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Brandon J. Watkins

ENGL 683

Dr. Hartman

8 November 2017

WAD Part II Reflection Letter

Dr. Hartman,
I have had such an amazing time working to complete this part of the WAD project. I tutor two local
college students and one of the students agreed to work through this assignment with me. I felt just like a
college-level writing instructor! The entire experience was both eye-opening and reflective for myself and the
student.
For the student, it took a lot of questioning and reflection to get to an idea of what they wanted to
declare as their belief statement. We toggled with many ideas; basketball is the best sport, college should be
free and many others. We finally homed in on family and faith after completing our Rush Write activity.
Student 1 is very active in his church and is very close to his family. To be honest, I kind of had to drive the
conversation, but I kind of expected that. Student 1 opened up and began to talk about the different struggles
and hardships his family had gone through in the past few years. One of those being what he writes about in his
essay; his aunt being diagnosed and beating breast cancer.
Student 1 and I met, in person, three different times. During our first meeting, we discussed what I
mentioned above. During our second meeting, we completed the planning document and our third meeting he
submitted his essay to be for assessment. We conferenced several times through e-mail and through phone
conversation.
For me, the process was tedious but I knew there would be reaping would be greatly for the both of us. I
honestly had moments of reflection on what my beliefs are and how those beliefs shape my everyday life. On
the teacher side, I was able to see the constructing, coaching and assessment aspects of a writing project with
someone other than a 7th grader. There is no much difference yet so many similarities. For example, I found that
Student 1 was more dependent on my advice, just like my 7th graders, then I expected them to be. Also, Student
1 made careless errors in drafts like my 7th graders.
Overall, I enjoyed the assignment and I look forward to may be using this assignment or an assignment
similar to this in my classroom.

Brandon
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Personal Narrative Assignment


This I Believe Essay
Instructions & Guidelines

A belief is trust, faith or confidence in someone or something. Beliefs are elements in our world that drive,
motivate and cultivate the actions of individuals. One can believe in someone or something for many different
reasons; those reasons may be religious, cultural, social or economic. As a college student, you are continually
engaged in conversations about social, political and economic change. To fully be an agent of change, you
must establish a solid foundation of beliefs.

Context: This Personal Narrative assignment will be used in a Freshman Composition course as the first
assigned writing piece. Prior to this assignment, students will have had lessons on characteristics of a personal
narrative, lessons on voice, tone, point of view and how to effectively incorporate imagery in writing.

Student Objectives:
Students will recall specific events, emotions, and impact of life experiences.
Students will demonstrate their ability to maintain a consistent tone and focus throughout their
writing.
Students will demonstrate their ability to produce clear and coherent writing that includes specific and
solid details and vivid imagery.

Purpose: To write a personal narrative essay that illustrates a belief that shapes your daily life. What is a
personal narrative? A personal narrative is an essay about a personal experience usually writing in first person.
The essay should be written to have an emotional impact on the reader.

Audience: You will record a podcast of yourself reading your essay. Your podcast will be posted to the NPR
website for national and international ears. Additionally, you will present your essay to your class.

Focus: Beliefs are not necessarily unique to you, but the way you present your belief should be personalized.
Your belief statement should state your belief and the reasons why you believe. Your reasons will serve as
your body paragraphs for the essay. Your goal is to leave the reader with a clear sense of your beliefs.

Style: This is a rather short essay, so you will to be concise and to the point in your writing. You should choose
only the most important and most specific details to describe what you believe. You may begin your paper
with a hook that grabs your readers attention. Your hook can be a sound, a question, a personal story or
dialogue. Think about what style would best reflect your own personality and best reflect the belief you chose.
Remember, this is not a lecture to your audience.

Process: To start, Rush Write about aspects of your daily life.


What are common occurrences in your life?
What are your guiding principles?
What important event or person in your life shaped a strong belief in you?

After you have chosen one belief to focus on, you will need to bring attention to a personal story that
demonstrates this belief and how you live by it.
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Examples of Belief Statements:


I believe that challenges are good.
I believe all people are morally good.

Production: This essay must be two pages, formatted in the 8th MLA edition. It must also meet these
requirements: 12-point font, doubled-spaced, Times New Roman, one-inch margins all around. Please include
an original title in the center at the top of the essay.

Your essay must include the following


A belief statement that explains your belief and serves as a guide for your essay. I believe that I
believe in
You tell a story using specific and solid details to show how this belief guides your daily living.
Your essay is personal and exclusive to you and you express this by using your own voice.
You present your belief, story and ideas in a well-organized fashion. Your thoughts are fully developed
and effective.
Your essay is at least two pages long.
You have submitted a draft for peer review, instructor conference and have checked carefully for
grammatical errors.

Characteristics to Use in Your This I Believe (Personal Narrative) Essay:


First Person Point of View
Dialogue
Action
Focus/Purpose
Imagery and Details

These guidelines listed are from the This I Believe webpage. Please keep these guidelines near as you start
constructing your piece. http://www.thisibelieve.org/essaywritingtips.html

Tell a story: Be specific. Take your belief out of the ether and ground it in the events of your life. Consider moments
when belief was formed or tested or changed. Think of your own experience, work, and family, and tell of the things you
know that no one else does. Your story need not be heart-warming or gut-wrenchingit can even be funnybut it
should be real. Make sure your story ties to the essence of your daily life philosophy and the shaping of your beliefs.

Name your belief: If you can't name it in a sentence or two, your essay might not be about belief. Also, rather than
writing a list, consider focusing on one core belief, because three minutes is a very short time. Be positive: Please avoid
preaching or editorializing. Tell us what you do believe, not what you don't believe. Avoid speaking in the editorial "we."
Make your essay about you; speak in the first person.

Be personal: Write in words and phrases that are comfortable for you to speak. We recommend you read your essay
aloud to yourself several times, and each time edit it and simplify it until you find the words, tone, and story that truly
echo your belief and the way you speak.

Questions to consider in the planning of your draft


What is my belief? Why is it important?
Who is my audience?
What does my audience already know?
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What is my position?
How should I write my introduction to grab my readers attention?

Revision: Revision is an important step in the writing process which is often skipped by students. You should
begin the revision step with a self-review in which you can use the following questions to evaluate your
personal narrative. These questions should help you to evaluate your writing and identify where you need to
refocus or revise:
Does your essay tell a story? What is the story?
Is your belief clearly stated in a sentence of two? What is the belief?
Does your essay have sufficient details and imagery? Provide textual evidence.
Does the essay meet the list of characteristics for a personal narrative?
Assessment: Student essays will be assessed using the rubric below.
Essay Requirement: Exceeds Expectations Meets Expectations Below Expectations Not attempted
(20 points) (15 points) (10 points) (0 points)

Content 2-page essay has a 2-page essay has a Less than required Essay does not meet page
strong personal belief stated personal belief page count. Essay length requirement and
with clear personal with personal does not clearly does not provide even a
examples to support examples so support state its purpose weak belief with
your purpose your purpose. Belief and/or provide examples
and examples could be necessary examples
clearer.
Organization Essay is organized Essay is organized and Essay is somewhat Essay is not organized;
and well-planned planned uses some organized and unclear introduction; no
with transitions transitions between somewhat planned connection between
between introduction, support and uses few introduction, support and
introduction, support and conclusion transitions between conclusion
and conclusion introduction,
support and
conclusion
Language Essay includes several Essay provides some Essay provides few There were no examples
examples of imagery examples of imagery examples of imagery of imagery, figurative
that help illustrate that help to illustrate that help to language
the event, emotions the event, emotions illustrate the event,
and values of the and values of the essay emotions and values
essay of the essay
Conventions/Editing Essay was edited and Essay includes Essay was not edited Essay was not edited and
including notes from appropriate notes, but and errors distract unable to read.
peer review and some errors are still from the essay
instructor conference present

Podcast Recording The speaker reads in The speaker speaks The speaker speaks Podcast not attempted
a calm voice, calmly, narrator may in a rushed manner,
enunciation is clear pause. stumbles over
and the narration is words.
uninterrupted.
Grading Scale 90-100 (A), 80-89 (B), 70-79 (C), 60-69 (D), 59 below (F)
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Assignment Timeline

Tuesday, October 9 Assignment Instructions & Guidelines handout given and reviewed in class.

Monday, October 16 Monday, October 23 Instructor Conferences


- Sign up for a time on the sign-up sheet passed around during class.
- Conference with the instructor will last for approximately 30 minutes. Please plan to stay the entire 30 minutes.
There will be point reduction in the final grade for arriving late or leaving early from the conference.
- Be on time and prepared for your conference.
- When you come for your conference please have the following: completed essay planning document, at least
three paragraphs written. Those who fail to adhere to these requirements will receive a zero for the conference
point of the grade.

Thursday, October 25 Peer Review


- Please bring a completed draft to class. All students will participate in a peer review.
- Please complete the Peer Review form as you participate in the peer review session.

Tuesday, October 31 Final Submission


- Bring a copy of your completed, edited draft to class on Tuesday, October 31.
- Submit an electronic copy of your completed, edited draft to the link on our courses Blackboard page.

Tuesday, November 6 Podcast due


- Submit your podcast to the link on the courses Blackboard page.
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This I Believe (Personal Narrative) Essay


Planning Document Student 1

Title of Essay: Gods Healing Power

What is your belief? I believe in the healing power of God

How did you come to this belief? Identify three events that led you to this belief. Be specific and use details:
1. Being healed from small sickness such as common colds, flu, pneumonia, etc.

2. Seeing my Aunt Kathy battle with breast cancer and survive.

What is your introduction plan? What is your hook?


I will talk about how I have been in church all of my life, hearing about how God being a healer and then going into
seeing it for myself.

How has your belief had a positive impact on your life or on the lives of those around you? Explain or tell a story why
it was positive. OR tell how not following this belief has had a negative impact on your life or on the lives of those
around you.
My belief has caused my family to become heavy prayers and heavily reliant on God.

What lesson(s) lessons have you learned by practicing your belief? Be very specific! How do you incorporate this
belief into your daily living? Give at least two examples from your life that demonstrate your belief.
1. God is a man of his word

2. Trust and believe in God and the power of prayer

3. Be strong when test and trials come.

Are there any examples from the real-world that support your belief? Can you point to anyone else (family member,
friend, sibling, celebrity) who shares your belief? When and how have you seen this person carrying out his belief?
Again, be very specific in your example and provide concrete detail that supports your statement.
Aunt Kathys battle with cancer

Why should your audience care about your belief? What can your readers learn from your belief?
It can show others to believe that God will help them when they need it most.
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Student 1

Watkins

English 101

7 November 2017

Believing in the Power of God!

Sometimes you have to experience trials before you actually believe. Ive seen people experience trials

mentally, physically, and spiritually. Watching people go through trials, I have witnessed and believe in all

powers of God.

In church I was taught that God has all power, the power to heal, to deliver, and to save. Ive been told Commented [BW1]: Add a colon when giving a list.

that God heals the sick, delivers us from all things; cancer, diabetes, and even common colds and on top of that

hell even save us from our sins. Free of charge, but did I actually believe all of this? Commented [BW2]: Use a comma.

I, in reality, had to experience a number of things on the personal level before I actually believed that

God could heal. A couple years ago, my Aunt Kathy was diagnosed with Breast Cancer. Cancer is one of the

most common illnesses in America. Aunt Kathy is the rock of my family, a Christian lady, a firm believer in

God and Aunt Kathy was one that was possessed with a loving spirit. Aunt Kathy is our go to lady whenever

we have questions concerning our spirituality and she always gave us advice on any other issues that we faced

in life. I have always thought that she was and still is one Gods chosen children. She never angers, is always

patient, a true lady and most importantly my familys role model. Commented [BW3]: Great sketch of your aunt. Be careful
of tenses.

Aunt Kathys battle with cancer wasnt one full of sun shining days; days of a smiling face, but ones of a Commented [BW4]: What do you mean here? Elaborate
more.
hurting heart. Many days were filled with pain, crying, and wondering. Im pretty sure she wondered why had

she been chosen for this battle, but she continued to thank God during the process. My aunt continued her battle

with cancer through surgery, treatments, and medication, but she never gave up on God.
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My family and I continued to pray for her recovery, and for her strength. I can still remember seeing her

lying in the hospital bed after coming out of surgery, sedated and unaware of the things that were going on

around her. I finally started to realize that God had begun his work; his work of healing. Had my prayers and Commented [BW5]: What, specifically, inspired you to
think this?
the rest of my familys prayers been answered?

I can remember asking Aunt Kathy how she was feeling, how things were, and she would always answer Commented [BW6]: Need a comma with dialogue.

Im fine and Im not worried. She never complained about pain, or about any other struggles or situations that

came her way. She always says that God is able. He is able to heal us from anything that we are battling with

and there is nothing too big or too small for God. She knew that God was protecting her and that he wouldnt

leave her side.

Often I would wonder if Aunt Kathy really believed that things would get better or was she just saying Commented [BW7]: Needs comma.

those things to keep the family strong. We have lost family members to cancer before, so the emotions at this

stage were familiar. We hadnt given up on God then and we were definitely not about to give up on him now. I

can remember the old saying God may not come when you want him too, but hes always on time and that I

did believe. Commented [BW8]: Strong voice! YES! I feel it!

I believe that God can heal us from anything that we are going through. Whether it is psychical, mental,

or spiritual illness nothing is too big for God to handle. There were times that my faith was tested through

people that are very close to me and to me, thats when I really had to take God at his word and believe

everything that he said. I believe that God will never put more on us than we can bear, he has a test for all of us

to take, but he will be right there with us and for us. He will never leave us alone. Often I wonder if Im the only Commented [BW9]: Needs comma

person that is going through what Im going through. God reassures me that Im not; someone else struggles

with the same thing that Ive struggled with; diabetes, depression, headaches, and sleepless nights. God can and

will heal all of our wounds.


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Yes I believe that we have to experience trials before we actually believe that God will heal. Aunt Kathy Commented [BW10]: Needs comma.

was healed completely from her Breast Cancer, and still is the rock of my family. And I do believe in Gods

healing power. Commented [BW11]: Wow! Such an awesome full


circle ending.

Student 1,

You have done a great job using the example of your aunts cancer battle to illustrate your belief. As a

reader, I can feel your love and respect for her, just as I can see your faith in God. Overall, your

essay is well-written and clear, but there are several careless errors. Also, I feel like you could do

more to develop the meat of your essay more use of dialogue, imagery and detail. There are some

points that are too vague and could be more concrete. Finally, how might you use other examples to

expand the content of your essay? Could you illustrate mental and spiritual trails just as you show

your aunts physical battle?

Thank you for your hard work! See the rubric below for grading and scoring.
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Essay Requirement: Exceeds Expectations Meets Expectations Below Expectations Not attempted
(20 points) (15 points) (10 points) (0 points)

Content 2-page essay has a 2-page essay has a Less than required Essay does not meet
strong personal stated personal belief page count. Essay page length requirement
belief with clear with personal does not clearly and does not provide
personal examples to examples to support state its purpose even a weak belief with
support your purpose your purpose. Belief and/or provide examples.
and examples could be necessary examples
more clear.
Organization Essay is organized Essay is organized and Essay is somewhat Essay is not organized;
and well-planned planned uses some organized and unclear introduction; no
with transitions transitions between somewhat planned connection between
between introduction, support and uses few introduction, support
introduction, support and conclusion transitions between and conclusion
and conclusion introduction,
support and
conclusion

Language Essay includes Essay provides some Essay provides few There were no examples
several examples of examples of imagery examples of of imagery, figurative
imagery that help that help to illustrate imagery that help to language
illustrate the event, the event, emotions illustrate the event,
emotions and values and values of the emotions and
of the essay essay values of the essay
Conventions/Editing Essay was edited and Essay includes Essay was not Essay was not edited and
including notes from appropriate notes, but edited and errors unable to read.
peer review and some errors are still distract from the
instructor conference present essay

Podcast Recording The speaker reads in The speaker speaks The speaker speaks Podcast not attempted.
a calm voice, calmly, narrator may in a rushed manner,
enunciation is clear pause. stumbles over
and the narration is words.
uninterrupted.

85 (B) total points out of 100.

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