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Madison Stribling

Professor Jon Beadle

English 115

7 December 2017

Self Reflection

When I got my first essay back I was shocked by the average score I earned and even

more so by the grade on the essay that followed. In high school, I took writing seriously and

worked hard on my essays. The feedback I got from teachers showed that they knew I put in the

effort. However, when I came to college it seemed that there were many things I needed to

improve on. Over the course of the semester, I made it my goal to receive a better grade than last.

Shooting for an A grade on an essay that earned a C seemed like a hard goal to achieve so I

settled for better. Based off the feedback I received, I had a hard time following the prompt,

clearing explaining the evidence through analysis, and would use more evidence to support my

claim rather than my own explanation.

When I was given my first essay back, I read the notes, than re-read my essay and saw

something I didn't before. I've previously been told that, as a writer, I have a hard time following

the prompt. Sometimes I would read the prompt and interpret the question in a way that wasn't

intended. After working hard to fix this problem in high school, I was surprised in college that I

was turning back to my old ways. In Project Text, the prompt was to describe how Godzilla has

or hasn't changed form the 1954 original to the 2016 remake and discuss how this is significant.

Right off the back my thesis was unclear leading to my explanations to be confusing and not

fully connected. I ended up changing my thesis from necessary improvement was made on the
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new feature film such as how the monster was awakened, the metaphor it held, and the look of

the creature. (1) to necessary improvement was made on the new feature film. The awakening

of the creature, the metaphor its destruction on humanity holds, and the look was necessary to

edit in order to successfully portray a Godzilla film today's can connect with. (1). By clearly

setting up the background Godzillas metaphor of destruction holds, and writing that the

significance of the change of style was to help the audience connect better with the story line, it

helped set up a more thoughtful analysis on the evidence that followed. I was able to explain in

more detail that Godzillas havoc symbolized the bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki on

Japanese soil. Instead of assuming the reader will already now the correlation of radiation to

Japanese history, I explained further the connection.

However, sometimes when I explain an issue I over under analyze the evidence. As the

writer, I clearly understand the concept i'm trying to get across. When I discuss the evidence I

just used, sometimes my analysis skips the explaining of the information and goes right to why it

matters. For example, when I used the evidence that Zombies are like the internet and the media

and every conversation it comes at us endlessly (and thoughtlessly), and- if we surrender- we

will be overtaken and absorbed. (42) I briefly analyzed the meaning. I mentioned how media is

like a virtual reality that coincides with our reality. We have to be a part of both to understand

whats happening in our world. (2) When I revised my essay, I Integrated and analyzed my

quote to connect more clearly to the argument. Part of my analysis discussed how social media

is a hard realm to stay alive in, but needed to connect with the world...however, it's a problem we

have to fight off if you wish to stay alive in the virtual reality...the monstrosity of this concept is

that you have to push through attacks if you wish to be productive in society. (2). With the
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deeper analysis, I explained the difficulty of social media and how the continuous pulse of

information can lead to people being overwhelmed. However, media has integrated itself so deep

into our working society that it's needed to be apart of if you wish to be productive. Without fully

drawing the connection of the quote, my essay wouldn't have been as strong.

Over the course of the semester, the most difficult writing skill to improve on was using

evidence only when needed. When given a requirement to use evidence, I was overwhelmed and

used more than what was necessary. I feared that I didnt clearly explain the argument, resulting

in me scavenging for more evidence. With the span of the three essays, I worked on finding good

evidence and analyzing it fully. I went from using seven sources in Project Space to using four in

Project Media. When revising Project Space, I recognized that half of the evidence was

redundant. In one paragraph, I used two different sources to explain one issue. Although the two

pieces debated the pros and cons of Twitter, using evidence to explain my thoughts wasn't

needed when I could interpret the issue in my own words. With every essay I wrote, I dwindled

down on my evidence. Project Media, the last essay I wrote, required the writer to use evidence

from two of our assigned readings and one new credible or scholarly source from our own

research. I compared the definition of slavery to the definition of women equality and used a

credible source to prove the term was being used correctly. Instead of using evidence to write my

essay for me, I set up a good intro into the quotes and explained what the definitions meant and

how they relate to each other. As the essay progressed and I started to discuss my main

argument; why women are still oppressed and how it's holding us back, I used Ted Genoways

explanation to help add to it. He writes that fear of the unknown rises fear within us, and if we

give in ...we face the real possibility of the permanent loss of liberty. (130). The loss of liberty
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was the theme of my essay and lead into a great explanation that Men fear their masculinity

being threatened by women who wish to be treated like equals...They fear the unknown, what

they can't control. This has restricted women from truly being free. (4). Evidence is meant to

support your claim, not create it and after practicing on this skill, I was able to successfully do so

in the latest essay.

High School English's sets up good guideline to follow when writing an essay, but

College English helps refine writing skills. When reading a prompt, I now focus more on what its

asking me to write about rather than how I interpret the question. The structure of the essay helps

the audience understand what is being argued and having a clear explanation helps lead the

reader into the direction you want them to go in. It's important not to under or over analyze the

evidence. Likewise, the same goes with using evidence. The writer sets up an argument and

explains it in their own words, but uses evidence to help drive down their position. I've grown to

only use evidence when it's needed to convince the reader of my accusation. My writing has

grown in ways I never expected it to.

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Works Cited

Andrew J. Hoffman. Chuck Klosterman. (2016). My Zombie, Myself: Why Modern Life

Feels Rather Undead. Boston, Massachusetts; Bedford/St. Martins

Andrew J. Hoffman. Ted Genoways. (2016). Here Be Monsters. Boston, Massachusetts;

Bedford/St. Martins

Stribling, Madison. The Creature of The Twitterverse. (2017).

Stribling, Madison. The Match Between 1954 and 2016 Godzilla. (2017).

Stribling, Madison. Were Living in a Mans World. (2017).