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Islam, Children and Looking after
our Selfs
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The fundamentals

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9/9/2010

http://islamicheritage.wordpress.com/

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Learning about Islam is about understanding life better and becoming a better person, the
knowledge we gain we also need so we have a moral code to teach our children from a
young age and this is something I would like to talk to about. If we teach them religion when
they are young rather than when they grow up it will feel natural to them like an instinct
and so they will struggle less with them self’s when they try to put their religion into
practice, they won’t have learned a lifetime of bad habits by the time they are grown up.

Our prophet has said “none of you will truly believe until your very inclinations are in line
with what Allah has revealed”.

This saying of the prophet proves that we are capable of changing our very instincts, but as
we get older it becomes harder to change since they are more ingrained into our
consciousness, if we become accepting of Allah, Allah accepts us, we have to become better
Muslim’s to be better parents.

Our Prophet once said "Every child is born on the [true] nature [of God] but his parents
make him either a Christian, Jew, or Magian." We should make our children Muslims, but we
first need to know Islam our self’s.

If you teach your son to pray when he is young he is more consciously aware of the prayer in
his life and it will be second nature to him and so keeping its times during his daily routine
will be less of a struggle. Similarly if you teach your daughter the hijab at a young age she
won’t question why Allah has instructed her to wear it at an older age. What you would be
doing is making the hijab normal in her eyes so she will struggle less with her own self
throughout her entire life. Teaching Islam to children is about establishing a healthy norm in
their consciousness. This is our responsibility as parents, making life easier for our children
so they will have a good life and a good end so Allah will accept them in his jannah.

A Respected scholar once said: Adopting an effective method for training children is
extremely important and necessary. It is because a child is Allah's trust in parents' hands and
the child's heart is like a nice, clean, and simple mirror which, although, is devoid of any
types of impressions or shapes, is capable of accepting the influence of all types of
impressions and influences and it can be inclined towards anything you like. Therefore, if
good habits are inculcated in the child and if he/she is instructed in knowledge, then the
child after gaining such excellent nourishment (upbringing), achieves the real success of this
life and of the life hereafter. In this [success], the parents and the teachers of the child
become entitled to a share in the rewards [from Allah for good upbringing of the child]. And
if bad habits are inculcated (nurtured) in a child and [if the child is] left unhindered
(unattended/free) like animals, then he/she gets destroyed after becoming ill mannered.
The burden of sin [of such negligence] falls on his/her guardian and caretaker. Allah, the
Exalted, has said [in the Holy Quran]:

"O Believers! Save Yourself and Your families from a Fire whose fuel is men and stones."
[66:6]

The Messenger of Allah (Peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: The children will
say to Allah on the Resurrection Day: “0 our Lord, take from him [our father] the account of
his duties towards us, he did not teach us what we did not know and he gave us unlawful
food to eat without our knowledge. Take compensation from him for these.

The Prophet also said: “Nobody will meet Allah with a greater sin than with a sin of keeping
his family members uneducated. Very few people will get release from this danger.”

He advised: When your children are grown up to seven years, teach them the prayers, and
when they are ten years old, seriously admonish them for it (in order that they establish
prayer regularly); and separate their sleeping beds from each other.

He also advised: The child is the master for [the first] seven years and a slave for [the next]
seven years and an advisor for [the next] seven years; so if he builds a good character within
21 years, well and good, otherwise leave him alone because you have discharged your
responsibility before Allah.

In other words Leave them free without restrictions for the first seven years, teach them
regulations and establish habits in the next seven years, then take them as your friends and
advisors for the next seven years.

If this is done the child will be one of the people who say “[Our life] takes its colour from
God, and who gives a better colour than God? [ what is meant is the deen on which Allah
naturally formed people so that its effect [in terms of qualities and character traits] appears
on the person who adopts it, as the dye shows in a garment. There is nothing better than it.]
It is Him we worship.” [2: 138]. This verse in the Qur’an is talking about Islam’s influence on
the human psychology and consciousness of people who adopt its practices.

There is also another essential reason why we should ensure our family has an Islamic
education and that is because if we don’t bother, they would know even less than us [and
their children even less than them] and won’t be able to defend them self’s against the
misguidance of shaytan, who will slowly after each generation after us move them gradually
away from religion all together. This can be illustrated by understanding how idol
worshiping first began.
For many generations the Prophet Noah's people had been worshipping statues that they
called gods. They believed that these gods would bring them good, protect them from evil
and provide all their needs. They gave their idols names such as Waddan, Suwa'an,
Yaghutha, Ya'auga, and Nasran, (These idols represented, respectively, manly power;
mutability, beauty; brute strength, swiftness, sharp sight, insight) according to the power
they thought these gods possessed. Allah the Almighty revealed: "They (idolaters) have said:
"You shall not leave your gods nor shall you leave Wadd, nor Suwa, nor Yaghuth, nor Ya uq
nor Nasr (names of their idols)." (71:23 Quran).

These Idols used to be righteous people who lived in the period between Adam and Noah
and had followers who held them as role models. After their death, their friends who used
to emulate them said: 'If we make statues of them, it will be more pleasing to us in our
worship and will remind us of them.' So they build statues of them, and, after they had died
and others came after them, Iblis crept into their minds saying: ‘Your forefathers used to
worship them, and through that worship they got rain.' So they worshipped them." Later
generations did not even know why they had been erected; they only knew their parents
had prayed to them and so did the same since they had no understanding of Allah the
Almighty Who would punish them for their evil deeds, they became cruel and immoral.

Ibn Abi Hatim related this story: "Waddan was a righteous man who was loved by his
people. When he died, they withdrew to his grave in the land of Babylonia and were
overwhelmed by sadness. When Iblis saw their sorrow caused by his death, he disguised
himself in the form of a man saying: 'I have seen your sorrow because of this man's death;
can I make a statue like him which could be put in your meeting place to make you
remember him?' They said: 'Yes.' So he made the statue like him. They put it in their
meeting place in order to be reminded of him. When Iblis saw their interest in remembering
him, he said: 'Can I build a statue of him in the home of each one of you so that he would be
in everyone's house and you could remember him?' They agreed. Their children learned
about and saw what they were doing. They also learned about their remembrance of him
instead of Allah. So the first to be worshipped instead of Allah was Waddan, the idol which
they named thus."

That is how idol worshipping developed, slowly and slowly iblis took them away from
religion, he told the first generation to do something that wasn’t even harmful in their eyes,
but once their children saw this as normal he came back and told them to do something
more, once this was seen as normal, again he came back and only then lied to them and
asked them to worship the statues. We may do things that seem normal to our own
understanding but our actions may have consequences we don’t even realise, we are the
role models for our children it is us who they will emulate in life, our good habits will be
passed on to them and so will our bad habits, this is why we have to take care of our self’s.
I would now like to talk about Islam in general and present it as best I can, there are a
number of different areas we can cover but I though the following would be a good start
insha allah.

We have sent down the Scripture to you [Prophet] with the truth so that you can judge
between people in accordance with what God has shown you.[4:105]

There are various sources for Islamic law or the Sharia. The primary sources, accepted
universally by all Muslims, are the Qur'an and Sunnah. The Qur'an as you know is the direct
and unaltered word of Allah. The Sunnah consists of the religious actions and quotations of
the Prophet Muhammad, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, as narrated [told to us]
through his Companions.

A hadith is a saying or narration of the Prophet’s speech, deed, approval or disapproval -

whether spoken or tacit - about something as told by one of his companions or family. The
hadiths [or factual stories] have been learned by heart by the early Muslim generations,
later recorded, authenticated [as some people fabricated some stories] and handed down to
us through the centuries. This is how we know the prophets life and actions as well as the
Quran.

The Qur'an is the first and most important source of Islamic law revealed to the prophet
through the angel Gabriel in Mecca and Medina. The scripture specifies the moral,
philosophical, social, political and economic basis on which a society should be constructed.
The verses revealed in Mecca deal with philosophical and theological issues, whereas those
revealed in Medina are concerned with socio-economic laws.

It is a recitation that We have revealed in parts, so that you can recite it to people at
intervals; We have sent it down little by little.[17:106]

The Qur’an was revealed over a period of 23 years not all at once, an event or trial would
occur as the prophet was calling people to Islam and Allah would reveal versus of the Qur’an
to guide the Muslims. For example the verse “Do not be an advocate for those who betray
trust” Was revealed about a man from Medina who stole a suit of armour and accused a
Jew of doing it. He brought his family to ask the Prophet to rule against the Jew and he was
about to do this when these verses were revealed.

The Sunnah is the next important source of Sharia [Islamic Law], and is commonly defined as
"the traditions and customs of Muhammad" or "the words, actions and silent assertions of
him". During his lifetime, the prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, made it
clear that his traditions (along with the Qur'an) should be followed after his death. The
Sunnah is a supplement and clarification of the Qur'an, the Sunnah elaborates on the Qur’an
a verse would be revealed by Allah and the prophet would explain its meaning. We can look
at the way of life, or Sunnah, of the prophet and his companions to discover what to imitate
and what to avoid.
So we don’t just follow the actions of the prophet but those of his companions as well since
it was the prophet himself who taught them Islam and we are learning Islam through there
life experiences and remember the Quran was revealed to Guide them initially as Allah was
speaking to them about what they were doing at the time.

I would like to introduce a type of hadith called hadith Qudsi. Hadith Qudsi or Sacred Hadith
is a sub-category of hadith. Muslims regard Hadith Qudsi as the words of Allah but not the
Quran. The Hadith Qudsi differ from the Qur'an in that the Hadith were revealed in a dream
or through revelation and are "expressed in the prophets own words", whereas the Quran is
the "direct words of Allah" or basically one is the prophets own wording and explanations
while the other is Allah’s own literal words, Allah intended the Quran as a book while hadith
Qudsi you can imagine as personnel conversations the prophet had with Allah which Allah
did not intended to be a revelation part of the Quran.

Among the Hadith Qudsi the prophet related from Allah (glorified and exalted be He) is that
He said: Allah has written down the good deeds and the bad ones. Then He explained it [by
saying that] he who has intended a good deed and has not done it, Allah writes it down with
Himself as a full good deed, but if he has intended it and has done it, Allah writes it down
with Himself as from ten good deeds to seven hundred times, or many times over. But if he
has intended a bad deed and has not done it, Allah writes it down with Himself as a full good
deed, if he has intended it and has done it, Allah writes it down as only one bad deed.

The Messenger of Allah also said: The first of people against whom judgment will be
pronounced on the Day of Resurrection will be a man who died a martyr. He will be brought
and Allah will make known to him His favours and he will recognize them. [The Almighty]
will say: And what did you do about them? He will say: I fought for you until I died a martyr.
He will say: You have lied - you did but fight that it might be said [of you]: He is courageous.
And so it was said. Then he will be ordered to be dragged along on his face until he is cast
into Hell-fire.

[Another] will be a man who has studied [religious] knowledge and has taught it and who
used to recite the Quran. He will be brought and Allah will make known to him His favours
and he will recognize them. [The Almighty] will say: And what did you do about them? He
will say: I studied [religious] knowledge and I taught it and I recited the Quran for Your sake.
He will say: You have lied - you did but study [religious] knowledge that it might be said [of
you]: He is learned. And you recited the Quran that it might be said [of you]: He is a reciter.
And so it was said. Then he will be ordered to be dragged along on his face until he is cast
into Hell-fire.

[Another] will be a man whom Allah had made rich and to whom He had given all kinds of
wealth. He will be brought and Allah will make known to him His favours and he will
recognize them. [The Almighty] will say: And what did you do about them? He will say: I left
no path [untrodden] in which You like money to be spent without spending in it for Your
sake. He will say: You have lied - you did but do so that it might be said [of you]: He is open-
handed. And so it was said. Then he will be ordered to be dragged along on his face until he
is cast into Hell-fire.
This perfectly illustrates the prophets saying that "The reward of deeds depends upon the
intentions and every person will get the reward according to what he has intended. So
whoever emigrated for worldly benefits or for a woman to marry, his emigration was for
what he emigrated for." It’s what you intend in your heart that counts.

The Messenger of Allah said: "Allah (mighty and sublime be He) said: ‘If My servant likes to
meet Me, I like to meet him; and if he dislikes to meet Me, I dislike to meet him.’"

"A man sinned greatly against himself, and when death came to him he charged his sons,
saying: ‘When I have died, burn me, then crush me and scatter [my ashes] into the sea, for,
by Allah, if my Lord takes possession of me, He will punish me in a manner in which He has
punished no one *else+.’ So they did that to him. Then He said to the earth: ‘Produce what
you have taken - and there he was!’ And He said to him: ‘What induced you to do what you
did?’ He said: ‘Being afraid of You, O my Lord (or he said: ‘Being frightened of You’),’ and
because of that He forgave him."

The following hadith is considered one of the most important hadiths in Islam as it outlines
the most important aspects of our religion *another I mentioned above, “everything is
according to its intention”+.

'Umar, may Allah be pleased with him said, "While we were sitting with the Messenger of
Allah, may Allah bless with him and grant him peace, one day a man came up to us whose
clothes were extremely white, whose hair was extremely black, upon whom traces of
travelling could not be seen, and whom none of us knew, until he sat down close to the
Prophet, may Allah bless with him and grant him peace, so that he rested his knees upon his
knees and placed his two hands upon his thighs and said,

'Muhammad, tell me about Islam.' The Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant
him peace, said, 'Islam is that you witness that there is no god but Allah and that
Muhammad is the Messenger of Allah, and you establish the prayer, and you give the Zakat,
and you fast Ramadan, and you perform the hajj of the House if you are able to take a way
to it.' He said, 'You have told the truth,' and we were amazed at him asking him and [then]
telling him that he told the truth.

He said, 'Tell me about iman.' He said, 'That you affirm Allah, His angels, His books, His
messengers, and the Last Day, and that you affirm the Decree, the good of it and the bad of
it.' He said, 'You have told the truth.'

He said, 'Tell me about ihsan [moral perfection, or perfection of ones character].' He said,
'That you worship Allah as if you see Him, for if you don't see Him then truly He sees you.'

He said, 'Tell me about the Hour.' He said, 'The one asked about it knows no more than the
one asking.' He said, 'Then tell me about its signs.' He said, 'That the female slave should
give birth to her mistress, and you see poor, naked, barefoot shepherds of sheep and goats
competing in making tall buildings.' He went away, and I remained some time. Then he
asked, 'Umar, do you know who the questioner was?' I said, 'Allah and His Messenger know
best.' He said, 'He was Jibril who came to you to teach you your deen'."

Jibril had the opportunity to sum up what a Muslim should believe or the essence of what
Allah wants from us and the above are the areas of knowledge he focused on which is an
indication of how important they are.

Ihsan is an Arabic term meaning "perfection" or "excellence." Ihsan is the Muslim

responsibility to obtain perfection, or excellence in worship or personal character, such that
Muslims try to worship Allah as if they see Him, and although they cannot see Him, they
undoubtedly believe he is constantly watching over them. The concept of ihsan is primarily
associated with the intention behind our actions or the sincerity of our actions "They were
only ordered to worship Allah, making their deen sincerely His, as people of pure natural
faith," (98:5) and "Worship Allah, making your deen sincerely His." (39:2). As the hadith
above about the three people whom Allah judged as being insincere in their actions and as a
result they were sent jahanam indicates, sincerity in our heart is everything, Whether you
keep your words secret or state them openly, He knows the contents of every heart.[67:13]

The Prophet Muhammad said: “God does not judge you according to your appearance and
your wealth, but He looks at your hearts and looks into your deeds."

One who practices Ihsan is labelled muhsin. Allah is with those who are mindful of Him and
with those who do good (muhsinun)." (Surat an-Nahl: 128) and "Those who do good
(ahsanou) will have the best and more!" (Surah Yunus: 26).

It is established from the Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, that the
explanation of the 'increase' [“will have the best and more”] is gazing upon the face of Allah,
exalted is He, in the Garden, The reward is commensurate with the efforts made, it is a
recompense for the people of ihsan, since ihsan is that the mu’min should worship his Lord
in the world as if he sees Him and is mindful of him in all his actions throughout the day it is
the highest form of human perfection one can achieve consequently it has the highest
reward. The opposite of this is the recompense of the kuffar in the next life, "No indeed!
Rather that Day they will be veiled from their Lord," (Surat al-Mutaffifin: 15) the punishment
for that state of ghaflah or heedlessness [ignoring or being blind of Allah] is that they are
veiled from seeing Him in the next life and which as the prophet alluded is one of the
highest forms of joy.

The Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, asked his companion, "Harithah,
how are you this morning?" He said, "This morning I have become a true mu’min." He said,
"Think about what you are saying! Because every statement has a reality." He said,
"Messenger of Allah, my self dislikes the world, so that it is sleepless at night and thirsty in
the day, and it is as if I am gazing upon the Throne of my Lord appearing, and it is as if I am
gazing upon the people of the Garden in the Garden and how they visit each other in it, and
as if I am gazing upon the people of the Fire and how they howl in it." He said, "You have
seen, so remain firm. [You are] a slave whom Allah has illuminated the iman in his heart."
The other important point in the main hadith is how close the day of judgment is, rasul allah
made a number of prophesies or predictions about events that would occur in the future
“poor, naked, barefoot shepherds of sheep and goats “ is referring to the once nomadic
Arabs of the middle east who are now rich because of the oil, not less than 100 years ago
you would have seen them living in tents in the desert or “poor, naked, barefoot shepherds
of sheep and goats “. But now you might be interested to know that recently the United
Arab Emirates built the world’s tallest building called the Burj Khalifah www.burjkhalifa.ae/.
This is something he predicted and now we are seeing it coming true a sign of how the hour
is.

What are the disbelievers waiting for, other than the Hour which will come upon them
unawares? Its signs are already here, but once the Hour has actually arrived, what use will it
be then to take heed? [47:18]

During judgment itself, our own book of deeds will be opened, and will be apprised of every
action we did and every word we spoke. Actions taken during childhood are not judged. The
account of deeds is so detailed that we will be in awe at how comprehensive the account is,
such that even lesser and trivial deeds [in our minds] are included, Imagine a judgment or
scale whose sensitivity is to an atom’s weight. Throughout judgment the underlying
principle is that of a complete and perfect justice administered by Allah. The accounts of
judgment are also replete with the emphasis that Allah is merciful and forgiving, and that
mercy and forgiveness will be granted to us on that day, Allah created one hundred parts of
mercy and He distributed one part to His creation [by virtue of which there is mutual love
between the people] and kept ninety nine parts with Himself for the Day of Resurrection.

Then shall anyone who has done an atom's weight of good will see it, and anyone who has
done an atom's weight of evil, shall see it. [99:7-8]