SIBC Notebook PDF

SI Boot Camp™ Training
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SI Boot Camp Schedule
Day 1:
8:30-10:15
Intro
Silent Coaching (Page 17)
Fortunately / Unfortunately (Page 18)
SI Magic Three (Page 13)
10:30-12:30
Life Story / Zones Strategy (Page 33)
Demo Session
Practice Sessions
Q&A
12:30-1:45
Lunch
1:45-3:00
Speed Coaching (Page 39)
Q&A
3:15-6:00
6 SI Success Zones Strategy (Page 44)
Demo Session
Practice Session
Q&A
Day 2:
8:30-10:00
21 Journeys (Page 54)
10:15-12:30
Metaphor Strategy (Page 56)
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Demo
Practice
Q&A
12:30-2
Lunch
2:00-2:45
Mode of Being Demo Group (Page 59)
2:45-3:30
Practice in Small Groups
3:30-6:00
Emotional Maturity Strategy Demo (Page 89)
Q&A
Practice Sessions
Day 3:
8:30-12:30
Prep for Archetype (Page 74)
Demo
Practice
Q&A
12:30-1:45
Lunch
1:45-4:00
Expanding the Unit (Page 70)
Six Human Needs (Page 64)
Demo
Practice
4:00-6:00
Coach Business Plan
Demo
Q&A
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Day 4:
8:30-9:30
Graduation Ceremony
9:30-11:30
The Four P’s Strategy (Page 83)
Demo
Practice
11:30-12:30
Q&A
12:30-1:45
Lunch
1:45-4:00
Coaching 360 (Page 85)
Demo
Practice
Q&A
4:00-5:00
Certificates and Pictures
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Strategies Index
21 Journeys™ 54
Action Forms 124
 Archetype Strategy 74
Being Your Own Best Friend 98
Client Welcome Kit 117
Coaching 360 Strategy 85
Emotional Maturity Strategy Six Steps 89
Emotional Strategies 92
Energy Repair for the Coach 99
Enrollment Conversation 112
Expand the Unit 70
Human Needs Strategy 64
Key Decisions Strategy 87
Life Focus 30
Life Story Strategy 33
Life Zones 33
 Metaphor Strategy 56
Mode of Being Strategy 59
Overcoming Negative Patterns 101
Pretend Strategy 96
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Silent Coaching and Fortunately 20
Success Zones Strategy 44
The Four P’s Strategy 83
Using Stories In Coaching 102
Your Coaching Message 111
Your Coaching Practice Session Plan 104
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SI Key Words, Concepts, Strategies
Archetype Strategy 
Awareness 
Being Your Own Best Friend  
Boundaries (Emotion, Energy)  
Brainstorming
 Client Mind and Coach Mind
Client Welcome Kit with Forms
Coaching  360 Strategy 
Coaching Message 
Coaching Package Plan 
Crazy Eight Concept 
Directive 
Energy Repair 
Enrollment Conversation  
Expanding The Unit
 Finding The Spark  
Fortunately/Unfortunately 
Getting Closer Strategy (Emotion)  
Getting Resourceful (Emotion)  
Getting Universal (Emotion)  Goals
External Goals
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Internal  Goals
Relational  Goals vs. Problems 
Higher Consciousness Healing
Integration 
Key Decision
 Key People
 Life Perspective Visualization
 Life Stage Problem
 Life Stage Reframe
Life Story Strategy
Life Zones (First Sessions)  
Metaphor 
Mode of Being 
Moving Over
Note Taking 
Offer/Block
 Outline for Coaching Session: Likes, What’s Missing, Getting

Resourceful, New, Action 
Parts of Self
 Pearl Formula Strategy
Presenting Problem 
Pretend Strategy 
Prioritization in Coaching
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Problems Based in Future
 Problems Based in Past 
Rapport
 Reframing
Research Project 
Reverse Engineering Strategy 
Safe Problems 
Secondary Gain 
Situational and Structural Goals 
Six Human Needs Strategy 
Six Steps Emotional Maturity Strategy 
Story Strategy 
Strengths Process 
Success Zones 
Systemic Problem 
The Four P’s Strategy (Emotion) 
Twenty-One Journeys 
Type of Client: Earth, Air, Fire and Water 
Types of Planning
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The SI Magic Three
Elevation- When elevating the client, point out the good, make the
client feel cared for, create rapport, interrupt negative pattern, and
give purpose and meaning to challenge client’s state or perspective
when needed.
Reframe- Use the following concepts and strategies to reframe a

client’s challenge, relationship, mode of being, fears, or negative view
of self: 
Six Human Needs
 Life Stages
Key Decisions 
Client Types (Air, Earth, Water, Fire)  
Story
Metaphor- Listen to client’s natural metaphorical language. You are

watching out for picture words that carry big meanings. Coach may
elevate a metaphor, invite client to recreate metaphors, or place
metaphors in stories. Sessions focus on creating a metaphorical
solution.
Rapport In Your Coaching Sessions

Body language
Matching speed of talking
Noticing where the client is looking
Body position mirroring
Energy and mood synchronization
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The Tools of SI Coaching
Understanding: Learning about the client, their family, needs,
goals, strengths. Experiencing: Creating a new state, discovering a
belief or value, taking actions through communications and activities
that create shifts and opportunities in the client.
Directives: Actions taken both internally and externally outside of

the coaching session. Education: offering a new concept, strategy,
or exercise to create a new level of experience, make a decision,
condition a new pattern, create an “aha” moment of insight.
Coach Knowing: Sometimes the coach uses the strategies and

skills / concepts of SI to understand and plan for future growth and
sessions with the client. Examples of this are: The problem is related
to a life stage, the client is trying to meet x need, this goal is an
outward not an inward goal.
Client Knowing: the client finds that they have the answer to their
challenge. This comes about from strategies, directives, and
education but this doesn’t always occur in the session. Often time the
client realizes what they should do or makes a decision well after the
session.
Strategies which support Client Knowing: paradox, pretend, and

research project.   
Getting Closer: Helping the client to move closer to their difficulty

and through experiencing the problem the problem begins to
transform.
Holding the Space: A client comes to coaching with their own real
needs for transformation. When the coach understands this and holds
the space of transformation, discovery, and realization the client does
the work.
Strategic Intervention is multi-faceted. On one hand, you can

intervene: react to urgent needs and situations, troubleshoot and
create solutions. On the other hand, you can educate: guide your
client through a sequence of concepts, experiences and strategies to
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gain new perspective and new action.
This means you're not "waiting" for the client to have a problem - this
was the problem with old-style therapy. The client lay back on the
couch and anything they could think of (dreams, emotions, memories,
experiences) became a problem.
Example: Client Knowing: You have a client who has never made
big decisions in her life. You might give her the paradoxical Strategy
of giving her husband control over all her decisions for one week.
This will enable her to “see” that she cares more about her
independence than she had said.
A coaching relationship has to "breathe." It needs your guidance so

that you're leading the client closer to what they want, but on the
other hand, if you try to lock your client into a tight 10 session plan,
they may feel too constrained. So we'll present you with session
plans, but this is a guideline, not an agenda. If the client needs to
take a session for a new reason, you can "bump" your planned
session, skip it, or change the plan at any time.
Real Success happens outside of the coaching session in the

client’s regular life.
Clients who wish to only do their strategies inside the session can still
receive enormous benefit from their SI Coaching.
Think outside the box: Be prepared to step outside of the

conventional relationship to create a new dynamic with your client. A
coach is not constrained and can find all manner of solutions. Take a
walk with your client, help your client do research, make a difficult
phone call, combine healing energy work with SI, combine exercise
coaching with SI, Art lessons with SI, and so on.
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Types of Coach Listening
Listening as healing experience (knowing that there are no mistakes
to sharing and that client’s experience is valuable and informative).
Listening with curiosity (belief that everything is important that client

wants to convey).
Listening with intuitive engagement (open to what you may hear that
isn’t said and you will ask about later).
If it becomes difficult to stay attentive try checking in with your body to

bring you fully present.
Listening with joy and presence gives client the feedback that
whatever they share with you is valuable and that you are there to
support them not to judge them.
Types of Regular Conversational

Listening that are not Coach Listening
Listening with the purpose to be able to speak
Listening while criticizing the style or content of the others

communication
SI Listening
Some helping practitioners have the habit of interrupting friends and
clients to instruct on how to say things in a more positive or powerful
way. This breaks presence and rapport with many clients.
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Exercise 1 Silent Coaching
Silent coaching – the client and coach have the conversation with
both in silence
The purpose of the exercise is to become skillful in your expressions,

body language and listening skills. 
1. Listen deeply and be aware of expressions as client shares with

you. 
2. Use powerful body language to engage rapport with client.
3. As you silently ask questions check in with your whole body to

experience your curiosity.
Notes on the experience of silent coaching:
Inner Dynamics Within the Client’s Experience

Much of the healing, realization and breakthroughs which occur
inside a client as a direct or indirect result of your coaching... you will
not know about.
Take a moment to appreciate the beautiful uncertainty you can

embrace as an SI Coach. You can plant seeds through stories,
observations, elevating remarks, reframing suggestions. You won’t
always know whether your client will run with these suggestions in his
or her life outside of the session.
Much of our work is in the realm of belief and hope. We do our best to
give and create a network of paths and experiences which our clients
will then use in their relationships, choices and life experience. We do
not get to control, see, or know all the ways that our SI Coaching
work will benefit our clients.
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Fortunately/Unfortunately  
Practice Your Elevation Skills
State/Vision 
Exercise: Unfortunately/Fortunately Helps coach to enter the flexible,
reframing, and creative mindset.
When practiced with clients, this increases flexibility, perspective, and

changes state. Great pattern interruption. When the client plays the
“fortunately” and you are the “unfortunately” it helps to elevate the
client as a problem solver and creates an empowering perspective.
This strategy is very helpful for parents of teenagers, teenagers and

children. This can also be played as a family to create greater
understanding of communication dynamics.
Notes on Fortunately/Unfortunately
How did I feel as Fortunately?
How did I feel as Unfortunately?
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Keys to First Sessions
Type of Support in First Three Sessions
• Elevation 
Expansion Process (moving from small view to large view and visa
versa)
• Compelling Future and Reframe (life stage issue, transition,

sadness, relationship challenge)
• Prioritization (busy people often need help with life zones

challenges: they may be a leader, have family needs, work
pressures, community obligations)
• How is the client creating/enjoying meaning in their life) 
• Expanding the unit (who are the key relationships in their life)
• Understanding the Success Zones (helpful for understanding their

areas of growth)
• Life Story Strategy 
• Using Metaphors and pretend 
• Taking small actions to create change (Directives) 
• Finding the Purpose/mission beneath a complaint or desire
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Outline for SI Coaching Session
  S tep 1: Likes. Find out what client likes to do.
Find out what a client likes to do. Many clients have not ever been
encouraged and supported in clarifying what they really like in life –
and so this is a key way to support your client in creating goals that
move them forward in their life.
Get very clear on details that they like about a specific activity. When
you understand the details then you can help client to feel more of
that in other activities or parts of life. (Life Zones, Six Human
Needs, Mode of Being, Archetypes)
Learn what a client likes about a key person (expanding the unit).
Especially after a difficulty has been shared ask for the parts of the
person or relationship the client likes. 
Find out what parts of life a client likes, how they like to feel, what
they like to do, what they used to like to do. (Success Zones, Life
Stages, Key Decisions)
Step 2: What’s missing

In order to feel more, do more of what the client likes what is missing
from their attitude, practical life, relationships, when in the past did
they engage more in their likes? Is finding likes difficult for client?
Step 3: Get Resourceful

What would be different if you had these resources that were
discovered in what is missing? (Brainstorming, relaxed state,
connection to deeper self, key people, key decisions, life stage,
human needs, find the spark)
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Step 4: What is new now?
Ask your client to explore how things are different or new after they’ve
uncovered what they like, what is missing and have become
resourceful.
Step 5: Taking Action

Ask your client to take an action that supports their new
resourcefulness and creates an immediate supporting outcome for
what is now new.
Power Words/Expressions Spoken By Client

Metaphors
“I feel like I’m pushing a rock uphill.”
Key people
“My sister is a huge support to me. My sister lives nearby. My sister

tells me...”
Values
“What gets to me is his lack of consideration. I am always very aware

of others state of mind. He never wants to listen.”
Mode of being
“I thought I’d be a family person. I really care for others and work on
making them comfortable. Everyone talks to me and confides in me.”
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Example of Note-Taking
Key Words Coaches Strategies Strategies

Relationship Observations & Concepts & HW
Sad I never feel Six Human Research

Wants good in the Needs Project
Purpose morning, I want Four P’s Journal
Better Diet to exercise
More Sleep more, I’m
slushy and slow
before noon.
Coach may
observe: needs
a supportive
ritual for
exercising.
What is holding
them back?
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First Session Notes: Demonstration
While you go through this demonstration coaching session, look for
key words you notice, questions you have, observations on rapport,
curiosity you feel, opportunities for elevation, reframes that could be
used.
Take notes as if you were the coach:
Client’s Key
Coaches Strategies
Words Directives
Observations & Topics
Relationship
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Types of Clients
After your First Session, use Client Types to explore what type of
coach you are and what type of client you worked with:
Fire, Air, Earth, or Water Answer:
What type of client (or type of goal) is easiest for you to work with?
Answer:
How does your life experience help you as a coach? Answer:
How could you explain your style and strengths to a friend? Answer:
Was there a part of the session where you felt uneasy and would like
more practice? Answer:
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First Sessions: Types of Clients
Fire- Fast Changer 
Strengths: focus, vision, urgency
Weakness: irritated, impatient, changeable
Earth- Tends to be a slow changer

Strengths: connected, loving, responsible,
Weakness: stubborn, may struggle with imagining a better or different
future, may only be seeing a situation from their perspective.
Air- Fast Changer (Also fast to quit and change back) 

Strengths: Big picture thinking, idea flow, many interests, goes in
many directions
Weakness: Overwhelm, follow through, deepening of relationships
can be a challenge and may have so many interests that focus is
challenging.
Water- Could be either fast or slow changer (or is used to going with
the flow)
Strengths: flexible, sees and understands multiple perspective, feels
and experiences their life and emotions. 
Weakness: feels out of control of emotions at times, becomes
trapped in triangles, has a hard time prioritizing, feels other’s needs
more than their own.
Client Mind vs. Coach Mind

Coaches want: to know what you’re going to work on to bring value to
the client and demonstrate to yourself that you’re doing a good job.
Coach mistake: Coach tries to “Earn fee in criticism,” rushing

change before having earned trust, expecting to dazzle the client and
see dramatic emotional breakthroughs. Coach may think they need to
point out their skills, knowledge, success. However, this takes away
from client’s own sense of discovery and success.
Clients wants: Someone they can trust with their personal

information, who can advocate for them, and offer strategies & insight
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for change.
What Coach is Doing: You are planting seeds. Much of their

progress will take place in between sessions. Don’t look for instant
results – look at building a relationship of discovery. Useful goals for
your first session: I want the client to feel understood, to feel good
about what they told me during the session, and to trust that I can
listen, make helpful suggestions, and look for more information.
Client often worries: Will the coach like me? Are my types
of goals or problems appropriate for coaching? Will the
coach think I’m strange, bad, needy? Will I be judged for
telling my truth?
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Four Coaching Baskets
Basket 1: Exploration
Understanding and Planning
When creating a vision for future sessions, getting to know a new

client in the first session. The coach and client are learning together
about different parts of client’s life.
They are exploring:
Life Zones & goals 

Key People: present and past and future 
What wants to be added 
What wants to be taken out 
Patterns regarding timing, procrastination, energy
Emotions and states 
Modes of Being 
Client Types: Air, Earth, Fire, Water
 Types of Communicators: Dog, Grasshopper, Turtle, Ram
Six Human Needs 
Values 
Strengths 
Success Zones
These sessions give a wide perspective of what is possible to explore

and enhance in the coaching program.
A coach may want to make an outline for themselves based on the

first 2-3 sessions of exploration.
Basket 2: Imagine
Resourcing & Pretend
Many of the tools you have as a coach are in the creative realm of
pretend strategies. The client can implement these tools right in the
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session and follow up with homework.
Pretend strategies allow for practice and create a new level of control
and ease in a person’s day to day life.
Coaching 360 
Daily tea with an emotion (exact amount of time spent with an
emotion)
The Four P's
 21 Journeys 3 minute imagination experiences 
Dream Day 
Fairy Godparent 
Remembering details of something we enjoy doing and re
experiencing it
Resourcing by imagining a safe place we love in nature 
Archetype Strategy 
Emotional Maturity Strategies
Getting Closer
 Getting Universal 
Bubble Boundary Practice
Equanimity Practice (21 J)
Three New Thoughts
Basket 3: Action
Accountability & Brainstorming
Finding the action steps, emotional states and smallest beginning

points for creating what client wants more of.
Exercise to understand how different actions can be when done with

a particular emotion or value. Ex. Glimpse practice of 10 things you
do in morning through the lens of an emotion or value you want to live
through.
Creating new patterns that client will begin to use daily or weekly. 
Understanding and honoring timing that works for client. Swallow the
Frog strategy.
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Self care rituals 
Creativity practices 
Dating in a couple 
Conversations to have with key people (may want to practice
communication strategies before hand. Or have session on
understanding commonalities, needs, values, and priorities of key
people)
Things to do in their life that support an emotional, or worldly goal.
Ex. Calling potential clients, business colleagues, friends.
Basket 4: Including
Expanding the Unit
Adding in more people/relationships into client’s life. Improving

current relationships. Healing thoughts and emotions around past
relationships.
Dream Day- Including others

 Understanding Needs of others and how to serve those needs 
Finding activities, conversations, and states which benefit a
relationship
 Modes of Being in relation to others 
Key Decisions and remaking key decisions regarding other people or
one’s attitude toward others 
Examining Beliefs related to self or someone else 
Becoming one’s own best friend 
Universal love and caring 
Boundaries that serve
 Saying no with love 
Relationship to higher power, universe
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Life Focus Discovery Session
The purpose of this session is to understand the client’s life as much
as possible. The client will be choosing areas to focus on during
sessions. This will help the coach and client target areas for adding
into the client’s life activities, relationships, actions and
understanding.
You can ask the client to choose a number between 1 and 5 for each
area of life, one representing the least satisfaction and five
representing the greatest satisfaction. You can then ask the client to
circle four areas of life which they would most like to improve through
coaching. Let the client know that sometimes a session or week will
focus only on this one area and other times you may be covering
several areas.
Together you will be understanding the skills, actions, and tools the
client needs to make each area of focus a four or five level of
satisfaction. Some clients will want great balance in life and some
clients will want to put everything into just a few areas of life. It is not
our job to convince a client to change this preference. Most of the
time there is a natural evolution which occurs as a person finds they
can create greater satisfaction in several areas of life. They feel the
drive to spread their success into more challenging areas of life.
Environment 
Social Life
  P ersonal
Growth
Activities
Spiritual Development
Career
Purpose 
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Family 
Friends 
Community 
Finances 
Romance
Intimacy
Health 
Self-Care 
Hobbies
  I nterests 
Social Life
  P ersonal Growth Activities  
Spiritual Development
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Notes on Life Focus Discovery 
Key Words Observations Strategy Directives
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Life Zones Strategy
Life Story Session combined with Life Zones and

Goal Setting
Clients’ begin by having a conversation where you and client are
learning about the clients Life Zones. Life Zones are areas of life. For
example: a client may have an area of life that is focused on their
growth, interest, or a hobby. Some usual areas are family, work,
home, exercise, health, friends, social, travel, spiritual. What is most
important is that you are using the client’s words to create these
categories. Then ask about what the client would like more of in each
area. Is there any goal they’d like to start working towards? Explain
that a goal may be inner (understanding, expressing, forgiving,
expanding…) or a goal may be outer (running a marathon, spending
less money, making money, saying loving things…)
Life Story Exercise
1. This is an experiential exercise that is wonderful to use in

sessions 1-3 or any time when you feel that you and your client
need to quickly gather more information about the client’s
history and focus.
2. Ask your client if they would like to do a fun exercise which

covers a lot of information in a very fast and effective way.
3. Ask them to stand for the exercise. You should stand too.
4. Explain this whole exercise (which only takes ten minutes total).
5. Here’s what to say: “First, I’d like you to tell me all about your
life, from the time you were born until the present moment, and
tell me all that in 3 minutes. I will time you. Do whatever you
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need to do to go quickly. There is no right or wrong, so just go
with whatever comes to.” Then, say “go” and time them for 3
minutes. Congratulate them on their great work. You can take
notes while they talk, but also give them your encouraging
energy.
6. Next say, “Excellent, now let’s do this again in 2 minutes, telling

me whatever comes to mind about your life story from birth to
now. Ready, set go.” Time them for 2 minutes.
7. Say: “Now, I’d like you to do that again, but from the current
moment back telling the story backwards to the day you were
born. We will take 3 minutes. Go.” Time them 3 minutes.
8. Say: “Fantastic, now let’s go back to telling me about your life

story forwards, from birth to right now, but we will only take 1
minute to do that. Ready, go.” Time them for 1 minute.
9. You can use variations on this exercise. This exercise can be

intensified by asking your client to stand on one foot or snap
their fingers as they tell their life story.  
10. After they are done with the process, take time to digest the
experience. This is a perfect moment to find out more about key
elements, people, life stages that they shared with you. Ask
them about how they feel after doing this exercise. Express
understanding of how challenging this is and how you felt when
you experienced the exercise.
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Life Story Strategy  
Hints to look for while you observe
Look for client’s pacing and body language, tone of voice, anxiety
level, and “aha” moments.
How does the coach communicate nonverbally?
Elevation happening?
Understanding?
Curiosity?
Focus on one time in life?
Something left out?
Does life story change as they repeat it?
Are new key people added in on different stories?
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Notes On Life Story Exercise
Strategies
Key Words Observations Directives
& Topics
36
Life Perspective Visualization Strategy
When a client seems stuck in a past trauma or life stage this
visualization may help them to gain perspective.
Ask client to imagine they are on a mountain top. Looking below left
they see their life path which brought them to this place in life.
Looking below to the right they see future paths and roads which will
take them in different directions.
Ask client to share with you each step of the way what stands out for
them that came before and what will come ahead.
You lead the client and should let them know that you may ask them
to quickly zoom out in perspective or get closer. They do not need to
see things like a movie and can simply use words to create their
visualization.
You may also want to do some resourcing before the visualization of

a safe and comforting place in nature they can always return to. This
may be with them at the top of the mountain.
This strategy is for mature, stable clients who are not made anxious
by visualization or thoughts about the past or future.
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Notes On Life Perspective Exercise
Strategies
& Topics
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Speed Coaching
You will experience being coached by five to seven different coaches
for three to five minutes and also coaching five to seven clients for
three to five minutes.
Directions:  
Get right to the heart of your questions of the client. As a client, be

honest and open.  
Remember: there is no time to waste. Develop Rapport quickly.  
Try asking the same questions to different people. Follow your gut on
what to talk about.
Speed Coaching Notes

General emotional state after the session:
My personal take-away after being coached by five coaches was:
I noticed my comfort zone was challenged when I asked or was

asked this type of question:
Next time I do this I would like to ask more of this type of question:
Do I have a new appreciation of coaching after being coached or

coaching so many times in a row?
Prioritization in Coaching
• Outcome- Most people are not very articulate about what is
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bothering them - it's a feeling. Just like chiropractic patients can
report leg pain that is actually a back problem, clients often complain
about a symptom rather than the originating source. Therefore, we
must prioritize.
• In any system, there is only one bottleneck or constraint, just as in a

stream, there is only one point that is constricting the flow most. In a
factory assembly line, there is one constraint at a time that is slowing
down production. Once you fix that point - a new constraint shows up.
So you are always looking for the most urgent issue that is preventing
other solutions from taking place.
• If the problem that is brought up focuses on another person’s

actions or thoughts then search for the client’s actions,
interpretations, intentions, and find new ways to see the “problem”
person. Help the client learn to activate the other person to highlight
the parts they love about them or what they share.
When coaching you can ask yourself: What is the most urgent and
serious problem I've heard about? What do they seem to really want,
and what's holding them back? How can the client and I discover a
skill or action that will support them in doing what they want to do?
EXAMPLES: 
Situation: Husband is cold and aloof towards his wife
Questions: Where is this coming from? What are his parents like? Are
there cultural differences? What are his rules for being together?
What are his expectations from home life, from himself, from his
work?
Situation: Adult siblings don't get along
Questions: What is the family culture and relationship to the parents?

Has this always been the case or is it recent? Were there any
significant events that shifted the relationship? Was there an injustice
or unfairness to one or both? Was there a disagreement about the
parents? What are the life stages of the respective siblings?
Situation: A child with a persistent problem that is not
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congruent with the rest of their life  Questions: What is the
parent's relationship like? Is there something intimidating, unfair, or
painful in the child's life? Who can the child trust? Who can tell me
more?
Situation: A client who doesn't like people at work
Questions: What is the company like? Who is the boss? What is the
relationship with the colleagues like? Is it very competitive? Does the
client like their work?
Types of Problems
Ask yourself after or during sessions: what type of problem or
challenge were we working on?
Presenting Problems- I come for coaching with this challenge to

overcome. 
Goal Bases Not a Problem- a towards goal. I came to have
support to reach my goal.
Secondary Gain- Benefits I get from having the problem. 
Safe Problems- The problem is part of me. I’ve had it for decades
or years. I talk about it often. Part of me doesn’t want to solve it. 
Situational Problem- A physical ailment, a job loss, a problem that
is greater than the individual (country is at war). 
Systemic Problem- A triangle between three people. A work
relationship which goes beyond the team members.
 P roblems based in the past- I can’t stop thinking about... Most
sadness comes from over focus on the past. 
Problems based in the future- Thinking about the future
prevents action and clarity about the present. This can lead to anxiety
and overwhelm which then limits the person from taking action and
creating change.  
Life Stage Problems- I never experienced a certain stage. I loved
being... so much it is hard to move past that stage. 
Key Decision Problems- I’m the way I am because of a decision I
made a long time ago.
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6 Types of Coaching Goals
There are 3 primary perspectives for understanding your client. A
client is usually focused on one of these lenses. As a coach you can
change the lens to create an improvement and add in a strength. This
is when it is helpful to ask yourself, “What is missing?” The client is
often focused on only one type of goal.
3 Primary Types of Goals

1. External Goals are measured by time, money, material
possessions, marital status Objectives: how to figure out, achieve,
improve, fix defects. Dealing with cause & effect. Examples: career
shift, weight loss, financial goal... coordination is often needed.
Focus on: sequence of needed steps, how to get them done,

accountability, logistics, meaning and results broken down into
doable actions.
Working backwards by reverse engineering the problem.
2. Internal Goals (my experience, emotions, meanings, memories,

patterns)
Objectives: how to feel, enjoy, experience, and create meanings and

experience. Examples: feels lost, depressed, frustrated, disappointed,
wants to feel joy, desire, fulfillment, excitement.
Focus on: compelling future, reframe of meaning, goals & desires,

and needs.
3. Relational (how you communicate, relate, feel, and experience

relationships with other people).
Objectives: how we communicate, understand, and enjoy each other

in the moment, plan the future, and what meaning we create from the
past.
Examples: conflicts between parents & children, couples, business

colleagues, friends, family members and desire to have more
closeness, passion, collaboration within different relationships.
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Focus on: meaning, purpose, planning, communication, roles,
agreements, needs, rules, patterns, triggers, and
experiences/actions. You should also understand the past while
focusing on helping the client move forward into the present.
Sometimes you’ll need to address these 3 types of goals.
These three goals often become part of the conversation because of

special circumstances or something very urgent.
4. Situational/Structural- (dealing with a difficult external

constraint that will not change quickly.
Examples: long-term health issue, limiting location, loss of job,

financial constraint, family responsibility
Focus on: working around the constraint, values and emotions,

finding meaning in steps & actions, finding someone to help and
support the client in their own life.
5. Structural- the structure of people & relationships is undermining

cooperation – loss of trust, leadership, instability.
Examples: CEO is corrupt, parent is abusive or irresponsible,

injustice, employee more powerful than manager, cultural limitations
or biases are causing problems, company going out of business.
Focus on: injustice, hierarchy, roles, apologies, reparations, breaking

out of group beliefs
6. Historical Perspective- Something happened in the past that is

too problematic to skip. This can be a trauma, injustice, betrayal, key
decisions. The coach will question a person’s past as it relates to
their current life and relationships.
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The SI Success Zones Strategy
Great for understanding where your client is strong, where they could
use growth, and gathering information for future sessions. Through
the 10 Success Zones the SI Coach can create a plan for future
sessions.
Every person has areas of strength, skill and success that SI

Coaching can help develop, deepen, and discover. The following
questions may be used as a quiz you give to a client or as
conversation topics for one or more sessions.
Success Zones will help both of you develop a plan for your
coaching work together. The focus is on understanding how an
individual relates to their world. Exploring these questions will lead to
a better understanding of Life Stages, Key Decisions, Regrets from
the Past, Self-Belief Patterns (positive & negative), Mode of Being,
Needs Strategies, as well as targets and goals for the client to work
towards in coaching.
I prefer to use these in conversation (rather than as a written quiz)

because they are great launching points for the coaching relationship.
The process also serves to create an atmosphere of self-discovery
and trust between coach and client.
Here is a possible way for you to introduce this conversation or

session to your client:
“In SI Coaching we explore ten areas of life experience. We find this

process helps people rapidly understand themselves, their goals and
their strengths as well as what skills and experiences will help them
develop. I want you to know that it is ok for us to spend a long time
talking in one area and it is also ok for us to move very quickly
through these questions together. All your answers are perfect,
because this is about you and your needs, goals, and way of
operating. I’ll take notes for you so you can focus on understanding
yourself better.
After our session, I’ll give you a copy of all your answers and my
notes on what you expressed in each area. Please add any answers
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or questions as we go so that we understand how each area affects
you in your current life, relationships, your past, or how it might
impact your future.”
Notes On Demo: Strengths Process and Success Zones

Process
How is the coach helping client find more strengths? How does this
process help elevate and reframe? How are values elevated to
strengths?
10 SI Success Zones
1. Strengths 
2. How I Treat Myself 
3. Flexibility 
4. Work Attitude 
5. Perspective 
6. Planning 
7. Leadership 
8. Social 
9. State, Mood, and Emotion
10. Action
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Success Zone 1: Strengths
What is a personal strength? Is it a quality you are born with like great
hearing, or physical ability?  
How do I know what is a strength vs. a skill that I’ve mastered? How
do I place my beliefs in the realm of my strengths?  
All these are great questions and for now you can file them away or
write them down to consider later in our coaching work.
In our SI Coaching together, we will consider all skills, innate abilities,

beliefs, and virtues to be your personal strengths. Think that your
strength is whatever makes you strong in yourself, your life, how you
deal with obstacles, goals, other people, or your perceptions of
situations.
Strengths Process
Ask your client to say, out loud, while you write down for them, the
following stem statement over and over again. Let them know you will
exhaust this question because often the best strengths are shared at
the end. If needed, you will prompt your client, answering the
question for them in the beginning with your truthful observations of
their strengths. These strengths you provide to your client can be as
simple as: I am strong because I take care of others. I am strong
when I speak the truth. I am strong in my sense of right and wrong. I
am strong when I easily make decisions.
I am strong when... 
I am strong because...
 I am strong due to my belief in....
List all your clients’ strengths.
46
Success Zone 2: How I Treat Myself
(Choose the statements that best apply to you.)
I’m always kind to myself.
I feel balanced and capable of seeing my negative and positive

characteristics.
I use my frustration, anger or mean voice to get myself to do things.
I know how to be my own friend.  
When I’m in pain I reassure myself.
 I can only feel good about myself when I’m better than average.
I can only feel good about myself when I know I am succeeding.
I am highly competitive even with myself.
 I sometimes hear another person’s or my own critical voice repeating

itself.
Success Zone 3: Flexibility

I enjoy many different activities.
I like to change tasks or actions often.
I’m able to see many different possibilities at once.
I can go from big picture thinking to small action steps easily.
It is hard for me to switch activities quickly.
If I’m focusing on a book, conversation, or chore I get frustrated when

I’m interrupted.
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If life throws me a new problem I take it in stride.
 I get really overwhelmed by unexpected challenges.
I get bored easily.
 I love learning new skills.
 I’d rather stick to what I know how to do well.
I like new places.
I like new people.  
I feel scared and unsure often.
Success Zone 4: Work Attitude

Procrastination is a big issue for me.
I worry that I just don’t have what it takes to work hard enough to
accomplish my goals.
I have a tendency to work so hard I forget to take care of myself and

or my relationships.
Hard work always gets me results.  
I don’t like work, responsibility, or practicing skills I’m not good at.
Instead of calling it work I call it.  
I enjoy working in 15 minute, 30 minute, 1 hour, 3 hour or longer

chunks.
 It is hard for me to prioritize my tasks for work or projects.
 I love my work.  
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I’d prefer to get things done than to relax.
Success Zone 5: Perspective

(Choose the statements that best apply to you)
It is hard for me to see another’s perspective.  
I see many perspectives in every situation.  
I seek out other’s perspectives.  
I have a very strong opinion or perspective. Others might describe me

as judgmental.
I struggle with people who have a different political or social belief

than my own.
My family and friends are very different than me. I often feel.... About
being different. Even when I get another’s point of view it doesn’t
change anything about how I feel or experience a situation.
Success Zone 6: Planning

Having a structured plan is needed for me to feel secure and able.  
I go with my gut and intuition, so plans don’t mean that much to me.
Plans are meant to be broken.
Creating detailed strategy and plans are a joy for me.
I like planning more than doing at times.
 I have plans which I keep private from the people I love.
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The biggest compliment a family member, colleague, or friend can
pay me is to ask me to help them create a plan.
I keep lists.
 I follow my lists.  
I never make a plan because it limits me.
I am always told by others that I should plan more.
Success Zone 7: Leadership

I am a natural leader.  
In my past I felt great when I was a leader. In my family I am the

leader.
I like to support a leader.
 I think leadership is not as useful as group consensus.  
I’d like to increase my leadership skills.
 I often find that leaders are misguided and or arrogant.  
I like to break all the rules.  
The best leaders are good listeners. The best leaders are
charismatic.  
To be able to lead I would need... skills or attitude?  
I’d like to take more leadership in this part of my life...
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Success Zone 8: Social
Being in a crowd like a concert, parade, event feels awesome.  
I prefer to be with just one person at a time.
 I like being alone.  
When I socialize in small groups of 2-6 I am happiest.
The more the merrier for gatherings or get-togethers.
I have a hard time accepting my family’s social needs.
 During this past time of life being with many people was fun. I
miss interacting with more people.  
I feel overwhelmed at big events.  
I feel that this type of relationship is missing from my life.
The type of people I’d like to interact more with are....
 I’d like help planning how to create more of this ______________ in my

social life.
Success Zone 9: State, Mood, and Emotions

I am happy about the way I experience my emotions:

Some of the time  
All of the time 
Hardly any of the time
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The emotions I am most comfortable experiencing are:
 1
 3
The emotions I don’t like are...
The emotions I have a hard time relating to in others are...
Success Zone 10: Action

I trust my instincts.
I am ready to do what it takes to create the life I want.
I make decisions easily and quickly.
Decisions overwhelm me and so I avoid big changes or situations

where change is necessary.
I take my time to decide something but when I do decide I follow

through.  
Decisions are painful.
 I often regret a choice I make.
 I start many projects and finish few but this doesn’t bother me
because this is how my creativity shows itself.
I only start what I know I can finish.
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I need help getting organized.  
I’m sick of wasting my time and accomplishing little.
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Day 2
21 Journeys™ Class
1-Core Connection
2- Embrace and Breath 
3- Spinning 
4- Stillness in Heart
5- Flow
6- Cleanse Emotions
7- New Stillness 
8- Hands to Full Heart 
9- Energy Ball 
10- Space Travel 
11- Water 
12- Metaphor 
13- Occupy Yourself 
14- Corpse Pose 
15- Wishing Practice 
16- Mission 
17- Walk With Your Story
18- Letting Go
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19- Equilibrium
20- Juggling Strengths and Weakness  
21- Connection and Infinity
Reflections on 21 Journeys™ Class

Journeys which were particularly meaningful to me:
Images, symbols that presented to me:
Journeys which I felt a resistance to:
Thoughts, emotions, or experiences I want to remember:
55
Metaphor Strategy
During Life Story or Discovery Sessions, some metaphors may be
brought out which are limiting the client’s potential.
This session is about recreating a client’s metaphor.
1. Find out what metaphor is creating a limit for them. Often this
could be a metaphor about being loved, succeeding, money,
not being enough in some way, or a metaphor for a key
relationship in the client’s life.  
2. Explore ways to change the metaphor that enable the client to

experience greater happiness.  You may use a room, a journey
in a car or plane, a landscape all as a metaphorical space to
explore a new way of being, feeling or taking action the client
wishes for.
3. Find a real life symbol, action or material object which will

remind them daily of their new metaphor.  This may be
reminding them of their journey during the session.
4. Practice giving a directive to your client using the new metaphor

each day of their life. Ask for a commitment in minutes a day,
where, and for how long they will practice using new metaphor.  
5. Discuss how this new metaphor will affect others in the client’s
life. This invokes inner positive leverage.  
6. Have client imagine a time in the future when life is different

because of this new metaphor  
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Examples of Metaphorical language a client may
use and examples of statements which would lead
to finding the associated metaphor.
“At work I feel like my back is up against a wall.” 
“When I think of selling my throat tightens and I feel shut down.”
“I want to date but I feel like a frumpy dog.”
 “I love painting but can’t stand my inner judger.” 
“I am like a brick wall.”
 “When she opens up to me I turn into a scared little boy.” 
“In my relationship with my Mom I’m the Mom.”
 “My Dad always wanted me to be a boy.”
Demo Notes on Metaphor Strategy

Existing Metaphor:
Questions asked to create new metaphor:
 Emotions attached to old and new metaphor:  
Key People relating to metaphor:  
Limiting actions, thoughts, beliefs related to old metaphor:  
New opportunities with new metaphor:
Inner positive leverage:  
Directive to use metaphor:  
Imagining future life with new metaphor:
57
Strategies
& Topics
58
The Mode of Being Strategy
Very often a client's greatest stress will come about because
somehow they are not able to live life the way they feel they were
intended to. For some reason, instead of relating and harmonizing
with their environment, their relationships, their goals, they are
clashing or internalizing a lot of stress or conflict. When we see this,
it's great to try to understand their mode of being.
Here's an example: If you put somebody in a crowded room with

other people, they will choose some position or role to take in that
room. Some of them will go around introducing themselves to
everyone and socializing. Some will be observers. Some will hole up
in a corner and read. Some will organize people, or create games, or
try to become a leader.
One way to think of this is that this is how they express their mode of
being, their preferred habitual way of relating, interacting, achieving,
and meeting their needs.  
Examples of Modes of Being
• Helper 
• Zen Master
 • Lover 
• Achiever 
• Artist 
• Leader
 • Caretaker 
• Loyal friend/Supporter  
• Team member 
• Rebel 
• Peace Maker
• Organizer
• Observer
• Survivor
• Action Taker
• Lover
• Spiritual One
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Mode of Being Strategy
If a client is miserable in their work, it may be that a relationship is
making them miserable, it may be that the workplace is doing
something stressful to everybody, or it may be that the client has
been prevented from taking their usual mode of being.
For instance:
A nurse loved her job and was the best at it. Then she was promoted
to head nurse, with a team of nurses to manage. She loved the
money, but she was miserable. It may be that her mode of being is
that of the helper / caretaker, not the manager. The coach may point
this out: "You know what, I think it's just that you're a caretaker at
heart, and that all this management is holding you back from what
you really enjoy. Could that be it?"
Once the client realizes this (if it happens to be true) she can
consider whether she'd like to move back to her position as a nurse,
or whether she can develop a new mode of being as a manager.
Mode of Being Strategy

1. Listen to your client talk about their situation  
2. When in the past was the client more happy and fulfilled? What
mode of being was that?
3. Is their current situation enabling them to assume their preferred

mode of being?
4. Point it out: Could it be that you're really an adventurer at heart,

but at work you have to be the fact checker?
5. Strategize how they can assume their mode of being more

(choose one or two):
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a) Find a way to assume their mode of being within the current
situation.
b) Find how to assume their mode of being more outside of the

current situation.
c) Change their situation so that they can assume their mode of

being.
d) Decide to learn a new mode of being in the current situation.
e) Use Mode of Being as a reward.
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Name:
Date:
Mode of Being Session
Strategies
& Topics
62
Example of Mode of Being used in Coaching a
Mother/Daughter:
A very devoted mother came to me for coaching because she was
concerned about her 19-year-old daughter. The mother thought the
daughter was depressed and worried about the daughter’s ability to
do well in college and be successful socially. As we spoke, the
mother mentioned that her daughter would tell her that she had a
backup plan. If college didn’t work out, she would move to Cuba and
be very happy.
The mother told me that, in her senior year of high school, the
daughter had planned a 20-person trip to Cuba.
As we continued to talk, it became clear to me that the daughter had

a mode of being as the Adventurer. I asked the mother if this was
true. She confirmed that it was, and this is why her daughter had a
plan B. Instead of worrying about the plan B, I encouraged the mother
to see it as a very positive frame of mind for her daughter and one
that should be encouraged. I directed the mother to ask for the
daughter’s help in planning exciting vacations for her mother and
father to take. I also suggested that, at the end of each semester, that
the mother encourage her daughter to use her Adventurer mode of
being and take some trip or create an experience that was full of
Adventure in her own town. In this way Mode of Being was crucial to
our coaching work.
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Six Human Needs Coaching Session
Certainty
Uncertainty/Variety
Significance
Love/Connection
Growth
Contribution
Exploring how each need is met. Start with the need that the client
feels most drawn to. Let them know you will have time in the future to
explore all their needs. Explain the purpose of Six Human Needs
Psychology. Let the client know that this Strategy will give the client
greater understanding about their family and friends. By
understanding another’s needs we can quickly and easily transform
the relationship challenges we face. The same is true for our
relationship with ourselves. As we get good at meeting our needs at
the highest level we also create the emotional life we want and are
able to focus and prioritize what we really need.
Script for Introduction to the Six Human Needs

Session
“I want to teach you a fantastic concept today called Six Human
Needs Psychology. Through understanding your needs and others
needs you can really transform your experience of living and being in
relationship with others. This is fun and easy. I’d like to start by just
reading you what the Six Human Needs are. Please tell me which
need stands out to you as being relevant in your daily life right now.
Some people feel one need is very relevant and some are drawn to
two or three, while some folks really like all six. So there is no right or
wrong here.”
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Read out the needs slowly and use many descriptive words.
Certainty: safe, homey, secure, sure of everything, in control, taken

care of
Uncertainty/Variety: excitement, unexpectedness, spontaneous,

creative, flowing, free
 S ignificance: Important, special, worthwhile, acknowledged
Love/Connection: Caring, passionate, warmth, belonging,

synchronized, adored
Growth: changing, developing, pursuing new goals
Contribution: expanding, giving, making things better, selfless
Depending on what client tells you, choose one to three needs to

focus on during the session.
“Now that we have figured out what your rules are for meeting your
need for _____. How do you think you can make it even easier to feel
?”
“Great. Let’s make it even easier and better for your well being. How
could you do that? Remember what is really important is that feeling
happens every day and is in your control to feel. There are lots of
ways to meet _____ need. For example, I used to need to eat ice
cream to feel variety. Now, I browse pictures in my favorite Pinterest
accounts to meet my need for variety.” (Give example that works for
client and for you).
“Next, let’s look at what you expect from others to feel _____. Can
you make
that easier too? Sometimes our rules for others set us and them up to
fail. It’s human nature to expect everyone to have the same rules,
when really one person shows love by being on time and another
shows it by being funny and bringing coffee.
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Six Human Needs Worksheet
Certainty:  
Rule: What has to happen to feel certain, safe, secure, taken care
of?
Vehicle: What I do to meet my need?
Uncertainty/Variety:  
Rule: What has to happen to feel excitement, variety, creativity, good
fear?
Significance:  Uncertainty/Variety:  
Rule: What has to happen to feel important, special, acknowledged?
Love/Connection:
 R ule: What has to happen to feel loved, cared for, connected to
others?
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Growth:
Rule: What has to happen to feel like you are expanding, learning,
taking on more, thriving?
Contribution:
Rule: What has to happen to feel you are giving beyond yourself,
making the world better, making your family grow and thrive or the
larger world grow and thrive?
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Notes on Six Human Needs Demo
How does the client react to a need they want to focus on?
Are they choosing a need that is missing, or one they enjoy a lot?
Does their focus on need or needs match what you expected from
them?
What type of questions does the coach ask?
What Key words have you noticed them using?
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Name:
Date:  
Six Human Needs Session
Rules for
Need Rules for Self Vehicles
Others
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Three Ways to Expand the Unit
Expanding the unit means looking into your client's environment to
understand what other forces are acting on them. You are rarely the
most impactful person in their life - if you ignore those other
relationships, you're missing out on the majority of emotional
influence in your client's life. When you harness the power of the
client’s key relationships, you find the real motivating factors for
insight and change.
In this information-gathering session, tell your client that you'd like to

learn more about their world and the key people in their life. Ask them
about each of these relationships, and allow them to explore their
thoughts, feelings and needs in relation to these key individuals. Get
very curious.
1. Key Relationship Session Spouse (or closest relationship)

Children Parents Siblings Friends/Work
Good questions to ask yourself:
Who is the most impactful relationship in your client's life?

Who is their biggest support? 
Who is the trickiest person in their life?
Who has strong opinions about your client's wishes, direction,
action?
Who are they devoted and committed to (i.e. children, friends, work)?
What are significant points in the history of these relationships (i.e.
milestones in the family)?
2. Phone Session
You have gathered information about your client and their situation,
and you're looking for another perspective to shed light on what is
going on. Maybe your client has talked extensively about their
spouse, for instance, but that's only 1/2 of the perspective. You're
looking for the other perspective, which can be accomplished quickly
by a short conversation with this key person in your client’s life.
Ask your client: It would be really great if I could talk to (name) so I
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can help you have a better relationship with them. Would it be OK
with you if I had a short phone conversation with them? Don’t worry, I
won’t tell them that. I’ll just ask if we can talk for a few minutes to
understand their perspective.
Calling the significant person: Say (e.g.) "Hello, I'm coaching

Samantha, and she gave me your number. When coaching someone
I often find it useful to get the perspective of some of the key people
in my client's life. I was wondering if I could have a few minutes of
your time to understand, from your point of view, what is going on
with her and what might most help her. Is there anything that you
think she might be needing that I should know about? I'd really
appreciate your thoughts."
When making this call, you are letting the person know that you are
asking for their information and valuable perspective. You are not
there to coach or evaluate them (you're not their coach). This will put
them at ease and feel that they are helping by sharing their valuable
perspective.
3. Multi-Person Session
When a key relationship would benefit from further clarification,

collaboration, or planning, bring them into the session. This is most
likely a spouse, co-parent, sibling, co-worker, friend, or anyone
whose participation is important.
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Session Focus: Emotions
When clients suffer from moodiness, anxiety, sadness, or uncertainty,
they are in need of a mood makeover. This can be done in small
steps during each session, or it may be the focus of one session.
Strategies for Mood/Emotional Strengthening:
Pre-Coaching or as coaching support:
1. The 21 Journeys™ Class may help create the skill that is

necessary for  mood mastery and emotional health.
2. SI Success Zones Information and Planning Session.

Understand and create goals for future emotional strength,
flexibility and mastery.
3. Boundaries visualization Strategy  
Session Strategies:
Four P’s
Pearl Formula  
Getting Closer to the difficult  Emotion
Coaching 360  
Archetype
Crazy Eight
Pretend
Higher Consciousness
Healing Boundaries 
Emotional Maturity Strategy
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Five Strategies for Emotional Maturity Strategy
Six Steps to Emotional Maturity Strategy
Understanding Crazy Eight Strategy  
Getting Closer  
Getting Universal
Getting Resourceful
 Pretend the Symptom  
Being Your Own Best Friend
 Higher Consciousness Healing
Boundaries and Awareness Visualization
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Archetypes Strategy - Integration
This strategy is all about integration. Inside of us there are often
different selves that take on roles, create meaning, and interact with
our world. These different parts of ourselves are experienced in a
variety of ways within a specific relationship or area of life. For
example, as a child, we might have been imaginative and free. When
we think of that little girl or boy, we may see ourselves in the realm of
fantasy, where gardens are full of fairies, pools may contain
mermaids, and it is always an option to have a super power.
Then there are the life zones or areas in which we act and think in a
specific way. So our logical and pragmatic self could show up at
work. Our caring and protective self-shows up when we parent. When
going on a vacation, we become a traveler who is adventurous and
outgoing. When we are with our lover, we are more focused on
enjoying pleasure, our senses, and touch, differently from our work
self, or our family self.
When we use the archetype process with a client, we invite the

different archetypes, such as the lover, the magician, the warrior, the
sovereign, the goddess, and the wise man or woman to have a
conversation with us (the client) and to help the core self to
understand or to answer a key question.
I use this process to help a client who would like to gain more access
to a part of themselves, like the lover or the magician. We begin by
finding a key question and refining the question until it is going
towards a solution instead of away from one. For example, the first
question a client asks might be, “How do I act more feminine around
my husband?” The coach could help make this a better question by
suggesting a change to, “How can I feel more feminine?” We have
removed being feminine towards another and we have replaced it
with a feeling which is at the core of the experience.
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The Archetype Process
First, we breathe deeply and become centered. This is what I
call “neutral.” I explain to the client that neutral is a place which is
easy to return to at any time, just by breathing deeply and
remembering this is our core, relaxed, neutral self.
Second, we choose an archetype to start the process.

Some teachers teach a specific sequence to the archetypes, for
instance: warrior, magician, lover, sovereign.
When I work with a client, I choose an archetype which is either very

easy for the client to enter into or an archetype who is very
complimentary to the question.
For example, with the question, “How can I feel more feminine?” I
would first ask the magician. I think of the magician archetype as a
close friend to the lover, which would be most directly related to the
feminine.
You begin by asking the client to take the position of a magician. It

may be helpful to describe the magician, or to ask your client about
what they see when they think of their magician. I have had clients
tell me very clearly, “Oh I am just like this fairy in the movie Lord of
the Rings, I can see the mountains around me and feel the air.”
Then, ask your client to find the part of their body where the magician
lives. Tell them to breathe into this part of themselves and make a
sound of the magician, or to allow their arm or hand to move like the
magician. A client may be standing, sitting, lying down or moving
during this process. If you’re guiding them through this on a phone
coaching session, it is fine for them to hold a phone while doing the
process.
Third, when you get the client to be the archetype, ask the
question they have formed, speaking directly to this archetype.
You might say, “Magician, I would like to ask you a question today.
Your help is greatly appreciated.
Our purpose is to help (your client’s name). Magician, how can
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(client’s name) feel more feminine?”
Then, as the Magician answers your question, allow there to be a

natural conversation with the archetype you are speaking to. When
you have spoken long enough (usually 2-5 minutes) ask your client to
sit again in neutral and breathe regularly as they return to this neutral
space, which is the core of the person.
Fourth, let your client know you would like to speak to

their warrior
(Or whichever archetype feels right to you.) Say, “Warrior I would like
you to stand and take the position of strength and power that is
unique to you, warrior.” When client has done this, ask them again to
find a place in their body, or a gesture they make, and then make the
sound of the warrior. You may ask them to repeat this sound to help
them get into the state of the warrior. Now, go through the steps
again of having a conversation with the warrior, starting with the main
question, “How can (client’s name) feel more feminine?” You may
want to ask the warrior how they protect (client’s name) or if they
worry about her.
Remember, throughout all your conversations, that the archetypes

are always working for the good of the core person. As their coach,
you are requesting that they help the core self. The archetypes might
“re-order” themselves to allow new experiences or emotions to be felt
by the core self. You may want to ask one archetype, like the warrior,
to take a holiday. You may ask the magician for a way that your client
can easily call to them and feel their unique and relaxed magic.
Keep in mind:
You may want to go straight from one archetype to another, or you

may want to rest in neutral. I like to return a client to neutral in order
to create time for integration during the process. This is similar to
returning to deep breathing between yoga poses or resting for one
minute between weight training rep cycles.
Fifth, you may then repeat the question and conversation

process with all the archetypes. Often it may be helpful to return to
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the most opposite archetype, like the warrior for the lover, in order to
get the deepest agreement and suggestions. This process should
have the spirit of fun, relaxed play.
Remember that throughout the process it is important to consistently

elevate, thank and integrate through the breathing neutral position.
You can ask, while they are in neutral, whether there is another
archetype the client would like to speak to. Sometimes a client has a
different word or idea for an archetype some examples would be,
“The Comedian.” “The Jester.” “The Spiritual One.” “The Leader.”
“The Seer.” The list could go on and on, but you get the idea.
Sixth, when answers have been given by all the archetypes, it is

time to integrate and rebalance your client. Ask them to sit in
neutral and spend a long time returning to the even, easy breathing,
feeling gratitude for all the parts of themselves that spoke through the
archetypes. Remind your client that he/she can access these parts of
themselves at regular times in the day, when they may need a little
more of a particular archetypes strength.
Give yourself plenty of time to speak with your client after the
process. This time is important for grounding back into the core self
and physical body. You may want to add a meditation that focuses the
client on feeling grounded. A simple example of this would be to
imagine their body like a tree with strong roots in the earth. Make
sure that before you send a client to drive home they are in a relaxed
easy state and are back to feeling themselves.
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Parts of Self
With this strategy you are doing a modified Archetype process. This
is great for clients who may not like the idea of archetypes and feel
they are too “woo woo” or whimsical. Through the Parts of Self
Strategy, the client identifies two main identities that play out in their
life. These identities will be unique to the client.
Ask your client: if they had to identify two main parts of themselves
are is part of their day-to-day life experience, what would these be?
Let’s explore together how these two show up: when, where, why and
with whom. Also, when you wish they would not show up. For
example, a lawyer who is very identified with his professional persona
may wish to not show up this way with a spouse or child.
Explore activities, transitions, and relationships where one identity,

part of self should or shouldn’t be present. How to remind that part of
self that this isn’t their time, and how to remember that all parts of self
are joined by the core self.
Through understanding the parts and creating desires, limits, and

boundaries we help the client integrate and actually feel more whole
and skillful at the core level.
Integration
Both Archetype, Parts of Self, Many Marriages and Life Zones

strategies work by breaking up a large concept (self, life, relationship)
into the components that allow us to understand the unique needs of
each part and then to integrate into the whole so that the person feels
unified and happier.
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Archetypes Strategy/Warrior
Questions to ask Archetype:
Key Words/ Strategies/ Directives/

Observations
Relationships Metaphors HW
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Archetypes Strategy/Lover

Observations
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Archetypes Strategy/Magician

Observations
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Archetypes Strategy/Sovereign

Observations
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The Four P’s Strategy
Use this strategy to help a client shift their state in relation to a
specific person, situation, trigger, or action in their life.
The Four P’s
! Purpose
! Posture
! Presence
th
! Optional 4 P is to Picture it
Example: “When I have to meet my ex-husband

every week to drop off the kids, I always get
triggered and feel terrible afterwards.”
Using the Four P’s you get to practice a new way to feel and
experience a difficult emotional transaction and state of being. This
helps the client overcome their usual emotional triggers. This can
also help them to become stronger, more open, loving, confident and
so on.
Invite your client to use the Four P’s to transform a difficult experience
and gain Emotional Maturity Strategy and control. (Choose a “focus
experience” which is common in their weekly life.)
Explain that they can use this with any area of their life but each time
they’re create the Four P’s process to be specific to the event, trigger,
person, or action that causes them emotional stress.
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  S tep 1:   Create a purpose for the interaction.
“I talk to my ex-husband to give him important information about the

kids and I model to the kids that their parent love them and can work
well together as co-parents.”
Step 2  : Create a posture and anchor it in the body.
“With my purpose in mind I relax my shoulders, I breathe into my

stomach, and I smile and look him in the eyes.”
Step 3:  Be in the present moment.
Most of our emotional problems are a result of being in the past or the
future. This creates sadness (past) and anxiety (future). As people we
have a tendency to expect another or ourselves to repeat an old
pattern, or we fear the future will be the same as the past. This keeps
us from making emotional shifts, taking risks, and expecting a new
state in ourselves.
Guide your client to tap themselves or touch a part of their face, head,
body that reminds them, “I am here in the present moment. In the
present moment nothing is the same as the past and I don’t think
about the future. Change happens when I’m present.
Practice Makes Perfect
• Practice the Four P’s with your client at least 3 times. Discuss the
experience with them. You can also give them a directive to do this
practice on their own each day. This way when they need to use the
Four P’s they are very good at them and they are now conditioned to
react in a new way with a new focus and energy during their “difficult”
interaction.
• Directive: This is an action or suggestion like a homework

assignment you give your client to do outside of your coaching
sessions. Directives make change happen in the client’s real life and
relationships.
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Coaching 360 Strategy
1. Brainstorm all the emotions the client experiences regularly.
2. Explore the emotions the client doesn’t enjoy but partakes in

regularly  and the emotions they do enjoy and want more of.
3. Choose one emotion to focus on. This could also be a belief,

word, metaphor, person, activity or phrase.
4. Look at benefits (Secondary Gain), sources, triggers, actions,

people, times of day, foods, and stresses related to the
emotion, person, place, word or thing.
5. You may or may not want to introduce the idea of the Crazy
Eight during this session. Looking at what the swing emotion is
for the emotion you are 360ing.
6. If this emotion were a person how would they dress? What

would they like doing? Who would their friends be?
7. Get as creative and fun as possible with your questions about

the emotion, person, thing, etc.
8. The goal is to walk all around this word and understand it

exhaustively from many perspectives. It will no longer hold the
same power or meaning. This is a playful ordeal and pretend
strategy which strengthens flexibility, empathy, understanding,
and perspective. 
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Notes on Demo: Coaching 360
How easy is it for client to get imaginative?
Do you feel like you know this emotion as a person?
What would you like to ask this person?
How does the strategy help the client create greater integration inside
themselves?
Coaching 360 Notes
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Key Decisions Strategy
During life every person makes important decisions which are
guidelines for their smaller choices, values, and states. A key
decision may be conscious or unconscious. It may have helped a
person or eventually hurt them by holding them back from growth in
their life. Often, a key decision is made at a traumatic moment. This
can be a big moment which stands out in memory like the death of a
loved one, being hurt, or it may be a more subtle moment like
receiving a bad grade, being teased or bullied. During coaching a
client may naturally realized that at some point they decided upon a
general belief or value which is now holding them back. This is when
it is most helpful to use the Key Decision Strategy. The purpose of the
strategy is to allow the client to make a new decision now with the
resources they have. To forgive themselves if their key decision hurt
or limited them or others. The purpose is not to relive the trauma
which led to the key decision in the first place. I find it helpful to first
orient the client to their core positive values, strengths, connection
with self and what they love in life. From this place a new decision
may be made.
Example of old key decision: “I can not trust men they only want to
use me.”
New Key Decision: “I trust myself to know when I can open up to a

man I like.”
After creating the new decision help the client imagine how this new
decision will benefit themselves and others.
Go back and remember old decision and the self who needed that
decision with compassion. See when that old decision may be
tempted to jump back in and take control. For example on a date with
a new man.
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Explore with client how they will react to the old decision and
empower the new decision.
Ground this in the body, breathing, posture, use and image or symbol
if this helps the client.
Have the client choose a time of day to remember their new key
decision and feel the emotional reaction inside themselves as they
remember their new key decision. Practice in the session.
This may be a very powerful session and you will want to take time at
the end to have easy grounding conversation with the client. You may
want to ask about their week, work, plans for the weekend.
Key Decision Notes:
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Six Steps to Emotional Maturity Strategy
Step 1: Feel it: sadness, fear, whatever emotion is happening. When
we join with the emotion it gets smaller, we take responsibility and
care of it from our innate kindness.
Step 2: Is there a story that comes with this emotion? Example: I

always get angry when my husband comes home late from work.
Now, I allow myself to feel that anger very closely. What is my story
about this? He doesn’t care about me so he is late. Just notice what
is that story.
Step 3: Become resourceful and have 3 new thoughts: 

1. He hit traffic, 2. He stopped for a coffee, 3. He works very hard and
keeps going. Any three new thoughts work.
Being creative and expansive can be difficult. Add being kind to

yourself and this is why this step is very important. You are easily
creating the first ingredient for creativity and kindness. We call this
getting resourceful by thinking 3 new thoughts on the subject of pain.
These three new thoughts activate the part of you that can be
creative and empowered to take responsibility for your emotions.
Now, you are moving away from the frustrated or negative emotion
and you are going towards feeling resourceful. This allows you to
choose a new emotion you want to feel.
Example: I want to feel compassion, I want to feel kindness towards

myself, I want to feel sad instead of angry.
Step 4: Bring up a memory or thought that invokes and gets you into
the atmosphere of that feeling you want to have (whatever the client
has chosen). If you want to feel creative is there a time or experience
or object that helps you get into the sense, the atmosphere of
creativity?
Step 5: Kindness, love and compassion: Once you are in the

atmosphere of the emotion you have chosen you can do even more if
you like. If you or the client could not think of an emotion they wanted
they can skip to this step. All you need to do is choose one of these 3
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emotions either kindness, love or compassion we are bringing in our
own healing ability.
Let’s say you chose kindness, now bring up a memory or image of

kindness. A time when you or another was kind. Think of an image
that reminds you of the atmosphere of kindness.
Step 6: Now that you are resourceful and in the atmosphere of one of
these top emotions think of an action you can take. Make this an
action for yourself or for someone else. Now you are choosing an
action from an empowered emotional state that you created.
Sometimes feeling of shame or guilt for past emotions will surface.

You can actively forgive yourself for the past emotions and reactions
you’ve had. Sometimes taking mature emotional responsibility for
emotions can create a desire for taking on more and more
responsibility. This is why forgiving oneself for the past is key. Create
your own unique forgiveness statement that applies to you. One I like
is: I did all I could with the information and range of emotions and
knowledge I had at the time.
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Typical Emotional Pattern  
Crazy Eight: a pattern of going from one intense emotional
experience to another regularly as part of life. This strategy was
developed by Anthony Robbins.
 S adness I am connected Anger They made me…
 F rustration I feel stuck Rebellion Desire to feel free

“Fuck it, them, and everything.” 
Motivated I can do it
Overwhelm This is too much, I

will never accomplish this, I
can’t focus.
When using the example of the Crazy Eight explain to the client that
through observation they are creating a third perspective which is
now breaking this destructive cycle. This new perspective has the
energy to create better ways to meet needs on either side of the
Crazy Eight.
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Emotional Strategy Getting Closer
Use this strategy with an emotionally healthy client who is holding their
emotion outside of themselves. Do not use this with a depressed,
immature, unstable, or suicidal client.
Ask client to feel the difficult emotion. Be there with it while you are there
with them as coach, supporting them. Ask client to see what is
underneath the emotion. Elevate the client as they practice. Stay with it
for only 1-2 minutes. This is not pretending the emotion. This is feeling
emotion so fully that client is giving their love to themselves and to the
emotion. Therefore, it has a healing and lightening effect. Client should
be able to notice what else is there under the emotion. Often, this is
another emotion.
Getting Closer
The goal is for the client to be able to really feel what they present to them
in the moment. This might be a memory, a thought, a feeling as a
metaphor or experience in the body like a wave. While inviting the emotion
to be close client also is able to experience the emotion, thought or
memory becoming transparent or being gone.
You may ask what else they feel to discover the layers of emotions which
are there. The question may be asked as is there another emotion under
this one or is there a cousin emotion. Or would you like to add your love or
other positive emotion now as you get closer? The client is learning to be
very present and loving with their emotions.
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Emotional Strategies: Get Universal
Oftentimes, a person is struggling with the feeling of being special
or different due to a perceived lack, struggle or challenge. Getting
Universal allows the client to experience connection outside of
themselves. This counteracts the usual process of feeling connection
with self due to relating through a problem or difficult emotion.
You can include the Research Project Strategy as a helper to the Get
Universal Strategy. As the client does research to find out who else
deals with similar challenges or emotions, they increase their
awareness, brainstorm solutions, become more compassionate, and
stop the isolation which triggers deeper pain.
Reframing Pain/Stress as Tension in Body
1. How bad is stress or pain? ! This strategy is reframing any

2. Rate it on scale of 1 – 10. pain, worry, stress or anxiety as
3. Locate it in body. tension which can then be
4. Visualize relaxation of stress. helped by client.
5. Rate it again.
6. Apply more relaxations.
7. Give directive of when and
how to practice on own.
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Higher Consciousness Healing  
This process was taught to me by Tara Springet
and you kind find more in her books on how to use
this strategy with yourself and with your clients.  
• Discuss what higher consciousness means to client.
• Find a comfortable metaphor or experience that describes this

higher  consciousness.
• Create clear description of clients obstacle or problem.
• Have client describe what resource, skill they’d like to have to

overcome their problem.
• Visualize higher consciousness and ask for a symbol to help

the client create the skill, energy, wisdom, emotions needed by
them.
• Place symbol in the body. Experience the effects. Choose a

time each day to practice.  
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Boundary Bubbles as Helpers in  
Emotional Challenges
  • What type of client tends to have boundary problems?  
• What are the client’s beliefs around boundaries?
 • Guide client through visualizations to increase healthy boundaries.
 • Give Bubbles Directive to client to practice daily.
Healing of Other with Higher

Consciousness Help  
1. When a relationship is very difficult it can help client to ask for their
higher consciousness to do the healing.
2. Use bubbles for both client and other person. Make other persons
bubble very small and then give bubble to higher consciousness to
heal the person inside of their bubble.  
3. Make sure client’s truth is honored:
 4. For example: has done terrible things.
 5. I cannot heal .
6. I hope that receives insights, healings, truth so that

he / she may remedy the terrible things they have done and create
healing for self and others.
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Emotional Strategies: Getting Resourceful
! Hypnotic Resourcing ! Looking for the trigger, timing,

! Brainstorming Options follow up action, effect on
! Expanding the Unit others.
! Find the Benefit of the Problem ! Is this a safe problem?
or Problem Emotion. This is ! How have others solved this?
known as Secondary Gain. ! What is missing in myself that
could help me to create a
solution?
Pretend Strategy/Directive
! Great Strategy for children ! Warning: Do not use with
having tantrums and parents unstable clients with depression,
losing their cool, couples fighting, suicide or irrationality.
individuals with excessive
worrying, problems that repeat.
! When we make the ! Have client practice only with

unconscious conscious, we take you in the session for the first
control of the recurring negative week.
pattern or emotion.
! Four P’s and Coaching 360 ! Do not send client home to do

use Pretend. this on their own unless you are
sure it helps them.
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Keys to the Pretend Strategy
Pick:
• a time of day.
 • a length of time to practice. 
• A place where you will be.
• How you will return to your ordinary state. How do you know you
were pretending? You can shut off pretend quickly.
•  Sit and be with your problem, pretending to have it. If this is an

emotion, you may give it an identity like in 360 strategies and allow it
to have a voice if it wishes to speak its perspective.
Limit the amount of time you pretend to just 1 minute to begin. If

you’re using this more as an ordeal, you may make it up to 10
minutes.
For some clients, it helps to repeat this pretend strategy again at

different times of day. Remind the client that each time they practice,
they take control. 
• You can see us use this strategy in First Three Sessions, when
client pretends to pick a doll’s skin. She used to pick her own skin,
now the activity has been transferred to a safer object than her own
body. 
• This may even help with mild anxiety attacks, overeating, fears, or
any other emotional issue in which the client feels out of control.
The focus of pretend is to get so good at doing the emotion and then
returning to a normal or neutral state of mind. Essential to practice
this with your clients first.
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Being Your Own Best Friend
! Great for everyone ! Explores limiting beliefs client has
about self or life.
! Helps build emotional maturity, ! Can lead to Fairy Godparent

flexibility, kindness, communication Strategy or Pretend Strategy.
skills, relationship skills.
! Explores the person’s way of ! Empowers client to be their own

speaking to themselves internally. coach as well as friend by creating
deep integration of authentic self.
Steps to Being Your Own Best Friend Strategy

1. Ask the client how they speak to themselves when they
are angry at a situation, something they’ve done, or feeling frustrated.
Ask for their exact language and how often this recurs in a day.
2. Explain the importance of being one’s own friend and

how when we understand our needs, have compassion for ourselves
and speak to ourselves with kindness, we create a better and better
core authentic relationship with ourselves. This then leads to
improvement in all relationships, goals, and mood.
3. Ask the client to create an optional way to speak to

themselves. Use examples of tough situations from the client’s life
and practice ways to internally deal with the situation by being kind to
oneself.
4. Explain that this is a universal strategy which helps all

people because all people struggle with their inner dialogue. Use an
example from your own life and how you changed your internal
speech, thoughts, perspective and emotion towards yourself.
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5. Set a specific time to practice Being Your Own Best
Friend. Often in the evening or early morning is the best time, when
a person is closest to dream/sleep state or when a person can
inventory the day and be kind to themselves.
6. Does the client need to forgive themselves in some way

to do this? Sometimes this is the case and key decisions, elevation,
and life stage are helpful strategies.
7. A nice explanation to give the client for forgiveness is for them

to get that, at the time, they did all they could with the resources that
they had at the time. Now they have new resources and can forgive
the old version of themselves for not having all resources. This can
be expanded to others in the client’s life who have caused them pain
in the past.
Energy Repair For The Coach

When we work with others, some of us allow ourselves to be pulled
into the client’s emotional experience, past emotions, or challenges
on an energetic level. While this is part of the energy exchange that
occurs within a close relationship with a friend or family member, it is
not needed or helpful for a coach or healer. This exercise strengthens
your ability to generate and give energy which is immediately
renewed, like a fountain inside of you. This way you increase your
own energy while sharing your energy and elevating your client’s
state.
Practice this with a friend or by yourself regularly to

continue the experience. 
Step 1: Relaxing deep breathing
Step 2: Imagine a source of light and strength and

energetic power inside of your body.  -
Where is it? Touch that place. 
-What color is it? Enjoy the color.
-Where does it move inside of you?
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 -Experience that for a few seconds. 
-Are there words, images or sounds associated with the energy?  
-Say the words, listen to the sounds, or images and experience.
This is your “energy home” that continues to grow and build inside of
you as you focus on its strength and resourcefulness. The more time
you spend here the more it will grow and be available to you. For
some, it may be helpful to imagine a specific scene they feel very
happy in. That place gives them strength, joy and whatever good
feelings they relate to it. This is the energy home they can return to.
Step 3: Witness the energetic strength
Tell your practice partner, “I’m going to tell you a sad story, and while
I tell it to you I want you to keep touching that place that your energy
resides and grows from. You can feel what I’m saying, but it won’t
effect you in a negative way because your internal energy source will
be growing and spilling over and out towards me and the sadness I
describe. This way you are lifting me up in a kind and compassionate
way without lowering yourself. There is an endless supply of this
energy to lift others. You remain full and replenished. Giving means
creating and then more energy can be available to you and to those
you help.”
Step 4: Use magazines, news, or anything that would in

the past lower your energetic state.
Now experience the difficulties or sad stories while being connected

to your energetic listening space. Your energy can go out to the
negativity or sadness but it is from a full and overflowing place that
regenerates. The energy does not bleed, or become depleted as it
helps the other person or listens to a sad event.
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Strategies for Overcoming Negative
Patterns
Pretend Strategy
Four P’s Strategy
Ordeal Strategy
Recognition of the pattern
Being your own bet friend (kindness in the moment of recognition)
Pattern Interrupt (funny or ridiculous action, words or motions to

break the pattern)
Metaphor Strategy:
Changing a metaphor can change a relationship or a personal limiting
belief and take a client from feeling stuck to seeing options and taking
action.
You can use images, words, or stories as metaphors.
Never argue with a client’s new metaphor. Instead explore why this
image or word association helps them. Often times our metaphors
are very unique and personal so it can take time understanding
another person’s particular association.
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Three Ways We Use Story in SI 
 S tory Type 1: A myth, folktale, fairy tale that is told to client to shift
state, to identify with protagonist, to understand more of the client’s
world view.
Story Type 2: Tell the story of another client, friend, or yourself. By

using examples of others, we make suggestions which the client can
choose to incorporate as an indirect suggestion, or to explore outside
of the intensity of a direct conversation.
Story Type 3: Personal Hypnotic Story 
Step 1: Learn about what your client likes to do (mode of being),

activities they enjoy, life stages and key decisions. Find out what they
are missing that would give them the ingredients to be happier and to
do more of what they like in life. (PEARL Happiness Formula). When
you have a good idea of all these components, after about a half hour
chat or longer, go to step 2.
Step 2: Invite the client into a relaxed state (light trance) focus on
the breathing, sensations of sitting or listening, etc. You can tell the
client a story about a character, like an animal or an inanimate object,
that goes on adventure or journey. You put into your story the
elements, actions, and steps the client needs to take to get what they
want (happiness, achievement, better relationship, etc.). After the
story ends you go to the next step.
Step 3: Now it is time to discuss with the client what they

experienced during the telling of the story. They may immediately
share that they got it and now know what they must do, or they might
just comment on being entertained or confused. Ask what their
favorite elements in the story were. Were there any changes they’d
make to the story? Go with a natural conversation about the story.
Invite the client to communicate with you in the future about anything
they remember or any thoughts they have about the story. The story
has created a new resource in their emotions and in the coaching
session.
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Key Strategies to Overcome “Being
Stuck”  
• The Research Project Strategy  
• Coaching 360 Strategy  
• Fortunately/Unfortunately  
• Brainstorming Strategy  
• Reverse Engineering
• Finding the Spark (Seeing Beyond the Challenge)
 • Pretend Strategy 
• Moving Over Strategy (using what you know fro success zones to
find an area to increase strength in your client.)
 • What’s Missing Strategy (If your client had this they could then do...)
• Life Zones Strategy
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Talking About Your Coaching Practice
Your personal message Who do you serve? 
Change your perspectives from, “it’s about me” to “it’s about them.”
SI Coaching Packages
What follows are plans for 3 different coaching packages. These are
written in shorthand; the way we might plan them out ourselves. This
will give you the sense of the contour of an 8-week session – when
you become more conversant with the strategies over the next
months, you’ll recognize how they work together.  
SI Coaching Package Plans

Coaching Plan 1: Focusing On Personal Goals and
Challenges (8 Sessions)
1. Intro Session. (Understanding and Learning)– The purpose of
this session is to understand a person’s life in perspective of their key
relationships, sources of joy, pain, and hope. Is there a story from the
past they are stuck on or attached to? Is there a wish or purpose for
coaching? How did they seek help/change in the past? Find out what
patterns have worked for them and what has not. Overall, the goal for
this session is to be interested, learn as much as you can and
connect. Whenever possible, elevate through the focus of your
questions and or observations in a casual, conversational way.
2. Six Human Needs. The second session is a good time to

explain and explore the six human needs analysis in your own way.
Explain that by understanding your top needs and vehicles it will be
easier to accomplish a goal or to change a challenge. Explore the
way your client could meet his or her needs at a higher level.
3. Parts of Life. How do the different areas of life affect the client’s
needs and vehicles? What if the client were to meet needs in an
unusual way, changing their normal association to a need and an
area of life? What part of life has been ignored or given less
importance? When they are happiest, are the parts of life in a
different balance? Return to their needs and vehicles as much as
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needed. If client wants to discuss the people in their life and how they
meet their needs/vehicles, do this and support their desire to expand
the unit.
4. The Four P’s. Purpose, presence, posture. Discuss what

emotional state is needed for the client’s goals to be met. What will it
feel like when the goal is achieved, or the challenge eliminated? How
can the client begin to introduce this feeling and state, either daily or
whenever it is triggered? Begin to plan weekly actions that the client
will take towards their goal. Ask a client to keep a daily log of their
activities and emotions/focus/purpose/persons. Is there a pretend
strategy, ordeal strategy, or planning session you can either do in the
session, or ask client to do at home?
5. Creative Planning Session. There are several strategies that

can be used here: Pretend Session, Archetype Session, Expanding
the Unit, SI Success Zones, Fairy Godparent, Reverse Engineering
are good examples. All of these strategies would be helpful for
different challenges or goals.
6. Discuss the journal in detail. Find patterns and triggers that

may be keeping your client from their purpose/focus in terms of
actions or their emotional state. Do the Strength Finding process.
Discuss when the client uses their strengths. How can they use them
more often? Who else will benefit from the client’s strengths?
7. Rules/Tests/Triggers. Look into any of these which may be

keeping your client from the state, purpose and actions they need to
meet goals. Support system- who is the client’s key support, who do
they hold dear to them, whom do they respect, who was key in their
development? Is there a relationship they’d like to strengthen? Is
there another person who will benefit from their goal being met? Is
there a person who may feel disempowered by client’s challenge
being overcome or their goal met? Try to support the relationship that
could feel threatened through giving love and significance.
8. Expand the unit and give proof as well as gratitude and

celebration. Find ways for the client’s goals and emotional success to
spread to others in their lives. Now that they know themselves better,
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they can choose their own emotional reality. Discuss how this
changes their world. What if they were to dream very big? Invite them
to dream with you. This could be in regards to a relationship, work,
hobby, business, or it might allow the client to have the expansive
space of possibility. Find empowering actions they can take in their
life today to start realizing these dreams and effecting others
positively.
Coaching Plan 2: Working with Clients

Relationships
1. Discovery session. Allow for the client’s story to emerge. Ask
questions that bring out information and also elevate emotions and
relationships. If a person only wants to complain about their spouse,
dig deeper to understand what made them fall in love. What is the
good in the spouse? Focus on the true purpose for relationship and
how the client wants to feel. If seeing two clients, make sure to give
equal time to both.
2. Six Human Needs Session. Allow clients to give personal

names for these needs. Use large paper for the clients to create
visual representations that their spouse, child, or other family member
in coaching with them can see. Point out areas that are interesting –
for instance, the way one person’s need and vehicle may benefit the
other, or create polarity. Point out how this can create a wonderful
understanding. When working with the couple (or any type of
relationship), the goal for the coach is to see the good in this
relationship. This is about strengthening and creatively reinterpreting
the client’s needs, beliefs, vehicles, and rules.
For example, if you’re helping a needy wife who is very negative, see
her as a romantic. Ask her whether she has ever considered this?
Focus on how she likes to feel. Help her to express the way her
needs get met and how she wants them met in an even greater way.
If you’re helping a jealous husband, reframe it that he is madly in
love. The jealousy (as long as it is not too disruptive) becomes a
helper in the coaching session, because it is emotional proof of large
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feelings.
3. Many Marriages.  Whether this is a couple or another type of

close relationship, ask about all the different types of relationship that
exist for that couple. Types of marriages might include: creative,
playful, friendly, social, pet owners, parents, children, relatives,
professionals, spiritual, hobbies, lovers, guardians/protectors,
enthusiasts, supporters, adventurers/explorers, or homey/safe.
When a couple has found 4-10 types of marriages, ask them to pick
one thing they‘d like more of for each marriage. Also, if there are any
rules they have that haven’t been clear choose one rule for each
marriage. Even if they have 10 or more, ask them to focus on just
one. Share together the different marriages, including hopes (what
they want more) and any rules (detailing what should never happen in
the marriage). Have them do this with you. If either rules or hopes
create any friction in the conversation, congratulate their emotion and
honesty and look deeper into the emotion or need underlying that
rule/hope. Discuss the importance of there being different marriages
within one relationship. Find out what gets all the attention and what
needs more attention. Is there a new area of marriage they’d like to
create? Is there a marriage that they are very proud of? Explain that it
only takes one type of marriage to work to know that they can all
work.
4. Love styles. Discover which love style applies to each person.

How do they work together? Do they tie into the different marriages?
Does their style change depending on the type of marriage activity?
What needs are met by this love style? Celebrate the individual love
style. Find out its strengths and when it is at its best.
5. Plan ways to give. Meet separately with each person to plan

how they will fill the other one up more. Relate this planning to the
needs they’ve discovered and to the areas of marriage. Choose daily,
weekly, and monthly goals. Make actions simple and doable so there
will be no excuses. Set reminders together in session.
6. Offer/block. Increase communication strength by explaining how

offers and blocks work, both verbally and nonverbally. Encourage
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couple to practice with you and away from you. Replay and reinvent a
common interchange and elevate it to one where the true offer is
returned. Make this fun and successful.
7. Expanding the unit.  Is there anyone in the couple’s life who

needs to know of their new focus on a better relationship? Is there
anyone who will feel threatened? Discuss and plan together how they
can help others through their discoveries and strength together. Pay
attention to detail and give actions for the couple to take as
individuals to create understanding in their larger social network.
Also, if there needs to be strengthening with spouse’s family, make a
concrete plan to tell the spouse’s family about their commitment and
love.
8. Intimacy. Even the most happy sexual relationship could benefit

from some more understanding. Talk with both clients about their
intimacy and what works, what they want more of. Congratulate
honesty and ask for greater detail. Let them have space to share a
fantasy of romance or a particular action or environment they need
more of for trust and intimacy. If couple wants to speak separately,
then do so with permission from both people. Also, ask the wife or
husband for a five-minute chat before you speak to their partner so
they can tell you how to best advocate for their sexual needs. The
coach’s attitude should be, “I am happy to help them understand what
works for you more.” Often this can mean explaining emotional
foreplay to a man. For a woman, this may mean explaining bids and
offers and modalities where a man operates at his strongest.
9. Archetype process. With spouse present, conduct archetype

work. Allow the different parts of the person to speak and create unity
towards a goal and desire. Allow there to be a primary question which
is asked of each archetype. This can be done simultaneously with
both partners, or by taking turns with the individuals. Allow partners to
express what they like about the different archetypes. They may like
to create nicknames which will allow them to call up the archetypes
as needed. Sample questions could be, “How can I feel more
relaxed?” “How can I show her I love her?” “How do I trust more?”
“How can I be more vulnerable?”
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Coaching Plan 3: Self-Discovery Coaching
1. Get to know the client. Allow for any stories, key people,
emotions, worries, joys to emerge naturally in the first session. Keep
the focus on how positive it is to share so deeply, encourage and
congratulate honesty, be very interested. Learn as much as you can.
Elevate the person and find the good in what they are sharing with
you. Explain that in this series of sessions you will often work from
the outer layer of a person’s life, goals, desires, emotions and
behaviors towards the inner deeper and sometimes harder-to-realize
authentic person.
2. Life Zones. Create a chart of zones of life and emotions within

those zones. Make goals for emotions and actions in the different
zones. Understand the key players and patterns in the zones. Add
any desired zones of life like hobbies, friendships relationships. Allow
time to create a vision for how that will look and choose small easy
actions to take in those life zones. Strength finding process: use this if
it applies to help the person overcome a story about themselves or a
defeatist attitude.
3. Six human needs. Discuss how needs change and take

different priorities. What is important now was probably not so
important earlier in life, and it will not be later. Give the client a take-
away action of how to use their new discovery about needs. Talk
about how they experience this need in their day to day life, friends,
family and career.
4. Look at rules and tests the client has in their life, either for
themselves or others. How do they tie into meeting needs and having
the emotions they want? Talk about 3 Ps and apply them to the
different areas of life.
5. Communication with the self. What do your clients ask

themselves? How do they communicate their emotions, needs,
purpose with themselves and others? Can this be improved? How
would they like it to be? Write a letter to themselves in the past,
future, or to another person to help them be clear about their purpose
and their desired emotions/needs. (Help them if it is hard for them to
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express in spoken words.)
At what times in the day would it be helpful to state their purpose,

either to themselves or to others? Are there triggers which make
them forget their purpose? How can they outsmart the triggers?
Congratulate them for seeing their own triggers.
6. Create new patterns. How could repetitive daily practices help

them to connect with what they have learned? How can they connect
with their desired emotional state or? How and when can they use
these new practices?
7. Archetype process. The goal is to teach the client to use the

different parts of themselves as they need the different archetypes
characteristics. Relate archetypes to areas of life. Ask a question to
archetypes if it applies, or help archetypes to integrate and work
together. Introduce key decisions and how they may interact with
archetypes. Is there a need in life for a new key decision? Allow the
week to pass while this question is present for them.
8. Discuss a new key decision. How to integrate this decision?

Who it will affect in past, present, future? How will they plan and
make space for decision? Allow for dreaming time for future goals
and plans now that there is a strong foundation of understanding,
love and appreciation in the client for themselves, their strengths,
needs and life.
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My Coaching Message
Basic 5 Questions/Answers:
1. Who am I... 
2. What I do is... 
3. Who I do it for... 
4. What others need... 
5. How they change as a result...
Expanded: 
Who are you? (Person says their name.)
What do you love to do? Do you love to talk, teach, make art,
write programs, play with animals, create beauty, argue, debate,
stretch, dance, play chess, surf, clean teeth and the list goes on and
on... (Be with it, then tell me.)
What is the one thing right now you feel extremely ready
to help others with? (You have it, see it, feel it.)
Who do you do it for?    W hat do those people want or need

that they’ve come to you for? (Hold it, don’t release it.)
How do they change or transform as a result of what you

give them?
Put it together:
I am... 
I do... 
I do it for... 
These people need... 
How do they change as a result.
You have just gone from inward facing to outward facing in your
orientation. Most successful happy people focus on doing things for
others and making others happier. This then makes you happy.  The
result is that when you are asked by someone, what you do you say?
For instance: I help people find their purpose in life.
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I love my work because I’m always being inspired by what my clients
believe in and find meaningful.
Most people benefit hugely from a few sessions where they really
learn what is most meaningful to them in life.
This is your personal explanation of your practice that makes the

person you are talking to want to ask you a question about your life
purpose (or career) and how you do what you do.
Enrollment Conversation
The enrollment conversation is a free consultation where you meet
the prospective client, hear about and understand their needs, show
your understanding, and give them a sense of what you would do in
your coaching to help them.
Many professions use a free consultation: attorneys, financial

advisers, consultants of all kinds.
In this session, you give your advice freely, but it is also clear that
they have not yet retained your services.  
Presenting Your Coaching Package to a Potential

Client
Step 1: Find out in detail what they would like to improve in their
life.
What topics: Relationship, Life Transition, General Happiness, Focus,

Personal Understanding ...
Ask questions and become very knowledgeable about the client’s

needs and desires.
Step 2: Show your understanding of the client’s needs and

desires
Tell the potential client what you have heard them express as their
needs and desires for their life. You are looking for their confirmation:
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“yes, that’s what I want.”
Social proof: let them know that you have worked with clients in
similar situations and have brought them powerful benefits.
Step 3: Reframing
The purpose is to show that you understand their situation by

reframing it. The client has shared their personal information with
you. Here you give your preliminary sense of how you might help
them once you’re working together.
For instance, you can see their situation as reflecting a life stage, and
you can express that it’s their time. You can express it as a matter of
needs – and how to meet their needs in a higher-level way. If it’s a
relationship issue, you want to talk about developing skills to create
closer relationships.
Step 4: Explain the Coaching Process
Explain that you believe that through a series of coaching sessions

with you they can accomplish their goals or improve their relationship.
Be extremely clear about what they want to accomplish or gain
through coaching.
Explain the benefits to the client of committing to 6-10 sessions. You

can give an idea of what the sessions with you would focus on if they
choose to go through the coaching process with you.
Express your enthusiasm for working with them. All clients want a
coach that likes them. Be clear in yourself, though, you are not yet
their coach. In order to get you as their advocate, they need to cross
a line and hire you.
Step 5: Enrolling the Client
Once you have gone through these steps, the next step belongs to
the client.
Let them know they are the kind of client you help. They need to
know you like them.
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Tell them the coaching plan you suggest and what date you are
available to start. Be clear about your rate and package. This is the
time to be clear, firm and allow for a moment of hesitation or
discomfort. The client must step up at this moment and choose to
engage. It’s not your job to relieve them of this discomfort. If they
don’t remember this as their decision and commitment, your coaching
will be much less effective. Inexperienced coaches often rush in to fill
in the discomfort by connecting with the client. The client settles for
this temporary connection instead of enrolling in a longer plan of
action and change.
If the client says the price is too much for them, you can offer to
spread out payment over a number of weeks or month. Also, be clear
about the ideal way to proceed (meeting once a week, every other
week or once per month). If the client wishes to get “a deal” you can
offer them once a month instead of every week as a way to make the
coaching plan fit their budget.
Showing appreciation, genuine enthusiasm, and belief in the client is

the key to developing a FANTASTIC client - coach relationship from
the beginning.
An overview of what the client will receive through their

coaching using PearL Formula
• The formula can be applied in one session or can be used as a

framework for 5 or more sessions. Think of it as a strategy map for
increased well-being and happiness.
• All five components create the overall skills, understanding, actions,

and strategies to increase happiness for the individual.
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pearL Formula
Begin- Likes – Details which lead to all discovery and elevate the
client and the session by focusing on positive leverage 
Purpose – life zones, personal strengths, needs  

Emotions – 4 P’s, 21 Journeys™, Emotional Maturity Strategy
Actions – life zones, directives, outside of session
Relationships – expanding the unit  Start
Likes – start at the end of the Pearl
“Tell me what you like to do.” 

“Tell me how you like to feel.”
 “What do you like to do on the weekend?”
“What is your favorite part of your work day?”  
Purpose
Use the Six Human Needs to discover the most important need to
increase daily and create a purpose statement. Talk about Life Zones
or do full life zones strategy to discover an important or new zone to
increase happiness.
Often the client needs permission to value this part of

themselves.  Apply purpose to the client’s particular goal. This might
be relationship, work, action, or inner focused.  
Emotions
“How do you like to feel?” 

“What do you feel most often both good and bad feelings?”
“Would you like to do a simple exercise with me that helps you to
create an emotional focus in times that might be challenging? (Four
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P’s Strategy)”
You can also teach your client some of the 21 Journey’s Exercises to
change state and create Emotional Maturity Strategy.
Actions
In every SI Coaching session, we give the client a take home

experience to have. This could be a pretend strategy, a phone call
they make, something they practice like the Four P’s. Whatever
assignment you give them is a directive and it is about taking action
in their real life outside of the session.  
Relationships (Part of Expanding the Unit)
 “Tell me about the 6 most important people in your life.”

 “Who in your life has given you the most support?” 
“Who in your life feels tricky?”
 “Is there a person you would like to create a better relationship with?”
 “Is there a relationship you’d like to add to your life? Example: Sister
like, mentor, friend, someone similar to you, someone different, a
challenger, a peaceful presence?
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Before The First Session Welcome Kit
and Policy Forms
Please change as you need to in order to reflect
your policies and style as a coach
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Client Data Form
Date:   
Name:   
Occupation:   
Business Name:   
Preferred Address:   
E-Mail Address:   
Billing Address:   
Phone:   
Preferred means of communication:   
Date of birth:
Preferred coaching schedule:   d ay of week /   t ime of day
Important people in client’s life (spouse, partner, parents,

children, friends, etc.)
Emergency Contact:    H ow you heard about my coaching

services?
What has brought you to coaching? 

Have you ever been coached? If so, please describe your
experience.
Are their goals you have for coaching? If not, what areas
of life are you interested in creating goals within?
Explain your main roles and responsibilities day to day

(special relationships, duties, interests).
What parts of life do you enjoy the most?   
What seems to need the most improvement in your life?
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  H ow do you like to start your day?  
Life Coaching Agreement (change as needed)
Name
  I nitial term (months, sessions, etc.)
Fee per session 
Per month 
Per program 
First session date 
Duration of session
  D uration of coaching 
Referred by
Ground Rules: 
(Decide what applies to your practice)
1. How do we meet (in person, skype, phone)
2. Emails between sessions
3. Included members of family in sessions
4. Fees for cancellation
5. Emergency sessions  
1. As a client, I understand and agree that I am fully

responsible for my well-being during my coaching
calls, including my choices and decisions. I am aware
that I can choose to discontinue coaching at any
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time. I recognize that coaching is not psychotherapy,
medical advice, or psychiatric care and that
professional referrals will be given if needed.
2. I understand that “life coaching” is a relationship I

have with my coach that is designed to facilitate the
creation/development of personal, professional,
business, health, spiritual and other personal goals
and carry out a strategy/plan/action for achieving
those goals.
3. I understand that life coaching is comprehensive and

may involve exploration into all areas of my life,
including work, finances, health, spiritual,
relationships, education, and recreation. I
acknowledge that deciding how to handle these
issues and implement my choices is exclusively my
responsibility.
4. I understand that life coaching does not treat mental

disorders as defined by the American Psychiatric
Association. I understand that life coaching is not a
substitute for counseling, psychotherapy,
psychoanalysis, mental health care, or substance
abuse treatment, and I will not use it in place of any
form of therapy.
5. I promise that if I am currently in therapy or otherwise

under the care of a mental health professional, that I
have consulted with this person regarding the
advisability of working with a life coach and that this
person is aware of my decision to proceed with the
life coaching relationship.
6. I understand that the information will be held as

confidential unless I state otherwise in writing, except
as required by law.
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7. I understand that certain topics may be anonymously
shared with other life-coaching professionals for
training or consultation purposes.
8. I understand that life coaching is not to be used in

lieu of professional advice. I will seek professional
guidance for legal, medical, financial, business,
spiritual, or other matters. I understand that all
decisions in these areas are exclusively mine, and I
acknowledge that my decision and my actions
regarding them are my responsibility.
I have read and agreed to the above.
Client signature  
Date
The above coaching agreement acknowledgements come

from the book Therapist As Life Coach by Patrick Williams
and Deborah C. Davis. Please change as you need or are
advised to for legal reasons specific to your individual
practice, where you live, and other professions you may
have.
Before the first session with your client you may want to
ask them to send you an email with the following
information:
You may want to ask for a photograph of your client.
You may want to ask for a general letter from the client.
Below is an example of how to write this request.
Email:
I am really looking forward to our first session on

____________ day at _______time.
If you have time I would love to learn more about you.
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Please send me any highlights about you and your life that
you feel it is important for me to understand before we
begin coaching. You may write in any style and about any
part of your life. Let me know if what you are describing is
current, past or future information. If possible I would also
like a photograph of you.
Talk with you soon!
First Sessions
Understanding what energy drainers exist in a client’s life

can be very helpful to the client.
These might be expectations, emotions, relationships, lack

of skills, tendencies, etc.
Together you can list all Energy Drainers at work, home,

in social life or any other part of life which is a focus for
your session or general coaching.
Energy Drainers at Work:
Energy Drainers at Home:
Energy Drainers Related to Beliefs:
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Between Sessions Preparation Form
To get the most out of our coaching it is helpful to spend a few
minutes before each session preparing. Please email me the answers
to the following questions.
Coach - You may want to do this with client over phone or in person
instead of having this sent to you.
What I took action on since our last session (HW, Directive, Action
Step):
What I feel good about that I did between sessions (this might not
have been suggested during coaching but is significant):
What I didn’t get to but would like to be held accountable for:
Describe any important question, thought, happening or focus that

you want to explore this week in coaching:
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SI Boot Camp Home Study
Action Form 1: Life Focus and Life Story Session
Please answer the following questions about your first week of

training. This will be all you need to do each week in order to
graduate. Save your action forms and send them at the end of your
course to us in one file.
Name:
Date:
Life Focus and Life Story Session
Explain what your experience was as the client through answering

the following questions to whatever depth you feel comfortable
sharing.
Discoveries about areas of life, priorities as a client:
Explain how it felt to be the client using Life Story Exercise:
Goals you created during your session:
Commitments or HW Directives for your session as client:
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Session where you were the coach:
What I like most about being the coach:
What if anything felt challenging which I’d like to work on:
Discoveries and observations client made about parts of their life and
life story:
Coach Knowing that was discovered but not shared with client if any:
HW or Commitments asked of client for following week:
Thoughts on what you would explore in a second or third session with

this client:
125
Action Form 2: SI Success Zones and Strengths Process
Name:
Date:
SI Success Zones and Strengths Process
Explain what you learned about your client’s strengths:
Which Success Zone did you and client focus on:
List goals and understandings which were revealed during session as

coach:
What commitments/hw did you and client decide upon during your
session:
126
Action Form 3: Metaphor Strategy
Name:
Date:
Metaphor Strategy
Explain a metaphor your client used during your coaching time:
Explain a hw/directive you suggested or your coach suggested that

used metaphor as a reframing or empowering tool:
Share any metaphors that you have created to empower yourself in a

hard situation or in reference to some part of your life:
127
Action Form 4: Mode of Being Strategy
Name:
Date:
Mode Of Being Strategy
Explain what you learned about your client’s mode of being or several
common modes of being (linked to any roles, activities, interests):
Are there some emotions that are easier to have when in a specific
mode of being:
Share any modes of being which were enjoyed in the client’s past:
Explain how client might benefit from entering into a natural mode of
being in daily life now:
List goals and understandings which were revealed during session:
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What commitments/hw did you and client decide upon which will help
the client to get more out of their life by increasing a desired mode of
being:
129
Action Form 5: Emotional Balancing Strategies
Name:
Date:
Emotional Balancing Strategies
Give an example of “Getting Universal” with emotional pain:
When working with bringing an emotion closer what did you or your
client experience:
Were metaphors used to describe the intimate, gentle movement of

getting closer to an emotion? If so share which metaphors were used
by client or coach:
Try using the Emotional Maturity Strategy Steps and then share
which actions came to the client at the end of the process:
130
Action Form 6: Archetype Strategy
Name:
Date:
Archetype Strategy
Write down the question your partner or you chose to ask the different
archetypes:
Share any surprises or moments of clarity the archetypes expressed

during the session:
Is there one archetype you would like to show up more frequently in

your life? If so, which one and during what times of day, roles, or
parts of your life:
Write down a symbol, metaphor, or actual object that can remind you
to bring this archetype forward as an energy in your daily life
(examples: a smell, a toy, image of sunrise):
131
Action Form 7: Six Needs With Expanding The Unit Strategy
Name:
Date:
Six Needs With Expanding The Unit Strategy
The first step of this Strategy Practice is to find a key person in

client’s life they’d like to improve their relationship to.
1. Who did your client choose to focus on:
The second step is to explain to your client how understanding the

way we and another person meets their needs is very helpful to
creating a better relationship.
Go through each need with your client and learn how their key person
meets that need. These would be the vehicles the client’s key person
uses to meet his/her needs.
As you spend time with each need explore if your client has a way to
help their key person meet that need in a healthier way.
2. Give an example of one need in Key Person’s life and

how they currently meet it:
3. Give an example of how your client plans to help

them meet their need in a healthier way:
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There may be some needs that the client has no way of helping the
other person meet. However, to appreciate what may be going on for
the other person can be a tool for creating a greater sense of
connection. If your client finds they don’t know how the other person
meets their needs then help your client create questions to ask their
key person to understand them better. Also, plan when it would be
best to have these deeper conversations.
Healthier vehicles for meeting needs may include actions the client
takes in the form of words, gifts, appreciations, questions, activities
together, or time spend remembering the past with the key person.
4. Give an example of how you meet one need and

could improve the way you meet that need by doing
using a new vehicle. This can be an example you
share with clients of what you have done in your own
life.
Your Need and how you’ve improved your vehicle:
133
Action Form 8: Coach Business Planning
Name:
Date:
Coach Business Planning
30 DAY ACTIONS:
1. Action: Schedule clarity session lesson training (3 hours).
2. Action: Decide how many clients you want.
3. Action: Set up phone number, email, sign up link.
4. Action: Set up payment method.
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5. Action: Who will you inform in first 30 days?
CUSTOMIZE YOUR COACHING PRACTICE:
1. Monthly income per client
2. Clients per month
3. Clarity sessions per month
4. Outreach method
5. Track results
135
Action Form 9: The Four P’s Strategy
Name:
Date:
This strategy is best to use for situational stress
When working with this strategy with a client or fellow student answer
the following questions about your process.
Step 1: Purpose: Choosing a situational stressor in client’s life find

the purpose.
1. What purpose can client create for needing to be in

this situation:
Ex. Teacher is stressed by group meetings at her school. Her

purpose for attending the meetings at the deepest purpose level are
to help her students, grow in her communication and share her love
of growth with the parents, teachers and students.
Step 2: Posture: Have client take a supportive posture to her purpose.

How can the body assist to feel brave, smart, strong, wise, peaceful
whatever will help the client feel the purpose? Have client remember
how she normally is in her body posture when stressed about this
situation and then go to the new posture while speaking the purpose
to herself.
136
2. What posture will help her align with her purpose:
Step 3: Presence: Help the client find himself in the current or future
moment instead of the past. What wisdom truth helps them to know
they can now react differently to a situation. Ex. My fear or anxiety is
rooted in believing the past repeats but when I look closer I know this
isn’t true. The future can be completely new for myself and for the
others. Every moment is new and I can right now choose this
newness.
3. What does client say or remember to feel this

presence in themselves:
Ex. This could be a kinesthetic experience, words or images.
Extra Credit: 4 th P is Picture it

What picture helps client remember their new system for
being in the stressful situation so that now it is a
purposeful situation:
4. Directive: When you instructed client to practice the
Four P’s before they enter the challenging situation
what were the reminders or environment where they
would practice:
Ex. Car, outside building, restroom
Reminder: Make sure you ask client to also practice the Four P’s at
least two times a day for one week. This pretend will take the
unconscious fear or stress and turn it into an easy to handle and
empowering future pacing experience.
Warning: Do not use Four P’s for panic attacks or PTSD where it
would hurt client to recall the level of stress, anger, pain they enter
into.
137
Action Form 10: Coaching 360 Strategy
Name:
Date:
Coaching 360 Strategy
Giving a personality to an emotion client wishes to explore and

integrate.
What emotion did you choose to explore in yourself when being the
client:
What attributes/details did this emotion show you they had:
Now that you know this emotion as a person with likes, tastes, needs,
and so on how will your relationship to the emotion be different:
What will you remember about the highest intent of the emotion for
you:
138
What will you remember about the emotions purpose in your life:
Are there words, images, thoughts that will relax that emotion for
you? How can you turn to these thoughts if the emotions begins to
take over? Choose a directive to explain here which might include
memory, an actual object or image, pretend exercise or a dialogue
you can engage in:
Example of this is when a female client was working with overwhelm

using Coaching 360. She gave overwhelm the identity of the
incredible hulk but the hulk wore red high heels and lipstick. The hulk
needed attention, love and power so when she now becomes
overwhelmed she thinks of the hulk in heels. She laughs a bit and
can see what overwhelm wants below the surface. Her relationship to
a destructive emotion has become lighter and easier to integrate and
add too. She is playfully in control and can listen and accept the
emotion. Now she and overwhelm are metaphorically on the same
side of the fence.
139
Action Form 11: Six Needs
Name:
Date:
Six Needs
Six needs focus on 2 needs
What needs was your client focusing on?
What vehicles do they currently use to meet their need? The question
you’d ask, “what needs to happen for you to feel (need)?”
Old vehicle:
New vehicle:
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Brainstorm with client new ways to meet their needs which don’t
require others as much. This is a process of empowering client to
meet their needs in a healthy way. This might be through new
communications, actions, thoughts.
Explain any rules client has for meeting needs and new rules client
has created for meeting needs.
Old rule:
New rule:
141
Action Form 12: Key Decisions Strategy
Name:
Date:
Key Decisions Strategy
What Key Decision did your client share with you:
Explain how they understand that this decision was made with the
resources they had at the time:
Now that he/she has more resources what new decision are they
making:
142
How will their new Key Decision impact their life, those around them,
their future:
HW you have given them to do to remember and live with this new
decision:
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SI Boot Camp™ Training

This Training and all related materials, including educational,

1. Consent. You consent to Strategic Intervention, LLC and its

2. Grant of Rights; Waiver. YOU grant Us, and Our owners,

3. No Conflict. YOU warrant and represent that YOUR consents

4. Third Party Recordings. YOU understand that others, with or

5. Liability & Warranty Release. The Program and related materials,

6. Binding Agreement; Electric Signatures. This Agreement and the

Action Forms 124

Being Your Own Best Friend 98

Client Welcome Kit 117

Coaching 360 Strategy 85

Emotional Maturity Strategy Six Steps 89

Energy Repair for the Coach 99

Enrollment Conversation 112

Expand the Unit 70

Human Needs Strategy 64

Key Decisions Strategy 87

Life Story Strategy 33

Mode of Being Strategy 59

Overcoming Negative Patterns 101

Success Zones Strategy 44

The Four P’s Strategy 83

Using Stories In Coaching 102

Your Coaching Message 111

Your Coaching Practice Session Plan 104

Being Your Own Best Friend

Boundaries (Emotion, Energy)

Client Mind and Coach Mind

Client Welcome Kit with Forms

Coaching 360 Strategy

Coaching Package Plan

Crazy Eight Concept

Expanding The Unit

Finding The Spark

Getting Closer Strategy (Emotion)

Getting Resourceful (Emotion)

Getting Universal (Emotion) Goals

Relational Goals vs. Problems

Higher Consciousness Healing

Life Perspective Visualization

Life Stage Problem

Life Stage Reframe

Life Story Strategy

Life Zones (First Sessions)

Outline for Coaching Session: Likes, What’s Missing, Getting

Pearl Formula Strategy

Problems Based in Past

Reverse Engineering Strategy

Situational and Structural Goals

Six Human Needs Strategy

Six Steps Emotional Maturity Strategy

The Four P’s Strategy (Emotion)

Type of Client: Earth, Air, Fire and Water

Reframe- Use the following concepts and strategies to reframe a

Metaphor- Listen to client’s natural metaphorical language. You are

Rapport In Your Coaching Sessions

Matching speed of talking

Noticing where the client is looking

Body position mirroring

Energy and mood synchronization

Directives: Actions taken both internally and externally outside of

Coach Knowing: Sometimes the coach uses the strategies and

Being Your Own Best Friend  

Boundaries (Emotion, Energy)  

 Client Mind and Coach Mind

Coaching  360 Strategy 

Coaching Package Plan 

Crazy Eight Concept 

 Finding The Spark  

Getting Closer Strategy (Emotion)  

Getting Resourceful (Emotion)  

Getting Universal (Emotion)  Goals

Relational  Goals vs. Problems 

 Life Perspective Visualization

 Life Stage Problem

 Life Stage Reframe

Life Zones (First Sessions)  

 Outline for Coaching Session: Likes, What’s Missing, Getting

 Pearl Formula Strategy

 Problems Based in Past 

Reverse Engineering Strategy 

Situational and Structural Goals 

Six Human Needs Strategy 

Six Steps Emotional Maturity Strategy 

The Four P’s Strategy (Emotion) 

Type of Client: Earth, Air, Fire and Water 

• How is the client creating/enjoying meaning in their life) 

• Life Story Strategy 

• Using Metaphors and pretend 

• Taking small actions to create change (Directives) 

Air- Fast Changer (Also fast to quit and change back) 

Life Zones & goals 

  P ersonal Growth Activities  