floor, failing to
realize at the time that it had been bolted directly into the fucking concrete.
Thus, the next time you think you've fucking torn it up in the gym, remember-
there's always someone who's taken it a step further, so it's time to take two
fucking steps forward and lay down your fucking marker on history.
Pat Casey’s Shoulder and Arm Specialization
Pat recommended this shoulder and press specialization program for six weeks.
Monday
Wide Grip Seated Front Barbell Press - 10 x 5; 1 x 20
Cheating One Arm Lateral Raises - 5 x 5; 1 x 20
Cheating One Arm Front Raises - 5 x 5; 1 x 20
Dips - 8 x 5; 1 x 20
Wednesday
Handstand Pushups - 10 x 5; 1 x 20
One-arm Incline Lateral Raise - 5 x 8; 1 x 20

Rear Lateral Raises - 5 x 8; 1 x 20
Dumbbell Shrugs - 10 x 10 ; 1 x 20
Friday
Seated Behind the Neck Press - 10 x 5; 1 x 20
Dumbbell Shrugs - 5 x 10
One Arm Overhead Dumbbell Press (brace with the free hand)- 10 x 5;
1 x 20
Lateral Raises - 6 x 10
Weightlifters
Dmitriy Klokov- If Jesus Had Been a Russian

Weightlifter, His Name Would Have Been Klokov,
Because This Motherfucker Walks on Water
The chances someone who’s been doing any kind of real lifting in the last ten
year might not know the name Dmitri Klokov would be like someone not
knowing Guy Fieri’s name after binge watching the Cooking Network for a
week straight, or a cokehead not knowing the name Pablo Escobar. On the off
chance you’ve been off in a shed atop a mountain doing nothing but training for
the last few years, Klokov was Russia’s shining star in weightlifting for a few
years and built an insanely fervent online following with a combination of being
really, really ridiculously good looking and the ability to put sick weights
overhead with relative ease.
Since he retired from weightlifting, Klokov has won a Physique competition,

been accused of engaging in some kind of collusion with Trump (and that is a
weird rabbit hole to research if you get bored) and competed in the Pro Grid
League, which was a short-lived professional sports league that threw
bodyweight exercises, CrossFit, and gymnastics into a blender. In addition to his
431lb snatch and 510lb clean and jerk, Klokov beat Crossfit legend Rich Froning
on Isabel (30 snatches with 135lbs for time) and Heavy Isabel (Isabel with
220lbs), Klokov Presses 335lbs, and has done a five second paused front squat
with 550lbs. Like just about everyone else in this book, the dude looks at least
as good as his lifts say he should.
Monday
Hyperextensions - 3 x 10
Muscle Snatch + Snatch Grip Behind the Neck Press (Klokov Press)
+ Overhead Squat - 3 x 2+2+2
Deficit Snatch Grip Deadlift + Deficit Snatch (with straps)- 3 x 2+1

(add weight each set)
Deficit Snatch Grip Deadlift - 3 x 3
"Trapi" (swinging upright rows with snatch grip)- 5 x 5 (same weight)
Snatch Grip Behind the Neck Press - 3 x 3 (add weight each set)
Tuesday
Snatch (no hook)- Work up to two heavy singles (as heavy as needed)
Snatch Grip Deadlift (no hook)- Work up to two heavy singles (as
heavy as safe. When he misses a weight, he moves on to the next exercise
and adds weight))
Snatch Grip Deadlift (hook)- Work up to two heavy singles (same as
above)
Snatch Grip Deadlift (straps- Work up to two heavy singles (same as
above)
Trapi - 5 x 5
Back Squat (slow descent and long pause) + Front Squat (with same
weight)- 3-5 x 1+1 Barbell Jump Squat - 3-5 sets of 10 reps
Wednesday
Clean + Front Squat + Push Press + Pause Jer k- 3 x 1+1+1+1
Clean Grip Deadlift + Shrug Extension - 3 x 3+3
Standing Military Press - 3 x 3

Friday
Pause Snatch (at knee with straps)- 3-5 x 1

Snatch deadlift + snatch stiff leg deadlift + snatch deadlift + snatch
stiff leg deadlift- 3 x 1+1+1+1 (add weight each set)
Trapi - 5x5
Snatch Grip Behind the Neck Push Press + Overhead Squa t- 3 x 2+2
Sots Press - 5-6 x 3
Saturday
Power Clean + Push Press - 1+2, 3 sets going up in weight
Clean Grip Deadlift - work up to a daily max, do three singles, then a

backoff set of ten reps.
Back Squat - work up to a daily max, do two singles, then a backoff set
of ten reps.
Barbell Jump Squat - 5 x 10
Russ Knipp- He Strict Pressed Your Best Bench…

Weighing Only 165lbs
Unless you’re a history buff of US Olympic weightlifting or an evangelical

Christian who’s super into muscular Christianity, it’s almost a certainty you’ve
never heard of Russ Knipp. This man set a half dozen world records including
an unreal 350lb press weighing 165, which is frankly one of the more insane
strength feats of which I have ever heard- over two times his bodyweight.
What follows is the six day a week program Knipp used just to bring up his
press- he trained the rest of the Olympic lifts were trained on those days as well,
but what’s listed is just what he recommended for people to bring up their press.
One quick note- though Knipp wasn’t known for push jerking his press, he was a
master of the double layback, which is how he managed his 350lb press. As
such, he had to practice both the strict military press and the Olympic Press, to
ensure his strength and technique were where they needed to be in order to move
massive weight- that’s why you see both lifts included.
Mon, Wed, Fri
Bench Press to the Neck (with a standing press grip)-: 135 x 10, 205 x
8, 240 x 5, 255 x 5, 275 x 5, 255 x 5
Reverse Curl - 45 x 8, 65 x 8, 3 x 5 x 75
Situps - 8 x 25
Tues and Thurs
Military Press - 135 x 10, 175 x 8, 205 x 5, 225 x 5, 230 x 5, 235 x 5, 2 x

5 x 220
Situps - 8 x 25
Saturday
Olympic Press - 135 x 5, 175 x 5, 205 x 5, 240 x 5, 275 x 3, 290 x 3
Situps - 8 x 25
Hand Stand Pushups (between two chairs)- 6 x 15

Brutally In Depth: Ike Berger- The Odd Lift Virtuoso
and Beast-Mode, Pocket-Sized Weightlifter
Ike Berger exists as the death touch for any manosphere / redpill /
Bodybuilding.com user / Redditor dumbfuck who opens his cock holster about
"manlets," because Berger was a goofy looking Jew lifter who stood 5'2" and
132lbs and crushed more vagina than all of Reddit has collectively seen in its
life. Berger partied like he was trying out for Mötley Crüe, chased women like a
cartoon skunk, and outlifted everyone on the planet more than once, and on top
of all of that was absolutely crucial to the creation of the foundations of modern
powerlifting training.
Berger's story is even cooler than Bill West's, frankly. Like the tiny baby Jewish
Christ man before him, he was born in Jerusalem and immigrated to the US with
his parents at 13. Being a veritable dwarf with what can only be assumed was a
Yiddish accent so thick he'd even have stood out in a Mel Brooks film, the little
guy started to get his ass kicked on the regular. Being a ballsy little midget, he
just walked his ass directly into the first gym he saw, walked up to the biggest
guy in the gym, and asked him to help him get jacked.
"I think I paid him a dollar a week, because I didn’t have any money then.
So, he said 'have you ever worked out?' and I told him no. He said
to me ‘you look very strong, did you ever lift weight?’ and I didn’t
even know the meaning of 'lifting weights.' So he showed me what
to. He put on like 80 pounds and he pressed it and then I took the
80 pounds and I pressed it. Eventually, he put up 120 [pounds] on
there and he pressed it and then I pressed it and he couldn’t
believe that I pressed body weight and never touched a weight. So
he said, 'Look from now on, I’m going to train you weightlifting. I
think you have tremendous possibilities and there will come a time
if you get really good and that maybe you’ll get to the Olympics
and win a gold medal. Maybe you’ll get to be the strongest man in
the world, pound for pound.'"
Whoever that dude was, he was not fucking wrong, because Berger blew up like
he was a closet racist on Twitch. He had one of the fastest rises in US
weightlifting history, improving so fact that he became a national champion in
the sport only three years after starting his training. A year later, injured and
defending his title against all comers, he still managed to win and got a spot on
the Olympic team.
Let that sink in- Ike Berger broke his ass so hard in training that he managed to
gain a spot on the US’s highly competitive, all-star Olympic weightlifting team
just seven years after he first touched a weight. Nor was he training in some
Chinese weightlifter factory wherein he’s rubbed down nightly be whatever
Chinese geishas are called and fed the best food and supplementation the
Chinese government can offer. This was a scrawny, poor Israeli immigrant who
busted his ass and pulled off a near impossibility all on his own merit.
Even better, he blew the weightlifting world’s skirt up by winning the Olympic
Games as a teenager and breaking the world record in the total at the same time.
He then went on to win both the 1958 and 1962 World Championships, silvered
in the 1960 and 1964 Olympic Games. He went on to set a few more records, the
last of which was at the Olympic Games in Tokyo, in 1964, with a 152.5kg clean
and jerk. That record lasted for more than 5 years, becoming one of the longest
held world records in weightlifting history" (AOBS honorees).
Vital Stats
Height : 5’1.5”
Weight : 132lbs
Bench Press : 320lbs
Squat : 500lbs
Front Squat : 407lbs
Clean and Jerk : 336lbs
Press : 267lbs (without a layback)
Snatch : 236lbs
Total : 843lbs
Whenever he wasn't required to be in York to prep for the Olympics, Ike and his
training partner and fellow Olympian Dave Sheppard lived in the Muscle House
and trained with Bill West. Like a lot of the US team, Sheppard and Berger
found Bob Hoffman's heavy-handed Christian morality obnoxious, and Hoffman
was forever bitching about the guys’ endless “skirt chasing” (which in York
means they'd fuck literally anything, because that town is nothing but a crack
den with a lifting museum in it), so they avoided training there like the plague.
Those two, however, were both accused of statutory rape and impairing the
morals of minors in 1959, which led to the shutting down of Muscle Beach and a
lot of shit-talking from Hoffman. Berger beat both charges, but a point was
made- a Jewish midget and his manlet training partner (Shepperd was 5'6",
185lbs) were able to do so much fucking in a beach town in the 50's that the city
shut down an entire community to stop them.
Or so they thought- the shutdown of Muscle Beach was exactly the impetus Bill
West needed to start his own club- the Culver City Westside Barbell Club.
Berger trained there with West on and off over the years that followed and was
considered to be part of West's inner circle, which only consisted of himself,
Berger, and Joe DiMarco.
Ike's training methods came from a variety of sources, but seem to have been
heavily influenced by Paul Anderson, with whom Ike trained frequently at York
Barbell when preparing for the Olympics. Anderson, as I think we all know, was
an odd lifting virtuoso discovered by deadlift monster Bob Peoples, and Bob
Hoffman convinced Anderson to try his hand at the Olympic lifts to give the US
a chance at defeating the great Russian heavyweights of the time.
At York, Berger also trained with legendary strength coach Bill Starr and one of
the greatest Olympic lifters of all time, Tommy Kono, as well as every
bodybuilding luminary you could name from the 1950s in California. The man
was surrounded by greatness and was at the time considered to be the pound-for-
pound strongest lifter on the planet, so his influence on the training methods of
the Westside guys cannot be overstated.
Contest Prep Routine

In the offseason, Berger seemed to focus heavily on the odd lifts, a habit he
likely picked up from training with Paul Anderson at York. His focus was to
maintain and develop his strength and build ligament and tendon strength so that
he was ready to pound the fuck out of the Olympic lifts when contest prep time
rolled around. Given that he trained with the Westside guys, it stands to reason
he was training between two and five times a week for lengthy periods of time,
then getting hammered afterwards.
Berger felt that without his off-season regimen, "I would have run the risk of
becoming physically and mentally drained. This could have left me open to
injuries that would have set my training back for months or even years" (Alpert).
Anyone who is interested in competing in Oly might want to take note of
Berger's comments there, because the incessant fiddlefucking around with light
weights and form work with which American Olympic lifters are positively
obsessed doesn't seem to be yielding much in the way of medals.
Ike’s serious contest prep involved a twelve-week period of training with the
lifting event scheduled at the end of the twelfth week. He divided the twelve
weeks into two-week sequences. While the basic approach to training was the
same as during the non-contest periods, the intensity of the training was
increased. A typical two-week schedule would be:
Olympic Lifts and assistance exercises (squat, bench press, and various pulls)-
First three sets were rep work/warmups, then 3-6 x 1 with 90%
Wednesday (Medium)
Olympic Lifts - First three sets were rep work/warmups, then 3-6 x 1 with 80-
85%
Train up to 95% Olympic lifts and assistance exercises.
Olympic Lifts and assistance exercises (squat, bench press, and various pulls)-
First three sets were rep work/warmups, then 3-6 x 1 with 90%
Wednesday (Medium)
Olympic Lifts - First three sets were rep work/warmups, then 3-6 x 1 with 80-
85%
Max out on all Olympic lifts and assistance exercises. These workouts were
balls to the wall effort to push the max on every lift higher, which would then
raise the training weights accordingly. This workout in week ten only included
the Olympic lifts, because accessory work was then dropped, and the Olympic
lifts were trained exclusively for the following two weeks.
These max out days were insanely competitive, and every guy on the team made
an effort to outdo the others. On top of that, Coach Starr introduced a habit to
the team he’d had in his previous gym- betting a pint of milk over whether or not
the lifters would make their lifts. This, in turn, ramped up the competitiveness
of the lifts even further. Berger went so nuts with the betting that he earned the
nickname "Betcha Berger," a nickname and a habit that Berger later brought to
Westside… though those guys were likely betting beers or shots rather than
anything so wholesome as milk.
Brutally In Depth: Coach Fang, Tian Tao, and
Squatting Like a Fucking Monster with the Chinese
Weightlifting Method

According to the President of the Russian Weightlifting Federation, Maxim
Agapitov, China has by far and away the best weightlifting system in the history
of the sport- better even than the system used by the Soviets in the past. One can
only assume that President Vladimir Putin rode into Agapitov’s office, bare-
chested and on horseback and pistol whipped the man to death for his insolence,
so making that kind of a statement is fairly profound. Russian pride and
wistfulness from the proud days of grimmdark Soviet strength sports dominance
aside, China actually has one of the oldest traditions of weightlifting in recorded
history, with roots in ancient strength competitions dating back 2700 years that
involved lifting tripods, city gate bolts, and (less interestingly) stone barbells.
The modern Chinese weightlifting program, however, is incredibly new- the
Chinese team didn’t even have a training facility until they commandeered a
disused military facility in 1995 and made it their home. There, with no
entertainment beyond a single color television and some drafty, leaky buildings,
the rise to Chinese weightlifting hegemony began. Since 1996, the Chinese men
have medaled in almost every weightclass between bantamweight and middle
weight in the Olympics (they’re not terrifically large people and have thus not
medaled above middleweight in that period), and the Chinese women are almost
exclusively the ones taking the gold in every weightclass but heavy weight
(though they’ve swept the superheavy golds).
The Chinese claim their secret is in combining the best parts of the Soviet
system, which dominated for 30 years, and the Bulgarian system, which
dominated for the twenty after the Soviets. After discovering that the Bulgarian
system only seems to work in concert with PED use and a blatant disregard for
the health and welfare of its lifters, the Chinese decided to forge their own path-
and it’s working beautifully.
According to Coach Fang, the Chinese focus their youngest lifters on technique,
then work on the development of absolute strength- the type of brute strength
one commonly finds in strongmen and less technical powerlifters. Once that’s
been developed, the Chinese focus more on speed strength, which is the ability
to accelerate the bar to a high speed in a short time.
For people who don’t have the good fortune to be born in the People’s Republic
of China, Coach Fang says 80-85% of 1RM for 8-10 sets of 3-5 reps a couple of
times a week is a good idea, and for anyone who squats under 200kg, squatting
should be a priority. If you’re not hitting those numbers, it’s cool to simply train
nothing but squats during a workout periodically, and no matter what your
discipline, to train squats first in a workout. He said it’s fine to squat 3 times per
week, but 2 times is enough (that’s including front and back).
Maxing on the squat once a week is plenty, by the way. If you’re one of those
work up to a training max every goddamned session kind of lifters, it might be
time to rethink that position. According to Coach Fang, you should test your
1RM on the squat once a week, because it takes too much energy to keep going
to 1RM’s and it cuts your capacity for more work. That’s energy that could be
used to develop more strength and power, rather than simply testing what you
have already.
In re the number of reps to be done per set, vary your rep ranges, but never stray
too far off the 1RM- leave the CrossFit workouts to CrossFitters, unless you’re
just working your aerobic capacity. That said, bodybuilding exercises are crucial
in weightlifting, and lifters who avoid them will find their snatch and clean and
jerk suffer as a result. Additionally, lifters shouldn’t neglect their cardio- the
Chinese team uses a short jog to cool down after every session.
Tian Tao, the Squatting Machine
Perhaps the coolest feature of the Chinese weightlifting system is its ability to
produce world class squatters as a byproduct of their training methodology.
Their awesome squatters are legion, but Tian Tao stands head and shoulders
above just about everyone on the planet when it comes to squatting (and the
clean and jerk- he just set a new record with 507 in the 211lb weight class).
For those of you who’ve never heard his name, Tian Tao is a Chinese
weightlifting virtuoso who started lifting at the tender age of ten years old. He’s
silvered in the Olympics and World Championships and won gold at the Asian
Games twice, but what is most interesting about Tao is his superhuman squatting
ability. At 181lbs, Tian easily walked out 682 and squatted it in training (in knee
sleeves), and has front squatted 617 at 187. We’re not talking about a guy who
was peaking for a meet and hit those numbers- we’re talking about a guy who
just happened to bang out those lifts in the middle of an average training session.
The way Tian and his teammates acquire these insane squatting abilities is
through the use of four squat sessions a week comprised of a variety of squats
that include front squats, back squats, heavy partials, pin squats, and paused
reps, in addition to a shitload of heavy pulling. Thus, if your squat is a disaster,
you might want to drop that stupid, dated, and dull as dishwater Shieko bullshit
for a bit of the General Tso’s method. The Basics of the Chinese System
Before you begin:

● The national team training programs are pretty loosely structured -
they allow for a lot of auto-regulation in terms of reps and weights, which
are chosen at the athlete’s own discretion. In short- you’re not a goddamn
robot, so go ham when you’re feeling your oats and back off when you
need to. This shit isn’t that hard.
● A max attempt for back squats should only be performed on days

when heavy weights feel lighter than normal and you have at least one
person to spot you. The Chinese team is adamant about preventing the
injuries that plagued the Russians and Bulgarians and try to avoid forcing a
square peg into a round hole whenever possible.
● Heavy pulls and heavy squats should never be done in the same
workout , because you’ll be trashed from the first lift and won’t perform
well or with good form on the second.
● Heavy pulls are even more mentally taxing than they are physically
taxing, and are thus awesome. Doubles and triples build physical strength,
but heavy singles build the type of mental strength that you’ll need to carry
you in competition. Don’t neglect heavy singles on clean pulls .
● One or two bodyparts should be chosen to train at the end of every

training session . Go to failure on six sets per exercise, bodybuilding
style, to build strength and improve conditioning of small muscle groups
that can be neglected by focusing on big lifts. Coach Fang insists this is
absolutely necessary for progress in the snatch and clean and jerk.
o The Chinese team are big proponents of overhead extensions

holding
Monday
Snatch - Work up to a 1RM, then 3 × 3 80%1RM
Clean and Jerk - Train up to a 1RM, then 3 × 2 (for the doubles, you
clean it once, then do two jerks. Coach Fang is adamant about not
dropping the first jerk and re-cleaning it)
Back Squats - 8-10 x 3-5 80-85%1RM
Clean Pulls - 5 x 3
Behind the Neck Push Press - 5 x 2-5
Tuesday
Snatch - Work up to a 1RM, then 5-8 x 2-3 80%1RM (Overhead squat

after completion of each rep)
Snatch Balance- 5-8 x 1-3
Snatch Pulls - 5-6 x 2-3

Block High Snatch Pulls with Rebend - 6-8 x 2-3
Wednesday
Clean + Front Squat + Jerk - Work up 1RM, then 5-8 x 2 80%1RM

Front Squats - 5-8 x 1-3
Clean Pulls - 5-6 x 3

Behind Neck Push Jerk - 8 x 1
Push Press -5 x 3
Thursday
Back Squats - Work up to a 1RM, then 6-8 x 2-5
Snatch - Work up to 85-90%, then 2-3 x 1
Clean and Jerk - Work up to 85-90%, then 2-3 x 1
Strict Press - 5 x 3-5
Friday
Snatch - Work up to a 1RM, then 3 x 1

Clean and Jerk - Work up to a 1RM, then 3 x 1
Snatch Pulls - 5 x 3
Block Snatch High Pull with Rebend - 5 x 2-3
Jerk Drives - 8×3 (Use about the same weight as your max 1RM back
squats)
Saturday
Front Squats - Work up to a 1RM, then 5-6 x 1-3
Platform Clean Deadlifts - 5-6 x 1-3
Snatch Balance - 5-6 x 1-3
Push Jerk - 5 × 1-3
Some of the Assistance Work
Back Squat - Warmup sets have a 2-5 second pause at the bottom of the
rep
Snatch Grip Bench Rows - sets of 4-8 reps with a hold at the contraction
Weighted Deficit Pushups - sets of 8
Unilateral Overhead Dumbbell Triceps Extensions - very light, for

high reps, to condition the elbows
Isometric Hip Extension Holds - 55lbs for time
Bob Bednarski- 100% American Built Muscle
Bob Bednarski was a burgers and beers style, ultra-crotchety broski who lifted
for the Americans in the last of the US Olympic Weightlifting heyday. Though
he never medaled in the Olympics, Bednarski did set 12 world records and won
five national championships as a heavyweight, and was a superstar lifter in the
1960s.
A contrarian in just about everything he did, Bednarski restricted his training to
almost nothing but the Olympic lifts, because while his interests definitely
included winning, they didn’t seem to include casual weightlifting or gazing at
himself longingly in the mirror. In essence, he was the polar opposite of just
about everyone you know.
The Russians had, at the time, analyzed lifters and found that the lifters with the
strongest press, i.e. the strongest, were often terrible at the jerk and the snatch.
As such, they encouraged their lifters to focus heavily on squatting and the quick
lifts, a system that Bednarski aped. The following is a program Bednarski
developed after moving up a weight class and adding 150lbs to his total in just
four months.
Monday Morning:
Squats - 65%1RM x 5; 70% x 5; 77.5% x 5; 85% x 5; 90% x 2; 95% x 1
Monday Evening
Press - 55% x 5; 65% x 3; 70% x 3; 75% x 2; 80% x 1; 85% x 1
Clean and Jerk - 75% x 2; 85% x 1; 2 x 90% x 1; 92.5% x 1; 90% x 1
Wednesday Morning
Squats - 65%1RM x 5; 70% x 5; 77.5% x 5; 85% x 5; 90% x 2

Wednesday Evening
Snatch - 65%1RM x 5; 72.5% x 3; 80% 2; 85% x 1; 90% x 1; 92.5% x 1
Clean and Jerk - 75% x 2; 85% x 1; 90% x 1; 2 x 92.5% x 1
Saturday
Squats - 65%1RM x 5; 70% x 5; 72.5% x 5; 77.5% x 3; 85% x 2; 90% x 1; 95%

x 1
Snatch - 65%1RM x 5; 72.5% x 3; 80% 2; 85% x 1; 3 x 90% x 1
Sunday
Max out on the snatch, clean and jerk, and clean and press, and act like a
crotchety old man throughout the entire experience (if you really want to capture
the essence of Norb).
Wrestlers / Fighters / Arm Wrestlers /

Random Weirdos
Too many lifters seem to completely ignore a wide array of people walking
around looking like members of an advance squad of crack orkish troops planted
here to prepare the world for an other-dimensional invasion of vastly physically
superior humanoids. There are guys like Richard Lupkes, a 63 year old farmer
who briefly wrestled in the WCW and periodically lumbers into arm-wrestling
tournaments to trash all comers- in spite of the fact that the man has never seen
an arm wrestling table outside of a tournament. The man’s overwhelming
strength (he benched over 600 raw in his prime and still boasts 18” forearms on
a ripped 6’2” 315lb frame) allowed him to dominate his opposition even though
he never trained for the sport once. You’ve also got guys like Mike Gould, a 53
year old with 21” arms and 18” forearms, and the Russian mutant Denis
Cyplenkov- arm wrestlers can show you a thing or two about being jacked.
The same goes for professional wrestlers- too many people overlook the fact that
prior to the internet, it was damn near impossible to make a living out of lifting
weights. The only way for genuinely unstable, massively over muscled, hyper-
aggressive dudes to make a living and stay out of jail back in the day was
professional wrestling. In those days, it was commonplace to hear stories like
“Andre the Giant drank 106 beers the other night,” or “[Olympic weightlifting
phenom] Ken Patera and Masa Saito beat the shit out of 16 cops at once and then
missed the verdict of their court case because they were out at a bar getting
drunk and asleep in the courtroom, respectively. Thus, you’ll find that most of
the insanely strong guys of yesteryear gravitated toward professional wrestling.
The list of random jacked people goes on and on- they’re around, if you just look
for them. The key thing to remember, and something that elite lifters like myself
can easily confirm, is that it is often the strongest people who don’t compete.
I’ve seen far more 500lb benchers outside of competitions than in them, and they
required no fanfare or special setup for their lifts- they just plopped down on the
bench and moved the weight because it was their bench day. Keep that in mind
when you’re online talking shit on people who don’t bother competing- there’s
no real upside to competing beyond satisfying the weird muscle worship of a
bunch of sweaty dudes online who don’t lift themselves.
Brutally In Depth: Bruno Sammartino- From War
Refugee to World Champion
Back in the day, if a guy was a wrestler, he was a bona-fide badass. The sport,
which grew out of what were essentially MMA fights with less striking and more
wrestling (catch style), was filled with badasses who ate big, lifted big, and lived
big. They were living proof that the Paul Bunyans and Spring Heeled Jacks and
other men with skills so mad that they are often considered the fanciful bullshit
of legends or conspiracy could have actually existed. I realize that the same
cannot be said for the modern era of wrestlers, since other than the Rock being
ridiculously jacked and charismatic, none of them seem larger-than-life to the
point of being supernatural.
It was from this era that the longest reigning WWE Champion in history, holding
the WWE Title for 2,803 consecutive days, known as the Italian Superman
came. Bruno Sammartino, who presided over what he perceived as wrestling's
fall into "the chemical years" (of which Hulk Hogan's apparently the evil
figurehead), was so beloved by Italians and wrestling fans that they went quite
literally berserk when a heel who turned on him, stabbing him, smashing his
cars, flipping over his cabs on the way to matches, and at one point a mobster
friend of Frank Sinatra's even offered to shoot "Classy" Freddie Blassie on
Sammartino's behalf.
Bruno was an Italian immigrant who had spent two years in the arctic environs
of mountains of Italy (from age 7 to 9) running around like Brendan Fraser in
Encino Man with a sharp stick and dining on dandelions and wild animals.
Yeah, so when you're telling your goddamn sob story on Instagram about how a
rough childhood and broken home are the reason you have a sub 350lb bench,
take a big step back and literally fuck your own face, because big Bruno was so
malnourished in his formative years that he only weighed 80 lbs at age 15. That
year, Sammartino arrived in the US, the docs prescribed him a diet of meat and
potatoes with a side of heavy lifting (holy shit, I was born in the wrong
goddamned era) and shit proceeded to get real.
Sammartino basically treated being the best at everything the same way most
people act when they're finishing a delicious sandwich- it was just what he did,
and he neither sweated little shit nor bemoaned any "hard times" that befell him.
One of his favorite memories is travelling to an annual Strength and Health
picnic and competition in York, PA in 1957. In the era before people abandoned
their pride and set up GoFundMes to pay for their travel costs, Sammartino slept
on a goddamn park bench and then proceeded to wipe the platform with his
competition. He then repeated that process over and over, and by the time he
was 22 be had won Mr. Allegheny in bodybuilding, set a world record for the
bench press, and boasted a 565lb bench, 625lb squat, and 675lb deadlift.
Bear in mind when viewing those numbers that powerlifting didn't officially
exist at this time, and the power lifts were just three of 72 lifts contested in odd
lift meets at the time- it's not as though these guys specialized in them unless
they just loved the ever-loving shit out of them. He didn’t just stop there, either.
His all-time best lifts are borderline absurd.
All-Time Best Lifts
Bench Press - 315lbs for 38 reps; 330lbs for 33 reps right after hitting a
max of 500 for the day; and 565 in competition, with a flat back and two
second pause
Floor Press - 545lbs

Strict Curl - 235lbs
Olympic Press - 410lbs

Deadlift - 705lbs (though he never trained it because he thought it was
bad for the back)
Squat (Competition)- 685lbs
Snatch - 270lbs (both his snatch and clean and jerk were hamstrung by
the fact his elbows wouldn't lock out fully, which he attributed to
malnourishment while living in the Alps)
Clean and Jerk - 370lbs
Not too goddamned shabby, especially considering the fact that he was
fanatically drug free and trained in a time before supplements, and he put up his
565 bench on a rickety homemade bench with no uprights. His workouts were
absolutely legendary, and weren't spurred by anything but Sammartino's
imagination, his defiance against gravity, and his titanic brass balls.
Sammartino did this workout three days a week, did calisthenics another two
days a week, and ran eight miles a day.
Bench Press - 10 sets, working up in 2-rep jumps to his max (I'm

guessing 2 sets of 10, 2 sets of 8, 2 x 6, 2 x 4, 1 x 2, 1 x 1). His 11th set
was a death set with about 65% of his 1RM for the day.
Floor Press - 5-7 x 3 with ~550lbs (see pic above, because it's different
than what I've done as a floor press)
Incline Dumbbell Presses - 5 x 5 (heavy as hell- when he was training
with the legendary Karl Norberg, he was using 150-pound dumbbells)
Incline Laterals - 5 x 5 (again heavy enough to make your eyes bleed,
125-pound dumbbells)
Cheat Upright Rows - 6 x 6-7 x 205lbs

High Pulls (to the navel)- 6 x 3-4 x 400-425lbs
Squats - 8 x 3-5 reps x 650lbs

Strict/Military Barbell Curl - 10 x 10 x 135 to 175 pounds (he'd also
occasionally do cheat curls with 225)
Elias: Badass Active Recovery on a Rest Day
As you can see, Elias, a brawler in the WWE, has followed the Hollywood plan
for development- all of his weight is in his chest, shoulders, and traps. Not a bad
plan for anyone who wants to look good with their shirt off, and for someone
who wants to look imposing when they do so.
Frankly, there are plenty of guys in this book with better traps and shoulders, but
very few of them suffer through what amounts to multiple car crashes a night for
300 days a year. For WWE Superstars, recovery is at least as important as the
training itself. Given the fact that most guys have to abbreviate their training to
accommodate the demands of their job, even their rest days have to be somewhat
active. This is where Elias’ active recovery workout comes in.
The workout Elias recommends shares a lot of similarities with the Bear, but is a
bit less technical. As such, it’s absolutely perfect for sweating out a hangover
without puking up your breakfast. This workout is done in giant set, moving
directly from one exercise to the next until they’re all complete, and is done for
five rounds. The idea here is not to go heavy, so 135 is plenty, and if 135 seems
hard, go lighter- the idea is to get the blood flowing, not to get in a brutal lift.
5 Deadlifts
5 Bent Over Rows
5 Hang Cleans
5 Overhead Presses
5 Squats
George Irving Nathanson: Rest Pause Insanity for
One Lift Specialization
Here’s a name you’ve almost certainly never heard- George Irving Nathanson.
Nathanson was a lifting partner of JC Hise, a legendary strength author and
coach from the early 20th Century, and had a system of training so unique I feel
like I need a wild-ass blowout to discuss it while claiming it’s the product of
ancient alien intervention in human strength development.
Nathanson used this system to pull off sick a 300 x 8 push press as a 175lb 18-
year-old in the 1940s, but was adamant beginners should use it about as often as
blind toddlers should run holding a freshly sharpened chef’s knife. According to
Nathanson, this program requires a massive amount of sleep to work (18 hours
the night before and 12-13 the two nights after) and involves three sessions
every two weeks, then a week layoff, then repeat.
Do one exercise only . Each workout consists of that exercise for 100 singles
with one minute of rest between attempts. He claimed with this system his
military press went up ten pounds every workout until he hit a sticking point.
Though he doesn’t give a loading protocol, I would likely try 90%1RM for this-
that should give you enough weight to make the lift challenging without making
it overly impossible.
Isaac Nesser: Probable Bullshit Artist, But Interesting
Nonetheless
The history of strength sports is filled with some odd characters, some of whom
are full of shit and some of whom are the real McCoy. In the former group,
you’ve got guys like Chuck Ahrens, whose lifts seem to be tall tales until you
consider how many people could corroborate the tales, and how many of those
people were incredible lifters as well. Then you’ve got guys like Isaac Nesser,
whose claims seem like they could be total fabrications and are incredibly
difficult to corroborate.
Because the age of Synthol is upon us and the records Isaac "Dr. Size" Nesser
claims, the world’s largest muscular chest and arms, are now held by goofs who
don’t even appear to lift, it’s difficult to even confirm his claims about those
records. Furthermore, discussion of the guy is almost exclusively limited to
Angelfire websites that haven’t been updated since the internet’s infancy, so any
sensible person’s bullshit alarms should be screaming.
Nevertheless, this random weirdo is compelling just from his pics, and he claims
to rock a 74 inch chest, 29 inch arms, to weigh 362lbs, bench press 825lbs, curl
315 for 5, do one arm tricep extensions with 180, and to be drug free.
To develop that legendary strength, Nesser trains eight to ten days in a row, then
takes two to three days off, alternating heavy workouts with crazy long rest
periods with light ones.
If you’re wondering why you’ve never seen Isaac Nesser on a platform or in a

strongman competition, it’s because he refuses to compete against anyone or
associate with anyone who uses PEDs. That sounds like a gigantic, Santa Claus-
sized bag of bullshit, but the fact remains his measurements are among the
largest ever recorded on a human being, so there’s got to be something there.
Monday: Heavy Day (Legs)
Squats - 3 x 3-5 (80%1RM)

Romanian Deadlifts - 2 x 3-5 (80%1RM)
Leg Press - 3 x 8 (80%1RM)
Tuesday: Light Day (Arms and Shoulders)
Dumbbell Press - 3 x 5-8 (80%1RM)

Shrugs - 3 x 3-5 (80%1RM)
Skullcrushers - 3 x 3-5 (80%1RM)

Barbell Curls - 3 x 3-5 (80%1RM)
Wednesday: Heavy Day (Back)
Deadlifts - 3 x 3-5 (80%1RM)
Dumbbell Rows - 3 x 3-5 (80%1RM)
Weighted Pull Ups - 3 x 3-5 (80%1RM)

Thursday: Light Day (Shoulders and Arms)
Military Press - 3 x 3-5 (80%1RM)
Farmers Walk - 3 x 100 yards (100%1RM)

Barbell Curls - 3 x 3-5 (80%1RM)
Skullcrushers - 3 x 3-5 (80%1RM)
Friday: Heavy Day (Chest)
Bench - 3 x 3-5 (80%1RM)
Flat Dumbbell Bench Press - 3 x 3-5 (80%1RM)
Close Grip Bench Press - 3 x 8 (80%1RM)
Saturday: Light Day (Speed Training)
Sprints - 3 X 20 meters
Dumbbell Lunges - 3 x 8 (80%1RM)

Split Squats - 3 x 8 (80%1RM)
Sunday: Heavy Day (Legs)
Squat - 3 x 3-5 (80%1RM)
Romanian Deadlifts - 2 x 3-5 (80%1RM)
Split Squat - 3 x 8 (80%1RM)

Braun Strowman: Simulating Strongman Events to
Trash Guys Who Have Real Implements
Though he is now well known for his dominant run in the WWE as that
promotion’s modern day Andre the Giant, 6’8” and 340lb Braun Strowman
actually began his athletic career as a strongman, pulling down the Arnold
Classic Amateur World Champion title in 2012. It goes without saying that the
dude is strong, and boasts a 550lb bench, 885 deadlift, and a 400+ overhead
press. Thus, when Braun speaks about getting strong, people should listen.
One facet of Strowman’s training that’s incredibly useful for the average person
is that when he won the Amateurs, he trained in a tiny, backwoods gym in rural
North Carolina that contained absolutely no strongman equipment - he had to
make that shit up as he went. Like Richard Lupke, Strowman’s training had to
make him brutally strong enough that missing the finer points on implement
technique wouldn’t keep him from mangling everyone in meets.
Here are the slices of deep fried gold with which he came up in order to destroy
his opposition on contest day:
Use A Squat Rack To Simulate A Car Deadlift
Set up a squat rack with two bars over one of the safety bars, so they’re about
16” off the ground (and if possible angle the other end under the other crossbar
on a low enough height to keep the bar’s end on the floor. Then you load the
high end, face away from the rack, stand in between them, and deadlift them.
This is an event for reps, so there’s no need for a max single attempt- work reps
with heavy weights.
Seated Military Press on a Flat Bench For The Log Clean and
Press
Grab a flat bench, drag it into the rack, and plop your ass down on it- forget the
little bench designed for the shoulder press- it does more harm than good in
preparing you to press a log overhead. For that shit, you need a spine comprised
of steel cables and the upper back stability of a massive bridge abutment.
Since the log press can be contested as a max effort lift or a max reps with a
given weight in 75 seconds, you can train this with a combination of high and
low reps to ensure you’re ready to move serious weight when the time comes.
Squat Rack Isometrics as a Substitute for the Yoke
Yokes are a hard implement to find, but you can find a squat rack in any gym.
Set the pins about four inches below lockout on the squat, load up the bar with a
ton of weight (it should be easy enough to find out hat typical yoke weights for
your class are online), and do a partial with a hold for time. Then repeat. Doing
this might not prepare you for the taking of steps with a weight on your back, but
it will build the ab and back strength you’ll need for it. After you’ve fortified
your physique with the strength it needs, taking a yoke weight designed for
novices for a bit of a ride should be no problem.
Use a bucket of sand for the Farmer's Walk .
Braun decided to take it back to the old school for working on his grip strength-
all the way back to Shaolin monk training. Though he has some more standard
suggestions like buying Farmer’s Walk handles on amazon or using dumbbells
or barbells for training this even, he has another that you likely won’t have hear-
a bucket of sand.
Just like the Shaolin monks who used to practice knife hand strikes into sand to
toughen their hands and improve their wrist strength, Strowman suggests
thrusting your hand into a five gallon bucket filled with sand and practicing
making a fist and then opening your hand over and over. Doing so with build
crazy grip strength without much expense, and it will give you crazy bragging
rights online when you tell everyone how hardcore your grip training is.
If that’s not to your taste, you can always practice your pinch grip strength by
pinch gripping two ten pound plates together for time. It’s a far less cool method,
but it should be effective as hell (it was also a favorite grip training method of
the legendary John Grimek.
Rob Vigant Jr’s Forearms of Doom
At 6’2” 205lbs, you’re probably not expecting Rob Vigant Jr’s arms to look like
they do. Vigant’s got arms as big as a lot of dude’s thighs, and even stronger
than they look. Because most of the strength required in arm wrestling is
forearm/wrist strength, Vigant trains the shit out of a part of his body most of us
ignore… though we likely shouldn’t- if we can learn one thing from the history
of strength sports, it’s that insane grip strength leads to insane overall strength.
Vigant trains arms and forearms every three to four days on top of his regular
practice and weight training, using a pretty unique method- thumbless training.
Thumbless Reverse Curls - 3-4 x 6-12

Thumbless Dumbbell Rows - 3-4 x 6-12
(If you can’t get to the gym) Wringing Out A Wet Towel AMRAP #
Brutally In Depth: The Ultimate Warrior,
“If what that man did in his life, makes the blood pulse through the body
of others, and makes them believe deeper in something larger than
life, then his essence, his spirit, will be immortalized by the
storytellers, by the loyalty, by the memory, of those who honor him
and make whatever the man did live forever.”
Although I've never been much of a fan of pro wrestling, I'm definitely a fan of
pro wrestlers and the history of pro wrestling. I am a fan of true, unbridled
insanity painted with a thin veneer of sport and rammed into a hyper-muscular
physique designed to commit violent acts and impose one's will on others.
Clearly, I'm not referring to the modern era of family-friendly wrestling, wherein
they hide behind drug tests and steroids allegations to cover the fact that guys
like Chris Benoit had brains that looked like Swiss cheese when they killed their
families- I'm talking about the pre-drug testing era.
When one considers that there's less money in lifting than there is sucking cock
behind dumpsters in any American ghetto, however, it makes sense that anyone
who loves to lift would gravitate towards wrestling. Furthermore, lifters are by
and large boring sonsabitches. They go to the gym, train people, and go the hell
home, never once stopping to rip an entire eight ball of a line off the dashboard
of a moving car and then leap out at the nearest passerby screaming
unintelligible words, then throw them through a plate glass window as their best
imitation of a practical joke... like Ken Patera did.
THE FAMILY THAT I LIVE FOR ONLY

BREATHES THE AIR THAT
SMELLS OF COMBAT!
This is why it is necessary to profile a wrestler like James Hellwig, The Ultimate
Warrior. A man with the sanity of a serial killer stuffed into the body of a Greek
god and imbued with the fashion sense of an LSD user who grew up in
Chernobyl. The Ultimate Warrior was sane in the same way Oprah is thin and
the Kardashians are actually people- his promos were so unintelligible to the
point where you wondered if he was simply such a genius that you lacked the
requisite intellect to comprehend him, or if it was just a muscular, oily man in
face paint on so much cocaine he was incapable of human speech. He was one
of the most physically violent and remarkably unskilled pro wrestler of the
modern era, relying on drug-fueled rage, rawer-than-your-dick-after-jerking-it-
with-sandpaper brute strength, and so much pants-shitting insanity that the love
child of the Joker and Bane would be tame as a field mouse by comparison.
Like his eventual coke and dbol-fortified tag team partners, the Mad Max-
inspired, freakishly coiffed, angriest tag team on Earth, the Road Warriors, the
Ultimate Warrior's go to move was the gorilla press slam, which requires less
athleticism than one would get out of Stephen Hawking but more brute strength
than you'd get out of ten meatheads at the nearest powerlifting "destination gym"
to complete. It is for these reasons, then, that the Ultimate Warrior’s life and
training methods require investigation.
The Ultimate Warrior’s Vital Stats
Height : 6'3"
Weight : 280 lbs.
Gorilla Press : 303 lbs (Hulk Hogan)
Bench Press : 550 lbs (gym)
Sanity : Nonexistent
Awesomeness : Incalculable.Perhaps you're thinking that the above list of

strength accolades doesn't warrant a place among guys like Arthur Saxon,
because he's never been a competitive lifter. You're thinking like old people
fuck- badly and in blatant defiance of the will of the gods. The Warrior hails
from a bygone era in which bodybuilders actually lifted heavy. When Warrior
hit the mat for the first time, he was part of a generation of bodybuilders like
Eddie Robinson (610 bench press in competition at under 200 lbs.), Tim Belknap
(renown for being a flaming asshole and ruining every barbell in the gyms where
he trained for using insane poundages on partials), and cave-dwelling, psychotic
felon Benny Podda.
Bodybuilders in that era were so strong that they either had competed in and
dominated powerlifting, or were simply content to compete with one another and
heave around enough weight to smash a herd of mastodons flat. Not only that,
but the Warrior eventually became tag team partners and ostensibly trained with
the Legion of Doom, which would mean that he was both psychotic and
incredibly strong. LOD were well known for moving massive weights, hitting
bench presses of over 600lbs (even with broken ribs) and shrugging over a
thousand just because it was Tuesday, and because no more weight would fit on
the bar. Not only that, but the LOD were also famous for being shitty wrestlers,
and pretty much relied solely on massive physical trauma and press slams to stop
their opponents, both of which were the mainstays of the Warrior's wrestling
repertoire.
YOU DESERVE NOT TO BREATHE THE ATMOSPHERE THAT WE

WALK IN.
Though true wrestling aficionados bag on them like they're Clinique counter
girls at Macy's talking shit on Amy Weinhouse's crack whore makeup motif
(only likely in a far more effeminate manner, as I've yet to meet a true wrestling
mark who doesn't live in his parents basement and appear to spend the bulk of
his time stealing and sniffing his mother's shoes), all of the most entertaining
wrestlers of the past seem to have been the least technically proficient-
Goldberg, Big Poppa Pump, the Legion of Doom, Hulk Hogan, and Andre The
Giant are living (and dead in the case of half of LOD and the Giant) proof.
Speaking of Andre, the Ultimate Warrior might not have displayed his lifting
prowess on the platform, but he sure as shit hefted that tubby acromegalic goof
off the ground for a body slam when Andre was tipping the scales at 545 lbs.
For those of you who think that's not all that impressive, feel free to try to hoist a
saddie in a scooter at your local Walmart and dump them on their ass. Whether
or not you succeed, you'll be a goddamn legend for trying and will gain valuable
insight into what it feels like to heft about 600 lbs of uncooked cookie dough,
flip it upside down, and smash it on the ground.
Though many of the biggest badasses in history have interesting starts to their
careers, Warrior's is perhaps the most ridiculous- he wanted an ass. On the
lecture circuit, Warrior would frequently tell his audience the story of how “a
skinny little kid befriended a rusty old workout machine and the machine gave
that kid an ass.” And he didn’t even use the term “glutes.” He ignored his own
arms, traps, delts, and pecs and bragged about the ass that machine gave him.
To that end, the Warrior signed on with an all-male review called “PowerTeam
USA,” which inexplicably included a mime, and featured two other random,
jacked and tan, ambiguously gay in a 1990's sort of pink spandex sort of way.
At the same time, Warrior got into competitive bodybuilding, placing decently at
regional shows until he and the other bodybuilding members of PowerTeam
USA decided to make the transition into professional wrestling. The Warrior
debuted as James “Justice” Hellwig in a shitty little Texan federation I recall
seeing on UHF stations on Saturday mornings as a kid, and to my recollection
the ring was octagonal, prefacing the UFC's cage shape by 10 years.
I realize that has absolutely no bearing on the discussion at hand, but I recall
thinking that was a stupid-assed gimmick even as a little kid. By the time he hit
the mat for the WWE, the Warrior had established himself as a bonafide maniac
capable of few legitimate wrestling moves, but also as the single greatest promo
cutter in the history of wrestling. Not event the Rock could touch the Warrior's
stilted, guttural, incoherent rants, so rife with insanity that you couldn't help but
pay attention. I'm honestly not even sure his rants were a work, given that
everything he's done since is equally nonsensical and insane.
Once you’ve witnessed his insanity (check it out on Youtube), it will likely come
as a shock to you that his workouts were not all that exciting. He's admitted a
great many times that he has no idea how many years steroid abuse took off his
life, so those of you chomping at the bit to scream "STEROIDS" can look smug
and pat yourselves on your back. Then, punch yourselves in the fucking face,
because steroid use is so goddamn common in commercial gyms that even in
Belgium, a country that has literally never produced a lifter of note, 25% of of
recreational lifters use gear. Thus, steroids were not the magical panacea for
muscle building and strength you might have thought they were. Instead,
insanity seems to be the primary factor in the Warrior's lifting and career
success, just as it was for Tookie Williams (though Tookie relied pretty heavily
on PCP as well).
Were you to watch the Warrior's training, you would look directly into the face
of a man who's managed to channel enough insanity to fill 100 horror movie
loony bins with gibbering maniacs, self mutilators, and compulsively
masturbating cannibalistic evangelical Christians. I've been around multiple
Special Olympians in my day, and I have never before seen a human being
perform exercises with that much grimacing and slobbering.
That moaning chick at every commercial gym who sounds like she's working her
way through a 50 man gangbang while lifting makes less of a scene than the
Warrior does while warming up. Nick Manning makes less of a spectacle of
himself dropping loads on bitches' faces. A roomful of naked, shit-covered
midgets with Tourette's would draw less attention than the Warrior in your local
Gold's Gym. It's like the Warrior is trying to get his face as jacked as his body
by cutting the most dramatic faces he possibly can in the least amount of time
possible. It's almost as if he's using time under tension for his face, and
somehow it radiates out to the rest of his body. Whether it's intensity or insanity,
however, the shit is clearly working- he looked better at 54 years old than most
people look at 24.
In his later years, the Warrior did what he referred to as a "bodybuilding type of
workout," and was preternaturally excited about the fact that he trained calves.
For the vast majority of his training in his later years, Warrior did 10-15 reps for
each set with warmups in the 30 rep range, though in the past he was known for
going far, far heavier. True to his completely nonsensical form, the Warrior
believed that worked the muscles from the “inside out."
We could spend the next hundred years with linguists, scientists, and
psychologists trying to parse exactly what the hell working a muscle from the
inside out means and would likely be no closer to the answer than we are now.
Nevertheless, it seems to work for the Warrior, who was jacked to goddamn bits
at 50 and angrier than ever. Just ask the band Asking Alexandria if his methods
work- in a pilot for a television show that sadly never saw air, the Warrior spent
the better part of an hour berating the skinny jean clad metallers from that band
for disrespecting him and interrupting himself with a great deal of psychotic
pseudo-intellectualism without ever really putting them through a workout. In
spite of the fact that they learned nothing more than what psychotics smell like
up close, I bet each one of those skinny dickheads put on 5lbs just from being in
the same room as the living embodiment of every fear extremist feminists have
of “machismo” that is the Ultimate Warrior.
I am not exaggerating when I say that the Warrior appeared to make up for
uninspired training routines with full-blown lunacy, skull splitting intensity, and
what appears to have been a dogmatic adherence to a lifelong strict diet and
training routine. If nothing else, this should prove to one and all that your
program doesn't matter nearly as much as the effort and persistence you put into
them. The Warrior's routine literally could not be objectively less interesting,
likely to help him lift a 600lb man off the ground and slam him, or strict press a
wiggling 300lb man overhead, but who needs good programming when you have
maniacal training intensity? One of the Warrior's workout videos literally shows
him spending 20 seconds grabbing random benches and throwing them around
the gym in a manner I previously only believed befit eternally spandex-clad and
Otomix shod douchebag bodybuilder Branch Warren.
As anyone's do over the course of a couple decades, the Warrior's methods

varied pretty widely. Like everyone else, his workouts in the 1970s were 20 rep
squat affairs with a ton of pullovers. In the off-season in the 1980s, Warrior's
routine was pretty standard, but it worked . not only did he look like what Greek
gods would masturbate to the thought of looking like, but he was strong as shit.
And I mean Larry Wheels-esque strong-incline benching 495 for 4, squatting
700, strict barbell rowing 405 for 4, and he could do an old school clean to
overhead press, then sit on a bench with no back and press 360lbs for 6 behind
the neck.
The following is the basic setup of his training routine pieced together from
several sources- as I mentioned, he rarely did the same thing twice, and his
workouts ranged in length from 45 minutes to a few hours on any given day. As
such, this is the basic framework of what he did, but he kept his rests short
except for his heaviest sets and went to failure on every single set, which is
something that is about as out of vogue as jodhpurs in gyms these days, but
definitely a trend that could stand to be revisited, because it worked .
The Warrior's Mass Split
Monday / Thursday: Squats and Deadlifts
Very Close Stance Squat (Tom Platz style) - 12, 10, 8, 2 x 6, 2 x 4
Leg Press - 4 x 6-10

Leg Curl - 4 x 8-12
Leg Extensions - 4 x 8-12
Deadlifts o r Stiff Leg Deadlifts - 12, 10, 8, 2 x 6, 2 x 4
Calf Raises - 4 x 8-12
Tuesdays / Friday: Chest and Back
Barbell Bench Press - 12, 10, 8, 2 x 6, 2 x 4, with the occasional double or

single thrown in for good measure.
Incline Dumbbell Press - 4 x 8-12
Flat Bench Flies - 4 x 8-12

Hammer Strength Rows - 4 x 6-10
Behind the Neck Pulldowns - 4 x 8-12
Pulldowns (alternating back to front) - 4 x 8-12

Weekend: Shoulders and Arms
Stiff Legged Power Clean to Behind the Neck Strict Press - 5 x 4-10 (He
would clean the weight from the floor with form that would make the
weightlifters in your gym stroke out, and power that would make themselves
secretly stroke themselves when alone later that evening. He'd increase the
weight each set and go to absolute failure)
Dumbbell Laterals - 4 x 8-12
Bent Over Laterals - 4 x 12-15
Dumbbell Shrugs - 4 x 20
Preacher Curls - 5 x 4-12
Straight Bar Curls - 5 x 8-12

Dumbbell Curls - 5 x 10-12
Tricep Pushdowns (variety of angles)- 10 x 10-15 (he'd change up the handle

or the angle of movement every couple of sets)
Dumbbell Overhead Extension - 6 x 4-12On the road, at his peak, the Warrior
trained six to seven days a week, occasionally twice a day, keeping his
training to 45 minutes to an hour with short rests These alternated between
two workouts.
The Warrior's Routine on the Road

Day 1 : Chest, Delts and Arms
Day 2 : Back and Legs
Stereotypical of 1990's bodybuilders, these workouts had almost zero rest

between sets, and consisted of one to two sets of three to four exercises per
muscle group, hitting everything from a variety of angles and relying heavily on
Hammer Strength equipment.
And now, to flog the same cold, dead horse I beat every time I do an in-depth
discussion of a lifter- there is no one ideal program, and no program is useless if
you apply enough pants shitting insanity to it. Just look at this dude- is there
anything at all in his program that would indicate that he's capable of moving
prodigious weights? Nope. Will a pack of useless shitbirds content themselves
with simply screaming "STEROIDS!!!!!!!" despite the fact that nearly everyone
in your gym is on shit and none of them can do what the Warrior can do at age
54? Yup. In spite of the fact that everyone knows that excuses are like assholes,
people just don't want to admit that's just what they are, because the only thing
the lot of us should really be injecting is a truly terrifying dose of insanity- that's
where the goddamned gains come from. And if you don't believe me, here is an
email from the man himself.
“Overtraining. Got quite a few emails about my comment that I

believe overtraining is (another) sissy modern-day concept -- and
BS.
Many of you who commented couldn't believe I said such a thing.

You think I should explain myself -- "if you can," you snidely add.
Apparently, you're concerned young kids following my BODY
advice might be "mislead." Going by your training standards
today, you might be right. Young kids who follow my advice would
be mislead in how to become champions -- winners. And God
knows, we can't have any winners in our culture today. Not when
kids are "lead" to be losers.
I found it interesting that the majority of you commentators seem
to think you also read that I said rest or recovery is not necessary
at all. Along with disagreeing with me by believing overtraining is
possible and legit, you support your beliefs by chastising me, "You
know rest is important for the body to recover, Warrior, so I don't
understand why you would put forward any idea that it is not."
Yes, Einsteins, I do. I do know rest and recovery is important. I

never said they were not. I never put forward any idea as you
imagine. You read something into what I actually said that was not
there at all.
What I said -- and absolutely still stand by -- is that overtraining is not

possible unless you believe so in your mind. Oh, and it is BS.
Like most of the modern day theories intended to stifle action but
stimulate a lot of yakkity-yak, overtraining is one of those state-of-
the-art suppositions that keep people from doing the THREE tried-
and-true things they actually most need to do to build up their
physiques or their physical strength: Train. Train Hard. And
TRAIN HARDER.
For good measure you might want to throw in a fourth thing if the
three above don't seem to be working.
Back in my bodybuilding days it was typical to train bodyparts

three times per week, including even the compound exercises-
squats, deadlifts, bent over rows and heavy bench. I continually
and progressively got huge and strong (all the monsters I knew
then did too). Gritting, grinding, grunting, gnarling and
growling were training concepts regularly witnessed, but
overtraining? Never heard of it. Train big. Eat big. Get plenty of
good, sound rest. Period.
All kinds of bodybuilders and strength athletes thrived off this
simple three-part formula. This was before they had all the
theories, all the science, all the trainer certifications, and all the
mad, over-the-top chemical experimentation that goes on today.
During my sports entertainment career, for over 5 years of a
practically straight-through tour of duty, I traveled on a plane
nearly every day, never missed any hardcore HIT workouts (no
less than 6 days per week), survived on 3-4 hours sleep a night,
and ate mostly 5-6 cans of tuna fish per day (and practically
nothing else when I could not find eating establishments that
served good, clean food). Many times, I would go 24 hour periods
without any other kind of food -- no carbs, no fats...just tuna out of
the can. That's 24 hours where I would have also executed my
workout and performed a wrestling match. I worked nearly every
night of the year, pushing my body and energy reserves to the
absolute limit. My success was dependent on my physique and
physical conditioning. It was not something I could leave to
chance or give silly, half-ass attention to. The limited caloric
intake and the extreme workload never manifested anything but
the most positive effects. My body ALWAYS took whatever exertion
I subjected it to and it responded by getting better and better over
time even though the mental and physical demands became
greater and greater at the same time.”
Number Four: TRAIN EVEN HARDER.
Training is what people of all ages, young and old, need to

concentrate on before they think too much about doing anything
else -- including the silly idea that they might be overtraining.
Actually, doing the exercise work at hand will do wonders for your
body you would not believe. I guess, though, this isn't a training
method scientific enough for today's trainers and trainees. On the
other hand, thinking and talking too much can actually prohibit
training altogether. Go figure. Walk into any gym today and see
this self-evident truth at work for yourself.
Young recruits today think they need supplements like pro-
hormones and NO2 stimulants before they even go to the gym and
experience what it is like to grab the iron and throw it around for
a while. In my mind, a long while, say 3-5 years, for starters.
Maybe after they put in that kind of time and commitment they can
start having some serious thoughts about what might be important
next.
I must get 50 emails a day asking me what is the best prohormone,

and what is most important, working out? OR food and
supplements? And they do not mean food and supplements to go
along with the working out they would do at the same time. They
mean -- is it more important to eat food and take supplements OR
workout to build my body? Yes, fellow warrior, you are
understanding me correctly in the way I've written this. Somehow
or other these kids have the idea that they can eat food and
supplements without working out and build their bodies that way.
Exercise might not be necessary according to the newfangled
bodybuilding theories they hold.
This is a direct result of the fraud and idiocy the health and fitness
industry perpetuates, to sustain their desire to keep people
ignorant, stupid, and confused. If a young kid is going to be
mislead, and potentially do harm to himself, it is the modern-day
crap that it is going to cause it, not me saying overtraining is bs.
My advice will actually help the kid.
The problem with young people today is that they are doing too
much theorizing and talking and not enough damn work. It's no
mystery that athletic champions in any sport put in a lot of hours -
- a full day's work of 8-10 hours working on what needs to be
done to succeed at the highest level.
How all this BS started that the body of person working out with
weights can only handle 90 minutes of training a day only a few
times per week, and the remainder of the time should be spent
laying around eating gourmet health foods and shoveling down
expensive supplementation, I don't know.
But I do know it is all BS because I speak from experience that

undisciplined, weak-minded individuals and skinny fitness-
training theory freaks never had. All of this nonsense came from
out of the minds of midgets who saw big money in marketing easy
muscle building strategies to the masses of lazy, afraid-of-hard-
work losers like themselves.
Sounds like excuses to me. Damn pathetic ones. Ones not tolerated
around here. Get to the gym, shut the hell up and train your guts
and brain out. Your body will tell you when it needs rest and
recovery. When it does, give it some.
But don't be a slave to its whining. Your best and most effective
muscle building workouts will be when you least feel like going to
the gym. Don't be a sissy to soreness and hard work -- or even
pain. Try it -- I promise, if you are serious about building muscle,
you'll love it.
If being big and muscular was natural, we'd all be big and
muscular. Your goal to be huge is not natural and your body is
going to try and come up with all kinds of excuses because it does
not like what you are making it do. Tough shit. Engage Mind over
Matter and go back and torture the crap out of it again.
Any kid out there training 5, 6 or 7 days a week and doing

everything and anything, giving it his all, keeping his attitude
positive, paying attention to what his body is telling him, drinking
gobs of milk and not worrying about whether he has the new age
supps -- now, that's a kid you do need to be afraid of. There's a kid
you will want to keep your eye on. Why? He's been mislead, and
he's certain to be a future champion -- and warrior.
Kicking your OWN ass is the best way to discover
what it takes to kick the ass of your competitor
-- in any game or sport. Leave your OWN
blood and guts in the training arena and your
opponent will leave his on the battlefield.
Goldberg: Train Like an Athlete and You’ll Perform
Like One
Anyone who has ever seen Goldberg in action knows that the man was a beast in
the ring, and one of the more physically imposing humans to ever wrestle.
Goldberg wasn’t the biggest, by any stretch of the imagination, but at 6’2” and
270-280, a man who’s athletic enough to man open field tackles on all-time
leading NFL rusher Emmitt Smith in his prime is a man who can put a hurt on
anyone. By the time he made his way to the WCW, Goldberg had packed on
even more mass, and was strong enough to casually gorilla press slam 280lb
Scott Steiner with an ease that made it look more like he was smashing the
corpse of a small child into the mat than a wriggling mass of oily testosterone
and beef.
Although his training is definitely heavy on the Hammer Strength movements

these days, these exercises are the basis of the training program that gave
Goldberg enough strength and power to be one of the most intimidating men on
the planet, even in his 50s. Though his sets and reps have never been provided,
the nature of the program would lead me to suggest you could easily insert the
sets and reps used in the Chinese weightlifting routines here.
Monday- Cleans and Squats
Heavy Cleans
Light Snatches
Olympic Squats
Weighted Back Extensions
Hammer Strength Four Way Neck Machine
Tuesday- Snatches and Incline Bench
Heavy Snatches
Light Cleans
Close-Grip Incline Barbell Press

Weighted Dips
Hammer Strength Four Way Neck Machine
Thursday- Overhead and Back
Behind-The-Neck Push Presses
T-Bar Rows
Weighed Close-Grip Pull-Ups

Standing Sit-Ups
Friday- More Overhead and High Pulls
High Pulls
Military Press
Dumbbell Clean and Press
Decline Dumbbell Press
Standing Sit-Ups
Diet: This Shit Ain’t That Hard
Diet is as much a matter of personal expression as body painting naked people at

an orgy. If you put zero effort into it, you will get zero results… and you will
likely struggle to get laid, because if you can’t see your junk, it’s unlikely that
anyone else is going to want to see it either. And that is not simply in regards to
making the correct food choices- that means eating, period. Far too many lifters
fall into the trap of making bizarrely small portion choices, focusing on the
wrong things, and generally sabotaging their performance with idiotic dietary
decisions.
That said, this is not a diet book. What you’re getting is the bare bones basics of
a dietary prescription, because it seems no one absorbs information on diet in
one go. Or twenty. Or one hundred. It seems diet is one of those things with
which you must be smacked in the face until you’re only half aware that you’ve
agreed to try it, and even then, only under duress.
You might be fat, you might be skinny, and you might be somewhere in
between. Whatever you are, you can rest assured that there is no magical diet
that is going to fix whatever mess you’re looking at when you look into the
mirror. Before you just throw up your hands and dive face first into the ice
cream like your name is Honey Boo Boo, however, know that eating to be a
beast is far less complex than people make it out to be. All that shit you’ve
heard about your physique being 90% diet are horseshit- getting in competition
shape once you’re already jacked and lean is 90% diet. Getting jacked and
strong, however, is likely more like 50% training and 50% diet.
If you want the quickest and dirtiest diet prescription on earth, it’s this:
If you’re trying to gain weight , use double your bodyweight (in pounds) in
grams of protein. That is one third of your calories. Split the other two thirds
evenly between fat and carbs and keep your sugar as close to zero as possible.

So, if you’re 200 lbs, eat 400g of protein (1600 calories), 400g of carbs (1600),
and 178g of fat (~1600). With that split you should put on a decent amount of
lean mass without too much flubber.
If you want a fairly slow and easy recomposition diet , 1.5 times your
bodyweight in grams of protein and make that 40% of your calories. That
means you have 1800 calories split evenly between fat and carbs, so 225g
of carbs and 100g of fat.
If you want to end up crazy shredded , there are half a million diets out
there from which you can choose. The one that has brought me the most
success if my Apex Predator Diet, which is a cyclical ketogenic diet too
involved to discuss in this book, but is simple enough to Google (“Plague
of Strength” “Apex Predator Diet”) or you can snag my Issuance of
Insanity 3 ebook at Chaosandpain.com, that gives an exhaustive rundown
on a ton of dietary stuff and ketogenic diets particular.
With that in mind...
Unless You’re Already a Disgusting Landbeast (and I

Mean Landbeast, not “Could Be Leaner”), Bulk, then
Cut
Having been positively besieged with questions over the years asking how lean a
person should be before bulking, I thought it was high time to introduce a new
generation to the modern human marvel- Bruce Randall, a strongman,
powerlifter, and bodybuilder famous in the 1950s for making an insane amount
of progress in a very short period of time. I realize that it's all the rage to traipse
through your fitness club in skin tight capri pants and a melon colored string
tank top, checking out your abs between lackadaisical sets of whatever Jeff Seid
happens to be recommending these days, but if you actually want to impress
real, live people when you walk down the street as a physically imposing and
impressive human mountain, chicken breasts, kale, and P90x isn't going to cut it.
And before we delve in, bear this in mind this quote from strength sports
historian Steve Neece:
"We must remember that although testosterone was being manufactured by

1935, it was almost never used by people in the iron game. Remember also that
1957 was several years before Bill March, Tony Garcy, and Lou Riecke— aided
by John Ziegler— introduced anabolic steroids to the strength sports in this
country. Dianabol was not manufactured until 1958."
I realize that for anyone reading this while rocking athleisure clothing, this
revelation will come as a goddamn shocker, but it's true. The only person of
whom I can think who successfully shreds and then lean bulks is Sylvester
Stallone, cited above. As such, I am not saying it is not possible to do, but it's a
mostly idiotic way to go about things for most people. A far better example to
follow would be a person like the aforementioned wrestler Bruno Sammartino
(in the Wrestlers segment), who gained over 100 lbs of muscle in 4 years and set
a bunch of lifting records while doing it, or the man pictured above, Bruce
Randall. Bulking hard and then cutting allows you to overeat like crazy to pack
on muscle, which is easy enough to hang onto if you keep your protein high.
Actor Sylvester Stallone is the reigning world champion of cutting, then

bulking. "[W]hen I did Rambo III, I didn’t like the way I looked anymore, so I
decided to reshape myself. I went down to 168 pounds. I put on weight slowly
and got sinewy, hard-cut muscles. I wound up weighing about 200. But it was all
muscle – my body fat was down to 3.8 percent. Now my fat count is 6.8. I’m
5’10” and weigh 187 pounds."
So, having already written about Sammartino's methods, allow me to introduce
you to Bruce Randall- at 6'2", his weight ranged anywhere from 183 to 401lbs.
In the course of his career, the man managed to gain world renown for his
strength, then gained even more renown for shredding like crazy and winning
the Mr. Universe title against some renowned strongmen in 1959. The thing that
made him stand out in my mind (for which I unfortunately couldn't find a
citation) is neither of those things, though- it's that once he cut down he was so
unaccustomed to his own strength that he grabbed a bench to do some benching
and noticed everyone staring at him. When he set the bench down, he realized
the goddamn thing had been bolted into the ground, but he was able to rip it out
of its moorings with no more effort than what it took to pick up a bench.
Before we get going, I know half of you are going to call bullshit on his weights
and progress, but the dude was heavily documented by Iron Man magazine the
entire time. The other half of you are going to talk shit about his programs,
because the knee jerk reaction for people these days is to say "that's horseshit
and you're a lying pussy" rather than actually considering the implications of
what you are reading actually might teach you something, rather than just
reinforcing what you think you know. That said, let's delve into the story of a
man whose life tale is so tall it's like Mark Henry and Johnny Appleseed double
teamed Calamity Jane to create a man who makes Paul Bunyan seem like a punk
bitch in comparison.
Bruce Randall was a professional bodybuilder and insanely strong guy who leapt
into the public eye early in life and disappeared from public view just as
quickly. Born in 1931, Randall didn't actually start lifting until he was of legal
drinking age, and only did so at 21 because he needed to weigh 225lbs to play
for the base football team in the Marines. Approaching the base lifting coach,
Chief Petty Officer Walter Metzler, Randall explained he needed to pack on
mass as quickly as possible so he could go out and be the crazy white Lawrence
Taylor of the armed services. So at a bodyweight of 203lbs, Randall began his
training with weird as hell program and an ingeniously simple diet that initially
just included an extra loaf of bread, quart of milk, pork chop, or whatever he
could get during every meal.
Clearly, that dietary methodology is so simple a six year old could have figured
it out, but frankly it never once occurred to me to try that sort of thing- luckily
for all of us, it's never too late to try to pack on 30 pounds of mass in six weeks.
His program was also incredibly simple, and although you'll all hate it, his
methodology was sound.
Having grown up in an era where you're gonna get mocked for skipping legs,
you would likely all write a beginner program based around the Olympic lifts or
power lifts in an effort to engage as many muscle groups as possible. Randall,
on the other hand, said fuck that noise. Instead of doing some lame fucking 5x5
program wherein you are allegedly going to get huge off three days of lackluster
lifting a week, Randall did the following program 6-7 days a week.
His logic?
"I found that in my case I could work on my arms almost every
day and make gains. I assume that this is due to the natural
recuperative powers of the arms. Because they are always in use
they seem to be able to regain total strength with just one night’s
rest and are ready for more the next day."
In short- you can make serious hypertrophy progress training your arms every
day like a goddamn maniac, but the same couldn't be said for a program
comprised of squats and deadlifts. You'd fall apart faster than a scarecrow in a
tornado.
Randall's First Routine, Aka the "Curls for the Girls" Routine
Strict Barbell Curls – 3 x 6-8 x 100lbs
Dumbbell Concentration Curls – 3 x 5-6 x 50lbs
Overhead Tricep Extensions / French Press – 3 x 6-8 x 70lbs
Dumbbell Kickbacks – 3 x 6-8 x 35lbs
Dumbbell Preacher Curls – 3 x 6-8 x 45lbs

His weights are the weights he started the program with, so a couple of years of
chopping wood prior to starting this program definitely paid off as unplanned
preparation for lifting. He'd start with six reps per set, and as he grew stronger he
would wait until he hit eight reps for all three sets, then increase the weight and
start back at six. With this program and diet, Bruce Randall's progress was
nothing short of pants-shitting (both figuratively and likely literally). In six
weeks, he increased his weight from 203lbs to 225lbs and his arms grew from
arms increased from 16” to 17.5”. Because football was still a few months off,
Randall decided to change his goal to gain another 25lbs using the same routine
and diet, and he got his weight up to 265lbs.
Clearly, this kind of weight gain and progress is just goddamn ridiculous, but it
should immediately indicate to every last one of us that we eat like Angelina
Jolie and we need to level the fuck up at the dinner table. Lest you think I am
suggesting that we all should get fat as shit to pack on mass, I'm not. There is a
happy medium between gaining 200 lbs in two years and applying similar
principles to this in order to quickly gain mass, or to smash through sticking
points (and there is definitely evidence that our collective sticking points are due
in large part to eating like fucking hummingbirds.
So at 265lbs, Randall decided it was time to take his diet to the next level and
alter his training to involve the larger muscle groups. The following just the
basis of his training, and he would add exercises as time permitted. Again, he
started with three sets of each exercise, dropping the starting reps to 3-5, and
adding weight when he hit 8 reps. His starting weights were still light, but recall
at that point lifters had to clean the weight to their chests and fall back into a
high incline board for incline barbell press, which definitely increased the level
of difficulty considerably. He took as long as he felt he needed in between sets,
often lifting from 3 to 5 hours a day .
Bruce Randall called- you’re not training enough .
The Basis of Bruce Randall's Second Routine

Dumbbell Bench Press – sets of 5-8 x 120lbs
Decline Dumbbell Bench Press – sets of 5-8 x 130lbs
Incline Barbell Press – sets of 5-8 x 250lbs
Good Morning – sets of 3-5 x 295lbs
If you are wondering, like I was, why the squat still wasn't in this program, I
have your answer right here:
"Randall originally shied away from the squat because of a serious injury
there years previously in which he broke his leg in seven places.
He would periodically test his strength in the movement and
attributed the hard work in the good morning exercise for
allowing him to squat 680lbs. He actually once took a shot at a
750lbs good morning but had to drop the bar because the weights
shifted on him."
It was with this program, just under a year into lifting, that he managed to win an
Olympic weightlifting competition, in spite of the fact he trained less for it than
most people train for fun runs. In December of 1953, 11 months after he started
training, Randall entered his first meet, the Capital District, and won with a
300lb press, 230lb snatch, 315lb clean and jerk, and 845lb total.
As his training evolved to suit his heavier training with more compound lifts, so
did his diet. Centered around four massive meals (a cafeteria tray filled to
overflowing with rice and pork for dinner, or a breakfast of his typical breakfast,
consisting of 28 fried eggs, loaf and half of bread and two quarts of milk) a day,
at 6:30am, 11:30am, 4:30pm, and 9:30pm. Between meals he didn't snack
beyond drinking milk, of which he drank a fucking unreal amount (8-10 quarts
on average). When I say unreal, I'm talking unicorns that fart cinnamon and
sneeze rainbows unreal- at least one time he drank nearly five gallons in a day,
which gave him almost 15,000 calories and 600 grams of protein just by
themselves.
“I remember one incident that happened to me at lunch. I weighed

about 330 at the time and came to lunch ready to eat like a horse.
They were serving a favorite Chinese dish of mine, fried rice with
pork. It happened that I was eating at the Navy mess hall at the
time and so had a metal tray with five different compartments in it
to eat from. Well, I filled the entire tray with rice and pork. The
mound was so high that if another spoonful was added it would
run over the side of the tray.
Carefully balancing the tray so as not to drops a precious grain, I
made my way back to a table amid incredulous stares from every
sailor in the hall. Upon sitting down and tasting a few spoonfuls I
found the rice to be slightly undercooked. The center of each grain
was a little pasty and absorbed all the moisture in my mouth when
I chewed. In order to solve this frustrating dilemma, I secured
several quart bottles of water and proceeded to eat the rice with a
swig of water every so often.
Under this procedure I was able to finish the entire tray of fried
rice and pork (I made it an absolute rule to finish everything I
took. Wasting food is an unpardonable sin!). Upon getting up, I
was, to put it mildly, sufficiently filled. When I arrived back at the
Marine Barracks I found myself feeling rather strange sensations
going on in the region of my stomach. I made a hasty retreat to my
bed and lay upon my back for five hours taking short panting
breaths because I found that deep breathing caused even more
pressure on the stomach. Thereafter I made quite certain that the
rice was well cooked before I loaded up the tray."
Those of you who remember the Saxon Trio's eating habits will note even they
would have thought this was just an egregious amount of food and milk, and the
man's bedroom must have smelled like a Turkish bathhouse in which Gary
Busey and Nick Nolte had been doing squats. If you slept in a sewer you
probably would have breathed better than you could in this man's room. And
Randall gave less fucks than Deadpool would while donkeypunching Gina
Carano in the middle of a child sex ring- he actually once said that if he'd pushed
his weight to 500lbs he could have deadlifted 1000lbs.
Putting aside that Randall's bedroom must've smelled like a camel threw up eggs
onto a pile of cow shit, and his bathroom was likely considered a Hazard Zone
by every governmental agency in the country, we'll go back to his training.
Randall said he never really had a "set" program, but he did specifically alter his
training to the following, done five to six times a week:
Incline Clean and Press (pictured) – sets of 3-5 x 355 lbs
Quarter Front Squat – sets of 6-8, 1,010 lbs

DB Bench Press – sets of 3-5 x 205 lbs
DB Decline Press – sets of 3-5 x 195 lbs
Good Morning – sets of 3-5 x 565 lbs

His training kept changing from then on, rotating in and out various exercises
(but usually keeping the total exercise count to six) that constantly ramped up
the insanity as he tested his digestive system and his body's ability to adapt. By
the time he had two years of training under his belt, Randall's lifts were among
the best in the world at the time.
Randall's Best Lifts (after 2 years of training, at 335-410lbs)
Military Press – 365lbs x 2; 375 x 1
Squat – 680lbs
Good Morning – 685lbs (Bent knees, back parallel to the floor)
Deadlift – 730lbs x two reps; 770 x 1
Strict Curl – 242lbs

Dumbbell Bench Press – 220-pound dumbbells x 2
Bench Press – 482lbs (with a 3-second pause on the chest)
Decline Dumbbell Bench Press – 220lb dumbbells
¼ Front Squat – 1,320lbs

Incline Clean and Press – 380lbs x 3; 410 x 1
It seems that his switch in diet happened basically on a whim he mentioned to a

friend, that he wanted to “look at life from the other side of the weight picture,”
and his friend essentially told him he was out of his motherfucking mind, which
only served to strengthen his resolve. I can respect that kind of motivation,
because as I've written in the past, spite is an amazing motivator.
"As far as I was concerned there is no such word as "never" in a lifter’s

vocabulary."
Taking up the challenge like a heroin addict takes up a fentanyl habit, Bruce
knew he would have to immediately change both his diet and his routine.
Interestingly, he had the exact opposite opinion about the matter than Arnold,
though they both ended up at the same conclusion using the same simile.
Whereas in Pumping Iron Arnold said, "you look in the mirror and you say,
okay, I need a bit more deltoids ... so that the proportion's right, and ... you
exercise and put those deltoids on, whereas an artist would just slap on some
clay on each side," Bruce Randall said, "take a sculptor about to create a statue.
He takes a big, ungainly piece of rock and with a hammer and chisel he chips
away at it until the desired effect is created." At 401lbs, Randall saw himself as
that big, ungainly piece of rock, and the weights and diet were his hammer and
chisel. With that in mind, he reversed his previous methods and reduced his food
intake at each meal, trying to keep his protein and green vegetables high while
cutting back on starches and fats.
At the same time he reduced his food intake, he increased his volume in a way
only a dangerously psychotic and probably self-destructive person would,
training 6-7 hours a day (and once 27 hours in two days and 81 hours in that
week), 6-7 days a week (and once 27 days in a row) doing more than 20
exercises with 4-5 sets of 12-15 reps apiece. He also started walking daily,
gradually increasing his walks and pace until after a month he would walk/jog,
and was running 3-5 miles a day by the end of his 9 month cut. And if you say
that's going to kill your lifts, no it won't- you're just being an excuse-making
pussy. According to the man himself, "I found that it did not adversely affect my
workouts in the gym and in addition to the above mentioned benefits it increased
my stamina and endurance greatly."
His workout was as unconventional and volume dense-as-a-black-hole as you

would guess:
Randall's "Reduction" Routine
Situps, L eg raises, H anging L eg R aises – sets of 20-50
Bodyweight Squats – sets of 20
Leg Curls – sets of 25
Leg Extensions – sets of 25
Bench Press – sets of 15-20
Flyes – sets of 15-20
Chins – sets of 15-20

Dips – sets of 15-20
Curls – sets of 15-20
Rows – sets of 15-20

Upright Rows – sets of 15-25
Seated Dumbbell Press – sets of 10-15
Incline Bench Press – sets of 10-15

More Abdominal Work – sets of 25-50
Miscellaneous optional exercises at the end of each workout

If that's not insane enough for you, his 1956 New Year’s resolution was to do
5000 situps a day for the first 15 days of 1956.... in addition to all of the other ab
training he did. He credited that with his waspish waist, which was an amazingly
trim 33", and whatever else it did, that resolution confirmed that the man was
indeed crazier the Heath Ledger Joker on angel dust and flakka. He did,
however, say that in retrospect his reps and sets should have been reversed,
much as I have, loudly and repeatedly, over the last ten years.
"I prefer to REDUCE the repetitions and INCREASE the number of

sets."
"To illustrate the above point let us take the following example.
Instead of performing 3 sets of 20 repetitions per exercise, I would
prefer to perform 10 sets of 6 repetitions per exercise when
training for definition. Let us say that we were able to do 3 sets of
20 reps with 100 pounds in the curl. Now, if we were to increase
the sets to 10 and reduce the reps to 6 we would be able to
increase the weight substantially to, let us say, 150 pounds! The
point is that at the end of the exercise we have performed exactly
the same amount of repetitions. However, on the high set, low rep
principal, we use 50% more weight thus accomplishing more
work and therefore burning more energy which is necessary in
order to reduce fat and attain definition.
Remember, it is the amount of energy you have burned up which in
turn is determined by the amount of work you have performed that
will determine the amount of fat reduction. This approach to
definition should also enable the trainee to retain a great degree
of muscle density, at the same time encouraging greater definition.
The writer is not suggesting that the reader follow the idea of 10
sets necessarily. It is true that the more sets you perform the
longer will be the length of your workout. It is also true, however,
that it is necessary to put in many long workouts in order to bring
the body around to top contest condition. Ask any top physique
winner and you will find that this is true."
In the end, Bruce Randall was eating like most kids online claim they're eating
when they "literally can't eat another thing." How those kids have such tiny
appetites almost as big a mystery as how the formerly competitive-eater level
Randall got his food intake down that low.
By the time Randall was down to 183 in 1956, he was eating the following:
Breakfast
2 soft boiled eggs
Plain pint of skim milk
Glass of orange juice

Apple
Lunch
Salad, dates and nuts

Dinner
Round Steak
Two vegetables
Quart skim milk with additional powdered milk

Gelatin
Coffee (Occasionally)
As you can see below, his first couple of competitions didn't go quite as well as
Bruce Randall would have liked- but the man remained undeterred. When he
stepped onstage in 1956, Bruce had increased his weight up to 219 lbs.,
continuing his bizarre weight yo-yo. In 1957, Randall took a different tack and
went lighter, coming in 6th weighing 195 lbs. At that point he was walking
around at a much more reasonable 203lbs-240lbs in the offseason, and won in
1959 weighing 231lbs, four pounds lighter and an inch shorter than Arnold
Schwarzenegger, who would win it nine years later.
Bruce Randall's Competition History
1956 – Mr. America – AAU, 13th

1957 – Mr. America – AAU, 6th
1958 – Universe – Pro – NABBA, Tall, 2nd
1959 – Universe – Pro – NABBA, Tall, 1st
1959 – Universe – Pro – NABBA, Overall Winner
“ I constantly put personal goals before myself and these goals

acted as a stimulus of sorts. In other words, I would set a date,
perhaps three weeks hence, when I would try to accomplish
some change such as a loss of 12 pounds or a reduction around
the chest or waist of several inches. This idea of using goals is
something that I learned when I was gaining weight and
strength. I would tell myself that at a certain date I would
press or deadlift, etc., such a poundage. Thus I found myself
constantly challenged and I love challenges!"
And that is essentially where the Bruce Randall story ends. He fell off the map
and no one really heard from him again. Likely, he burnt himself out and just
didn't have it in him to keep training. On top of that, his unconventional
methods and ridiculous training volume lent themselves about as well to
coaching athletes as John Belushi's party practices would have lent themselves to
leading AA meetings. In any event, the man is a fucking textbook on how a
zero-fucks-given attitude and big brass balls can push you to the forefront of the
strength game.
Incidentally, if you're worried about the bullshit you read about how yo-yo
dieting will kill you faster than ingesting plutonium, Randall lived to the
ripe old age of 87, probably just to prove one unnecessarily awesome point.
A couple of gems Randall had for people regarding training were:
● “I did do one exercise during this time which may have had some
influence on my squat. This was the good morning exercise. When I
reached over 400 lbs. on this exercise I found that I could not do the
exercise in the strict sense because I had to band at the knees in order to
compensate for the weight at the back of the neck. I made 685 in this
manner with my back parallel to the floor and once almost made 750 but
was forced to dump it because of a shift in the weight."
● “I found the ¼ Front Squats helped me push-press heavy weights and

believe it to be a fine exercise."
● When cutting- “I use powdered milk and skim milk mixed together, thus
increasing the protein content. I also took coffee at times finding it tended
to curtail my appetite."
● Just as Mac from It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia said about his
season-long weight gain, Randall felt good at his heaviest. "Actually, I felt
fine when weighing 400 pounds but found that I perspired freely and had a
bit of trouble getting about the city. Of course, I needed great amounts of
sleep and food. My food bill (early ‘50s) was never under $80 per week
and very often well over $100. I know that if I wanted to gain again I
could weight 500 lbs. in 18 months’ time."
● On doing anything you believe you can- "Many people say that added
weight is not necessary to become stronger. Perhaps they are right, but in
my case, it was necessary because I believed it was. "
● "I would suggest that those who find it difficult to refrain from the cake
pie and candy routine remind themselves that each candy bar will cost
them another 500 situps to work off! I found this to be a very persuasive
means of combating temporary dietary temptations!"
● Finally, all you Zyzz- and Jeff Seid-loving goofs out there take note- "
Remember that anyone can have the definition he desires if he is
willing to train and will apply a little “exercise” of the will power. In
conclusion I think it might be wise to add that there is a time to be
extremely defined and a time not to be quite so defined. I feel that it is
unwise to maintain an extreme degree of definition for great lengths of
time because, by reducing the body fat to an absolute minimum, one also
reduces his resistance and may subject his body to colds and many other
possible illnesses."
So what have we learned? First, we learned once again that the form Nazis out
there can take a big step back and literally fuck their own faces. We also learned
that literally anything is possible if you set your mind to it and go balls-to-the-
goddamn-wall. Finally, it should also seem fairly obvious to anyone paying
attention that bulking at the outset to build strength and size makes far more
sense than trying to achieve and maintain Instagram-ready abs at all times.
Frankly, I wish I'd dirty bulked in my formative years, so I could maintain a
higher set-point of muscle mass, rather than constantly scraping and scratching
to gain a little muscle every year on a diet of rice and chicken... plus, pizza is
delicious.
A bit of food for thought, at least.
"Singleness of mind and the willpower to stick to something with the

courage to go on in spite of what people might say is a great
factor to success."
Another Case for Bulking First- The Story of 1980s

Powerlifting Monster George Hechter
George Hechter was a fat kid. I seriously fat kid. Competing in powerlifting as
a heavyweight, Hechter was a walking heart attack with a 24” neck and 24”
arms, and he must’ve snored so loudly he’d shatter windows and crack the
plaster on the ceiling at night, but the man was strong as a bull. Competing in
the early years of single ply, he managed a 975lb squat and a 584 bench, but
when his lifts stopped moving up, he figured he needed to switch it up. Thus,
Hechter began one of the most impressive fat losses this side of Bruce Randall,
and in nine months went from the Blob to an extremely hirsute Colossus.
To wrap your head around this fat loss adventure, we’re talking about a man who
drank two to three gallons of whole milk every day of his life. A man who took
fourth in the 1985 World Strongest Man to Geoff Capes and Jon Pall, but
looking at him you’d have thought he was a competitive hot dog eater, not a
lifter. Given that information, you’d think there would be article after article
about how Hechter managed that feat, but there’s not.
Instead, there are multiple accounts of how Hechter gained his weight in the first
place. How he built his strength. How he rose to the top of the lifting world in a
very short period of time but chugging milk and smashing weights... and that’s
because losing bodyfat is easy as hell .
The Hepburn Routine
What Hechter used to build his strength was actually a methodology developed
by Doug Hepburn, a strongman, weightlifter, and proto-powerlifter who was the
first man to officially bench press 400, 450, and 500 pounds. In spite of having a
clubfoot, Hepburn was a massive squatter and deadlifter who could hit 800 on
both lifts and set a world record in the press in his short stint as an Olympic
weightlifter. He developed this strength primarily through the use of a lot of
singles.
Monday - Bench
Wednesday - Squat
Friday - Deadlift
For each of these, he would work up to singles close to his max, then back off
and do five sets of five. For instance, if you have a max of 335, your sets would
look like this:
Warmup sets of 135×5, 225×5, 275×3, 295×2
Five singles with 325

5 x 5 x 275 (82%1RM)
For deadlifts, Hechter had another trick up his sleeve- he’d clean his warmups.
He would start off and power clean 135 lbs, 225 lbs, 315 lbs, and 405 lbs. At
495, he would high pull the weight, and then start deadlifting the weight at 585.
Doing his warmups that way gave him sick speed off the floor, and that
translated into more weight pulled
With that program, chugging milk all day long and eating sandwiches between
sets, Hechter got huge and crazy strong- he went from 250lbs to 360lbs and put
over 400lbs on his squat, 200+lbs on his bench, and 300lbs on his deadlift in the
span of five years, then got ripped and crushed ass like a champ for a while (and
even improved his deadlift at the lighter weight).
In short- worry about getting big and strong first- that’s

the hard part. Any asshole can get abs by eating like a
little bitch, but the rub of that story is you’ll end up lifting
like one, too.
A Month of Meals for Assholes
Some of these are legit recipes, others are just things we just throw together at
Casa de la Chaos. This is a GUIDELINE, not a diet plan. While Jamie is content
to eat the same thing (steak with chimichurri) over and over, Tara hates doing
that, while insisting on eating like an unattended five year old at a birthday party.
There are things that become lifesavers if you work long hours:
● Squeeze bottles of herbs
● Pre chopped garlic
● Store bought rotisserie chicken
● Pre chopped, pre-cleaned ANYTHING actually
● Glass meal prep containers
● Premade or jarred pasta sauces
● Fairlife Milk
● Atkins’ frozen meals (I live on these during the construction busy
season, honestly)
● Frozen veggies
● Crockpots, Ninja Foodies, Instapots
Are homemade better tasting and slightly healthier? Yeah. Are you doing
yourself any favors being up all night chopping shit and cooking to get your
meal prep done? Get real. Most if not all of these recipes can be made in bulk
and frozen into single servings (or multiple if you are bulking, we don’t judge).
A Word on Eating Red Meat

It is wildly in vogue for lifters to solely consume chicken and tuna for their meat
choices when dieting. Frankly, this is stupid. First, both of those taste like shit,
and tuna is about the worst smelling thing you could consume. And if you’re
one of those people who thinks they’re cool for violating office code and eating
that hot trash inside a confined space can rest assured your coworkers will kill
you first if they ever have an opportunity. In the past, I’ve informed coworkers
that the next time they bring fish in for lunch they will finish their meal in the
hospital. You might as well just shit on all of your coworkers’ desks, while
you’re at it, if you’re going to eat fish inside of a closed space. Seriously, if
you’re going to be that kind of monster, just go whole hog, because you might as
well earn the ass whipping that you have coming.
Beyond the superior taste, smell, and flavor of red meat, there are other reasons
to make it the staple of your diet- an essential fatty acid called arachidonic acid.
This badass sounding EFA actually increases protein turnover and synthesis. For
the slow kids, that means that you can build more muscle while bulking with red
meat and maintain the muscle you have even while on a brutal calorically
restrictive diet with the stuff.
Red meat also contains highly anabolic saturated fat, but before you start
whining about your cholesterol, it also is jam packed with stearic acid, which
will actually help prevent and reverse atherosclerosis.
And while we’re at it, stop wasting your money on filet- it’s tasteless trash that
they serve in expensive restaurants only because it’s finished with a quarter
pound of butter. Otherwise, it’d be the briquette you actually ordered. Fattier
cuts of steak like ribeye and porterhouse taste far better, and bone in meats
impart even more flavor as the marrow leeches out in the cooking process, and
studies have shown that eating meat on the bone increase aggression.
Furthermore, a 2010 paper published in the Frontiers of Neuroscience showed

that the tastiest foods are those that are high in calories and fat content. Not
only that, but the fat content increases taste, smell, and mouthfeel of food…
which means the fattier cuts of steak are the tastier cuts.
The Basics
Better Brisket Than Most Restaurants (Without Using Brisket or a
Smoker)
I know the title sounds impossible, but I am a man who loves brisket more than I
love just about anything else on the planet not living in my house. That said, I
don’t always have access to a smoker or cheap brisket (it used to be $5 a pound,
but hipsters have driven the price through the fucking roof). As such, I have
figured out how to make banging brisket using any flat cut of beef and an oven.
I typically use a boneless chuck roast, and it comes out better than most of the
brisket I’ve had in restaurants of late. Goddamned hipsters and their trash bbq.
● 4-5lb boneless chuck roast, brisket, flank, or any flat cut

● Liquid Smoke
● Coarse sea salt
● Coarse ground pepper
● Yellow mustard
● BBQ sauce of your choice (I use Stubbs) <- this is optional if
you’re eating keto. Don’t even bother with Walden Farms bbq
sauce- it’s a goddamn dumpster fire.
● ½ cup Olive oil
● ½ cup Apple Cider Vinegar
1. Dry off the brisket, then shake some liquid smoke onto it. You’ll have to
experiment with it- too much gives me the shits. Maybe ten squirts per side
should do it. Rub that in and let it sit a few mins.
2. Rub down with yellow mustard on both sides. Then liberally salt, and I
mean liberally- it’s hard to over salt brisket. Finally, coast that motherfucker
in pepper. There should be no part of that brisket uncoated in salt and pepper.
The pepper forms the badass crust you want on a brisket.
3. Let all of that sit at least an hour, or cover with plastic wrap and leave it
overnight, so all of the flavors can soak in. When ready, place it in a deep
baking pan like you’d use for a turkey or a roast and preheat the oven to 225.
Pop that fucker in as soon as the oven in ready. Set the timer to ten hours.
4. We’re not tenting or any of that happy horseshit- that kills the bark. What
you will want to do about every hour or two is splash the mixture of apple
cider vinegar and olive oil over the meat. I use a magic bullet to ensure the
two mix, because stirring them doesn’t do the trick- you really need to blend
it. The mixture will help make the meat more tender and juicier, so don’t
forget this part.
5. At 10 hours, pull it out and slather your bbq sauce over the top. Crank the
temp up to 425 and cook it for another half hour to caramelize the sauce a bit.
After 30 mins, it’s done. Let it cool for an hour for ideal results... though I
rarely do that, because smelling a brisket for 10 hours is heavenly torture, and
I am slavering by the time that bell dings.
Mamma Chaos’ Meatballs
This is one of many recipes I (Tara) have learned from watching my mom. Little
does she know I am stealing all her good recipes and making a profit off them...
● 2 lbs meatball mix (Beef, veal, pork)

● 2 cloves garlic, minced or a palmful of granulated garlic
● 2 eggs
● 1 cup Parmesan cheese
● 2 handfuls of parsley
● 1 palmful of Italian Seasoning
● salt and ground black pepper to taste
● 2 cups Italian breadcrumbs
● 1 1/2 cups milk
Preheat oven to 350. Mix everything together with your hands (make sure you
wash them, and take any jewelry off, you filthy twat) in a large bowl. Roll about
2 tablespoons worth of mixture, you can eyeball it, into a ball and place it on a
high sided cookie sheet. Bake for 20-25 min.
Tara’s Oven Roasted Chicken
This is a high heat method I found in a cookbook I inherited from my late

grandmother, and now have memorized. The high heat makes the skin extra
crispy, and tan.
Preheat oven to 450 degrees F (230 degrees C) and cook whole (thawed) chicken
for 10-15 minutes.
Then reduce the temperature to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C) and roast for 20
minutes per pound. (Note, I subtract the initial 15 min from the cooking time,
which I find gives me a better finish.)
Mamma Chaos (Almost) Competition Winning Chili
Almost 10 years ago, a few years after my parents moved to Texas, my mom got
entered in a city wide chili cook off. Much to everyone’s surprise, my Irish-
Italian, northern-born mother took 2nd place. She was told by the judges the
only reason she didn’t take first was: “Texans don’t put beans in their chili”.
● Oil
● 1 lb ground round
● 1 medium onion, chopped
● 2 stalks celery with leaves, chopped
● 1 green bell pepper, chopped
● 2 – 3 garlic cloves
● 1 chicken bouillon cube
● 15oz can diced tomatoes
● 15oz can dark red kidney beans (don’t drain)
● 15oz can black beans (don’t drain)
● 1 – 2 tablespoons (tbsp) chili powder
● 1 tbsp ground cumin
● Ground black pepper
● Sprinkle of hot pepper flakes
● Water to rinse cans
Brown beef with vegetables; add spices, beans and water to cover. Simmer
covered, then uncovered to evaporate water to desired thickness.
Tara’s Tacos (without the Envelope)
This is another recipe that I learned from watching my mom, and so these
instructions are approximates.
● Drizzle of oil
● 1 pound lean ground beef
● 1 medium onion finely chopped
● 1 tablespoon chili powder
● 1/4 teaspoon garlic powder
● 1/4 teaspoon onion powder
● 1/4 teaspoon crushed red pepper flakes optional
● 1/4 teaspoon dried oregano
● 1 teaspoon ground cumin
● 1 teaspoon salt
● 1/2 teaspoon pepper
● 1 14 ounce can crushed tomatoes drained
1. Heat the oil in a large pan over medium high heat.
2. Add the ground beef and break up with a spatula.

3. Add the onion to the pan.
4. Cook, stirring occasionally, until beef is done and onion is soft, 5-6
minutes. Drain off any excess fat.
5. Add the chili powder, garlic powder, onion powder, red pepper flakes,
oregano, cumin, salt and pepper to the pan. Stir to coat the meat in the
seasonings.
6. Add the tomatoes to the pan and simmer for 2-3 minutes.
The Easiest Portable Gainz in History- Mexican Beef, Beans, and

Rice
Not all of our recipes are easy to prep and portion. This one, however, is the
easiest goddamned thing in history to make. All you need is a hot plate, a pan,
and a pot- you can do this with no problem in a dorm room.
Substitute ground chicken or turkey, if you want. It makes no difference to me.
Taco Bell Taco Seasoning (or whatever taco seasoning you prefer)
Ground meat
Zatarain's Mexican Rice with Whole Pinto Beans Rice

Use one pound of ground meat (80% lean if you want to save money, then drain
and rinse the meat to get it about as lean as chicken breast) per box of Zatarain's
Mexican Rice with Whole Pinto Beans Rice.
Research from at Iowa State University in 2002 found that 4 ounces of 80% lean
ground beef that was pan-fried, drained, blotted with paper towels and
rinsed with hot water contained 121 calories and 5 grams of fat—roughly
the equivalent of 95% lean beef.
Follow the taco seasoning direction to make taco meat and follow the directions
for the rice and beans mix. Once both are done, combine in a large bowl and
mix thoroughly. This is best if you let it sit overnight so the flavors can
combine.
Each box/pound combo, if split into thirds, will give you three servings of 57
grams of carbs, 35 grams of protein, and 9 grams of fat. Tinker with that
however you want, but it’s cheap and easy as hell to make gains with that
combo.
The Fat Kid Meals
Jamie’s Butter Chicken
Take the “Basic Garlic-Herb Butter” and rub it inside the cavity of the chicken,
slide it under the skin, and rub the exterior of the skin with it as well.
Roast per “Tara’s Oven Roasted Chicken”, or put it on a rotisserie.
Sausage Gravy That Will Get You Laid
True story, half the reason I stayed together with Jamie in the beginning (we
were damn near 2 hours apart, and the drive to work was brutal) was he made
this EVERY weekend. I had tried sausage gravy down south, and I was nothing
close to a fan. It was gross, chunky, tasteless white crap ruining a perfectly good
biscuit. This stuff is the best sausage gravy I have ever tasted, and we may be
known to put it on chicken fried steak as well.
You could put this shit on a flip flop and eat it, as Guy Fieri would say. It’s that
good. Be forewarned- this is bulking food, and nothing but. Don’t even bother
trying to use low fat shit, because it’s straight trash like that.
● 1 pound sage pork breakfast sausage (USE THE SAGE STUFF, or
season the shit out of it. Sage is key here)
● 3 tbsp butter
● 1 tsp of sage (the extra sage is nice)
● 1 tsp pepper
● 1 tsp red chili pepper flakes (if you want it a little spicy. Tara is a
pussy about spicy food so I just dump it on as I eat it)
● 1 tbsp powdered garlic
● 1/4 cup all-purpose flour
● 3 cups Fairlife whole milk (might as well get the extra protein)
1. Brown the sausage in a large skillet. I chop it fine as it’s cooking, but you
might like bigger crumbles. It’s your call. Drain about half of the oil- there
should still be a spoonful or so in there, and then add the utter and stir that in
until it’s melted.
2. Sprinkle sausage with flour, pepper, sage, and garlic, stir, and cook it dry
for a couple of minutes. Then gradually stir in the milk. Don’t just dump it
in- gradually add it. Trust me.
3. Add the milk and stir. Continue stirring occasionally over medium heat
until gravy thickens, 5-10 minutes.
4. This is critical- do not salt it at all until it’s already thickened . If you
add salt as it’s cooking, you will end up throwing it in the trash. Add a little
salt at the end if it needs it.
5. Save yourself the hassle and just throw that on top of Pillsbury southern
biscuits or something. I make drop biscuits all the time using Bisquick,
which are easy as all hell. If you do those, just follow the directions on the
box- they take maybe 10 minutes from opening the box to taking them out of
the oven.
Tara’s more Bacon than Potato Soup
Ahhhhhh... There are few things I love more than good Potato Soup
(Hmmmm?!? Beer, cigarettes, hot guys in uniform, hot guys who aren't in
uniform, hard cider, good books, ok, maybe there are a lot of things I love more
than potato soup but anyhow... the story isn't as good without that beginning).
This is the first recipe I ever did by just winging it.
● A side of bacon
● 2 leeks
● a couple cloves of garlic
● 3-4 boxes of chicken stock
● 2 onions
● 5 lbs of potatoes
● Salt & pepper to taste
1. Cut up the bacon. I do it while it is still frozen because it is easier to cut,

but if your knife skills suck, PLEASE DO NOT DO THIS! You will lose a
finger.
2. Put the sliced bacon aside for safe keeping. (You know... In case you get
mugged by a crazed bacon loving gunman.)
3. Wash your leeks, cut the roots and the woody ends off them. Split them in
half (again... BE CAREFUL!), chop them, put them in a colander, then put
that colander in a sink of cold water to rinse all the sand out of the leeks.
While you are doing this have your stock pot heating...
4. Start cooking the bacon. (Yes, I know... this is an amazing thought, you
wouldn't consume frozen raw bacon.) Don't have the heat up too hot, burned
bacon is not what we are looking for this.
5. While the bacon is filling your house with all its bacon-ey goodness, chop
or grate the garlic. I prefer mine grated, but I am high maintenance.
6. HEY! Did you forget about your leeks that were chilling in the cold water?
Pull them out and let them drain.
7. Still keeping an eye on your bacon, dice your onions and if your bacon is
done drain off about half the fat.
8. Sauté the onion and garlic until pretty soft (Yup... Highly technical terms
there).
9. Add the leeks. Stir, then cover for a minute or 2.

10. Scrape all the yummy brown stuff off the bottom of the pan, and turn the
heat down to low and re-cover.
11. Clean your potatoes really well, then peel them. I usually leave a spiral of
skin. It gives a better texture to the soup.
12. Dice the potatoes, and add them to the cooked down leek, onion, garlic,
bacon mixture. Stir well as you are adding the potatoes. Add 2 or so boxes of
stock (I go about an inch above the potatoes), then simmer the potatoes until
they are tender.
13. Once the potatoes are done, bust out your blender (I am not cool enough
to have an immersion blender.) CAREFULLY fill the carafe about half full
with everything (solid & liquid).
14. Blend, empty into a bowl, repeat. If you have to add extra stock (hence all
the extra boxes, DUH!), do so slowly and carefully through the little hole on
the blender lid. Try not to over-blend. It's supposed to be slightly chunky.
15. I take a potato masher to the last quarter of the soup so it is super chunky
(that's how I like my peanut butter too), pour the remainder into the bowl, salt
& pepper it to taste and mix.
Baked Mac and Cheese
I have made this with ham and broccoli instead of the pasta, so it is keto-ish. I
also will mix in peas and ham, or cooked bacon before I bake it.
● 1/2 pound short pasta

● 3 tablespoons butter
● 3 tablespoons flour
● 3 cups milk
● 12 ounces extra sharp cheddar, shredded
● 1 teaspoon salt
● Black pepper to taste
1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.
2. Cook pasta to al dente in salted boiling water
3. While the pasta is cooking, in a separate pot, melt the butter. Whisk in the
flour, stirring for about five minutes. Make sure it's free of lumps. Stir in the
milk. Simmer for ten minutes.
4. Stir in the cheese. Season with salt and pepper.
5. Mix the macaroni into the cheese and pour into a 2-quart casserole dish.
Top with remaining cheese.
6. Top the macaroni with bread crumbs, if desired
7. Bake for 30 minutes. Remove from oven and rest for five minutes before
serving.
Hypertrophic Coney Island Hot Dogs
The Greek Sauce
● 1 lb ground beef (if you're fat boy bulking you can go 80%, but I'd
use 85% or 90% to keep it from being way to greasy)
● 2 cups water
● 1⁄4 tsp black pepper
● 2 tsp dried onion flakes
● 1⁄2 tsp cayenne pepper
● 1 tsp oregano
● 1 tbsp paprika
● 2 tsp chili powder
● 2 tsp cumin
● 1⁄2 tsp ground cloves
● 1 tsp salt
This one is a little different than you might be used to, because you don't pre-
brown the meat. You literally dump everything into the pan and make a paste of
it before you even heat it. You then bring it to a boil, stirring regularly, and then
simmer for an hour.
The Dogs and the Buns

If you’re eating keto, obviously go bunless and get a fatty dog made however
you like it, though I would recommend nitrate-free. If you’re eating clean,
definitely head to Trader Joe’s and get their Uncured Chicken Hot Dogs… and
just eat the fucking thing on white bread. Wheat buns suck.
Isocaloric (If you want) Spaghetti Pie
This is a midwestern favorite that I tinkered with to make Plague of Strength

Style-Isocaloric (40% protein, 30% carbs, 30% fat). You can play with it to
make it everything from keto to bulking if you want. I am all about options.
● 1 package protein enriched spaghetti
● 2 lbs 90% lean ground beef
● 1 small onion, chopped or minced
● 5 tbsp minced garlic
● 1.5 jars (22 ounces) spaghetti sauce (low sugar shit. Nothing like
Ragu)
● 1/2 teaspoon salt
● 1/4 teaspoon pepper
● 3 ounces reduced-fat cream cheese
● 1 cup sour cream
● 3 green onions, chopped
● 1-1/2 cups -shredded mozzarella cheese
● 1/2 cup parmesan (topping)
1. Cook spaghetti according to package directions; drain.
2. While that's going, fry up the beef. I sauté the garlic and onion first, then
add the beef, but if that's beyond your skills just throw it all in together, chop
up the beef as you cook it, and brown it. It should take around 10 mins with
two pounds of meat. Drain the fat if you want, though with 90% there won't
be much and you'll lose the garlic and onion flavor. If you're using fattier
meat and plan to drain it, brown the garlic and onion separately.
3. Stir in the spaghetti sauce, salt and pepper; bring to a boil. Reduce heat;
simmer, uncovered, for 20 minutes, stirring occasionally.
4. In a small bowl, mix cream cheese and sour cream until blended; stir in
green onions. In a greased 11x7-in. baking dish, layer the spaghetti, cream
cheese mixture and meat mixture. Top with shredded cheese, then dust that
bitch with the parmesan, but there's no need to measure it out- just do it to
taste.
5. Bake, covered, at 350° for 25 minutes. Uncover; bake until cheese is

bubbly, 5-10 minutes longer.
Lazy ass meal prep, Keto(ish)
Keto Chicken Tenders
These are a close personal favorite, because as I have mentioned, I eat like a 5
year old most days. This is caused in part to the fact that while I have an
incredible sense of smell, I have lost a portion of my sense of taste, due to one of
the medicines I take. Strange but true. And fat actually increases how things
taste to humans (see the section on Red Meat).
● 1 lb Chicken Breast Tenders

● 1/2 cup Almond Flour
● 1 cup grated parmesan cheese
● 1 large Egg
● 1 tbsp Fairlife milk
● Salt and Pepper
● Garlic powder, Italian Herbs, Chili powder (etc)
1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
2. Season chicken tenders with salt and pepper. Mix almond flour and grated
cheese in a ziplock bag. Season the almond flour/cheese mixture generously
with salt and pepper.
3. Beat 1 egg together with milk.
4. Dip each tender first in the egg wash and then into the seasoned almond
flour until they are well coated.
5. Place tenders on a lightly greased baking sheet, and then lightly spray the
tenders with cooking spray.
6. Bake for 30 minutes flipping once.. If they are not as crispy as you would
like you can additionally broil them for 2-3 minutes.
Tara’s Bone Broth
Bone Broth. The single easiest and most difficult thing to make outside of
omelettes. Ok, not really. Bone broth is extremely easy to make. This is just my
version of it, which is based off Idna Gartner’s broth recipe. Jamie and I keep a
ziplock bag in the freezer for bones. Yes, that includes the ones in the food we
eat (ie spare ribs) and bones I have de-boned out of assorted pieces of meat. I
honestly don’t recommend something like ox tails because it is a waste of meat,
and they are super expensive now a days. In addition to a bone bag, I keep a
scraps bag for onion tops, carrot ends, celery tops and centers, and parsley that
has wilted. That’s generally what I use in my bone broth, but I know that is a bit
weird, so I tried to give you approximates in non-“recycled” veggies.
● 2-3 lbs of assorted bones (should be enough to cover the bottom of

a large roasting pan)
● 2 medium Onions, halved
● The tops of a bunch of Carrots, a couple handfuls of baby carrots,
or 3 carrots broken in half
● The top 3 inches of a Celery bunch, or the top and center
trimmings, leaves especially
● 5 cloves of garlic
● 2 dried red chili peppers (more or less to taste)
● 2 tbsp of whole peppercorns
● 3 tbsp of crystal salt (I love Celtic Sea Salt)
● 1 bunch of Parsley, plus whatever herbs you like
● 1/2 lemon rind
● 4 cups water (for pan after roasting)
● Water to fill crock pot
1. Preheat the oven to 450. Arrange the bones on the bottom of a roasting pan,
and then spread the rest of the ingredients (aside from the water) on top of the
bones. Put the pan in the oven for 30-45 minutes, occasionally mixing the
ingredients around.
2. When the bones are golden brown and fragrant (yes, you will be able to
smell them), empty the contents of the roasting pan into your crock pot. Put
the roasting pan on the stove, crank the burners to high, and when the pan is
hot, use the 4 cups of water to deglaze the pan. Pour the pan water into the
crockpot and then add water pretty much to the top.
3. Set it and forget it, on high for like 8 hours. When it is done, strain out all
the stuff, leaving the broth.
Tara’s Lazyass Crockpot Buffalo Chicken
● 1-1.5 lbs Chicken Breast, Salt and Peppered

● Half a stick of butter
● 2 tablespoons minced garlic
● Half a bottle of Frank’s Red Hot or similar sauce.
Put the butter and garlic into the crockpot, then the chicken, and then douce
everything with the hot sauce. Put the lid on, and set it on low for 4-6 hours.
When the chicken pulls easily, turn it off and shred it in the liquid.
One Pan Oh Fuck! Keto Chicken and Sausage Bake
● 1.5 lbs Chicken Thighs

● 2 lbs Italian Sausage
● Seasoning to taste, I generally use Pink Salt, black pepper and a
fuckload of garlic
1. Preheat your oven to 400 degrees F, and get an oven safe high sided pan on
the stove. Crank that puppy to high so it gets scorching hot. While your pan is
heating, season the skin side of the chicken thighs.
2. Place the thighs skin side down in the pan, turn the heat to Medium High
and cook for 5-7 minutes. You want the skin brown and crispy, not black and
charred so you probably will need to check one or two of them during that
time.
3. Flip them over let them cook for a minute or 2, and place your sausage on
top of them.
4. Place your pan in the oven for 25 minutes.

5. After 25 min check the sausage for doneness. if it isn’t done, throw it in the
oven for another 5-10 min.
6. If the sausage IS done, remove it from the pan, and put the pan back in the
oven for another 15 minutes, or until the thighs are fully cooked.
7. Put aside the juice in the pan to boost chicken stock or bone broth.
Jamie’s Go To: Steak and Chimi
In my mind, it gets no better than this combination, and I pretty much live on
steak sandwiches. They’re quick to make, they’re intensely satisfying, and they
keep me growing.
The Chimi
Green chimichurri is the condiment and marinade typically used in Argentine

cooking, though each color provides its own unique flavor. Thus, you might as
well make both, because they're both fucking amazing and you'll just sit
wondering why you didn't if you make one and not the other.
● 1 bunch flat leaf parsley

● 10 cloves garlic, chopped super finely
● 1/2-3/4 cup extra virgin olive oil (I use a half cup because I prefer
my chimichurri thicker. Try both.)
● 1/4 cup red wine vinegar
● Juice from half a lemon or lime
● A couple tbsp of rosemary (fresh if possible)
● 1/2 cup fresh oregano leaves (you can substitute dried if that’s all
you have)
● red pepper flakes or chopped guajillo chili for a smoky flavor (I
prefer everything spicy, but the chilis are completely optional)
● 1 teaspoon black pepper
Pulse parsley in processor to chop. Add remaining ingredients and blend. You
can pulse it as much or as little as you like to achieve your desired consistency
though- every person in South America likely makes different chimi than their
neighbor.
Red Chimichurri is similar in flavor, but a little smokier in flavor. Both are
bangin’, and if you have the adobo chilies handy, you might as well toss em in
● 1 cup finely chopped fresh flat-leaf parsley

● 1/2 cup extra-virgin olive oil
● 1/4 cup red wine vinegar
● Juice of half a lime or lemon
● 2 tbsp finely chopped fresh oregano
● 1 tbsp spoon pureed chipotle in adobo
● 1 tbsp smoked paprika
● 1 tsp crushed red pepper flakes
● 4 cloves garlic, finely chopped (I typically go ham on the garlic
and use far more than this)
● Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper to taste
Same prep as above. Takes five minutes, and every one of those minutes is well
worth it.
The Steak
Argentines cook everything over a smoky wood fire, so it's pretty difficult to
replicate their techniques without an awesome grill. I simply use an oiled grill
plate from Ikea on the stove, which produces pretty fucking awesome results
once the plate is well seasoned.,
Putting aside the method of cooking, which you can look up if you're some kind
of grill master and aren't currently snowed inside, here's a good way to prepare
and season your steak. The cornstarch and salt mixture, followed by the par-
freezing will get your meat to brown nicely and quickly on the outside, which
means your steaks will be super juicy when they come off the grill.
This prep method works fucking wonders for steak sandwiches as well, if you
happen to be eating carbs. Just slice the steak against the grain, top with
chimichurri, onions, and tomatoes, and pop that shit onto a crusty baguette (or
my new fave, bolillo rolls, which you can get almost for free at Walmart, and
you're in business.
● 1 tablespoon cornstarch
● 2 tablespoons sea salt
● 4 lbs of steak (dealer’s choice on this- I go with whatever is on
sale, but I refuse to eat round unless it’s marinanded and I generally
only use that for tacos)
● Ground black pepper
Combine cornstarch and salt in small bowl. Pat steaks dry with paper towels,
then rub steaks in their entirety with cornstarch/salt mixture. Pop those bad boys
onto wire racks and toss the whole shitteree, uncovered, in the freezer for about
30 minutes. Frankly, you can just let the damn things rest on the counter for 30
mins- you just want the salt to soak in a bit.
Grill those bad boys. If you don't know how to grill shit, look it up. This isn't
cooking kindergarten.
After you let the meat rest (remember to pull the meat a little early, because it
continues cooking on the plate or cutting board until you start cutting)., top with
as much chimichurri as you want.
Crockpot Carnitas
● 1 pork shoulder, deboned - cut into 2” chunks
● 1 cinnamon stick
● 1 Large orange, juice and skin
● 3 tablespoons cumin
● Salt and Pepper
● 3 bay leaves
● Oil
Put chunked pork shoulder, cinnamon stick, orange juice and skin, cumin, salt
and pepper, and bay leaves into crock pot. Be sure to pack it down. Cover with
oil. It should be enough oil to submerge the meat. Cook on low for 8 hours.
Check to see if the chunks pull apart easily. If it doesn’t keep cooking it. Drain
off liquid (you can save it for the next time you make it), shred the pork and
enjoy.
Chicken Asparagus Packages
● 1 large pack of skinless, deboned chicken thighs, seasoned to taste.

● 1 pack of bacon
● 1 bundle of asparagus.
1. Preheat the oven to 400.
2. Cut off the woody ends of the asparagus and give them a good wash.
3. Cut the bacon in half, and check that you have twice as many strips of
bacon as you have chicken thighs.
4. Cut the asparagus to fit in the chicken thigh, and bundle a couple spears
inside each thigh.
5. Wrap each one tightly with 2 pieces of bacon.

6. Bake for 20-25 min.
Egg Cupcakes
● 6 eggs
● 6 ounces cooked breakfast meat, crumbled
● 1 cup diced vegetables (I love it with peppers)
● 1 cup diced onion (if desired)
● 1/8 teaspoon ground black pepper
● 2 tablespoons milk
1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.

2. Grease 6 muffin cups
3. Beat eggs together in a large bowl.
4. Mix meat, vegetables, onion, salt, black pepper, and milk into the beaten
eggs.
5. Pour egg mixture evenly into prepared muffin cups.
6. Bake in the preheated oven until muffins are set in the middle, 18 to 20
minutes.
“Everyone Loves Bacon” Wrapped Chicken
Amounts vary on how much chicken vs bacon you want.
Preheat oven to 400. Place a rack onto a cookie sheet.

Get pre-cut chicken tenders, or cut them yourself. Sprinkle them with salt,
pepper and garlic. Take a strip of bacon, hold its end to the end of the tender and
spiral around the tender. Tuck both ends under the tender as you place it on the
rack.
Bake for 15 min or until an internal temperature of 165 degrees F is reached.
Parmesan Crunchies
Preheat oven to 400 F and place rack to middle position. Line a large baking
sheet with a silicone mat or parchment paper. Grate cheese into very fine
crumbles if you do not have grated Parmesan.
Measure the cheese by the teaspoonful and place onto the parchment lined pan.
Gently pat each mound of cheese into a circle with your finger (about 1 1/4 - 1
1/2 inches). Sprinkle any herbs, spices, or flavorings on before baking.
Bake the Parmesan crisps until they start to turn golden brown, 6 - 8 minutes.
Let cool completely before storing in an airtight container.
Lazy ass meal prep, Marinades
LT's Easy Ass Marinade
● 1/2 cup soy sauce or coconut aminos

● 1/2 cup sesame oil
● 1 pinch red chili flake (more to taste)
● 2 tablespoons squeeze ginger
● 2 tablespoons squeeze garlic
● 1 bunch finely cut scallions
● black pepper to taste
● 1 lb Protein (beef, pork or chicken)
Throw all of your ingredients into either a gallon ziplock bag, or a reusable
silicone storage bag (I personally LOVE the reusable bags, but the texture
skeeves Jamie out). Mix everything around and toss it in the fridge for a
minimum of 30 min, flipping at least once. Cook meat to taste.
Drunk Limey Bastard
● ¼ cup gold Tequila

● ¼ cup lime
● ½ cup oil
● 2 tablespoons squeeze cilantro (to taste)
● 2 tablespoons squeeze garlic
● Pinch red pepper flake (this is completely to taste)
● 1 tablespoon cumin (again, to taste)
● 1-2 lbs protein
● Salt and Pepper to taste
Mix everything in a gallon ziplock, and let it sit in the fridge for 30+ min
(overnight is best). Flip it, caress it, rub it down, at least once, then grill or broil
the protein to taste.
Jamie’s Go To Garlic - Parm Marinade
1.5lb steak (can be a shitty cut because the lime will tenderize it) rub it down
liberally with salt and pepper. 1tsp-2tsp of each, roughly. Pat the rub in,
then drop the steak into a ziplock bag
Also into the bag:

juice of one lime
1tbsp vegetable oil/olive oil/whatever oil. less if you're fat conscious, but it
affects the flavor of the steak if it's not a good cut.
Let that marinade overnight. Pull it out of the bag and dust a decent crust of
parmesan onto it, which should basically cover the steak, but you're not
looking for a 1/4" of the shit. Be reasonable. Just coat the damn steak on
both sides.
Whatever you're using to cook this, be it grill plate, a frying pan, or a grill, use
HIGH HEAT. heat is your friend, and that's how you get a nice char/crust
on the steak. Read a cookbook for cooking times if you don't know how to
sear a steak. I just by feel and the look of the meat, but you can also cut
into it to see where you stand.
Remember- steak keeps cooking on the cutting board until you slice it, so if you
wait until it's just a light pink in the middle, it's overcooked. Luckily, the
lime and oil will keep it tender and juicy unless you royally fuck this up.
Basic Garlic Herb Butter
● 1 stick butter 1/2 cup, softened

● 1 1/2 teaspoons lemon juice
● 1/2 teaspoon salt or to taste
● 1 clove garlic minced
● 3 tablespoons fresh parsley chopped
● 1 1/2 tablespoons fresh chopped herbs basil, oregano, rosemary etc
● 1/4 teaspoon black pepper
● Sprinkle of red pepper flake (optional)
Combine all ingredients in a bowl and mix until well combined. You can either
put this into a plastic container or, if you want to impress your friends and family
put it onto plastic wrap or waxed paper, and roll it into a tube.
Use Everywhere Marinade
This is based off my mom’s salad dressing recipe, and now I use it for
everything. I eyeball the SHIT out of this, so these are super rough measures.
● 2 tablespoons vinegar (whichever you like)

● 4 tablespoons olive oil
● 1 teaspoon garlic powder
● 1 teaspoon paprika
● 1 teaspoon onion powder
● 1 teaspoon black pepper
● ½ teaspoon salt
Mix everything in a gallon ziplock, and let it sit in the fridge for 30+ min
(overnight is best). Flip it, caress it, rub it down, at least once, then grill or broil
the protein to taste.
Lazy ass meal prep, Rotisserie Chicken Meals
Chicken-Broccoli Alfredo
● 1 package uncooked rotini pasta

● 1 (22 ounce) jar Alfredo sauce
● 3 cups chicken stock
● 3 cups diced rotisserie chicken or other diced cooked chicken
● 1 package frozen broccoli, thawed and drained
● 2 teaspoons minced garlic
1. Preheat oven to 425°F.
2. In a large baking dish, stir together uncooked pasta, alfredo sauce, chicken
stock, chicken, and garlic. Cover tightly with aluminum foil and bake for 30
minutes.
3. Uncover; stir. At this point you should check the pasta to make sure that it
is al dente (firm but just about finished cooking). Generally my pasta is done
in 30 min but it may take 10-15 min longer. If it’s still too hard after 30
minutes, just cover the dish and return to the oven until pasta is al dente.
Chicken Tortilla Soup
● 3 cups chicken breasts

● 1 15-oz. can black beans, rinsed
● 1 bag frozen corn
● 2 bell peppers, chopped
● 1 white onion, chopped
● 1 big can rotel tomatoes or salsa
● 2-3 tablespoons squeeze cilantro
● 2 tablespoons garlic, minced
● 1 tablespoon cumin
● 1 tablespoon chili powder
● 1 teaspoon salt
● 2 boxes low-sodium chicken broth
1. In a large slow cooker, combine chicken, black beans, corn, peppers, onion,
fire-roasted tomatoes, cilantro, garlic, cumin, chili powder, salt, and chicken
broth.
2. Cover and cook on low until chicken is cooked and falling apart, 2-3 hours.
3. Shred chicken with a fork, dig in.
Italian Wedding Soup
● 2 lbs Rotisserie Chicken off the bone

● 1 box mini farfalle (cooked separately)
● 1 steam in bag mixed veggies
● 3 Quarts Chicken broth
● 1 bag Turkey meatballs
● Garlic Powder/salt/pepper/Thyme to taste
1. Put everything but the pasta and veggies into a stock pot, heat until almost
boiling. Add the veg.
2. While that is cooking, prepare the pasta, toss it in oil in a separate container
and set aside.
3. Put pasta in your bowl, then add soup. Do not add all the pasta to the soup.
You will get mush after a day or so.
Spicy Baked Broccoli & chicken

● 1 ½ pounds broccoli florets (I use the bags of pre cut broccoli)
● 3 tablespoons olive oil
● ¼ teaspoon garlic powder
● ¼ teaspoon chili powder
● salt and pepper
● 2 breasts from the rotisserie chicken, rough chopped, tossed lightly
in oil and seasoned, and heated.
1. Preheat the oven to 450 degrees F. Line a large rimmed baking sheet with
parchment paper.
2. Trim the broccoli into small bite-size florets. Pile the florets onto the
baking sheet. Drizzle the oil over the top, then sprinkle with 1/4 teaspoon
garlic powder, 3/4 teaspoon salt, 1/2 teaspoon cracked black pepper. Toss to
coat well.
3. Spread the broccoli in a single layer over the baking sheet. Roast in oven
for approximately 15 minutes, then until the edges are slightly charred and
crispy.
4. Toss everything together and enjoy.

Before You Buy a Weight Gainer,
Behold the Bulking Shakes of the
Golden Age of Bodybuilding
There is no bigger, Santa Claus-sized back of baby back bullshit than the
commercial weight gain shake in the supplement industry. Commercial weight
gainers are nothing more than overpriced whey mixed with sugar, and all that is
going to get you is fat and bloated enough that you'll look like you're prepping to
star in Medea's Family Gets Diabetes Again . For those of you who want to pack
on the mass without resorting to overpaying for a sugar-filled drink or eating
McDonald's and hot dogs all the live-long day, my interest in 1950's and 60's
strength training luminaries has produced an answer- old school weight gain
protein shake recipes. These recipes will be off-putting at first to a great many
of you due to their insanely high calories and fat content, but hang in there ,
because there is a very thoughtful method to the weight gaining madness of
Golden Age of bodybuilding and prehistoric era of powerlifting.
The recipes of this era focus on a caloric balance between fat and protein, which
protein powder pioneer Rheo H. Blair considered essential. Blair was the first
real phenom in the supplement industry, using himself and other test subjects for
experimental trials training in his state-of-the-art facility and protein
meal/shake. Blair himself referred to it as protein pudding due to its thickness,
and his own progress in the gym and testimonials from his trial subjects set the
lifting world afire like a seaman's dick after shore leave in the Philippines.
US Olympic weightlifting sponsor and bodybuilding magazine owner Bob
Hoffman and others followed right on Blair's heels with protein shakes of their
own, but where Blair's drink was a surprisingly modern and tasty milk and egg
blend, the rest of the proteins on the market were foul tasting, man titty
bestowing soy. Nevertheless, everyone in the lifting scene started chugging
shakes and swore up and down by them. Everyone from legendary weightlifter
Paul Anderson to bodybuilding phenom Don Howorth to Yoda-esque
bodybuilding trainer Vince Gironda to Bruce Lee were downing shakes like
Japanese weirdos eating the ass cheeks off of Dutch students, and all of them
credited the shakes with helping them pack on mass and build strength.
No matter which powder was being being used, the consensus was that protein
shakes should be calorie dense as a goddamn neutron star and made with either
store-bought half and half or (preferably) a homemade mix of half cream and
half milk. As Rheo H. Blair said himself,
"The preferred liquid for mixing the protein is half-and-half, and for a
good reason. Nature seems to indicate that protein and fat should be taken
in even balance. Milk with 3% protein is balanced with an equal amount of
fat. Likewise eggs, meat, etc."
"By mixing the protein [powder] with half whole milk and half heavy
cream, we restore some of the fat removed during processing, and we
achieve a product more normally balanced as to proportions of protein and
fat … One may use the protein in pure cream, with no milk at all!”

I'll admit that when I read this when coming up I was beyond dubious, having
been raised in the fat-phobic 1980's and 1990's and weaned on bodybuilding
mags touting the tired-ass and ultimately counterproductive chicken
breast/broccoli/rice diet that was all the rage in those days. As such, I used a
small amount of skim milk and left a lot of gains on the table. in the years when i
was keto I left even more gains on the table by failing to sacrifice a little in the
way of carbs for gaining the anabolic benefit of half and half, so I continued
screwing up. Now that I'm older and wiser, I'm using half and half and 2% in my
shakes and growing like never before. I'm generally loathe to give this kind of
personal anecdote, but I am trying to impart the full seriousness of this issue.
And if my personal experience is uncompelling, consider the following:
● Lower fat diets are not nearly as anabolic as moderate to high fat diets
because a reduction in dietary fat invariably leads to a decrease in
androstenedione, testosterone and free testosterone (Hämäläinen).
● Increasing the dietary fat intake of athletes to 42% has a crazy effect on
both your immune system and your exercise endurance. You'll spend less
time sick and a hell of a lot more time in the gym or pushing the sled,
because it "improves endurance exercise performance at 60-80% of
VO2max in cyclists, soldiers, and runners" (Venkatraman).
● Diets with insufficient fat and protein fully fuck strength athletes and
heavy weight trainers, because that kind of diet destroys your serum T and
free testosterone (Sallinen).
Finally, Vince Gironda himself had this to add:
"A word to those who do not understand cholesterol: Exercise is the very
best fat emulsifier known, because man still reacts to stress (which is the
primary cause of cholesterol overproduction) as he did when in a primitive
state. Cholesterol calls for action (Fight or Flight). Cholesterol prepares
you in case of injury (stops bleeding if you are cut, or protects a rupture of
veins). Also, a little known fact is that the body manufactures more
cholesterol that you can possibly eat. The body reduces cholesterol output
- or produces more - depending on how much of it you ingest. Fats and oils
are fat emulsifiers themselves (lepotropics). So, who started the
misconception that fats and oils cause unnatural cholesterol levels? As a
matter of fact, if you study this problem you will find it is a substance
known as triglyceride that is the culprit.”
As to consuming them, Blair was surprisingly adamant that his protein shakes be
sipped or slowly eaten as pudding- never, ever chugged. This is an anathema to
me- I would no sooner sip a protein shake than I would a shot of tequila. The
entire idea seems weirdly perverse, yet guys in the 60's and 70's swore up and
down that this method was the way to go. According to Blair,
"The way you get this protein mixture into the stomach is important.
Mistakes at this point can spell disappointing results. The protein drink is
never to be gulped. It is to be sipped slowly. Some persons should take at
least 30 minutes to get the glassful swallowed.
The same goes for milk, which ought always to be sipped slowly, taking
fifteen minutes to sip a glassful. To make it easier, use a straw and pinch
the end together. This puts milk into the stomach at the same rate a baby
does, and that is the best way.
Now, we don't suggest sitting and looking at the drink for thirty minutes!
Sip it slowly while you keep busy at other things like getting ready in the
morning, working, studying, working out, etc.
You might do as Don Howorth does. First thing in the morning he would
mix or pour the protein drink and start sipping. Then he'd shower and sip
some more. After shaving, some more. After thirty minutes or so he's
ready to sip the last and start the day's work.
This slow sipping is important. Many people I meet do not have the ability
to digest foods as efficiently or to metabolize them as readily as they
should. Putting foods into the stomach slowly helps to handle them more
efficiently."
It likely won't come as a shock that of the 1973 Gold's Gym competitors, Arnold, Franco, Ken Waller, and
Ric Drasin were all huge proponents of Rheo Blair's supplements and methods.
Source: HuffPost
Having explained the whys and the wherefores of these badass bulking shakes,
here are a couple of old school recipes you can use to pack on some mass and
start moving some weight.
Blair's Creamy Delicious
● 1 cup light cream
● 1 cup lowfat milk

● 3 scoops of protein powder
● 1 tablespoon vanilla extract
● 2 eggs (drop in boiling water 30 seconds)

Blair's Light Creamy
● 1 cup half and half (8 ounces)
● 1 cup whole milk


Blair's Yogurt Delight

● 3 ounces half and half
● 1 cup plain yogurt

● 12 ounces of 2% milk

Blair's California Coconut Delight

● 4 ounces of light cream
● 12 ounces of 2% lowfat milk
● 2 tablespoons coconut extract
● 1 egg boiled for 30 seconds
Blair suggested that you "freeze these recipes in an ice cream freezer or divide
into individual portions in cups and place in the freezer. Before eating thaw the
ice cream slightly. You can also use different extracts like almond, black walnut
and others. You can also try using fruit like strawberries, peaches, pineapple. For
juices you may add some carrot juice" (Blair). the key, however, was to
consume them slowly, which I doubt many of us have ever tried.
Vince Gironda's Hormone Precursor Shake
Vince recommended having three of these a day, so you can rest assured no one
was going hungry on his diet. The first shake served as breakfast, then the other
two were sipped on during lunch and in the evening.
● 12oz half and half (milk consisting of light and heavy cream)
● 12 raw eggs
● 1 banana (for taste, can be omitted if strict low carb)

Bob Hoffman's Hi-Proteen Shake
Hoffman seems not to have given specific recommendations for his soy protein
powder (Hi-Proteen), but he did make a list of "some of the foods that mix
together well as a milk shake" (Hoffman 114). His protein apparently tasted like
pureed, burnt dog assholes (and his later release of fish protein powder was
apparently even worse) no matter which of five flavors you used, so I would
guess that this recipe was as much to mask the horrific taste of soy as it was to
provide nutrition. In any event, the US Olympic weightlifting team at the time
served as his test subjects and as some of the biggest consumers of the stuff, and
they were fucking beasts, so it must've had some positive effect. Because he
failed to provide any portion control, I'm just kind of winging it with the recipe-
the ingredients are his, but I filled in the blanks on the amounts. If anyone's got
an actual full-blown recipe, hit me up.
● 2 scoops protein powder

● 2 cups whole milk
● 2 cups skim milk
● 1 tbsp peanut or almond butter
● 1/4 cup chocolate syrup
● 1 banana
● 1 whole egg
● 1 tbsp honey
● (optional) quarter brick of chocolate ice cream
McCallum's Get Big Drink
While Bob Hoffman was the 20th Century's predecessor of the modern day
giant-behind-the-keyboard who populates electronic dumpster fires like 4Chan,
believing he was far more capable and impressive than he was and telling
everyone stories that might s well have been printed in cowshit on used toilet
paper, he had nothing but the highest praise for John McCallum's "Get Big
Drink." Hoffman included it in a hell of a lot of articles and recommended that
all of his athletes at York use it, which is insanely high praise.
● 6-8 scoops of protein
● 2 quarts of whole milk
● 2 cups of dry skim milk
● 2 eggs
● 4 tablespoons peanut butter
● Half a brick (.875 quarts or 462 grams) of chocolate ice cream
● 1 small banana
● 4 tablespoons malted milk powder
● 6 tablespoons of corn syrup
So there you have it- all of the nutritional WMDs a growing boy or girl could
need to smash through plateaus and pack on mass like you're Christian Bale after
The Machinist . If you decide to pass on these because you're afraid of getting
fat, just know I'll be there to verbally bitch slap you when you come whining
about how you're gonna reset to the bar because of butt wink and some other
stupid bullshit and the internet supports your decision to remain weak but you
want to send me form check videos anyway. Don't involve me in that bullshit-
just stop being a little bitch, eat up, and move weights.
Life's too short to be small, and it's far too short to be weak.

365 Dob

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365 Days of Brutality by Jamie Lewis

Cover by Tara Chaos

This is for all those who supported the

Plague of Strength would like to acknowledge the following people, because

“Work hard, play hard. And whatever you

That’s right- this is an anti-programming manifesto . If you shelve this book

“We’re the anti-influencer influencers,” said badass gourmet ice cream

Consider the application of efficiency to nearly anything that requires passion- in

"Enemies are the price of success."

“No phenomenon exhibits “being.” All phenomena consist of ongoing

You are a lifter.

● The Chinese Olympic weightlifting team is required to do bodybuilding

● Chen Wei-ling, a Taiwanese weightlifter who snagged Olympic gold in

If you want a beginner oriented book, I recommend Dinosaur Training by

Structuring Your Workouts

As such, here are the standard setups for training:

● Push/Pull/Squat . Pretty straightforward. Day 1 you do upper body

● Bodypart - Train a major bodypart a day. This isn’t rocket surgery. A

The manner in which I typically structure my

I truly despise writing about myself, but I am invariably and incessantly

Pick an exercise or a bodypart. My choice varies from day to day. If I were

Hammer Strength Shoulder Press - 6 x 4-15

Rear Lateral Raises - 4 x 16

To Wrap Things Up…

To be a part of the Zaporozhian Cossacks, the Ukraine’s maniacal mercenary

The Baby Steps Workout

300 Air Squats

Five rounds for time of:

Deadlift - 12 x 155lbs (Same weight men and women)

Hang Power Clean - 9 x 155lbs

Push Jerk - 6 x 155lbs

Good time to beat for Grace:

L inda aka "3 Bars of Death"

10-9-8-7-6-5-4-3-2-1 Reps, For Time

Deadlift (1.5 bodyweight)

Clean (3/4 bodyweight)

Good time to beat Linda:

32 min 03 sec – Fitness Level 0 – Beginner athlete

As I recall, I hit 227 reps with 165 when I weighed 180.

Chef Rush and the White House Bicep Routine from

Seated Alternating Dumbbell Curl - 5 x 25

Wrist Roller - 5 sets

Standing Cambered Bar Curl (close grip)- 4 x 25

Standing Cambered Bar Curl (wide grip)- 4 x 25

Alternating Dumbbell Curl.

Barbell Pullover - 4 x 15 (same weight on each set)

Decline Press - 6 x 10-16 (worked up to 345, then the drop set)

Incline Press - 6 x 10-16 (worked up to 300, then the drop set)

Skullcrushers - 6 x 10-16 (worked up to 345, then the drop set)

Seated Cambered Bar Overhead Extensions - 6 x 10-16 (worked up to 150,

Incline Curl - 4 x 6 x 10-16 (worked up to 85, then the drop set)

Standing Curl - 4 x 6 x 10-16 (all with 120lbs) supersetted with

Preacher Curl - 4 x 6 x 10-16 (all with 110lbs) .

Decline Situps - He did an insane amount of decline situps, starting at the

Hanging Leg Raises - 4 x 15-20 supersetted with

Side Bends (with light dumbbell)- 4 x 15-20

Marvin Eder- A Festival of Pain… Er, I Mean Dips

1000 dips, for time.

Eder managed this in 17 minutes, breaking Jack LaLanne’s record of 20 minutes,

Lee Priest: Demigod-Level Arm Training

Dumbbell Concentration Curl - 5 x 6-8

Barbell Curl - 7 x 6-8