12 Definitive Traits of a Middle Child able to mediate between the two and provide a balance
between the oldest and youngest,” Guarino says.
Birth order doesn’t automatically impact your personality.
But there are some common traits that middle children
share—beyond peacekeeping.
Middle children have strong friendships and
relationships
A middle child tends to prioritize relationships outside of
the family unit, according to Lisa Lewis, MD. “Middle
children, probably because they feel overlooked, will have
a tendency to create stronger friendships and long-term
relationships,” Lewis says. They rely more heavily on
relationships with their peers than with family as they see
outsiders meeting their needs for emotional support, Nedra
Glover Tawwab, Licensed Clinical Social Worker and
Owner of Kaleidoscope Counseling in Charlotte, NC adds.
Here are the facts that prove having friends is ridiculously
healthy.
Middle children are great mediators
Most middle children are peacekeepers. Since they are
sandwiched between other siblings, they are often
obsessed with fairness and balance. GinaMarie Guarino,
a Licensed Mental Health Counselor Family Therapist,
says that middle children also tend to manage conflict
between siblings as well. “A middle child will hold a special
relationship with each sibling, which helps him or her be
Middle children are wonderful negotiators
When middle children aren’t mediating family fights, they
are making solid points for their own agendas. Thanks to
good listening skills and patience, they know how to grab
their parents’ attention—and negotiate for what they want.
Or, as Frank Sulloway, Ph.D. puts it, “Middle-borns are the
most willing to wheel and deal.”
Middle children are easygoing
Being good mediators also helps middles compromise—
meaning they are more likely to go with the flow rather than
act stubborn of contentious, Guarino says. Plus, some
parents may have more relaxed parenting styles by the
time the second kid comes around.
Middle children are more independent
Since middles tend to form healthy relationships outside
the home, they also tend to fuse less with their parents.
“They are neither overcompensating in terms of taking on
family responsibilities like the oldest sibling nor depending
on others like the youngest,” says Katie Davis, PsyD.
Although it may seem like siblings compete for their
parents’ attention and “fusion,” middles who are less fused
actually grow up to be healthier, better-adjusted adults,
Davis says. “They benefit from the emotional distance they
need to differentiate themselves as individuals,” she adds.
 Middle children have strong 12 Definitive Traits Middle children are self-motivated
friendships and relationships
of a Middle Child

A middle child tends to The independence that drives

prioritize relationships middle children also makes
outside of the family unit, them self-motivated.
according to Lisa Lewis, MD. Schumann says middles are
Middle children are wonderful
“Middle children, probably used to working hard for their
negotiators
because they feel accomplishments—as well as
overlooked, will have a recognition from their
tendency to create stronger parents. These hard-working
friendships and long-term justice seekers fight for what
relationships,” they want in life. Try these
smart ways to stop sibling
rivalry before it starts.
Thanks to good listening skills
and patience, they know how
to grab their parents’
attention—and negotiate for
what they want.