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REGARDING FAMILY, FATHER, MOTHER AND WIFE

H.Qur’aan: Surah:2 Verse:223. Your wives are as a tilth unto you; so approach your tilth when or how ye will; but do
some good act for your souls beforehand; and fear Allah. And know that ye are to meet Him (in the Hereafter), and give
(these) good tidings to those who believe.

9: 24. Say: If it be that your fathers, your sons, your brothers, your mates, or your kindred; the wealth that ye have gained;
the commerce in which ye fear a decline: or the dwellings in which ye delight - are dearer to you than Allah, or His
Messenger, or the striving in His cause;- then wait until Allah brings about His decision: and Allah guides not the
rebellious.

4: 34. Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allah has given the one more (strength) than the other,
and because they support them from their means. Therefore the righteous women are devoutly obedient, and guard in (the
husband's) absence what Allah would have them guard. As to those women on whose part ye fear disloyalty and ill-
conduct, admonish them (first), (Next), refuse to share their beds, (And last) beat them (lightly); but if they return to
obedience, seek not against them Means (of annoyance): For Allah is Most High, great (above you all).

3: 28. O Prophet! Say to thy Consorts: "If it be that ye desire the life of this World, and its glitter,- then come! I will
provide for your enjoyment and set you free in a handsome manner.(Allah tells the same to all human kind)

33: 29. But if ye seek Allah and His Messenger, and the Home of the Hereafter, verily Allah has prepared for the well-
doers amongst you a great reward. (Allah tells the same to all human kind)

33: 30. O Consorts of the Prophet! If any of you were guilty of evident unseemly conduct, the Punishment would be
doubled to her, and that is easy for Allah.

33: 31. But any of you that is devout in the service of Allah and His Messenger, and works righteousness, - to her shall
We grant her reward twice: and We have prepared for her a generous Sustenance.

33: 32. O Consorts of the Prophet! Ye are not like any of the (other) women: if ye do fear (Allah), be not too complacent
of speech, lest one in whose heart is a disease should be moved with desire: but speak ye a speech (that is) just.

33: 33. And stay quietly in your houses, and make not a dazzling display, like that of the former Times of Ignorance; and
establish regular Prayer, and give regular Charity; and obey Allah and His Messenger. And Allah only wishes to remove
all abomination from you, ye members of the Family, and to make you pure and spotless.

33: 34. And recite what is rehearsed to you in your homes, of the Signs of Allah and His Wisdom: for Allah understands
the finest mysteries and is well-acquainted (with them).

33: 35. For Muslim men and women, - for believing men and women, for devout men and women, for true men and
women, for men and women who are patient and constant, for men and women who humble themselves, for men and
women who give in Charity, for men and women who fast (and deny themselves), for men and women who guard their
chastity, and for men and women who engage much in Allah's praise,- for them has Allah prepared forgiveness and great
reward

33: 36. It is not fitting for a Believer, man or woman, when a matter has been decided by Allah and His Messenger to
have any option about their decision: if any one disobeys Allah and His Messenger, he is indeed on a clearly wrong Path.

33: 55. There is no blame (on these ladies if they appear) before their fathers or their sons, their brothers, or their brother's
sons, or their sisters' sons, or their women, or the (slaves) whom their right hands possess. And, (ladies), fear Allah; for
Allah is Witness to all things.
33: 59. O Prophet! Tell thy wives and daughters, and the believing women, that they should cast their outer garments
over their persons (when abroad): that is most convenient, that they should be known (as such) and not molested. And
Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.

43: 70. Enter ye the Garden, ye and your wives, in (beauty and) rejoicing.

66: 3. When the Prophet disclosed a matter in confidence to one of his consorts, and she then divulged it (to another),
and Allah made it known to him, he confirmed part thereof and repudiated a part. Then when he told her thereof, she said,
"Who told thee this?”He said, "He told me Who knows and is well-acquainted (with all things)."

66: 4. If ye two turn in repentance to Him, your hearts are indeed so inclined; But if ye back up each other against him,
truly Allah is his Protector, and Gabriel, and (every) righteous one among those who believe,- and furthermore, the angels
- will back (him) up.

66: 10. Allah sets forth, for an example to the Unbelievers, the wife of Noah and the wife of Lut: they were (respectively)
under two of our righteous servants, but they were false to their (husbands), and they profited nothing before Allah on
their account, but were told: "Enter ye the Fire along with (others) that enter!"

66: 11. And Allah sets forth, as an example to those who believe the wife of Pharaoh: Behold she said: "O my Lord!
Build for me, in nearness to Thee, a mansion in the Garden, and save me from Pharaoh and his doings, and save me from
those that do wrong";

HADEETH collections:

Wherever “Allah” occurs, the Glorification “Subhanahu wa Taala" MUST follow it. Wherever “Prophet” or
“Muhammad” occurs, the benediction "Salallahu Alaihi Wasallam" should accompany it. When the name of a
companion occurs, it should be followed by “Radhiu Allah Anhu" or “Anha” as is appropriate.

A few useful hints: In the references the letter “B" stands for Bukhari; “M" is for Muslim; “A.D” is for Abu
Dawud and “MM" is for Mishkat Masabih. When a reference is given as Bl-87-115, it means Bukhari, volume 1,
page 87, number 115.

Who is given 4 things is given good in this world and Hereafter (1) A grateful hear; (2) Remembering tongue (3) patience
in calamity (4) Pious wife (Baihaqi) MM1-520-177 W

Paradise prohibited to 3 (1) ---------; (3) A careless husband who establishes impurity in the family (Ahmad) MM2-572-
163

When a man calls his wife to satisfy his desire, let her come even if she is occupied at the oven (Tirmizi)-MM1-211-61

The disobedient, divorce-seeking woman is a hypocrite (Nisai) MM1-437-155

The believer who is perfect in faith is he whose behaviour is best and those who are best to their wives MM1-213-68

No woman annoys her husband - his wife among the wide-eyed maidens of Paradise say - do not annoy him, he is only a
passing guest with you (Tirmizi) MM1-211-62

If anyone corrupts a wife against her husband, he is not from us AD3-1428-5151

And order your wife to wear a garment below it and not show her figure AD3-1148-4104

A man will not be asked as to why he beat his wife AD2-574-2142


- Should not give gift from husband's property without his permission AD2-1007-3540

- Umar (Radhiallaahu Anhu) said: “A mat in a house is better than a childless woman” AD3-1099-3911

If I were to command anyone to prostrate before another, I will command wives to prostrate to their
husbands AD2-574-2135

- When a man calls his wife to bed and she refuses and does not come, and he spends the night angry, angels
curse her until morning AD2-574-2136

The best treasure a man should hoard - a virtuous wife who pleases him ---- who obeys him ----- AD2-437-1660

If you forgetfully have sex with menstruating wife, you have to give alms AD1-66-264

- Woman ‘dolling up’ before non-mahram, withdrawing penis before ejaculation, among 10 things disliked by
Prophet (Sallalahu Alayhi Wa Salam) AD1-1172-4210

- Having intercourse with nursing mother is 1 of 10 things disliked by Prophet (Sallalahu Alayhi Wa
Salam)AD1-1172-4210 (Compare with M2-736-3312

When a woman menstruates, you can associate with her and do everything except sexual intercourse:AD1-64-258

- Aisha (Radhiallaahu Anha) says Prophet (Sallalahu Alayhi Wa Salam) put his head in her lap and recited Qur’an
while she was in menses AD1-65-260 (Not to touch Qur’aan, but can recite by mouth)

One may tell lies to his wife to please her M4-1374-6303; AD3-1371-4903

None should spend night with married woman except his wife or he is Mahram M3-1186-5399

A married adulterer should be stoned to death M3-898-4152

The best object of benefit of the world is a pious woman M2-752-3465

The most wicked among people in sight of Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala) on Day of Judgement is he who divulges the
secret of his wife M2-732-3369 (secret means here, bedroom matters, sexual relations telling to friends)

Should not fast without husband's permission M2-491-2238

When woman spends night away from bed of husband, angels curse her until morning M2-732-3366

- Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala) is displeased with her until the husband is pleased with her M2-732-3367

The lady is guardian and responsible for husband's house and children B7-98-128

- Men are protectors and maintainers of women Q4:34, B7-98-CH

Should not fast Naffil without husband's permission if he is at home B7-92-120; 123

- Should not allow anyone to enter house without husband's permission B7-94-123, M2-491-2238

Man should not order his wife to do something sinful - it is sinful to suggest to wife to lengthen her hair artificially B7-
101-133

Man is guardian of his family ----; lady is guardian of husband’s house and offspring B2-8-18
- If you put food in your wife's mouth, it is charity B2-214-383, B7-202-266, B4-3-5, B7-388-572

Most inhabitants of hell are women. They are ungrateful to husbands... I have never seen any good from you B7-95-125,
M2-431-1982

If a husband calls his wife for sex, she refuses, he is angry. Angels curse her till morning B4-302-460, B7-93-121;
122, AD2-574-2136

- Paradise is at the feet of your mother (Ahmad) MM1-187-14

- Signs of the Hour - Man will obey wife and disobey mother (Tirmizi) MM4-43-72

Be good to parents B1-300-505, B4-35-41

Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala) has made illegal to you the ill treatment of your mothers B3-348-591

The second best deed is to be good to parents B4-35-41, B8-1-1

It is one of the greatest sins that a man should curse his parents (he does so by abusing the parents of others) B8-3-4,
M1-53-162, AD3-1423-5122

Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala) has forbidden you to be undutiful to your parents - that you withhold or demand - and
Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala) disliked talking about others, asking too many questions or wasting property B8-6-6

The biggest of the great sins is to worship others with Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala), then being undutiful to parents
B8-6-7

The second of the great sins is ill treatment of parents B3-499-821

Who is entitled with best companionship by me: "Your mother, Your mother, Your mother, Your Father"

B8-2-2, M4-1354-6180

Do not claim someone as your father who is not B3-232-422, M1-41-118; 120

- Put in the best efforts in their service M4-1354-6184

- He who detested his father, committed infidelity M1-42-119

- Abu Hurairah (Radhiallaahu Anhu) did not perform pilgrimage until after his mother died, as he kept himself
busy in her service M3-886-4099

- Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala) curses him who curses his parents M3-1094-4877

- Who amongst people deserve my good treatment? Your mother, Your mother, Your mother, Your father, then
relatives according to closeness M4-1354-6181

Let him be humbled into dust who finds his parents in old age and do not serve them so as to enter Paradise M4-
1358-6189

- The finest act of goodness on the part of a son is to treat kindly the loved ones of his father M4-1358-6192,
AD3-1423-5124

The maternal aunt is like mother AD2-617-2271


I left my parents weeping. Prophet (Sallalahu Alayhi Wa Salam) said return and make them laugh as you made
them weep AD2-701-2522

You and your property belong to your father AD2-1002-3523

- A son does not repay what he owes to his father except, if his father is a slave, he buys and frees himAD3-
1422-5118

You can show kindness and obedience to parents after their death by praying for them, carrying out their
instructions, and honouring their friends AD3-1423-5123

Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala) will make your death easy if you have 3 things (1).... (2) Kindness to parents (3)....
(Tirmizi) MM1-187-17

- Nothing but obedience to parents can prolong life (Ibn Majah) MM1-182-7

The Pleasure of the Lord is in the pleasure of the father. (Tirmizi) MM1-183-8

- Man says my mother tells me to divorce my wife. Prophet (Sallalahu Alayhi Wa Salam) says a parent is the
best of the gates of Paradise - You can either guard or destroy it (Tirmizi) MM1-183-9

They are your Paradise and your Hell (Ibn Majah) MM1-187-16

- You will be punished in this life too for disobedience to parents (Baihaqi) MM1-188-29 W

- If you look on Parents with kindness - for every look will equal Hajj Mabrur (Baihaqi) MM1-188-30 W

- If you obey Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala) regarding parents, He opens the gates of Paradise for you, but if you
disobey Him, doors of Hell opened for you even if parents are oppressive to you (Baihaqi) MM1-188-31 W

- Paradise prohibited to 3- (1) -------; (2) One who is disobedient to parents; (3) --------; (Ahmad) MM2-572-163

- Prophet (Sallalahu Alayhi Wa Salam) gave me 10 counsels- (1) -----; (2) Do not be disobedient to parents even
if they direct you to go out from your family or property; (3) -------; (10)-------; (Ahmad) MM3-138-460 W

FAMILY: (Parents, wife, children)

- To maintain one's family sincerely for Allah's sake is a (kind of) alms B1-47-52

- If you miss Asr prayer intentionally it is as if you lost your family B1-309-527

- Man is guardian of his family B2-8-18

- Your family has a right over you; your body has a right over you B2-140-CH

- If you desire increase in provision and age - keep good relations with family B3-160-281

- Spending on your family is an act of charity B5-229-343

- If you spend on family for Allah’s (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala) Pleasure, it is Sadaqa B7-201-263

- Storing food for family for one year B7-204-270

- Return to your families and teach them B8-24-37


- If you believe in Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala) and last day, keep good relation with family B8-100-160

- The dinar producing greatest reward is that which one spends on his family M2-478-2181

- He who is killed defending his family is a martyr AD3-1337-4754

- The best of you is he who is best to his family - and I am the best of you to my family (Tirmizi) MM1-200-35

- Paradise is forbidden to three (1) ---- (2) ----- (3) a careless husband who establishes impurity in the family
(Ahmad) MM2-572-163

- Prophet (Sallalahu Alayhi Wa Salam) gave me 10 counsels (1) ---- (8) Spend on your family out of your
means; (9) ----- (10) ----- (Ahmad) MM3-138-460W

FATHER: In Hadeeth:

- Do not claim someone as your father who is not B3-232-422, B5-430-616

- Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala) has declared absolutely haram disobedience to father M3-929-4260

- Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala) curses him who (1) ----- (2) curses his father; (3) ----- M3-1094-4877

- The finest act of goodness on the part of a son is to treat kindly the loved ones of his father M4-1358-6192

- Both you and your wealth belongs to your father AD2-1002-3523

- A son does not repay what he owes to his father except if his father is a slave, he buys and frees him AD3-
1422-5118

- The Pleasure of Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala) is in the pleasure of the father -- the displeasure of Allah
(Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala) is in ------- (Tirmizi) MM1-183-8

- The right of the eldest brother over the youngest, is that of father over son (Baihaqi) MM1-240-41W

- Nobody can revoke his gift except a father from his children (Ibn Majah) MM2-318-20

- Signs of Hour - Man shall draw friend near and keep father remote (Tirmizi) MM4-43-72

PARENTS: Qur’aan Ayaths:

- Bequest to be made to parents -- 2: 180;

- Can receive Khairat -- 2: 215; 2:215. They ask thee what they should spend (In charity). Say: Whatever ye spend that
is good, is for parents and kindred and orphans and those in want and for wayfarers. And whatever ye do that is good, -
Allah knoweth it well.

- Be careful of your duty to mother -- 4: 1;

- Be kind to parents --- 4: 36;

- Be witnesses for Allah even against parents - 4: 135;

- Ten Commandments - be good to parents -- 6: 151-153;


- Our Lord! Forgive me, my parents and believers the day when the account is cast -- 14: 41;

- Show kindness to parents - if they attain old age with thee - say not to them "uf" - nor repulse them - speak to them
graciously - lower to them wing of submission and pray " My Lord! Have mercy on them ----" -- 17: 23-24;

- He was dutiful to his parents -- 19: 14;

- My Lord! Arouse me to be thankful -- Thou hast favoured me and my parents -- 27: 19;

- We have enjoined on man kindness to parents but if they strive --- 29: 8;

- We have enjoined on man about his parents - his mother bears him in pain - his weaning is 2 years - give thanks to
me and to thy parents - to Me is journeying - if they tell you to ascribe partners to Me - then obey them not - consort with
them - repent - to Me is your return - I shall tell you --- 31: 14-15; 46: 15;

- Fear a day when parent will not be able to help child -- 31: 33;

- We have commended to man kindness to parents - his mother bears him in pain - bearing and weaning 30 months -
when he attains full strength at 40 he says My Lord! arouse me that I may give thanks for the favour ---- and be gracious
unto me in the matter of my offspring - I have turned to Thee repentant and am of the Muslims -- 46: 15;

- Who saith to his parents “fie to you both - do you threaten me that I shall be brought forth ---"

and if they cry to Allah for help -- such are those who will be the losers -- 46: 17-18;

- My Lord! Forgive me and my parents and -- 71: 28;

MOTHER

- He brought you forth from wombs of mothers -- that you may give thanks -- 16: 78;

- He hath made me dutiful to my mother -- 19: 32;

- On the day when you behold it, every nursing mother will -- 22: 2;

- His mother bears him with pain - his weaning is in 2 years -- 31: 14;

- Nor hath He made your wives whom you ----- your mothers -- 33: 4;

- He created you in the wombs of your mothers - creation after creation -- 39: 6;

- His mother bears him with pain and brings him forth with pain -- 46: 15;

- Those who put away their wives by saying they are as their mothers - they are not their mothers -

Mothers are those who gave birth to them - they must free a slave, or fast 60 days or feed 60 poor before they touch
each other -- 58: 2-4;

Compiled by: Syed Noorullah Syed Siddique Ahmed.