How Much Freedom Should Parents Give to Their Children?

Jung jun Park 201921725

We were born and raised by our parents. That is how important parents are in our lives.

Obviously, parents continue to influence our entire lives. But there is a place where those effects

begin, and where our identity, in other words, is formed. It is infancy. During infancy, our bodies

grow steadily, our body proportions change, and our cerebrum, which performs higher mental

functions. But perhaps because of the overall growth, the children at this time are lovely to their

parents, but also scary. It is called a walking time bomb because you do not know when or where

they are going to crash. So a father or mother cannot help but follow him around and constrain

him. But if she is going to search her heart and realize the logic of the world, she cannot just tell

her not to do it. So the question is, how much freedom should we allow children?

I was able to think metaphorically about this question. It is a fence that's high, but It is got

to free the kids from boundary. And the fence should not interfere with the child's meeting with

others. And you should never physically overpower your child. This is what I think of as a fence

wall. There are three reasons why I think this way. Personality, physical development, and

independence. Firstly, let me talk about personality. What if parents interfere with their children's

friendship from infancy? I am sure children will be passive about making friends. And it is very

likely that they will not be able to build up their friendship properly when they grow up. As a result,

Parents should not force or engage their children deeply in their thoughts or beliefs. So parents

must acknowledge that there child are a person and respect their behavior and way of thinking

Secondly, Infancy is a very important time to form habits. There is also a lot of physical

development in this period. So, at this time, it is absolutely necessary to play in the natural
environment or outside to move the body. At this time, however, children need more care and

attention because they have more physical activity and more curiosity. A certain degree of vigilance

is necessary for this protection and attention. If children's activities are widened and inappropriate

boundaries are established at this time of the society's rules and values through interaction with

people, it can have serious side effects on the child. Therefore, I think that the right boundaries

gives freedom in the line of believing in the child. For example, it helps the child to recognize and

cope with situations in which various accidents can occur, and parents constantly monitor their

behavior. If you do this, your child will be able to take good physical development steps in a safe

situation. And they will be able to grow into a sound personality by fulfilling roles and

responsibilities as members of society.

Third, In counseling, there is a concept called "separation-individuation" in which infants

are separated from their mother's symbiotic relationship and secure an independent individuality.

This concept can be found in Mahler's subject relationship theory. The separation phase begins

around the age of five or six months and continues until the age of three or four. During this time,

infants begin their search for the outside world and expand their interest. Physical dependence on

the mother begins to decrease by the infant being separated from the mother, and distinguishes

itself from the mother's batter by observing and touching the mother's face or body. As peripheral

nervous systems like vision become more sophisticated and complex during this time, infants

experience separation from their mothers. For example, infants experience shyness for the first

time. As a child begins to explore the world and the search extends beyond his or her lips and

fingertips, he and her subjects become increasingly distinct. But what happens to children who

have been oppressed or neglected by their parents and have failed to make the right segregations?

They will certainly not be able to form accurate independence because the ongoing conflict

between their mother's needs and desire to separate themselves is worse than normal children.
 As I said at the beginning, it is the position that children should be given maximum

freedom. But the question that always comes up in this position is how much freedom should be

guaranteed. The answer to that question is always ready. First, do not confuse the education of

freedom and neglect. The concepts of "leave" and "let go" are certainly different. . I am in a position

to leave it to the child's choice. However, if the choice over step the line with the conventional

wisdom of society, we should correct the mistakes through proper education. In conclusion, control

and sanctions, of course, narrow the scope of children's thinking in the development process. And

you get scared of challenging something new. If so, they will not be able to develop a sense of

responsibility and independence, but rely on their parents for their decision-making. So in the end,

I think parents should wipe out the right line of freedom for their children to grow themselves.