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Darius Clark

Mrs.Kenly

British Literature 4A

29 April 2019

There are standards of being a single parent! Single-parent households may have affected

children’s educational achievement at the population level. Single parenting can be a struggle but

does not have to be a burden. Single parenting can also come with a lot symptoms such as,

nightmares , headache, sleep disturbances and etc. Being a single parent can put stress on child in

many ways! Kentucky this year passed a law to make joint physical custody and equal parenting

time standard for temporary orders while a divorce is being finalized. Florida's legislature

overwhelmingly approved a bill last year to presume equal time for child custody plans, but it

was vetoed by the governor. And in Michigan, lawmakers are considering a bill that would make

equal parenting time the starting point for custody decisions.The legal push for custody

arrangements is in large part a result of years of lobbying by fathers' rights advocates who say

men feel alienated from their children and overburdened by child-support obligations. These

groups, including the National Parents Organization, are gaining new traction, with support from

across the political spectrum, as more lawmakers respond to this appeal for gender equality and,

among some conservatives, the frustration of a newly emboldened constituency of men who say

they are being shortchanged.Laws that require joint physical custody could also lead to the

elimination of child support in some states, women's advocates say, disrupting a system that was

designed to help women, who have historically been paid less in the workforce while performing

more unpaid labor at home. Proponents emphasize that the bills overwhelmingly address parents
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who are otherwise fit and not abusive. They say that family courts are out of step with modern

families and that the current system benefits highly paid lawyers while depriving millions of

children of the chance to build meaningful relationships with their fathers. For more than a

century, court decisions were guided by the "tender years doctrine," a vestige, legal scholars say,

of the cult of domesticity that put women on a pedestal as instinctive caregivers. A father who

wants custody of a child should continue to make regular child support payments. If a father has

an informal arrangement with the child’s mother, he should maintain records such as check

receipts or a written letter from the child’s mother as to the child support arrangements and

what's been given thus far. If a father is struggling with child support payments, request a modifi

but if a father is able to make the payments, he should ensure he has a good track record of

making payments. Sometimes when the other parent isn’t in the equation you can build a strong

bond with the child. A father may also stop by the child’s school and introduce himself to the

administration. A father should check on a child’s progress often and ensure the child knows that

he’s there to offer any assistance necessary. Every child should have some type of love and

caring in their life. When one of the spouts not in their can affect the child life in many ways.

Certain stuff you can learn from a men prospective that women can’t teach! Even if a father lives

in a small space, he should make a special place in his home for the child. A father who wants

custody of a child should realistically ask himself what he can handle. It's a fact that many

fathers may have other responsibilities such as other children or multiple jobs. Multiple

responsibilities may affect a father's ability to assume custody of a child, especially full custody.

There is usually only one hearing or trial in any case. That is when witnesses testify, and in a

custody case, is a protracted matter which may last anywhere from 3 or 4 to as much as ten days.

Not every family law judge will have the same level of family law experience, knowledge,
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temperament or patience. Remember that a judge is elected or appointed to the bench. They don’t

go through years of family law judge training before they become family law judges. Many of

the experienced ones learned on the job or used to practice family law. Some of them may have

never practiced family law a day in their career as a lawyer. Fortunately, in Orange County, we

are blessed with some very intelligent judges.

That's not a problem with the Census; its purpose is to quantify. The problem lies with

folks who use a simple measure of marital status and primary custody to draw sweeping

conclusions about family relationships, the people in them, and what it all means — and who

prescribe solutions for a social problem diagnosed using the wrong tools. The single-parent

households numbered by the census are just that: homes in which a presently unmarried parent

lives with a biological or adopted child of whom that person holds primary custody. Meanwhile,

some liberal critics see single mother as a codeword for "black, welfare mother." They view the

focus on out-of-wedlock births and family breakup as an effort to divert public attention and

social policy from overcoming racism and lack of opportunity. And then there are the feminists

who regard Quayle's attack on Murphy Brown as a symbolic attack on the moral right of women

to pursue careers and raise children on their own. So great are the passions aroused by the debate

over the morality of single motherhood that a clear-eyed view of the consequences of single

motherhood has been difficult. But to make any progress, we had best know what those are. If

you’re a parent, you may have seen your stress level in your child’s eyes, or perhaps you've seen

it played out in his or her behavior. If you’re not a parent, you may remember the feeling of

delight at your own parents’ happiness, or the devastation when you sensed that they were not

OK. Children are sponges, after all – and we all know this intuitively. And there’s a small but

intriguing body of evidence suggesting that beyond a child’s disposition, a parent’s stress level
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can affect a child’s very makeup, including his or her risk of mood disorders, addiction, and even

disorders like ADHD and autism. It’s not the most popular area of research, for obvious reasons,

but it’s well worth looking into.

How does being a single parent affect the household? Relationships are another thing

that everyone needs, especially children. Children need a real strong relationship between

themselves and their parents, but children from single parent families are usually denied this

privilege because they are separated from one of their parents and often do not get to spend

adequate time with the other. Children who have a strong relationship with their parents are more

likely to respect the authority of their parents.The problem with single parent is the fact that

usually the single parent does not have the time to help the child develop a close relationship

with them. Another problem is how a child can build a strong relationship with a parent they do

not live with and often do not see on a regular basis. The simple fact is that children need both of

their parents in the household to build a close relationship with and to teach them to respect the

parent’s authority. True, not all children from two parent households have close relationships

with their parents, but it is much more likely. Gender also plays an important role in families.

Men and women have very different characteristics, both emotionally and physically. These

different characteristics contribute to their roles as mothers and fathers . For instance, men are

normally much stronger physically than women, and are therefore able to do many things around

the house that a woman cannot. Women are much more likely to do the everyday household

chores while the man does the heavy duty work. Women usually tend more to the children when

they need things than do the men, and also help them more with emotional type problems. So it

is easy to see why having both parents in the household makes a much more well-rounded family

atmosphere.
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When both parents are not in the household children after experience a great deal of stress from

different aspects of their lives. This stress often comes from children who are forced into

independence and self-reliance before they are mature enough to cope. Many single parents leave

their children at home or send them to low quality daycares centers while they are at work,

causing lots of stress on the children. Yes, two parent families often leave their children at

home or send them to low quality daycares, but studies show that it is ten times more likely to

happen in single parent families. Another time which brings a great deal of stress to single parent

homes is the holidays. The holidays are a time when families should be together. Single parents

may not be able to provide this for their children. Another problem that arises during the holidays

is that of gift competition between the parents. The problem with the parents competing over

who gets the best gift is the fact that the children often feel as if the parents want to but their love

instead of earning it by showing them love. Children of single parent homes also face stress by

always worrying about everything that is going on in their lives. According to Richard Kinsey

single parent children worried more about school, family, future, finding work, crime, and their

environment by a large margin . However, the biggest worry of these children was about their

own personal loves and what was going to happen to them as they grew up. Another big stress for

single mothers is the fact that now they have the responsibility of two parents. One woman

describes how she felt: “And on the weekends then, mow the yard, and clean the house, and

wash the clothes. When you get done doing that, its Monday all over again. Most parents form

two parent homes realize the responsibility they have and the stress that they face with a spouse

there to support them, but just imagine that spouse not being there to help support and help with

the responsibilities of the family and that is exactly what it is like to be a single parent.

Now we have seen the pressures that single mothers face, but what about single fathers
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because there are many of them in the world today. One example can be found in the article ” A

Singular Experience,” by Brad Andrews. Andrews himself is a single father and he discusses the

overwhelming responsibilities of being a single father. He now has to do all of the household

chores and take care of the children all by himself. He can no longer play catch with his son after

dinner because now he has to do the dishes (8). These single parent situations create instability

and do not provide a positive environment for children to grow up in. Both a father and a mother

are needed to create a stable environment and a positive place from children to live. The simple

fact is that being a single parent is a very difficult task, whether it is a single father or a single

mother. A family consists of a father and a mother with their children, not just one parent. Single

parent homes create a lot of stress and worries on the parent as well as the children, and the stress

and worries are not needed by either. After all, it takes two to make a child; it should take two to

raise a child.

On that note, how can you be a success single parent? There are plenty of ways

you can be one. You & your children need and deserve a warm circle of loving supportive people

on whom you can count support, laughter and shared memories. Sometimes when it’s just you &

your child, yall can built a strong bond. Where to the child can feel comfortable around you

anytime. As a single you should know what you can afford & what you can’t afford. In the years

I’ve blogged at WealthySingleMommy.com, I’ve received thousands of questions from women at

every stage of their single-parent journey. Range from anything like dating and parenting to sex

and legal issues. But by far, the number one concern for new and existing single moms is money.

How to make more, save more, pay off debt and plan for the future. I’m thrilled that these

questions are being asked.

A solid financial plan and action toward reaching your money goals are so, so critical to
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your own well-being and that of your family. Don’t let anyone tell you differently. While money

can’t buy happiness, a lack of money or mismanaged financial decisions causes stress, anxiety

and limited choices — all realities that affect your ability to be the best woman, professional and

mom you can be. Whether single motherhood found you via divorce, unplanned pregnancy,

choice or widowhood, it can be easy to find yourself looking around at those two-parent families

at parent-teacher night and feeling pressured to take on a particular lifestyle.

Maybe you can already afford a sprawling Tudor in an affluent neighborhood, Caribbean

resort vacations, and expensive summer camps. Or, maybe your goals include affording those

things in the future.

But if you cannot afford your lifestyle, decide right now to change your spending.

Successful single moms do not replicate their nuclear-family neighbors’ lives. They build their

own amazing lives, on their own terms — within their own means.

If you have to finance it, you likely can’t afford it. This definitely includes expenses like

food and utilities, as well as clothes, electronics, and travel. A car and student loans fall into the

category of, “If the terms are attractive and there is a clear return on the investment, proceed”

category, as does a home mortgage (home ownership is not always the best choice for everyone

at every phase of life). The less you owe to other people, the easier it is to build wealth and reach

your goal.

Last but not least, Always wanna set big goals as a single parent. Go big on big! What

you mean about big on big? Basically I mean you should set bigger goals than the last one. Go

beyond on your goals. If you’re struggling or comparing yourself to your neighbors and friends

who seem to be doing better than you financially, it can be easy to fall into the pattern of setting
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small and short-term goals: pay off a credit card, or have a little extra at the end of the month.

But here’s the thing with goals (and really all of these fundamentals): if you are the least

bit diligent, you’re more likely to achieve them. So set big goals. Big, scary, hairy, glorious

goals. Dream of your perfect career or your perfect home and then sketch out the steps to achieve

them on a goal list.

Whatever your goals may be, I urge you to take it even a step further. I’ve seen thousands

of single moms blow their own minds and the expectations of others with what they can achieve

in this new, free phase of life. This can be you, too. Don’t hold back. Keep a minimum of three

months’ living expenses on hand. We all experience a large, unplanned expense at some point.

You could experience a job loss, medical emergency or sudden major expense like a car repair.

At the same time, get serious about your retirement planning. Take advantage of any investment

benefits offered by your employer, and seek professional advice about investment strategies that

can help you reach your goals. Since you don’t have a spouse, the pressure to save is that much

more important, if you don’t want to be a burden on your adult children in the future.

At this time, I wasn’t enjoying my consulting work as much anymore. I didn’t feel challenged,

and I started to question where I could go and where I wanted to take my career. The logistics of

my life were a struggle and my stress levels were through the roof.

I felt on the verge of a break down. Even getting to work was stressful. A tantrum from

my daughter (or one of her giant weet-bix sneezes) could put my whole morning off, and result

in me being half an hour late to work, which increased my stress. And if my daughter was sick,

I’d feel guilty for working from home. I was always the last one in the office and the first to

leave, despite being in the office for the official working hours. I felt an immense amount of
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stress from that. At the same time I was always one of the first to drop my daughter off at

daycare and one of the last to pick her up. I constantly felt guilty. Guilty for not being there for

my daughter, and guilty for my shorter working hours, compared to my colleagues. I thought,

there HAS to be a better way. After struggling on for a few months, my position was made

redundant. It was scary and a huge shock, but it was also a blessing because it forced me to look

at my life and re-examine my goals. I thought, This is my chance to mould my life to how I want

to live it, life is too short to feel constantly stressed and tired. So I didn’t even look for another

job. I thought, Single Mother Survival Guide is my passion, and I’m going to turn it into a

business. So that’s what my goal shifted to, and that what I did.

I wanted to create a business in something that I was passionate about and something that

enabled me to help others. I wanted to be able to work for myself. I wanted to action my ideas. I

really disliked the whole 9am – 5pm working hours. It didn’t suit my lifestyle, especially as a

single mother. I wanted to work the hours that suited me and not when a building happened to be

unlocked. I wanted to be able to work around being a mum. I wanted to be able to drop my

daughter off and pick her up from school, and be involved in the school community when she

starts school next year. I want to go to the parades and performances and afternoon teas. These

were my ‘whys’. A single parent is a person who lives with a child or children and who does not

have a wife, husband or live-in partner. ... Reasons for becoming a single include divorce, break-

up, abandonment, death of the other parent childbirth by a single woman or single-person

adoption. Single parenting can be hard but only strong can survive.
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