THE BEAUTIES

BY DAWN RENEE JONES

© AUGUST 30, 2017

dawnrenee.jones@gmail.com
612-275-4736
rev.3.1.18

1

THE WORLD OF THE PLAY
Gods and Goddesses live in a reality where time and space are what they deem them to be.
They have fluid access to items, language and cultural references that transcend linear
earth-bound naturalism.

The playing space is highly mutable and adaptable. Locations and objects show up when
needed and vanish when not. Projections of the cosmos create mood and environments. The
Goddess Venus parts the clouds to observe folk, as though peering through Venetian blinds.

CHARACTERS: All culturally and racially ambiguous. No blondes.

VENUS A neurotic and aging Goddess of Beauty with an anxiety disorder. (Inspired
by Janice Dickerson, former super model.)

EROS A demi-god, lives for pleasure, the progenitor of erotica; he is sensual not
just sexual. He is the much indulged and somewhat sheltered only child of
Venus. He is gorgeous, joyous, innocent, vain. (Inspired by the artist
Prince.)

PSYCHE An innocent maiden; gentle, very chill as in Zen. Players must resist the
temptation to make her simple-minded in her passive simplicity.

AAZEEN Psyche’s twin sister: protective, aggressive, sword wielding, distrustful.

CITIZENS A cross-cultural/ethnically ambiguous cast of thousands: no fewer than 8

and as many as 12, playing multiple characters including: ADVANCERS,
CITIZENS, PROD TECHS, PAPARAZZI, CLERIC, SCAVENGERS,
DONNA AND REX REED, as well as --

NEWSCASTERS Quasi-network news and Entertainment Tonight

anchors, heralding the importance of celebrity life.

SEASON’S BEAUTY A bubble-gum pop idol

ADONIS A buff country music singer

BUZZ BLANKETS are the sound of Citizens repeating language under primary dialogue
and are never spoken in unison.

A slash / indicates the next line of dialogue overlaps with the line being spoken.

2

 ACT I

SCENE ONE An ADVANCE TEAM in coveralls and rubber boots enters through
the house, carrying tool boxes, buckets, push brooms, etc, prepares
the space for an imminent arrival. Some take measurements: the
distance between the edge and various points on stage; others
sweep, feather dust the air, Swiffer aisles and under audience seats.

ADVANCERS 1
Excuse me, excuse us please. / Sorry, sorry to bother.

ADVANCER 2
Let’s clear the area.

ADVANCER 1
Sorry to bother, sorry to bother. / Thank you, thank you. Pardon me. Pardon me. Pardon me.

Stairs covered in flowers are rolled in and are sprayed with ornate
atomizers. The stair-prep team keeps moving the stairs in search of
the optimal light.

ADVANCER 2
You’ll want to pull your arms in when the time comes, as close to you as you can.
Paparazzi. They’ll take ‘em off, clean. I’ve seen them do it. (slicing motion) Arm, leg, a
foot, even a head. Gone. I’ll try to stir them away from you, if I can.

ADVANCER 1
He’s a paparazzi matador.

ADVANCERS 1 & 2
Paparazzi matador! Olè!

ADVANCER 2
That whole section. / Has to go.

ADVANCER 1
They look so comfortable. Are you comfortable? You and your friend? See. Be a shame to
move ‘em. All shaved and scrubbed, pits and privates and all. Tickets paid for. Nicely
dressed. Lovely what you’re wearing. Did you rent a sitter? Not even for the dog? Oh.

More Advancers enter with huge feathered fans, practice fan

3

 choreography. TECHIES walk backwards, unspooling cable
attached to the microphones of two NEWCASTERS.

NEWSCASTER 1
Can’t you just feel the excitement, Bob?

NEWSCASTER 2
Absolutely, Chris.

NEWSCASTER 1
Did you see the tailgaters out there?

NEWSCAST 2
In the parking lot? Yes, I did, Paully.

NEWSCASTER 1
Some of them have been out there for days.

NEWSCASTER 2
What an incredible turn out, Rick.

A floral horseshoe rolls in, a velvet rope on stanchions. Advancers

practice walking through the velvet rope.

NEWSCASTER 1
You know this event will reach more than 367 trillion signals across the galaxy.

VENDOR A1 NEWSCASTER 2
Shiny pretties. Shiny pretties. / Get your This Season’s Beauty has shown phenomenal
shiny pretties. Shiny pretty lotions, poise in her meteoric rise.
potions…

NEWSCASTER 1
Yes, she has Stan.

NEWSCASTER 2
You know it wasn’t that long ago that she first charmed her way into our hearts as the
precocious little sister to the Stud Muffins.

1 Buzz Blanket: vendors repeat lines under Newscaster.

4

NEWSCASTER 1
Oh Scott, was she just the cutest thing?

VENDOR B
The cutest, the cutest. / Everything you need to be the cutest. Cuteness, get your cutenesses.

NEWSCASTER 2
The thing she did with / the curl.

NEWSCASTER 1
(laughing) The one curl.

NEWSCASTER 2
Always dangling right there and

NEWSCASTER 1 & 2
The blow.

They blow imaginary bangs out of their eyes.

NEWSCASTER 1
She was amazing.

NEWSCASTER 2
Even at an early age. How old was she then?

NEWSCASTER1
She was seven when she started and twelve when the Stud Muffins ended.

NEWSCASTER 2
She had the brightest smile.

NEWSCASTER 1
Even her pout was cute. Her upper vermillion looks almost hand drawn.

NEWSCASTER 2
The perfect Cupid’s bow.

NEWSCASTER 1
That’ll be something to watch in the years ahead.

5

NEWSCASTER 2
Really?

NEWSCASTER 1
(Catty) Well on a serious note the philtum ridge, the soft tissue just above the vermillion
border, it has been known to striate when the Cupid’s bow is strongly pronounced.

NEWSCASTER 2
That’s why they created fillers.

NEWSCASTER 1
Well the thing with fillers over time is they can over-inflate the orbicularis oris and when
that happens, puckering, using a straw, even whispering can be a tremendous challenge.

NEWSCASTER 2
What about blowing?

NEWSCASTER 1
Exactly.

NEWSCASTER 2
She’s got to do the blow. She’s known for her blow. The blow then the look. (They mimic
the blow and the look.)

NEWSCASTER 1
(Touching ear piece) I’ve just gotten word that, just a second, I think, yes, yes, she’s just
entered the building.

NEWSCASTER 2
And here we go. What a ramp up. Season’s Beauty has / arrived and…

NEWSCASTER 1
We’re going to video? Now?

NEWSCASTER 2
Looks like we’re going with the clip first.

NEWSCASTER 1
How exciting.

6

NEWSCASTER 2
This is really exciting. The world premiere of Season’s Beauty’s / new video

Lights down, video up: camera follows SEASON’S BEAUTY

through a maze of billowing gauze.

VIDEO VO/WOMAN
I see …you
You see …me
I see we
Are beautiful

VIDEO VO/MALE
(whispered repeatedly)
Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful…

VIDEO VO/WOMAN
See the miracle of your …beauty
reflected in me
The miracle of your beauty is shining
And free

VIDEO VO/MALE
Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful…

VIDEO VO/MAN
(whispered repeatedly)
Beauty, beauty, beauty, beauty

VIDEO VO/WOMAN
The wonder of we
The miracle of beauty
That is you, that is me
Believe your beauty
Your beauty is
all we see
Beautiful you and me

VIDEO VO/MALE
She dreams in miracles.

VIDEO VO/WOMAN
I see the miracle of beauty.
The beauty of we.

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 Close up: she blows lock of hair out of her eyes, smiles seductively
at camera. Title up: MIRACLE BEAUTY. Video out, lights up.

NEWSCASTERS 1
Stunning.

NEWSCASTER 2
Yes, breath-taking.

NEWSCASTER 1
Were you getting a little choked up there towards the end?

NEWSCASTER 2
Maybe a little. (hand to ear piece) Yes? All right, they’re telling us we’re / moments away
from an entrance.

ALL ADVANCERS
(Buzz blanket)
She’s coming. She’s coming. She’s coming. /She’s coming. She’s coming. She’s coming.

Advancer team roll out a red carpet, sprinkle flower petals along
the path.

NEWSCASTER 1
Here she comes, ladies and gentleman, here she comes. / Season’s Beauty, the most
beautiful woman in the World. Today.

NEWSCASTER 2
The Most Beautiful Woman in the World. Today.

Swarming paparazzi back onto stage, followed by SEASON’S

BEAUTY, in pink bows, moving in slow motion, blinded by camera
flashes. Handlers help her ascend the stairs, a sign lowers over her
head. MIRACLE BEAUTY. Flowers and confetti rain down, a
symphony plays. Bodyguards stand at the bottom of stairs. She hits
her mark atop the stairs, freezes, the room goes dark, except for a
spotlight on her.

NEWSCASTER 1
Oh my, / look at her.

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NEWSCASTER 2
What an achievement.

Advancers swoon, wipe away tears of joy, hug each other.

SEASON’S BEAUTY
(softly)
Venus?

NEWSCASTER 1
She’s opening with an acknowledgement to Venus.

NEWSCASTER 2
Smart move.
Beauty looks dazed. Down stage EROS motions for her to smile and
continue. She touches her ear bud.

SEASON’S BEAUTY
Venus?

The upper 1/3 of the horizon tears open: VENUS, larger than life
skypes in. She stuffs marshmallows in her mouth as she speaks.

VENUS
(irritable)
Yes! What?! Oh for crying out loud. Thank them.

SEASON’S BEAUTY
Thank them. Thank you.

VENUS
All of them.

SEASON’S BEAUTY
Thank you all.

VENUS
What are you thanking them for?

SEASON’S BEAUTY & VENUS

Thank you all for touching my life, for sharing their love, your love with me. Especially the
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fans who’ve been with me since my Stud Muffin days.

A FAN
We love you Little Muffin.

SEASON’S BEAUTY
And Little Muffin loves you too.

VENUS
Value statement.

SEASON’S BEAUTY
Your love means so much to me. You are the battery that keeps me going. (Hair blow) I’m
so grateful for your invaluable kindness. Thank you all for the Teddy Bears and tweets. You
guys mean everything to me.

Crowd roars. She pauses as though she’s runs out of charge.

VENUS
This means / so much to you

SEASON’S BEAUTY
This means so much to you.

VENUS
To me!

SEASON’S BEAUTY
To Venus, uh, to me. My heart belongs to you, the fans, and I feel your hearts whenever
we’re together, and I want you to know that I wrote these songs from my real feelings, that I
have, sometimes. All my songs are like what we all feel sometimes. We are truly beautiful
when we share our feelings, we make the world a better place. And that’s the miracle of
beauty.

VENUS
Enough. (beat) Ask for the contract.

SEASON’S BEAUTY
Do you love me? And I love you. Hearts united! (She throws up a fist. Crowds roar.) Are
we living our miracles? Today and every day. I love you. I know you love me.

10

 Crowd roars, brass fanfare. Satisfied that things are back on track,
Venus removes earphones and disconnects. Vendors move through
crowd selling merchandise.

VENDOR ONE2
Miracle of Beauty. / Miracle Beauty.

VENDOR TWO
The Miracle of Beauty: in jars, / tubes or spray. Eye lashes.

VENDOR ONE
Miracle Beauty gloss, floss, blushes, apps. Beat the rush: get your miracle Beauty today for
a thousand beautiful tomorrows.

Handlers help Season’s Beauty down stairs, she signs autographs,

poses for selfies. Season’s Beauty, paparazzi and crowd exit,
Advancers push broom debris. EROS pays workers.

VEELA is rolled in on a high stool. Her hands are loosely bound by

a delicate scarf, her eyes blindfolded by same. Eros stands behind
her, kisses the nape of her neck.

EROS
What do you feel?

VEELA
You.

EROS
You feel my what?

VEELA
I feel your lips.

EROS
That was then. What do you feel now?

VEELA
I feel your…breath.

EROS
Yes.

2 Buzz Blanket Vendors

11

VEELA
I feel your breathing, on my skin.

EROS
Where would you like to feel me?

VEELA
All over.

EROS
If I were to put my mouth…

VEELA
Yes.

EROS
…very close to your…mouth …

VEELA
Yes.

EROS
And parted your lips with … my tongue. What would I taste?

VEELA
My thirst, for you. Oh Eros, take me, stir me in your caldron of pleasure.

He removes her blindfold, unfastens his shirt. She puts her legs
around his waist.
VENUS
(off stage)
Roas! Roas!!

Eros and Veela continue making out. VENUS storms in.

VENUS
Out! Out, out, out or I turn you into a sea urchin.

Veela runs off, Eros motions “call me later,” blows her a kiss.

EROS
I love her.

VENUS
No you do not.

12

EROS
Really, I do. I love her.

VENUS
You love the feeling.

EROS
Love the feeling, love the girl. I love the feelings she arouses.

VENUS
You are a self-arouser.

EROS
That’s what makes me the greatest lover, ever.

VENUS
All you young gods think you’re the greatest lover.

EROS
I am.

VENUS
I am not happy, I am not happy. I am. Not. Happy. With the muffin girl.

EROS
No? She’s cute.

VENUS
Cute? Cute?! Cuteness does not sustain. It has no gravitas.

EROS
Oh I don’t know, she could be stunning in time, / with your guidance for a few
seasons.

VENUS
Impossible. I am so disappointed.

EROS
Don’t be. The young and the plain like her. She’s very sweet.

VENUS
Sweet rots teeth. What’s wrong with your hair? (touches it) It’s dry!

EROS
Really?

13

VENUS
Why are you disintegrating? Why is beauty under siege?

EROS
Beauty is not / under siege, you’re not under seige

VENUS
Yes it is. Mediocrity is advancing, hurling us toward the cataclysmic.

EROS
I’ve heard of no such nonsense.

VENUS
How can you hear anything over the cacophony of utilitarian encroachment? Foulness is
gaining traction on ugly tongues, ugly tongues, ugly, ugly, ugly tongues. Rude writing on
bodies. Vulgarity overtaking mystery. Life without beauty and the senses atrophy.
Civilizations perish. (She looks at her hands, touches her face.) Beauty is fading.

EROS
Never. Beauty is the revelation of the divine and the divine is eternal.

VENUS
Who told you that?

EROS
You did.

VENUS
I know.

EROS
You are the Goddess of Beauty, created by the ultimate source. Your regency reigns
supreme. You have imbued the universe with your essence. The flowers owe their all to
you.

VENUS
Flowers die.

EROS
The birds …

VENUS
Birds poop.

EROS
But you taught them to sing. As do rivulets and streams, all tinkling waters sing your praise.

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Trees would be naked poles without your loving attention to every leaf. And what you did
with the stars. Tell me again how you hung the stars.

VENUS
I didn’t hang them, Zeus had already thrown them up there.

EROS
But you set them.

VENUS
That Muse girl, the cross-eyed one, Urania. A great mind but no aesthetic. She stacked them
in columns on a grid. Who would fall in love under blinking plaid? No one. So I / petitioned
Zeus and he endorsed my vision. I spread them out, gave them levels, perspective and the
rest, as they say, is eternity. No one has my touch.

EROS
Petitioned Zeus, ‘atta girl. Only you.

VENUS
The Muse sisters might “inspire” some random so-called creative expression but art without
me…

EROS
Art without beauty.

EROS & VENUS

Is fa-kak-a-la.

EROS
Pooie. Fa-kak-ka-la!

VENUS
Beauty makes the heart leap.

EROS
Bathes the beholder in bliss.

VENUS
Beauty is pleasurable. Comfort nests in pleasure. Comfort makes the creatures feel safe.
Reality spins so much smoother when creatures feel safe. That is our work. Our great work.

EROS
I need to talk to you about my / work.

VENUS
To keep the universe flush with beauty. I’m thinking of starting an academy. Where we
could teach the Venutian arts.
15

EROS
No we?

VENUS
You’ll teach grooming.

EROS
Mother, we need to talk.

VENUS
Don’t call me that.

EROS
Venus we need / to…

VENUS
Goddess.

EROS
Dearest Goddess, Your Grace, Miss Mommy Mam, we need to talk.

VENUS
We are talking.

EROS
I’ve been thinking…

VENUS
That is not your strong suit.

EROS
I need something, of my own.

VENUS
Like what?

EROS
An enterprise.

VENUS
What enterprise?

EROS
A small boutique.

VENUS
You want to be a merchant?
16

EROS
A boutique … agency.

VENUS
To compete with me?

EROS
Who would be so foolish as to compete with you? I was thinking more like a really
narrowly focused niche …

VENUS
You don’t have the discipline for enterprise. All you ever want to do is roll around in the
clouds, face buried in a plump bosom, a perfumed thigh around your neck, or her sister’s
thigh or their mother’s. What niche? What is your brand?

EROS
Lesser beauties.

VENUS
Who wants lesser beauties?

EROS
Lesser beauties are fine in clumps, seen from a distance. Cheerleaders, infomercials, roller
derbies, rallies, extras. I would continue to bring the quality beauties to you.

VENUS
Do they exist?

EROS
Yes they do.

VENUS
Why have I not seen any? / Why have you not delivered said beauties?

EROS
You have. I will, I will. (A beat. Then pouting…) The other gods, they don’t respect me.

VENUS
Who? What other gods?

17

EROS
They all of them have something of their own. (Whiny) Pan’s got the pipe ensemble. Helios
has the tanning business. Nemesis does contract hits. Thanatos and his funerals. Everyone
has their own domain.

VENUS
You have domain.

EROS
I work for my mother.

VENUS
Don’t be silly. They wish they could spend their lives as you do. (beat) Don’t pout, don’t do
that to you beautiful face. All right. I’ll grant you your sovereignty.

EROS
Really? Thank you, mommy. (He rushes to embrace her.)

VENUS
Under one condition. You will deliver to me one superior beauty. An arresting beauty, a
true blessing to the eyes, with a flowering heart and natural grace, and a voice that elevates
the spirit. I can teach her the rest. Can you do that for me?

EROS
Yes, I will, gladly.

VENUS
All right, go, you have my permission to start your little boutiques of less-than beauties.

EROS
Lesser not less than. There’s a difference.

Venus reaches up and a quiver of arrows appears.

VENUS
Take these arrows with you.

EROS
Aw come on, Ma, you know I’m a lover not a fighter.

18

VENUS
These are arrows of love. They will transform ire into adoration should villainy in any form
come your way. Do not waste them on lustful folly.

EROS
I won’t. (He takes the pouch of arrows and kneels before her.) Thank you, my goddess.

VENUS
Go and be safe, my beautiful boy. I will hold my breath until you return.

They embrace, he dashes off.

VENUS
Zephyr. Zephyr!

ZEPHYR, a sheet of gossamer, blows in. Venus catches it mid-air.

Dearest friend of the etheric realm, grant me the favor of your allegiance and keep my child,
my naïve, sweet Eros, always and forever within your sight. Follow and protect him. Create
a vortex of solace around him. Shield him from malice and misfortune. Obliterate all
intended to harm him. Direct the sails of his journey through peaceful waters and carefree
days. And bring to me, most trusted colleague, uncensored information about his every
move.

Xephyr flies out of Venus’s hands.

SCENE TWO Starry night over calm waters. Eros sleeps on a sail boat stirred by
a BOATMAN. Eros is joined in slumber by TWO WOMEN and
MAN in luxurious bed on the boat’s deck, their bodies entwined.
A SOPRANO singing3 faintly in the distance awakens Eros, he sits
up to listen. The voice stops, he lays down, the voice returns, he sits
up again. One woman awakes, strokes Eros.
WOMAN
I want some more.

EROS
Yes.

3 Chi il bel Sogno di Doretta from “La Rondine” by Puccinni

19

WOMAN
Yummy yummy yum. You taste so good.

The man and 2nd woman awaken. An orgy ensues. The soprano’s
voice is heard again. Eros sits up then stands.

WOMAN
Don’t go.

EROS
Shhhhh.
Eros approaches the BOATMAN.

EROS
Do you hear that? What is it?

BOATMAN
Enticement.

EROS
Where is it coming from?

BOATMAN
Beyond the beyond.

EROS
What’s out there?

BOATMAN
A sprinkling of islands, mostly deserted.

EROS
That voice?

BOATMAN
Probably coming from the Isle of Butterfly Moons.

EROS
You’ve been there? Know anyone that has? Aren’t you curious?

20

BOATMAN
Never trust a siren’s song.

EROS
Can you take me there?

BOATMAN
I can get you close, you’ll have to wade in.

EROS
There’s no dock or port?

BOATMAN
No. You still want to go?

EROS
Yes. How long will it take?

BOATMAN
I can get you there by daylight.

EROS
Yes. Take me there.
Boat and passengers sail off.

SCENE THREE Morning. Isle of the Butterfly Moon. Ocean sounds, bird calls. Eros
comes over the top of a sand dune then descends, drops his bags,
closes eyes, inhales deeply. He hears the soprano in the distance,
follows the sound stage right but it changes direction and he seeks it
stage left. AAZEEN ascends the dune wielding a sword; a cloth
mask hides half of her face. She charges, toward Eros.

AAZEEN
Ah ha!

EROS
Ah ha. (Takes a step toward her.)

AAZEEN
Stop right there.

He smiles seductively, opens arms to greet her. She circles him,

21

 waving her weapon about him. Sizing him up, she makes threatening
lunges at him, he is amused and does not move.

EROS
I am defenseless.

AAZEEN
Who are you?

EROS
Eros of Venutia.

He bows deeply, smiles.

AAZEEN
Your purpose?!

EROS
Pleasure.

AAZEEN
Whose pleasure?

EROS
(seductively)
Depends.

Fancy flourishes with her sword, intended to intimidate.

EROS
Oh no, I am a lover not a fighter, mama.

AAZEEN
Pirate, prince or paparazzi?!

EROS
….

AAZEEN
Trifle with me and there will be consequences.

EROS
Consequences require contact.

AAZEEN
22

What are your intentions?

EROS
Yo soy tourista, mama. I’m just here for the sights and the sight of you makes me forget to
do all the ordinary things that one is meant to do, for you are a joy to behold.

AAZEEN
And you are a blind man and a liar.

EROS
Neither blind, deaf nor numb to the scent of jasmine rising from your décolletage. I envy
the threads of your bodice that know your warmth and rise and fall with your breath. The
magnificence of your presence has smitten me foolish.

AAZEEN
I suspect you were a fool long before you reached these shores.

EROS
To be the hilt of your sword, held firmly in your grasp, in the authority of your soft and
capable hands.

AAZEEN
Stop talking.

EROS
I’m just sayin’.

AAZEEN
Where are your things? Your gear, your ropes? Scaling spikes? You don’t fool me, I know
why you’re here. Is that your bag?

EROS
Yes.

AAZEEN
What’s in it?

EROS
Tops and bottoms, toys, lubricants and gels…

AAZEEN
Dump it!
He does. With the tip of her sword trained on him she snatches the
quiver from the pile, shakes arrows out.

EROS
23

Be careful, with those, be careful, they’re very ...

AAZEEN
A ha!!! What are these?

EROS
Arrows.

AAZEEN
You have a permit for them?

EROS
I didn’t know I needed one.

She whistles. Two CITIZENS appear, she motions toward the

arrows, they pick them up quickly. Eros rushes toward them, she
blocks him with her sword.

EROS
No no, let me do that, please let me. Careful, those tips are rare and very sharp.

AAZEEN
Ah ha! You’ve come to harm us?

EROS
Not at all.

AAZEEN
Why do you have weapons in your bag?

EROS
Well actually I did not put the arrows in my bag.

AAZEEN
Did you at anytime in your travels lose sight of your luggage or accept a package from a
stranger?

EROS
No.

AAZEEN
How did the weaponry come to be in your possession?

EROS
My mother.

24

AAZEEN
Your mother?

EROS
She’s very protective. Is not yours?

AAZEEN
I protect myself. (The soprano’s song). Shut up.

EROS
You know this voice?

AAZEEN
On your knees.

Amused, he complies.

EROS
Here we go. (Unafraid and excited by the adventure.) Are you going to tie me up?

A loud alarm sounds.

CITIZENS
(OS)
Breach! Breach! Breach!!

Citizens run in.

CITIZEN TWO
A breach!

CITIZEN THREE
There’s been a breach, my lady. Two men were seen crossing the north field.

AAZEEN
I have this one.

EROS
Not me, this is as far I got then you found me. I waded in, see I’m still wet.

In the distance voices yell “Monster!” More Citizens rush in.

CITIZEN FOUR
It’s the monster! He’s here! He’s here. The monster is here!

Citizens scurry in panic, shadow box, tumble the dunes like ninjas.

25

CITIZEN FIVE
She’s gone! She’s gone! The Little Venus is gone.

EROS
Little Venus?

AAZEEN
(Dashes to leave then hesitates, turns to Eros) Consider yourself spared, Eros of Venutia or
whoever you are. Flee this island at once if you know what’s good for you.

EROS
Not without a quiver. Noun and verb.

She makes threatening moves toward him with her sword, he feigns
fear. More alarms ring. She exits.

EROS
Oh sweet maiden, dear lady, hot mama, oh how I am drawn to your incendiary core.
Such smoldering complexity. (His AIDES appear and dress him in ruffle-fronted finery as
he speaks.)
Should winter come
I pray you let me huddle close
to your flame, where we might
multiply the heat.
I’d like a little more of her blaze.
I am turned on by her gaze: Obsidian eyes, black and shining, with flickering streaks of
gold. Breasts like blooming hydrangeas, full, delicate, round.
I like a woman in charge of her weapon and herself.
She ambulates and the air quakes with gratitude in her wake.
She raises her sword and her torso spirals to unfurl like an opening fan.
Let our sword play be merry foreplay
‘cause I have got to, got to, got to have a taste
of her juicy blade.

Changed and sworded–up, he strikes off to pursue Aazeen.

SCENE FOUR Aazeen & Psyche’s Garden. Deafening alarms sound. Citizens run
about in chaos.

CITIZENS & AAZEEN

(OS)
Psyche! Psyche! Psyche!

AAZEEEN
26

(OS)
Koo-doo-goo!

Aazeen and citizens enter garden.

AAZEEN
Block all the roads! Secure the gates. How did this happen?

CITIZEN ONE
She was here and then she wasn’t.

AAZEEN
What does that mean?

CITIZEN ONE
She was feeding to the butterflies and then and then and then…

AAZEEN
She did not evaporate.

CITIZEN ONE
It’s the monster. He’s finally come. He’s taken her.

CITIZEN THREE
The old gardener heard him.

AAZEEN
Where?

CITIZEN TWO
Behind the root shed. The poor old man was so frightened that he locked himself in and hid
under a bench until he heard us calling.

AAZEEN
He saw the monster?

CITIZEN TWO
No but he heard him.

CITIZEN FIVE enters with hacksaw and a bundle of men’s clothing.

CITIZEN FIVE
We found these under a bush near the goat field.

CITIZEN ONE
Oh, he’s eaten the shepherds right out of their clothes.

27

CITIZENS
Yikes!
Citizens scatter in fear.

AAZEEN
Wait! Wait!

CITIZEN ONE
(fleeing)
We’ll keep looking.

AAZEEN
Please. Psyche!

Citizens dash off. She enters her double doors to her house.

AAZEEN
Sister! Sister, are you here?

Eros has come a courting, with a lush floral bouquet and a heart
shaped box of chocolates. He strikes a pose. Aazeen returns.

AAZEEN
You?!
He throws her the bouquet, she catches it and throws it down.

AAZEEN
I warned you. (She advances with her sword.)

EROS
You did!

They fence, closely matched until Eros displays his advantage but
does not conquer. Fight resumes. She steps up her game noticeably.

EROS
Oh, your parry! Lovely, good for you, excellent follow-through.

Eros allows her to dominate to a point then pushes back, gently,

playfully but with a firm lead. He is entertained, she is furious.

EROS
If I didn’t know better I’d think you were seriously trying to hurt me.

AAZEEN
I am. And I will.

28

EROS
Hurt me bad. Make me beg for mercy.

AAZEEN
No mercy. I will show you no mercy.

EROS
Why are we fighting?

AAZEEN
Why are you here?

EROS
I’ve come to play with you.

AAZEEN
This is not play.

She makes a flurry of aggressive moves.

EROS
(French) Comment formidable. What about the booty?

AAZEEN
I beg your pardon.

EROS
The booty. The swag, the spoils, the victor’s purse for this tender engagement.

AAZEEN
This is no engagement!

EROS
Yes we are. We just have to agree on the prize.

AAZEEN
Your prize is your life.

EROS
And you, what are you fighting for?

AAZEEN
To rid this island of you.

EROS
Oh come on, be honest: when was the last time you had this much fun? You don’t want me
gone, oh no, cause you’ve never ever ever had another brother like me.
29

AAZEEN
You are not my brother!

EROS
No, I don’t want to be.

AAZEEN
You will meet my dungeon.

A flurry of elegant sword-play. Eros wins the round, politely.

EROS
I will gladly surrender myself into the brine of the defeated should the victory be yours.

AAZEEN
You shall be skewered.

EROS
Promise you’ll look me in the eyes as you do it, until my final breath, let your face be the
last I see and I will gladly go to heaven on account of thee.

AAZEEN
To Hades you’ll go!

EROS
And if I win, I get my arrows back and your mask.

AAZEEN
Never.

EROS
How’s that shoulder? Looks like you’re compensating a bit, to balance the weight in your
weaponed hand. Feeling a pinch, maybe? I can take care of that. Rub it out and …

She advances, het gets the sword away from her. She grabs her
mask with both hands and backs away from him in terror. He steps
away from her, bows gallantly.

EROS
I will not take what you do not want me to have.

He sheathes his sword, holds on to hers. Opens the box of

chocolates, offers it to her, she refuses.
EROS
May I have my arrows please?

30

AAZEEN
No.
Amused, he sits and eats chocolates.

EROS
What must I do to regain my property?

AAZEEN
Tell me the truth.

EROS
I’ve not lied to you once.

AAZEEN
Why are you here? Why have you come to this place?

EROS
Well, I’m embarrassed to say. (Licking fingers.) My mother sent me.

AAZEEN
Why?

EROS
She, we, have a small family business. We’re beauty suppliers, we place beauty where
needed.

AAZEEN
Your services are not needed here. We have our own beauty.

EROS
The little Venus?

AAZEEN
You’ve heard her song and of her plight and / and now you’re here to save her.

EROS
Ah, that voice, that once heard must be found. Why does she need saving? Is she as
beautiful as she sounds?

AAZEEN
..

EROS
So beautiful as to be compared to Venus?

31

AAZEEN
..

EROS
And who, precious essence, are you?

AAZEEN
Who am I?

EROS
Yes, please allow me to know your name. It’s only fair, you promised to show me your
face.

AAZEEN
That I never promised.

EROS
That was the contract. If you win I die, if I win you show me your face. And return my
arrows. After all we’ve been through, it’s only fair that I know your name. And I thought
you were a woman of honor.

Beat.

AAZEEN
(barely audible)
Calla Aazeen.

EROS
I’m sorry, what was that?

AAZEEN
Aazeen. Calla Aazeen.

EROS
Calla Aazeen. Calla Aazeen. Calla Aazeen. I like the way that feels in my mouth. Calla
Aazeen. Who taught you the swords? You’re very good.

AAZEEN
My father.

EROS
I look forward to congratulating him / for his …

AAZEEN
He’s dead.

32

EROS
My condolences. (beat) You sparred with your brothers?

AAZEEN
No brothers. I am my father’s son.

EROS
Sisters?

AAZEEN
One.

EROS
Older or younger?

AAZEEN
Younger, by minutes.

EROS
Twins. Is the voice, the little Venus, your sister? (No response.) And you are as beautiful as
she? My my my …

AAZEEN
Beauty is a curse.

EROS
Oh no, beauty is a blessing. Are you identical twins or fraternal.

AAZEEN
Is this an interrogation?

EROS
I want to know you, what interests you, what stokes your appetites, what slakes your thirst.
Chocolate? (No response from her.)

EROS
A father’s pride. Indeed. He taught you to hunt?

AAZEEN
Yes.

EROS
Sail?

AAZEEN
Like a captain.

33

EROS
Swim?

AAZEEN
Like an eel

EROS
You ride?

AAZEEN
And shoe it if necessary.

EROS
No.

AAZEEN
Yes.

EROS
Let’s do it. Let’s grab some steads and ride straight up a mountain’s face, to maybe a
waterfall or a lake where we might refresh our sweating bodies, and I can wade into the
depth of your mysteries and bring you to the brink of bliss.

AAZEEN
Is this what your father taught you? To disarm with flattery? To persist in rude and
relentless seduction?

EROS
You find me seductive?

AAZEEN
This is what the patriarchs made of you?

EROS
I don’t really have a relationship with my patriarchs. I am pretty much the product of my
mother.

AAZEEN
And she taught you?

EROS
To worship women. To elevate and exalt them. To please them whenever possible.

AAZEEN
And exploit them.

34

EROS
Never.

AAZEEN
How do the beauties you “place” feel about that?

EROS
They feel loved.

AAZEEN
Ha!

EROS
Let me explain. Beauty arouses desire. Desire chases pleasure. Pleasure righteously served
pursues the acquisition of more pleasure. Pleasure inspires gratitude, encourages affection,
attachment, that blossoms into love. That’s the cycle. Beauty. Desire. Pleasure. Love.
Strategically placed for optimal exposure our beauties both ignite and are the recipients of
vast magnitudes of love, oceans of esteem that grant them tremendous privilege.

AAAZEEN
It is no privilege to be objectified, codified and scrutinized for the sport of it. To be envied
in no small measure.

EROS
What does it feel like not to be seen?

AAZEEN
I’ve seen, and you have taken up enough of my time. I must find my sister.

EROS
Let’s do it.

AAZEEN
No, you go! Leave!

EROS
Nah, I’ll wait here for you, rub out that shoulder / for you. I brought some oils…

AAZEEN
Puh-llleasse. Go-o-o-ooo.

He gives Aazeen her sword. She takes it. He sits, eats chocolates.
She leaves. A moment passes, the rattle of cottonwood leaves
dancing in the breeze. Enter PSYCHE, engulfed in a cloud of
butterflies. Eros is taken by her.

PSYCHE
35

Hello. (He is speechless.) Are you here to rescue me?

EROS
Are you in need of rescue?

PSYCHE
No. Not a good idea. My sister. (cut-throat gesture)

She sits on a garden bench. He stands.

EROS
Aazeen is your sister?

PSYCHE
Yes.

EROS
Has she always been so / passionate?

PSYCHE
Spirited.

EROS
For sure.

PSYCHE
First born’s always eager, they say.

EROS
How much older?

PSYCHE
Minutes. Are you a monster?

EROS
Do I look like a monster?

PSYCHE
I’m not sure.

EROS
I assure you monsters wish they could look like me.

PSYCHE
You’ve seen monsters?
EROS
Yes.

36

PSYCHE
You know monsters?

EROS
Not personally.

PSYCHE
Oh.

EROS
I’ve seen one or two.

PSYCHE
Really? Please tell me, what are the like?

EROS
Well they’re different kinds of monsters, with levels and degrees of monstrosity. Like
Cyclops. Massive, one-eyed creatures. Technically the Cyclops brothers are not really
monsters just ill-tempered giants.

PSYCHE
Oh.

EROS
Cerebus, the three headed-hound, with serpents for his tails, now he’s a monster.

PSYCHE
Is he married?

EROS
I doubt it.

PSYCHE
No?

EROS
He has a very intense vocation. He guards the gates of Hades to make sure no one escapes.

PSYCHE
Does he ever leave Hades? Go after runaways that may escape?

EROS
No one has ever escaped Hades, never will. With three heads looking in all directions at
once, they’ll never get past Cerebus.
PSYCHE
You know others, monsters?

37

EROS
The three-headed Hydra.

PSYCHE
Do all monsters have three heads?

EROS
Not always. Hydra and Cerebus are siblings, so in their case three-headedness is a family
trait.

PSYCHE
From three-headed parents?

EROS
No. Echidne4 and Typhon were the progenitors of a brood of leviathans of variously
nefarious aptitudes for destruction. Echidne was once a great horror in her own right but her
thirst for flesh waned after Typhon’s demise. Typhon. He was the grandmaster of all
monsters: a man’s body and where there should have been legs vipers grow from his hip
sockets. His fingers are small dragonheads that rip everything within reach. But Zeus took
him out. One hundred thunderbolts to his head. The meanest monster of all time was
stunned and dazed long enough for Zeus to bury him alive, in a tomb under the Underworld.
When earth quakes and oceans heave, that’s Typhon trying to free himself. But he’ll never
get out. Nothing gets past Cerebus.

PSYCHE
I will marry a monster.

EROS
No.

PSYCHE
Yes.

EROS
What monster?

PSYCHE
I don’t know him yet.

EROS
Why / would …
PSYCHE
It’s my destiny.

EROS

4 pronounced a-KID-na

38

No, destiny is what you make it. Your destiny should be one of privilege and love. You
should be regaled.

PSYCHE
Who are you?

EROS
I am Eros of Venutia, emissary of the goddess Venus who awaits your arrival.

PSYCHE
I don’t know her.

EROS
You’ll love her and she’ll love you. She sent me to find you.

PSYCHE
And you have.

EROS
So let’s go.

PSYCHE
No I can’t. I’m to be married.

EROS
To?

PSYCHE
A monster.

EROS
(imploring)
Oh, little bitty pretty one …

Enter Aazeen.
AAZEEN
Psyche!

PSYCHE
Aazeen.

AAZEEN
You’re here.
EROS PSYCHE AAZEEN
She’s here. I’m here. You, out!

EROS
39

Now wait.

PSYCHE
Please stay.

AAZEEN
No way.

PSYCHE
I like him. This is my sister, Aazeen. / Aazeen, this is Eros. Oh. Pretty, isn’t he?

AAZEEN
We’ve met.

EROS
Thank /you.

AAZEEN
Too damn pretty.

EROS
(sings) It’s a family reunion, a family reunion.5

AAZEEN
Yes, pity you have to leave. Do come back when you have less time.

PSYCHE
Oh sister.

AAZEEN
He is up to no good.

PSYCHE
He won’t steal me.

EROS
Who’s trying to steal you?

AAZEEN
A cavalcade of misdirecteds: romantics, would-be suitors and do-gooders. Adventurers.
Pirates, twice!
PSYCHE
Really sweet guys.

AAZEEN

5 “Family Reunion” by the Ojays
40

All determined to save the imperiled maiden from her “plight”.

EROS & AAZEEN & PSYCHE6

To marry a monster.

EROS
Let me help you with / this.

AAZEEN
We don’t need your help. (to Psyche) See.

EROS
I have resources.

AAZEEN
Tell him. Tell him.

PSYCHE
You are very kind to offer assistance but we have no need. Preparations have been made.
There’s nothing to be done but wait. Wait. Wait for him to find me and then we shall be
wed.

EROS
No, come with me, you won’t have to marry a monster. You’ll be safe in the protection of
the Goddess. Venus is a mighty fortress. She’ll shield you from danger and add value to
your life.

AAZEEN
Such a goniff.

PSYCHE
I choose not shielding from my destiny. Destiny has been very very good to me.

EROS
How has a monster become your destiny?

AAZEEN & PSYCHE

The Oracles.

PSYCHE
Before we were born. The Oracles foretold.
AAZEEN
Two sisters. One to marry a monster.

PSYCHE

6 Psyche says wistfully; Eros confused; Aazeen with pride.
41

The other to learn the hard way.

EROS
Learn what the hard way?

PSYCHE
We don’t know yet. (beat) I chose monster.

AAZEEN
And I the hard way.

PSYCHE
And whoa be unto any that refutes the Oracle.

AAZEEN
A neighboring family was told by the Oracle to never trim the branches from the tree that
grew behind their house. But the stubborn father ignored the Oracle and cut the whole tree
down to a stump and every child of his, one by one, lost a limb in a bizarre accident or
illness for years thereafter.

EROS
Lovely place you have here?

PSYCHE
Thank / you.

AAZEEN
May I get your hat?

PSYCHE
Let’s talk to him.

EROS
How about my arrows?

AAZEEN
Ha! No.

PSYCHE
I like him.

AAZEEN EROS
I don’t. Thank you, I like you too.
PSYCHE
Zeenie.

EROS
42

Zeenie? Zeenie Bean.

AAZEEN
Don’t call me that.

EROS
Zeenie Bean.

Eros moves toward Aazeen, she darts away from him.

PSYCHE
Shall we have wine? / Are you hungry, Eros?

AAZEEN
No.

EROS
Famished.

AAZEEN
No!

PSYCHE
Sister. Can we talk?

Psyche puts distance between herself and Eros, motions for Aazeen
to follow her, she does.

PSYCHE
I never get to have company.

AAZEEN
I don’t trust him.

PSYCHE
You don’t trust.

AAZEEN
You’re so naïve.

PSYCHE
And you’re so mean. Please, I haven’t heard a new voice with new information for a
decade.
AAZEEN
No, not that / long

PSYCHE
43

Those many years. My brain has grown sluggish from stale ideas. I want to know what he
knows.

AAZEEN
He knows nothing.

PSYCHE
He knows a Goddess. We don’t know any goddesses. Oh Zeenie, I want to hear him speak
of goddesses and monsters and wonders I’ve never imagined. Only for a while, my sister.
Please, please, please. He’s harmless and you know it.

AAZEEEN
All right.

PSYCHE
Yes?

AAZEEN
Yes.

SCENE FIVE A brass-heavy 1950s Latin orchestra plays. Citizens, in tropical

accessories, roll in hedges and topiary; they help Psyche and Eros
change to resort wear; serving them beverages in frosted glasses.
Psyche and Eros play croquet, Aazeen guards her sister. Psyche
laughs at Ero’s silliness.

EROS
Pop! Pop! No you have to make your lips do this. (He makes a pop using his lips fully)
Pop!

Psyche tries to make the sound, each attempt creates laughter.

PSYCHE
Pop! Pop!

PSYCHE
Clack. Mine goes clack.

EROS
No it doesn’t. Your ball goes…

Eros taps Psyche’s croquet ball.

PSYCHE
You hear it?

EROS
44

It went pop.

PSYCHE
Is your hearing going, old man?

EROS
What? What’s that you say? I can’t hear you. Aazeen, come play with us.

AAZEEN
I don’t play.

EROS
Oh come on. Play is the mode of the day. Someday you’ll look back on this day wish you
had. Your sister will be gone and you’ll kick yourself for not enjoying these high times.
(sings) Enjoy yourself, it’s later than you think.
Enjoy yourself while you’re still in the pink.
The years go by faster than you think so

PSYCHE & EROS

Enjoy yourself, enjoy yourself, it’s la-ter-than-you-think.

AAZEEN
All right, all right all right!

Psyche hands her a mallet, Eros hands her a ball .Citizens create a
spectator’s gallery to watch Aazeen’s shot.

EROS
Think of it as my head.

Aazeen places ball and strikes it with the mallet.

Citizens applaud politely, one citizen loses a bet to another, pays
debt to another citizen. Aazeen looks at Eros intensely, makes the
popping sound exactly as he did.

AAZEEN
And that was a proper pop.

Aazeen takes a water pistol from her pocket and blasts Eros then
Psyche. They shriek and seek cover. Citizens arm Eros with a water
pistol and Psyche with an umbrella. They chase, squirt, shriek,
evade, squirt, squeak, chase, laugh, repeat. Psyche squirts
unsuspecting Eros then Aazeen. Chase, laugh, squirt, repeat.
Days and nights pass in merriment. Citizens move huge Van Gogh-
esque suns, moons and planets across the landscape as they hum a
Viennese waltz. Eros and Psyche waltz; Aazeen and Psyche waltz.
45

 The trio lies on a grassy knoll under a magical twilight sky. Shirtless
Eros lies between the sisters. On their backs they point at the
heavens and count stars.

AAZEEN
Seven hundred ninety-six.

EROS
Seven hundred ninety-seven.

PSYCHE
Seven hundred ninety-nine.

AAZEEN & EROS

Seven hundred ninety-eight.

PSYCHE
Seven hundred ninety-nine.

AAZEEN
Eight hundred.

EROS
Eight hundred one.

PSYCHE
Eight hundred seven.

AAZEEN EROS
Eight hundred two. No!

PSYCHE
I counted that whole group.

EROS
Eight hundred seventy-seven.

PSYCHE & AAZEEN

Eight hundred seventy eight.

EROS
Good, we’re back.

PSYCHE
Nine hundred and seventy nine trillion cotillion.

46

 They laugh. Laughter quiets down, one by one they close their eyes.
The sky is a dance of galaxies and landscapes. Stillness.
Eros rolls over on his side toward Aazeen.

EROS
How’s that shoulder? How’d you like me to rub you the right way?

AAZEEN
No!
Eros rolls onto his back then rolls toward Psyche.

EROS
Psyche?

PSYCHE
Hmm?

EROS
Would you like a massage?

PSYCHE
No thank you.

Eros rolls onto his back.

EROS
Anybody want to give me a message? Pat my back?

Neither woman stirs. A celestial play of stars and comets as the trio
approaches sleep. Beat. Aazeen snores Eros sits up on his elbows,
watches Aazeen snore; is amused. He lays down, Psyche curls into
him. He is content.

EROS
Good night, sweet night, good night.

Venus observes

VENUS
He thinks he’s on sabbatical? Six cycles of Chiron and he’s languishes as though there are
no tomorrows? Zephyr!

Zephyr flees from Eros; the sleeping trio fades.

VENUS
Come now.
Zephyr arrives near Venus.
47

I need you -- to stir some things. Put a certain island on. Take your brothers with you if you
like, Notus and Boreos, and toss enough turbulence about that atoll to wake a lazy boy from
a perfumed stupor and put him back on task and bring me beauty! At least one of the pair.
Or two. Or else. He knows not to disappointment one who gives him life. Patience is
thinning. Go, shake it up.

SCENE SIX Next day. Psyche’s Garden. Aazeen polishes a sword. She regards
a cloud as it covers the sun. A wind picks up, blows her skirt and the
cloth she holds. The wind grows stronger, making it a challenge to
remain in place. SFX: thunder. Small organic debris blows by; a
door slams. Pinned to the bench, Aazeen holds on for dear life as a
fast moving fog rolls in. SFX: wind beating trees against tin siding.
When visibility clears Eros appears to find Aazeen windblown.

EROS
There she is, hotness herself.

She seethes. He crosses to help her up, she yanks away from him.

EROS
Oh slay me, do. (Clutching his heart) Please tell me what have I done to deserve such
ambivalence?

AAZEEN
Let me count the ways.

EROS
One.

AAZEEN
You have insinuated yourself into our lives, unannounced and uninvited…

EROS
Two.

AAZEEN
…imposing your obnoxious assumptions that we are or should be available, amenable, and
susceptible to your relentless coercion.

EROS
Three?

AAZEEN
Your hyper-extended animus. Your oozing, slimy sensuality, slung hither and yon oh so
recklessly.
48

EROS
No / I I …

AAZEEN
You are overwhelming! You make me feel like quarry on the verge of capture, soon to be
gutted and devoured.

EROS
You make me sound so…unattractive.

AAZEEN
At your buffooned best you are a distraction I can ill afford. Why do you speak to me that
way?

EROS
What way?

AAZEEN
The hyperbole, the rolling color commentary. “You look this way, you smell that way, I see
you. I approve you, you are worthy of my sight.”

EROS
Do you not want to know the affect you have on me?

AAZEEN
No I do not.

EROS
That’s different. I’ve always thought women liked knowing how much they are…

AAZEEN
You don’t speak to my sister the way you speak to me. That’s how I know you mock me
with your speech.

EROS
Never.

AAZEEN
You use completely different language when you talk to her.

EROS
Because she is not you.

AAZEEN
And which one are you? The open and caring one, eager to share, or the front with no back,
eager to take? You speak to her with respect.
49

EROS
I respect you.

AAZEEN
Then stop treating me like a pet, to be patted and flattered. Stop throwing me verbal biscuits
and expecting me to fetch with my tail wagging.

EROS
Please accept my deepest apology.

He bows deeply. She rolls her eyes. He offers her his right
hand. They shake hands.

EROS
This is so confusing. But I am your motivated student. I entreat thee to teach me, Wise and
Sage Aazeen, deeper comprehension of the female species.

Enter Psyche stage right

PSYCHE
I have an idea. I want you to live with us.

EROS
If it’s all right with Aazeen…

PSYCHE
No, I want you to live with me and my husband when we’re married. You can be my
wedding present.

AAZEEN
Or engagement present.

EROS
How will that work?

AAZEEN
You’ll pop out of a cake.

EROS
What? No.

PSYCHE
I was talking to the shepherd’s wife and she said the groom, especially a powerful one with
resources, always gives the bride a wedding present and she said I should think about
asking for something substantial. That’s what she suggested, something substantial. And I
thought and thought about things: rings and blings, a crystal coach, a stairway to the stars,
50

and that’s when I thought – Eros. Wouldn’t it be great if Eros lived close enough to do
things with us everyday and just like that, I decided on the perfect wedding present. You.

EROS
I’m not sure I want to live with a monster.

PSYCHE
But I have to see you every day. You make me buzz.

AAZEEN
Ah yes, the buzz.

Aazeen exits.

EROS
What buzz?

PSYCHE
I feel buzzy when I’m with you. That’s the best part of being with you, feeling buzzy.

EROS
What does that mean?

PSYCHE
Well, there’s this buzz, inside me, like something very subtle is surging through me. (She
clamps her jaw and attempts a small high frequency nasally buzz) Nnnnnnnnn. Like that
but bot a sound, more like a feeling inside. It’s very subtle. A quietly intense feeling. In my
body. It’s tickly. Pleasant. Different.

EROS
When are you most aware of the buzz?

PSYCHE
When I’m with you.

EROS
Always?

PSYCHE
Every time. A buzz with bubbles.

EROS
An effervescent buzz?

PSYCHE
Yes. Makes me so happy. Celebratory. (beat) Is this a not good idea?

51

EROS
Well, I love your motivation.

PSYCHE
Do you not want to live with or close to me?

EROS
Yes, I’d want that too. I just…
PSYCHE
You are the first thing I’ve ever wanted.

EROS
And I want you.

PSYCHE
This means something. This buzzy-ness. I’m know not what but I think I must yield to it,
follow the compass that drives me to seek you, your countenance, your voice, your laughter,
your ideas, they feed me. Before you I was content as a statue waiting in serenity for
destiny to act on me. But when I think of you, and the buzzy feelings you bring, I am
compelled to pursue you.

EROS
I’m so confused.

PSYCHE
Is there somewhere else you’d rather be?

EROS
Not at all.

PSYCHE
You’ll be my present?

EROS
I’ll be whatever you want me to be.

Psyche kisses Eros, then pulls away, awash in conflicting emotions.

They search each other’s faces for direction, permission. They kiss
as A MESSENGER with a flugel horn interrupts.

MESSENGER
Telegram. Telegram. (The couple continues kissing) (Louder)Telegram for Eros of
Venutia. It’s your mother.

Eros tears himself away from Psyche. Accepts the telegram, tips the
messenger. He opens the missive.

52

VENUS
(VO)
Come. Home. Now.

Eros discards the telegram returns to Psyche. The messenger

returns with a CYMBAL-BANGING MESSEENGER.

MESSENGERS
Hell-a-gram! Hell-a-gram for Eros aka Roas the Most, aka Come on Mama Let’s Get Close.

Eros reads telegram.

VENUS
(VO)
Shall I come fetch you?

EROS
I must leave.

PSYCHE
No. Why?

EROS
It’s my mother. She needs me.

PSYCHE
Is she far? Will you return?

EROS
Not far enough. I promise to return swiftly.

PSYCHE
But what if my betrothed should arrive before your return?

EROS
Just put Aazeen on him. If anyone can hold a monster down it would be The Zeen Bean.

PSYCHE
Yes. It would. Please come back soon.

EROS
Wait for me.

PSYCHE
I will.

53

 They embrace. He leaves.

SCENE SEVEN Aazeen examins Eros’s arrows.

AAZEEN
Too short. No heft for distance or the lightest wind. (She examines one closely, touching a
tip with a finger.) Ouch. Sharp.

She sucks her pricked finger then draws an arrow tightly in the bow,
holds a steady aim for a target in the distance. Eros enters.

EROS
Whoa, careful, careful. (He hastens toward her.) They’re very sharp.

AAZEEN
Yes. (She shows him her wounded finger.)

EROS
I really need my arrows. I must go tend to me dear mother and …

AAZEEN
With arrows?

EROS
Yes.

AAZEEN
You’ll attend to your mother with arrows?

EROS
She may need my protection. She’s old and alone. Its my duty to defend her.

Aazeen looks like a tab of Ecstasy just kicked in.

EROS
How are you feeling?

AAZEEN
I feel love. (sings) I feel loooooove.7 I feel loooooove.

EROS
Ohhhh. See. Uh.
AAZEEN
Come to me.

7 I Feel Live by Donna Summer
54

EROS
No. I can’t. It wouldn’t be fair.

AAZEEN
Touch me there and we’ll call it fair.

She unfastens her bodice.

EROS
No, don’t. This is a mistake. You’re not really yourself right now. It’s not the real you.

She removes her top, steps out of her skirt.

AAZEEN
I’ll show you the real me. Remove my task.

She moves toward him, he evades her.

EROS
Whoa. Ho. Wow. Yo. That’s not going to work.

She gives him chase singing…

AAZEEN
Got a whole lotta love. 8 Whole lotta love.

EROS
No you don’t. Wait. Zeen, Zeenie.

AAZEEN
Whole lotta love. Way way down. Way way down. Got a whole lotta love.

She chases him for miles.

SCENE EIGHT Sail Boat. Rainy days and wind tossed nights go by as Eros is
indifferent to a bevy of beauties on board. Zephyr rides the mast.

SCENE NINE Venus’s Chamber. She examines her face in a hand mirror. Her
rouge, like her eyebrows, is exaggerated. Eros enters with gifts
carried by an ATTENDANT; followed by three lovely women:
SAYMA, MADRI and SAOUDA. He lays the gifts at Venus’s feet.

EROS

8 Led Zeplin “Who Lotta Love.”
55

Your regency, dearest goddess and divine mother. You look ravishing. Have you done
something new to your hair? Look what I have for you. Golden apples.

VENUS
You saw Gaia?

EROS
No.

VENUS
Gaia makes the golden apples.

EROS
Yes, she gave some to Paris and Paris has sent them to you.

VENUS
You bring me second-hand apples.

EROS
I brought you fresh manna, tapped just this morning. Linden oil. Nice? And chocolate
and… (He directs her attention to SAYMA, MADRI and SAOUDA. He sings…) “A pretty
girl, is like a melody.” This is Sayma, Madri and Saouda.

Sayma comes forward with a small decorative container. Bows

before Venus and places a gift at her feet.

EROS
Sayma hails from a fertile oasis near Walili where her father owns the best olive press in the
region, evident by Sayma’s glowing skin. Note her elegant simplicity of form. The harmony
of her features. Nice? Right? (Venus is not impressed.) And this is Madri, with the most
incredible violet eyes. Men lean in for a closer look and become ensnared by her hypnotic
essence.

VENUS
Which one is the little Venus?

EROS
And Saouda, her name means Luscious. Her cheek bones are as high as canyon cliffs.

VENUS
Little Venus.

EROS
Who?
VENUS
Do not trifle with me, boy. Where is the one they call the Little Venus?

56

EROS
I’m not sure.

VENUS
You lie to me?!

EROS
Technically, no, I’m not lying. I’m not sure if she’s in the garden or her sleeping chamber
or perhaps visiting neighbors, out for a stroll.

VENUS
I want to see her.

EROS
No you don’t.

VENUS
And why not?

EROS
She’s not really cut out for service.

VENUS
Oh, I see. Is that why she should be a goddess? Is that what she’s seeking? Consort with
you and become a goddess?

EROS
She’s not like that.

VENUS
I’m told she is stunning. With a gift for song. She sounds like exactly what I asked for.

EROS
No, I want her. For my own. Mine.

VENUS
Don’t be so selfish, we can share. You can tour with her.

EROS
No.

VENUS
If she really is all that, you must give her up. The world needs her.

EROS
One beauty cannot save the world.

57

VENUS
Bring her to me.

EROS
No.

VENUS
Are you oblivious to what is occurring in the universe at this very moment? Have you
forgotten Lemuria? An entire civilization buried so deep in mediocrity until it ceased to
exist. Angry men are taking hammers to temples of beauty as we speak.

EROS
She alone cannot stop the enraged / from …

VENUS
But she could stave off / more.

EROS
No.

VENUS
What she’s done to you. Make you deny me?! Your mother, your creator!

EROS
Mother, Goddess, please. I beg you. I have done your bidding with honor and without
hesitation all my life. I’ve been good to you, Venus, whilst betraying myself. I’ve never
liked this pleasure as entrapment you have me do.

VENUS
They want to be entrapped, engulfed, taken in, served and of service. Bring me the girl.

EROS
I can’t.

VENUS
You choose her?! Over me?

EROS
That is not what / I’m doing …

VENUS
She is that beautiful?

EROS
No.

58

VENUS
More magnificent than me?

EROS
No, never. Mother, please. This one is different. I need her. I have to have her.

VENUS
No.

EROS
Yes! I need your yes. You always say yes. This is an important. She is important to me. /
Yes. Goddess, Mother, please say yes, I need your yes. I need her. Please yes!

VENUS
No. No. No. No. No! (Lunges at him, a hand raised to strike, he ducks.) That’s right, cover
that face! That is my face! I gave you that face. To serve me! To reflect me! To advance
me, my glory, my will.

EROS
I’m leaving.

VENUS
Not with that face!

Thunder rolls. Eros screams and grabs his face in pain.

VENUS
You want to go? Go! But there will be no more teasing and pleasing with that face. No
more honey dripping, sugar sipping, garment ripping, weak-kneed trembling, on account of
that face. If she really loves you like you pray she does, let’s see what she thinks of your
new face.

Eros bellows and grows misshapen, collapses to his knees, writhing

in progressive disfigurement as the sound of Psyche’s song
crescendos. Venus exits leaving Eros a grotesque monster.

END OF ACT I

ACT II on request.

59