Parent Manual 1

Macmillan Publishers India Pvt. Ltd.
Because
WE
Care...
Annie Chandy Mathew
A parent, a teacher, a grandmother, and a student all her life
MACMILLAN
MACMILLAN
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Dedication ‘While we try to teach
our children all about life,
To my grandson, Joshua, our children teach us
and his little cousins… what life is all about.’
from whom I have learnt much. —Angela Schwindt
Contents
Foreword ...........................4, 5
1. Never too early .....................6
2. We can do plenty ................10
3. Pre-primary school
is important.........................18
4. Teacher or superhero...........23
5. The best environment
for my child ........................27
6. Being safe in pre-school ......32
7. Objectives in pre-school
education.............................33
8. Fostering a love of
reading................................47
9. The importance of
laughter .............................. 56
10. Ready for primary school .... 59
4
Foreword
‘For everything in life, there is some kind of training, but
for parenting none,’ says Shashi, my editor, and suddenly
I understand why I need to share these thoughts with
other parents, grandparents, and teachers.
With the best of intentions, we parents flounder and almost
sink under the responsibility of having to make decisions
(sometimes life-changing and often badly informed) for
our children. They say a sinking man will clutch at a
straw. Hopefully, the suggestions in this book are more
than straws.
Let me begin with a confession which might ease the
minds of parents who may be overwhelmed by the barrage
of suggestions in the book.
I really wish I had thought of all this when I was a young
‘It is the child who parent. But I had no training, was new to the job, and
makes the man, and too hassled to even think. Most of these ideas came to
no man exists who me when my children were no longer children or students
was not made by the even. We had muddled through those early years somehow.
child he once was.’
But, I can’t help wishing that someone had shared these
—Maria Montessori ideas with me when I needed them most. Hopefully, these
suggestions come in time to help my grandson’s generation.
B e c a u s e We C a r e
5
This booklet was written under certain assumptions: ‘The trouble with
being a parent is that
• that parents (grandparents), teachers, and pre-primary centres share the same by the time you are
concerns and goals: to help a child grow in joy, confidence, independence, experienced, you are
and acquire the necessary skills to make a smooth transition to primary unemployed.’
school. Hence, the title: Because We Care. —Anonymous
• that parents are far more nervous about pre-school than the children
themselves and will be glad for some pointers.
• that pre-school teachers can impact our children for life and need to be
appreciated, respected, and given access to the best training possible.
• that certain truths are important enough to be worth repeating, even
at the risk of being offensive.
• that sharing my experience and thoughts as a teacher, educator, mother,
and grandmother will be of some use to the reader.
• that an informal, anecdotal, and conversational tone with as little
jargon as possible is less intimidating than a formal one.
• that this is not, and can never be, the last word on the subject.
It is just the beginning of a dialogue which, hopefully, will prove a
meaningful one.
• that as a woman with a grandson, I can take the liberty of using the
feminine gender when talking about the teacher and the masculine
gender when talking about the child.
6
INTRODUCTION
A n anxious mother once asked Aristotle, the philosopher, ‘When should I

start educating my child?’
‘How old is your child?’ asked the philosopher.

‘Life affords no greater ‘Five years,’ said the woman.
responsibility, no
greater privilege, than ‘Then hurry home and start at once,’ said the wise man. ‘I fear it is five years too
the raising of the next late already.’
generation.’
—C Everet Koop Five years, nine months too late, some neuroscientists such as Patricia Kuhl
and Anne Murphy Paul would say. Their experiments have
proved that ‘language learning begins in the womb’ and
that the foetus is not something inert, floating about
in the amniotic fluid, but a dynamic living being that
responds to external stimuli while still in utero.
1
Given this new understanding of early human
development, one can only echo Aristotle with
Never the same sense of urgency:

the sooner pre-primary
too education begins, the
early better.
7
WE ARE THE CHILD’S FIRST TEACHERS ‘The beginning of

something is always
Learning begins in the womb and we parents are a child’s first teachers. important. Especially
He hears our voices from the very beginning. Our rhythms of speech and life if it is young and
shape his responses to the world that he is born into. Close on our heels come needs time to grow.’
siblings and others who make up the immediate family circle, but it will be —Plato
several years before the influence of teachers and classmates are felt.
Except under very exceptional circumstances, infant joy and infant sorrow are
completely dependent on a child’s first caregivers, the parents. It is we parents
who can ensure that the child is warm, secure, and well fed. Otherwise, we
condemn him to a world of tears, pain, and perceived threats described so
eloquently by William Blake in his Songs of Innocence and Experience.
An infant’s needs are simple and straightforward, his demands direct.

Complexity comes only with time and experience. As parents, it is up to us to
try and understand why he cries and what makes him laugh.
Study the newborn

‘My mother groaned,
It is useful to study the newborn’s pattern of sleep, waking, my father wept. Into
and of feeding, and establish a routine of feeding and the dangerous world
sleeping that is comfortable for both parent and child. Talk I leapt.’
to him constantly for he has spent nine months in the womb —William Blake in
‘Infant Sorrow’
and knows our voices. We are no strangers to him and he is
looking for the comfort of familiarity in an unfamiliar world.
8
‘No significant Provide the right kind of stimuli

learning occurs
without a significant As parents we have the responsibility of providing the right kind of stimuli
relationship.
from the moment of birth, even conception. In our Indian tradition, much
—Dr James Comer
importance is given to what we place first on the tongue of the newborn
child. Most communities insist on something sweet…usually honey. Others
insist on a speck of gold, the purest and the most precious thing they know.
Yet others insist on a combination of gold (the purest) and honey (the
sweetest). How much more important are the first morsels that go into the
feeding of a child’s mind!
Teaching your child to eat, drink, play, walk, speak, communicate through
words and action; teaching him the love of books, shapes, colours, and forms
of nature; teaching him love, trust, cleanliness...all these form the earliest and
most vital part of a child’s informal curriculum. We, his parents, are his first
teachers. Pestalozzi, the great educator once declared emphatically, ‘There can
be no doubt that within the living room of every household are united the
basic elements of all true human education in its whole range’.
‘Each day of our lives we make deposits

in the memory banks of our children.’
—Charles R Swindoll
9
The power to shape his/her mind ‘Any man can be

a father. It takes
Think of the power we have to shape our child’s attitude to life and the world someone special
around him. For the first two and a half to three years of his life, we, his parents, to be a dad.’
control his immediate environment almost completely. The hands that rock —Anonymous
his cradle, feed him and hold him, the mouth that smiles at him, kisses him,
reads and talks to him will rule his life and his world.
This is no idle statement. Until he goes to pre-primary school, we decide

the curriculum, the pedagogical strategy, and the attitudes to be fostered.
Let us not throw away this chance. Never again will we wield such power and
influence in his life.
10
PARENTING RIGHT
N o one can be a perfect mother or father, but we can all try. There is
no single way to get parenting right. There are as many ways to do
it as there are mothers and fathers. What follows are just pointers for those
‘The most important troubled by self-doubt.

thing she’d learned
Begin by establishing communication during a child’s most receptive
over the years was
that there was no time—his waking hours. Let him see our faces, hear our voices, and feel
way to be a perfect our touch. Smiling faces, soft voices, and a gentle touch—one cannot
mother...and a million overemphasise the importance of establishing this primeval bond of love.
ways to be a good
This is the first and the most delightful process of learning for both parent
one.’
and child: those first lessons in gentleness and caring.
—Jill Churchill
2 ‘We may not be able to

prepare the future for our
We can children, but we can at
do plenty least prepare our children
for the future.’
—Franklin D Roosevelt
11
But how do children learn?
They begin by using their five senses or what Huxley calls ‘the doors of
perception’ which open up naturally, given the right stimuli. We do not
have to prise them open. Every child delights in all sense perceptions
whether it is visual (sight), auditory (hearing), tactile (touch), olfactory
(smell), gustatory (taste), or kinaesthetic (movement). Moreover, each time
a child registers some new connection between diverse things, the mind
begins to expand and grow exponentially.
Talk, sing, and read to your child
So, talk to him, sing to him (never mind if you can’t keep a tune, he is
no music critic and he is already biased in your favour) and, of course,
read books to him. Before you know it, he will start associating books with
‘togetherness time’, when your voice is meant exclusively for his delight. He
will grow up to love the bedtime stories and, by association, books.
Unfortunately, many children have books thrust upon them for the first
time in school by total strangers called ‘teachers’. Is it any wonder that many ‘Wisdom begins
of them learn to hate books (associated in their minds with strangers and with wonder.’
enforcement) and love television which is almost always a shared, happy, —Socrates
and relaxed experience with the family?

12
Everything is new to the child

Born with a natural sense of curiosity, children study everything intently.
The world and all things in it are new, imbued with what Wordsworth called
‘the glory and the freshness of a dream’. They have not yet learnt to be
bored. If you doubt the statement, watch an infant who has just discovered
his toes! With what profound joy and intensity does he examine them
again and again! With what gurgling sounds does he try to grab those
wondrously elusive creatures!
Surround the child with colours

Fill the child’s little world with bright vibrant colours (especially the primary
colours—red, blue, and yellow). Colourful mobiles with cut-out shapes
suspended above the cradle will delight him, train his eyes to focus on
moving objects, help him distinguish between colours, and encourage him
to stretch out and reach for them.
Basic shapes and the human body

Introduce the child to circles, squares, rectangles, triangles, stars, diamonds,
‘Come forth into the and irregular shapes; head, hands, face, eyes, nose, ears, lips, legs.
light of things, let Constantly point out objects in books and in real life. Sooner rather than
nature be your teacher.’
later, he will have his Eureka moment and they will start to register in his
—William Wordsworth
mind.
13
The wonders of the world outside
Take the child by the hand and lead him outside. He will delight in the
cars, trucks, birds, animals, people, trees, and clouds. Name them and
don’t hesitate to make appropriate sounds. Car–drrrrr, train–chook-chook,
dog–bow-wow, cat–meow-meow, cow–moo-moo.
Children love to imitate sounds and they start making connections

between the sound and the thing—the picture and the reality. But as
‘Don’t worry that
Pestalozzi reminds us, we must never interfere when nature speaks directly children never listen to
to the child. ‘When he hears a bird warble or an insect hum on a leaf, then, you, worry that they are
always watching you.’
cease your talk; the bird and the insect are teaching; your business is then
—Robert Fulghum
to be silent.’
Show him the shapes that occur in nature—the round or crescent moon,
irregular clouds, the square signboards. I still remember the first time
I took my little grandson to a mithai shop. He was delighted by ‘quare’ burfis,
the ‘yound’ pedas, the ‘yectangula’ Mysore paks, the ‘diament’ kaju katlis,
and the ‘illegula’ jilebis! Every minute and everything can be a new learning
experience. His tongue could not get around the words, but he had no
doubt about the shapes.
14
Introduce the child to people
Encourage the child to smile at others, especially children, and be sociable.

This is an important step before entering pre-primary school where he will
have to make friends with his peers, interact, and negotiate with them:
a giant step for one who has been the sole prince in his own little kingdom!
Encourage the child to touch and feel
As Keats says, ‘Touch has a memory’. It helps a child remember and

recognise objects and textures. It improves hand-eye coordination and
motor skills.
The ‘Don’t touch’ command should be

reserved for dangerous things such as a knife,
fire, or open plug points. Children may not
understand the word ‘Don’t’ at first, but they
will instinctively pick up on the change of
tone.
‘Children need
models more than Never hesitate to introduce the child to new
they need critics.’ tastes and textures once the child is old
—Joseph Joubert enough to try solid food. Variety is the spice of
life and the key to a holistic and healthy diet.
15
Emulation, repetition, applause ‘I can’t tell my

children to reach
One must never forget that while much is learnt by for the sun. All
instinct, more is learnt by emulation. Avoid being a I can do is reach
‘Do as I say, not as I do’ parent (Scot Peck in The Road for it, myself.’
Less Travelled). —Joyce Maynard
Learning is anchored by repetition and internalised

by experience. Reinforce learning through constant
repetition and applause. Have you ever heard an infant
complaining about repetition? Never. He delights
in playing peek-a-boo endlessly behind spread out
hands and loves hearing the same stories ad nauseam.
It is the older child and the adult mind that cannot tolerate
repetition. Never hesitate to repeat and above all, never fail
to clap your hands and applaud. It is amazing what a child
‘Affirming words from
will do just to hear applause.
moms and dads are like
Eating with the family light switches. Speak a
word of affirmation at the
Introduce a child gradually to a little of everything at the family right moment in a child’s
table. Give him a plate and spoon of his own, so that he can life and it’s like lighting
up a whole roomful of
also do what others are doing. No doubt, it will be a long
possibilities.’
and trying time before he learns to eat without spilling or
—Gary Smalley
walk without falling. But the child’s sense of importance
and achievement will be worth any spillage or mess.
16
Always encourage and applaud

The important thing is to be positive always. Mistakes are natural
and inevitable. Don’t run too quickly to help a child who trips a little.
Small falls and knocks are an important part of growing up, learning, and
living. Urge the child to get up and keep going, no matter what. It is a
lesson that is absolutely vital in life.
But most of all, we parents must

ensure that learning is fun and
rewarding. The child must never be
forced to try too hard or associate
failure with guilt. Learning must
always be an exciting game that
‘Not all children are
one never tires of playing—the best
ready to learn the same
thing at the same time preparation for the game of life.
in the same way.’
—Kathy Walker
17
Each child is different

We must realise that all children
develop in different ways and cross
various milestones at different times.
One child will walk or talk earlier
than another. One child may recite
more nursery rhymes, remember
more stories, or be able to identify
more shapes and colours. We must
never compare children and make
them feel inadequate. Encourage and
applaud each time they try. It is the
‘It is easier to build
trying that is important. Most vital of strong children than
all—make sure they are secure in the to repair broken
knowledge of your love. men.’
—Frederick Douglass
‘The greatest terror a child can have
is that he is not loved, and rejection
is the hell he fears,’ writes Steinbeck
in East of Eden. At this stage, you can
ensure that he never enters that hell
that no child deserves.
18
A TODDLER’S BRAIN
W
‘We worry about e, in India, are obsessed with performances in the all-important
what a child will
board examinations. It could make or break him, we say. Yet, are
become tomorrow,
yet we forget that he we aware of the fact that the ability to grasp new information and ideas
is someone today.’ peaks at the tender age of three?
—Stacia Tauscher
Scientists have confirmed that a three-year-old toddler’s brain develops
over one hundred trillion brain synapses. The rule of thumb is—the
more synapses, the more learning! What a waste if the right kind of
pre-primary schooling does not take advantage of this tremendous, almost
inexhaustible potential for learning at that age!
First step outside home
3
Pre-primary school is a child’s first step
outside the familiar surroundings of the
Pre- home, the first step he takes (in a sense)

without his parents. It is a widening out
primary of that close and intimate circle he has
school is known hitherto. This stepping out will

prepare him for traditional school with
important its more structured education and
longer periods away from home.
19
Foundation for a lifetime of learning ‘Little children, from the

moment they are weaned,
The pre-primary classroom with a restricted number of students are making their way
and trained teachers plays a vital role in laying a strong foundation towards independence.’
for a lifetime of learning and holistic development. Here the child —Maria Montessori
learns to follow directions given to a group; to communicate,
interact, and negotiate with his peers and teachers. This spurt in
social interaction and emotional growth is imperative especially
in these days of small nuclear families. In joint families of earlier
times, one could take this more or less for granted. Nowadays,
it is often in the pre-primary school that a child begins for the first
time to learn to care for and share with others his own age.
Developing independence and discipline

Pre-primary school is an opportunity for him
to develop independence, discipline, and
enlarge physical and motor skills. Getting
dressed for school every day at a particular
‘The circle of knowledge
time, carrying his bag, playing, eating and commences close round a
performing with other children, learning self- man and thence stretches
out concentrically.’
control, and managing without a diaper...all
are undeniably important milestones on the —Johann Pestalozzi
journey to regular school.

20
Age-appropriate learning
In addition, trained teachers ensure age-appropriate pre-reading, pre-

writing, cognitive, and motor skills. The added bonus is the acceleration
gained by learning also from peers.
‘Education then…is
the great equaliser We parents, as a whole, tend to place undue emphasis on the traditional
of the conditions of
men, the balance- trinity of reading, writing, and arithmetic. But children at this stage are
wheel of the social often not quite ready for these. They have just started to decipher those
machinery.’
mysterious symbols on paper, relating them to sounds and ideas. Their little
—Horace Mann
hands are still unable to grip pencils properly and they are yet to realise
that their fingers and toes
also have mathematical
applications. We need to
give them time. To be too
ambitious about reading,
writing, and arithmetic at
this stage could leave the
child ‘reeling and writhing’
to quote the Mock Turtle
in Alice in Wonderland.
21
Build a strong base for primary school education

Pre-primary education helps the child grow rapidly in a
controlled but not rigid environment. It increases the child’s
confidence, concentration, and independence, and to quote
Vimala Ramachandran et al on the subject, ‘It has a strong bearing
on the attendance and participation of children once they enter
primary school.’
Vimala Ramachandran also points out that in a country like India

where so many are below the poverty line, ‘It also helps older
children, particularly girls, to attend their schools making them
free from the responsibility of sibling care.’
‘If we are to teach real

peace in this world, and if
we are to carry on a real
war against war, we shall
have to begin with the
children.’
—Mohandas
Karamchand Gandhi
22
Dress rehearsal for life
In a multicultural country like India, a pre-

primary centre with children from various
backgrounds, religions, and mother tongues is a
microcosm of the world the child will inherit. It is
here that he will learn to live and let live; here he
will learn the values of friendship and tolerance;
to settle disputes with words instead of blows; to
arrive at mutually beneficial compromises; to live
in harmony amongst diversity.
Truly, as Maria Montessori said, ‘Preventing war is

the work of politicians, establishing peace is the
work of educationists.’
In short, the pre-primary classroom is an indispensable dress rehearsal for

life. Which performance is a success without a dress rehearsal?
23
A crying need for trained teachers ‘No one should teach

who is not in love
I n India, you need a doctorate to teach in the University, a Masters or a

Bachelors degree in Education to teach in Primary, Secondary, or High
School but (as yet) few such stringent regulations govern the recruitment
with teaching.’
—Margaret E Sangster
of teachers at the pre-primary school level. While there are teacher training
centres set up by the Government and other agencies, the training is not
mandatory by law. This is ironic because a child’s first exposure to teaching
decides, to a large extent, his lifelong attitude to learning.
India needs to invest in training teachers to provide high quality early

childhood education and in making it accessible to all. Research has proved
beyond doubt that the earliest years are the best time to shape the social,
academic, and cognitive skills of a child for the brain is just developing.
Realising that pre-primary education can impact a child for life, it is about
time that we evolved a system to ensure that our children are taught by a
trained, committed, and well-remunerated workforce of teachers who view
teaching not just as a profession but a vocation.
Recognising goals 4
‘The ultimate end of education is not perfection in the accomplishments Teacher or
of the school, but fitness for life; not the acquirement of habits of blind
obedience, and of prescribed diligence, but a preparation for independent
superhero
action,’ said Pestalozzi in his Letters on Infants’ Education.

24
‘One of the great This is the goal the pre-primary teacher is working towards: ‘preparation
problems of our
for independent action’ and ‘fitness for life’. Towards this end, she tries
time is that many
are schooled but to provide an environment in which the child can grow without fear
few are educated.’ and which takes into account the fact that human beings have multiple
—Thomas Moore
intelligences and all of them need to be nurtured. To sum up, in
Maria Montessori’s words: ‘Plainly, the environment must be a living one,
directed by a higher intelligence, arranged by an adult who is prepared for
his mission.’
Providing a sense of security
To optimise learning, a child must feel secure. This is made possible

by the teacher who, in this case, is also a caregiver. Both Pestalozzi and
Maria Montessori, pioneers in pre-primary education, state emphatically
that no learning takes place without this.
‘The curriculum is so
much necessary raw ‘Without love, neither the physical nor the intellectual powers will develop
material but warmth is naturally,’ insisted Pestalozzi and, to the amazement of his colleagues, he
the vital element for the
banned flogging in his schools in the nineteenth century. Maria Montessori
growing plant and for
the soul of the child.’ echoes this same belief when she insists, ‘Of all things love is the most
—Carl Jung potent.’ The pre-primary teacher has to be a loving parent, a firm teacher,
and a willing nanny—all rolled into one!
25
Igniting interest ‘The important thing is

not so much that every
A pre-primary school teacher has to devise and develop lesson plans and child should be taught,
teaching strategies to motivate children to learn by arousing their curiosity as that every child
and interest. At this stage, the child is all eager and willing and the teacher should be given the wish
needs to foster not kill these very qualities. She has to prepare audio/visual to learn.’
aids and other teaching materials using available resources imaginatively —John Lubbock
‘to ignite’ (Dr APJ Abdul Kalam’s phrase) the spark within.
Organising activities
It is the pre-primary school teacher who ensures the development of the
physical, social, cognitive, and imaginative abilities of the children through
field trips, simulations, songs, stories, games, drawings, paintings, and
imaginative role plays. Even more challenging is the task of promoting
team spirit without killing individual enterprise or blurring each child’s
unique contribution to the group.
Observing, assessing, and recording

A pre-primary school teacher has to observe closely, assess correctly,
and record faithfully each child’s progress for her own reference and to
share with the child’s parents/guardians. This tracking of progress can
help achieve optimum development and ensure a successful transition
to primary school. She has to maintain a good equation and interaction
with the parents/guardians for it will help her to gain new insights into the
child’s mind. This partnership can be very fruitful but is often made difficult
by parents who can be extremely opinionated, and no two parents think alike.
26
‘A teacher affects Ensuring safety

eternity; he can
never tell where his Together with teaching assistants and nursery nurses, the pre-primary
influence stops.’ teacher is expected to plan outdoor and indoor activities, taking care
—Henry Adams to ensure the comfort and safety of the children entrusted to her care.
Any one who has been daring enough to take more than two children
on an outing will realise that this is no mean task and often requires a
superhuman effort.
Staying ahead
Finally, despite her tasking everyday schedule, the pre-primary teacher has
to keep ahead of changes in curriculum and new strategies for accelerating
learning in children.
In short, the teacher has to be a facilitator, a coordinator, an organiser,

a database manager, an artistic director, and a human resource person.
I often think that a pre-primary teacher could easily be an effective model
for a new and more relevant kind of a superhero for the modern world!
‘A teacher who is attempting to teach

without inspiring the pupil with a desire
to learn is hammering on cold iron.’
—Horace Mann
27
Importance of choosing carefully ‘I happy am,

Joy is my name.’
E very child is joy embodied till time and the world

snatches that joy away. It is the sacred duty of
parents and pre-primary schools to ensure that the
—William Blake
in ‘Infant Joy’
experience of learning is a joyful one, unclouded

(as far as possible) by sadness or insecurity. Joy, or
the lack of it, can affect the quality of his learning.
So, choose your child’s pre-primary school carefully.
Choose one that is not too far away from home, one that is spacious, bright
with natural light, filled with things, and colours that will delight a child’s
senses, inviting him to touch, smell, and explore in safety.
It is worth searching for a school where the teachers are well-trained and
experienced and the ratio of adult to child is good; a school that employs
5
teachers who love teaching and the children they teach.
Child-centric schools
Search for a school which is child-centric and offers a diversified learning The best
environment to develop a child’s multiple intelligences. Every child is environment
for my child
different, as is each country and neighbourhood. Accordingly, pre-primary
schools are also bound to be highly diverse in social, linguistic, and cultural
terms. Finding the right match is half the challenge.
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Find a school that recognises that every child is unique following his own
learning curve; that has a curriculum which emphasises the balanced
development of a child helping him to grow physically, emotionally,
socially, mentally; that accepts that the aim of true education is to make the
child independent of the teacher; that nurtures his psyche and teaches him
the values of truth and love. Talk to parents who already have children in
the school before deciding.
Common misconceptions
While waiting to pick up my grandson from playschool, I have often heard
remarks like the following:
‘It is all very well to encourage children to play, to sing, and draw pictures,
but when are they going to start learning? They have not even started on
the alphabet or numbers.’
‘The conviction that the best The play-way is an excellent way to start learning and have fun at the same
way to prepare children for a time. There is plenty of time for the alphabet and numbers to be introduced
harsh, rapidly changing world is
later.
to introduce formal instruction
at an early age is wrong. There ‘Pleasure, perception, and participation’ are the three principles around
is simply no evidence to support
it, and considerable evidence which all pre-primary school activities should be centred. A child should be
against it.’ encouraged to play, explore, and interact to achieve what Pestalozzi called
—David Elkind ‘Learning by head, hand, and heart.’
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Children need to understand that the squiggles on the page bear a very
concrete connection to the stories they love before they start to read.
The muscles in their hand need to be strengthened by playing with play
dough and drawing before they attempt to write.
I am eternally grateful to the understanding teacher who let my daughter

sit through two terms in school without forcing her to write. An unwilling
hand should never be forced to hold a pencil or writing will become a
hated activity and the handwriting could well reflect that.
‘You know, I was watching. The teacher just stood there smiling while my
child coloured the cat purple. Should she not have corrected her?’
How long will it take for a child to figure out that a cat is not purple?
Is the reality of a drab black, white, or brown cat greater than a resplendent
purple cat—that magnificent creature of a child’s imagination? This could
well be the world of a possible Picasso or a George Rodrigue of the Blue
Dog fame! Uninhibited by mere reality, let a child’s imagination soar! ‘Imagination is more
He will encounter reality soon enough. important than
knowledge. Knowledge
‘Never help a child with a task at which he feels he can succeed,’ said is limited. Imagination
Maria Montessori. As for Pestalozzi, he placed a special emphasis on encircles the world.’
spontaneous self activity. No ready-made answers were given to a child. —Albert Einstein
Children were encouraged to see, judge, and reason for themselves.

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‘My child is having a lot of fun, I admit. The teachers took a lot of trouble
setting up a little vegetable and fruit market, a bank, roads with toy cars,
buses, and bicycles for them to drive around. But finally it is only make-
believe. When will the fun cease and studies begin in earnest?’
May the fun never cease, for ‘fun’ is the way forward. The children were
not just playing. They were learning about buying and selling, commerce,
banking, industry, and respect for traffic rules. They were learning to
live and negotiate with others. They had started studies in earnest.
The ‘make-believe’ games help them to understand and internalise basic
concepts in addition to fostering positive values and attitudes…all of which
constitute true learning.
We parents could complement

this by taking the child to the
supermarket, park, and beach;
or working in the garden with
him, cooking with him, or
‘It should be remembered
that children at play are asking him to help wash the
not playing about; their car. There is no better way of
games should be seen
learning than doing...and the
as their most serious-
minded activity.’ shared memories will last a
—Montaigne lifetime.
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So, find a school that lets him play and be joyful. For it is in play that he
should take his first steps in learning. Recognising the learning potential
inherent in play, Einstein said, ‘Play is the best form of research.’ He should
know.
Sharing responsibility
Children learn through play and when

given a chance to participate in daily
routines around the house and classroom ‘A person soon
as a ‘helper and working member’ whose learns how little
he knows when a
contribution is appreciated. So we need child begins to ask
schools that foster this ethos, giving questions.’
children responsibilities and jobs they —Richard L Evans
are capable of performing.
‘The child becomes a person through

work,’ said Maria Montessori and true
education helps a child grow into a
person.
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‘A child seldom Questions to ask before enrolling your child

needs a good
talking to as a • Are there enough trained staff members to
good listening to.’ ensure that your child is not neglected?
—Robert Brault • Is the building safe? Are there dangerously steep

steps or isolated areas where a child could be in
danger?
• Are the play equipment, furniture, and toys
sufficiently well-maintained to ensure safety and
‘Develop a cutting- hygiene?
edge plan to raise
the quality of your Talk to your child and encourage him/her to talk
I
early learning t is necessary these days to tell a child that he should never wander off
programs.’ alone, that he should not accept gifts from strangers, and that he should
—Barack Obama always stay with the group in school.
In addition, encourage a child to talk about his day: his joys and his sorrows.
That way you will sense if anything at all is amiss. Never let children feel
they are being judged or criticised based on what they reveal for that may
6 put an end to the confidences that pour out so naturally otherwise.
Travelling to school by bus

Being Make sure that if your child travels by the school bus, he is never alone,
safe in especially if he is the first to board or the last to alight. In such cases, keep
track of other children who board or alight at the same stop and keep in
pre-school touch with those parents. These days you can take nothing for granted and
while there is no need to be paranoid, our children are precious and must
be protected.
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F ulfilling a child’s potentialities is the guideline to be followed while

formulating a pre-school curriculum. ‘It is true that we cannot make
a genius. We can only give to each child the chance to fulfil his potential
‘An education is about
the whole child, self-
possibilities,’ said Maria Montessori. esteem, resilience,
awareness of the world.
Holistic development and multiple intelligences
It is not just being
The first and foremost objective of pre-primary education is to ensure a schooled and reciting
well-balanced development of children in the physical, intellectual, the alphabet.’
social, emotional, ethical, and aesthetic spheres. The play-way method is —Kathy Walker
advocated as the most natural and because joy is every child’s birthright.
Nobody has a right to snatch away that joy, least of all in the name of
empowering the child through education. At this level, all formal teaching
of subjects and formal evaluation programmes are banned (for obvious
reasons) at the pre-primary school level.
There are four well-recognised areas of

developmental objectives in curriculum
7
framework at the pre-primary level:
• Physical development
• Cognitive and Linguistic development Objectives
• Social development
in pre-school
• Aesthetic or Artistic development
These four objectives in turn may be

education
achieved through activities that fall broadly into six learning areas.

34
‘Beginning nutrition 1. Physical Fitness, Sensory Experiences, Nutrition, and

education in early Motor Skills
childhood is an
important part of The best learning happens when there is a healthy mind in a healthy
helping to ensure that body. It is imperative these days to inculcate a love of healthy food as
children will achieve
opposed to junk food. Introduce children early to the exciting world of
healthful lifestyles.’
fruits, nuts, and vegetables that will give them ‘super’ health powers in life.
—Robert Earl
Organise activities for children to enjoy and understand the
importance of physical activity and rest. Let them not become
couch potatoes or hyperactive fiends. They need to learn that both
activity and rest are essential and that there is a time and a place for
everything.
The delights of the five senses

Let children learn by looking around, seeing things, producing sounds,
listening to sounds, touching objects, smelling objects, and even
tasting or throwing them (where appropriate). This will improve their
powers of observation, concentration, and motor skills. They will also
begin to understand concepts such as big–small, soft–hard, hot–cold,
sweet–sour, black–white, fast–slow, noise–silence, activity–rest.
‘Too often we give
children answers to Let children play with play dough and building blocks. Let them paint,
remember rather than colour, and scribble. Let them learn to draw ‘sleeping’ lines, ‘standing’
problems to solve.’ lines, ‘bending’ lines, crosses, circles, squares, and triangles. Before you
—Roger Lewin know it, they will be ready to read and write!
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2. Linguistic Ability—Mother Tongue and Target Language

The acquisition of language is related to the thinking process and is the
key to the rapid acquisition of knowledge. But it is important that the
basic skills of communicating/speaking and listening/comprehension
must be honed before the more advanced skills of reading and writing
are taught. ‘What we want is to
see the child in pursuit
At the pre-primary stage, it is best not to overemphasise the skills
of knowledge, and not
of reading and writing. This is said at the outset for it is a fact that knowledge in pursuit of
overanxious parents often demand worksheets and homework, the child.’
believing that this is best for the child. But if children are not yet —George Bernard Shaw
ready, forcing them to acquire these skills too early may actually prove
counterproductive.
Songs and rhymes

Instead, let children learn the thrill of communicating through speech.
Give them songs to sing and rhymes to recite including alphabet
rhymes and number rhymes. Their phonic skills, vocabulary, and even
cognitive skills will improve in leaps and bounds. If they are not ready
yet to speak and recite, let them mimic the actions and pretty soon the
words will follow. Next they will figure out that the words they speak
are related to the symbols on the page or screen and that, with a little
help, they can read the symbols and copy them too!
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Phonemic awareness
As long as children understand, that words are made up of different
sounds (phonemes) and that these phonemes can be moved, grouped
together, and played around with endlessly (p-a-t, t-a-p) creating new
and wonderful patterns, the children have begun their first steps in
reading. Throughout the day, at home and in school, you can play
games—listing things that begin with the same sound: bus-bun-bat-
bread, child-chair-chilli-chapatti, toy-table-tin-tree. There is no harm
in nonsense words being coined by children as long as they get the
phonemes right. It will help if we emphasise the relevant phoneme:
bbbread, bbbun, bbbottle, bbbutter.
Phonemic awareness activities are perfect for pre-school children.

They deal only with sounds and require no reading or writing.
Then you can go a stage further (phonics) and connect sounds with
letters. Play a sound matching game telling your child what letter
(or group of letters) represents each sound. Hold up the letter T and
point to your tooth, the table, a tree, and a toy.
‘Trust yourself. You
know more than you If from there you move on to a simple rhyming activity: cat-mat-sat-
think you do.’
pat-bat-fat-hat, look-book-cook-took-hook (which children always
—Dr Benjamin Spock
love), you have moved on to even more complex phonological
awareness!
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Don’t let the jargon intimidate you for you have already mastered these
skills and your child is now already halfway home. Your child’s ability to
identify, manipulate, and play with sounds (phonemes) combined with
the ability to match the sounds with the letters (phonics) is the best
preparation for a successful reader.
The more the merrier

It must be added here that the more languages children are exposed
to at this stage, the greater will be their facility with languages at later
stages in life. There is no virtue in ensuring that they are exposed only
to one language. At most their vocabulary in that language may be a
‘Children must be
little ahead of their peers for a while, but not for long. taught how to think,
No child is genetically programmed to speak Hindi, Malayalam, or not what to think.’
English. He learns the language/languages he is exposed to. Hence, in —Margaret Mead

childhood, silence is silver and speech golden.
In India, most children start with exposure to the mother tongue and
very soon they are exposed to English, the target language and a
whole host of what we can call ‘neighbourhood’ languages. This early
exposure to a babble of languages does not create confusion; rather
it helps the child with easy acquisition of language skills later in life.
This is probably part of the reason why many Indians find it easy to
‘acquire’ a new language when transplanted into a new environment.
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Getting ready to write

As for writing, most children need to strengthen the muscles in their
hand before the grip on the pencil is right. Let them knead play dough,
“Not everything that do free drawing, connect dots, write in sand or grain. (Is that not what
counts can be counted. we do traditionally in India anyway?)
Not everything that can
be counted counts.” Acquaint them with their good friends the ‘Sleeping Line’, the
—Albert Einstein ‘Standing Line’, the ‘Slanting Line’, the ‘Bending Line’, the ‘Circle’, and the
‘Half Circles.’ This is far more useful than actually teaching them a
cursive hand at this stage.
I will always remember how an enthusiastic playschool taught my

grandson to write a beautiful cursive hand through fun drills. We
were all so proud of his handwriting. Then he went to ‘regular’ school
and was made to ‘unlearn’ what he had mastered and learn a slightly
different version of cursive handwriting. The resultant confusion is
reflected in his handwriting even today, five years down the line.
There’s more to writing than pencil and paper

Writing legibly and neatly is a physical skill but writing coherently and
developing ideas is a mental skill. The latter can be taught pleasurably
at an early stage by involving children in building up a narrative orally
or by helping them to describe something they are holding.
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You can help by asking leading questions: Is it big or small? ‘Pure mathematics
What colour is it? Where did you find it? What do we do with it? Do you is, in its way, the
poetry of logical
like it? Why do you like/not like it? In the process, children are learning
ideas.’
to think, articulate, form opinions based on reasons, learning question
—Albert Einstein
words, and formats. How many cognitive activities are involved and
how naturally are they being prepared for writing compositions and
articulating their thoughts in a structured fashion?
Reading and writing need not leave them reeling and writhing, now or
ever. ‘Arithmetic is being
able to count up to
3. Basic Numeracy not Complex Arithmetic twenty without taking
When I was an infant and went to school, off your shoes.’
I sat upon a tiny stool. —Mickey Mouse
I learnt my letters, my A B C,
And counted on my little fingers 1 2 3.
This was a song I remember my grandmother singing to me every day,

proudly displaying the one English song she had learnt in school.
While one can teach children to rattle off numbers one to ten on their
little fingers, it is more important at this stage to teach them some really
basic concepts in mathematics: less–more, longer–shorter, bigger–smaller,
heavier–lighter. Everyday experience will serve: ‘Daddy is bigger than me.’
‘There are more apples on this plate than that one’. It is the best way to
learn concepts such as size, weight, and measurement, naturally.
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Multiplication tables, Addition, Skip counting all call for an

understanding of patterning. Creating patterns with coloured pencils
or painted blocks or beads is a good beginning at the pre-primary
level, leading to the mastery of mathematical skills.
Sorting and classifying objects according to their sizes, shape, and

colour will help the child recognise how objects are different and how
they are similar. Identifying round and square objects in the house and
classroom, sorting out the spherical beads and flat ones could be your
child’s first simple steps towards geometry.
Pre-school is not the time for actual addition, subtraction, division, and
multiplication, which should come much later.
At the pre-primary stage, like the

‘Equipped with his five Mock Turtle in Alice in Wonderland, we
senses, man explores the may dismiss them calling them ‘the
universe around him
different branches of Arithmetic—
and calls the adventure
Science.’ Ambition, Distraction, Uglification, and
—Edwin Powell Hubble Derision,’ to be dealt with much later.
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4. Everyday Concepts in Science ‘Every kid starts out as

a natural-born scientist,
Science, technology, and living—all three are inextricably woven and then we beat it out
together in the everyday life of a child. A child learns by observing of them. A few trickle
natural phenomena: day and night, sunshine and clouds, the through the system
with their wonder and
movement of wind and wave, sprouting seeds, and flowering plants, enthusiasm for science
animals, birds, reptiles, and insects. Equally, a child learns from intact.’
watching you switch on the light or television, clicking a photograph, —Carl Sagan
working on a computer, or running a mixer.
Satisfy children’s natural curiosity. Train them to observe, concentrate,

and think for themselves. More pertinent questions about how things
actually work will come later. When a child takes apart a toy, don’t
scold him for being destructive. Teach him the mechanics of it, how to
repair it if possible, or even why some toys cannot be put back together
again. Like Humpty Dumpty? Exactly!
5. Self and the World Around

Fostering the individual
One of the most important lessons to be learnt at this stage is
to acquire a sense of self (intrapersonal skills) in a world filled with
‘Education is the most
others with whom you need to interact (interpersonal and social powerful weapon which you
skills). It is the sense of the individual as a microcosm in relation to the can use to change the world.’
macrocosm (the universe) or the larger reality. —Nelson Mandela
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Many individual activities are required to help children to discover their

own unique talents and foster the same. This coupled with applause
from the teacher and the group will reinforce the positive self-esteem
and confidence of the child.
Becoming a team player

Group activities will help children become team players who can
contribute to something larger than themselves. This could give them
a wonderful sense of belonging and teach them to negotiate with
the outside world without resorting to blows or violence. They can be
taught to care and share and hopefully, they will learn to reach out and
help others not just reach out and grab.
Responsibility
‘The world is not ours. We hold it in trust for future generations,’ said
Kofi Annan. Our generation failed to learn it well. Let us hope that
the next generation masters it for our world is poised on the edge of
‘If you want children disaster. While the education of yesterday underlined the importance
to keep their feet on of the three R’s—Reading, ’Riting, ’Rithmetic, today the three R’s are:
the ground, put some Reduce, Reuse, and Recycle.
responsibility on their
shoulders.’ Children can learn the importance of switching off lights when not
—Abigail Van Buren needed, of saving drinking water and trees, and of course, not littering.
The three R’s of today combined with the three Rs of yesterday might
serve to create an awareness that might still save the world.
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6. Art Appreciation, Aesthetics, Imagination

Appreciation of beautiful things is almost
‘The debt we owe
instinctive in a child. Observation, constant to the play of the
exposure to, and participation in various art forms imagination is
are wonderful ways of fostering the imagination. incalculable.’
—Carl Jung
Drawing, painting, sculpting
Freehand drawing, colouring a given picture,
finger painting, vegetable art, play dough
sculptures, spray painting, using stencils and
cut-outs, collages, origami, pottery—our young
Michaelangelos and Amrita Sher Gils should be
encouraged to try everything that will strengthen
their hand-eye coordination, aesthetic sense, and
latent artistic ability.
Dance, music, drama

Freestyle dancing, ballet, classical dancing, folk dancing—all forms
of dancing will help self-expression, strengthen motor skills, provide
exercise, and increase concentration.
As for music and drama, they encourage participation and can give a
child the confidence needed to perform not just on the school stage
but on the stage of life.
44
‘If you want your Appropriate music coupled with movement satisfies the body’s urge to
children to be
move, hones the brain’s recognition of mathematical patterns, the ear’s
intelligent, read them
fairy tales. If you instinctive response to sound stimuli encouraging a vocal response
want them to be more in turn. Beating time will also encourage hand-eye coordination and
intelligent, read them
more fairy tales.’ result in the counting of beats.
—Albert Einstein
Nursery rhymes and fairy tales
Singing the all-too-familiar (to us, not them) nursery rhymes

not only helps build memory and phonological awareness,
enlarge vocabulary, and familiarise children with life situations
(The Wheels on the Bus, Jack and Jill, Humpty Dumpty),
they also help teach them routines (Here We Go ’round the
Mulberry Bush, One Two Buckle My Shoe), natural phenomena
(Twinkle Twinkle Little Star), help deal with concepts of good
and bad, right and wrong (There was a little Girl, Mary Had
a Little Lamb, Little Boy Blue, Georgie Porgie), and most
importantly help paint pictures in their heads (a spider
‘The fact that children can make
beautiful music is less significant frightening a girl, a lamb in school).
than the fact that music can make
beautiful children.’ In these days of addiction to the idiot box, one cannot overemphasise
—Cherly Lavender the need to awaken and exercise the imagination.
45
Art—an aid to memory, enjoyment, and understanding
Music and rhythm are an aid to memory and can help orchestrate
group performances where they have to stay in sync with each other.
Role play can help children understand what is expected of them and
help them articulate their doubts and fears.
Drama and dramatic readings can teach them to enjoy their books and
the lessons in them.
Drawing, painting, or any form of creativity expands a child’s ability to

interact with, understand, and appreciate the outer world of nature
and objects.
Helps to explore and express their inner selves
Creativity in art helps children explore their inner selves...not in any

conscious way but instinctively. ‘Art in all forms can be therapeutic’, says
Feldman and can help them say the ‘unsayable’: express joy through
‘Every child is an
vibrant colours, and loss through bleak images. artist. The problem
is how to remain
Children often express visually what they haven’t got the vocabulary
an artist after he
for yet. Their artwork does not have to be masterpieces to grows up.’
communicate or have meaning. —Pablo Picasso
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‘Teaching kids to Enhances cognitive processes

count is fine, but
teaching them what As if all these were not enough, art enhances a child’s cognitive
counts is best.’ processes: problem-solving, thinking, and using symbol systems to
—Bob Talber record their perception and feelings.
For all this, children must remain at the heart of the art curriculum.
Art must be encouraged as a means of expression, exploration,
discovery, and play. The emphasis should not be so much on content;
skills, knowledge, techniques for the process is more important than
the end product which should always be applauded.
Learning about others and our interdependence

In a country like India, where we have diverse cultures and
communities living together, art becomes a way of understanding self
in relation to others, learning about others and a wonderful means for
recognising our interdependence. So, celebrate every festival: Diwali,
Ganesh Chaturthi, Onam, Guru Purab, Dussera, Holi, Lohri, Id,
Christmas, Easter with rangoli, kolam, alpana, pookalam, painting Easter
eggs, making Christmas decorations, and introducing children to the
appropriate music and dance forms associated with the festivals.
Our country is blessed with a rich heritage and our children must learn
to take pride in it.
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W riting in the 1930s Aldous Huxley’s path-breaking Brave New World

posits a frightening world where human beings are mass-produced.
Human embryos are decanted in bottles and subjected to various tests
and simulated conditions to ensure the type and quality of human being
required. After birth, the conditioning continues in Neo-Pavlovian centres
to erase all traces of individuality that can be disruptive to the regimen.
Naturally, the love of books and reading heads the list of things to be
eliminated. Infants who have just learnt to crawl are lined up before a
colourful display of open books. As they gurgle and smile and reach for the ‘Oh, magic hour, when a
pictures, they are subjected to loud clanging noises and a series of mild child first knows she can
read printed words!’
electric shocks. The children retreat crying. After the procedure is repeated
—Betty Smith
several times, the children start to cry the minute they see books. They are
cured of books for life!
What a horrible world where young minds are conditioned to hate books
and reading! Yet, we do precisely that to our children without realising it. 8
Our children invariably watch television with their families who talk, laugh, Fostering
and discuss the shows on the screen. Naturally, children love this ‘family
a love of
time’ together. But as for reading books, it is a lonely activity which they
resent because books are often associated in their minds only with forced
reading
learning, school, and separation from family.
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Here are a few tips on how to prevent this and ‘condition’ children’s minds
to love reading.
Reading is important
‘A house without books
is like a room without First and foremost, if you are not already convinced, you need to convince
windows. No man has yourself that reading is vital, as necessary for growth and life as air, food,
a right to bring up and water.
his children without
surrounding them with Betty Smith in A Tree Grows in Brooklyn says, ‘The world was hers for the
books, if he has the reading.’ How true! The whole world of human history, geography, and
means to buy them.’ thinking waits to be discovered in books.
—Horace Mann
‘Once you learn to read, you will be forever free,’ said Fredrick Douglass.
Reading sets your mind free from all shackles. You have not just one teacher
but a million and yet none can wield the cane. It is your right to choose or
discard ideas, improve upon them, and share your own.
‘Books are the plane, and the train, and the road. They are the destination,
and the journey. They are home,’ declared Anna Quindlen in How Reading
Changed My Life. Indeed, we can soar high or travel at the speed of light.
Words can transport us anywhere, any time. They have none of the
shortcomings of other modes of transport. Books can take us wherever,
whenever, however….
‘Reading is to the mind what exercise is to the body,’ said Joseph Addison.
Unless one is constantly reading and engaging with ideas and facts, our
cognitive powers will begin to atrophy and die as surely as our muscles do
when we do not exercise.
49
Reading helps us to effortlessly slip into ‘another’s skin, another’s voice,

another’s soul,’ said Joyce Carol Oates. Reading is a way of empathising with
others, of living a thousand lives not just our own. It enriches us as human
beings in ways that are difficult to describe.
Would you deny such a gift to your child? A gift that opens the doors of
knowledge and life: a gift that sets him free. You want to give your child the
world? Teach him to read.
Where do I begin?
a. Start early. It’s never too early to start your child on books. Choose
bright and colourful books to see, to touch and even taste. (Didn’t
Francis Bacon say ‘some books should be tasted’?)
Jokes apart, let children start by liking books for their bright colours,
the crackle of the pages, the textures (‘touch and feel’), and the smell
of paper. Then, when you start to point to pictures and read out the ‘I would be most content if
my children grew up to be
text with expression and action, it becomes an amusing and exciting
the kind of people who think
game. They will start associating books with fun and that is an excellent decorating consists mostly of
beginning. building enough bookshelves.’
—Anna Quindlen
b. Surround your child with books. Keep books all around the house all
the time. Children will begin to view it as part of their everyday life like
their favourite people and toys.
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‘Children are made c. Carry books with you when you travel. Stephen King reminds us,
readers on the laps ‘Books are a uniquely portable magic.’ After all how much space does a
of their parents.’
book take and it weighs but a few grams.
—Emilie Buchwald
d. Read books. Children always emulate adults. Seeing you read the
paper first thing in the morning, curl up with a book in your spare time,
accompanying you to a bookshop and library—influence your child
in ways you do not realise. If we parents enjoy reading, we transmit
that joy far more effectively than any admonishment to read repeated
endlessly.
e. Provide easy access. Keep a shelf of favourite books that your child’s
little hands can reach without help from you. Let the magic work.
f. Don’t sit in front of the television screen with your child. Once
hooked on to the television screen, it is difficult to wean him away.
Watch television after he sleeps if you must.
g. TV only after your child is hooked on to books. No one can deny

that television too can contribute to a child’s education especially if
‘Children spell love... you select programmes and channels carefully. Young children enjoy
T-I-M-E.’ Animal Planet and National Geographic almost as much as they do
—Dr Anthony P Witham cartoons. Use the titles and subtitles as reading lessons, increasing their
desire to start deciphering those mysterious symbols.
51
h. Set aside time every day just for reading. At the allotted time,
switch off the telephone, the television and devote time to sharing
the excitement of a book with him. Let your child hold the book and
turn the pages. Read the stories aloud, sing the nursery rhymes. Your
child already loves your voice and will start to love the stories and
the songs even before he understands them, simply because it is time
spent together when he has your undivided attention.
i. Make reading a fun thing to do. Read together lying in bed, sitting
on an armchair, under a blanket with a torch, with actions, dramatic
enactment, and sound effects. Reading should never be associated
with monotony in the child’s mind. Before you know it, your child will
want to journey on his own into the world of books.
j. Discard books you both find boring. There are books aplenty in this
world and not enough time to read them all. You know your child best.
Read him the books he loves. Again and again if he so desires. As I said
before, children love repetition.
k. When reading aloud, stress the phonemic syllables so that the

children learn the sounds made by each letter—‘the songs the letters
sing’. If your child loves the sound of a word, encourage him to play ‘Make it a rule never to give
with the sounds and before you know, he will be making up nonsense a child a book you would not
words, rhyming words and learning to link the letter with the sound. read yourself.’
Reading will become both an adventure and a game. —George Bernard Shaw

52
‘There is no such l. Avoid books your child is not ready for. Find books which are just
thing as a child who right for your child’s age. Start with books that have attractive pictures
hates to read; there
are only children and just a few words on each page. Encourage him to repeat lines
who have not found which are often repeated. Pause at words you think he can manage or
the right book.’ guess at. The thrill of realising that he can actually read a word will spur
—Frank Serafini him on to a phrase, a sentence, a paragraph, a story, a whole book!
m. Get help. Never hesitate to ask other parents, teachers, and librarians
to figure out what kind of books your child might enjoy at any stage.
I still remember how my grandson who loved having books read to
him would not progress to reading whole books by himself till a friend
gave him one of the Jake series by Ken Spillman. At that time, it was
perfect for him. Not too long to be intimidating, fairly simple language
and above all, Jake was like him with experiences that he could relate
to easily: a boy writing out a long list of birthday presents he wanted,
learning to play football, terrified of performing in the school concert,
making a mess cleaning up his room….
n. Take turns reading. Take turns reading to break the monotony:

paragraph by paragraph or page by page. Gently help to piece
‘Tell me and I forget. Teach
me and I remember. Involve together the words he finds difficult. Show him how clusters of letters
me and I learn.’ work together to produce certain sounds. Phonological exercises help, as
—Benjamin Franklin mentioned in an earlier section. Applaud when he gets new words right.
53
o. Encourage your child to talk about what he/she has read.

Ask your child questions. Even better, let him ask the questions.
My grandson, who finds it difficult to concentrate on his lessons, loves
to be a teacher and ask me tough questions. In his attempt to ‘teach’
me he not only reads with concentration and comprehension, but also
with an excitement that comes from having a purpose. He loves to tell
me the right answer when I get it wrong! Do make it a point to get your
answers wrong sometimes. When his questions lack clarity, his doubts
are also revealed and I can start a dialogue to clarify that. We take
turns being teacher and student. It works like magic and improves his
quality of reading. Even as I was writing this paragraph, he telephoned
me from Mumbai to tell me that he is teaching his mother Marathi and
that she is ‘awful’ at it. ‘I’ve been teaching her for three hours,’ he says
indignantly but proudly: a boy who cannot concentrate on his studies
for more than forty-five minutes!
p. Enact and extend a story/information you have read. This is to take

the child beyond the words he has read. If you have read a piece on
an animal or a bird, show him pictures (on the Internet if he is old
enough); if it is a piece on plants, help him plant a seed and watch it
grow or collect different kinds of leaves; if it is Red Riding Hood you can
enact the grandma and he can be the big bad wolf. You can also ask
him what he would have done in that situation and you might find you
have a storyteller or a problem-solver in the making!
54
q. Don’t stop reading aloud because your child has learnt to read.
Make him read to you. It is time together and you can help him anchor
new vocabulary by using them in sentences throughout the day.
Let him show off the new words at the dinner table. I have found the
dinner table a great place for sharing, learning, and applauding.
r. Let your child be an author and illustrator. Children have wild

imaginations, uninhibited by notions of what is possible or politically
correct. Let them make up stories. You could be the enthralled
audience. Next you could write it down for your child and even print
it out on your computer along with his own illustrations. Imagine the
thrill of being an author at 4 or 5 years!
‘I have always s. Make your child a member of local libraries. It helps your child to
imagined that interact with other children who like to read books and gives him a
Paradise will be a
sense of belonging to a community. The silence of many people
kind of Library.’
reading in a library also invests reading with an aura of importance.
—Jorge Luis Borges
Children love to feel important and do what adults do. Soon your child
will discover what a magical place a library is!
55
‘Libraries allow children to ask questions about the world and find the
answers. And the wonderful thing is that once a child learns to use a
library, the doors to learning are always open,’ said Laura Bush. If your
child is to find his way to the library, you must make it your picnic place
and you must gift him the love of books and the ability to read.
Trust me when I say that if this happens, books will no longer be a

burden he carries during his school years but his preferred mode of
transport to worlds far more exciting!
56
‘Life, love, and Laughter is healthy

laughter—what
priceless gifts to give
our children.’
—Phyllis Dryden
I come back to end with a point I am obsessive about. Childhood should
be a time of laughter and joy and therefore a pre-primary school should
be filled with the sound of children laughing, talking, playing, and singing.
Science tells us that laughing releases endorphins, the good effects of
which reverberate in the body long after the sounds of laughter die down.
Laughter increases the blood flow, relieves stress, aids digestion, improves
health, reduces tension, lowers blood pressure, and wards off depression.
Believe me when I say that children experience all this and more. In
addition, says Donna Horne of the Washington State Family Child Care
Association, laughter ‘helps build self-esteem, connects kids with others,
and makes children healthier and more optimistic.’
Children love to laugh and are easily amused. Their sense of humour is
direct and straightforward. Any slapstick performance, exaggerated
grimace, even just the sound of someone else’s laughter can tickle
9 their funny bone. How much laughter has the macabre ‘Ring-a-Roses’
(supposedly about the bubonic plague) elicited from children over the
The years. They love the rhythm, the sounds, and the falling down!
importance
of laughter
57
When should you be concerned? ‘The most

important thing in
If your pre-primary school child is loaded with too much homework, if he communication is
is being forced to write pages when his hands are not yet ready to grip a to hear what isn’t
pencil correctly, if he no longer enjoys the thought of school and playing being said.’
with his friends, if the pre-school expects him to sit still for more than half —Peter F Drucker
an hour at a time, you have reason to be concerned.
Otherwise, parents should not interfere with the functioning of a school

for most pre-schools today use the play-way method and are very clear
about the learning objectives to be achieved. They do not seek to bring
‘For children play is as
kindergarten and first grade expectations into their pre-school curriculum. natural as breathing…and
The emphasis usually is on the joy of learning. as necessary.’
Pushing too hard can be counterproductive —Mimi Brodsky Chenfeld
Very often, if and when these ambitious expectations creep in, it is not
so much because of the school or its trained teachers but because of
pushy parents. Many parents, who do not recognise the importance of
play as a method of learning, nurse the notion that their child is not being
challenged enough in playschool.
As parents, we can help our children by learning to play and laugh together
at home. We can help by NOT enrolling our children in too many structured
activities outside the classroom. Parent and child need time together to
build those precious memories that will bind them and last more than a
lifetime.
58
Play—A child’s birthright

Instead of dragging unwilling children
to all kinds of special classes, invite a
school friend over. It is amazing how
much they can and will teach each
other in the course of an evening.
It is important to guard against the
tendency to fill a child’s spare time
completely with structured classes.
This often results in a child who
lacks the ability to play by himself or
use his imagination. He will always
expect someone else to teach and
entertain him! Let us not create young
Frankenstein monsters.
As I said before, joy is every child’s

birthright and we must try and ensure
‘What! Is it nothing to be
that he is not denied that right.
happy? Nothing to skip,
play and run around all
day long? Never in his life ‘Children need the freedom and time to play.
will he be so busy again.’ Play is not a luxury. Play is a necessity.’
—Jean-Jacques Rousseau —Kay Redfield Jamison
59
O nce the child has learnt to enjoy going to pre-primary school,

mastered some pre-reading and pre-writing activities, once he has
learnt to communicate with his peers and his teachers, he is ready for the
more structured environment of primary school where it is a different ball
game altogether. ‘First your parents,
they give you your life,
One last word but then they try to
give you their life.’
Primary school will whizz by and so will secondary school. Before you know
—Chuck Palahniuk
it, your child will be ready to take on the world, a world in which you are no
longer the centre and circumference of his life. This is as it should be. You
are still important to him, but more to provide love, support, and applause
in the background: someone he can take for granted because he knows he
can always count on you. He no longer needs to hold your hand, except
perhaps to steady your faltering step, help you up a difficult slope, or climb
a steep step!
10
Ready for
primary
school?
60
It is time now for your child to spread his wings and take to the skies. It is
time to let go...he must be free to live his own dreams. It is not fair to expect
him to live yours.
‘Parents are sometimes a bit of a disappointment to their children. They don’t

fulfill the promise of their early years.’
—Anthony Powell
Macmillan Publishers India Pvt. Ltd.

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Pages from Parent Manual JR KG.indd 1 26-02-2015 17:01:51

A n anxious mother once asked Aristotle, the philosopher, ‘When should I

‘How old is your child?’ asked the philosopher.

Never the same sense of urgency:

WE ARE THE CHILD’S FIRST TEACHERS ‘The beginning of

An infant’s needs are simple and straightforward, his demands direct.

Study the newborn

‘No significant Provide the right kind of stimuli

‘Each day of our lives we make deposits

The power to shape his/her mind ‘Any man can be

This is no idle statement. Until he goes to pre-primary school, we decide

‘The most important troubled by self-doubt.

2 ‘We may not be able to

But how do children learn?

Talk, sing, and read to your child

and relaxed experience with the family?

Everything is new to the child

Surround the child with colours

Basic shapes and the human body

The wonders of the world outside

Children love to imitate sounds and they start making connections

Introduce the child to people

Encourage the child to smile at others, especially children, and be sociable.

Encourage the child to touch and feel

As Keats says, ‘Touch has a memory’. It helps a child remember and

The ‘Don’t touch’ command should be

Emulation, repetition, applause ‘I can’t tell my

Learning is anchored by repetition and internalised

Always encourage and applaud

But most of all, we parents must

Each child is different

First step outside home

Pre- home, the first step he takes (in a sense)

school is known hitherto. This stepping out will

Foundation for a lifetime of learning ‘Little children, from the

Developing independence and discipline

journey to regular school.

In addition, trained teachers ensure age-appropriate pre-reading, pre-

Build a strong base for primary school education

Vimala Ramachandran also points out that in a country like India

‘If we are to teach real

Dress rehearsal for life

In a multicultural country like India, a pre-

Truly, as Maria Montessori said, ‘Preventing war is

In short, the pre-primary classroom is an indispensable dress rehearsal for

A crying need for trained teachers ‘No one should teach

I n India, you need a doctorate to teach in the University, a Masters or a

India needs to invest in training teachers to provide high quality early

Providing a sense of security

To optimise learning, a child must feel secure. This is made possible

Igniting interest ‘The important thing is

Observing, assessing, and recording

‘A teacher affects Ensuring safety

In short, the teacher has to be a facilitator, a coordinator, an organiser,

‘A teacher who is attempting to teach

Importance of choosing carefully ‘I happy am,

E very child is joy embodied till time and the world

experience of learning is a joyful one, unclouded

I am eternally grateful to the understanding teacher who let my daughter

Children were encouraged to see, judge, and reason for themselves.

We parents could complement

Children learn through play and when