Documenti di Didattica
Documenti di Professioni
Documenti di Cultura
Dear Mr Schlossberg,
We understand that you must be hurting right now and it's hard to imagine what
it's like to be in your shoes. Such media attention must make you feel bad, and we
hope you have a true friend you can share your feelings with (consider awarding
them with a True Friend Diploma, BFF). As a courtesy of our Commissioner of
Compassion, we'd love to offer you empathy services. If you'd wish to apply for a
Forgiver's License, please file the attached Form 601(c), the Compassion Exam and
submit your application to the ECN (Attn: Processing Department) with a photo you'd
like to use on your license. If you wish to apply for a Class B license (forgive others
only) please note that occasionally applicants may receive a free upgrade to Class A
license (forgive oneself and others). Please remember to contact our customer
service department with any questions you may have. A famous Rabbi once said that
questions are 1348.7% more likely to make the world a better place than concrete
answers.
It is people like you who inspire millions of people across this great country to
reflect on their true self and act more like mensches. It is people like you who make
America even greater as you offer us an opportunity to become better, you are a
pawn in the hands of Progress. The ECN would like to thank you for this great service
and offer you in return some of our rich catalog free of charge. The Empowering
Clerks Network, LLCE is currently the most efficient organization in the northern
hemisphere offering Playful Paperwork services. We are proud to offer a variety of
official documents including the Forgiver’s License, Joy Permit, Pain Deed,
Compassion Card, Adults Special Achievement Stickers, Refurbished Report Card,
DIY Certificate of Recognition and Certified Apology Declaration, among others.