The Monthly Moose

The English language magazine by ISU

In This Issue:
ISU Newsp.4-7

Illegally Norwegian12-13

Nordic Cinema20-22
And More...

Vol.3 Issue 2 — October 2010


Dear Readers,
The autumn is upon us, ladies and
gentlemen. Gone are the days when you
could roll in the grass in front of Monolitten
prior to hopping from cliffs into the
turquoise waters of the Oslo fjord. It is time
to take a waterproof jacket out of the closet
and face the music. It is time to stay in and
drink mulled wine with a circle of friends;
it is time to get drenched on the way to
getting drunk.
Autumn paints the leaves red and yellow
and bleaches rabbits’ fur. Our magazine
has also changed color, which is to say
it has acquired more color, thanks to the
benevolence of the Student Parliament.
However, we have more tricks up our sleeve
and more plans for making our publication
even more varied and interactive. You
will shortly be able to find The Moose on
its’ own unique stands at Sogn, Kringsjå
and Frederikke. We are happy for all the
positive feedback and interest expressed in
our magazine, and we hope that this issue
will brighten up the foggy dullness of the
Norwegian autumn. The Norwegians say:
“There is no bad weather, only bad clothing”.
We say there is no better substitute for bad
clothes than staying at home on a rainy day
and tapping into the inexhaustible resource
of useless but entertaining knowledge our
magazine provides.
You are holding the second edition in your
hands. This is for real.
You are exploring the ways of the Moose of
Norway.
Marija, the Moose Herder
The Monthly Moose — Villa Eika, Blindern 0314 Oslo, P.O. Box 1088. monthly.moose@gmail.com
2 \\ Editorial
Chief Editor: Marija Cabuskina — Writers: Anita Iyer, Blayne Sapelli, Bunny, JeeHee Hwang, Julie
Iyer — Proof Readers: Anita Iyer, Mitch Molstad — Photo Editor: Sara Fegelman — Visual
Radan Furiel, Sara Fegelman, Summer Choi — Cover Design: Irine Osepashvili, Summer Choi —
EDITORIAL
A Moose Apology
Writing and editing for an English language student
magazine here at UiO can be a surprisingly educational
experience. All of us involved with The Moose are
volunteers, and we editors rely on the creativity,
resourcefulness, and enthusiasm of our contributers
to keep The Moose interesting, entertaining, and
somewhat relevant. Our publication policy is simple:
come to us with an idea, a story, an article, a photograph,
or an illustration, and as long as it does not violate
Norwegian law, we’ll probably be open to publishing
it. As a general rule, the Moose Editorial Board values
freedom of expression, and we are pleased that The
Moose can offer content which covers a broad range of
styles and opinions – even when the aforementioned
styles and opinions differ wildly from our own.
However, sometimes, freedom of expression results
in the unexpected. Many of our contributers are
international students, and as a result, much of our
content tends to revolve around the day to day lives of
the international student community. When accepting
articles for publication, we do our best to ensure
that those identified within our pages—by name,
description, photograph, or otherwise—have been
represented fairly, and that those who wish to remain
anonymous have been allowed to do so. However, we
make mistakes. Last month, an article was published
which, unknown to us, clearly identified a certain
student and highlighted some less-than-pleasant
moments of his or her time here in Oslo. This student felt
upset that his or her anonymity had been stripped from
them, and we are deeply sorry for this. We appreciate
this student for coming forward and reminding us that
with freedom of expression comes the responsibility
to understand the ethical limits of said freedom. We
cannot force anyone else to apologize, but as those
who are nominally in charge of written content, we
hope that our sincere apologies go some of the way
toward mitigating the harm caused.
Regards,
Marija Cabuskina, Chief Editor
Anita Iyer, Copy Editor
 CONTENTS
4 ISU Board: Remaining Members
6
5 The SiO Struggle
6 Beach Party
7 ISU News
8 The Welfare Den
10 What’s On at UiO
11 Universitas News
12 Famous Norwegians
14 Top 5: Hidden Oslo
16 On the Way to Munch Summer House
12
18 Oktoberfest
20 Nordic Films
23 Bread And Games
24 Why Norway?
25 UDI Disaster
28 The Moose of Norway
29 Learn Norwegian with the Moose
30 Moose Comic Strip 14
Contents // 3

Rousseau, Marija Cabuskina, Nadya Alyeshkira, Ole Hansson, Radan Furiel — Copy Editor: Anita
Content: John Modin, Irine Osepashvili, Lubica Rozborova, Marija Cabuskina, Miranti Wirastuti,
Layout: John Modin, Julie Rousseau, Marija Cabuskina.
 Meet the new ISU board! cotinued from Vol. 1

ISU (International Student Union)

Oslo is a branch of ISU Norway,
a non-profit organization run for
and by international students.
ISU collaborates with the Student
TRIP ADVISOR Parliament of UiO to represent
Full name: Schuyler Lystad international students.
From: USA
Why are you going to make the best damn
trip advisor ever?
'Cause I already am the best damned SPORTS MINIS-
trip advisor ever. I have spent a home- TER
less night in the middle of Norway, Full name: Mu-
gone dogsledding in Tromsø, to the top of Bergen, and hammed Attab
I know a bit about making the most of a trip. Seeing Javed,
isn't as important as being and experiencing. From:Pakistan
I have this weird football shaped rash on my elbow. Why are you go-
What should I do about it? ing to make the
Well, I'm no doctor, but what you do is get a few coco- best damn Sports Minister ever?
nuts and crack them open and make a small bath of Because I love sports! I was a part
the fluids, I find a bowl and three coconuts works pret- of both the badminton and cricket
ty well. You submerge the rash for about three hours teams at my home university
while dining on the interior of the coconuts, find the What kind of experience do you
nearest beach party, and don a hula skirt, but keep on have?
your shirt and your cool, and hula dance up next to the I was the organizer of sports at my
prettiest girl in the place and whisper in her ear and ask department back home.
her if she's ever felt waves lapping on the equator. Hypothetically, if some kind of
terrible scandal were to destroy
Unless you want to get rid of it. Then topical cream. your administration, what would
it be?
No comment.

WEBMASTER Join our Facebook

4 \\ ISU Board Members

The Continuing Saga of the Non-Existent group

Webmaster
Why are you going to make the best The International Students’
damned Webmaster ever? Union at the University of Oslo
Why aren’t you responding? Is it because 2010/2011
you do not, in fact, exist, and anyone with
any webmastering skills could totally fill
this vital, super fun, and generally awesome role? Should
you contact the ISU at isu.oslo@gmail.com ? Text:Blayne Sapelli
Photos: John Modin
 On September
20th, we
witnessed a SiO
truck loaded
with furniture
heading for
the recycling
facility near
building 24 in
Kringsjå.

They were throwing away chairs and

tables, despite countless complaints
that we need at least SOME furniture
in the by now empty “study rooms” -
the availability of which is allegedly
an important part of the rent. We
managed to get some seven chairs out
of the trash and placed them in our
building. It remains a mystery why
on earth would SiO get rid of quite
usable furniture, when the demand is
still high.
Otherwise, nothing has changed. The Monthly Moose is
very interested in
the housing situation
at Kringsjå, and
of the housing
arrangements of
The SiO Struggle // 5

students in general.
Please contact us at
monthly.moose@gmail.
com if you’d like to
share your pictures,
experiences, or
thoughts on the
situation.

Radan Furiel, General

Secretary, ISU-UiO
 ISU I
News S
   U
Chocolate Factory Trip
You’ve all seen and tasted Freia chocolates,

B
so let the ISU take you on a tour of the Freia
chocolate factory where you can see how it is
made, and even get a sample of some of the

e
product. The tour is on November 12 and costs
60 kr per person. The ISU will have further
details on their Facebook page, including

a
when and where you can sign up. Stay tuned!

 Sleeping Bags
Did you know that you can borrow a sleeping
bag from the ISU? We have four high
c
quality sleeping bags that we give out to
our members. All you need to do is sign an
agreement and pay a deposit. Contact the ISU
h
via e-mail if interested.

Amended Constitution

P
The constitution of the ISU has been amended
recently. Among other changes, we’ve
introduced less rigid rules for becoming a

a
member. Every international student is a
member of ISU by default, and from now
on every Norwegian student can become

r
a member by application. That means that
Norwegian students can now contribute
to The Monthly Moose, participate in the

t
elections of ISU board and be elected as board
members for ISU. Integration rules!

y
 

Questions? Comments?
6 \\ ISU News

Contact ISU at isu.oslo@gmail.com

Text:Marija Cabuskina and Schuyler Lystad

Pictures: Lubica Rozborova
 Gobble-di-gook
Gossip

Paris Hilton called. She wants her dog

back. I’m a gossip columnist, not a
friggin lost and found! What does a
whole reckless clan of international
students in Norway want with this
poor, defenseless heiress’s dog,
anyway? Since no one individual has
come forward as the culprit, Ms. Hilton
presumes to assume that you’re all
accomplices. She didn’t make any
direct statements during our three-
hour conference call with Pamela
and David, who were on the set of
The ISU beach party was a success. Not all of the sun-deprived, their new made-for-TV remake called
Mojito-thirsty students could be hosted by the premises of Am- “Bygones in Bikinis: Baywatch Over-
atøren. However, those that could get in were immersed into an the-Hill”. Still, Paris mentioned again
and again how rich and important
oasis of sunshine, thanks to the efforts of DJ Zaq and the inflat-
her daddy is and how he gave her
able palm tree. ISU felt their mission was accomplished, when, a stockpile of long-range nuclear
by the end of the party, new couples cropped up out of thin weapons for her 13th sweet 16.
air and people refused to submit to the commands of Am- Seriously. Just give her dog back.
atøren personnel and leave.
Between hobnobbing with the
super famous and obscenely rich,
even I, Bunny, found some time to
get shit-faced with the little people.
So how about that beach party?!
Word on the street is there were
some pretty lascivious goings-on.
Lady Gaga made an appearance at
our beach party without makeup,
so basically incognito. She gave a
short concert, consisting of two
notes blurted out from a rusty kazoo,
and then fell quivering at the feet of
some elegant and exquisitely dressed
Lithuanians. The girls dragged Gaga
to her feet and helped her back into
her limo (Oh, you didn’t see it? It was
parked right behind Rema, next to the
post boxes), just out of reach of the
clutching lecherous claws of a bacteria-
ridden German beast. Luckily, once his
all-time favorite musical genius and
fantasy ladylove was out of sight, the
German went back to normal and was
cool again.

Bunny
ISU News // 7
 Velferden! An Evening
at Kringsja’s Student
Pub

I went to interview Rebekka

Skaar, Velferden’s PR person, Rebekka: When I first came here, they didn’t
and a lovely person with a have anyone doing any of that, so I started it
up.
really badass pirate name.
Blayne: You came up with the position?
Blayne: Where am I? What’s the name of this
place? Rebekka: Yeah, we talked about it, and I
came up with ideas about how to spread the
Rebekka: Velferden, it’s like ‘welfare’ - student word. Its been fun.
welfare. Most people call it the Kringsja
student pub, but we’re trying to get the name
“Velferden” out there, like a brand name.

Blayne: I like it. It has a ring to it: “The

Welfare Den.” So you were working the bar
when I arrived, what’s that like?

Rebekka: Well this is my first day, today,

actually. I spilled some beer and stuff, but it’s
fun! Everyone behind the bar is a volunteer,
so everyone can try it out.

Blayne: Really!? (‘Why am I talking to you?’ I

thought to myself) How long into your first day
is it right now?

Rebekka: This is my first hour, actually.

Blayne: So I guess you’re not the pre-eminent

8 \\ The Wellfare Den

source of history about the Welfare Den

then?

Rebekka: Actually I’ve been working here

since May, but mostly PR work.

Blayne: That explains a lot. Haha, how

did you come in to that?
 Blayne: I assume you have, like, meetings, where you get together and make plans. So, if
you have a really cool idea about what the Welfare Den can do, and everyone agrees, you
can actually make it a reality?

Rebekka: Yeah! Def- in reasonable measures, of course.

Blayne: Damnit, because I had this great idea about hosting a building burn down contest
Rebekka: That would not happen. Although we did have this one guy who wanted to put
on a fire breathing show out front to draw people in. He was very keen on that idea. I’m not
sure what happened to that. But yes, we have a meeting every Monday - you have to be a
member, though - where all of the volunteers come together, and we talk about what we want
to do, and we drink some beers!

Blayne: Monday!? You guys start early. Is joining

Velferden a good way to meet real, live, Norwegians?
Are there a lot of international students here?

Rebekka: Yeah of course! To both. Every Wednesday,

you can come see Marius, the bar manager, dance in a
purple, shiny hat. Never fails, every Wednesday.

Blayne: I take it you’ve good events going on...

Rebekka: Yeah, every Wednesday is the pub quiz-

it’s in English. And it’s a lot of fun. Bring your friends,
it’s our busiest night! And, people can sign up to hold
quizzes themselves. They’re all 100% student run, so
come on down!
The Welfare Den // 9

Blayne: What is one reason you shouldn’t come here?

Rebekka: You might have too much fun!

The venue is also available for renting out! People have

parties, birthdays, all kinds of events here! Just contact
Marius (The aforementioned man with the shiny purple
hat) and/or check out their facebook: just search “VBF
Social Club” Text: Blayne Sapelli
Photo: Miranti Wirastuti
 What’s on at UiO?
Lunsj med kultur  
Friday, November 5
Lunch and Culture Roger Bekkevoll band
Free classical music concerts in Georg Sverdrups Roger Bekkevoll - singer, lapsteel,guitar,
library every Friday at 12:15 harmonica; Roar Skjelbred, base; Svein Tore
Coffee and waffles served at reasonable prices Anderson, banjo, gitar
  Soulrock with jazz influences and a singer-
Friday, October 15 songwriter sounding.
Oslo Philharmony  
Program will be announced on the day of Friday, October 12
performance Kammerorkester of the Music Institute
(conductor Rune Bergmann)
Friday, October 22 Cosy orchestra music by Debussi and Puccini
Cello with dried plums  
This time culture lunch will be served at
Frokostkjelleren close to the main university Galleri Sverdrup
building in the center.  
Vivian Sunnarvik plays cello, Torhild Fimrete Exhibition Ny Kunnskap på Tvers (New
plays electronic piano. Music by Granados and Interdisciplinary Knowledge)
Dvorak. Celebrating the 7 interdisciplinary research fields
  that were made available at the University of
Friday, Ocotber 29 Oslo in order to obtain new knowledge beyound
Opera trio “De Tre Damene” borders. The gallery is situated next to the
Kjerstin Løvdal (soprano), Ragnhild Kristina canteen at the Georg Sverdrups library.
Motzfeldt (soprano), Kari Lise Høgseth
(mezzosoprano), Helge Evju (piano) You want to advertise for a non-profit event,
The ladies will perform music by Mozart, Delibes that’s accessible for international students?
and Massenet. Let us know at monthly.moose@gmail.com
10 \\ What's On at UiO
 Thus Spoke
Universitas is Norway’s biggest student newspaper,
and has 35 issues per year , with 17,000 copies
printed of each issue. It is sponsored by SiO and is
therefore free of charge for students. Here’s a short
summary of some of the headlines hitting Universitas
over the past few weeks.
OCTOBER 6TH, 2010
NEXT YEAR’S BUDGET ANNOUNCED
Contrary to the expectations of many Norwegian
students, the amount and duration of the student loan
has not been augmented. However, the government
has invested in 1000 new housing units and is going
to grant 2200 more students admission to public
universities. Norwegian students disapprove of the
reduction of research funds and a possible change
to the payment scheme for student loans. Currently,
students receive a larger sum at the beginning of
each semester, but this may change.
FACULTY OF DENTISTRY UNSAFE?
Last year the faculty’s staff was accused of sexual
harassment, insulting behaviour and breach of privacy
protection. No one wants to take responsibility.
LAZY STUDENTS’ FAULT
In the recently published report by The National
Agency For Quality Assurance (NOKUT) 70% of
university employees express the opinion that
laziness among students is the biggest obstacle for
achieving a better quality of education.
SEPTEMBER 29TH, 2010
CAKE FOR THE SAHARA
To celebrate the fact that the oil-company Fugro has
stopped the allegedly illegal oil extraction in West-
Sahara, SAIH ( Norwegian Students’ and Academics’
International Assistance Fund) offered the company
a cake during the Career Days at UiO.
A STUDENT HOUSE FOR STUDENTS
The school of economics, BI ,has recently subjected
its’ Student house (the location used by student
societies, not student housing) to private owners.
Other student houses in Norway, including Chateau
Neuf, are critical: students must be owners of their
culture.
SEPTEMBER 22TH 2010
DRASTIC ANTI-PROCRASTINATION MEASURES
PROPOSED FOR MA STUDENTS
The percent of MA students graduating on time has
been significantly low at UiO. This is why the university
wants to discard master students that fail to attain 30
points per semester. Students are outraged.
CASTRATED IN FRONT OF THE KING
To celebrate the 75 year anniversary of the Veterinary
School of Norway, His Majesty Harald V, King of
Norway was invited to witness the castration of a
horse. “That’s life,” said the King.
SEPTEMBER 15TH, 2010
INTERNATIONAL STUDENTS MUST PAY
Høyre (The Conservative Party of Norway) wants
to introduce tuition fees for international students.
Norwegian students are critical of this proposal, since
they regard it as an attempt to abolish free education
in Norway.
This article about Universitas is a stub. You can help The
Monthly Moose by expanding it.
Universitas News // 11
If you can read Norwegian and write in English, send us
a message at monthly.moose@gmail.com!
compiled by
Marija Cabuskina
 Famous
Norwegians
Illegally Norwegian
Speaking Out From The Shadowlands Of The
Illegal Immigrant
Sometimes, the most famous Norwegians are not
technically Norwegian. Maria Amelie, the 25 year
old author of one of Norway’s fastest-selling books,
leads a paradoxical life.
On the surface, her life is disarmingly normal,
albeit on the slightly bohemian side. After living
in Norway for over seven years, her Norwegian is
flawless, and her wardrobe is a colorful mishmash
of secondhand finds favored by hipsters worldwide.
Since completing her Masters degree, she has spent
time working odd jobs on the black market while
secretly working on a book about her life.
12 \\ Famous Norwegians
However, underneath the veneer of normalcy,
she lives a life which she describes as “vacillating
between a fairy tale and brutal reality.” The reason? someone’s!
Maria Amelie is one of an estimated 32,000 illegal
immigrants living in Norway. However, unlike the
31,999 other individuals in her situation (give or Norway ’s Greatest Modern Spy :
take a few) she has gone public with the story of her Convicted, Pardoned, And Back In The
life. Her book, Ulovlig Norsk [Illegally Norwegian], Headlines
published about a month ago, has been flying off
the shelves and garnering media attention since.
Maria Amelie’s decision to come forward
with her story casts light onto the shadowy
world which thousands of illegal immigrants
in Norway inhabit. Since her family lives here
illegally, she has not shared much about her
life before coming to Norway. However, she
has stressed that her parents were law abiding
citizens, and that it was fear which drove them
from their home somewhere in the Caucasus
to Norway, and fear which motivated them to
stay in Norway after UDI denied them asylum.
Without a valid visa, Maria Amelie cannot
get a personal number, effectively making it
impossible for her to open a bank account,
apply for a tax card, or access the Norwegian
health care system, despite having completed
an advanced degree and for all intents and
purposes, becoming Norwegian. In the wake
of her literary success, her attorney has filed a
new application for residence on her behalf.
Those Moose readers interested in learning
more and who are prepared to tackle a book
in Norwegian are encouraged to check out
her story for themselves. Those who aren’t are
unfortunately out of luck for the moment –
however, if you have a personal number and
a valid visa, you can take solace in the fact
that your UDI experience was better than
Maria Amelie may be one of the moment’s
cultural phenomena, but before she was
Have you ever been standing in the check-out line at
Kiwi or Rema, idly scanning the newspaper headlines
or glossy pictures in the tabloids and wondered who
all those people are? If so, you’re not alone! Join the
Moose as we continue to examine some of those
names and faces appearing in Norwegian media,
and learn more about just what it takes to make the
headlines in Norway.

born there was Arne Treholt. Like espionage drama

An Arbeiderpartiet [Labor] worldwide, this case has
politician and diplomat, captured the imagination of
Treholt holds the distinction the Norwegian public. Treholt,
of being Norway’s best known now a multimillionaire
spy. After several years of businessman who has
surveillance, he was arrested authored several books about
in 1984 and later convicted of his life, is pleased the case
high treason and espionage, has finally been reopened.
resulting in a 20 year prison As quite a few prominent
sentence. Norwegians were involved in
the original trial over 25 years
However, he was pardoned ago, the case seems destined
in 1992 by an Arbeiderpartiet to dominate headlines into
government (an event which the next decade.
caused an uproar in and of
itself ) and has been living Those Moose readers
overseas ever since. interested in knowing more
should put their Google skills
Treholt, who has admitted to work and peruse one of
that he accepted money the many English language articles about the case.
from the KGB and the Iraqis in exchange for Those seeking a different approach to the subject
information, has maintained he was not guilty can always check out the recent Norwegian film,
of the charges against him, and argued that Kommandør Treholt & Ninjatroppen [International
the documents he sold did not contain state English title: Norwegian Ninja] which purportedly
secrets. In an attempt to set the historical explains how Arne Treholt and his elite ninja force
record straight, he has thrice applied for his saved Norway during the Cold War.
case to be reopened, a request which was
denied three times previously.
Famous Norwegians // 13

However, following the recent publication of Sources:

a book called Forfalskningen – Politiets Løgn
i Treholt-saken [The Fraud – The Police’s Lie in www.aftenposten.no
the Treholt Case], which alleges that the police www.dagbladet.no
utilized illegal surveillance and fabricated
evidence, interest in the case was revived. www.nrk.no
Now, several police officers from the time have
stepped forward and corroborated some of www.vg.no
the events from the book, which has caused
Text: Anita Iyer
the case to be reopened.
Pictures: Irina Osepashvili
 NORWAY TOP 5
Oslo’s most carefully hidden pearls Text by Marija Cabuskina
Photos by Summer Choi and Marija Cabuskina

Everybody lies. EMANUEL VIGELAND’S

But tourist brochures lie in their especially filthy
and inhumane way by encouraging you to go
to places you have already heard about, places
swarming with tourists and other insects, places
where you have to stand for hours on end in a
queue to get a picture which will most probably
look exactly like a googled image, but with a
slightly tilted horizon.
So if you are tired of Munch, Viking ships and
Holmenkollen, here is a list of undeservingly
neglected tourist attractions which are much
less aggressively advertised.
THE MINI BOTTLE
1
GALLERY
Directions: Kirkegata 10 (centre of Oslo, East
of Town Hall) // Opening hours: Saturdays and
Sundays from 12 to 16 // Entrance fee: 85 NOK
Created by the successor of the founders of
the Ringnes beer brewery, the millionaire and
property mogul Christian Ringnes, the gallery
is the world’s largest collection of small bottles.
The museum claims to exhibit more than 12,000
bottles on its three floors, arranged in bizarre
installations. The other 40,000 bottles are strictly
monitored in the bottle vault. Ringnes’ first item
was given to him when he was seven and as yet
unaware of the magical effects of substances sold
in those bottles. Over time, the number of bottle
he had expanded, until (the rumour goes) his
wife put her foot down. However, being a person
of considerable wealth, Ringnes could afford
to move all his collectibles from his apartment
to premises in the city centre and thus avoid a
divorce. One can also wonder whether the design
of the museum was inspired by consuming the
14 \\ TOP 5
2 MAUSOLEUM
Directions: Grimelundsveien 8, take T-bane
nr. 1 Frognerseteren to Slemdal stasjon (now
substituted by a bus) or buss 46 to Grimelundsveien
// Opening hours: Sundays 12 to 16 // Entrance
fee: 40 NOK
If you have already wandered in Gustav Vigeland’s
park while wondering about the deep meaning
of all the piled up naked bodies, it is time to move
to the next step: the tomb (or the mausoleum)
of his brother, Emanuel. If you imagine that this
place is something like Lenin’s last resort in Red
Square then you are wrong. Emanuel Vigeland
built a vast arched building to store his ashes
surrounded by an 800 m2 large fresco entitled Vita.
Sandwiched between regular residential houses,
the tomb hosts what probably is best described
as a Norwegian Kama Sutra, depicting humans’
journey from conception to death and all the
more intimate moments. According to Emanuel,
the paintings are loaded with religious meaning,
where humans obey the plan of the Almighty
by creating life and turning to ashes. The room
has unique acoustics, with a 20 seconds delay
of echoes and is occasionally used for concerts.
The sombre lighting encompassing the room
creates an effect of estrangement, and it takes
time while your eyes get used to it before you can
make out the details. In a separate hall Emanuel’s
drawings, found under the roof by an electrician,
are displayed. If you are wondering where the
creator of this painted universe reposes, then
take a look at the stone on top of the door – in
its carved insides lie the ashes of E. Vigeland. The
doorway is purposefully made lower in order to
exert a bow from the visitors.

contents of one or two duplicate items of the

collection, since it features a giant Absolut bottle,
a horror room, a slide, and a sex doll.
 should mention Michael and Bubbles by J.Koons
(a porcelain and gold plated sculpture of Michael
Jackson and his pet chimpanzee Bubbles), D.
Hirst’s Mother and Child Divided (bodies of a cow
and a calf cut in half in formaldehyde-filled glass
cases) and A.Kiefer’s installations and collages. In
addition to parts of the collection displayed in
the permanent exhibition, Rotasjoner, there are
temporary exhibitions. The current one is by the
Brazilian artist Ernesto Neto and is called Intimacy,
which circulates around soft objects and sensual
ROCK
3 CARVINGS
shapes in light cheerful colours, evoking feelings
of tranquility.

Directions: Chemistry building on campus.

For the Ekeberg site, take tram 17 or 18 to
Sjømannsskolen, cross the tram tracks, and go
5
CLIMBING CLIFFS
IN HAUKTJERN
towards the big building. The rocks are behind Directions: Take line 5 to Ullsrud, from there ask
the building, off to the left. for directions to Ullsrudsvannet
An unknown carver of a couple of moose figures You are wrong in thinking that sports facilities
probably never guessed that 4,000 years later in Blindern Athletica and Centrum Athletica are
his works will be considered part of the cultural the only places where one can give in to climbing
heritage and definitely the oldest graffiti in the instincts. You do not have to go far to try climbing
whole of Oslo. Rock carvings or “petroglyph” are in the wild! All you have to do is take a T-bane and
most prominent in Alta, in the north of Norway walk for a couple of kilometres. Hauktjern offers
and in Sweden, but one can get a glimpse of them cliffs of varying degree of difficulty, some suitable
also in the capital. They have most probably been for beginners and some capable of puzzling even
made in the Bronze Age by groups of hunters. The the most experienced climbers. Most of the
meaning of the petroglyphs has been puzzling cliffs are supplied by a metal hook for effortless
anthropologists for years. Common motifs in rock fastening of the rope. Try climbing outside before
carvings include hunt scenes, animals, humans it gets cold and you will never want to climb
and boats. In Oslo, however, there is a depiction another plastic imitation. The Monthly Moose
of a bird and an round object interpreted as a encourages readers to observe safety rules and
trap. Apparently less creative representatives of avoid being belayed by enemies if possible.
the Bronze Age made so-called “cup-marks”, small
round engravings of around 4 cm in diameter and
1 cm deep. Those are often found near graves
,which allows scientists to speculate about their
function in sacrifices.

4 ASTRUP FEARNLEY MODERN ART

MUSEUM
Directions: Dronningensgate 4 (city centre, east
of Town Hall, enormous brick building with large
metal doors) // Opening hours: Wednesday-
Sunday from 12 to 17 // Entrance fee: Ordinary
60, Student 30 // Special: guided tour on Sundays
for 50 NOK extra
When two large art collections by Hans Rasmus
Astrup andThomas Fearnley were united under one
TOP 5 // 15

roof, it was clear that the foundations were laid for

one of the most important museums of American
and European modern art. However, the growing
collections include some Norwegian works as
well. Among the highlights of the collection one
16 \\ Glacier travelogue

On the way to Edvard

Munch’s Summer House
 Glacier travelogue // 17

pictures by Summer Choi

and Sara Fegelman
 The REAL
Oktoberfest
AKA: “Where to go next
year instead of that amateur
Chateau Neuf shit show”
To protect
the identities of the (not-so) innocent,
I’m going to use pseudonyms for the main characters. Reasons for
same name choices will become evident as the story unfolds. The
cast list is as follows:
Bo, Sleepy, Fifty, Dutchie, The Elite, Pissy, Clumsy, Bunny - your faithful narrator... and
other people I don’t really remember because I met them after 4pm.
So off we went - Bunny, Bo and Sleepy, to
meet with Fifty and some other hot Ger-
man mommas on the eve of the most
morbid and deranged drinking day I’ve
ever experienced. At the bar, the hand-
some and usually captivating Sleepy
stayed true to his name. In the middle of
some very thoughtful point or compelling
sentence, Sleepy conked out. This was not
just some narcoleptic lapse, it was a full-
fledged loss of consciousness. The gig-
gling girls around poked him with their
little pink drink umbrellas, but even the
mortifying embarrassment of losing face
in front of five cute ladies wouldn’t wake
this slumbering friend.
18 \\ The REAL Oktoberfest
The next morning: 8am. We were awake,
lacing up our dirndls and buckling our
leather shoes. It was drinking time.
9am. Weisswurst frühstuck. We ate
those delicious white sausages and
pretzels, washing them down with pints
of Weissbier until we were ready to pick
up Clumsy and Pissy at the train station.
We forgot Dutchie with the Elites in their
fabulous fairground-side apartment, but
he didn’t mind. Free beer abounded!
Like good little buddies, Clumsy and Pissy
were already “ganz besoffen” and ready
to buy more beer. When we got back,
the Weisswurst Elite’s home had turned
into a madhouse: drunkards stumbling
everywhere. It was not a good scene. We
had to get out of there. But first, we had
to relieve ourselves. Our good friend Pissy
didn’t quite make it to the bathroom. I
guess a coffee cup full of rum for breakfast
wasn’t exactly the best idea.
Once at the fairgrounds, our drunken
rabble mixed with thousands of other
drunken rabbles to create one big drunken
crowd. The time was now 1pm and we
were off our shits.
We stumbled (literally) upon a free table in
one of the traditional 200-year anniversary
tents. This one had those old fashioned
ceramic “krugs” that make a classic sound
when you knock them together in toast.
We took Dutchie’s suggestion and banged
our krugs on the table before and after
each “prost!”, effectively annoying our
neighbors and drenching the table around
us in beer. With the next prost, it started.
Clumsy banged his krug a bit too hard
next to his plate of unidentified processed
meat, causing the plate to self-destruct.
Next prost: Bunny holds out her full glass
of beer with a drunken smile and brings
back half a glass, and no beer. Now Bo’s Shot of Jäger at the bar. More dancing. Don’t
lederhosen were soaked in almost the remember. Bo got verbally assaulted by woman
exact same spot as Pissy’s were before... in the bathroom. Why was he in the women’s
with an even more lamentable substance toilet? Don’t remember.
than urine: spilled beer!

The next evening we went for a

There was a sober (though well hung over)
slap dance and a tour around the Oktoberfest
whip dance and a fairgrounds. Facts confirmed:
fantastic Bavarian
1. It is, indeed, a real place.
oom pa pa band.
2. It is friggin huge! The biggest
Next tent:
fair I’ve ever been to.
Hofbräu. This
was an enormous 3. There are a ton of expensive
pavilion with an but cool looking rides.
absolutely fantastic
band and plenty 4. Everyone looks 100,000,000
more beer to replace times cuter when wearing
the ones we spilled. dirndls or lederhosen.
A couple of songs
and dances stand out 5. They really do stop serving
beer at 10 o’clock. ...So you’ve
The REAL Oktoberfest // 19

in my foggy memory,
like disco-dancing got to start early. As I’m
with randomers to a writing this, 4 days later and
Bavarian rendition of hangover just finally passing,
“I will survive.” I guess I still say it was an epic,
the tent closed at ten. great, amazing time. Highly
recommended!

Trip from Oktoberfest to bar near

Marienplatz: Don’t remember. Text & Photo: Bunny
 Films to Watch:
Nordic Council
Film Prizes
Films To See:
Nordic Council
Did you know that the Nordic countries actually shoot quite a lot of films? Non-conventional, subdued,
nestled in Nordic reality, they create a counterpoint to the conventions of Hollywood and often reach
Film Prizes
international audiences, like in the case of Lars von Trier, Ingmar Bergman and Aki Kaurismäki. In order
to support and encourage film-makers the jury of the Nordic council (Nordisk råd) nominates one film
from each of the five countries for a prize every year. This year on October 20, the prize of 350,000 DKK
will be awarded for the seventh time.
It has already become a tradition to hold a weekend
of screenings of the nominated films in the cinema
Gimle during the last weekend of September. I was
kindly invited by my former teachers Ellen Rees
and Elisabeth Oxfeldt to a sumptuous cinematic
feast and a few glasses of wine. Here is this year’s
jury’s selection, which is a must to watch for those
interested in European cinema.
DENMARK: SUBMARINO
Director: Thomas Vinterberg

The Scandinavian film gourmands know

Vinterberg as the right hand of Lars von Trier. He
was his co-author in launching the Dogma95
manifesto, which encouraged directors to
refrain from using superficial effects and made
screenplays adopt the Aristotelian laws of unity
of space, time and place. Unlike his critically-
acclaimed movie Festen, his new film is as far from
Dogma as possible, although the themes of the
difficult childhood influencing the adult dominate
in both. The main characters of Submarino are two
brothers living on the brink of social and personal
tragedy. Connected by a traumatic childhood,
they make hapless attempts to reconnect and
start a new life. One of the clear messages of the
film is the impossibility of starting from a clean
slate and the force of love and redemption. In
order to bring reality into his film, Vintererg and his
crew submerged themselves in the lower working
class area of Copenhagen and mingled with the
homeless and drug-addicts. This, together with
dark, nuanced colors and an intense soundtrack
creates a tangible picture of the underworld. The
20 \\ Nordic Films

jury points out the film’s contradictory effect on

the viewer: “unsentimental and yet gentle, tough
and yet empathetic […] simple and complex film
about broken souls and hope of healing.”
FINLAND: STEAM OF LIFE/MIESTEN VUORO
Directors: Joonas Berghäll & Mika Hotakainen

The Finnish submission is the only documentary

film in this year’s selection. According to the director Mika Hotakainen, he had planned the movie
after several sessions in Finland’s oldest public sauna in Tampere and listening to the soliloquies of
the men telling nothing but naked truth about their lives and daily struggles. He decided to share
these stories with the rest of the world, which positioned quite a lot of technical problems in front
of him: the cameras had to be heated to the temperature of around 80 C, and the whole crew had
to show solidarity by being naked. The immense material had to be condensed into a tangible story,
where men share their sensitive sides and talk about difficult topics such as death, parenthood, love
and friendship. Hotakainen uses the Finnish sauna an exotic means of achieving the goal that other
nations achieve in other ways, namely, the
feeling of unity, compassion and intimacy.
Majestic landscapes set in bluish tones
accompany the film’s gentle melancholy
and warm humor. The jury stresses the film’s
cleansing effect on mind and soul.

ICELAND: THE GOOD HEART

Director: Dagur Kári

Icelander Dagur Kári, the author of the

award-winning film Noí Albinoí, decided to
set his present film in New York. Two lonely
hearts, Lucas, a naïve teenager from under
the Brooklyn Bridge, and Jacques, a cynical
bar owner, meet in a hospital. What starts
off as the latter’s plan to make Lucas a heir
of his property ends in a challenge for the
both characters’ worldviews, where one of
them eventually serves as the reason for
the survival of the other. Consistent to his
views, Kári wrote a screenplay for this film
himself and, as he pointed out, he wished
to combine the artistic touch of the art
house cinema with the lightheartedness
and the intimacy of a sitcom. The movie
stresses the importance of a wholehearted
relationship to other human beings, as
opposed to the heartlessness of the city
and the inadvertency of fate. It also explains
why life is like a coconut. The jury states
that despite the setting in the USA, the film,
through its humor and fairytale atmosphere
communicates the feel of the Icelandic
Sagas.
Nordic Films // 21

NORWAY: UPPERDOG
Director: Sara Johnsen

Upperdog offers a seemingly playful,yet critical insight into the welfare society that Norway claims to
be. Accompanied by the lightweight music by Mozart, the unfolding and intertwining stories of the
four young people reveal the complexities of power relationships and put the classlessness of Norway
under question. The viewer witnesses a reunion of two adopted and separated siblings, an immigrant
worker striving to study Norwegian people, and a young soldier’s thorny way from public shame
 to reconciliation. Sara Johnsen uses situational
humor and various experimental cinematic effects
such as crosscutting to create tangible metaphors.
In jury’s opinion the film comments on the political
and social climate in Norway while communicating
intimate emotions of young people in a mature and
elegant way.
SWEDEN: METROPIA
Director: Tarik Saleh

Despite the seriousness of topics and the feeling of

realism, created by meticulously designed sets and
textures, Metropia is an animation film. In words
and in practice the director argues that animation
should be considered a technique, not a genre: he
refrains from the emphasized theatrical gestures,
characteristic for animation, and sticks to the bleak
nuanced patterns while picturing the dystopian
near future of the world. The main character in
Metropia searches for answers in the underground
system of world full of voyeurism, surveillance and
paranoia. What he finds is a femme fatale, both a
confederate and an enemy who changes his world
forever and yet returns him to the starting point. The
jury emphasizes the “visual strength” and the eye-
catching effect of the movie and its topicality in the
world of today.
AFTERWORD:
The winner of the award will be announced on
October 20th after this issue of The Moose has been
published. It is truly a challenge to predict which of
the films will be given the award this time. However,
it is my personal conviction that Norway an immense
chance of winning the competition. This assumption
is partially influenced by the fact that Norway has
never won the prize, but also builds on the aesthetic
qualities of the film. Upperdog, which concentrates
on the point of view of a woman, is in sharp contrast
with the man-dominated perspectives of the other
nominated films, and manages to approach serious
and topical questions elegantly and humorously.
For more information on the Nordic film prize and trailers:
http://www.nordicfilmandtvfund.com/feature_home.php?sid=90&ptid=25
The Nordic film prize weekend featuring screening of all the nominees, interviews with directors
and wine is arranged every last weekend of September at the Gimle cinema in Oslo. Films are
22 \\ Nordic FIlms

shown with English subtitles, and regular ticket prices apply.

Text: Marija Cabuskina

Pictures: with written permission of Nordic Film and TV Fund
Ancient Romans knew what to claim from their
rulers: when the elections drew near, they all
turned into a crowd yelling “Bread and games!”
However primitive that might be compared to
the sophisticated political demands of today, The
Monthly Moose believes that as a student you
place equal importance on material and spiritual
nurture. And we also believe you have the right to
demand it. That’s why every month we’ll publish
a review of one food place and one fun activity.
The Monthly Moose is not connected to any of
the places/activities we promote however much
we’d love to be.
Bread
Eating out in Norway is challenging. Ordering
dishes that involve meat has an even more
devastating effect on your financial resources.
This was part of my excuse for giving the vegan
food served in a place called The Loving Hut
(located at Parkveien 6A) a try. However baffling
it may sound from the mouth of a convicted and
convinced carnivore, I really did it. For science.
The experiment involved two generous spring
rolls with carrot, onion and tofu, and a vegan
burger featuring fresh and pickled vegetables
with a grilled soy patty – and a deduction of only
118 NOK from my account. While the dishes were
being prepared, I was told that the bread and
the mayonnaise are made on the spot in order to
secure the absence of animal-related products in
them. Prompted by my discussion of the owner,
I googled The Loving Hut and learned that it is
a world-wide company ruled by the Supreme
Master Ching Hai of Taiwan. The place in Oslo
is the first and only restaurant of this kind in
Norway, and, like most Loving Huts, is run semi-
independently by a family of convinced vegans.
The menu includes spring and summer rolls,
sandwiches, hamburgers, salads, noodle and
rice dishes and is to be expanded. They are also
famous for their fresh juices, smoothies, rice drinks
and soy milk based coffee drinks, of which the
Sweet Chilli Mocha deserves special attention,.
Although I have to admit that it will take more
than fantastically delicious food to convert me to
the vegan lifestyle, I still appreciated the meal for
what it was – tasty and reasonable.
Games
I hereby address the people who know more than
ten digits of Pi, the people who know the names
of all the presidents of Kenya and the people who
are bursting with equally useless knowledge and
looking for ways of getting rewarded for it. If you
like answering tricky questions in the company
of friends, you should definitely give an activity
known as “pub trivia” or “pub quiz” a try. For those
outside of the US and the UK, quiz is a game
where teams comprising 5-6 members write down
answers to the questions posed by a quizmaster,
relying on only their general knowledge (no
mobile phones or internet use allowed!) The
answers can be amended at any time before the
round is finished. At the end of each round the
answers are checked, and the team which gets
the most answers correct wins a prize. For a low-
threshold start try the quizzes at Amatøren (in
Sogn) on Thursdays and at Velferden (in Kringsjå)
on Wednesdays. At the latter, you can also
attempt being a quizmaster. If you are capable
of luring one or more Norwegians to join your
team, you can go out on the town and try one of
these Thursday evening quiz venues: Katedralen
(where the quizmaster speaks from the pulpit),
Studenten (if you feel lucky with music from the
previous century) and Copa con Oro (if you prefer
winning coffee to beer). If you feel that alcohol
and mental activity are incompatible, try the
Storsalen church on Saturday evenings. Be aware
that Norwegians take their quizzes seriously and
you will most probably need to book a spot in
advance. A list of ongoing quizzes can be found
at: http://www.norgesquizforbund.no/index.
php?location=pubquiz.
Text by Marija Cabuskina
Photo by John Modin
Bread and Games // 23
 Why I came to
Norway
It has been almost two months since I arrived
here in Norway. It feels like I just arrived here
few days ago, but it’s already two months! Do
you remember the day you stepped into your
new room in Oslo? How did you feel? Excited?
Worried? Well, I cannot quite remember how I
felt when I arrived here. All I remember is that I
just needed some sleep because I was so tired.
But, I know that I had my goals and reasons
why I came here. Now, here’s a question for
you. What were your goals when you first came
here? And do you still have those goals?
My goal here in Oslo is EXPERIENCE. This
includes having international friends, studying,
traveling and working. Okay, I will be honest.
Studying is not that much of my interest here.
I can say I have done enough studying back
in Korea (I am from SOUTH Korea; many of
you ask this), and I am very well sure that I will
probably have to study a lot when I go back.
This means I never feel like studying so much
here. So, let’s talk about experiences other than
24 \\ Why Norway
studying.
Having international friends means a lot to
me. They help me try out new things, which
is a good thing. For example, I am not much
of a clubbing person. Dancing is the last thing
I would choose as my hobby. Just moving
my arms back and forth, legs up and down
all the time is what I call dancing. I can say
that I am the worst dancer on the earth. BUT
I am trying to go to parties or clubs these
days, and international friends I have made
here are the ones who are actually helping
me to change. It is a good sign for me since
at least I am trying out new things. Sorry to
those who have to see me dance. Next time
you see a girl struggling with dancing at a
party that will definitely be me!
Traveling experience is also very important.
Norway is the first European country I have
ever visited. I have traveled to many countries
all around the world, but not Europe. I am
trying to visit other cities in Europe over the

weekends. Since I don’t study much here
(which is the part that I’m not that proud
of) I have a lot of free time. Guess what?
I am in Oslo only for 17 days in October.
I will be off to other cities in and out of
Norway. By traveling, I am sure I will be
able to gain a broader perspective.
The last one is the working experience.
I don’t have any experience working,
except private tutoring a few students
after school. So, it is quite hard to say I
actually had a job before. I can’t imagine
having a job during the semester back
in my home country. There are so many
things to study and everyone has a very
tight schedule. But it is different here. I
have so much free time. I am looking for a
place to work here in Oslo, and am doing
an internship at the Korean embassy. It
is quite a pity that the embassy doesn’t
pay me, but I am happy that I can actually
learn things here.
In short, my goals here in Oslo for one
year are to have as many experiences as
possible. I hope having experiences here
would help me decide what to do with my
life after graduation.
Have you thought of the goal you brought
here with you? Now, look back into
yourself for the last two months. Can
you say you did your best to achieve this
goal? If not, you’d better get on to it. You
wouldn’t want to go back with nothing in
your hands.
JeeHee Hwang
Processing time
a story the length of a year
Sometimes, one needs a lot of patience and a good
nervous system to get a long-awaited student visa
for one year.
Besides having an awful time with visa extension,
which takes up to 6 months for the renewal
of a student permit, other annoying things
can happen: the fact of parts of documents
disappearing into nowhere, which must be sent
again; misinterpretation of regulations; degrading
treatment; careless examination of documents; and
an information service that does not know very
much. I have experienced those things and more
during the last year.
Everything started from the usual visa renewal
process for study year 2009-2010. As a bachelor
student on a self-financing program, I have to show
a certain amount of money every year, which can be
given as a printout of account or an employment
contract. After 3 months of handling my case, UDI
informed me that I did not show enough money to
support myself for the entire study year.
This was not true, because I had a job and earned
the demanded sum of money-- approximately 83
thousand NOK, that I proved with a contract.
I had been asked to send in a written statement
outlining how many hours per week I would work
and how much money I would earn.
The point was that the place where I worked was the
commune and since we, students, can work only
20 hours a week, according to their regulations, we
could get a contract only for half a year; from January
UDI Disaster // 25
2010 I was supposed to sign a new one.
The demanded document could not be obtained
and in December 2009 I had to change jobs, and
here begins that most interesting part, showing the
real face of Norwegian bureaucracy.
...continued on page 26
 Processing time
a story the length of a year
Article continued from page 25.

At the new job I was asked to show a work permit, My woman’s intuition did not disappoint
which I could not show, since UDI was waiting for one me. The Norwegian embassy in Moscow,
document from me, which I could not get without a understanding the problem, gave me entry
work permit. permit. “Hurrah!!! I’m back to Norway. “
“No stay permit, no contract, no money,” I was told But, not everything was so perfect as it seemed.
on one side, “no employment contract, no visa, no It was the end of March and I still did not have
work permit,” I heard from another side. I would a visa.
have liked to invite both sides for a cup of coffee to
acquaint them with each other and finally solve all Again, phone calls to UDI. Again, the old
my problems. story about the time to check the documents.
Nothing new with these guys.
But….
After almost 2 months, in May, I had got a
After a couple of months of useless calls to different letter from my “old friends.”  In that letter it was
bureaucratic organizations, I found a useful one: written that I was not given a visa and had to
“Jussbuss”. These guys wrote the required papers leave the country before June if I did not write
to both sides and seemingly everybody got what an appeal.  The reason was simple: “Did not
they wanted, but I still did not have any visa in my show enough financial support for the entire
passport. UDI needed time again to “check” the study year.” Almost the same like it was in
documents. November!  So all this half-year was down the
drain? Did not show enough financial support
In March 2010 I had to travel to Russia for one week, for the study year that was about to finish?
but without a visa I could not come back.  Not
coming back meant missing midterm exams, and as This was unreasonable.
a consequence, losing access to the final exams.
The only place I could ask for help was
On my claim to speed up the process due to Jussbuss. In one week time a complaint was
the situation, UDI first asked me to fax them the written and I stayed again in Oslo to prepare
tickets, which would be passed to the procedural for the summer exams.
department to accelerate the process. One week
passed, nothing. Week after week, nothing new. It seemed like
UDI was not going to check my complaint, and
After several phone calls from me, they asked for a it was obvious that after 31 of August all this
document from the university, confirming my exams would not matter anymore.
in March. One more week, nothing new. It seemed
that they like different documents, fax, confirming The study year was finishing, and it was time
letters, paper, papers… to apply for the new one, 2010-2011. This
time everything was much easier: I received a
After every talk with customer service, which told scholarship, which meant “bye-bye” to proving
me a different story every time and treated me as an financial competence.
unimportant creature with unimportant problems, I
was mentally depressed. I could not concentrate on But this was not the end of unpredictable
my studies during those days. The only thing I could developments. In July 2010 I had to travel
do was to do nothing. I could just sit and think about again to Russia.  This time was much worse,
how it is possible that, in the most expensive country since it involved two opened cases at UDI: one
26 \\ UDI Disaster

in Europe, with the highest level of well-being, an from last year concerning the permit that was
international student can be like in a prison, without about to expire, and one for next year. Despite
permission to travel to the home country and visit the fact that my case was labeled as urgent,
his or her family. it did not seem that I would avoid paperwork
this time.
In this situation, neither Jussbuss, which interprets
the law differently than UDI, nor the advocate from After successfully solving problems with the
the commune could help me, and I decided to rely visa via the Norwegian embassy in Moscow, I
on my good luck and travel anyway. decided to do the same this time, since there
was no other choice.
The Norwegian embassy in Moscow had got a
new ambassador right before I came there. A
new board means new rules, which were not
in my favour. Nobody there believed that I still
had not gotten a visa, and after my explanation,
to justify the truth, or perhaps something else,
they demanded a full package of documents.
Again? I had just done it, one month previously!
Couldn’t the information be checked through
the common database? Why should I have to
gather the same paper again and again? Right,
to check the information; every bureaucratic
cell wants to have its own information, to feel
kind of cool.
“All right, the documents are delivered, it’s one
week before the new semester starts, I can wait
here couple of days, in the capital of Russia,
the biggest and most crowded city in Europe;
I’ll find a place to stay for a while and use the
chance to see some sights,” I thought that day. It seemed that I could wait till New Year, if not for
But inspection was delayed for longer than I Jussbuss and my friend who went to the University’s
expected.
Checking out here, checking out there, this 
was driving me crazy! I could think that I
was applying to some goverment military
expedition to Mars or negotiations with
extraterrestrial beings.
This time the focus of my telephone became
the embassy, and every day during that week
I heard the same phrase: “We are processing
your case, call us tomorrow”.
After one week of nervous waiting I had got
that answer, but not one that I expected. I was
not given a visa. The reason was simple to the
point of absurdity: “Does not have a residence
permit and did not apply for renewal of permit
for the next study year.” This was of course
just a typically standard phrase for rejection
without reason.
Standing in the middle of a megalopolis with
the most unbelievable, unreasonable and
incongruous letter I have ever got, I did not
feel like a “big big girl in a big big world”. Having no
place to live, being almost homeless, starting to lose
school days; in that situation the only question that
filled my mind was “what to do.” The main problem
was still UDI. Call them again?
UDI.  These three letters does not only mean the
abbreviation of the name of the organization. This
is a clear example of people who do not care at all.
On my requests to talk to the department that was
handing my case I have got rejection; on my asking
to understand the situation about missing the school
and handle the case in shortest time I received a
very clear response - that was my problem. I should
not have left the country, but waited till receiving a
resident permit in Norway. Am I a prisoner?  I was
already waiting for more than a year. When would
this absurdity with paperwork be finished? How long
would I be stuck in Moscow? Nobody could answer
these questions.
student office, whom I called the same day and asked
to influence UDI somehow.
Difficult to believe, but these two organizations had
done their job. I got my visa the next day, and the
Norwegian embassy, as if nothing had happened,
gave me back my passport with a long-awaited entry
permit.
So I am again back in Norway, for the second time
this year, exhausted from Russia but happy to be
at home. Two weeks of lectures and groups were
missed. But this is nothing compared to the fact that I
could have been stuck out of the Schengen zone for
a much longer period. Probably, I am little bit lucky,
probably not, but those two weeks seemed to me like
UDI Disaster // 27
two months.
I shared my experience with you to show one of the
sides of being an international student in Norway,
and to demonstrate how your life intentions can be
affected by the bureaucratic system.
Text by Nadya Alyeshkina
Illustration by Irine Osepashvili
 Skogens konge
Inngjerdet
mellom et økende antall

motorveier

i Norge
lever elgen

på stadig mindre områder

med stadig større evner

til å legge ut på lange

vandringer
28 \\ Skogens Herre

i sitt indre rike

Text:Ole Hansson

Photo: Marija Chabuskina

 ELGINT 0110 - The Moose Norwegian course

Learn Norwegian on your own, with a little help from

the Moose.

Text by Julie Rousseau

Illustrations by Irine Osepashvili

Lesson 2: Animal Friends

The word dyr means both “animal” as a noun (i.e. det er et
dyr) and “expensive” as an adjective (i.e. den dyre bilen). The
Moose of course believes that elg is the most important
animal to know, but here are some others.

Husdyr [house animals] refers to all farm animals and

cattle. On a trip to the countryside, you can see some kyr
(the irregular plural form of ku), sauer og hester. Be careful
not to be too stupid because people would then say that
du er en ordentlig sau [you are a proper sheep]. Do not eat
too much either, as you would then spise som en hest [eat
like a horse]. Rather, try to have it as good as it can be, som
kua i en grønn eng [like a cow in a green meadow].

As you probably noticed, Norwegians like fisk. Many

different things can be expressed with reference to fish.
If you fit right in, you trives som fisken i vannet [thrive
like a fish in the water]. If it is verken fugl eller fisk [neither
bird nor fish], it is neither one nor the other. When you
accept something, you tar for god fisk [take [it] for good
fish]. So whether you prefer torsk [cod], sild [herring],
laks [salmon] or ørret [trout], make sure you eat some to
stay frisk som en fisk [healthy as a fish]!

If you are not so fond of the countryside, try to get

acquainted with some city-dwelling kjæledyr (pets,
literally “petting animals”). Whether you are a hund or
katt person, there are plenty of four-legged friends (and
pet owners) to meet in Oslo.

Watching an Ole Brumm [Winnie The Pooh] episode can be an interesting activity too. Ole Brumm’s name is
derived from the “brumm brumm” sound that the bjørn [bear] makes. I have personally never heard a Norwegian
bear, but from their sound they seem more funny than scary. Piglet is similarly known as Nasse Nøff, because
the Norwegian gris [pig] apparently makes the sound “nøff nøff”—
here again, I have some doubts. Tigger is Tigergutt [tiger boy],
and the owl is Ugla (like in the name of the Filologiske forening
pub Uglebo). The next time you do not want to go out with your
friends, just ligge bjørn [be a bear]. Stay home in your pyjamas
and watch some cartoons in Norwegian. Mikke Mus is also fun
på norsk.

The little kid in you should also take note that stuffed animals
are known in Norway as kosedyr. Children thus learn early the
ELGINT // 29

significance of one of the most Norwegian verbs, å kose seg. This

verb (and the related adjective koselig) is kin to the cocooning
phenomenon, but also includes all kinds of feel-good activities,
preferably by candlelight. Ha det koselig! [Have it cosy!]
30 \\ Moose Comic Strip

The Monthly Moose

Comic Strip by Irine Osepashvili

Moose Comic Strip // 31

* We’re going the same way, so why don’t
you hop on?
*