SONG: THAT’S HOW WE WIN

TOMMY
D A/C#
ALL THOSE DAYS YOU SLEPT IN CLASS
G7 D
I LEARNED SOMETHING KEY
D A/C#
THE GOLDEN RULE, THE SPECIAL SECRET
C G/B A F#/A#
OF PYSCHOLOGY

Bm Edim/Bb
MOST PEOPLE AT ONE TIME OR ANOTHER
D/A E/G#
THINK THEY’VE GONE NUTS
Bm
ALTHOUGH THEY’VE NEVER BEEN
Edim/Bb
OF COURSE THEY’RE NOT,
D/A E7
OR ELSE THEY WOULDN’T THINK THAT
G A
SO THEY’LL COME TO US
D
THAT’S HOW WE WIN

STEVE
What do you mean?!

TOMMY
D A/C#
A PERSON OF INSANITY
G7 D
CANNOT DETECT INSANE
D A/C#
ONE CAN’T TELL IF THE BRAIN AIN’T RIGHT
C G/B A F#/A#
OR IF THEY AIN’T RIGHT IN THE BRAIN
Bm D/A
WE WON’T GET LOONIES
E/G# G7
JUST PEOPLE WITH BAD DAYS
D G/A
SO PUT THIS ON, WE CAN’T GO WRONG
WHAT DO YOU SAY D
 Have yo STEVE
G/B A/C#
THAT’S HOW WE WIN?

D TOMMY
THAT’S HOW WE WIN

G/B A/C# STEVE

THAT’S HOW WE WIN

D TOMMY
THAT’S HOW WE WIN!
G7
WE CAN WIN WITH CONFIDENCE

D STEVE
WHERE’S YOUR SELF-DISCIPLINE?!

Bm Edim/Bb TOMMY
JUST DO WHATEVER I TELL YOU TO
D/A E/G#
AND I KNOW WE’RE IN
G/A
YOU AND ME, PAL
D
THAT’S HOW WE WIN

STEVE
I don’t know, it sounds kind of dangerous to me.

TOMMY
Danger? What danger? They’ll be nit wits, Steve; people with enough sanity that they
recognize their craziness. I wouldn’t want to mess around with anyone who’s actually
cuckoo.
G7
WE’RE ENTIRELY PROTECTED
D
WITH THIS SYSTEM THAT I’VE BUILT
G7
WE’LL BE SET FOR VICTORY
D
IF YOU AREN’T OVERCOME WITH GUILT
Bm Edim/Bb D/A E/G#
WE WOULDN’T MES WITH ANYONE WHO’S ACTUALLY DISTRAUGHT
G
WE’LL MAKE UP CURES, CHARGE THEM BIG!
G/A A STEVE
AND PRAY WE DON’T GET CAUGHT

D TOMMY
THAT’S HOW WE WIN

G/B A/C# STEVE

THAT’S HOW WE WIN

D TOMMY
THAT’S HOW WE

C TOMMY/STEVE
WIN
D/C C
WE’LL GET PATIENT-AFTER-PATIENT
D/C C
AND WIN TIME AND TIME AGAIN
G/B
THAT’S HOW WE WIN
A
THAT’S HOW WE WIN
G G/A
YOU AND ME, PAL
D
THAT’S HOW WE WIN

STEVE
What’s in it for me?

TOMMY
I’ll give you one third of what we make.

STEVE
One third?

TOMMY
Well it’s my house and my idea. Hey, one third is better than nothing.

STEVE
Alright. Tell me, what do I do?

TOMMY
Well first of all, you answer the door. If they ask for the doctor, come in and tell me who
it is, and then bring them in and sit them down there.

STEVE
Then what?
 TOMMY
Beat it. Unless I need you for some sort of special demonstration, like if someone throws
a fit.

STEVE
I thought you said they wouldn’t be crazy! If anyone throws a fit, I’m out!

TOMMY
Relax, Steve!
KEY CHANGE???

Eb Bb/D
IF THEY SEE THE AD AND THINK “THAT’S ME”
Ab7 Eb
SURELY THEY’RE NOT LOST
Eb Bb/D
SO WE ASK WHAT’S EATING THEM
Db Ab/C Bb G/B
ALL FOR THE RIGHT COST
Cm Eb/Bb F/A
WE’LL SCAM ‘EM, SLAM ‘EM OUT THE DOOR
Ab7
AND ONTO THE NEXT
Ab/Bb
DON’T FORGET STEVE
Eb Ab7 Bb G/B
THEY’RE DEALING WITH THE BEST!
C’mon!

Need something here?

Cm Fdim/B TOMMY
MOST PEOPLE AT ONE TIME OR ANOTHER

STEVE
OR ANOTHER

Eb/B F/A TOMMY

THINK THEY’VE GONE NUTS

STEVE
GONE NUTS

Cm BOTH
ALTHOUGH THEY’VE NEVER BEEN
Fdim/B TOMMY
OF COURSE THEY’RE NOT,

STEVE
THEY’RE NOT

Eb/Bb F7 BOTH
OR ELSE THEY WOULDN’T THINK THAT
Ab Ab/Bb
SO THEY’LL COME TO US
Eb
THAT’S HOW WE WIN

Ab/C Bb STEVE
THAT’S HOW WE WIN

Eb TOMMY
THAT’S HOW WE WIN

Ab/C Bb STEVE
THAT’S HOW WE WIN

Eb Eb7 TOMMY
THAT’S HOW WE WIN!
Ab7
WE CAN WIN WITH CONFIDENCE

Eb STEVE
AND SOME SELF-DISCIPLINE

TOMMY
Cm Fdim/B
JUST BITE YOUR TOUNGE, EYES ON THE PRIZE
Eb/Bb F/A
AND I KNOW WE’RE IN
Ab/Bb
YOU AND ME, PAL
Fm7 Bb
WE’LL GET THROUGH IT SOMEHOW

Ab/Bb STEVE
GET ME SOME ADVIL NOW

Ab Bb TOMMY
YOU AND ME, PAL!
Eb
THAT’S HOW WE WIN