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Nathan Elerts

Trotter

Brit Lit 3

8 January 2019

Helping Everyone but Myself

Throughout my life I have experienced problems with situations ranging from sports to

school and the occasional mix of the two. Most, if not all, of these problems emerge from the

same recurring problem. I am a helper. This means I will always feel the need to help others,

even if it means I have to give up time and effort to help myself.

From my time as a soccer player I noticed how my need to help others became a blessing

and a curse. Many other people who fall under the “helper” type have been found to “devote an

enormous amount of energy to them,” and I had quickly found that similarity within my style of

play. I would often find myself giving advice to people who were showing negative emotion

towards a mistake they had just made, or I would try to help organize the team as much as

possible to take some weight off of my coach’s shoulders. I would do this to a point where it was

taking a toll on the amount of energy I was putting into my own game.

Being a helper has also taken a toll on the way I approach school. Most people who fall

under the category of being a helper “begin to feel that gratitude is owed to them.” During group
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projects, no matter what the subject or who the people in my group are, I feel as if I should focus

my time and effort on my group members rather than my own work. This has lead to my portions

of projects to be the weaker one. Not only that, but I feel as if my weak projects should be

overlooked due to the effort I put in everyone else.

When I played soccer for Poly I found my helping personality to present itself as a curse

once again. Whenever we would be sent to study hall, I would always make sure that I could

help anyone as much as I can. Eventually, this would lead me to lack the energy needed to get

my own work done. I found myself with subpar grades, however, I wasn’t upset due to my

previous efforts to help because “Helping others makes [helpers] feel good about themselves.”

In order to make myself a better person and an overall better helper I must start

thinking for myself more. Before devoting my energy towards someone or something, I should

confirm that I have done enough for myself. Doing this will lead me to become the healthiest

version of myself.