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Kelly Duong

Professor Beadle

English 115

10 February 2019

Elevating Happiness

We are all chasing after this grand idea that we call “happiness,” but are we really doing

everything we can to be happy? While “happiness” is subjective and what makes someone happy

varies from person to person, there are crucial changes everyone can make to both one’s internal

and external space to achieve a higher level of happiness. David Brooks, an accredited journalist,

and Sonja Lyubomirsky, a Stanford graduate and psychology professor, focus on ways we can

transform our internal space, or mental states and perspectives to be happier. On the other hand,

Graham Hill, a “journalist, entrepreneur, and designer,” targets how we can change our external

environment to increase our happiness level. They discuss in their essays internal and external

changes that everyone can make to achieve a higher level of happiness, however, the one concept

overlapping across all three essays is the importance of interpersonal relationships.

In order to be happy, we first need to understand what makes us happy, and strangely

enough, this understanding comes from the opposite of happiness: our suffering. David Brooks

in the essay, “What Suffering Does,” argues that while everyone chases after happiness, the force

that really shapes their being and mental state is their suffering. He states that,“The theologist

Paul Tillich wrote that people who endure suffering… find they are not who they believed

themselves to be” (285). In other words, we learn more about ourselves through the suffering we

endure. He further explains with a metaphor comparing the human psyche to a multiple story
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building, or a mental “space,” that as we all endure higher levels of suffering, we break through

floors of this building, which leads us to understand ourselves at a deeper level (286). He

suggests that as we get to know ourselves better through suffering, we grow to understand our

own limitations. By understanding that we can’t control everything that happens around us, we

can learn to let go of things easier. This may also help decrease our stress levels, and keep us

from being too hard on ourselves. Simply coming to understand the abundance of contributions

suffering makes to our character and changing our perspective of it from a negative one to one of

appreciation can increase our happiness level. Brooks also discusses his concept of “holiness”

(286), which he explains as “...trying to redeem something bad by turning it into something

sacred” (286). One example he uses is of parents who create foundations for their past children

(286). He shows the good that can come from suffering. By seeing suffering in a different

perspective, as something that forms us, as something that we can grow from, and as something

we can repurpose to benefits those outside of ourselves, we can reach a new level of

understanding about ourselves. Understanding ourselves, is a critical step that leads us to

understand what makes us happy, and in return we can work towards it with more direction.

Sonja Lyubomirsky argues in her essay “How happy are you and why?” that whether we

are happy or not is completely up to us and the changes we make. She explains that people have

trouble attaining happiness because they’re searching for it in the materialistic world while in

fact, “The reason that it’s [happiness] not out there is that it’s inside us… happiness, more than

anything, is a state of mind… So, if you want to be happy tomorrow… you can do it by choosing

to change and manage your state of mind” (Lyubomirsky 185). Her argument can relate to the
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concept Brooks was trying to emphasize, just how important it is that we understand ourselves

on a deeper level, because it will allow us to have a better idea of what makes us happy.

Lyubomirsky further reinforces her argument when she states that,“50 percent of the differences

among our happiness levels is determined by set points [genetic predispositions] (and 10 percent,

let’s not forget, by circumstances), fully 40 percent is still available to us to mold” (Lyubomirsky

189). She supports her claim with multiple genetic case studies with both fraternal and identical

twins to prove that our genetics play a huge role in determining our happiness set points. While

our set points, or genetic predispositions do make up fifty percent of our happiness capacity,

whether it affects us negatively depends on if we let ourselves be exposed to an environment that

will activate those predispositions. By removing ourselves or limiting the amount of exposure we

have to stressful situations and stress in general, we can increase our happiness level. One of the

changes she suggests is that we teach ourselves to stop blaming our external environment and

circumstances for our unhappiness because they only make up ten percent of what influences our

happiness capacity. This also extends to the understanding that materialistic items will not

necessarily bring us extended amounts of happiness, and to stop blaming our lack of wealth for

our unhappiness. Overall, the main point she stresses in her essay is that happiness is a ​choice.​

By transforming our mental perspective from just accepting we are unhappy due to our happiness

set points and external circumstances, to taking action and working towards our happiness, we

can ultimately control our happiness level.

While Brooks and Lyubomirsky focus on how changing our internal spaces will increase

our level of happiness, Graham Hill discusses in his essay, ”Living with less. A lot less,” the
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effect of our external environment on our mental state and happiness level. Specifically, he

argues that by simplifying our external space to be easier to maintain in order to decrease our

stress levels and carbon footprint, it will ultimately increase happiness. Hill used to live a very

lavish and materialistic driven life before simplifying it after realising that his external wealth did

not bring him extended amounts of happiness. According to Lyubomirsky, his happiness did not

remain because “...people readily and rapidly adapt to positive circumstantial changes.” (195).

This observation shows and gives an explanation to why we rarely continue to be satisfied and

happy with our wealth. Hill himself is an example that supports Lyubomirsky’s argument that

only ten percent of happiness comes from our external circumstances. Hill also talked about how

stressful maintaining his lavish lifestyle was and how it was a hassle for him (309). He had

“lawns to mow, gutters to clear, floors to vacuum, roomates to manage” (309). Hence, a simpler,

less demanding lifestyle would mean less stress, minimal complications, and conclusively an

increase in one’s happiness and satisfaction. While Lyubomirsky argues that only ten percent of

our happiness is from our external circumstances, Hill discusses how the changes he made

externally h​ ave​ changed his mentality​ and made him happier. Living in a smaller space, and

owning less material items has heavily de-stressed his life, but another plus to living smaller is

minimizing one’s carbon footprint. According to “experts… consumerism and all that it

entails… plays a big part in pushing our planet to the brink” (Hill 310). Hill directly addressed

this issue and said,“I feel better that my carbon footprint is significantly smaller than in my

previous super-sized life” (Hill 311). In other words, according to Hill, wasting less resources

has a positive correlation with one’s happiness. Seeing Hill as an example of how minimal living

and accepting that external wealth does not bring extended periods of happiness, we learn that
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we can increase our individual happiness levels by living with less. To conclude, Hill suggests

simplifying space to be easier for the owner to maintain, which will decrease stress levels,

increase happiness levels, and cause less guilt about leaving a carbon footprint (Hill).

While all three authors argue about how we can increase our happiness level from

different aspects and angles, there is one constant idea emphasized between them: the importance

of relationships. Relationships between people can both increase one’s happiness and benefit

from suffering. In Lyubomirsky’s essay, she discusses an interview she conducted with a woman

named Angela and wrote, “Still, with all that has happened [verbal and physical child abuse from

mother, and a divorce] and all the challenges that have come to pass, Angela considers herself a

very happy person. Her daughter, Ella, to whom she is extremely close, brings her endless

joy”(180). It is her relationship with her daughter that makes her happy so she chooses to focus

her life around her. She is choosing her environment and choosing to control her happiness

through her relationship with her daughter. Hill gave a personal anecdote about how he fell in

love with a woman named Olga and that his relationship was what put his life into perspective

(311). He said, “...my life never looked the same. I live smaller and travel lighter. I have more

time and money…” (311). His relationship with Olga showed him that he does not need material

things to be happy because it was the relationship itself that made him happy. Brooks discusses

how “Often, physical or social suffering can give people an outsider’s perspective, an attuned

awareness of what other outsiders are enduring” (Brooks 284). He supports his claim with the

example of how “Franklin Roosevelt came back deeper and more sympathetic after being struck

with Polio”(284). When people are more empathetic, their relationships grow stronger as they

are able to put themselves in other’s shoes to relate and try to understand them better. Brooks
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also argues that suffering is all about encouraging connections with others when he says, “Even

while experiencing the worst and most lacerating consequences… They [people] hurl themselves

deeper and gratefully into their art, loved ones and commitments” (Brooks 287). Brooks

ultimately argues that suffering brings people together and strengthens relationships. Across all

three essays, it is stressed that happiness can be found in others, in building relationships, and

through how they form us.

From changing our mentality to appreciate suffering and learning to take more

responsibility over our happiness to minimizing our external material uses, we can all increase

our happiness levels. Brooks argues that happiness can be found through appreciation of our

suffering. On the other hand, Lyubomirsky argues that we choose if we are happy or not. They

argue the mental aspect of happiness while Hill discusses how “living with less” elevated his

happiness level. However, the one main constant that positively correlates with happiness is our

relationships to those around us. As Hill says, “Intuitively, we know that the best stuff in life

isn’t stuff at all, and that relationships, experiences, and meaningful work are the staples of a

happy life” (311) .

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Work Cited

Brooks, David. “What Suffering Does.” Pursuing Happiness, edited by Matthew Parfitt and

Dawn Skorczewski, Bedford St. Martin’s, 2016, pp. 284-287.

Hill, Graham. “Living With Les. A Lot Less.” Pursuing Happiness, edited by Matthew Parfitt

and Dawn Skorczewski, Bedford St. Martin’s, 2016, pp. 308-313.

Lyubomirsky, Sonja. “How Happy Are You and Why?” Pursuing Happiness, edited by Matthew

Parfitt and Dawn Skorczewski, Bedford St. Martin’s, 2016, pp. 179-197.