I - Life Skills: Life Skills - Diploma V-SEM - English Lab Manual

Life Skills – Diploma V-SEM – English Lab Manual LAQSHYA
I - LIFE SKILLS
Introduction: Life skills are usually associated with managing and living a better
quality of life. They help us to accomplish our ambitions and live to our full potential.
Any skill that is useful in our lives can be considered a life skill. Life skills are the
skills we need to deal effectively with the challenges in everyday life, whether at
school, at work or in our personal lives. A skill is a learned ability to do something
well. Life skills are abilities, individuals can learn that will help them to live a fruitful
life. Life skills are defined as “Skills that help an individual be successful in living a
productive and satisfying life.”
Objectives:
 To understand and enhance Life Skills
 To live a fruitful life by acquiring skills set
 To deal effectively with everyday challenges in life
Essential Life Skills: Here the essential life skills that we are going to master are:
Enhancing self-esteem
Goal setting
Positive attitude
Managing emotions
Stress management
Time management
Interpersonal skills
Creativity
Problem solving and Decision making skills
Assertiveness
Leadership skills & Team spirit
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Importance of life skills:

In a constantly changing environment, having life skills is an essential part of being
able to meet the challenges of everyday life.
Benefits for the individual
 Find new ways of thinking and problem solving

 Recognize the impact of their actions and teaches them to take responsibility
for what they do rather than blame others
 Build confidence both in spoken skills and for group collaboration and
cooperation
 Analyze options, make decisions and understand why they make certain
choices outside the classroom
 Develop a greater sense of self-awareness and appreciation for others
Benefits for employment
 Employers were looking not just for academic success but key employability
skills.
 The ability to self-manage, solve problems and understand the business
environment
 Working well as part of a team
 Time and people management
 Agility and adaptability to different roles and flexible working environments
 The potential to lead by influence
Benefits for society
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The more we develop life skills individually, the more these affect and benefit the
world in which we live:
 Recognizing cultural awareness and citizenship makes international

cooperation easier
 Respecting diversity allows creativity and imagination to flourish developing a
more tolerant society
 Developing negotiation skills, the ability to network and empathise can help to
build resolutions rather than resentments
Developing Life Skills:
Assess Current Strengths
Assessing strengths, or creating a personal inventory, involves making a list of all

current skills and abilities no matter how small or fundamental. Everyone is good at
something. Examples of possible strengths could be as simple as I keep myself clean
and neat, I always try to do my best or I like to read, draw or do puzzles.
Outline Basic Beliefs and Values
Character - What we believe and what we value in life - provides a foundation for
building life skills. The word skill implies action. If we have a skill it means we can do
something. Therefore, developing life skills means putting our beliefs into action. If
our beliefs and values are solid and well-founded, effective life skills will be easier to
achieve. There are many values that could be considered. Examples of values on
which beliefs could be built and around which priorities could be set might include
honesty, respect, self-reliance, determination, wealth, power and fame.
Explore Current Barriers to Personal Growth
In addition to assessing strengths and outlining beliefs, current barriers to personal

growth must be eliminated or minimized. Possible barriers could include physical or
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mental challenges, addiction, lack of education and language or cultural differences.

It may not be easy but dealing with potential barriers up front will keep them from
becoming more of a problem in the future. Suggestions for overcoming barriers could
include finding a role model or reading about people who were successfully in spite
of similar barriers.
Respect Learning and Application Differences
Though similar in many ways, we all come from different backgrounds and
experiences, which can give each of us a very different perspective. We may also have
a different learning style and personality. Respecting differences makes it much
easier to personalize basic life skills and apply them to everyday situations.
Create a Plan
True success comes from within and basic life skills build on each other. Start by
building self-worth, self-confidence and self-control (personal strengths or skills).
Then add relationship skills (image/perception, anger management, cooperation),
using personal skills as a foundation. And finally, develop project skills (organization,
innovation), which incorporate both personal and relationship skills.
Focus on the Area of Control
Every person has an individual Area of Control. And knowing that each of us has the
final say with regard to our actions, reactions, emotions and attitude can be
empowering.
Keep It Simple and Be Flexible
When creating a personal plan for success, be sure to include patience, forgiveness
and flexibility. Fundamental changes take time. Build skills slowly, but deliberately.
Become more accepting of human frailties - in yourself and in others. Most people are
doing the best they can and everyone makes mistakes. Consider all mistakes as
learning experiences.
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Make changes in the plan as needed. If one thing doesn't work try another. What is
most important is that progress is being made. As long as you are accomplishing
goals and feel good about yourself, the plan is working. Be happy with your
successes.
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II: ENHANSING SELF-ESTEEM
Introduction: ‘Esteem' comes from a Latin word that means 'to estimate'. Self-
esteem is how we estimate, or regard, ourselves. Self-esteem is not the same as
confidence; we can appear confident publicly but inside we may feel worthless and
inadequate.
How do you regard yourself? Ask yourself the following questions.

 Do I like myself?
 Do I think I'm a decent person?
 Do I think I am worthy of love?
 Do I deserve happiness?
 Do I respect myself and expect others to treat me with respect?
 Am I able to say No to things I don’t want?
 Am I able to achieve the things I want to achieve on the whole?
 Do I feel I have power and control over my life?
 Do I take responsibility for my mistakes but not for other people’s mistakes?
People with low self-esteem find it hard to answer “yes” to these questions.
What causes low self-esteem?
 Multiple stressors: Stressful life events knock us temporarily and usually we

recover with some support and get back to life feeling reasonably OK about
ourselves.
 Physical ill-health: Our self-esteem is bound up with our physical wellbeing.
 Persistent negative regard from others: The way other people treat us can
also affect our self-esteem.
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 A sense of powerlessness: The more powerful we feel in our lives, the better
our self- esteem.
How can we improve your self-esteem?
Normalize low self-esteem – you are not alone: Recognize that some of the
most famous people despite having masses of confidence have low self-
esteem. Many actors and politicians suffer with depression and low self-
esteem despite performing exceptionally at their work. You are not alone!
Get your human frailty into perspective: Give yourself the right to be
human, to make mistakes. ‘To err is human' – in order to learn to walk we had
to make lots of mistakes, fall over, get up, and bump into things before we
mastered the art of walking – allow yourself to fall and get back up in all
aspects of learning and life.
Take control of your thoughts: Take note of your thoughts; most of us have
a range of thoughts flowing through our mind at varying speeds. Take time to
observe and write down your thoughts about yourself, both the positive and
negative thoughts that run through your head in different situations. Become
aware of them, take time when in different situations to notice the negative
thought processes and replace them with positive thoughts. If we tell
ourselves” I can’t do this”, “no-one likes me”, “I’m stupid”, “I’m going to fail”
then we will feel worthless, unlovable, and incapable and will begin to act
accordingly.
Techniques to improve self-esteem
 Keep a Thoughts and moods log: Use the thoughts diary attached to notice
your thoughts in response to a certain situation. Write your thoughts down
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and notice how those thoughts make you feel. Now go back and consider how
you might reframe more positively your thinking regarding the situation in
hand and notice how this makes you feel.
 Use positive affirmations: Having participated in using your thoughts diary

notice the areas where you tend to think negatively. Create or borrow some
positive affirmations to counteract these negative beliefs and practice saying
them to yourself over and over each day. You may like to begin by looking in
the mirror each morning and repeating the affirmations or sticking them on
post-its around your room.
 Make time for yourself each day: People with low self-esteem often neglect
their need to relax and support themselves as they are too busy trying to
prove to themselves and others that they are good enough.
 Focus on the positive: Often we make ourselves unhappy because we focus

on the mistakes we have made. We can improve our self-esteem by focusing
on what we did well. People with low self-esteem don’t need to spend time
focusing on the mistakes as they will stick in your mind all too easily.
Distorted Thought patterns:
1. All or nothing thinking:

You look at things in absolute, black and white categories.
2. Overgeneralizations:
You view a negative event as a never-ending pattern.
3. Mental Filter:
You dwell on the negatives and ignore the positives.
4. Discounting the positives:

You insist that your accomplishments or positive qualities don’t count.
5. Jumping to conclusions:
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You conclude things are bad without any definite evidence: Mind Reading:
You assume people are viewing you negatively. Fortune Telling: you predict
that things will turn out badly.
6. Magnifications or minimization:
You blow things out of proportion or you shrink your importance.
7. Emotional reasoning:
You reason from how you feel – I feel like an idiot so therefore I am an idiot.
8. Should statements:
You criticize yourself or other people with “shoulds”, “oughts” and “musts”.
9. Labeling:
Instead of saying “I made a mistake” you tell yourself “I’m an idiot or a loser”.
10. Blame:
You blame yourself for something you weren’t responsible for or you blame
other people and overlook ways in which you contributed to the problem.
Positive Affirmations: Choose some of the following affirmations or create your

own and use them a s a mantra each day. You could take the time you travel to
University to repeat them over and over or alternatively look in the mirror and tell
yourself these things as you brush your teeth in the morning.
 I am a truly unique individual

 I can be happy and successful
 I have the power to manage my life
 I can make my own choices and decisions
 I am free to choose to live as I wish and to give priority to my desires.
 I can manage my thoughts and feelings.
 I do the best I can at any given moment.
 I am loveable and valuable.
 I love my body just the way it is.
 It is okay for me to make mistakes.
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III: GOAL SETTING
Introduction: Goal setting is a formal process for personal planning. By setting goals
on a regular basis you decide what you want to achieve, and then step-by-step move
towards the achievement of these goals. The process of setting goals and targets
allows you to choose where you want to go in life. By knowing precisely what you
want to achieve, you know what you have to concentrate on to do it. Goal setting is a
standard technique used by top-level athletes, business-people and achievers in all
fields. It gives you long-term vision and short-term motivation. It focuses your
acquisition of knowledge and helps you to organize your resources.
By setting sharp, clearly defined goals, you can measure and take pride in the
achievement of those goals. You can see forward progress in what might previously
have seemed a long pointless grind. By setting goals, you will also raise your self-
confidence, as you recognize your ability and competence in achieving the goals that
you have set. The process of achieving goals and seeing this achievement gives you
confidence that you will be able to achieve higher and more difficult goals.
Goals are set on a number of different levels:
Firstly you decide what you want to do with your life and what large-scale goals
you want to achieve.
Then you break these down into the smaller and smaller targets that you must
hit so that you reach your lifetime goals.
Finally, once you have your plan, you start working towards achieving it.
Starting to Set Personal Goals
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Start with your lifetime goals, and then work through a series of lower level plans
culminating in a daily to-do list. By setting up this structure of plans you can break
even the biggest life goal down into a number of small tasks that you need to do each
day to reach the lifetime goals.
Your Lifetime Goals
The first step in setting personal goals is to consider what you want to achieve in
your lifetime - setting Lifetime goals gives you the overall perspective that shapes all
other aspects of your decision making.
To give a broad, balanced coverage of all important areas in your life, try to set goals
in some or all of the following categories:
 Artistic: Do you want to achieve any artistic goals? If so, what?

 Attitude: Is any part of your mindset holding you back? Is there any part of
the way that you behave that upsets you? If so, set goals to improve or cure
the problem.
 Career: What level do you want to reach in your career?
 Education: Is there any knowledge you want to acquire in particular? What
information and skills will you need to achieve other goals?
 Family: Do you want to be a parent? If so, how are you going to be a good
parent? How do you want to be seen by a partner or by members of your
extended family?
 Financial: How much do you want to earn by what stage?
 Physical: Are there any athletic goals you want to achieve, or do you want
good health deep into old age? What steps are you going to take to achieve
this?
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 Pleasure: How do you want to enjoy yourself? - you should ensure that
some of your life is for you!
 Public Service: Do you want to make the world a better place by your
existence? If so, how?
Once you have decided your goals in these categories, assign a priority to them from
A to F. Then review the goals and re-prioritize until you are satisfied that they reflect
the shape of the life that you want to lead. Also ensure that the goals that you have set
are the goals that you want to achieve, not what your parents, spouse, family, or
employers want them to be.
How to Start to Achieve Your Lifetime Goals
Once you have set your lifetime goals, set a 25 year plan of smaller goals that you
should complete if you are to reach your lifetime plan. Then set a 5 year plan, 1 year
plan, 6 month plan, and 1 month plan of progressively smaller goals that you should
reach to achieve your lifetime goals. Each of these should be based on the previous
plan.
Finally set a daily ‘to do list’ of things that you should do today to work towards your
lifetime goals. At an early stage these goals may be to read books and gather
information on the achievement of your goals. This will help you to improve the
quality and realism of your goal-setting.
Finally review your plans, and make sure that they fit the way in which you want to
live your life.
Keeping to your goals: Once you have decided your first set of plans, keep the
process going by reviewing and updating your to-do list on a daily basis. Periodically
review the longer term plans, and modify them to reflect your changing priorities
and experience.
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Setting Goals Effectively: The following broad guidelines will help you to set
effective goals:
State each goal as a positive statement in the first person: - 'Execute this
technique well' is a much better goal than 'don't make this stupid mistake'
Be precise: set a precise goal, putting in dates, times and amounts so that
you can measure achievement. If you do this, you will know exactly when
you have achieved the goal, and can take complete satisfaction from having
achieved it.
Set priorities: where you have several goals, give each a priority. This helps
you to avoid feeling overwhelmed by too many goals, and helps to direct
your attention to the most important ones.
Write goals down: this crystallizes them and gives them more force.
Keep operational goals small: keep the low-level goals you are working
towards small and achievable. If a goal is too large, then it can seem that
you are not making progress towards it. Keeping goals small and
incremental gives more opportunities for reward. Derive today's goals
from larger ones.
Set performance goals, not outcome goals: you should take care to set goals
over which you have as much control as possible. There is nothing more
dispiriting than failing to achieve a personal goal for reasons beyond your
control. These could be bad business environments, poor judging, bad
weather, injury, or just plain bad luck. If you base your goals on personal
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performance, then you can keep control over the achievement of your
goals and draw satisfaction from them.
Set realistic goals: it is important to set goals that you can achieve. All sorts
of people (parents, media, society) can set unrealistic goals for you. They
will often do this in ignorance of your own desires and ambitions.
Alternatively you may be naïïve in setting very high goals. You might not
appreciate either the obstacles in the way, or understand quite how many
skills you must master to achieve a particular level of performance. But
remember that being ‘realistic’ shouldn’t prevent you from ‘thinking big’.
Do not set goals too low: just as it is important not to set goals
unrealistically high, do not set them too low. People tend to do this where
they are afraid of failure or where they are lazy! You should set goals so
that they are slightly out of your immediate grasp, but not so far that there
is no hope of achieving them.
Achieving Goals: When you have achieved a goal, take the time to enjoy the
satisfaction of having done so. Absorb the implications of the goal achievement, and
observe the progress you have made towards other goals. If the goal was a significant
one, reward yourself appropriately.
With the experience of having achieved this goal, review the rest of your goal plans:
If you achieved the goal easily, make your next goals harder
If the goal took too long to achieve make the next goals a short term one If
you learned something that would lead you to change other goals, do so
If while achieving the goal you noticed a deficit in your skills, decide whether to
set goals to fix this.
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IV – POSITIVE ATTITUDE
Introduction: A positive attitude can impact every aspect of your life. People who
maintain a positive approach to life situations and challenges will be able to move
forward more constructively than those who become stuck in a negative attitude.
Your mental and physical health can be improved by learning how to hold a positive
state of mind.
What is attitude?
An attitude, as defined by the Merriam-Webster Dictionary website, "is a mental
position with regard to a fact or state; a feeling or emotion toward a fact or state."
Positive or Negative: The word "positive" can be used as "having a good effect;
favorable; marked by optimism." When you demonstrate a positive attitude,
therefore, you are optimistic and expect favorable outcomes. In contrast to a person
with a sunny, positive outlook on life is the person who has a negative attitude. A
person with a negative attitude may be disagreeable, withdrawn, hostile or simply
pessimistic. Depression can impact a person's sleep patterns, activity levels, general
motivation and work habits, weight and even lead to thoughts of death or suicide.
Why Positive Attitude:
A Positive Attitude Leads to Success and Happiness. A positive attitude helps you
cope more easily with the daily affairs of life. It brings optimism into your life, and
makes it easier to avoid worries and negative thinking. If you adopt it as a way of life,
it would bring constructive changes into your life, and makes them happier, brighter
and more successful. With a positive attitude you see the bright side of life, become
optimistic, and expect the best to happen. It is certainly a state of mind that is well
worth developing. A positive attitude leads to happiness and success and can change
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your whole life. If you look at the bright side of life, your whole life becomes filled
with light. This light affects not only you and the way you look at the world, but it also
affects your environment and the people around you. If this attitude is strong enough,
it becomes contagious. It's as if you radiate light around you.
Positive attitude manifests in the following ways:

 Positive thinking.
 Constructive thinking.
 Creative thinking.
 Optimism.
 Motivation and energy to do things and accomplish goals.
 An attitude of happiness.
A positive frame of mind can help you in many ways, such as:
 Expecting success and not failure.
 Making you feel inspired.
 It gives you the strength not to give up, if you encounter obstacles on your
way.
 It makes you look at failure and problems as blessings in disguise.
 Believing in yourself and in your abilities.
 Enables you to show self-esteem and confidence.
 You look for solutions, instead of dwelling on problems.
 You see and recognize opportunities.
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Here is a list of 10 habits that can turn a gloomy outlook into an effortlessly
optimistic attitude.
1. Keep a gratitude journal.
Sometimes one single event can ruin an entire day and an unpleasant interaction or
experience at night can overshadow the enjoyable parts of our day. With this
awareness that our mind tends to cling to the negative, we can intentionally focus on
the good parts of our day to offset this imbalance. Try writing down 5 things that you
feel grateful for every day and see how your attitude changes. Science has found that
gratitude can significantly increase your happiness, and protect you from stress,
negativity, anxiety and depression.
2. Reframe your challenges.
There are no dead ends, only re-directions. Although we might try, there are very few
things in life that we have complete control over. We should not let uncontrollable
occurrences from the outside turn our inner to mush. What we can control is the
effort that we put in and when we give our full effort, there is no reason for regret.
Have fun with challenges; embrace them as adventures instead of attempting to resist
an experience for growth.
3. Get good at being rejected.
Rejection is a skill. Chalk every broken heart and failed job interview as practice
because no one gets to slide through life without being rejected. Don’t let it harden
you and don’t expect the worse. If you wait for bad things to happen, chances are it
will or you’ll narrow in on the bad in the midst of the many good things you’ve
missed along the way. When there are cracks in your heart, they let the sun in.
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4. Use positive words to describe your life.
The words that we use have a lot more power than we think. How you talk about
your life is how your life will be. Your mind hears what you say. If you describe your
life as boring, busy, mundane, chaotic, that is how you will perceive it and you will
feel the effects in your body and mind. If you use the words simple, involved, familiar
or lively, you will see your life in a whole different light and find more enjoyment in
the way you chose to shape your life.
5. Replace have with get.
Do you ever notice how many times we say that we have to do something? I have to
go to work. I have to go grocery shopping. I have to pay my rent. Now change this one
little word to get and see what happens. I get to go to work. I get to go grocery
shopping. Even, I get to pay my rent. Your attitude quickly changes from needing to
fulfill obligations to being grateful for the things that we become accustomed to
having: a job to support you and your family, food on the table, and a roof over your
head. Try to make this change when you are thinking to yourself and you may feel
and appear happier and less stressed.
6. Don’t let yourself get dragged into other people’s complaints.
Your day was going pretty well and then you get to work and your co-worker can’t
stop complaining about the cold weather. You didn’t really think about it before
he/she brought it up and now you find yourself agreeing and joining in on the
complaint-fest of how sick you are of this cold weather. In a month you’ll be pulled
into complaints about how it’s too hot. Don’t fall into the trap. A study done in Social
Psychology shows that complaining leads to lower moods and negative emotions,
decreased life satisfaction and optimism, and emotional and motivational deficits.
You might find that your co-worker will complain less without the validation of
someone else having the same complaint.
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7. Breathe.
Our breath is directly connected to our emotions. Have you noticed we hold our
breath sometimes when we are concentrating on something? Can you feel your
breath change when you are angry or anxious? Our breath changes depending on
how we feel. The great news is that the connection goes the other way too. We can
also change how we feel using our breath! Check out this infographic on the scientific
benefits of breathing.
8. Notice the righteous in times of tragedy.
It’s hard to have hope and stay positive when hate and violence is all over the media.
What we don’t see as much is that in every instance of natural disasters, war,
traumatic experience, you will find people rising up, reaching out to each other and
showing raw compassion and love. Hold onto the stories of modern day heroes and
selflessness in the times of fear and devastation.
9. Have solutions when pointing out problems.
Being positive doesn’t mean that you have to be oblivious to problems. Positive
people have constructive criticisms to improve conditions. If you are going to point
out problems in people or situations, place just as much effort into suggesting
solutions. Instead of pointing out all of the things that are wrong, offer ways to make
it better.
10. Make someone else smile.
Who do you think about most of the time? If we answered honestly, most of us would
say themselves. It’s good to hold ourselves accountable, take responsibility for our
life roles, hygiene, food, etc. but set a goal for each day to make someone else smile.
Think about someone else’s happiness and it will help us to realize our immense
impact that our attitude and expression has on the people around us.
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V – MANAGING EMOTIONS
Introduction: Emotions are our feelings. We feel them in our bodies. There are
cognitive aspects, but the physical sensation is what makes them really different. A
basic of much emotional arousal is that there is a goal at stake somewhere. Our
emotions thus cause us to want and not want. And when we have what we wanted,
we then have emotions about owning it.
Emotions often lead to coping activities. When we feel something, we consequently

respond to that feeling. This can be both in the immediate (and often subconscious)
response to the feeling and also in the more thoughtful handling of the aftermath.
Where this has been a negative feeling, the response may range from vigorous
justification of our actions to conciliatory apologies and other
'making up'. A common response to the repression of unwanted emotions is
displacement, where we act out our frustration in other ways. Thus a
reprimanded child, knowing they cannot answer back, may go and 'punish' their
toys. Emotions affect and are a part of our mood, which is usually a more sustained
emotional state. Mood affects our judgment and changes how we process decisions.
 Emotions of wanting:
Anticipation
Greed
Hope
Envy
Desire
Love
 Emotions of not wanting:
Fear
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Shame
Repulsion
Contentment
Anxiety
 Emotions of having:
Happiness
Pride
Guilt
Jealousy
 Emotions of not having:
Anger
Sadness
Distress
 Other mind-changing emotions:
Contempt
Surprise
Arousal
Importance of Emotions
Here are a few of the reasons our emotions are important in our lives.
Survival
Nature developed our emotions over millions of years of evolution. As a result, our
emotions have the potential to serve us today as a delicate and sophisticated internal
guidance system. Our emotions alert us when natural human need is not being met.
For example, when we feel lonely, our need for connection with other people is
unmet. When we feel afraid, our need for safety is unmet. When we feel rejected, it is
our need for acceptance which is unmet.
Decision Making
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Our emotions are a valuable source of information. Our emotions help us make
decisions. Studies show that when a person's emotional connections are severed in
the brain, he cannot make even simple decisions. Why? Because he doesn't know how
he will feel about his choices.
Predicting Behavior
Our feelings are also useful in helping us predict our own, and others' behavior. Here
is an article on the idea that feelings predict behavior.
Boundary Setting
When we feel uncomfortable with a person's behavior, our emotions alert us. If we
learn to trust our emotions and feel confident expressing ourselves we can let the
person know we feel uncomfortable as soon as we are aware of our feeling. This will
help us set our boundaries which are necessary to protect our physical and mental
health.
Communication
Our emotions help us communicate with others. Our facial expressions, for example,
can convey a wide range of emotions. If we look sad or hurt, we are signaling to
others that we need their help. If we are verbally skilled we will be able to express
more of our emotional needs and thereby have a better chance of filling them. If we
are effective at listening to the emotional troubles of others, we are better able to
help them feel understood, important and cared about.
Happiness
The only real way to know that we are happy is when we feel happy. When we feel
happy, we feel content and fulfilled. This feeling comes from having our needs met,
particularly our emotional needs. We can be warm, dry, and full of food, but still
unhappy. Our emotions and our feelings let us know when we are unhappy and when
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something is missing or needed. The better we can identify our emotions, the easier
it will be to determine what is needed to be happy.
Unity
Our emotions are perhaps the greatest potential source of uniting all members of the
human species. Clearly, our various religious, cultural and political beliefs have not
united us. Far too often, in fact, they have tragically and even fatally divided us.
Emotions, on the other hand, are universal. Charles Darwin wrote about this years
ago in one of his lesser-known books called "The Expression of Emotion In Man and
Animal". The emotions of empathy, compassion, cooperation, and forgiveness, for
instance, all have the potential to unite us as a species. It seems fair to say that,
generally speaking: Beliefs divide us. Emotions unite us.
Emotion management strategies
So what are the best strategies for managing emotions? And how do we avoid
reactive outbursts and manage emotions effectively in the moment?
Here are 10 simple strategies for managing emotions and tapping into your body and
brain’s capacity for shifting negative emotions into a more positive or calm mood.
1. Smile to make yourself feel good. Find a mirror, make it fun. If it doesn’t feel
right to start with, you will soon be laughing at yourself and feel better
naturally. The muscles we use to smile will tell our brain we are happy. Do it
for at least 30 seconds.
2. Smile to make others feel good. Create that connection, open
communication, trigger those mirror brain cells that make us experience
empathy for others.
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3. Get up and move. Jump around. It is important to move our lymph nodes to
get toxins out of our body. Our lymphatic system doesn’t have muscles to get it
moving; it works when we move other parts of our body and allow gravity to
massage it. Bouncing is the best way. Raising our arms generates the release of
hormones under our armpits – often referred to as ‘happy hormones’. Again,
this will tell our brain we are happy and make us feel better. Get up from your
desk regularly.
4. Check in with your body. Do a body scan. Take note of where you are holding
tension and your overall physiology. Relate these tensions and changes to the
emotion you are feeling to begin to understand where and how different
emotions affect you.
5. Physically remove the tension. If you feel tense in the arms, shake your
arms; if you feel tight in your chest, stretch and expand or breathe deeply.
6. Breathe. Take 6 deep diaphragmatic breaths. Our body cannot sustain anger
through deep breathing. Let the lower lungs have that oxygen to pass around
your body and brain. This will calm you and flood you with oxygen. You may
feel tingly. Do it for at least 60 seconds.
7. Talk to someone. Express your feelings to begin to resolve the situation. Vent
to a friend or colleague rather than suppress emotions.
8. Disengage and re-engage emotions. Park a challenging emotion to deal with
later, rather than just avoiding it. Acknowledge and accept the feeling then use
your emotional intelligence to help generate a more useful emotion.
Page 24
9. Label your emotion. The part of the brain that can label or name an emotion
is the same part that ‘feels’ the emotion. Labeling is proven to reduce the
intensity. Just by saying “I feel angry” you actually feel less angry.
10. Label emotions for others. We can often disarm an emotionally charged
situation by acknowledging what people are feeling. “I sense you are angry,
can you tell me how you feel?” This encourages others to consider and label
their emotions with greater accuracy: “Yes, I feel angry” or “No, I am not angry,
I am annoyed”.
RAJA RAO PAGIDIPALLI Page 25

VII – STRESS MANAGEMENT
Introduction: We all feel stress at one time or another. It's a normal and healthy
reaction to change or a challenge. But stress that goes on for more than a few weeks
can affect your health. Keep stress from making you sick by learning healthy ways to
manage it. Stress is a normal psychological and physical reaction to the ever-
increasing demands of life.
In looking at the causes of stress, remember that your brain comes hard-wired with
an alarm system for your protection. When your brain perceives a threat, it signals
your body to release a burst of hormones to fuel your capacity for a response. This
has been labeled the "fight-or-flight" response. Once the threat is gone, your body is
meant to return to a normal relaxed state. Unfortunately, the nonstop stress of
modern life means that your alarm system rarely shuts off. That's why stress
management is so important. Stress management gives you a range of tools to reset
your alarm system. Without stress management, all too often your body is always on
high alert. Over time, high levels of stress lead to serious health problems. Don't wait
until stress has a negative impact on your health, relationships or quality of life. Start
practicing a range of stress management techniques today.
What is stress management? We all respond to stress differently so, there’s no “one
size fits all” solution to managing stress. But if you feel like the stress in your life is
out of control, it’s time to take action. Stress management can teach you healthier
ways to cope with stress, help you reduce its harmful effects, and prevent stress from
spiraling out of control again in the future.
No matter how powerless you may feel in the face of stress, you still have control over
your lifestyle, thoughts, emotions, and the way you deal with problems. Stress

management involves changing the stressful situation when you can, changing your
reaction when you can’t, taking care of yourself, and making time for rest and
relaxation. The first step is to recognize the true sources of stress in your life.
Sources of Stress:
It’s easy to identify sources of stress following a major life event such as changing
jobs, moving home, or losing a loved one, but pinpointing the sources of everyday
stress can be more complicated. It’s all too easy to overlook your own thoughts,
feelings, and behaviors that contribute to your stress levels. Sure, you may know that
you’re constantly worried about work deadlines, but maybe it’s your procrastination,
rather than the actual job demands, that is causing the stress.
To identify your true sources of stress, look closely at your habits, attitude, and
excuses:
 Do you explain away stress as temporary (“I just have a million things going on
right now”) even though you can’t remember the last time you took a breather?
 Do you define stress as an integral part of your work or home life (“Things are
always crazy around here”) or as a part of your personality (“I have a lot of
nervous energy, that’s all”)?
 Do you blame your stress on other people or outside events, or view it as entirely
normal and unexceptional?
Until you accept responsibility for the role you play in creating or maintaining it, your
stress level will remain outside your control.
LEARN TO RECOGNIZE STRESS
The first step in managing stress is recognizing it in your life. Everyone feels stress in
a different way. You may get angry or irritable, lose sleep, or have headaches or

stomach upset. What are your signs of stress? Once you know what signals to look
for, you can start to manage it.
Also identify the situations that cause you stress. These are called stressors. Your
stressors could be family, work, relationships, money, or health problems. Once you
understand where your stress is coming from, you can come up with ways to deal
with your stressors.
There are many healthy ways to manage stress. Try a few and see which ones
work best for you.
 Recognize the things you can't change. Accepting that you can't change certain
things allows you to let go and not get upset. For instance, you cannot change the fact
that you have to drive during rush hour. But you can look for ways to relax during your
commute, such as listening to a podcast or book.
 Avoid stressful situations. When you can, remove yourself from the source of stress.
For example, if your family squabbles during the holidays, give yourself a breather and
go out for a walk or drive.
 Get exercise. Getting physical activity every day is one of the easiest -- and best -- ways
to cope with stress. When you exercise, your brain releases chemicals that make you feel
good. It can also help you release built-up energy or frustration. Find something you
enjoy -- whether it is walking, cycling, softball, swimming, or dancing -- and do it for at
least 30 minutes on most days.
 Change your outlook. Try to develop a more positive attitude toward challenges. You
can do this by replacing negative thoughts with more positive ones. For example, rather
than thinking, "Why does everything always go wrong?" change this thought to, "I can
find a way to get through this." It may seem hard or silly at first, but with practice you
may find it helps turn your outlook around.
 Do something you enjoy. When stress has you down, do something you enjoy to help
pick you up. It could be as simple as reading a good book, listening to music, watching a

favorite movie, or having dinner with a friend. Or, take up a new hobby or class.
Whatever you choose, try to do at least one thing a day that's just for you.
 Learn new ways to relax. Practicing relaxation techniques is a great way to handle
daily stress. Relaxation techniques help slow your heart rate and lower your blood
pressure. There are many types, from deep breathing and meditation to yoga and tai
chi. Take a class, or try learning from books, videos, or online sources.
 Connect with loved ones. Do not let stress get in the way of being social. Spending
time with family and friends can help you feel better and forget about your stress.
Confiding in a friend may also help you work out your problems.
 Get enough sleep. Getting a good night's sleep can help you think more clearly and
have more energy. This will make it easier to handle any problems that crop up. Aim for
about 7 to 9 hours each night.
 Eat a healthy diet. Eating healthy foods helps fuel your body and mind. Skip the high-
sugar snack foods and load up on vegetables, fruits, whole grains, low-fat or nonfat
dairy, and lean proteins.
 Learn how to say “no” – Know your limits and stick to them. Whether in your
personal or professional life, taking on more than you can handle is a surefire
recipe for stress. Distinguish between the “shoulds” and the “musts” and, when
possible, say “no” to taking on too much.
 Avoid people who stress you out – If someone consistently causes stress in
your life, limit the amount of time you spend with that person, or end the
relationship.
 Take control of your environment – If the evening news makes you anxious,
turn off the TV. If traffic makes you tense, take a longer but less-traveled route. If
going to the market is an unpleasant chore, do your grocery shopping online.
 Express your feelings instead of bottling them up. If something or someone
is bothering you, be more assertive and communicate your concerns in an open
and respectful way. If you’ve got an exam to study for and your chatty roommate
just got home, say up front that you only have five minutes to talk. If you don’t
voice your feelings, resentment will build and the stress will increase.

 Be willing to compromise. When you ask someone to change their behavior, be

willing to do the same. If you both are willing to bend at least a little, you’ll have
a good chance of finding a happy middle ground.
 Manage your time better. Poor time management can cause a lot of stress. But
if you plan ahead and make sure you don’t overextend yourself, you’ll find it
easier to stay calm and focused.
 Reframe problems. Try to view stressful situations from a more positive
perspective. Rather than fuming about a traffic jam, look at it as an opportunity
to pause and regroup, listen to your favorite radio station, or enjoy some alone
time.
 Look at the big picture. Take perspective of the stressful situation. Ask yourself
how important it will be in the long run. Will it matter in a month? A year? Is it
really worth getting upset over? If the answer is no, focus your time and energy
elsewhere.
 Adjust your standards. Perfectionism is a major source of avoidable stress.
Stop setting yourself up for failure by demanding perfection. Set reasonable
standards for yourself and others, and learn to be okay with “good enough.”
 Don’t try to control the uncontrollable. Many things in life are beyond our
control—particularly the behavior of other people. Rather than stressing out
over them, focus on the things you can control such as the way you choose to
react to problems.
 Look for the upside. When facing major challenges, try to look at them as
opportunities for personal growth. If your own poor choices contributed to a
stressful situation, reflect on them and learn from your mistakes.
 Learn to forgive. Accept the fact that we live in an imperfect world and that
people make mistakes. Let go of anger and resentments. Free yourself from
negative energy by forgiving and moving on.
 Set aside relaxation time. Include rest and relaxation in your daily schedule.
Don’t allow other obligations to encroach. This is your time to take a break from
all responsibilities and recharge your batteries.

 Do something you enjoy every day. Make time for leisure activities that bring
you joy, whether it be stargazing, playing the piano, or working on your bike.
 Keep your sense of humor. This includes the ability to laugh at yourself. The
act of laughing helps your body fight stress in a number of ways.

VII – TIME MANAGEMENT
What is Time Management? Planning and organising your time in order to use
appropriately and efficiently. This is not just time at work, but also time at college
and at home. It is an exercise in self-discipline and you are the key to success. If you
think you are self-disciplined, then aim to build on existing strengths to achieve
improvement. If not, then consider how your level of discipline influences you at
work, college and home. Think about how people perceive you and try to change old
habits.
A common response to time management is 'I haven't got control over how all my
time is spent'. This is quite true for everyone, but you can be aware of what you
spend your time on and then apply 3 tests.
Necessity (is what you are doing really necessary, or are you doing it because it
is nice/easy)
Appropriateness (should you be doing the task)
Efficiency (are you doing it the best way)
Why Manage Your Time: Because it is limited you should aim:
 To achieve more in the time available and get greater satisfaction from it
 To increase productivity or output, which is a key issue in the assessment
of people at work
 To reduce time wasted
 To make the best use of your time
 To make the best use of your high energy time
 To overcome bad habits

 To reduce pressure and stress, through planning
To be economical, TIME IS MONEY
MAKE IT SMART(ER) NOT HARDER
Few of us will reach the “stars” on our first attempt, so we need to plan to progress
towards our goals and like the Harvard graduates, set milestones for achievement
along the way. We can do this by breaking our goals into a series of long, medium and
short term objectives.
Short Term Objectives
(1 week - 6 months)
will lead to
Medium Term Objectives
(6 months - 2 years)
will lead to

Long Term Objectives
(2 years +)
Fear of failure may, to some extent, be overcome by turning a long term plan into a
number of short and medium term objectives, which are in themselves less radical
and thus less frightening and threatening. An example of this could be learning to fly,
a daunting task by any stretch of the imagination. But let’s break it down, using the
model outlined above.
Once you have considered your own personal strengths, weaknesses, opportunities
and threats, as well as some external factors, it will now be time to break the goals of
your job into more manageable objectives. Like everything else, these must be clearly
defined in order for effective time management. Objectives must always be
SMARTER.
 Specific and Stretching

 Measurable: use %, £, $, units?
 Achievable
 Realistic
 Time-bound: deadlined?
 Environment: what’s happening now?
 Review: when will you review your progress
By using this formula, we can break down long term strategic goals at a personal or
professional level, and focus how we are going to get there tactically and
operationally.

Time-Management Strategies
 Time-management is a vital skill, one that will be necessary in your chosen

career as well as in university. People have different time clocks and what
works for one student might not work for you.
 The following are some time-management strategies that you may want to
incorporate into your time-management routine. Test them out to see what
works and what doesn’t work for you. It might be a good idea to start by
monitoring and reflecting on how you currently use your time.
First, some basic strategies:
1. Prioritize! You probably have a lot of things to do, so assess how important
and how urgent the tasks are; then make sure high priority tasks get done first
and are not put off on a regular basis. Avoid time wasters!
2. Be specific! Make the task as specific as possible - we tend to follow through
then, especially if we write it down. For example, instead of telling yourself
“I’ll do some statistics this week,” try “I’ll do 3 descriptive statistics problems
Tuesday at 7pm.”
3. Small bite-size pieces! It’s easy to feel overwhelmed, so try breaking tasks
down into smaller sub-tasks. Once you’ve started it’s easier to keep going.
4. Use all available time! This is an especially good strategy if you are pressed
for time. You don’t necessarily need a block of time in order to study.
Students often have time between classes, travel time, etc. There are lots of
study tasks that can be accomplished in short periods, such as reviewing main
points of a reading or a lecture.

5. Structure the environment! Find a place, preferably one you can use
regularly and with limited distractions. Make sure you have all the essentials
so you have no excuses.
6. Establish a routine! We are creatures of habit. If you always study at a
certain time or day then it will be easier to get into concentration mode. Also,
it is better to study briefly and regularly
7. Use time management and scheduling tools.
Scheduling Tools and Tips:
1. Create a master schedule that indicates on a term or year basis when

holidays, exams, reports, essays etc. are due. Post it in a prominent spot!
2. Create a weekly schedule.
 At a regular time, e.g. Sunday evening, plan your week taking into
account your master schedule and your study goals for that week
 Mark out commitments such as classes, labs, work, sport, meals, etc.
 Make a list of your study tasks - be specific and prioritize.
 Schedule into available time slots these study tasks.
 Consider the purpose of the study task - if it’s working on an essay,
more time will be needed therefore schedule a block of time. If the
purpose is for review, say to scan a text then make use of the odd half
hours available.
 Schedule tasks that may require maximum concentration during your
“peak” or periods of maximum alertness – this varies from person to
person.
 Allot times for relaxation, exercise, etc. and be sure to include a “Cease
study” time that allows time to unwind before sleep (and it gives you
something to look forward to!).

 Monitor and Evaluate: review what has been accomplished at the end
of a day and decide if the schedule needs to be changed the next day.
3. Some students work better off a detailed daily To Do List. Again, at a regular
time (for example last thing at night or first thing in the morning) plan your
day taking into account your master schedule and the study goals for the
week.
4. When you have finished a study task, cross it off your timetable or list.
5. Avoid too much detail - a schedule has to remain flexible or it becomes a
dinosaur! Everyone has different needs; perhaps start with just organizing
study tasks for certain classes. Or only list your priorities.
Schedule in rewards, for example your favorite TV programme after doing a task you
were dreading.

VIII – INTERPERSONAL SKILLS
Introduction: To effectively communicate and interact with one another, human

beings need interpersonal skills. These skills are vital when interacting with other
people at an individual or group level. Developing your interpersonal skills enhances
your success both personally and professionally. Since employers understand the
importance of these skills in teamwork, they are constantly looking for employees
with proper interpersonal skills. With these skills, an employee will be in a position
to effectively communicate with his or her colleagues, clients and customers in the
workplace.
What Are Interpersonal Skills?
Interpersonal skill comprises of an array of aspects, including listening skills,

communication skills and attitude. In the business world, the term may mean the
ability of an employee to get along with his or her colleagues at the workplace.
Currently, proper interpersonal skills are vital in many job positions as well as
organizations.
1. Effective Communication
To convey your message effectively, you need good communication skills, including
spoken, written and nonverbal communication skills. To communicate effectively, you
need to listen thoughtfully and actively before giving your opinion. Good
communication skills are necessary in any profession; they help to combat conflicts
at the work place, facilitate productivity and allow one to convey accurate and
understandable message to colleagues and clients.
2. Positive Attitude

Positive attitude is another component of good interpersonal skills. Displaying a

positive attitude implies that you appreciate your work and the company. Portraying
a positive attitude includes doing such things as smiling while interacting and
communicating with your colleagues and customers, greeting people cheerfully at
the work place, expressing appreciation for other people’s efforts and undertaking
challenging with optimism.
3. Inclusiveness
Rather than doing things your own way, it is important to welcome the views of
others in the workplace. To demonstrate your team spirit, willingness to cooperate
and open-mindedness, you need to ask for the opinion and input of your colleagues
at the workplace. To foster inclusiveness in the company, you should also push for a
socially inclusive environment in the workplace.
4. Problem Solving
Conflicts are a common occurrence in the workplace. Rather than how fast you solve
the conflicts at the work place, you should focus on the best way to resolve conflicts.
To resolve a conflict, you first need to understand the cause. You should then evaluate
all the possible solutions to the conflict and set up objectives and strategies for
solving the issue. Finally, implement the plan and monitor its success.
5. Assertiveness
Assertiveness is another important component of good interpersonal skills.

Assertiveness entails defending what you believe in, standing up for your ideas and
confidently instructing others on what should be done. If not properly practiced,
assertiveness can be confused with aggressiveness. However, this is a very important
aspect, with regards to effective interpersonal skills. When used tactfully, this skill
can earn you respect from other people.
6. Manners

Having good manners can bring out other interpersonal skills in you. Different
communities across the world tend to judge people by their manners. With many
businesses going global, the need for proper manners at work is becoming more
important. Proper etiquette is essential in business-to-business interactions in both
small and big companies across the world.
7. Social Awareness
In a bid to succeed in your projects, you may find yourself ignoring other people’s
concerns. Being aware of the emotions of the other people at the place of work is an
important interpersonal skill. Additionally, this skill can make it easier for you to
identify opportunities. For example, a person undergoing professional challenges
tends to become desperate for aid. However, such person will not tell you that they
are desperate. Having social awareness skills will ensure that you identify such cases
with ease.
8. Self-Management
Self-management is a very valuable trait in the work environment. Many things will
offend you in your line of duty, but this skill will enable you to conceal anger and hide
frustration. Learning this skill is vital as it will enable you to control your emotions
and remain calm in adverse conditions for optimal production.
9. Accountability and Responsibility
In addition to portraying maturity, these two interpersonal skills ensure that you do
exactly what you said you would do. Therefore, these two traits will ensure that you
are a trusted and responsible person. Accountability can also be very helpful in
conflict resolution. For instance, admitting your mistakes and their consequences
means that you are accountable and will solve many conflicts you might have with
your colleagues.
10. Team Player

Being a team player is essential for a position which requires performing optimally in
a culturally diverse work environment. Additionally, it implies that you are able to
work in harmony with people from varied nationalities. This skill is particularly
important if you are looking for a leadership or a highly technical position in an
organization or company.
How to Develop Interpersonal Skills
1. Smile and Be Appreciative
Many people would love to associate with a happy person. To boost your
interpersonal skills, it is advisable to smile every once in a while. Additionally, be
cheerful about your work and life which also helps to appreciate your colleagues. You
may do this by identifying a positive attribute about them and positively commenting
on it. Thank your colleagues when they assist you with anything and let your
colleagues feel welcome when they seek assistance from you.
2. Listen Actively and Pay Attention To Others
When other people are talking to you, make them feel like you're interested through
active listening. For instance, you can demonstrate active listening by restating what
the person has said in your own words to show that you understand what they are
saying. Your colleagues will be happy to know that you are listening. Regarding
attention, acknowledge other peoples' achievements and sympathize with them
when they face difficulties like death or illness.
3. Resolving Conflicts
These two can go a long way in improving interpersonal skills. Always strive to create
a favorable environment for everyone in the place of work. This may be achieved by
treating all the people in an organization equally, following up with requests from
your colleagues and avoiding gossip. Resolving conflict also plays a major role in
bringing people together. When conflicts arise between your colleagues, solve them
in the fairest way. This will earn you admiration and respect.

4. Communicate Clearly and Use Humor
A clear communication will ensure that you avoid misunderstandings. Therefore,

mind what you say as well as how you say it. In addition to effectively passing the
message, communicating clearly implies that you are intelligent and mature,
regardless of your age. Additionally, use humor once in a while. People like someone
who makes them laugh. Using humor will help you develop good interpersonal skills
and gain people's affection.
5. Understand Others and Avoid Complaining
It is important to empathize with what others are going through at work. In doing
this, you need to employ your emotions and try to put yourself in your colleague’s
shoes. Additionally, avoid verbalizing your disappointments which will only serve to
fuel conflicts in the organization than bring people together.

IX – CREATIVITY
Introduction: A simple definition is that creativity is the ability to imagine or invent

something new. As we will see below, creativity is not the ability to create out of
nothing, but the ability to generate new ideas by combining, changing, or reapplying
existing ideas. Some creative ideas are astonishing and brilliant, while others are just
simple, good, practical ideas that no one seems to have thought of yet.
Creativity is an attitude: the ability to accept change and newness, a willingness to

play with ideas and possibilities, a flexibility of outlook, the habit of enjoying the
good, while looking for ways to improve it. We are socialized into accepting only a
small number of permitted or normal things, like chocolate-covered strawberries, for
example. The creative person realizes that there are other possibilities, like peanut
butter and banana sandwiches, or chocolate-covered prunes.
Creativity is A Process: Creative people work hard and continually to improve ideas
and solutions, by making gradual alterations and refinements to their works.
Contrary to the mythology surrounding creativity, very, very few works of creative
excellence are produced with a single stroke of brilliance or in a frenzy of rapid
activity. Much closer to the real truth are the stories of companies who had to take
the invention away from the inventor in order to market it because the inventor
would have kept on tweaking it and fiddling with it, always trying to make it a little
better. The creative person knows that there is always room for improvement.
Creative Methods
Several methods have been identified for producing creative results. Here are the five
proven methods:

1-Evolution: This is the method of incremental improvement. New ideas stem from
other ideas, new solutions from previous ones, the new ones slightly improved over
the old ones. Many of the very sophisticated things we enjoy today developed
through a long period of constant incrementation. Making something a little better
here, a little better there gradually makes it something a lot better--even entirely
different from the original.
2-Synthesis: With this method, two or more existing ideas are combined into a third,
new idea. Combining the ideas of a magazine and an audio tape gives the idea of a
magazine you can listen to, one useful for blind people or freeway commuters.
3-Revolution: Sometimes the best new idea is a completely different one, an marked
change from the previous ones. While an evolutionary improvement philosophy
might cause a professor to ask, "How can I make my lectures better and better?" a
revolutionary idea might be, "Why not stop lecturing and have the students teach
each other, working as teams or presenting reports?"
4-Reapplication: Look at something old in a new way. Go beyond labels. Unfixate,

remove prejudices, expectations and assumptions and discover how something can
be reapplied.
5-Changing Direction: Many creative breakthroughs occur when attention is shifted

from one angle of a problem to another. This is sometimes called creative insight.
Negative Attitudes That Block Creativity
1. Oh no, a problem: The reaction to a problem is often a bigger problem than the
problem itself. Many people avoid or deny problems until it's too late, largely because
these people have never learned the appropriate emotional, psychological, and
practical responses. A problem is an opportunity. The happiest people welcome

and even seek out problems, meeting them as challenges and opportunities to
improve things.
2. It can't be done: This attitude is, in effect, surrendering before the battle. By
assuming that something cannot be done or a problem cannot be solved, a person
gives the problem a power or strength it didn't have before. And giving up before
starting is self-fulfilling.
3. I can't do it: Or There's nothing I can do. Some people think, well maybe the
problem can be solved by some expert, but not by me because I'm not (a) smart
enough, (b) an engineer, or (c) a blank (whether educated, expert, etc.) Again, though,
look at the history of problem solving.
4. But I'm not creative: Everyone is creative to some extent. Most people are capable
of very high levels of creativity; just look at young children when they play and
imagine. The problem is that this creativity has been suppressed by education. All
you need to do is let it come back to the surface. You will soon discover that you are
surprisingly creative.
5. That's childish: In our effort to appear always mature and sophisticated, we often
ridicule the creative, playful attitudes that marked our younger years.
6. What will people think? There is strong social pressure to conform and to be
ordinary and not creative. So, what will people think? Well, they're already talking
about you, saying that your nose is too big or your shoes are funny or you date weird
people.
7. I might fail: Fear of failure is one of the major obstacles to creativity and problem
solving. The cure is to change your attitude about failure. Failures along the way

should be expected and accepted; they are simply learning tools that help focus the
way toward success.
Important Creative Thinking Skills
1. Suspending advocacy of your own idea to push for another person’s concept. It’s
helpful to be able to come into a creative situation and demonstrate your willingness to
champion another person’s idea. It can open the way to getting others to support your
thinking, as well.
2. Putting your own idea to the same test you apply to an idea from someone else. When
it comes to your own ideas, it’s easy to be a hypocrite and apply all kinds of hurdles to
other ideas while letting your own thinking slide by unchallenged in your own mind.
Just one thing to remember: don’t become somebody known for doing this!
3. Combining two different ideas and making them better as one idea. Often
compromising on creative ideas leads to something nobody likes, recognizes, or thinks
satisfies the original objective. Being able to dissect ideas to pull out highlights and put
them together as something new, however, is entirely different, and a great skill to have.
4. Letting someone else take “ownership” of your idea in order to build support for it.
This skill really tests whether you believe so strongly in an idea you’re willing to let
someone else step up and take it on as their own idea to see it prevail. The key to seeing
your idea win out can be letting somebody else be the vocal proponent for it.
5. Displaying the patience to wait for someone else to say what needs to be said so all
you have to do is agree. It’s tempting to jump in right away and make all the points you
feel necessary in a creative discussion before anyone else talks. At times though,

patience and silence are called for when it becomes clear someone can and will express
your perspective – and can do it more appropriately than you can.
6. Sticking to your guns amid challenges to a creative idea which makes solid strategic
sense. There are many creative ideas which, while being really cool, have nothing to do
with what you’re trying to achieve and how you should be achieving it. When
confronted with others who are passionately arguing for highly creative yet hardly
strategic concepts, make and remake your case if the idea you’re advocating is on the
mark strategically.
7. Always looking for new creative skills to develop in yourself and those around you.
Not only do you want to make yourself stronger creatively at every juncture, it’s in your
best interests to help improve the creative performance of your overall team. Creative
meetings are a great opportunity to spot gaps others labor under as well as seeing your
own creative shortcomings. Inventory what you saw after a creative meeting and get to
work filling the gaps.

X – PROBLEM SOLVING & DECISION MAKING SKILLS
Introduction: Problems involve setting out to achieve some objective or desired

state of affairs and can include avoiding a situation or event. If there were no barriers
in the way of achieving a goal, then there would be no problem. Problem solving
involves overcoming the barriers or obstacles that prevent the immediate
achievement of goals.
Making a Decision: This stage involves careful analysis of the different possible
courses of action and then selecting the best solution for implementation. This is
perhaps the most complex part of the problem solving process . Some solutions may
not be possible, due to other problems, like time constraints or budgets. It is

important at this stage to also consider what might happen if nothing was done to
solve the problem - sometimes trying to solve a problem that leads to many more
problems requires some very creative thinking and innovative ideas. Finally, make a
decision on which course of action to take - decision making is an important skill in
itself.
Process of Problem Solving & Decision Making:
Define the problem: This is often where people struggle. They react to what
they think the problem is. Instead, seek to understand more about why you
think there's a problem.
Prioritize the problems: If you discover that you are looking at several
related problems, then prioritize which ones you should address first. Note
the difference between "important" and "urgent" problems.

Understand your role in the problem: Your role in the problem can greatly
influence how you perceive the role of others. For example, if you're very
stressed out, it'll probably look like others are, too, or, you may resort too
quickly to blaming and reprimanding others. Or, you are feel very guilty about
your role in the problem, you may ignore the accountabilities of others.
Look at potential causes for the problem: It's amazing how much you don't
know about what you don't know. Therefore, in this phase, it's critical to get
input from other people who notice the problem and who are affected by it.
Identify alternatives for approaches to resolve the problem: At this point, it's
useful to keep others involved (unless you're facing a personal and/or
employee performance problem). Brainstorm for solutions to the problem.
Select an approach to resolve the problem
Plan the implementation of the best
Monitor implementation of the plan
Verify if the problem has been resolved or not: One of the best ways to verify if
a problem has been solved or not is to resume normal operations in the
organization. Still, you should consider:
1. What changes should be made to avoid this type of problem in the future?
Consider changes to policies and procedures, training, etc.
2. Lastly, consider "What did you learn from this problem solving?" Consider new
knowledge, understanding and/or skills.
3. Consider writing a brief memo that highlights the success of the problem solving
effort, and what you learned as a result. Share it with your supervisor, peers and
subordinates.
Rational Versus Organic Approach to Problem Solving

Rational
A person with this preference often prefers using a comprehensive and logical
approach similar to the guidelines in the above section. For example, the rational
approach, described below, is often used when addressing large, complex matters in
strategic planning.
1. Define the problem.

2. Examine all potential causes for the problem.
3. Identify all alternatives to resolve the problem.
4. Carefully select an alternative.
5. Develop an orderly implementation plan to implement that best alternative.
6. Carefully monitor implementation of the plan.
7. Verify if the problem has been resolved or not.
A major advantage of this approach is that it gives a strong sense of order in an

otherwise chaotic situation and provides a common frame of reference from which
people can communicate in the situation. A major disadvantage of this approach is
that it can take a long time to finish. Some people might argue, too, that the world is
much too chaotic for the rational approach to be useful.
Organic
Some people assert that the dynamics of organizations and people are not nearly so
mechanistic as to be improved by solving one problem after another. Often, the
quality of an organization or life comes from how one handles being “on the road”
itself, rather than the “arriving at the destination.” The quality comes from the
ongoing process of trying, rather than from having fixed a lot of problems. For many
people it is an approach to organizational consulting. The following quote is often
used when explaining the organic (or holistic) approach to problem solving.
A major advantage of the organic approach is that it is highly adaptable to

understanding and explaining the chaotic changes that occur in projects and

everyday life. It also suits the nature of people who shun linear and mechanistic
approaches to projects. The major disadvantage is that the approach often provides
no clear frame of reference around which people can communicate, feel comfortable
and measure progress toward solutions to problems.
Making a Decision: This stage involves careful analysis of the different possible
courses of action and then selecting the best solution for implementation. This is
perhaps the most complex part of the problem solving process. Following on from the
previous step it is now time to look at each potential solution and carefully analyze it.
Some solutions may not be possible, due to other problems, like time constraints or
budgets. It is important at this stage to also consider what might happen if nothing
was done to solve the problem - sometimes trying to solve a problem that leads to
many more problems requires some very creative thinking and innovative ideas.
Finally, make a decision on which course of action to take - decision making is an

important skill in itself and we recommend that you see our pages on decision
making.
Implementation:
This stage involves accepting and carrying out the chosen course of action.
Implementation means acting on the chosen solution. During implementation more

problems may arise especially if identification or structuring of the original problem
was not carried out fully.
Monitoring/Seeking Feedback:
The last stage is about reviewing the outcomes of problem solving over a period of
time, including seeking feedback as to the success of the outcomes of the chosen
solution. The final stage of problem solving is concerned with checking that the
process was successful. This can be achieved by monitoring and gaining feedback
from people affected by any changes that occurred. It is good practice to keep a
record of outcomes and any additional problems that occurred.

XI – ASSERTIVENESS
Introduction: Assertiveness is a way of thinking and behaving that allows a person

to stand up for his or her rights while respecting the rights of others. Nonassertive
people may be passive or aggressive. Passive individuals are not committed to their
own rights and are more likely to allow others to infringe on their rights than to
stand up and speak out. On the other hand, aggressive persons are very likely to
defend their own rights and work to achieve their own goals but are also likely to
disregard the rights of others. Additionally, aggressive individuals insist that their
feelings and needs take precedence over other people's. They also tend to blame
others for problems instead of offering solutions.
Where does Non-Assertive Behavior come from?

Many of us are taught that we should always please and/or defer to others, that it is
not nice to consider our own needs above those of others, or that we shouldn't "make
waves", that if someone says or does something that we don't like, we should just be
quiet and try to stay away from that person in the future.
Why is Assertiveness important?

If you don't know how to be assertive, you might experience:
 Depression -- Anger turned inward, a sense of being helpless, hopeless, or of

having no control over your life.
 Resentment -- Anger at others for manipulating or taking advantage of you.
 Frustration -- Why did I allow that to happen?
 Temper/violence -- If you can't express anger appropriately, it may build up.
Acquiring Assertive Skills:
Use assertive body language. Face the other person, stand or sit straight,
don'tuse dismissive gestures, be sure you have a pleasant, but serious facial
expression, keep your voice calm and soft, not whiney or abrasive.

 Use "I" statements. Keep the focus on the problem you're having, not on
accusing or blaming the other person. "I'd like to be able to tell my stories
without interruption." instead of "You're always interrupting my stories!"
 Use facts, not judgments. "Your punctuation needs work and your formatting
is inconsistent" instead of "This is sloppy work."
 Express ownership of your thoughts, feeling, and opinions. "I get angry when
he breaks his promises." instead of "He makes me angry." or "I believe the best
policy is to..." instead of "The only sensible thing is to ..."
 Make clear, direct, requests. Don't invite the person to say no. "Will you please
... ?" instead of "Would you mind ... ?" or "Why don't you ... ?"
 Broken record -- Keep repeating your point, using a low level, pleasant voice.
Don't get pulled into arguing or trying to explain yourself. This lets you ignore
manipulation, baiting, and irrelevant logic.
Nonverbal Assertiveness Even when we are silent we communicate a lot -- through

our eyes, facial expression, posture, gestures and personal appearance. Through
these nonverbal behaviors we communicate who we are and how we feel. Others
draw conclusions about our sincerity, credibility and emotional state based on our
nonverbal behavior. Poor eye contact, slouching, nervous gestures and other
nonassertive behaviors can convince others that what we have to say can be safely
ignored. Awareness of our nonverbal behaviors is an important advocacy tool.
Elements of Nonverbal Behavior Nonverbal behaviors are harder to control than

verbal behaviors, but with awareness and practice you can become effective in
communicating non-verbally as well as verbally.
1. Eye contact: Eye contact means looking directly at another, focusing on his or her
eyes. Direct eye contact is assertive. Children often play at seeing who can stare the
other down. The one who can maintain eye contact the longest wins and gains a
sense of power. We are not suggesting you try to out stare others, but looking directly
at another while you are speaking strongly suggests, even demands, that you

be listened to and taken seriously. Looking down while speaking to another suggests
timidity and weakens you in the eyes of others. Looking to the side as you speak
suggests avoidance and insincerity and jeopardizes your credibility.
2. Posture: The moment you walk into a room, your posture and carriage
communicate messages about your confidence, how you expect to relate to others,
your energy level and emotional state. Slouching may say "Don't notice me" or "I'm
tired and can be easily worn down" or "I'm not interested in being here". Slouching
does not invite the other to take you seriously. A tense and rigid posture
communicates you are in a heightened emotional state. It may be interpreted as
anxiety or anger depending on your other nonverbal behaviors. This kind of posture
makes you look out of control. An erect and relaxed posture while standing and
sitting communicates confidence, self-control, energy and an expectation that you be
taken seriously. When sitting, leaning forward slightly communicates interest and a
sense of purpose. Leaning back communicates disinterest or disagreement. Crossing
your arms and legs suggests a tense and closed attitude while uncrossed arms and
legs suggest a relaxed and open attitude.
3. Facial expression: We say a lot through our facial expressions. Our face tells
others the degree to which we are alert, interested, in agreement, or relaxed. It
reveals the types of emotions we feel. It is best to keep your facial expression as
neutral as possible.
Why assertive communication makes sense

Because assertiveness is based on mutual respect, it's an effective and diplomatic
communication style. Being assertive shows that you respect yourself because you're
willing to stand up for your interests and express your thoughts and feelings. It also
demonstrates that you're aware of the rights of others and are willing to work on
resolving conflicts.

Of course, it's not just what you say — your message — but also how you say it that's
important. Assertive communication is direct and respectful. Being assertive gives
you the best chance of successfully delivering your message. If you communicate in a
way that's too passive or too aggressive, your message may get lost because people
are too busy reacting to your delivery.
Assertive vs. passive behavior

If your style is passive, you may seem to be shy or overly easygoing. You may
routinely say things such as, "I'll just go with whatever the group decides." You tend
to avoid conflict. Why is that a problem? Because the message you're sending is that
your thoughts and feelings aren't as important as those of other people. In essence,
when you're too passive, you give others the license to disregard your wants and
needs. The internal conflict that can be created by passive behavior can lead to:
 Stress
 Resentment
 Seething anger
 Feelings of victimization
 Desire to exact revenge
Assertive vs. Aggressive Behavior

Now consider the flip side. If your style is aggressive, you may come across as a bully
who disregards the needs, feelings and opinions of others. You may appear self-
righteous or superior. Very aggressive people humiliate and intimidate others and
may even be physically threatening. You may think that being aggressive gets you
what you want. However, it comes at a cost. Aggression undercuts trust and mutual
respect. Others may come to resent you, leading them to avoid or oppose you.

XII – LEADERSHIP SKILLS & TEAM SPIRIT
Introduction: A leader is one who Creates an inspiring vision of the future;

Motivates and inspires people to engage with that vision; Manages delivery of the
vision; Coaches and builds a team, so that it is more effective at achieving the vision.
Success relies on good leadership. Leadership skills help you to make more effective
decisions, focus on your personal vision and progress towards achieving goals of
your business.
 There is no single characteristic or quality that defines a good leader.

Motivating people towards a common business goal involves a mix of styles
and strategies that often take years to develop.
 Leaders can also come from any area of the business. As a business owner you
will need strong leadership qualities, but leadership can also come from team
leaders and employees.
Skills of a Successful Leader

As a leader, you are likely to need some key skills. You may not have all of these skills
right now, but if you are aware of your own strengths and weaknesses you can take
steps to develop the skills you don't have.
Motivation: A successful leader sets a good example. Act as a role model for your
team, and don't be afraid to pitch in and help out when needed. Your team will
respond well to your leadership if you are willing to contribute. If you show respect
to your employees, thanking them for their work and complimenting them on their
successes, they will be far more likely to respect you in return.
Communication

 Active listening: You can establish excellent working relationships just by

listening to staff and clients. An active listener focuses on what the speaker is
saying, regularly paraphrasing to check that they've received the speaker's
intended message.
 Body language awareness: Be sure that your words match your body language.
People read a lot into gestures and eye contact, and they will be far more
responsive if what you say matches your posture, expressions and other
movements.
 Learning: The ability to learn new skills is crucial for any leader. If you go into
business believing you have nothing more to learn, you will restrict your
ability to grow and adapt to change. Always be on the lookout for ways to
improve your skills, through knowledge and observation. Seek more formal
training where necessary.
Analytical skills: Decision makers need to understand and analyze information

presented to them before making any key decisions. If a problem arises, you need to
be able to analyze business processes to find out what is going wrong, then try to
figure out how to fix it. Your recommendations to management could have an effect
on the future prospects of the business. Remember that changing a process or fixing
a problem could affect another area of the business, now or further down the line.
Adaptability: You must be ready to adapt to changing circumstances. A successful

leader needs to continually anticipate, evaluate and remain open-minded and
flexible. Encourage innovative ideas, and take advantage of changing technology, such
as social media.
Organizational skills: Be consistent and systematic in how you go about organizing

projects by:
 setting expectations
 delegating tasks

 fixing deadlines
 evaluating alternatives.
5 Essential Leadership Skills for Team Spirit
All team leaders should constantly develop 5 essential skills to build convergence
within their teams:
1) Promote clear values: to be effective, team leaders and team members need to
share the same business values and understanding concerning what it takes to be
effective as a team
2) Define clear objectives: team leaders must be able to show the big picture and
connect individual and collective objectives to overall team strategy
3) Define clear activities: all team members must understand their own role and area
of responsibility and that of their colleagues. Team members should share objectives
to encourage team work and better understanding of need for team work. The results
of the whole is always greater than the sum of the parts.
4) Lead by example: teams need to meet challenging objectives and may often meet
obstacles within the organization. Leaders have a key role in developing a positive
surge capable of overcoming obstacles and inertia and must lead by example to
demonstrate that effective results are achievable. Setting an example is always key.
This also means taking overall responsibility when things go wrong and defending
team members whenever necessary.
5) Improve continuously: leaders must constantly seek to improve individual and

team performance by:
– constantly giving feedback to team members

– focusing on what’s right and not who is right

– developing a team spirit focusing on winning rather than on not losing

– promoting a search for excellence
– set high personal standards and do all that is possible to live up to these standards
– remaining humble
A Team Building skills list for Effective Teamwork.

Good communication skills: Without communications, there is not a team at
all. Good communication skills are absolutely crucial for every good team and
effective teamwork. Examples of good communication skills are verbal and
non-verbal communication skills, to be patient and confident.
Active listening and care for others: Listening skills have the top position in
the team building skills list. To build a team you have to understand other team
members needs, beliefs, worries, hopes. This can be achieved only by active
listening including care and attention to other members.
Collaborative skills: To make collaboration with many people is one of the
most difficult task, but also one of the most important prerequisites to achieve
successful team work. That is why collaborative skills are key team building
skills on our list. Effective team means a great collaborative team.
Building confidence: This is absolutely critical ability among the team
building and team leader skills. Confidence keeps a team together. It promotes
support and reliability.
Creativity, creative thinking and idea exchange: Creativity is a
characteristic of every good and effective team. Creative thinking is the most
important factor for future success.
Patience: To be patient is crucial quality too. Patience is about being tolerable
and understanding. If you want to build a friendship with others you have to be
patient.
Supportive: There is no team without support. Team members have to support
each other and have to rely on each other. These are the main building

elements of a team. So being supportive have also a key place in the team
building skills list.
Problem-solving skills: In every team there are problems. No matter whether
you are a team manager or an employee, you have to learn to deal with
conflicts in the most effective way.
Other essential abilities in the team building list for effective teamwork are:
Respectful
Positive Attitude
Relationship Building
Responsibility
Understanding Feelings
Honesty
Influencing

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Life Skills – Diploma V-SEM – English Lab Manual LAQSHYA

Importance of life skills:

Benefits for the individual

 Find new ways of thinking and problem solving

Benefits for employment

Benefits for society

 Recognizing cultural awareness and citizenship makes international

Developing Life Skills:

Assess Current Strengths

Assessing strengths, or creating a personal inventory, involves making a list of all

Outline Basic Beliefs and Values

Explore Current Barriers to Personal Growth

In addition to assessing strengths and outlining beliefs, current barriers to personal

mental challenges, addiction, lack of education and language or cultural differences.

Respect Learning and Application Differences

Focus on the Area of Control

Keep It Simple and Be Flexible

II: ENHANSING SELF-ESTEEM

How do you regard yourself? Ask yourself the following questions.

What causes low self-esteem?

 Multiple stressors: Stressful life events knock us temporarily and usually we

How can we improve your self-esteem?

Techniques to improve self-esteem

 Use positive affirmations: Having participated in using your thoughts diary

 Focus on the positive: Often we make ourselves unhappy because we focus

Distorted Thought patterns:

1. All or nothing thinking:

4. Discounting the positives:

Positive Affirmations: Choose some of the following affirmations or create your

 I am a truly unique individual

III: GOAL SETTING

Goals are set on a number of different levels:

Starting to Set Personal Goals

Your Lifetime Goals

 Artistic: Do you want to achieve any artistic goals? If so, what?

How to Start to Achieve Your Lifetime Goals

Why Positive Attitude:

Positive attitude manifests in the following ways:

 Motivation and energy to do things and accomplish goals.

 Making you feel inspired.

 It makes you look at failure and problems as blessings in disguise.

 Believing in yourself and in your abilities.

 Enables you to show self-esteem and confidence.

 You look for solutions, instead of dwelling on problems.

 You see and recognize opportunities.

1. Keep a gratitude journal.

2. Reframe your challenges.

3. Get good at being rejected.

4. Use positive words to describe your life.

5. Replace have with get.

6. Don’t let yourself get dragged into other people’s complaints.

8. Notice the righteous in times of tragedy.

9. Have solutions when pointing out problems.

10. Make someone else smile.

Emotions often lead to coping activities. When we feel something, we consequently

Emotion management strategies

for at least 30 seconds.

2. Smile to make others feel good. Create that connection, open

communication, trigger those mirror brain cells that make us experience

empathy for others.

hormones under our armpits – often referred to as ‘happy hormones’. Again,

emotions affect you.

feel tingly. Do it for at least 60 seconds.