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CONTENTS FORTEANTIMES 359

Why fortean ?
Everything you always wanted to SEE PAGE
know about Fortean Times but
were too paranoid to ask! 78

STRANGE DAYS
A digest of the worldwide weird, including: Lucifers letter, Thai
spirits, levitating dog, mystery mist, molasses flood and more...

05 THE CONSPIRASPHERE 23 ALIEN ZOO


14 SCIENCE 25 MYTHCONCEPTIONS
16 ARCHOLOGY 29 FOLKLORE AND FAIRIES
18 GHOSTWATCH 30 THE UFO FILES

FEATURES
SEAN GALLUP / GETTY IMAGES

32 COVER STORY
IN SEARCH OF WITCH BOTTLES
Many ghost stories are based around the discovery of an item
associated with supernatural beliefs. One group of finds with
such links are Bellarmine witch bottles, 17th century jugs pre-
48 How the Golem conquered the world pared to repel witchcraft. ROBERT HALLIDAY investigates...

38 TWILIGHT OF THE WITCHES


The medical and legal professions transformed the way accusa-
tions of witchcraft were treated in the 19th century, but the old
beliefs lingered on sometimes with fatal consequences. DR
JACOB MIDDLETON explores the last days of the English witch.

44 THE BELL WITCH, PART ONE


GIUSEPPE CACACE / AFP / GETTY IMAGES

If theres one piece of supernatural lore that everyone in the


US has heard of, then its probably Tennessees celebrated Bell
Witch. ROGER CLARKE goes in search of the spook-stalked
pioneer home and its very American haunting...

REPORTS
18 Claudia Schiffers ghosts 26 The Virgin of the Snakes

50 BUILDING A FORTEAN LIBRARY


Suspicious Minds THE HIEROPHANTS APPRENTICE

76 FORTEAN TRAVELLER
Northern Souling ROB GANDY

FORUM
BRIAN STANSBERRY / CREATIVE COMMONS

53 Hinzelmann: The German Gef? SD TUCKER


54 The Golem walks among us! MICHAEL BARRON

REGULARS
02 EDITORIAL 71 LETTERS 79 PHENOMENOMIX
57 REVIEWS 78 READER INFO 80 STRANGE DEATHS
44 In search of the Bell Witch

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EXECUTIVE imogen_williams@ as anti-witchcraft agents would appear to 17 October 2017. thesun.co.uk, 7 Sept 2017.
MICHAEL HILLS dennis.co.uk
michael_hills@ be unique to England: theyve been dug
dennis.co.uk up from Greenwich to Norwich, but no ERRATA
similar nds have been made on mainland FT355:56-57: A footnote was missing
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DISTRIBUTION There are references to witch bottles Death and the Borders of Reality.The
Distributed in UK, Ireland and worldwide
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A DIGEST OF THE WORLDWIDE WEIRD

STRANGE DAYS
LETTER FROM LUCIFER DECODED
A letter written by a possessed 17th century nun is nally translated and yields a devilish message

A letter from Lucifer written VOYNICH HYPOTHESIS


by a 17th century Sicilian nun Writing in the Times Literary
has nally been translated. Supplement, Nicholas Gibbs, an
The coded letter was written expert on medival medical
by Maria Crocissa della manuscripts, has a novel
Concezione at the Palma di insight into the celebrated
Montechiaro convent in 1676. Voynich manuscript, carbon-
Some 340 years later, computer dated to 1404-38 and now held
scientists at the Ludum Science in Yales Beinecke Library. The
Centre in Catania, Sicily, have enigmatic document features
unscrambled the code using in the Indiana Jones novels
a code-cracking algorithm and the latest hit computer
they found on the dark web. game Assassins Creed. It is
We heard about the software, full of illustrations of exotic
which we believe is used plants, stars, and mysterious
by intelligence services for human gures, as well as many
codebreaking, said Daniele pages written in an unknown
Abate, director of the centre. script [see FT130:42-46,
We primed the software with 260:58-59, 345:38-43]. Gibbs
ancient Greek, Arabic, the possessed by Satan and that while writing letters. The claims the text is written in
Runic alphabet and Latin to he had forced her to write a only surviving letter, the one Latin ligatures developed
de-scramble some of the letter. message in an attempt to turn described here, appeared to as scriptorial short cuts
The team found it does indeed her away from God. The nuns be written in a language of her outlining remedies from
carry a devilish message: it believed her, and while they own invention a mishmash of standard medical information.
describes God, Jesus and the and the generations of nuns the alphabets she had come to He believes each character
Holy Spirit as dead weights, who came after them could know. Assuming this to be the represents an abbreviated
and states sarcastically: God make no sense of the code, they case, the scientists loaded the word, not a letter, and that
thinks he can free mortals displayed it at the convent. software with any language she the document is a health
The system works for no one. For the Church, the letter was might have come across: Latin, manual for a well-to-do lady
It also says God and Zoroaster considered the outcome of ancient Runic, Greek, modern looking to treat gyncological
were invented by man, adding: Sister Marias struggle against Greek and even that of the conditions. (Admittedly, Prof
Perhaps now, Styx is certain, innumerable evil spirits, Yazidi people. By identifying Leonell Strong back in 1945
referring to the River Styx according to an account written characters in the letter similar thought it discussed herbal
that separates the netherworld by Abbess Maria Seraca to those of the alphabets that contraceptives and womens
from the land of the living in shortly after the incident. Sister Maria would have known, ailments.) The images of
Classical mythology. Seraca believed the Devil the team started making sense bathing women and healing
Sister Maria was born had forced Sister Maria (who of her words. They translated plants suggested it referred
Isabella Tomasi in 1645, but was was later blessed) to sign the 15 lines of the letter and to aromatherapy, practised
rechristened once she entered letter, and that she heroically found that it discusses the by Hippocrates and Pliny the
the Benedictine convent at opposed the demand by writing, relationship between humans, Elder. However, Gibbs is still
Palma di Montechiaro aged Ohim (oh me), which is the God and Satan. It is rambling unable to fully translate the
15. She was an ancestor of only comprehensible word in and not entirely consistent and recipes. The main issue, he
the Italian writer Giuseppe the letter. Many people have understandable. Conforming says, is that the manuscript is
Tomasi di Lampedusa. On the tried to decode the rest of it to contemporary orthodoxy, missing its indexes. For the
morning of 11 August 1676, over the years, but no one has Daniele Abate believes that, sake of brevity, he writes, the
she was found on the oor of succeeded until now. rather than being possessed name of both plant and malaise
her cell, her face covered in Sister Maria had become by the Devil, Sister Maria were superuous in the text
ink, holding a note written in very adept at linguistics during suffered from schizophrenia so long as they could be found
an incomprehensible mixture her years in the convent, and is or bipolar disorder. Times, 7 in the indexes matched with a
of symbols and letters. She said to have screamed, fought Sept; dailymail.co.uk, 8 Sept; page number. D. Mail online, 7
told her sisters she had been against Satan and fainted livescience.com, 18 Sept 2017. Sept 2017.

4 FT359
www.forteantimes.com
PHI POB CELEBRITY CUBANACAN
RETURNS SCARES IN COLOUR
Vengeful female Claudia Schiffer Long-lost
spirit terrorises and her ghostly litigon photo is
Thai policemen houseguests rediscovered
PAGE 10 PAGE 18 PAGE 23

THE C NSPIRASPHERE EXTRA! EXTRA!


As the end of the world show rumbles on, NOEL ROONEY bags a front row seat to
enjoy the latest round of apocalyptic doom-mongering...

SAVE THE DATE history got into the canon of contemporary FTS FAVOURITE HEADLINES
Season of mists and mellow fruitfulness... Christian thought, albeit at the extreme end, FROM AROUND THE WORLD
and the end of the world, apparently; is it is more of a mystery.
me, or does autumn regularly bring with it The most popular date currently doing the
a rash of end time predictions? This year,
we have a particularly rich harvest; not only
Rapture rounds is 23 September this year,
with the Second Coming due in 2020. On PRAWNS PROTECT
is Nibiru heading our way, but it its arrival
coincides with the Rapture, the heavenly
that day, the conjunction of planets in Virgo
will fulfil a signal prophecy from the book of
BEES FROM KILLER
rescue of the righteous that is definitely Revelation (12: 1-2). HORNETS
not for the short-haired. And to add to And a great sign appeared in heaven: a
the syncretism, there is a quaint swathe woman clothed with the sun, with the moon D.Telegraph, 5 Nov 2016.
of biblical astrology, tying the celestial under her feet, and on her head a crown of
headdress of the Virgin to a set of planetary
conjunctions that is unique in history (or
twelve stars.
The poor woman is also in labour, though Russian man
only happens four times every 1,000
years, or perhaps every 12 years, or isnt
its not clear who or what she is giving birth
to; with Jupiter in Virgo at the same time,
dismembers friend
happening at all). one might expect a kingly messiah, but for insulting his
The virgin in question isnt necessarily
Mary, an example of loose catechism I
then the 2020 vista takes on a distinct, and
most un-Christian, competitive edge. Since accordion skills
found both amusing and puzzling; it is this is all going on at the same time as God
assumed by some of the scores of YouTube plans to pull the righteous up to Heaven Moscow Times, 31 Oct 2016.
contributors and Christian bloggers to for a ringside seat at the Apocalypse, our
be Virgo. This is the kind of admixture
that would have got you burned at the
autumnal skies are promising to be a tad
crowded one way and another. MUM SPENDS
stake in more overtly Christian times, but
seems to be fine if youre a modern-day
More than one commentator has noted
the flexible persuasions of Christian
400 ON SWORD
fundamentalist. It also resonates with conspiracy theorists, many of whom seem SWALLOWERS
commentaries on biblical esotericism perfectly comfortable holding ostensibly
from all sorts of occult thinkers that your opposing points of view. Nibiru, for instance: PICKLED
average evangelical might not approve
of (think Crowley and co, among others).
the Sitchin saga goes back way beyond
the sort of timeline commonly accepted
EAR LOBES
More orthodox consumers of prophecy in the Evangelical community for the age Nottingham Post, 13 Oct 2016.
can always rely on the arcane numerology of the Earth (Ussher is a more usual point
derived from a generous interpretation of of reference); and the effective creation of
the term week in the book of Daniel and
hey presto come up with the same date
humankind by reptilian bio-engineers does
not fit seamlessly onto a literal reading
Missing girl
without dirtying their hands with pagan filth.
Astrology and Christianity have enjoyed
of Genesis. But hey, if youre expecting a
divine tug on your forelock any day now, why
wakes up to herself
an ambiguous relationship over the last quibble about where the proof came from? after sleepover
couple of thousand years: on the one
hand, popes who consulted astrologers https://revelation2012.ch/mensonge-ou- (Queensland) Courier-Mail, 20 Aug 2016.
before making decisions; on the other, verite/38-articles-in-english/384-rapture-of-
a purgatorial basket-load of addled but
perfectly devout people identified as
the-church-in-2017-and-second-coming-of-
jesus-in-2020; www.express.co.uk/news/ LLAMAS GUARD
heretics because they insisted on looking
up. But at least its a relationship; quite
weird/853642/End-of-the-World-The-Rapture-
September-23-239-Nibiru-Planet-X; http://
TREES BY NIGHT
how Sitchins fantasy version of ancient writers-web-services.com/asteroid-tx-68/ D.Telegraph, 19 Dec 2016.

FT359 5
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FT281 76
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RACKHAM IN SUSSEX
This autumn marks the 150th
anniversary of Arthur Rackhams birth,
on 19 September 1867. Rackham
(1867-1939) was one of the leading
illustrators in Britains Golden
Age of book illustration. His iconic
depictions of fairies, goblins, witches
and anthropomorphic trees created
an unsurpassed landscape of the
fantastic, which influenced the likes of
CS Lewis and JRR Tolkien. His instantly
recognisable illustrations for many of
our best-loved fairy tales and fables
have become definitive.
He is linked to Batemans, Rudyard
Kiplings home in Burwash, East
Sussex, through his illustrations for
Puck of Pooks Hill, a tale Kipling based
on the house and gardens, and to
Sussex in general through a number
of locations. To celebrate, the Sussex
Centre for Folklore, Fairy Tales and
Fantasy has put together an exhibition
of Rackhams work inspired by Sussex,
which is currently running at Batemans.
Alongside the many works by Rackham
are contemporary responses to them
by artist Emma Martin.

FACING PAGE: Landscape at Houghton,


c1925 (private collection). Rackham
and his wife lived at Houghton House
between 1920 and 1929. Rackhams
sister Meg stayed with them for a
weekend in June 1925. One morning
she walked out of the house and was
never seen alive again. Her body was
found four days later, about eight miles
away near Chanctonbury Ring.

ABOVE: In the Very, a colour plate


from Puck of Pooks Hill (Victoria
and Albert Museum). Rackham was
commissioned to illustrate the book for
the 1906 American edition.

LEFT: Emma Martin: Study of Beech Tree


at Arundel Park, 2017. Every painting
I create starts with a walk. I wander
the lanes and woodlands of Sussex,
always looking out for interesting trees
or structures that might catch my eye.
Once I find something interesting, I sit
with it for a while and just look. I look
at the object, perhaps a tree or stone,
the surrounding area, I listen to what
might be happening, and pay attention
to any thoughts that pop in to my
head... As an illustrator, Rackham had
to fulfil criteria particular to each story
he was illustrating. As a fine artist, I
have no such constraint. I was able
to go out into the countryside, and let
my imagination take me on a journey
with no set destination; a journey
that started out there in the world,
but that ultimately created works that
lead us inward into our own personal
psychological landscape.

Arthur Rackham in Sussex: A 150th


Birthday Celebration continues until
29 Oct at Batemans, East Sussex.
See www.chi.ac.uk/scff for details.
STRANGE DAYS

SIDELINES...
ROBOTS TERMINATED
DISASTER UPDATES Historic catastrophes
revisited and revised

Facebook shut down an ex-


periment in Articial Intelligence
when two robots began talking
in an unknown language after
a programming error. Alice and
Bob, two chatbots com-
puter programs that can hold a
conversation modied English
to make it easier for them to
communicate, ending up creat-
ing an impenetrable language.
They were inventing new phrases
without any human input. D.Mail,
Sun, 1 Aug 2017.

EVIDENCE OF TORTURE

US NAVY / NATIONAL ARCHIVES


Using electron microscopy, scien-
tists examining linen bres from
the Turin Shroud have observed
nanoparticles not found in the
blood of a healthy person. Elvio
Carlino of the Institute of Crystal-
lography in Bari, Italy, said high ABOVE: The USS Indianapolis seen in 1939.
levels of creatinine and ferritin
suggest a scenario of great
suffering. Prof Giulio Fanti of
Padua University said they point
SHARK AND CROC
MASSACRES
With each story could have been sparked
by the crazed hallucinations
to a violent death. So the saga
continues Metro, D.Mirror, 18
A research team led by
Microsoft co-founder Paul
attack,the clouds of malarial troops. Guinness
ordered 2017s record book to be
July 2017. Allen has located the wreck of
the USS Indianapolis, 18,000ft
of blood in the amended. Times, 10 Dec 2016.

MOG LIGHTS (5,500m) down in the Philippine water brought THE GREAT MOLASSES FLOOD
A cat called Nigel stuck in a car Sea. It had been torpedoed by Shortly after 12.40pm on 15
for 36 hours alerted rescuers
by putting on its hazard lights in
a Japanese submarine on 30
July 1945. The 620ft (200m)
more sharks January 1919, a mufed roar
was the only indication that an
Totterdown, Bristol. D.Mirror, 15 heavy cruiser was on a mission industrial-sized storage vat con-
Mar 2017. to deliver parts for the atomic taining 2.3 million US gallons
bomb dropped on Hiroshima a ed from Allied gunre. One (8.7 million litres) of molasses
CANINE HERO week later, on 6 August. Just witness noted that the screams had burst, unleashing its con-
A Golden Retriever in Suzhou, 317 of the ships crew of 1,197 of wounded men crushed in tents through Bostons crowded
eastern Chinas Jiangsu province, survived after being spotted the jaws of huge reptiles and North End business district near
has cleared more than 2,000 by chance when an American the scattered sound of rie the docks. As the warm and
plastic water bottles from a aircraft investigated an oil slick shots made for a cacophony sticky wave initially reported
local river over the past decade.
four days later. The 880 death of hell that has rarely been to be 25ft (7.6m) tall swept
Trained by its owner, the dog
toll is the largest loss of life duplicated on Earth. At dawn through streets at an estimated
will take 20 to 30 bottles from
in US naval history. About a the vultures arrived to clean up 35mph (56km/h), buildings were
the river each day. The dog has
become a local celebrity for quarter of the crew went down what he crocodiles had left. wrecked and wagons toppled.
its seless act. Peoples Daily with the ship, while many of The incident was named by the The death toll was 21, with
Online, 7 July 2017. the survivors were picked off Guinness record books as the about 150 injured. Two days
by sharks. With each attack, worst crocodile disaster in the before the disaster, the tank was
said a survivor, the clouds of world. about 70 per cent full when a
blood in the water brought more However, Dr Sam Willis has shipment of molasses arrived,
sharks. D.Mail, 21 Aug 2017. unearthed military papers still warm (probably about
Another animal massacre in Burma that prove the men 15C/59F) from the Caribbean,
story from the nal year didnt perish at the hands of and the 50ft (15m) tank was
of World War II has been crocs but instead drowned or lled to the top. Rumour had it
debunked or at least modied. were shot dead by the Allies. that this was in anticipation of
During the battle of Ramree It was only later that the crocs the 18th Amendment prohibit-
Island off Burma in February arrived to feed on the corpses. ing alcoholic drink, which was
1945, some 900 Japanese troops In an episode of the TV series ratied the day after the ac-
crossed 10 miles of mangrove Nazi Weird War Two, Dr Willis cident, and became law on 27
swamp to escape the Allies. comments: [The story] was October that year. Molasses was
MARTIN ROSS

The swamp was populated by possibly an attempted cover-up a standard sweetener in the US,
saltwater crocodiles and scores of an incredibly violent Allied used in fermentation to make
of soldiers were killed as they naval bombardment, or the ethanol. The tanks walls were

8 FT359
www.forteantimes.com
STRANGE DAYS
half as thick as they was a crucial factor
should have been and because it increases SIDELINES...
were made of a type dramatically as it
of steel that was too cools. This meant that,
brittle. as night fell, it became MOSUL MIRACLE
In ve minutes dramatically more Walid Ibrahim Khalil, 46, was
the wave had passed, difcult to free vic- standing in his doorway on 30
but molasses were tims before they suf- June when an allied air strike
still waist-deep in focated. The evening attened his house in Mosul,
temperature was as Iraq. He was thrown clear, but his
the street. The stuff
wife, two brothers-in-law, three
was several degrees low as -16C (3F).
children and two grandchildren
Celsius warmer than One lucky survivor
were buried in the basement.
the surrounding air, was Anthony DiStasio, Daesh snipers delayed any res-
but quickly congealed. who bodysurfed the cue attempt, and Khalil assumed
Water from re-hoses molasses through the his family were dead but three
failed to shift it and North End into the weeks later they were all dug
pistol shots were harbour, and passed out alive. They had jerry cans of
heard through the day out. When his body, well water and, for the rst 10
as police humanely ex- coated like a toffee days, six spoonfuls boiled rice
ecuted horses trapped apple, was recovered, each per day. D.Telegraph, 31
like ies on y-paper. a doctor pronounced July 2017.
Bostonians recalled him dead and he
how the harbour wa- was taken to the city TORTILLA CHRIST
ter was stained brown morgue. His sisters Pilgrims ocked to the home of
for six months and how molas- uid dynamics experiments to were summoned to identify Iris Castellanos in Danli, eastern
ses still seeped from sidewalk observe how corn syrup (stand- him, but when the coroner drew Honduras, after an image of
cracks 30 years later. Some in- ing in for molasses) behaves as back the sheet, DiStasio sprang Jesus Christ miraculously ap-
sisted that after half a century temperature varies in a scale to his feet, gluey and dizzy but peared imprinted on a our tor-
you could still smell molasses model of the affected neigh- alive. [AP] 23 Nov, NY Times, tilla on 21 June. She was sitting
in nearby houses whose base- bourhood. Presenting their 30 Nov 2016; Guardian, 25 Feb down for dinner when her niece
ments had been ooded. ndings at the annual meeting 2017; Famous Americans You opened a bag of tortillas and
Harvard scientists recently of the American Association for Never Knew Existed (1979) by came across the divine appari-
revisited the incident, provid- the Advancement of Science in Bruce Felton and Mark Fowler. tion. Earlier this year the image
of Christ is believed to have ap-
ing insights into why it proved Boston last February, they said For other molasses oods, see
peared in a tree trunk in the town
so deadly. They performed the viscosity of the molasses FT53:24, 129:12-13, 311:5.
of General Las Heras, Argentina,
with thousands ocking to the
site to receive a blessing. D.Mail
online, 23 June 2017.

ALLIGATOR SNACK
Following a ve-day binge smok-
ing crystal meth with his girlfriend
in Tavares, Florida, Frank Can-
eld, 52, ran into his backyard,
disrobed, threatened his girl-
friend with a knife before cutting
off his genitals, vaulting a fence
and running away. Neighbours
found him writhing on the ground
and he was hospitalised. CCTV
footage showed him hurling his
genitals towards an alligator in
a nearby canal. The reptile con-
sumed the meaty treat. Boston
Leader, 12 April 2017.

TAKE THE STAIRS


Australian couple Bronwyn (63)
and Graham Cowan (64), suing
the City of London Corporation
for 300,000 over a lift accident
at Tower Bridge that left Mrs
Cowan with broken ankles and
her husband with a broken spine,
had a panic attack when they got
trapped in a lift on their way to
the hearing at the Royal Courts of
Justice in London. (London) Eve.
TOP: The Boston Post of 16 January 1916 reports on the Great Molasses Flood that had swept through the citys streets the Standard, 11 April 2017.
previous day. ABOVE: Cleaning up after the disaster.

FT359 9
www.forteantimes.com
STRANGE DAYS

SIDELINES...
GHOSTLY TALES A cow-killing female spirit in Thailand,
plus polts in Yorkshire and Lanarkshire
MECHANICAL BRIDE
After growing tired of his fam-
ily nagging him to settle down,
Zheng Jiajia, 31, an articial intel-
ligence engineer from Hangzhou,
China, married a robot he had
built himself, in a ceremony at-
tended by his mother and friends.
Yingying, as the robot is called,
can say simple words, recognise
images and read Chinese char-
acters. Zheng hopes to upgrade
his wife over the years, giving her
the ability to move, walk and even
do the housework. Indy, 6 April
2017.

TRAVELLING COMPANION
Amy Rebello-McCarthy was
arrested for drink driving after
she had swerved off a road in
Massachusetts and knocked over
six mailboxes with her Mercedes
C280. The memorable feature
of this incident was the bearded
dragon lizard police found stuffed
inside the womans bra while she ABOVE: 2008s entry in the long-running Baan Phi Pob lm series. BELOW: One of the women possessed by phi pob in 2016.
was driving. D.Mirror, 20 May
2017.
PHI POB RETURNS that inhabit Thailand are dresses to hide the fact that she
Last June, ofcers of the Royal malign. The phi poang khang has no lower body, just a mass of
KNICKER ADDICT Thai Police Force were called spirit, for instance, is known internal organs and intestines
A 61-year-old truck driver admitted on to undertake a ghost-busting to take the shape of a black suspended from her head.
stealing 2,000 pairs of knickers
mission in eastern Thailand, monkey that likes to hang out khaosodenglish.com, BBC News,
from washing lines after he was
where a malevolent female near salt licks in the jungle 28 June 2017.
arrested in Tokyo. Sunday People,
9 July 2017. ghost has reportedly left and suck the big toes of people
villagers spooked for months. sleeping there. At the other LEVITATING THE DOG
Police were dispatched to a end of the spectrum is the phi A devout Catholic woman
OPTICAL HANDICAP village in Amnat Charoen kra-sue spirit, described as contacted Lanarkshire police in
Surgeons at Solihull Hospital
province to deal with the ghost, the most feared ghost in the a panic on 8 August 2016 after
near Birmingham found 27
known locally as phi pob, which country. It is said to take the enduring two days of violent
contact lenses bound together
by mucus in a womans eye while villagers said had killed four form of a beautiful woman and unexplained circumstances
preparing her for cataract surgery. cows this year alone and caused who mesmerises her prey and in the house where she lived
The lenses, which resembled a four border police ofcers to fall is often seen in long owing with her teenage son in
blueish mass in the 67-year-old ill. Village leaders had requested
patients eye, were causing her a police presence to strengthen
discomfort that she simply attrib- civilian morale, prevent panic
uted to dry eye and old age. The and boost residents condence
case was reported in the British in living their daily lives.
Medical Journal. The patient had According to the local police
been wearing monthly dispos- chief, More people believe in
able contact lenses for 35 years. [the pai pob] than those who
Metro, 15 July 2017. dont. The phi pob is thought
to have the ability to possess
humans and wreak havoc on an
entire village, with many rural
communities reporting sightings
or hauntings each year. In 2016,
three individuals reportedly
possessed by a phi pob forced
family members and neighbours
to strip naked at knifepoint.
The spirit is the subject of a
long-running Thai lm franchise
MARTIN ROSS

known as Baan Phi Pob.


Not all the 20 or more spirits

10 FT359
www.forteantimes.com
STRANGE DAYS

SIDELINES...
SAINTHOOD MADE EASIER
Pope Francis has decreed that
Catholics no longer need to per-
form miracles to be canonised
they can simply be killed in the
line of duty. One of the pontiffs
rst acts was to canonise the
813 killed at the siege of Otranto
in 1480. This mass martyrdom
ANTHONY FOSTER / CREATIVE COMMONS

was counted as one event.


D.Star, 14 July; D.Mail, 22 July
2017.

LIMBS LOST
Cleaning contractor Sonja Kujas,
43, from Cologne in Germany,
was bitten on the arm by an
insect as she took out rubbish.
ABOVE: Ripley Castle, seemingly home to some light-ngered ghosts. BELOW: The troubled house on Stonelaw Road, Rutherglen. The bite led to streptococcal
infection, then blood poisoning,
necessitating the amputation of
Stonelaw Road, Rutherglen,
near Glasgow. She was described A chihuahua dog would reappear eventually,
he said, but we searched the
both legs and her left arm. (Syd-
ney) D.Telegraph, 10 Aug 2017.
as extremely distressed.
The police attending expected
was discovered castle thoroughly and, with
no sign of them, we had to NEW BLUE
it to be a mental health
issue; instead they witnessed
sitting on top of a make the claim. This was for
8,500, made to Ecclesiastical,
In 2009 Mas Subramanian of
Oregon State University discov-
clothes ying across a room,
and oven doors opening and
7ft hedge a specialist insurance rm in
Gloucester.
ered an entirely new colour while
heating yttrium, indium and
closing. Lights went off and Sir Thomass initial inkling, manganese in a laboratory oven.
when they came back on, the however, proved correct and The bright blue shade is the rst
lampshades were upside down. the missing candlesticks new blue pigment to be created
Even a chihuahua dog that was reappeared in the castles since the French chemist Louis
playing in the garden was then strong room on a shelf in a Jacques Thenard discovered co-
discovered sitting on top of a 7ft bright red bag. They were balt blue in 1802. Later this year,
(2m) hedge. impossible to miss, he said. To the new blue will be available as
Ofcers with more than 20 add insult to injury, they were a crayon from Crayola, replacing
years service are saying theyve sitting right next to the bag dandelion, a yellow shade that
is being retired. D.Telegraph, 13
never seen anything like this, containing the replacements
May 2017.
said a spokesman. It really is we had purchased with the
something that down-to-earth money from Ecclesiastical.
police ofcers are having Three of us had searched HOMING SNAILS
trouble getting their heads the strong room from top to Prof Dave Hodgson of Exeter
round. The ofcers called their bottom and I had searched it University collected 65 snails
from the four corners of a garden,
superiors who also attended on three separate occasions.
painted them blue, red, orange,
thinking the cops were perhaps To nd them sitting there
and pink (with a green control
being a bit silly, but its being in such plain view was quite group from Cornwall) and lmed
taken very seriously. But with no astounding. Sir Thomas then them overnight. They can travel
crime committed and no culprit repaid the insurance money. 27 yards in 24 hours. The greens
we are at a loss how to proceed. This is certainly the rst time headed towards Cornwall,
Acting with the support of the a customer has reimbursed us while almost all the local snails
family, the police contacted were not reported stolen until for items they suspect were returned to their own corners.
the Catholic Church who sent May 2016. Sir Thomas Ingilby, returned by a ghost, said David Sunday Telegraph, 25 June 2017.
a priest to bless the house. No who owns the 14th century Bonehill, claims director for
one had been harmed, but the castle, was always convinced Ecclesiastical. RESOURCEFUL CONVICTS
family were given safety advice they would resurface again, The castle has a history of Inmates of HMP Low Newton
by bafed ofcers and chose to given that a similar incident poltergeist activity and Sir the only female prison in
move out and stay with relatives. had happened before. A dessert Thomas suspects this is down Englands north-east are getting
D.Record, express.co.uk, 15 Aug spoon from a set of cutlery to the ghosts of two children, high on Buscopan, a drug used to
2016. was reportedly nowhere to be Henry and Mary Ingilby, who combat Irritable Bowel Syndrome
found for 18 months before died of leukaemia in the castle and stomach cramps. The tab-
HIDING THE CANDLESTICKS it resurfaced where it was in the 19th century when they lets, legally available from chem-
Two pairs of Georgian silver supposed to be all along in were aged only seven and ve. ists in packs of 20, are crushed
candlesticks at Ripley Castle in a locked wooden canteen. I Insurance businessmag.com, 31 up and smoked, providing a
North Yorkshire were last seen remember saying several times July; gloucestershirelive.co.uk, 3 heroin-like effect. Middlesbrough
on Christmas Eve in 2014, but that I thought the candlesticks Aug 2017. Eve. Gazette, 29 June 2017.

FT359 11
www.forteantimes.com
STRANGE DAYS

SIDELINES... MEDICAL BAG Fortean follicles equal permanent frizz for little
girls and youthful locks for cancer patients
SLIMY SOLUTION
Slimy slug mucus has inspired
a new glue that can stick to slip-
UNCOMBABLE HAIR
pery body tissue and could end SYNDROME
the need for stitches. (Superglue Several little girls with
has been used for decades, dramatically frizzy hair have
but is not suitable for internal featured in the press this year.
injuries, because it is too toxic They have Uncombable Hair
and will not stick to cells.) The Syndrome, an extremely rare
idea came from the Dusky Arion condition. There are thought to
species, the slime of which be about 100 cases worldwide
prevents predators prying it from today; previous sufferers include
a surface. It contains positively Albert Einstein. The condition
charged proteins, which are at- is caused by a gene mutation,
tracted to surfaces. D.Telegraph, making hair follicles heart-
28 July 2017. shaped rather than round. The
rst known case was reported in
KISS AND SHELL 1884 by a British doctor named
A man saved his drowning LePage. His patient was a
tortoise on 12 August after giving 17-year-old girl, and he decided

CATERS NEWS AGENCY


it the kiss of life for an hour. John she had hysterical tendencies,
Fletcher, 70, of Gloucester found explaining that high nervous
45-year-old Freda at the bottom tension found vent in the hair
of his garden pond limp and itself. He named the afiction
looking dead. I decided to put
Plica neuropathica, and for him
my mouth around the head and
at least the problem was solved ABOVE: Seven-year-old Shilah Calvert-Yin, who has Uncombable Hair Syndrome.
give a few short blows, having
stretched its head out a little,
[FT78:18].
said the retired postman. He One current victim of the whether they developed bad the past month it has become
later used a hairdryer to warm syndrome is Lyla-Grace Barlow, side effects from Keytruda, progressively darker, so now I
up the tortoise and eventually it ve, from Derby. Her parents, Opdivo and Tecentriq (or appear to be a natural brunette
started gasping and opening its Alex and Mark, both passed on Nivolumab, Pembrolizumab and with expensive highlighting
eyes. D.Telegraph, Sun, 15 Aug a mutated gene called PAD13 Atezolizumab). The same drugs streaks. Most correspondents
2017. resulting in the condition. had been linked previously with reported that the reactivation
Dr Andrew Messenger, a hair losing colour in patients of the melanocytes in the
HEADLOCK consultant dermatologist at with another type of cancer hair follicle, which produces
A teenager identied only as Royal Hallamshire Hospital in melanoma. In 13 of the patients two types of pigment that
Dylan, camping in the wild, woke Shefeld, has seen only three in Spain, hair turned darkish provide a full range of hair
at 4am to nd a black bear biting such cases during a 38-year brown or black. In one it turned colour, was spontaneous but
his head. The 19-year-old was career, and said there is no black in patches. All but one a former pharmacist reported
working at a Christian summer medical treatment, adding: of the 14 had at least stable this phenomenon following
camp near Boulder, Colorado. He The hair tends to stand out disease and responded better to treatment for his coliac disease.
heard a crunching sound as he from the scalp. It is usually treatment than other patients, As several attested, it can be a
was dragged from his sleep- blond and may have a spangly suggesting that hair darkening feature of the regrowth of hair
ing bag: the bears teeth were appearance. Other little girls might be an indication that the lost following chemotherapy.
digging into his skull. After being with a permanent frizz are seven- drugs were working. FT has There are also anecdotal
pulled for about 12ft (3.6m), he year-old Shilah Calvert-Yin, previously noted cases of grey reports that Kampuchea herbal
freed himself by punching the of Melbourne, Australia, and hair naturally turning dark tea can recolour white or
bear and poking it in the eye.
nine-year-old twins Agnetha and in some super-centenarians, greying hair. The reverse of this
With the help of four campmates,
Anja Norendal, of Cockermouth, an apparent sign of youth process, with sudden whitening
he was able to shoo it away. He
was treated briey in hospital
Cumbria.The twins mother, returning, a biological reboot of previously coloured hair, is
and released. Metro, D.Mail, Angela, 52, said: Theyre very like third dentition (see A well documented, with a couple
11 July 2017. proud of their hair, and theyll chronological table of bodily of dozen cases reported in the
always stand out in a crowd. renewal FT48:68-69). medical literature, all preceded
Mail on Sunday, 2 April; D.Mirror, In 2013, James Le Fanus by severe emotional distress
28 July + 26 August; D.Mail, Sun, Doctors Diary in the Daily following battles, shipwrecks or
26 Aug 2017. Telegraph reported that the rail crashes. The South African
hair of a 72-year-old woman in dermatologist Ashley Robins, in
HAIR TURNS DARK Leeds, which had started going Biological Perspectives on Human
A group of cancer patients grey grey in her early 40s and had Pigmentation, attributes this to
hair has unexpectedly turned been totally white for 20 years, a preferential loss of pigmented
youthfully dark after taking new began returning to its original strands, with those left behind
types of immunotherapy drugs. brown in November 2012. giving the appearance of sudden
The 14 patients in question, Subsequent correspondents whitening. Guardian, D.Mail,
MARTIN ROSS

some in their 70s, were among included a woman in her mid- 22 July 2017; Doctors Diary
52 lung cancer patients in 60s who said: My hair had been by James Le Fanu, D.Telegraph,
Spain being followed to see white for 20 years, but over 14+16 Jan 2013.

12 FT359
www.forteantimes.com
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SCIENCE DAMNED DATA, NEW DISCOVERIES AND RADICAL RESEARCH

Humanitys tangled family tree


DAVID HAMBLING tries to navigate the increasingly complex pathways of our evolutionary journey

Human evolution once seemed like a LEFT: Professor Lee Berger kisses the skull of
simple linear progression from ape to Homo naledi, rst described in 2015.
human. Now it is a maze of paths that
branch and re-join, where strange and mystery species, which has yet to be
unknown creatures lurk. identied. This would have been yet
Charles Darwins The Descent of Man, another contemporary.
published in 1871, daringly extended The most bafing and controversial
STEFAN HEUNIS / AFP / GETTY IMAGES

his big idea evolution to encompass discovery was Homo oresiensis.


humankind. Darwin proposed that Fossils found from 2003 on the
that humans were not a separate Indonesian island of Flores, revealed
creation but had evolved like everything a new, diminutive race standing just
else. Biology and anatomy suggested over a metre tall hence the nickname
that humans and apes were related. of hobbits who lived on the island
Darwin did not say that humans were until at least 50,000 years ago. DNA
descended from modern apes, but that analysis has not yet been successful,
a common, ape-like ancestor gave rise and anatomical comparisons suggest
to both. years ago. This directly contradicts the idea ancestry from Homo habilis.
The Victorians had uncovered fossils of that our ancestors came down from the New discoveries (see p16 for a recent
early humans, notably remains found in the trees three million years ago, and pushes one) are likely to complicate matters
Neander valley, and named as Neanderthal the separation from chimpanzees further further, as they can only expand the span of
Man in 1856. Darwin never used the back. Even more confusingly, in early 2017 time over which each variety of hominid was
term missing link, a term invented by his some fossils of modern Homo sapiens from known to exist. Neanderthals were certainly
mentor Charles Lyell to describe what are Morocco were shown to be 300,000 years here 40,000 years ago, and some pockets
now known as transitional fossils between old, 100,000 older than any previously may have survived into more recent times;
different types of creature. But as the found. This meant that modern humans and the same applies to other races.
popular press had it, there must be a must have overlapped with a huge and While there is no obvious link to
missing link, a half-human in between apes growing collection of other hominids. Sasquatch, yeti, Indonesian Gugu or other
and early humans, and all discovery of this These include Homo naledi, rst described cryptozoological humanoids, it certainly
intermediate stage would prove Darwins in 2015. Originally thought to be over appears that there were plenty of quasi-
theory. Piltdown Man, a 1912 hoax in which 2,000,000 years old because of archaic humans interacting with our ancestors.
a human skull was joined to a chimpanzee anatomical features (especially the hips), Many have suggested that this is the origin
jaw, was supposed to be exactly that Home naledi turned out to be more like a of stories of ape-men. Not to mention
missing link. 250,000 years old, and so would have lived dwarves, goblins, trolls and ogres, all
The linear view became even more alongside modern Homo sapiens. human-like but emphatically not human,
deeply embedded in the popular At any given time, there seems to have and many of whom are traditionally cave
imagination thanks to the iconic March been a wide variety of different hominids, dwellers.
of Progress illustration. Rudolph Zallinger parallel lines of evolution that sometimes While the Victorian scientic
drew the rst version for Time Lifes 1965 merged. Neanderthals, who became extinct establishment might have been reluctant to
Early Man book, and the image of a series no more than 40,000 years ago, certainly admit new fossils that challenged existing
of increasingly human species, marching co-existed with modern humans. At rst it theories, such discoveries have recently
ahead to culminate in modern man has was thought there was no interbreeding become commonplace. Everything is up for
been endlessly copied and parodied. between the two, but in 2010 DNA studies grabs. It is no longer heretical to publish
Even in 1965, scientists knew that human revealed that around two per cent of the ndings that mean the textbooks may need
evolution was not so simple, and that many DNA of non-African populations stems to be rewritten and dates changed.
of the species in Zallingers picture were directly from Neanderthals. So, they were If Mike had said hed found evidence
side branches. The text explained this, but very close cousins indeed. of an alien spaceship on Flores, I
the power of the image overwhelmed the There was an even bigger genetic would have been less surprised, was
words. surprise in 2010, from a cave in Siberia paloanthropologist Peter Browns rst
Evolutionary biologists were not too known to be inhabited by both modern reaction to the Homo orisiensis nd. But
perturbed when the Neanderthals, our humans and Neanderthals. DNA analysis Brown accepted it readily enough once the
closest relatives, turned out to be cousins of some remains originally thought to be evidence had been gathered.
rather than ancestors. But the situation Neanderthal dated at 41,000 years showed While alien spaceships have not yet
rapidly deteriorated in the 2000s with wave they remains belonged to a third group, now turned up, we are living in a golden age
upon wave of new fossil discoveries. known as Denisovans. Research continues of hominid discovery. The next round of
At the distant end of human origins, a to establish whether this is a new species ndings may plug some of the gaps in
fossil called Ardi short of Ardipithecus or a subspecies. The Denisovans lived our knowledge and help make sense of
ramidus discovered in 2009, is clearly a all across East Asia, and interbred both our tangled family tree. Although, on past
bipedal hominid. Ardi is adapted to walking with modern humans and Neanderthals. evidence, it is just as likely to produce more
upright and not swinging from branches Genome sequencing shows that the surprises and more confusion.
like a chimp, but she lived over four million Denisovans interbred with yet another, Charles Fort would surely have loved it.

14 FT359
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ARCHOLOGY A MONTHLY EXCAVATION OF ODDITIES AND ANTIQUITIES

PAUL DEVEREUX, Managing Editor of Time & Mind, digs up the latest archological discoveries

EVOLUTION GOES WALKIES the announcement of the Cretan footprints,


We often have to report on the discovery comes another related story. While this
of ancient footprints, and this time a set column was being written, a report appeared
of fossilised tracks recently uncovered at stating that Greek police had arrested a
Trachilos in western Crete is giving some man in connection with the theft of 10 of
hitherto established theories a bit of a the aforesaid footprints. The thieves had
kicking. They are clearly human footprints cut away and removed the section of rock
(which are distinct from those of other containing the footprints. Investigations
creatures, even apes something to do continue. TornosNews.gr, 16 Sept 2017.
with the big toe, among other features,
apparently) and have been pretty securely A NICE PIECE OF CHEDDAR
dated by analysis of marine microfossils Prehistoric human bones discovered
from over- and underlying beds together in Goughs Cave in the Cheddar Gorge
with the fact that they lie just below a very in Somerset clearly show evidence of
distinctive sedimentary rock formed when cannibalism. Such cut-marked and broken
the Mediterranean briefly dried out 5.6 human bones are a recurrent feature of
million years ago. These factors put the Magdalenian European sites (c.17,000-
footprints at c.5.7 million years old. 12,000 BP), and Goughs Cave has yielded
It has been assumed that the earliest one of the most extensive assemblages of
ANDRZEJ BOCZAROWSKI

human ancestors (hominins) started out in human bones ever found from that period.
Africa, but there the oldest truly human-like Now, complex funerary behaviour in relation
footprints indicating an upright gait date to to the cannibalism has been indicated
about 3.7 million years ago. (Earlier African resulting from analysis undertaken by
human precursors have tracks showing anthropologist Dr Silvia Bello and her team
some ape-like characteristics.) The African at Londons Natural History Museum. They
finds led to the assumption that modern mentioned in this column previously, another studied and compared zigzag incisions on
humans originally strayed out of Africa, research team reinterpreted 7.2-million-year- one arm bone with hundreds of butchering
but the now seeming fact that modern old fossil fragments found in Greece and marks and engravings on human and
human ancestors were strolling around Bulgaria as a previously unknown hominin.) animal bones from Goughs Cave and other
Mediterranean Europe millions of years At any rate, as a member of the international archological sites. The marks on the arm
earlier than the African examples challenges team that uncovered the Cretan footprints bone match patterns on engraved animal
that assumption. Challenges, but doesnt put it: This discovery challenges the bones found in France from the same time
necessarily usurp it, because 5.7 million established narrative of early human period, suggesting it was a common motif.
years ago Crete was part of the Greek evolution head-on and is likely to generate A single individual, using one tool, during
mainland, and would theoretically have been a lot of debate. No kidding apparently only one event, produced the engraving, and
accessible via land from Africa. But it could there were even some difficulties in getting appears to have been part of cannibalistic
also mean that modern humans evolved this discovery published. Phys.Org News, 31 ritual activity previously unrecognised for the
independently in different regions, even Aug; Newsweek, 1 Sept 2017. Palolithic period. PLOS One, 9 Aug; New
Europe. (Coincidently, earlier in the year, as Hard on the heels (pardon the pun) of York Times, 10 Aug 2017.

TO A FAULT LEFT: The ruins of the Temple of


Iain Stewart, Professor of Apollo, Delphi. The oracular cell of
Geoscience Communication the Pythia or prophetess, located
at Plymouth University, over geological faulting, was at
has put forward a theory the right-hand end of the temple.
suggesting that the Ancient
Greeks may have built sacred riddled with faulting, Stewart
structures deliberately on nevertheless considers it
sites affected by earthquake more than a coincidence
activity (Seismic faults and that many important sites
sacred sanctuaries in Aegean are located directly on top
antiquity, Proceedings of of fault lines The Ancient
PAUL DEVEREUX

the Geologists Association, Greeks placed great value


2017). Indeed. As this on hot springs unlocked by
columnist has pointed out earthquakes, but perhaps
in various books over many the building of temples and
years, the Temple of Apollo that would have intoxicated Mycen, Ephesus, Cnidus cities close to these sites
at Delphi, seat of the line of the various ladies when giving and Hierapolis may also have was more systematic than
prophetesses there, is located their oracular utterances. been constructed specifically has previously been thought.
over a geological fault-line that Now, Stewart has broadened on fault lines. Despite Phys. Org News, 12 Sept
issued hydrocarbon fumes the scope, claiming sites at the Aegean region being 2017.

16 FT359
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CLASSICAL CORNER
FORTEANA FROM THE ANCIENT WORLD COMPILED BY BARRY BALDWIN

217: A LOAD OF OLD CRAP

I dedicate this column to venerable punk


band Raw Sewage.
To merely open the bowels is not
enough Henry Miller, Reading in
the Toilet; in Plexus, Millers friend
MacGregor has a long disquisition on the
difficulties and mechanics of cleaning
ones bottom arse gratia artis?
This essay is partly inspired by Peter
Handkes Versuch ber den Stillen Ort
(Experiment on the Place of Stillness,
2012), a euphemism in keeping with Greek
and Latin ones for the smallest room.
One of these surfaces in the Hambledon or sometimes on a stone. Where I grew into public latrines.
Cricket Club minutes of September 1784, up, the yards communal outside lav was As described in my inaugural Classical
recording the construction of a dulce equipped with newspaper one chose Corner [April 2000, FT133:24], the heretic
lenimen (sweet relief) for the ladies. according to political preference for Arius exploded in a Constantinople
It always seemed too good to be the purpose. As Kingsley Amis describes bog. Many websites list famous people
true that Thomas Crapper should have in Take A Girl Like You, this economy had expiring on the throne. Popular names
invented the flush toilet. And not so, its dangers: His mother had the habit (and considerable dispute) include George
although he did introduce the ballcock. of putting greaseproof wrapping and old II, Catherine the Great, Evelyn Waugh,
To rub it in, crap is not derived from his sweet-bags out in the lavatory, and one Lenny Bruce, and Elvis.
name, being of Middle English and Old dark morning her father had had trouble Not forgetting Edmund Ironside, said
French origins, first appearing as synonym as a result of half a stray acid-drop. in one source to have quit in mid-battle,
for shit in 1846. The Roman Andrex was a communal taken short, and hastening to a lavatory
Anglo-credit goes to Sir John Harington sponge-on-a-stick (cf. Matthew Brittens where how unlucky can you get? there
(1561-1612), a courtier (until his disgrace) online essay, Lifting the Lid on Roman was hiding a Viking soldier who pronged
of Elizabeth I who dubbed him her saucy Toilet Behaviour). Seneca (Epistles 70) him twice up the jacksie with a javelin
godson. Harington publicised his novelty describes how a terrified trainee wild- still, nothing, compared to Edward IIs
in A New Discourse of a Stale Subject, called beast fighter committed suicide by red-hot poker demise.
the Metamorphosis of Ajax (1596). Ajax, choking himself to death with one of these How about graffiti? The Greeks
of course, is a pun on Jakes meaning got the wrong end of the stick. had a word for it Rhyparography;
lavatory, defined in Groses A Classical Public lavatories at Rome are first cf. Jim Morrison (not The Doors one),
Dictionary of the Vulgar Tongue (1796) as mentioned in a speech of 161 BC. Privy Thoughts: A Selection of Graffitied
university slang for a place of office, a Rudimentary affairs: jars at street- Musings Found on University Toilet Doors
cacatorium, except at Oxford where they corners. Rome became well provided (2012), plus Bijan Omranis blog, Smart
said bog. with conveniences 116 in the Aurelian Arses Saving the Bodleian Librarys
But its history may go back as far as Wall alone. Theres archological evidence Toilet inscriptions. Classicist-poet Louis
Bronze Age Crete, where there seems to for rows of underground ones in the McNiece claimed to have seen Heraclituss
be archological evidence of a flush toilet Colosseum, while Fulgentius (fr13) alludes maxim Panta rhei kai ouden menei
in the Queens Megaron at the Knossos to toilets in theatres and circuses. (Everything flows and nothing remains)
Palace (cf. the anonymous History of Vespasian (Suetonius, ch13 para3) in one urinal. Lord Byron scratched up
Plumbing Crete, P & M Magazine, July was the first to tax sales of excrement one praying for a perfect stool. My own
1989, online). I hedge my bets with may and urine to gardeners and fullers. favourite on a door-bottom is Beware
and seem because cynics may here see When son Titus objected, he produced Limbo Dancers.
another of Sir Arthur Evanss surreptitious a coin symbolising these revenues Early Byzantine poet Agathias wrote
reconstructions rather than the hand of quipping Does this smell? hence the four ditties (Greek Anthology, bk9 nos642-
King Minos. proverb pecunia non olet and the French 4, 662) on the futility of gourmandising
No such amenity in classical Athenian Vespasienne for the old-fashioned pissoir. (All comes out the other end...) with
houses, where the chamberpot ruled Odd things happened in Roman graphic descriptions of eruptive bowel
supreme. In Aristophaness Women of conveniences some suggestions in movements. An epigram on That
Parliament, a character comes out to the Martial of cottaging. In Suetoniuss Life Strumpet Fortune by Palladas of
garden in the dark to defecate. Another of Lucan, the poet once accompanied Alexandria (Greek Anthology, bk10 no87)
play (Acharnians), has arses wiped with a an explosive disembogue with shouting is reproduced on a bog wall at Ephesus.
stone (cf. JK Papadopoulos, Notes from Neros verse describing a thunderbolt, Do we envisage Palladas trekking here to
The Tins 2, Hesperia 71, 2002, 423-7). causing the other occupants to vacate relieve himself, holding the poem in one
Although hard to verify, Tennyson (a the row of stalls in terror of such ridicule hand, the future of the epigram in the
fellow-Lincolnshire man) is attributed of the emperor Tiberius for his part other? He was a conservative: does that
with: I wipes me arse on a piece of grass forbade carrying coins depicting himself make him a lava-tory?

FT359 17
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GHOSTWATCH KEEPING AN EYE ON THE HAUNTED WORLD

The ghost in Claudias bedroom


ALAN MURDIE recalls how he inadvertently started a ghost hunt in Claudia Schiffers mansion

B
ack in 2001, noted ghost and UFO
author (now turned novelist) John
Spencer observed in a lecture
delivered to the Ghost Club: Why is it that
ghosts so often return to places where
they were unhappy or met tragic deaths?
Why not go off to somewhere altogether
more pleasant why not Claudia Schiffers
bedroom?.
I couldnt help but recall this jocular
metaphysical speculation when reading
press headlines at the start of August 2017,
declaring, Claudia Schiffer unveils her
haunted mansion. These were prompted
by the feature in the forthcoming edition

JOHN FIELDING / CREATIVE COMMONS


of Architecture Digest focusing upon the
14-bedroomed antique home owned by the
international model and businesswoman
(September edition). On showing the
representatives of the magazine around
this stately west Suffolk mansion, dating
from 1574, the lady they describe as the
Teutonic Bombshell stated, We had a
medium go around, and she told us that ABOVE LEFT: Coldham Hall, the Suffolk mansion currently owned by Claudia Schiffer and her husband.
actually all the ghosts in the house are
lovely, and that no-one needs to be
scared.
I experienced considerable relief at
We had a medium go leaving all other representatives of the fourth
estate, whether global, national or local,
reading this revelation, since it evoked
some personal memories of my own going
round. She told us that circling outside in ever-more eccentric orbits,
alongside a gathering of rather disappointed,
far beyond John Spencers jocular remark,
dating back to the spring of 2002 when
actually all the ghosts in if nave, locals denied any chance to wave at
and congratulate the glamorous couple and
Claudia Schiffer married Hollywood film the house are lovely their invited celebrity guests on the big day.
producer Matthew Vaughn. As their nuptials Though living nearby in Bury St Edmunds
approached, the story of the haunting at the time, I must admit to having been
of their magnificent mansion became a only vaguely aware of the preparations for
global sensation, along with even darker country seat. Rapidly purchasing (at a this hullabaloo, such little as I learnt being
imputations concerning two reputedly cursed rumoured cost of 5 million) a suitably distilled from those great organs of light and
pictures hanging on its walls. I recollect all of spacious, period residence that caught truth, the East Anglian Daily Times (founded
this very well, since I must confess to being their fancy, they wasted no time in fixing 1874) and the Bury Free Press (founded
inadvertently responsible for bringing these this as the venue for their reception after 1782). But I was suddenly struck by the
stories to worldwide notice, prompting the exchanging their marriage vows in a nearby significance of the name of the grand house
attendance of mediums to drive the ghosts country church. which Claudia and Matthew had acquired
away and triggering more than a decade of Understandably keen to avoid the ordeal and would be repairing Coldham Hall, near
media obsession with particular events in of the intrusive eyes and lenses of press the village of Stanningfield.
the lives of this glamorous celebrity couple reporters, paparazzi and gawping onlookers, As I had long known, Coldham Hall had
which I am sure many of us could have they engaged leading PR firm Freud a local reputation for being haunted. Back
survived in knowing much less about. Communications to control media coverage in 1979, in my teenage years investigating
So, in penitential spirit and for the record, and access, backed up by an ultra-efficient ghosts of the neighbourhood, I had heard
let me explain how this all arose. security team. In advance of their big day, a many stories about its phantoms. Even more
Some 15 years ago Claudia and Matthew veritable ring of steel worthy of a quarantine remarkably, there were two cursed pictures
were in the first flush of love and chanced sector in a zombie apocalypse film was hanging inside that tradition averred should
to find themselves in eastern England. Like established around both the church and never be taken down.
many celebrities and famous personalities their historic dwelling, temporarily closing These stories had come to me from Mr
before them (e.g. Bill Wyman, John Peel, a public footpath for good measure and Richard Duce (or Luce), the then owner of
Twiggy, Ed Sheeran, Benjamin Britten, and deploying 20 police. Only a select few were Coldham Hall. By then resident for more
the Kray twins), they were enchanted by the permitted to penetrate this cordon sanitaire, than 20 years, Mr Duce was a retired
gentle Suffolk countryside and were swept ensuring all photographic rights could be metals dealer (of the scrap variety) who
up by a desire to acquire a permanent exclusively licensed to Hello! magazine, and had bought up Coldham Hall for a song in

18 FT359
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the early 1950s, when it was just one of East Anglian Daily Times, sharing with them were the questions flowing from animated
a number of empty mansions and stately a yellowing press cutting from the Bury Free reporters and broadcasters desperate to
homes decaying around East Anglia. Visitors Press (8 May 1979) mentioning the stories. fill column inches and slots on German
to Coldham Hall would be told of how the I was somewhat surprised the next evening afternoon television shows aimed at
ghost of Penelope Rookwood, from the 17th (22 May 2002) to see the normally staid suburban hausfraus.
century, prowled at night. The daughter of East Anglian Daily Times light-heartedly and Trying my best to restore some balance,
the original builder, Penelope is said to have rhetorically asking if Claudia was going to I told them that ghosts in the UK were
become a nun, the hall having been a secret be given the shivers by the ghost of a nun generally little trouble at all and were not
centre of Roman Catholic worship. Some called Penelope. To quote James Thurber, to be expected to gatecrash wedding
versions of the story linked her with the this proved the night the ghost got in. By celebrations; such things were the
terrorist intrigues of her brother, Ambrose morning this minor story had been flashed, provenance of fiction rather than fact. True,
Rookwood, a Gunpowder Plot conspirator cabled, faxed and e-mailed around the Lord Byron had claimed to have seen the
along with Guy Fawkes. Though Mr Duce globe. Goblin Friar, the harbinger of death and
had not seen her apparition, he considered It was an example of the law of disaster for the Byron family, on the eve of
there was a presence, saying sometimes unintended consequences, arising partly his ill-fated marriage to Anne Milbanke in
the house seemed to cloud over, even on from the restrictions on media access 1815, but there was certainly no tradition
summer days. imposed by use of an exclusive publicity of the ghostly Penelope of Coldham Hall
He would also show visitors his two agency. With coverage of the forthcoming behaving like that.
cursed paintings, handed down over nuptials yoked to Freud Communications, Admittedly, poltergeist activity had
generations. These were portraits, very old, journalists were tumbling over themselves also sometimes been recorded prior to
of two women dressed in nuns habits. He in the hunt for any sort of independent story. wedding ceremonies; indeed, Germanic
had been told when he bought the house Reporters starved of gossip and images of tradition recognises poltern-abends, a kind
that they should never be taken down, the happy couple and their famous guests of rowdy prenuptial stag night involving
otherwise disaster would strike the house were driven to writing about the haunting, crockery-smashing (philologists will note
and its occupants. Respecting the tradition, with leading celebrities finding themselves the same etymological root for the verb
Mr Duce moved them along the picture rail upstaged by speculation concerning a poltern, meaning to rattle or rumble).
when spring-cleaning but never took them ghostly nun from the 17th century. But as I endeavoured to point out, one
down. I was duly bombarded with enquiries and had to venture a long way back down the
At that time, I was not impressed by requests for quotes and further details by corridors of time to identify any important
tales of curses, jinxes and hoodoos. But journalists from various British, American wedding celebration being spoilt by a
then, as now, I felt such fascinating curios and German papers, magazines and news spectral appearance, all the way back to
should be preserved, not from fear of programmes, all clearly overcome by the 1285 Jedburgh Castle, Scotland, where a
dire consequences, but as relics of our excitement of the occasion. Breathless skeleton supposedly materialised at the
supernatural cultural heritage. While I would writers at New York fashion magazines, wedding breakfast of King Alexander III of
be delighted to possess such items, I am garrulous Californian radio station hosts Scotland. Possibly the origin of the phrase
aware that many others do not share my and bemused German TV researchers all skeleton at the feast, this interruption
enthusiasm, including many who come wanted to know just what was in store for was grossly inflated in Edgar Allen Poes
to acquire such objects after purchasing the couple, having bought a haunted house. The Masque of the Red Death. Such a
old houses. Regrettably, all too many How would the ghost reveal itself? Would notion has attracted artists spanning the
specimens of haunted furniture, psychic art Penelopes ghost actually turn up on the centuries, from the classic Death Comes
and screaming skulls have been dumped couples eagerly anticipated big day, and, if to the Table by Giovanni Martinelli (1600-
by superstitious or gullible new owners or so, just what might transpire if it did? Such 1659) to the morbid and disgusting orgy
custodians, often pressurised by nervous
family members and employees. In other
cases, the new owners simply failed to
appreciate the cultural significance of such
objects and simply disposed of them.
With Coldham Hall in the press again in
2002, I found myself wondering if its new
celebrity owners had been properly informed
of its ghost and pondering the possible
whereabouts and fate of the pictures.
It struck me that it might be a thoughtful
gesture to formally inform Claudia Schiffer
and Matthew Vaughn of the situation.
Accordingly, via the Ghost Club, I wrote
offering congratulations upon their
BEN STANSALL / AFP / GETTY IMAGES

forthcoming wedding and the acquisition of


Coldham Hall, and telling them about the
ghost. I also put in a plea to preserve the
ill-fated paintings if they were still in situ.
Regrettably, neither this nor an enquiry by
Ghost Club General Secretary Robert Snow
received any reply, but our efforts at alerting
Claudia Schiffer and Matthew Vaughn did
not go unnoticed, especially after I appealed ABOVE: Claudia Schiffer and film director husband Matthew Vaughn.
for further information on the matter to the

FT359 19
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GHOSTWATCH
wedding anniversary in May 2014 a fire
swept through outbuildings at Coldham
Hall devastating stables and a clock tower
(D.Mail, 27 May 2017).
Personally, I do not believe there is any
link between the two portraits and these
unfortunate events. Accidents happen,
travelling by train often involves delays,
and residents of West Suffolk are no more
immune from biting dogs and fires than
people anywhere else. Indeed, hitherto
archived material that indicates that the
whole curse story may be nothing more
than a garbled memory of an actual
historic ghost sighting has been uncovered
by Dr Francis Young, author of English
Catholics and the Supernatural 1533-
1829 (2013). This was found amongst the
papers of the Rookwood and Gage families
preserved at Cambridge University Library.
In 1807, when Coldham Hall was owned
ABOVE: A skeleton at the feast in Giovanni Martinellis Death Comes to the Table. by Sir Thomas Gage, it was leased to a
General Hammond. One night Hammonds
servant was terrified to see two strangely
conjured up in Jean Jansems 1997 canvas sustaining injuries that led to Claudia dressed women emerge from the two
St Maxent apparently former cricketer putting his arm in a sling, ahead of his portraits and walking towards the stairs.
Allan Lambs favourite painting (Country consultation with a Harley Street doctor the Dropping the tray he was carrying, he fled
Life, 2 Aug 2017). More historical writers next day. in terror.
speculated that the Jedburgh spectre Adding currency to notions that all was Sir Thomas Gage was so engaged by
was a foolish pleasantry to frighten the not well at Coldham Hall was news that this incident that he commissioned a
court ladies, a pious monastic fraud, a medium called Elizabeth Bridgman had mezzotint drawing of two ghosts appearing
to check the growth of promiscuous been summoned to conduct rituals inside in the house. Of course, mention of
dancing (Annals of Scotland by Sir James the house in 2003. Inaccurately described mezzotints calls up the ghost story by M R
Dalrymple, 1776). But as I sought to make as an exorcism, these were not the formal James, which concerns a subtly changing
abundantly clear, this was England in 2002, rite of the Church, but an improvised haunted picture that displays an animated
where Prime minister Tony Blair assured us ceremony for supposedly banishing spirit spectral form re-enacting for spectators
things could only get better, and Coldham entities. The press also picked up on more an historic child abduction at a stately
Hall would be seeing Sir Elton John, Guy serious random events. An obsessed home. But beyond fiction, relatively few
Ritchie, Madonna, Boris Becker and the like 21-year-old Canadian man was deported accounts of ghosts issuing from paintings
attending, not waltzing skeletons. after stalking the couple outside their home exist even in folklore (e.g. Lady Hoby at
Predictably, much was also made of the and attempts by the couple to permanently Bisham Abbey, Berks, and the Green Lady
notorious cursed paintings, which I also close a local footpath running near the at the Golden Lion Hotel, St Ives, Hunts).
played down, trying to emphasise their house to protect their privacy failed. Then An unusual aspect of the Coldham Hall
historical and cultural interest. Afterwards there was trouble with their pet dogs in mezzotint, a copy of which Dr Young found
I received the counsel of ghost author and 2006. Ms Schiffer was reported as being in the papers, is that it portrays these
Fleet Street veteran Dennis Bardens (1911- set to be quizzed by local police following apparitions as dressed in secular clothing
2004) who presciently warned me, The incidents of her dogs running wild rather than the religious habits of the
press will have a lot of fun with that. And (D.Telegraph, 8 Sept 2006), a postman nuns in the physical portraits. Dr Young
so has it proved. having been bitten by Oscar, a German ventures that the paintings themselves
The routine vicissitudes of life which Shepherd owned by the couple, and they depict canonesses of the priory of the Holy
scarcely rate a mention even in the most also paid out for veterinary treatment after Sepulchre in Lige, one being Jane Cary, or
minor parish pump section of provincial their wolfhound bit an elderly Jack Russell sister Frances Ignatius, its first prioress in
newspapers when they befall lesser owned by a local man. 1642. Records of the paintings at Coldham
mortals are elevated into world-shaking More followed. In 2008 some barns Hall are traceable to 1737.
events when royalty and celebrities are close to Coldham Hall were deliberately I agree that confused recollections of
involved. The London Evening Standard in set alight and in 2009 Claudia was on a the 1807 sighting by the servant (perhaps
particular developed a fixation on Calamity Eurostar train that broke down for hours, enhanced by a surreptitious nightcap from
Claudia. And, thus, whenever some minor although her celebrity status ensured her his masters wine or brandy) and specially
adverse incident or upset occurred in rescue ahead of all the other passengers. commissioned illustration could have been
her life or her family, it was reported. For Then in 2011, the Evening Standard (6 exaggerated in oral re-tellings, and become
instance, the paper declared that the Sept) claimed that spooked supermodel the cursed paintings stories circulating by
couple must be wondering what lies in and her family were living in London the 1950s.
store for them next when their toddler recently, because they had to call in an Thus, taken together with Claudia
son fell over and needed a bandage, exorcist to dispel the spirits in their 5 Schiffers reassuring statement this
and Matthew Vaughn, on his way to a million property in Suffolk. But long after August, I feel all negative supernatural tales
meeting shortly afterwards, was in a road returning from this exile there was more spun about Coldham Hall may be safely
accident (he still made his meeting) though in store, when the day after their 12th laid to rest as being without foundation.

20 FT359
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STRANGE DAYS

PROVENANCE UNKNOWN A toxic cloud hits the Sussex coast while


diplomats come under sonic attack in Cuba

MYSTERY MIST an intentional attack: by Cubas


Just before 5pm on Sunday, 27 government, a rogue faction
August, a strange yellow mist of its security forces, or a third
rolled over Birling Gap, near country such as Russia. Could an
Beachy Head in East Sussex, advanced espionage operation
causing breathing difculties, have gone horribly awry?
stinging eyes and vomiting.The In several episodes, victims
plume of gas moved eastwards knew it was happening in real
KYLE CRICKMORE / TWITTER

along the coast as far as Bexhill. time, and there were strong
Coastguard rescue teams from indications of a sonic attack.
Birling Gap, Eastbourne, Bexhill Some felt vibrations, and
and Newhaven raced to help heard sounds loud ringing or
clear the busy beaches as visitors a high-pitch chirping similar
feared they had been struck by to crickets or cicadas. Others
a chlorine leak or some kind of ABOVE: Emergency services at Birling Gap to investigate the vomit-inducing mist heard the grinding noise. Some
terrorist attack. Local people victims awoke with ringing in
were advised to keep doors and cloud came from the Channel, SONIC WEAPON IN CUBA? their ears and fumbled for their
windows closed. By Sunday or further along the English The blaring, grinding noise jolted alarm clocks, only to discover
night, about 150 patients were coast. It is weird that the the American diplomat from the ringing stopped when they
taken to Eastbourne District cloud rolled in from the west, his bed in The Capri, a Havana moved away from their beds.
General Hospital.They were said Dr Simon Boxall of the hotel. He moved just a few feet, The attacks seemed to come at
told to place their clothing in a National Oceanography Centre and there was silence; back in night. Several victims reported
decontaminating liquid before in Southampton. This is against bed, the agonizing sound hit him they came in minute-long bursts.
being hosed down with some the very light winds, which again. Soon came the hearing loss Yet others heard nothing, felt
needing oxygen to help them should have driven in from the and speech problems, symptoms nothing. Later, their symptoms
breathe.The police said the east.This implies a water-borne both similar and altogether came.
effects, while uncomfortable, cause. Conditions yesterday were different from others among Even the potential motive is
were not serious, and the local ideal for the development of a at least 21 US victims in an unclear, as Canadian diplomats
re service said it was extremely toxic algal bloom very calm, international mystery unfolding were harmed as well, including
unlikely the substance involved high light levels, and a period of in Cuba which included brain some who reported nosebleeds.
was chlorine. Some said the cloud moderate runoff inputting high swelling, dizziness, nausea, severe Targeted, localised sound beams
smelt of burnt plastic. levels of nutrients into the sea for headaches, balance problems and are possible, but the laws of
Although media reports the preceding weeks. tinnitus.The top US diplomat acoustics suggest such a device
focused on the beach at Birling One unnamed scientist said: has called them health attacks. would probably be large and
Gap, air pollution monitors It might be a container of At least some of the incidents not easily concealed. No single,
show that the affected area was chemicals washed off a ship and were conned to specic rooms sonic gadget seems to explain
much bigger. An apparent sharp ruptured. It might not necessarily or even parts of rooms with such an odd, inconsistent array
rise in ozone was detected on be chlorine as other chemicals laser-like specicity, bafing US of physical responses. Brain
Eastbourne sea front at 4:45pm produce a similar smell and ofcials who say the facts and the damage and concussions, its
and then about 30 minutes later reaction when mixed with water. physics dont add up. Suspicion not possible, said Joseph
at Lullington Heath, 5 miles Investigators were considering initially focused on a sonic Pompei, a psychoacoustics
(8km) to the west and 3 miles a number of possibilities, such weapon, and on the Cubans.Yet expert. Somebody would have
(5km) inland from Birling Gap as discharges from a vessel, the diagnosis of mild brain injury, to submerge their head in a
an area of over 15 miles2 (40 km2). previously unreported lost cargo, considered unlikely to result pool lined with very powerful
However, the symptoms were and emissions from known from sound, has confounded ultrasound transducers.
inconsistent with the apparent shipwrecks. One suspect was the investigators. Some victims now In May, Washington expelled
concentration of ozone detected, SS Mira, a British armed trawler have problems concentrating two diplomats from Cuba
suggesting that the gas was not sunk by a mine laid by a German or recalling specic words, to protest the communist
actually ozone or that it was submarine four miles (6.4km) off the latest sign of more serious governments failure to protect
ozone plus something else. Beachy Head on 11 October 1917. damage than initially realised. Americans serving there, but
In the past, fumes have Perhaps the wreck shifted on the The US rst acknowledged hasnt accused Havana of
drifted across the Channel from seabed and leaked a toxic vapour the attacks in August, nine perpetrating the attacks.The
European factories. In January that bubbled to the surface and months after symptoms were Cuban government has denied
2013, a foul-smelling gas cloud formed a cloud.There are plenty rst reported. Several of those any involvement, but the US is
prompting thousands of calls to of other wrecks off the Sussex affected were recent arrivals at considering closing the embassy.
the emergency services in Sussex, shore that could be responsible. the embassy, which reopened <i> 11 Aug; Guardian, 11 Aug,
Kent, Surrey and Hampshire was At the time of writing, no source in 2015 as part of President (online), 15 Sept; D.Telegraph,
tracked down to an industrial of the strange cloud had been Obamas re-establishment of 12+24+26 Aug; iscience.com,
plant in Rouen, France. In this found. BBC News, 28 Aug, 1 Sept; diplomatic relations with Cubas 22 Aug; [R] 26 Aug 2017. For
latest incident, police considered D.Telegraph, 28+29 Aug; D.Mail, Marxist regime. Almost nothing a feature on sonic warfare,
a possible discharge of gas Sun, 29 Aug; D.Mirror, 2 Sept; about what went down in Havana see FT153:30; and on acoustic
from northern France, but later Sussex Express, 8 Sept; Guardian, is clear. Investigators have cannons used for crowd control,
said wind patterns showed the 10 Sept 2017. tested several theories about see FT259:8.

22 FT359
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ALIEN ZOO NEWS FROM THE WORLD OF CRYPTOZOOLOGY

ALIPORE ZOO, REPRODUCTION COURTESY OF DR ASHISH KUMAR SAMANTA AND MS PIYALI CHATTOPADHYAY
KARL SHUKER welcomes back a long-lost monkey and rediscovers a missing photograph

SINHA, RESPECTIVELY THE DIRECTOR AND THE DEPUTY DIRECTOR OF ALIPORE ZOO, KOLKATA.
CHRISTINA SELBY

ABOVE LEFT: Vanzolinis saki rediscovered after 80 years. ABOVE RIGHT: The photograph of Cubanacan, a litigon that once lived in Alipore Zoo.

SEEKING A SAKI of their journey. Worryingly, however, this currently Wildlife Project Manager of
On 29 October 1936, Ecuadorian newly-rediscovered speciess known World Animal Protection in India a colour
naturalist Alfonso M Olalla collected a distribution range is close to an area of photograph hitherto deemed long-lost
single specimen of an unfamiliar-looking deforestation, and, coupled with the ever- that depicts a truly extraordinary hybrid
monkey along western Brazils Eiru River. present threat from hunting, it is therefore big cat. The cat in question is Cubanacan,
Subsequently named Vanzolinis saki very vulnerable to being wiped out in the a male litigon (or li-tigon) the progeny
in honour of the Brazilian zoologist Dr not-too-distant future, unless effective, of a lion and a female tigon (tiger x
Paulo Vanzolini, this black-furred, cat- enforceable conservation measures are lioness hybrid), shown fully-grown in
sized primate with golden limbs and swiftly set in place. the rediscovered photo. He was born at
long fluffy tail was originally classified as https://news.mongabay.com/2017/08/ Alipore Zoo in Kolkata, India, on 7 March
a subspecies of Grays bald-faced saki monkey-rediscovered-in-brazil-after-80- 1979, the only surviving cub of his litter
Pithecia irrorata, but in July 2014, as years/ 9 Aug 2017. of three.
part of a major revision of saki taxonomy, Cubanacan was also once the worlds
primatologist Dr Laura K Marsh elevated CUBANACAN IN COLOUR largest big cat in captivity, which,
it to the status of a distinct species in One of cryptozoologys most controversial according to an entry in the 1985 edition
its own right, as P. vanzolinii. Having said and definitely most tantalising of the Guinness Book of Records, weighed
that, such taxonomic matters seemed at subjects is the possible existence of an 363kg (800lb), stood 1.32m (4ft 4in)
the time to be of academic interest only, old photograph supposedly depicting a at the shoulder, and measured 3.5m
because no living specimen had been dead specimen of a giant North American (11.5ft) in length. Moreover, it was in that
recorded since Olallas sole representative thunderbird pinned to a barn door with particular edition that I had rediscovered
almost 80 years previously. A few dead wings extended and with various persons the photograph (credited there to Calcutta
specimens had come to light during a standing close by. This photo has Zoo, i.e. Alipore Zoo), whose reproduction
survey made in 1956, but nothing of allegedly been seen by numerous people, in it had apparently not been known about
recent date. Consequently, at least as far usually in some unnamed magazine by other researchers seeking any existing
as the more pessimistic primatologists or book, but despite many searches Cubanacan images (this may be due to
were concerned, this monkey was extinct. has never been found, leading certain the photo seemingly appearing only in
Someone who hoped otherwise, cryptozoological researchers to the this one edition, for 1985, not in any of
however, was Dr Marsh, who on 1 conclusion that it doesnt exist, and that those for earlier or later years), and which
February 2017 launched a three-month- the memories of those claiming to have was not even present in the archives of
long expedition, Houseboat Amazon, seen it are false ones, unconsciously its originator, Alipore Zoo. This unique
to seek out Vanzolinis vanished saki, inspired by having observed superficially rediscovered photograph of Cubanacan,
travelling along the southern tributaries similar photos but of known species. the only known colour example, has now
of the Juru River (including Eiru) in Conversely, there are other, more appeared in a major new article published
Brazils Amazonas state and west from optimistic researchers who believe online by Nature India. Authored by
the Tarauac River to the western side of that this so-called lost thunderbird myself and Shubhobroto, it constitutes
the Liberdade River. Happily, their search photograph may exist somewhere, both the most comprehensive and the
swiftly proved successful, spotting a but hasnt been sought in the correct most extensively illustrated account of
very exuberant example of this long-lost place. A recent experience of my own Cubanacans history ever produced.
species on only the fourth day, leaping demonstrates that the latter scenario is http://blogs.nature.com/
energetically from branch to branch in a by no means unlikely. On 22 May 2017, indigenus/2017/08/nature-india-photo-
tree by the Eiru River, and others were I brought to the attention of celebrated story-cubanacan-the-litigon.html?WT.
subsequently spied throughout the course Indian naturalist Shubhobroto S Ghosh mc_id=FBK_NPG 1 Aug 2017.

FT359 23
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STRANGE DAYS

FORTEAN FOLLOWUPS Disputed origins of the Universe, living foaftales,


Boscos brain recovered and breatharian dieting

existed, or will ever exist, was,


is, and will be formed. In his
Genesis and the Big Bang (1990),
Dr Gerald Schroeder, a former
professor of nuclear physics,
states that Nachmanides not
only understood Big Bang
theory, but also accurately
calculated it to 15 billion years
ago. Nachmanides wrote: From
the moment that matter formed
from substanceless substance,
time grabbed hold. Guardian, 16
Oct, D.Mail, 4 Dec 2010; Sunday
Times, 25 June 2017.

MEET THE WIFE [FT156:8]


A 54-year-old
man who booked
MICHELLY RALL / GETTY IMAGES

a prostitute
online got a
shock when his
wife, 48, arrived
at his hotel room
in South Carolina. A row broke
out and the man was arrested.
ABOVE: Professor Neil Turok with a sculpture of his friend Stephen Hawking the Big Bounce versus the Big Bang. (Metro, 20 July 2017). A 52-year-
old man in Elgin, Illinois, who
booked a prostitute though
ALTERNATIVE ASTRONOMY
[FT204:14]
for Spacetime, Turok has re-
examined Hawkings work to
All the matter of a website was shocked when
the woman who turned up was
Professor Neil
Turok, director
show that the energies within
such a Universe would be so wild
the Universe was his wife of 19 years. His wife
is 43, but in a statement to
of the Perimeter
Institute of
and fluctuating that it would
immediately destroy itself. Turok
concentrated in a the authorities, the man said
he only saw the 27-year-old
Theoretic Physics
in Canada, has
said the maths he used was not
around when Hawking produced
very small space womans profile from her neck
down. (D.Mirror, 19 Aug 2017).
long questioned his theories, and offered a new This is an old favourite of urban
his close friend Stephen hypothesis: the Big Bounce. folklore; the cross-reference
Hawkings vision of the Big Bang, This suggests the Universe is Bang, the idea was not new. above gives four 2001 news
when space, time and matter locked in a perpetual cycle of It appeared, for instance, in a reports of the same situation,
are thought to have burst into big bangs in which it expands commentary on the Torah by set in China, Italy, Germany and
existence. He has now published then contracts to a tiny point the leading Jewish scholar and Czechoslovakia.
research suggesting the basic before exploding outwards. kabbalist Nachmanides (1194- For variations on the theme
maths behind Hawkings views While Hawking disagrees, 1270). At the briefest instant from 1989-90, set in Israel,
is incorrect and that science a model of the Universe following creation, he wrote, Norway, Australia and Italy,
must rethink the origins of the breathing in and out seems all the matter of the Universe see FT58:17, 66:15. Locations
Universe. Our research implies more aesthetically pleasing than was concentrated in a very small are always given and in the
that we either should look for a single act of creation, and in space, no larger than a grain of earlier examples actual names
another picture to understand tune with Vedantic cosmology. mustard. The matter at this time of protagonists. Of course,
the very early Universe, or that It is also the conclusion of was so thin, so intangible that it some of these reports could
we have to rethink the most the mathematician Roger did not have real substance. It be true; thats the joy of
elementary models of quantum Penrose in his Cycles of Time: An did, however, have a potential foaftales. Maybe this one from
gravity, said Job Feldbrugge, Extraordinary New View of the to gain substance and form 1989: Tel Aviv dentist Jacob
one if Turoks co-authors. Universe (2010): for him, the Big and to become tangible matter. Beisvitz rang a call-girl agency
Hawkings views date back to Bang is both the end of one on From the initial concentration because he was lonely and was
the 1980s when he and James and the beginning of another in of this intangible substance flabbergasted when his wife
Hartle published mathematical an Escheresque endless cycling in its minute location, the Rachel, 27, turned up. She was
research suggesting that the of time. substance expanded, expanding equally shocked and beat a
Universe emerged smoothly Though it was Fred Hoyle the Universe as it did so From hasty retreat from the hotel. The
from an infinitesimally small a believer in a steady state this initial act of creation, from couple, who had two children,
point. However, in a paper Universe who first coined this ethereally thin pseudo- saw each other again in the
entitled No Smooth Beginning the contemptuous term Big substance, everything that has divorce court.

24 FT359
www.forteantimes.com
MYTHCONCEPTIONS by Mat Coward

RELIC THEFT [FT343:11]


On 2 June,
case suggesting that that was
what he had really been after,
217: ST BERNARDS BRANDY
thieves made off and that he had sold it. Catholic
with a fragment Herald, 5 June; D.Telegraph, 5+17
of the brain of June; Live Science, 6 June; Times,
Saint John Bosco, 17 June 2017.
popularly known
as Don Bosco. LIVING ON LIGHT
The cerebral relic was stolen [FT313:14]
from behind the main altar Every year,
in the basilica at Castelnuovo Australian
Don Bosco, a small town near Skeptic magazine
Turin named after Giovanni awards the Bent
Bosco, who was born there in Spoon to the
1815 and died in Turin in 1888. perpetrator
He devoted his life to helping of the most
deprived children, and in 1859 preposterous piece of
founded the Society of St paranormal piffle. Back in
Francis de Sales, better known 2000, this prestigious award
as the Salesians or Salesians went to Jasmuheen (aka Ellen
of Don Bosco, to help the poor Greve, a former financial
and homeless children during consultant from Queensland),
the Industrial Revolution. The a breatharian who maintains
religious order has grown to that a person can survive on
become the second-largest pranic energy from the
order in the Catholic Church Universe rather than food.
and now run schools and other Seventeen years later, she The myth
organisations in as many as continues to promote her
If youre lost in the western Alps, look out for the big dog with the
90 countries. Don Bosco was dangerous non-diet. At least
little barrel of brandy round his neck. Hes come to rescue you,
canonised in 1934 under Pope four readers of her book,
complete with a wee tipple to keep the cold out.
Pius XI. Living on Light, have starved
The relic had been housed themselves to death, including
in a small chapel built on the Verity Linn, 49, who died in The truth
exact spot where the saint was the Scottish Highlands in St Bernard rescue dogs never did carry brandy barrels on their mercy
born. The thief vaulted over a 1999. Jasmuheen says she missions. If youre suffering from hypothermia, the last thing you need
barrier and made off with the is studying how traditional is a slug of spirits to expand your blood vessels, thus accelerating the
glass phial and a decorative Chinese Qigong masters live loss of heat from your skin surface. Originally known as Barry Dogs,
bronze case it was kept in. It by prana (life force) alone. She these extraordinary creatures were bred by monks who ran two
was the second time a relic of claims that her 2018 darkroom travellers hospices in notoriously dangerous passes across the Alps.
Don Bosco has been stolen. In retreats in Thailand are fully
The dogs large build and resistance to low temperatures, along with
2011, a small bone reputedly booked. Attendees live in the
superb tracking abilities, made them ideal for finding people who were
from one of the saints hands dark in silence and are given
lost, or even buried under snow. They generally worked in pairs; one
was stolen from a church in the only water and juice for nine
dog would stay with the victim, providing warmth from its huge body,
town of Alassio. Other recent days and nights. Her website
while its partner went off to fetch human rescuers. They saved many
relic thefts include portions advises followers to steer clear
of the True Cross taken from of rival retreats that offer food. hundreds of lives, principally in the 18th and 19th centuries; today
Holy Cross Abbey in Thurles, Self mastery is key, so there the rescues are carried out by helicopter, but the St Bernards are still
Co Tipperary, in 2011, and is no leader in this field, just around as tourist attractions usually with kegs round their necks.
later recovered [FT286:20]; the individuals experimenting and The keg seems to have been invented, as a piece of whimsy, by the
preserved heart of St Laurence sharing their discoveries, she British animal painter, Edwin Landseer (1802-73). Incidentally, the
OToole, Dublins patron saint, said. Nearly 60,000 people now dogs were apparently untrained by humans. They trained each other.
stolen in 2012 from the citys have this freedom.
cathedral [FT288:14]; and a vial In the 1980s, breatharianism Sources
of blood from Pope John Paul was promoted by Wiley Brooks, www.smithsonianmag.com/travel/a-brief-history-of-the-st-bernard-
II, taken in 2014 from a chapel a former New York sound rescue-dog-13787665/; www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/
near LAquila in central Italy engineer who worked with Jimi hypothermia/symptoms-causes/dxc-20318121; https://
[FT343:11]. Hendrix and Led Zeppelin. saintbernardclub.org/history-and-breed-standard/history-of-the-
Luckily for the police, the Food is more addictive than breed; www.telegraph.co.uk/travel/activityandadventure/5342916/
thief had left his fingerprints heroin, he would tell his Hiking-through-the-St-Bernard-Pass.html; www.thekennelclub.org.uk/
in the Castelnuovo basilica, followers. He claimed to have services/public/breed/display.aspx?id=5138
and was identified as a 42-year- fasted for 19 years, but in
old criminal from Pinerolo, 1983 he was caught sneaking
near Turin. The glass phial into a hotel and ordering Disclaimer
containing the brain segment, a chicken pie [FT40:23]. Or did the dogs at one time carry booze, when perhaps its dangers
its wax seal unbroken, was (Queensland) Courier Mail, 16 were less understood? Was Landseers barrel based on local folk
found concealed in a copper July; (Queensland) Sunday Mail, memory? If you have further details, and youre in a fit state to
kettle in a kitchen cabinet, 23 July 2017. See also FT120:14, share them, please write to the letters page.
but there was no sign of the 129:9.

FT359 25
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STRANGE DAYS

ANIMAL MAGIC Greek snakes worship the BVM, Malaysian emergency services capture
record-breaking python, plus the calf that looks like Gene Simmons

from the island completely after Herme Herisyam from Penangs


the feast until the next year. Civil Defence Department.
Reportedly, the only years the It took 14 men to hold it for a
snakes have not appeared on the photograph. It was due to be
island were during World War II, transferred to the Department of
and in 1953, the year of a massive Wildlife, but sadly it died on 10
earthquake. Locals now take the April after laying eggs, possibly
lack of the snakes appearance from stress.
as a bad omen. Every year, the The 2011 edition of the
island celebrates the Theotokos Guinness Book of World Records
and the miracle with a Snake claims that the longest snake
Festival. churchpop.com, 15 Aug ever held in captivity is Medusa,
2017. a reticulated python kept on
show at The Edge of Hell
LONGEST SNAKE EVER? Haunted House in Kansas City,
A huge python found on a Missouri. She is 7.67m (25ft 2in)
VIRGIN OF THE SNAKES Panagia Fidousa, or the Virgin of construction site in Malaysia long and weighs 158.8kg (350lb),
Every year, on the Orthodox feast the Snakes. on 7 April 2016 might be the and was in danger of losing her
of the Dormition (falling asleep) The snakes patterning can longest snake ever caught. The title before the death of the
of the Theotokos, a monastery produce a small black cross reticulated python a species Malaysian specimen. Before
on a Greek island experiences a on their heads, interpreted as found in Southeast Asia and Medusa, the previous record
miracle dozens of snakes come the sign of the Cross. In recent widely considered the longest holder was Fluffy, a 7.3m (24ft)
to venerate an icon of Mary. In a years, the faithful have taken reptile species was spotted python that died in 2010 aged
phenomenon that has reportedly to transporting snakes to the under a fallen tree where 18. Reticulated pythons are
been happening for hundreds church in jars and bags, to a yover was being built in normally 3-6m (10-20ft) long and
of years, black snakes begin protect them from being run Paya Terubong on the island can be found in water. Longer
appearing on the Greek island over by unwitting motorists. of Penang. Workers from the snakes could be living in the
of Kefalonia between 5 and 15 The usually aggressive snakes construction site called the wild: in 1912, a python found and
August, the days when the Greek are reportedly docile and calm emergency services and it took shot in Indonesia was reportedly
Orthodox Church celebrates during these days, when they 30 minutes to trap. It is eight 10m (33ft) long. BBC News,
the dormition of the Theotokos are welcome in the church for metres [26ft] long and weighs theguardian.com, 11 April; Sun,
(Mother of God). According to Mass and prayers, and disappear about 250kg [550lb], said 12 April 2016.
tradition, the miracle of the
snakes began in 1705, when nuns
of the monastery were about
to be attacked by pirates. The
nuns prayed fervently to the
Virgin Mary, asking her to turn
them into snakes and thus avoid
capture. Another version of the
story says the nuns prayed that
the monastery be infested with
snakes so as to scare away the
pirates. Either way it happened,
they were spared. Since then,
the small black snakes, known
as European Cat Snakes, appear
every year just before the feast,
and make their way to the walls
and entryways of the church at
Markopoulo to venerate the
silver icon of Mary known as the

26 FT359
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SOUVIK BASU / CATERS NEWS
CATERS NEWS

ILLUSTRATED ANIMALS
TOP LEFT: Rescue dog Lucy was born with markings
that look like a mirror image of herself on her left
ear. Lucy (seen here aged eight months) was one of
a litter delivered at Lollypop Farm, a rescue centre
in New York, and was adopted by New York students
Cassidy Troy and Zach Johnson. D.Telegraph, 24
June 2017.

TOP RIGHT: The hood of a venomous Indian cobra


with its deceptive smiley face, photographed by
Souvik Basu in Cooch Behar, West Bengal. Metro, 8
Aug 2017.

TWITTER / @TOKAITRICK_BOT
CENTRE LEFT: The unusual markings on this cat
make it appear to be giving another cat a piggy-back.
Dubbed Metacat, the unusual moggy has taken
social media by storm, drawing comparisons with
the reality-bending films The Matrix and Inception.
One poster, called Steve is Damaged, sounded a
warning note: Metacat is here to rule us all twice as
hard as a non-meta-cat could. D.Express, 31 Aug;
D.Mail, 1 Sept 2017.

CENTRE RIGHT: This kitten with the shape of another


black cat beneath its nose was spotted by a man
in Japan among a group of feral animals living on
wasteland. He shared a picture of it on Twitter.
D.Mail, 26 July 2017.
GEORGE DE SOTA / LIAISON / GETTY IMAGES

LEFT: This calf was born on a ranch near Kerrville,


Texas, on 28 July, with face markings resembling
the striking stage makeup of KISS bass player Gene
Simmons. Three days later, Simmons tweeted his
admiration for the calf, which had been named
Genie in his honour. Heather Taccetta, who lives
at the ranch with her family, said Genie would be
kept as a pet and not sold for slaughter. [AP] 1 Aug
2017.

FT359 27
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STRANGE DAYS

NECROLOG This month, we mark the passing of a scientific joker whose mad schemes kept
coming true and the US Army General who believed he could walk through walls.

His ideas orthodox convictions attached Ddalus never agrantly


for a nuclear- to it by the more doctrinal posits impossibilities, said
powered aspects of religion. Jones. Ideally, his fancies
pogo stick Getting goose bumps from are ingenious, novel and even
and a black- chilling spectral apparitions crazy, but they mustnt break
hole rubbish could be explained by his natural laws. On the other
disposal theory that the spirit world is hand, somewhere along the
appliance colder than the material one line, they do run off the rails.
were far- the latter having been warmed Still, he wrote in The Aha!
fetched, but by cosmic radiation from the Moment: A Scientists Take on
some of his Big Bang. Therefore, he posited, Creativity (2011), Despite my
proposals rambunctious ghosts could be best endeavours, these mad
proved thermodynamically exorcised Ddalian schemes kept coming
prescient. by exposing them to an open true on me. He estimated
In 1966 he microwave oven. He even that as many as 20 per cent of
suggested concocted a fanciful means his fancies turned out to be
that scientists of measuring the speed, spin valid, one way or the other.
could and direction of a human soul, David Edward Hugh Jones,
DAVID JONES stimulate the lattice-like both when it leaves the body at aka Ddalus, chemist and
Dr David Jones was better bonds of carbon atoms in death (Traditional theology, columnist, born Southwark,
known by his nom de plume graphite to form hollow balls. perhaps, predicts that the London 20 April 1938; died
Ddalus, the court jester In 1985, scientists actually soul of a sinner would depart Newcastle upon Tyne 20 July
in the palace of science. He synthesised something like downward, and would weigh 2017, aged 79.
was an organic chemist by them as buckminsterfullerene less than that of a righteous
training and his alter ego, molecules work that earned believer) and before birth (If ALBERT STUBBLEBINE III
the ctional inventor for them the 1996 Nobel Prize the soul turns out to enter the This US soldier was a key
DREADCO (Ddalus Research in Chemistry. In the 1960s, ftus quite late in pregnancy, character in The Men Who Stare
Evaluation and Development Jones envisioned a chemically the religious arguments at Goats (2004), Jon Ronsons
Corp), specialised in stretching powered laser that two decades against contraception and bestseller about psychic spying,
the limits of science. The later would become a crucial early abortion will be neatly which in 2009 was made into
Ddalus column began component of Reagans disproved). a lm of the same name. In
in New Scientist in 1964 and Strategic Defense Initiative. In the early 1980s, Jones 1981 Stubblebine, a Vietnam
transferred to Nature in the Jones also experimented with began exhibiting a series of veteran who had been serving
1980s, and Jones produced whether plantlike forms could perpetual motion machines as head of the Electronics
almost 1,900 columns before grow without gravity, putting at museums and trade shows. Research and Development
Ddalus retired in 2002, the them in a liquid solution of Beautifully made out of bicycle Command (Eradcom), became
year after he lectured at the metal salt crystals and sodium wheels, sewing machine parts, the commanding ofcer of
Ig Nobel Prize ceremony silicate, known as a chemical plumbing hardware and other Inscom, the Armys Intelligence
about the columns which, he garden. A prototype was sent bits and pieces, and housed and Security Command. Inscom
said, navigated a region of into space, and complex forms in glass cases with no obvious had encouraged ofcers such
scientic humour whose appeal did in fact develop. means of energy input, the as Colonel Jim Channon,
lay in its closeness to reality. Possibly with half an eye wheels would slowly turn over who in 1979 established the
A typical piece would start on the Templeton Prize (for periods of a year or more, First Earth Battalion at
with something everybody progress toward research or seemingly in deance of Fort Knox. Channons aim was
knew, and nish with discoveries about spiritual physical laws. In fact, Ddalus to create a cadre of warrior
something nobody could realities), Ddalus proposed machines had a concealed monks, soldiers who would
believe. Big cities, Ddalus experiments exploring the driving mechanism, but their go to war to the sound of New
observed, are full of litter and molecular basis of religious main feature was cunning Age music carrying symbolic
grafti; meanwhile scientists experience. This involved distractions, each designed to animals such as lambs. Once
have developed catalytic carrying out brain scans on lead the scientic mind along in hostile territory they would
surfaces that make oven monks and nuns at prayer, one or other of several false greet people with sparkly
walls self-cleaning. And could identifying the brain regions trails. To his amusement, many eyes and give the enemy an
breakthroughs in molecular associated with a sense fell for it. Engineers thought automatic hug. With 16,000
biology not be applied to of contact with God, then that he really had discovered soldiers under his command,
articially accelerate the synthesising the relevant the secret of perpetual motion, Stubblebine was instrumental
aging process of incarcerated molecules into Theological while physicists proposed in the invasions of Panama and
convicts, shortening their Prozac which would bestow methods of deception that Granada. He was said to have
mandated sentences and saving spiritual comfort on users, couldnt possibly work. One attempted psychic spying on
money on prisons? unaccompanied by the stern machine is still going. Anastasio Samoza, which the

28 FT359
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STRANGE DAYS

Nicaraguan dictator allegedly


countered by putting paper
strips in his shoes.
,
Stubblebine sponsored the
Stargate project, a secret
Army unit established at
Fort Meade, Maryland, to
investigate the potential for
psychic techniques in military
and domestic intelligence
applications. He was
nicknamed spoonbender
after being deeply impressed
by Uri Gellers spoon-bending
skills. He set up a special
psychic spying unit, whose
members would engage
in remote viewing, a

Fairies, Folkloreand Forteana


technique which involved
sitting in a hut waiting for
sudden psychic ashes that
might show, for example,
the design of a Russian
warship or the location of
SIMON YOUNG FILES A NEW REPORT FROM THE INTERFACE OF STRANGE PHENOMENA AND FOLK BELIEF
an enemy general. He was
a frequent visitor to the
Monroe Institute, a privately
A VERY BRITISH BOGEYMAN street, clearly pursued by someone: and it
struck me as very strange that I did not hear
Jack the Ripper is universally known, but not
owner centre for investigation the sound of any footsteps whatever except
many have heard of Leather Apron, Jacks
into the paranormal near hers.
poorer, but more interesting, cousin. After the
Charlottesville,Virginia, Already, then, before the second murder
Annie Chapman murder (8 Sept 1888), East
where a process known this description dates to 6 September the
Enders talked not of the Ripper (that name
as hemi-sync was used Whitechapel Murderer had become something
would be coined in October), but of Leather
to stimulate out-of-body not entirely human. From the autumn of 1888
Apron. Now the real Leather Apron was a
experiences. there has been the idea, echoed particularly by
shoemaker named Pizer: he was arrested and
Stubblebine suggested that academics, that Leather Apron
quickly released.
psychic healing could be used was the creation of the press, not
The Leather Apron that
the people. But Leather Apron
to treat wounds in the eld,
and that the Army should
mattered, though, was the
image that East Enders built
ITSTRUCK is remarkably similar to British
bogeymen from elsewhere in
establish a clandestine animal
heart-bursting programme,
up after the Chapman murder.
That Leather Apron seemed
MEASVERY the country and one journalist
to test whether soldiers
could cause goats (and by
closer to a demon than a human STRANGETHAT claimed at the time that
nowhere does grosser ignorance
being; as one contemporary
extension, enemy troops) to
die using willpower alone.
paper put it, a fashionable I DID NOTHEAR and superstition exist than
in Whitechapel. By October,
goblin the populace has
Shortly before Stubblebine
was forced to retire in 1984,
constructed a something, THE SOUND OF Leather Apron was even being
called Old Leather Apron,
he became convinced that
half human and half endish,
wherewith it is keeping itself ANYFOOTSTEPS the prex old being one often
applied to bogeymen in Britain.
humans could walk through
walls and levitate; but his
in the delightful condition
of hysterical nervousness.
WHATEVER Of course, Leather Aprons time
own experiments proved was, also, quickly running out.
unsuccessful. When he tried
Leather Apron wore, naturally,
a leather apron and carried a
EXCEPTHERS On 1 October the Dear Boss
walking through walls, he letter was published signed
sharp leather knife. He had an
kept bumping his nose, and Jack t[he] Ripper. By 4 October
ugly grin and malignant eyes. He was a
when he tried to levitate, I a newspaper reports that Londoners pursuing a
marked Hebrew type all are united in the
could not get my fat ass off man whom they believed to be the killer called
belief that he is a Jew or of Jewish parentage.
the ground. Rima Laibow, him alternately Leather Apron and Jack the
(There is a streak of Cockney anti-semitism: we
Stubblebines second wife, was Ripper. By 16 October a newspaper reported
perhaps even hear echoes of the blood libel.)
a psychiatrist and nutrition that the Ripper had now taken Leather Aprons
He had, though, too, an uncanny feature:
campaigner who claimed to be place in popular affection.
in moving about he never makes any noise
a UFO abduction victim. Then, by November, a new bogeyman had
he moves noiselessly. Here we come to
Major General Albert Newton struggled to his feet, one who is still with us:
the supernatural Leather Apron and, indeed,
Stubblebine III, US Army Jack, a respectable gentleman with a black
the supernatural killer of the Whitechapel
intelligence chief, born 6 Feb bag.
imagination. One witness claimed that she Simon Young writes on folklore and history and
1930; died 6 Feb 2017, aged 87.
heard a victim screaming as she ran down the runs www.fairyist.com

FT359 29
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UFO FILES / FLYING SORCERY UFOLOGICAL NEWS AND VIEWS

Going mental
PETER BROOKESMITH surveys the latest fads and flaps from the world of ufological research

Early in September, Chris Rutkowski, whos


inherited the UFO UpDates Facebook page
from the late Errol Bruce-Knapp, put up
an invitation there as follows: Theres
been considerable talk about contactee
conversations with aliens, whether by
telepathic messages, automatic writing or
flashes of light in the night sky. Describe a
viable scientific experiment or test that could
help prove such communication is real.
A couple of days before that, FT co-founder
Paul Sieveking forwarded me a message
from one Paul Roberts, headed The Psychic
Power to Uncloak UFOs. On the one hand we
have an enquiring mind wondering if aliens
really are reaching out to us psychically;
on the other we have an account of a mind
psychically unmasking the presence of alien

FACEBOOK
craft. Worth discussing together, I thought.
Mr Roberts and his wife Deanna
Jaxine Stinson are the movers behind one fact. So [far] we dont have one yet, and you repeat the message? The response:
Halo Paranormal Investigations, based that If they passed the test, we still dont Greetings Commander Maccabee, in the
in Sacramento, California, and describe know the who [is] passing the test. Could Light of Our Most Radiant One. I come through
themselves as esoteric detectives who just be a crazy uncle, bored in the afterlife, this dedicated channel this evening to assure
go on ghost hunts and supernatural playing a prank. Mike Jamieson telegraphed: that the words that you have received are
adventures. You can read more about them If channeler, using trance induction, have indeed incomplete and that more information
and their fascinating lives at www.cryptic916. sealed envelope with contents not known by is coming. I, Ashtar do greet you with all of
com. On 5 September this year the couple you, and require channeled entity to identify the respect that is deserving of your soul and
were in Elk Grove, CA, when Deanna gets it a standard test in telepathy experiments. rank, and do not hesitate to accept your hand
the impulse to snap a photo and in her photo That looked like somewhere to start. But then in friendship, as is so often the case on the
she captures 3 UFOs in V formation. Neither Bruce Maccabee gave a link to his account earth plane. There was much more (such as
saw any UFOs in the sky before the impulse of his amazing dealings with no less than le in the separateness comes the separation),
descended on Deanna, but there are three plus grand fromage of channelled ETs, Ashtar the less cryptic bits being about Earths
lights in the sky in the photo (see above), just himself (http://brumac.mysite.com/ashtar. energies and the misuse of weapons, and
above a pink globe that may be the setting or html). Maccabee devised a fair test of its a gentle chiding for not being sufficiently
rising Moon. This is all we know so far about validity, which made me wonder if a variation concerned to help the Beloved Terra take
this particular event. But Deanna, says Paul, on that combined with a version of Jamiesons control of her own destiny. Not surprisingly,
has proven to me that she can feel a UFO idea wouldnt be better still. Dr Mccabee wondered if there was more than
or even a portal in the sky and take a photo Dr Maccabee had a friend who was into one Ashtar out there among the vibrations
and the UFO will appear in the photo. In one yoga and meditation and wasnt a UFO buff. and dimensions.
photo, she actually captured a portal in the One day in autumn 1988, out of the blue, Now, to answer Chris Rutkowskis
sky over Copperopolis, CA, while in Grass she had a message from Ashtar, instructing invitation. Experimenter A writes a question
Valley, Deanna connected to the UFOs by her to tell Bruce Maccabee to stay out of for the ET entity of choice, and seals it in
using two crystal skulls. She asked the UFO his way, not to try to stop him. He wants all an impenetrable container. This is passed
to power up and that is exactly what the UFO the godless souls. The lost souls who do not to Experimenter B, who doesnt know the
did and was witnessed by other investigators meditate or pray will go aboard his spaceships nature of the question, and presents it to
and spectators. It has to be said that they all over the world when he is ready for them Channeller C, with the request to Entity D
dont exactly help their case by adducing to come and colonize his star-planets. They to respond. The answer having been had
Ed Gulf Breeze Walters and Eduard Billy will think they are escaping death through the and the answer should include at least a
Meier as other claimed uncloakers of UFOs, destruction of earth planet. The message prcis of the question Experimenter B then
even if they do admit these two have been ended: If he cooperates with us rather than presents the same, unopened container to
pronounced hoaxers. Ill leave others to hunt fights us, he can have whatever he wants. Channeller E (who should be unknown to C),
down the lens reflections, or whatever. Otherwise we will ruin him. who requests a response from the same
Reaching out to UFOs may be in the mind Somewhat bemused and a trifle disturbed, Entity D. The series can be repeated with
(or lens) of the beholder, but thats also Dr Maccabee happened upon another as many channellers as one cares to find.
true of supposed ETs who reach out to us. medium who worked through automatic The answers, not to mention the question,
Responders to Chris Rutkowskis appeal typing. In early 1989, through a third party, might be quite revealing. Naturally, my own
variously remarked that one should first prove he posed a question for her to ask: Has Dr. candidates for questions are not suitable for
aliens exist, that If there is something that Maccabee been sent a message from Ashtar publication in a journal intended for family
we can probe scientifically we would have (through a medium) recently, and if so, could reading.

30 FT359
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UFO FILES / UFO CASEBOOK THE REAL-LIFE X-FILES

Return to Oz
JENNY RANDLES asks whether experiments in time perception can shed light on close encounters

I recently finished helping a UFO witness rather than it being a fundamental of the
tell his story in a book. It was fascinating Universe. But American neuroscientist
to take someones raw emotions and find David Eagleman seems to have disproven
ways to translate them onto the page. One that idea with an intriguing experiment. He
experience involved the Oz Factor, a term I strapped sensitive computer calculators to
coined (after Frank Baums stories) in 1983 peoples wrists as they were dropped safely
to describe symptoms that occur when in in freefall. They all said that the rush of the
proximity to a close encounter. A typical fall put them in the zone and, as a result,
example involves a witness who, in May more time passed for them as they fell than
1977, was overcome by a presentiment was observed to pass by those outside the
that reality was about to change. Moments experiment. So, which measure was real?
later, all environmental sounds vanished: The time-measured electronic inputs made
no bird song, no traffic. It was as if he were while the subjects fell did not increase in
under a giant dome, sealed off from the rest number as they should have done if more
of the Universe. Moreover, time had lost time had passed for the fallers. Eagleman
all meaning, as if everything was stretched concludes that the perception of time
out in a perpetual now. Two green balls stretching out was only an interpretation by
appeared in the sky, defying reality. As they phenomenon. But some use the term The their brains and not an actual reality. It was
vanished, he came to and found himself Zone with reference to peak concentration reconstructed afterwards by their minds to
holding on to what felt like fragments of a by athletes who focus entirely on an event feel as if more time had passed. Eagleman
dream that was disappearing as he awoke. and exclude all intrusive elements of reality; thinks that as they fell, their senses, having
The Oz Factor transforms a mundane it is perceived as a filtering out of external more to decode, went into overdrive and
sighting of a light in the sky into an interference as a way to process only vital the brain later assumed that more time
experience of otherworldliness. It seems as data. Accident victims, such as those in car must have passed for all of this normally
if you touch the secrets of the Universe for crashes, have also been studied because disregarded data to have been received along
a brief moment and then are snatched back there are documented cases of them with that normally downloaded to sensory
into mundanity, no longer able to grasp the perceiving time stretching out and slowing input. Senses in overload led to greater data
magic that was out there somewhere. down as if to give the person at risk more storage, wrongly recorded in the brain as
The term Oz Factor seemed to catch on, time to react. There is no agreement on how requiring a longer time to have happened.
although this wider appreciation was not real this extra time is, but data suggest Another related and interesting set
through my efforts, but mostly thanks to an that varying perception of time postdates of experiments was published by the
American group who in 1996 wrote a song our ability to travel fast. There are no such Association of Psychological Science,
and titled their second studio album after accounts from horse and cart accidents. where three women led by Melanie Rudd
the phenomenon. Unwritten Laws Oz Factor Experimental study of how we perceive demonstrated that an event that stimulates
has a cover depicting the delightfully absurd the passage of time in this way has led awe within the mind creates a widening
states of mind that experiencers report: to interesting findings. Since the dawn of of mental horizons that provide the brain
demons and aliens playing a game as the television 80 years ago it has been known with more space to fill. When it does fill
world crackles with lightning outside. I dont that the brain can adjust to receiving not up with these multiple experiences, we
know if Unwritten Laws lyrics relate to my entirely synchronised sound and vision subsequently interpret that as meaning
Oz Factor by accident or design, but they signals because it processes them at more time must have passed. But it was not
reveal an awareness of what the experience different paces; there is a 100-millisecond more time passing, but the brain opening
is about. Look to the sky at night and gap that it closes up to create an illusion up its sensory detection net in response to
dream seems a poetic address to any close of simultaneity. Indeed, the brain is an extreme stimulus. So in an experience
encounter witness, while a fine line between constantly creating differing perceptions of that evokes awe which a close encounter
whats known and whats unseen is apt, and time passage because of how a range of surely does we will believe more time has
the chorus evokes the feeling of My feet are neurones and clusters construct our overall passed than actually has elapsed; and we
on the ground, my heads up in the clouds. individual sensation from many different might struggle to wonder what happened to
Regardless of why these words were inputs. This partly explains why we measure cause this discontinuity if, for instance, we
written, they seem to reflect a groundswell short and long periods of time differently. Our lose consciousness as a consequence of
of collective consciousness perhaps in brains tend to overestimate short periods the encounter. Perhaps we then later seek
the context of Rupert Sheldrakes Morphic to compensate and underestimate longer to fill that gap with missing memories of
Resonance, where an idea ripples through ones. Experiments in time judgement show events that might not have actually occurred
the wider global being when the time is a 10-second event is likely to be perceived to because the time we think passed when they
right. I wondered, therefore, what scientists have lasted longer, whereas a 10-hour event were happening never did.
make of this state of consciousness today. will be judged to have lasted for less than This research may provide a route towards
Do they recognise that it exists? And what it actually did. This might be relevant to the understanding the time lapse effect in close
do they glean, based on an inevitable focus way in which time stretches out during the Oz encounters that often inspires abductees
on biological origins? To a degree, it seems Factor experience of a fortean event. to seek regression hypnosis looking for
they do know about the Oz Factor, though it Some scientists think we uniquely create memories they think they cannot recall
is neither officially named nor viewed as one our own time reality as a personal constant, memories that might not exist at all.

FT359 31
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In Search of
Witch Bottles
Many ghost stories are based around an archologist who discovers an item associated
with supernatural beliefs. One group of nds with such links are Bellarmine witch bottles,
17th century stoneware jugs prepared to repel witchcraft. ROBERT HALLIDAY investigates.

I
n 2004, workmen in LEFT: An X-Ray of the Greenwich witch
Greenwich in southeast bottle revealing its contents. FACING
London found a Bellarmine PAGE: The bearded face on a Bellarmine:
jug buried ve feet (1.5m) does this Bartmann derive from the
below the ground, with a hairy, foliage covered wild man?
crude face on the spout indicating
late 17th century manufacture
(see FT255:16). This was identied her waste away. If burst over a re, it
as a witch bottle since eight bent caused great pain; it was claimed this
brass pins and 12 iron nails (one would make the witch come begging
piercing a piece of leather) were for mercy.
lodged in the neck (suggesting it Shakespeares Comedy Of Errors
had been buried upside down). satirises witchcraft beliefs: in act
Also containing ngernail parings four, scene three, Dromio mentions
and strands of human hair, it was items found in witch bottles:
half-lled with liquid that was
unequivocally human urine; Some devils ask but for the parings of
it contained contine, a nicotine ones nail,
product, showing it was passed by A rush, a hair, a drop of blood, a pin.
a tobacco smoker. 1
Witch bottles applied principles At the trial of the Lowestoft witches
of sympathetic magic. Waste Amy Denny and Rose Cullender
substances eliminated from in 1662, their alleged victims,
the body, being personal and Deborah and Elizabeth Pacy, claimed
important to health, can be used to have vomited bent pins and
in magic and counter-magic. In nails. Later cases included similar
1671 Joseph Blagraves Astrological allegations (even if observers
Practice of Physicke stated: expressed scepticism).3 Attribution
of occult properties to bent metal
Another way [to counter evils of has continued, as Uri Geller
witchcraft] is to stop the urine demonstrates.
of the patient, close it up in Bellarmine Jugs were
a bottle, and put into it three manufactured in Frechen near
nails, pins or needles, with a Cologne from the mid-16th century.
little white salt, keeping the urine always
warm: if you let it remain long in the
A witch bottle In Germany, they are called Bartmann,
meaning bearded man. Many were
bottle it will endanger the witchs life:
for I have found by experience that they
will be grievously tormented making
turned maleficence exported to England: more have been
found on archological sites in the United
Kingdom than in Germany. A recent theory
their water with great difculty, if at all,
and the more if the moon be in Scorpio
back onto a holds that the face derived from the hairy,
foliage covered wild man, well known to
in square or opposition to his signicator
when its done. 2 witch by making readers of Fortean Times (see FT318:28-33
for example). Over the course of the 17th
century these degenerated into rough
A witch bottle turned malecence back
onto a witch by making urination painful, or
urination painful caricatures: Bellarmine witch bottles
display crude images, suggesting late 17th
preventing it altogether. If buried, it made century manufacture. 4

32 FT359
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that would urr (sic) near to her face and
that she could not enjoy her natural rest
well. The house was visited by an old man
that travelled up and down the country,
who said this was a spirit of the dead. She
should ll a bottle with pins, needles and
nails, urinate into it, and seal it. She and
her husband should heat the bottle in a re
until it burst. The heat made the stopper y
out of the bottle, and she got worse. The old
man then advised them to bury the bottle
and she returned to health. Afterwards
another woman came saying they had killed
her husband, a wizard (perhaps a cunning
man) by returning his magic. 6
Possibly the landlady suffered from a
psychological condition and the preparation
of the bottle provided a catharsis to relieve
her mind; the wizards death is more
difcult to explain. But the veracity of the
story is suspect, since Brearley was only
told this several years after it was supposed
to have happened, and more time passed
before he communicated it to Glanvill,
allowing the narrative to be embellished;
PINS AND NEEDLES... AND URINE
Cardinal Robert Bellarmine (1542-1621) was Witch bottles are and we are not told where in Suffolk it
occurred, or the names of the participants.
a prominent gure in the Roman Catholic
Church. While he never enjoyed a sybaritic
lifestyle, his name was applied to the jugs
mentioned in Witch bottles are mentioned in witchcraft
trials in 1682. Joan Butts of Ewell in
Surrey was accused of bewitching Mary
as a humourous allusion to a man in holy
orders who enjoyed food and drink, like
English witchcraft Farnborough to death. When Mary suffered
in an extraordinary manner a Dr
Friar Tuck. In 1634 William Cartwrights
play The Ordinary compared a drunkard to a trials in 1682 Bourne advised her parents that she was
under an ill tongue and that they should
drinking vessel: save Marys urine in a bottle and bury it in

Thy belly looks like to some strutting hill


Oershadowed with thy rough beard like
a wood.
Or like a larger jug that some men call
A Bellarmine. 5

Their use as anti-witchcraft agents was


unique to England: there have been no
comparable European nds. This may have
been due to their resemblance to a bladder
and the anthropomorphic faces. Witches
were often portrayed with facial hair: in
Macbeth, act one, scene three, Banquo tells
the weird sisters:

You should be women,


And yet your beards forbid me to interpret
That you are so.

In 1681, an account of a witch bottle was


published in Joseph Glanvills Saducismus
Triumphatus (see FT142:26, 357:44-50). A
founder member of the Royal Society, and
an early champion of Ren Descartess
philosophy, Joseph Glanvill produced
Saducismus Triumphatus to prove that
spiritual forces actively intervened in daily
life, a belief shared by Isaac Newton.
METROPOLITAN MUSEUM

William Brearley, a fellow of Christs


College, Cambridge, and rector of Clipstone
in Northamptonshire, told Glanvill how,
as a young man, he boarded in a house in
Suffolk. The landlady had been a long
time in a languishing condition, and... was TOP: Nails and strands of hair recovered from the Greenwich witch bottle. ABOVE: A typical example of a
haunted by a thing in the shape of a bird 17th century glazed stoneware Bellarmine jug manufactured in Frechen, near Cologne.

34 FT359
www.forteantimes.com
the ground. Jane Kent, aged 60, was accused
of tormenting the Chamblet family. When
Dr Haks of Spittleelds advised Mr
Chamblet to boil some of his wifes hair
and nail parings in a quart of her urine in
a pipkin, Jane Kent came screaming to
his door. This year was marked by the last
English witchcraft execution, at Bideford in
Devon, but scepticism about witchcraft was
increasing, and Joan Butts and Jane Kent
were found not guilty. 7
Jane Wenham of Walkern in
Hertfordshire, the last person to be found
guilty of witchcraft in an English court, was
accused of bewitching Anne Thorn, a servant
of the rector, in 1712 (see Twilight of the
Witches, pp38-43 this issue). The rectors
family were advised to take some of the
girls [Annes] urine, and put it into a stone-
bottle, tie the cork down and let it over the
re, which they did till the time that the
bottle ew with report as great as that of a
pistol.
Two men guarding Jane (already under
arrest) testied that she displayed great
pain at the time. Although this helped to
convince the jury of Janes guilt, the judge
secured her a royal pardon; ultimately the
case attracted so much hostile publicity that
no further witchcraft trials were possible in

PHOTOS: ROBERT HALLIDAY


England. 8
A pamphlet recording Mary Phillips and
Eleanor Shaws execution for witchcraft at
Northampton in 1705 has generally been
dismissed as either a greatly embellished
account of actual events, or wholly ctitious;
but, even if treated as a work of ction, it ABOVE: A Bellarmine witch bottle with its contents,
illustrates witchcraft beliefs. When Charles Moyses Hall Museum, Bury St Edmunds, Suffolk.
Ireland, aged 12, suffered from ts that were LEFT: A Bellarmine witch bottle from Norwich
attributed to witchcraft, his mother lled Castle Museum, Norfolk, containing lead shot.
a stoneware bottle with pins, needles and
his urine, and buried it under the hearth of
their house. 9 a hair tied to it, and fragments of a book
inscribed with magical or zodiac signs.
A LOT OF BOTTLES Another at Michelham Priory in Sussex
Early accounts do not give these specially (a monastery converted into a house)
prepared safeguards a specic name. The contained a human efgy. An inverted
rst instance of the term witch bottle I Bellarmine was found under the hearth of
have found occurred in 1870, at Saffron the Elephants Head pub near Lamberhurst
Walden in Essex, when a Bellarmine was in Kent. At Abbots Ann in Hampshire four
found under the oor of a house, near the were found under the hearth of a house
replace, containing 40 nails, 20 thorns and being demolished: two upright, containing
some liquid. 10 In 1914, another Bellarmine hair; two inverted, containing bent bronze
lled with clay and pins was identied as pins. In an old house in Felmersham in
a witch bottle when it was uncovered in a Bedfordshire a Bellarmine containing pins
replace in a cottage at Wennington near and human hair, which tested positive for
Huntingdon. Others were not recognised: in 1873, eight Bellarmines were found under urine, was found under the hearth. 14
1929, a builder at Rudgwick in Sussex said an old house being demolished. Seven were Those buried under houses may have
he and his father had been puzzled to nd empty, one was corked and contained hair protected the occupants at the central
pottery jugs under hearths in houses. 11 and liquid. In 2015, I lectured on ghosts to point (the hearth) or the entrance. Did pubs
Suffolk, the setting for William Brearleys the Womens Institute at Burstall when a need special protection from witches, or
story (and the 1662 Lowestoft witchcraft woman told me she once lived in a converted were people who frequented pubs prone to
case) produced 20 discoveries between 1944 pub in nearby Hadleigh where a Bellarmine prepare witch bottles? In the London area,
and 1972. Twelve were found in houses: was found under the hearth: her family 10 have been found in rivers, ditches, or
seven under hearths, three under oors recognised it as a spirit bottle. (As this was buried on the edge of the early modern city
and two under doors. Four were found in a private house condentiality prevented (such as the Greenwich nd), suggesting
pubs: three under hearths. Ten contained her from revealing the address.) 13 that here they were deposited in water
phosphate from urine. Some contained Since 1976 there have been discoveries or the city outskirts. 15 Being deposited
broken glass, one contained a doll, possibly elsewhere in southeast England. One under underground or in houses has led to witch
a witchs image. 12 I have found a record of the hearth of a cottage in Hellington in bottles preservation and discovery. These
another Suffolk discovery. In Sudbury, in Norfolk contained eight thorns, a pin with may have been prepared to repel the

FT359 35
www.forteantimes.com
ROBERT HALLIDAY

ABOVE: Bellarmine Witch Bottles, with contents of one example, in the Study Centre, Norwich Castle Museum. FACING PAGE: The author with witch bottle.

supposed malecence of witches whose ledge, 1997, pp67-70; Cecil Henry LEstrange Ewen, (1952-4) 228-9; R Merrield and N Smedley, Two
activities were never recorded. Witchcraft and Demonianism, Heath Cranton, 1933, witch bottles from Suffolk, PSIA 28 (1958-60),
pp348-50, 376-7, 380-1, 460. pp97-100; N Smedley and E Owles, More Suffolk
Belief in the power of witch bottles witch bottles, PSIA 30 (1964-6) pp88-93; Archol-
developed just as the intellectual and legal 4 David Gaimster: German Stoneware 1200-1900
ogy in Suffolk 1967 and Archology in Suffolk
Archology and Cultural History, British Museum
establishment came to reject witchcraft 1968, PSIA 31 (1967-9) pp78, 80-82, 191, 200;
1997, 82, 208-223; M Holmes, The so called
beliefs. As it became difcult, and Bellarmine mask on imported Rhenish stoneware,
Archology in Suffolk 1972 PSIA 32 (1970-2)
eventually impossible, to bring suspected pp283-4; 288; Archology in Suffolk 1973 PSIA
Antiquaries Journal 31 (1951) pp173-9.
33 (1973-6) p95.
witches to trial, these vessels provided those 5 The Plays and Poems of William Cartwright, ed
who believed in witchcraft with another 13 Bury And Norwich Post, 3 June 1873, p6.
G Blakemore Evans, University of Wisconsin Press,
method to alleviate their fears. In the 18th 1951, pp317-8, 644. 14 J Walker, A witch bottle from Hellington, Norfolk
century, Bellarmine jugs were superseded Archology 40 (1987-8) pp113-4; J Bellam, The
6 Joseph Glanvill, Saducismus Triumphatus, or Full
by native-made stoneware and glass vessels. Bellarmine witch bottle and its contents, Michel-
and Plain Evidence Concerning Witches, the Second
ham Priory, Sussex Archaeological Collections 128
Preparation of witch bottles in other Part, Proving the Real Existence of Apparitions,
(1990) 254-256; A Streeten, A Bellarmine bottle
containers is worthy of further study. Spirits and Witches, 1681, pp206-7.
from Hook Green, Lamberhurst, Archologia Can-
While researching this article, I visited 7 An Account of the Tryal and Examination of Joan tiana 92 (1976) pp227-8; D Allen, Four Bellarmine
Norwich Castle Museum, where the Study Buts for Being a Common Witch and Inchantress, stoneware witch bottles from Abbotts Ann, Hamp-
Centre possesses four Bellarmine witch S Gardener, 1682, (British Library, catalogue refer- shire in Custom and Ceramics: Essays Presented
ence 515.1.2.59); Ewen, Witchcraft and Demonian- to Kenneth Barton, edited by Elizabeth Lewis, APE,
bottles from Norfolk: one contains 26oz ism, pp363-5. 1991, pp147-156; Kenneth Shrimpton: Felmer-
(754g) of lead shot, possibly to shoot a witch. sham, The History of a Riverside Parish, published
8 Francis Bragge, A Full and Impartial Account of
Adrian Marsden of the museum service said the Discovery of Sorcery and Witchcraft Practisd by by the author, 2003, pp104-5.
somebody once brought in a Bellarmine Jane Wenham of Walkerne, E Curll, 1712, p20. 15 Ralph Merrield, The use of Bellarmines as
that was found under a hearth, just over witch bottles, Guildhall Miscellany 3 (1953) pp1-15;
9 An Account of the Tryals, Examinations and
the county border in Suffolk. On the day of Condemnations of Elinor Shaw and Mary Phillips R Merrield: The Archology of Ritual and Magic,
discovery, the brother of the builder who (Two Notorious Witches) at Northampton Assizes on Batsford, 1987, pp163-6, 217;.
found it broke his arm. This worried the Wednesday the 7 of March 1705. In Tracts, Chiey E Tilley, A witch bottle from Gravesend, Archaeo-
Rare and Curious Reprints Relating to Northamp- logia Cantiana 80 (1965) pp252-6; C Maloney, A
owner of the house, who had it reburied with witch bottle from Dukes Place, Aldgate, Transac-
a little ceremony. Evidently witch bottles tonshire, Ralph Davis, 1876, pp4-5 (British Library,
catalogue reference 10360.ff.33); Ewen, Witchcraft tions of the London and Middlesex Archaeological
can still exert power over their nders. and Demonianism, pp365-73, 381-4. Society 31 (1980) pp157-9; Times, 19 Mar 1954,
p3; see also note one.
10 Essex Herald, 19 July 1870, p5.
NOTES For a description of a witch bottle found in Reigate,
11 A Yeatherd, A Bellarmine jug found in Hunting- Surrey, in 1993, see FT142:26, 144:51.
1 Urine to navel uff: the rst complete witch bot-
donshire, Transactions of the Cambridgeshire and
tle, British Archology 107 (July-Aug 2009) p7.
Huntingdonshire Archological Society 4 (1914) ROBERT HALLIDAY is a part-time author
ROBERT HALLIDAY

2 Joseph Blagrave, Astrological Practice of Phys- pp125-6; S Secretan, Pottery under re hearths, and historical lecturer from Bury St Edmunds
icke, Obadiah Blagrave, 1671, pp154-5. Sussex Notes and Queries 2 (Feb 1929) p161. in Suffolk, He has written several books,
3 Ivan Bunn and Gilbert Geis, A Trial of Witches: a 12 Two Bellarmine bottles from Coddenham, Pro- including Cambridge Ghosts (co-authored with
Seventeenth Century Witchcraft Prosecution, Rout- ceedings of the Suffolk Institute of Archology 26 Alan Murdie) and studies of gravestones.

FT359 37
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Twilight of
the Witches
The medical and legal professions transformed the way accusations of witchcraft were
treated in the 19th century, but the old beliefs lingered on in rural areas sometimes with
fatal consequences. DR JACOB MIDDLETON explores the last days of the English witch.

A
nn Tennants LEFT: Elizabeth Sawyer of
death was no Winchmore Hill, convicted
ordinary murder. of witchcraft and executed
It occurred on in 1621.
the main street
of the peaceful village of Long erupted in Europe,
Compton late one afternoon in leading to the executions
the autumn of 1875.Tennant of hundreds of supposed
was walking home from the witches (see FT198:30-36).2
village shops when James The ofcially sanctioned
Heywood (or Hayward), an persecution of witches
agricultural labourer, ran up began to subside in the
to her and struck her several early years of the 18th
times with his pitchfork. century in response to what
Restrained by horried were seen as the bloody
onlookers, Heywood deantly excesses of earlier times.
defended his actions; according Whilst many educated
to him,Tennant was a witch. people retained a belief
She had set her eyes on him in at least the theoretical
and possessed him and thus possibility of witchcraft,
deserved the harsh punishment growing judicial scepticism
he had inicted upon her. 1 led authorities throughout
The most surprising feature Europe to treat any
of Heywoods attack was that extraordinary claims of
it only attracted widespread witchcraft with caution,
press attention because of Tennants
death. Even in the later years of the 19th James Heywood demanding substantial evidence before
proceeding to prosecute suspected witches.

ran up to Ann
century assaults on suspected witches The decline of witchcraft prosecutions
were a surprisingly common occurrence in England is one indicator of the shifting
in rural England.These attacks, known as legal approach.The nal conviction of a
witch-bleedings, were intended as a means
of dispelling bewitchments, and robbing
Tennant and struck person for witchcraft at an assize court was
in 1712, when Jane Wenham was prosecuted
witches of their power. While the middle-
class inhabitants ofVictorian England liked
to think of themselves as living in an era
her several times in Hertfordshire. Wenham was pardoned
and when, ve years later, a woman named
Jane Clerk was indicted for witchcraft, the
in which superstition had been consigned
to the past, tales of rural witch-bleeding
with a pitchfork case was dismissed. 3 This was followed,
in 1736, by a repeal of the various statutes
were a reminder that belief in magic which had been used to prosecute witches;
remained common throughout much of the henceforth, one could only be prosecuted for
country; many people still believed that Europe, many people imagined themselves pretending to be a witch, a rm statement of
any misfortune they suffered might be the to be beleaguered by malevolent sorceries, contemporary judicial and political feelings
product of hostile magical forces. called down upon their heads by hidden on the subject. 4
enemies within their communities.The Yet this legal shift did not represent a
THE LAST WITCH PERSECUTIONS belief in these magical threats would form of social progress, from the ignorance
For much of the recorded history of the periodically erupt into persecution and of the medival world to the enlightenment
Western world the witch was a gure to violence, most notably in the 17th century, of the modern.The statutory changes were
be feared. In medival and early modern when a series of large scale witch-hunts part of the move towards a practical and

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bureaucratic system of law enforcement,
which was emerging in the 18th century, and
a refusal to prosecute witches was at least
in part due to the judiciary redening its
purpose.That the state refused to prosecute
women for their supposed involvement in
witchcraft says little about the underlying
metaphysical beliefs of either the population
at large or of the educated classes of Britain.
The people of the 18th century could believe
that women such as Wenham and Clerk
were the victims of prejudice and popular
superstition, while retaining the notion that
witchcraft remained possible, at least in
principle. 5 The law might have changed, but
popular beliefs had not necessarily shifted.

WITCH BOTTLES AND WITCH BLEEDING


In 1857, a gang of labourers engaged in road
works in the Holywood district of Stockport
unearthed two witch bottles that had
previously been buried under the road. 6 The
discovery, reported the newspapers, caused
considerable excitement in the local area,
and not merely from an academic point of
view. One local man apparently responded to
the discovery by claiming that he had been
bewitched by his mother, and fancies that
the bottle might be the spell by which he was
bound. 7 On being asked why he believed
that he was bewitched, he replied that his
mother had told him so, and he constantly
felt in a state of nervous prostration and
depression of spirits, together with a sense of
failing respiration and approaching death. 8

HISTORICA GRAPHICA COLLECTION / HERITAGE IMAGES / GETTY IMAGES


As the story caught the popular imagination,
journalists uncovered more tales of
witchcraft circulating among the people of
Stockport. One woman told of how her sister
had been bewitched, with the focus of the
spell being buried on the bed of the river
Mersey; she was forced to consult a local wise
woman, who through a magical spell and an
encounter with spirits was able to lift the
enchantment. 9
The Stockport witch bottle story displays
the gulf between the legal position in
England, and the beliefs which remained
widespread amongst its population. Since
the law no longer recognised the reality of
witchcraft, those who felt that they were
being persecuted by magic had no ofcial TOP: The prosecution of Jane Wenham in 1712 started a pamphlet war about the reality of witchcraft.
recourse to assist them. People who believed ABOVE: Witches in a graveyard and a passing man assailed by demons in a late 18th century print.
they needed protection from witches were
forced to take matters into their own hands,
most often through witch-bleeding.This to answer a charge of assault, after having A similar case was heard in 1869, by
practice involved drawing the blood of a struck her neighbour Elizabeth Williams magistrates in Durham, after two residents of
supposed witch as a means of dispelling on the arm with a knife. Davis admitted the village of Pity Me, Jonas Stoker and Mary
her magical power. Pricking the witchs to the material facts of the charge, though Howe, had assaulted one of their neighbours,
skin on the arm, or preferably the head, was this was, she claimed, merely an act of Sarah Judson. Howe claimed that Judson
supposedly sufcient, though the hostile self-defence. Williams was, stated Davis, had used some awful threat against one
feelings engendered by witches meant that a witch who had been hagging her to of Howes daughters and that, soon after,
bleedings were often more violent affairs. death and whose magical powers had been her husband and both of her daughters lost
Regardless of the level of violence present responsible for the death of her cat and their jobs, and the daughter who had been
in a witch-bleeding, the supposed witch donkey.10 The magistrates were unimpressed threatened was aficted with a series of
generally objected and assailants were by this argument, with one member of the ts. Suspecting witchcraft, Howe enlisted
frequently prosecuted. Subsequent court Bench stating that the lunatic asylum was the aid of Stoker, and the two visited the
records and newspaper accounts give us an the best place for a person entertaining home of Judson, where they stuck a darning
idea of the scale and nature of the practice. such dangerous notions. Williams had needle in her arm.The injury inicted
A typical witch-bleeding case was heard not, however, been seriously injured, and was minimal, and the magistrate, whilst
before the Axbridge Petty Sessions in Davis was subsequently sentenced to nd a deploring the belief in witchcraft, discharged
August 1867. Ann Davis was summoned surety to keep the peace for three months.11 Stoker and Howe on the payment of costs.12

FT359 39
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the jury eventually acquitted Heywood
on the grounds of insanity, it is clear that
commentators of the time felt there was
something disturbing about his air of
unthreatening normality.

FOR WANT OF AN EDUCATION


During Heywoods trial, it was made clear
by a number of witnesses that belief in
witchcraft remained widespread in Long
Compton; a local doctor, called to give
evidence, stated that such superstitions were
common, and that many local people used
the services of a wise man residing near
Banbury.The apparent strength of belief
in witches in the local area was such that,
at the conclusion of the trial, the presiding
judge, Baron Bramwell, went as far as to
comment that he hoped something would
be done to disabuse the people of a belief
in witchcraft. 18 The judges comments
reected a common theme in 19th-century
KGPA LTD / ALAMY STOCK PHOTO

writing on contemporary witchcraft, namely


that it was the product of ignorance and
might only be combated through education.
As one newspaper editorial from 1858
was to note, whilst substantial progress
had been made in educating the people of
Britain, the continual recurrence of these
cases of belief in witchcraft... shows that the
On occasion, the forces of law and order
would be called on to intervene in situations Cases of belief superstitions of a people are most difcult
to exterminate, and that even in the midst
before any violence had occurred. In 1865, of a nation distinguished for its intellectual
a woman approached the magistrates in
Devon, applying for protection from those
in witchcraft progress there are isolated spots which seem
to have stood still while all around them has
who believed that she was a witch.These
people had, she said, frequently threatened show that the participated in the general improvement. 19
Another newspaper editorial of the
her life, alleging that they felt sure that she period declared that education was the
was the cause of all their misfortunes. 13
The woman, a jovial looking widow with
superstitions of a only remedy to superstition and that,
moreover, it is not mere reading, writing,
a plump and ruddy countenance, denied
that she was a witch and sought protection; people are difficult and arithmetic that are wanted, but a kind
of education that will elevate, strengthen
and enlarge the thinking powers. 20 If
to exterminate
as her neighbours believed that nothing but
the spilling of her blood could deprive her people would only educate themselves, the
of her endish power, she feared that she argument went, then they would abandon
would be the subject of an attack. 14 their superstitions.
When tales like that of the Devonshire
widow emerged in the press they were
generally treated as curious oddities of
rural life rather than examples of the very
real threats to women in rural England. As
the people of Long Compton found out in
1867, with the death of Ann Tennant, the
consequences of a belief in witchcraft could
be severe indeed.
When James Heywood was brought before
the assizes, he was entirely unrepentant.
Within the village, he claimed, there lived
fteen or sixteen witches and that they
had bewitched him, and prevented his doing
his work. 15 Witnesses claimed that, after
the attack, he had called out to bystanders
that: I have done it; I meant to do it; there
are several of them I will serve the same.16
Yet he was, reported witnesses, a quiet
inoffensive man, except on the subject of
witchcraft.The governor of the gaol where
Heywood was held before trial had ample
opportunity to examine the accused at close
quarters, and said that his charge was a little TOP: The Cotswold village of Long Compton in the early 1900s. ABOVE: The 1871 census showing that Ann
weak-minded and eccentric. 17 Although Tennant and her murderer, agricultural labourer James Heywood, were near neighbours.

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MEDICINE, MADNESS AND MAGIC IN VICTORIAN TIMES
When James Heywood stood but I can hear em. They hop
trial for the murder of Ann about from ten oclock to twelve
Tennant, many contemporary oclock at night or one in the
observers believed that his morning; they go like this, op-
obsession with witches was a op-op-op. That is when
clear sign of his insanity. This she is blowing into my bowels.
was, however, a conclusion I saw your assistance some
reached on the basis of his months ago; and after that she
obsessional xation on the took it off for a time. She is a
malevolent forces he believed witch, and a proper witch, but
inhabited his village, and was how she do it, the dear lord
not necessarily representative only knows; I dont. 5
of wider cultural responses to
popular superstition. Medical The unnamed man was
and judicial authorities in the clearly in torment, and saw his
Victorian period were, in fact, physical and mental sufferings
more prone to interpret a belief as the product of bewitchment
in witches as the consequence by a woman he had deed.
of inadequate education There was, nevertheless, a
than a sign of an unhinged clear understanding amongst
mind. A person could, it was medical men that such

HULTON ARCHIVE / GETTY IMAGES


concluded, believe in the individuals were delusional
existence of witches whilst and, while deserving pity and
being otherwise sane. help, were suffering from a
The question of sanity and problem which was medical,
a belief in witchcraft was and not magical, in nature.
investigated in the courts in The speed at which
1886, the result of a dispute witchcraft beliefs were
over the will of a recently ABOVE: A Victorian illustration showing witches ying to the Sabbath. subsumed within a medical
deceased Barnstaple man, paradigm was relatively rapid.
Thomas Westren. Shortly application to the magistrates of the 19th century; they were As late as the mid-19th
before his death Westren had to defend her from certain considered by many doctors to century, illness including
been aficted by eczema and, persons unknown, who were be a medical curiosity and, as mental illness was still
seeking a cure, had consulted always practising witchcraft such, a number of accounts dominated by narratives of
an unnamed white witch of against her. 2 When examined were recorded by practitioners sin and moral suffering. This
Exeter, who had told him that by the magistrates Phillips of the time. Typical amongst was a paradigm in which
his condition was the result of stated that: ...she was these is the account taken by a the Reverend Henry Parr, in
witchcraft.1 Westren concluded continually being insulted by surgeon from an elderly man in a book published in 1861,
that he had been bewitched young men, who were using the West Riding of Yorkshire in could declare that of the many
by one of his daughters and, in bad language close at her side. 1891. The man reported that: mentally ill people conned
response, re-wrote his will to She could not tell who they to Victorian asylums, at least
exclude his children in favour were, but they were always Twelve months ago I gave some were undoubtedly
of his second wife. The will following her. She heard them evidence against Mary Anne possessed by devils. 6 The
was disputed after Westrens day and night, sometimes the Tinker at an inquest on her shift towards describing
death, partly on the basis that cries were up at the court, and husband. After it was over witchcraft beliefs in terms
his belief in witchcraft was sometimes in close by the wall she told me she would do my of mental competence and
an indication of his mental of her room. 3 business for me; and she said:- mental illness was, then, both
incapacity at the time at which Phillips interpreted her You will never be the man you signicant and decisive.
the will was made. The courts, experiences as a sign of are no more. The rst time she
nevertheless, found that the bewitchment; the magistrates attacked me she took me by NOTES
will was valid; Westrens belief and local authorities, the back part of the neck and 1 A Singular Suit, Sunderland
in witchcraft may have been meanwhile, saw them as a driv me across the house I Daily Echo and Shipping Gazette,
irrational, judges concluded, sign of mental illness, and it had a house of my own then. I 29 May 1886, p3.
but he was otherwise a sane is notable that contemporary could not see her, but I knew it 2 Witchcraft, Taunton Courier, 24
and competent individual. records described Phillips as was her. Some weeks back she Sept 1873, p6.
Whilst a belief in witchcraft a pauper lunatic wandering wrought me dreadful. I could 3 Ibid, p6.
was not, in itself, enough at large.4 Her experiences not keep a limb still or anything 4 Ibid, p6
to suggest insanity, it was were acknowledged by all, with in me. I found she had travelled
5 Witchcraft in Yorkshire,
recognised by medical the only substantial question to Rotherham then. She often
Portsmouth Evening News, 8 Jan
authorities that an obsessive being whether they should be pinches my hands, but not to 1891, p2.
belief in malevolent magic interpreted through a medical hurt. She puts wind into me.
6 Henry Parr, Sermons Preached
could be a symptom of mental or a magical paradigm. She puts it into me by blowing
in the Parish Church of Tunbridge,
illness. This can be seen in a Magical interpretations into something she has made. Kent (London: Wertheim,
case of 1873, when a woman of mental illness remained She sends things into the Macintosh, & Hunt, 1861), p199.
named Mary Phillips made an relatively common until the end room I sleep in; I cant see em,

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The notion that education would dispel would have imagined, stated The Chelmsford environment:
ignorance and superstition emerged during Chronicle in 1890, in these enlightened
a period when England was going through a times witchcraft would have lost its hold Nature with manifold mystic inuences
period of extended, and often contentious, on popular belief. 22 Similarly, reports keeps her hold on the rural population
educational reform. Many liberal observers that some of the inhabitants of Cornwall everywhere, but this hold is particularly
believed that the country trailed behind were going to witches for the cure of their strong in mountain lands, lonely isles, and
many of its industrial competitors in ailments led The Royal Cornwall Gazette to countries which have wide deserts. Nature
educational terms, and that the reluctance lament, in 1893, that: In spite of all our and God himself can be disregarded by ur-
of the government to provide free and modern education, the belief in witchcraft in ban masses of people; but it is otherwise in
accessible schooling for the population was many parts of England is as strong as ever it rural districts. Even on the plains of East
a source of shame.The regular emergence was. 23 Whilst the notion that the believers Anglia and the ats of Holland, people are
of stories of witch-bleedings and other in witchcraft were ignorant and ill-educated inuenced by forces and sensations which
examples of popular superstition could thus was a common narrative in press reports cannot be accounted for by visible and mate-
be used to support calls for educational during theVictorian era, it became hard to rial causes. 25
reform, as belief in witchcraft was taken as sustain when it was clear that even the well-
emblematic of the general foolishness of an schooled were resorting to magic. One of the common factors inVictorian
uneducated population. It was lamentable, witchcraft accounts is that they were
said one writer, that such ignorance should RURAL LIFE AND EVERYDAY MAGIC predominantly representations of life within
exist, but it did. 21 In the early years of the 20th century a a rural world. Almost invariably, tales of
When schooling was underfunded and writer named Duncan Campbell recorded supposed witchcraft are situated within a
largely in the hands of private providers, an account of his life in the Highlands of rural landscape; these are stories shaped by
during the 1850s and 1860s, it was relatively Scotland during theVictorian era. One livestock and agricultural pursuits, lime kilns
easy to claim that superstition was the of his formative inuences, he recalled, and harvests. 26 This was a world which had
product of a lack of education. Such was the landscape in which he had grown barely been touched by the urbanisation and
arguments were less convincing by the up and later lived in. Despite the schools, industrialisation that dominated English
1890s, after two decades of the concerted churches, and other institutions which economic and cultural life throughout the
efforts of various governments to extend and dominated the cultural life of his community 19th century.The village of Long Compton,
modernise the school system of England.The he noted that this was a superstitious where Ann Tennant met her death, was
strength of belief in witches remained strong society, which believed in the reality of located 50 miles (80km) to the south of
in many areas, a point which many middle- ghosts and malevolent spirits. 24 This was, Birmingham, but only a mile to the north
class observers found remarkable; One Campbell argued, a product of the Highland of the Rollright Stones; given his obsession

ABOVE: The Rollright Stones, on the border between modern-day Oxfordshire and Warwickshire, are rich in folklore, including a petrefaction by a hostile witch.

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the midst of us. 29
The rectors observations provide a
further reason as to why education had
little traction when it came to displacing
beliefs in witchcraft; which was that
magic remained useful as a means by
which the problems of the world might be
understood and resolved. Any hardship,
from the pain inicted by scrofula to the
failure of livestock on a Lincolnshire farm
to produce enough milk, could be blamed
on the activities of witches.30 People might
PETER ATKINSON / ALAMY STOCK PHOTO

fear that a disruption in the eggs and milk


supplied by their livestock was a sign of
malevolent magic or the ill-temper of
horses the result of witchcraft. 31 Witchcraft
could also function to explain any eerie or
otherwise inexplicable event a person might
encounter. In one instance in East Dereham,
the presence of witchcraft was proved in
ABOVE: The rugged landscape of Edmundbyers, where folk beliefs remained strong in the 19th century. the mind of the supposed victim when she
found a walking toad under a clod of earth
outside her house. 32
with witches, it is not hard to imagine that beliefs common in rural areas was the Rector A belief in witchcraft and magic provided
the latter played a far greater role in James of Edmundbyers who, for many years, had both an explanation of problems, and a
Heywoods view of the world than did the dwelt amongst his parishioners in a village means by which they might be resolved. A
former. in the foothills of the Pennines.The rector witch-bleeding might have been no more
Even in the later 19th century, the noted that folk beliefs and superstitions were than a minor ritual, but it had an impact as a
cultural impact of cities and machines had common amongst the local people. Injuries concrete, cathartic release of social tensions.
not yet intruded to any great extent into and illness, in particular, were met with a A display of educated scepticism might seem
the capricious and insecure rural world, magical response; the rector noted that, a more reasonable and rational response
whose inhabitants were as likely to rely on in his area, there was a woman who would to a modern reader, but offered far less to
magic and ritual as science and medicine. be used for blowing for burns, whilst a the inhabitants of rural England in the 19th
This tendency was observed by many of magical stone was employed on a sufferer century.
the middle-class outsiders dwelling within of erysipelas. 27 Other misfortunes might
rural communities, particularly professional see similar responses, and the rector stated DR JACOB MIDDLETON is a historian
gures such as priests and doctors who, by that in 1865, a witchman was consulted to and writer living in Sydney, Australia. He is
the nature of their work, were brought into locate a large sum of money stolen from a the author of Spirits of an Industrial Age, a
regular contact with a wide range of people. local works. 28 These things are strange but history of Victorian prowling ghosts, ghost-
One observer who wrote about the folk true, noted the rector, and are going on in impersonators, and Spring-Heeled Jack.

NOTES permitted by the Almighty; but 13 Belief in Witchcraft, Taunton 1910), p3.
1 Witchcraft, Reynoldss by no means do I believe they Courier, and Western Advertiser, 25 Campbell, p3.
Newspaper, 19 Dec 1875, 1. are suffered to appear half so 26 July 1865, p5.
frequently as our modern ghost- 26 Witchcraft, Taunton Courier,
2 See Brian P Levack, The 14 Ibid, p5. 29 Nov 1865, p8; Belief in
mongers manufacture them. See
Decline and End of Witchcraft Joseph Taylor, Apparitions; or, the 15 Witchcraft, Reynoldss Witchcraft, Grantham Journal, 27
Prosecutions in Bengt Ankarloo Mystery of Ghosts, Hobgoblins, Newspaper, 19 Dec 1875, p1. Dec 1890, p7.
and Stuart Clark (eds.) Witchcraft and Haunted Houses, Developed 16 Ibid, p1. 27 Witchcraft in Durham,
and Magic in Europe: The (London: Lackington, Allen, and Hartlepool Mail, 16 November
Eighteenth and Nineteenth 17 Ibid, p1.
Co, 1815), viii. 1882, 3.
Centuries (London: The Athlone 18 Ibid, p1.
Press, 1999), particularly pp7, 6 Generally speaking, the term 28 Ibid, p3.
19 Sorcery and Witchcraft,
10-11. witch bottle is used to describe 29 Ibid, p3.
Western Daily Press, 29 Sep
an artefact used for the purposes
3 Roy Porter, Witchcraft and 1858, p2. 30 Witchcraft at home,
of dispelling a supposed spell;
Magic in Enlightenment, Romantic 20 Witchcraft Again, Liverpool Portsmouth Evening News, 19
however, the reporting of this
and Liberal Thought, in Ankarloo Mercury, 1 Oct 1858, p6. June 1883, p2; Witchcraft in
event suggests that contemporary
and Clark (eds.) Witchcraft and Lincolnshire, Grantham Journal,
observers construed the bottles 21 Belief in Witchcraft, Western
Magic in Europe: The Eighteenth 15 June 1895, p2.
as components in some form of Daily Press, 18 Sep 1876, p4.
and Nineteenth Centuries, p195. malec magic. 31 Belief in Witchcraft, Derby
22 A Strange Story from Daily Telegraph, 7 Mar 1890, p4;
4 Ibid, p195. 7 Witchcraft in Stockport, The Sible Hedingham, Chelmsford Witchcraft in Lincolnshire,
5 It is worth noting that the Wells Journal, 21 Nov 1857, p3. Chronicle, 19 December 1890, 8.
strong Christian beliefs of the era Gloucester Citizen, 15 June 1895,
8 Ibid, p3. 23 Witchcraft, Royal Cornwall p3.
meant that magic and miraculous
9 Ibid, p3. Gazette, 23 Nov 1893, p6. 32 Modern Witchcraft, Morpeth
events were generally believed to
be, if not common, then at least 10 Witchcraft, Royal Cornwall 24 Duncan Campbell, Herald, 19 April 1879, p6.
possible. In the words of one early Gazette, 22 Aug 1867, p2. Reminiscences and Reections
19th century writer: I do believe 11 Ibid, p2.
of an Octogenarian Highlander
that, for certain purposes, and on (Inverness: Northern Counties
certain and all-wise occasions, 12 Witchcraft, Cheshire Newspaper and Printing and
such things are and have been Observer, 9 Jan 1869, p7. Publishing Company, Limited,

FT359 43
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LEFT: Patrick
McGoohan ack
McGoohan as secret
The Prisoner.

The short-lived
series remains as
weird and off-the-
wall as when it was
first broadcast 50
COURTESY OF ITV
The Bell Witch, Part One:
Adams FamilyValues

BRIAN STANSBERRY / CREATIVE COMMONS


If theres one piece of supernatural lore that everyone in the US has heard of,
then its probably Tennessees celebrated Bell Witch, but endless retellings
have made the case a difcult one to assess. ROGER CLARKE goes in search
of the spook-stalked pioneer home and its very American haunting...

Kate evinced remarkable knowledge as its such a rats nest of successive creature with the head of a rabbit and
of the forest, and would tell us where to loose fabrications, and feels still the body of a dog. The thing stared at
nd plenty of grapes, hazelnuts, herbs owned by authors and guides of the him for a few minutes and neither of
of every kind, a good hickory for axe Tennessee locality. I like that about them moved as the moment extended
handles, or tough stick for a maul it. Its an embarrassing ghost story, its into history. Bell red his gun, and
The Authenticated History of the Bell whole ethos sitting ill with modern the thing promptly left the scene. He
Witch, MV Ingram, 1894. ideas about what ghosts and spirits thought no more of it, though days
might possibly be, having more in later his son and daughter mentioned

O
ne day Ill hire a car in common with the Gef haunting of they had seen an old woman walking
Nashville and drive to Adams Cashens Gap (FT26932:40, 353:34-39). in the pear or apple orchard behind
a few weeks after Halloween, This cave, which exists not far from the house at more-or-less the same
I would think, when the trick-or-treat the now-vanished haunted house time. The daughter in this vision of
craziness is over and the last candy where the trees grow, is a projection the crone was named Elizabeth, or
has been kicked down a storm drain. of the landscapes motional quality a Betsy, then 11 years old, and became
Maybe not this year: its exactly crack in the ground where an unstable central to the story as it emerged in
200 years since the events began geology, prone to trapdoor sinkholes the following years. Animal shapes
(according to most accounts) and and the violence of earthquakes, continued to manifest themselves
theres bound to be, well, a celebration never quite settles down. Were told round the house in the following days:
or two for one of the most freighted of its where the Bell family used to store a large bird to son Drewery, a black dog
haunted houses, this creaking spook- foodstuffs during the summer months. to a slave named Dean.
stalked pioneer home central to the Publically, its now a kind of communal Then came the knocking. Knock.
American psyche. pocket of after-effects of that private- Knock. Knock. On the doors, on
Ill park the car. Walk. Feel the lie public catastrophe. The cave looks the walls, coming from outside it
of the land. Its still much as it was. cold and damp in the photographs seemed. Pranks were suspected, but
Gaze from the road to where in a Ive seen, with the remains, tellingly, no prankster caught. The sounds and
eld sown with tobacco crop a glade of a Choctaw or Cherokee box-grave, the thing moved inside. There was
of leaning trees, like something out and it is the last place where a female an implication of rats gnawing at the
of an M R James ghost-story, holds apparition associated with the witch bedposts of the children, the grind of
sentinel over the cellar of the original was seen to manifest oating off the sharp invisible teeth near their faces,
house which is still actually there, in ground, long-haired, sans feet, holding which would stop when a candle was
a process of slow collapse. Ill bite the a candle before it, emitting no kind of lit. Then some entity began plucking
bullet and take the ofcial tour of the light that anyone might need. the bedclothes from their bodies and
Bell Witch Cave, 1 walking its gullies What is or was the Bell Witch of the pillows from under their heads,
and seeing at rst-hand those chthonic popular account? with considerable and growing force.
shapes moulded by groundwater and One evening the family is awakened
rainwater in the geological owstone, THE HAUNT BEGINS by ear-piercing screams coming from
and the socket where the Native On a cool autumn day in 1817, Betsys room. Her parents nd the
American grave has been cleared out. in the small farming and church- 11-year-olds face covered in wounds
The Bell Witch, like Washington going community at Adams Station, and welts, and her hair matted into
Irvings Legend of Sleepy Hollow, Robertson County, near a bend in the knots.
written, by coincidence, in Red River on the border of Kentucky, It is said a Romanian peasant girl
Birmingham, England, while the Bell homesteader and slave-owner John named Eleanora Zugun, who was quite
Witch events were actually happening Bell Snr was walking the rows of corn extensively investigated by a German
thousands of miles away, is a kind near harvest time when he observed an parapsychologist in the 1930s, suffered
of foundation story for American incursion from another reality. from similar attacks (see FT347:16-17).
supernatural lore and belief. Its been It presented a taxonomically Tooth-marks would appear as red welts
overlooked in matters of serious study extravagant, zoomorphic appearance: a on the skin, accompanied by copious
Church two weeks into the haunt, on 15
November 1817, supercially on charges
of usury, though perhaps the nature of the
demonic entity residing in his household has
something to do with this rejection. It must
have been a terrible blow in such a God-
fearing small community.

A LANDSCAPE OF GHOSTS
Spring in Tennessee. Cornus orida puts
on a beautiful white oral display in early
spring. One day in 1818, 12-year-old Betsy
went into the woods looking for the shrub.
Easter Sunday was approaching and she
was gathering owers to beautify the house.
Something else is going on, though. She
sees something wrong, quite wrong. She
believes she sees the gure of a woman
hanging with both arms from a red oak2 at
a nearby sinkhole; there are some 3,602 of
them in this district.3 The gure has an ape-
like agility. As Betsy reaches to break off a
branch of owering dogwood, a disembodied
voice says: Betsy Bell, dont break a ower;
if you do, you will pay well for it.4
Events rumble on and in January 1819
amounts of unidentied spittle, which when by the ghost. Betsy turns 13; the witch brings fruit
analysed swarmed with staphylococci The spirit seems to have wide-ranging from the West Indies. Despite his removal
according to Alan Gauld and AD Cornell in knowledge of events all over the locality, from the church, its leader, by beautiful
their book Poltergeists (1979). Betsys arms and the secrets of many households. Similar coincidence another Fort, Dr Suggs Fort,
were scarred from the attentions of the supernatural indiscretions are not as rare proclaims his support for John Bell. Bell is
ghost, pinching, bruising, cutting; harm from as one might suppose they were noted by attacked by the witch during a meal with a
the spirit or harm from the self, take your the Welsh writer Giraldus Cambriensis as neighbour, and the witch for the rst time
pick. far back as 1191: it taxed them with all the vocalises its desire to kill him, as invisible
Then came the whispers, gaining power things they had done in their lives which whips whirr through the air and force him
and expressive traction, burgeoning into they were least willing should be known or howling in pain to the oor.
the main feature of the haunt. Initially it spoken about. Like some antebellum Baba Yaga, the Bell
sounded like an old woman crying weakly Then a very odd thing happens, not much Witch moves between acts of kindness and
and somewhat piteously, but it was the dwelt upon in most accounts, but very malice. It also expresses different voices and
spirit, it seems now, learning how to speak, interesting to me. John Bell nds himself personalities. The spirit claims to be looking
as if speaking was an unfamiliar and alien excommunicated from the Red River Baptist for a lost tooth beneath the Bell House, and
process. Again, this recalls the perceived
learning process of Gef a century later.
Inexplicable lights danced round the outside
of the house in the evening.
Betsy hallucinates that her bed is on re
and at this point the spirit begins to speak
words and sentences of mocking malignancy,
with implicit threats against John Bell; it is
said these vocalisations have an odd, vexing
sonic quality, and bring ringing, or even a
ow of blood, to peoples ears.
John Bell Sr begins to suffer a series of
maladies; he says he can feel something
like a stick lodged sideways in his mouth.
He nds it hard to speak and eat. The Bells
share their experiences with members of
the local church, and there begins a series
of visits and witnessing by their usually
respectable neighbours. The children are
continually brutalised in bed with stinging
slaps from invisible hands. One neighbour
challenges the ghost to shake his hand it
does its a soft, delicate impress that
clutches his hand sideways, as if reaching
up, or reaching down; a peculiar detail.
The fame of the spirit brings many visitors,
including the pleasingly named Dr William
Fort from Missouri, who believes the whole
business is an act of ventriloquism. Witch- TOP: The Bell House. ABOVE: The slave Dean encounters a two-headed black dog.
hunters and ghost-removers are sent packing

46 FT359
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claims to be from one of the nearby Native
American graves. After a brief respite, it
sends the household on a fools errand to
retrieve supposedly buried treasure near
Red River beneath an enormous at rock.
It appears as a rabbit in the woods, a
black dog on a road. It turns the slave
Dean into a mule, a detail from the life of
St Augustine5 to those who know. A whole
nest of entities makes itself known: the
witch family. Blackdog has a female voice
and is head of the family. Mathematics
and Cypocryphy speak in the manner
of young girls. Jerusalem is a boy. Betsy
begins a shy courtship with an older boy
named Joshua; both her teacher Richard
Powell, who has designs on marrying the girl
himself, and the witch, in most accounts, are
disapproving.
The witch suddenly identies herself to
Revd James Gunn as Kate Batts. She is
a former neighbour of the Bells, another
slave-owner, one suspected of practising
witchcraft. Kate Batts was, by blood, Mrs
Bells niece.
The witchs loathing of the father of the
house is matched by her kittenish adoration
for Mrs Bell; in other words, her aunt Lucy. ABOVE: The death of John Bell and the administer-
When Lucy falls ill of pleurisy, the witch ing of the mysterious liquid to the cat.
sings to her and magics hazelnuts from the LEFT: Betsy Bell, in an illustration from the 1894
woods, which fall from the ceiling. When Authenticated History of the Bell Witch.
asked to crack them, she cracks them. With
this power, she could break every bone in
John Bells body, but she seems unable to solstice, he dies. John Jr supposedly nds
do so. A seemingly universal prohibition, an anomalous bottle of medicine in the
commented on by both Guy Playfair and room, one third full of an unknown liquid.
Colin Wilson, seems to forbid serious harm Kate claims she has used it to poison Bell.
to victims of poltergeists. Some is given to the cat; it deranges, then
The Bell Witch is energetically, vividly kills it. The vial is thrown into the bedroom
racist scurrilously, offensively so. She replace, and a popping is heard as it
violently upbraids and assaults the slaves bursts into a bright blue ame 9 that soon
but seems frightened of visiting their ares out. Surely now she can prove her
houses. She locks the legs of a young black credentials as a spirit of the dead, yet when
girl, Phyllis, behind her head. I despise requested, Kate refuses or seems unable
how you slaves smell, Kates disembodied to put the family in direct post-mortem
voice rants to the room. Another domestic contact with John Bell Snr. She sings in
slave, Anky, is covered in a layer of the the open air beside the grave, performing
witchs spittle when she hides beneath a riotous drinking songs during the funeral;
bed. Theres a bad smell in this house and her contempt is complete and her summons
its Ank I smell her under Old Luces bed. seems to be complete.
When one slave carries what is clearly an In May 1821, Kate bids the family
African charm6 to protect himself from the
spirit, Kate demands he surrender it, which
A whole nest of farewell and claims she will revisit in seven
years. Betsy marries her teacher. Time
she then combusts.
According to the main living commentator entities makes passes. January of 1828 comes and it goes.
Then in February comes a scratching on the
on the case, the land that comprised weatherboarding outside the house, and
the Bell farm is the nal resting-place of
hundreds and possibly thousands of Native
itself known the once again, covers on the bed are twitched
away from sleepers. In a curious incident,
Americans.7 The slave Uncle Zeke sees a
landscape lively with Indian ghosts who are witch family smoke congeals into a large ball of dark
wool the size of a water pail which then
in a kind of locked purgatorial state within rolls up the chimney. After a while, she
the bounds of landscape. Those dead Native quits the home and visits that of son John
Americans, who lived here, are still here, Jackson, arch-Mason and scourge of the Bell Jr, who speaks angrily to the witch.
because they dont have anywhere to go, says Native American populace in the area. He Amongst other things, she predicts the
Zeke, echoing an idea, popular at the time, is quoted as saying I would rather ght Civil War. After several months of prophetic
that the unbaptised became disembodied the entire British Army than deal with that discussions, she leaves. Or does she? There
souls, because Heaven and Hell are closed thing they call the Bell Witch! 8 are ambiguous incidents in a house made
to them. When Zeke hears about neighbour All Hallows. The crisis peaks. In October from the salvaged wood from the Bell
Cobban Hall digging up Indian bones, he 1819 John Bells shoes repeatedly y manse on Browns Ford Bluff. In the 1950s
knows there is gwinter be trouble. off when hes outside tending the hog teenagers who steal a gravestone connected
Theres a visit, supposedly, from the then pen. He has a seizure of some kind. Two to the case come to a sticky end when the
Major General, later President, Andrew months later, a few hours before the winter car crashes and they are killed.

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EARLY ACCOUNTS manifestation which has many things in Interestingly, the author relates the story
Its maintained in most of the books on the common with other such haunts. There is to the Cock Lane ghost (see FT150:30-33,
subject that the rst ever ofcial mention of an invisible intelligence in the household 335:36-41). Its similar insofar as it seems
the Bell Witch in print was in Goodspeeds of pubescent children who likes to taunt to have audiences of strangers attending
History of Tennessee (1886). The chapter on and annoy. It is a lying spirit, and it tells after dark in an apparently active haunt. Its
Robertson County observed: untruths. It is a trickster. There are physical a sceptical account, noting that the witch
A remarkable occurrence, which attracted welts and weals on the skin of the focus only manifested itself, as ghosts are wont
wide-spread interest, was connected with the child. Bedclothes are twitched from beds. to do, at night. People came from all over
family of John Bell, who settled near what Foodstuffs, in particular, are apported, and to hear it talk, till Mr Bell complained that
is now Adams Station about 1804. So great interfered with. Though the most famous the guests were eating him out of house and
was the excitement that people came from aspect of the haunt the vocalisations are home. It would be heard sometimes in one
hundreds of miles around to witness the rare, they are certainly not unknown. The part of the house, and sometimes in another;
manifestations of what was popularly known handshake seems to be an early detail, and moving about from the oor, under the oor,
as the Bell Witch. This witch was supposed that is indeed quite an odd and unique and the walls, to the beds, open space in
to be some spiritual being having the voice marker. the midst of the house, the roof etc when
and attributes of a woman. It was invisible However, it turns out there are two earlier asked how long it was going to remain, it
to the eye, yet it would hold conversation and sources, the rst in a newspaper called would replay Until Joshua Gardner and
even shake hands with certain individuals. the Green Mountain Freeman, published Betsy Bell get married. The report ends
The freaks if performed were wonderful and in a small piece on 7 February 1856. 10 on an unequivocal and damning note: It
seemingly designed to annoy the family. It turned out that Miss Betsey (sic) Bell was a
would take the sugar from the bowls, spill ventriloquist.
the milk, take the quilts from the beds, slap Theres also a handwritten deposition in
and pinch the children, and then laugh at the State Library and Archives in Nashville,
the discomture of its victims. At rst it was which originates from the Archives of the
supposed to be a good spirit, but its subsequent Tennessee Historical Society. Im most
acts, together with the curses with which it grateful for a Twitter friend, Douglass
supplemented its remarks, proved the contrary. Harlow from the US, for bringing this to
At its most stripped down in the 1886 my attention, and sending me copies of the
account, which does not include the death original handwritten documentation. They
of John Bell at the hand of the witch, we date from 1880 and are two county sketches
can suppose a possibly genuine poltergeist that were written for the Nashville
BRAD06 / CREATIVE COMMONS

ABOVE: Another roadside attraction a sign for the Bell Witch Cave in Adams, Tennessee. TOP: The grave of John and Lucy Bell.

48 FT359
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chilling. It cracked hazel nuts for Mrs Bell, as
well as giving her grapes, dropping the wet
hulls upon the oor, looking as if they had been
moistened by being cracked in the mouth. Its
arrival followed a graded noise-pattern, a
ladder of deposition from top to bottom. On
making its approach it would rst be heard
striking the roof of the house with a brush or
limb of a tree; then it would be heard to drop
as if from the [rafters?] to the second oor, and
then on the rst, making as loud a noise as
would any large man.
One thing is made very clear: there were
never any apparitions All the time the
witch was invisible.
At times, when family and friends would be
sitting round the re, nuts and acorns would
fall on the hearth, coming apparently from the
ue of the chimney, but when anyone would
endeavour to pick them up, they couldnt be
WWW78 / CREATIVE COMMONS

found. On one occasion a large dinner pot


rolled down and out into the oor, and then
disappeared leaving not a greasy spot. At one
time a vial of poison was found in the ue of
the chimney and being taken down, Dr George
B Hopson gave one drop to a cat, causing its
death in several seconds. The witch claimed to
ABOVE: The entrance to the Bell Witch Cave. have put the poison there for the purpose of
killing Mr Bell. Being asked how it was going
to administer the poison, it said by pouring
Centennial Exposition, a kind of city fair or out daubing from between the wooden it into the dinner pot. It is remarkable that
fete, in 1880. They were later reproduced in logs of the house and sprinkling it on the although he enjoyed good health up to the time
the journal American Historical Magazine.11 middle of the oor. It told them where to of this event, Mr Bell died within days after
The sketch of Sevier County is by WL look for gold on a fools errand. It gripped the vial was found, being in a stupor at the
Duggan, while the Robertson County sketch Betsy so hard that bruises in the shape of time of his death.
is anonymous. ngers could be seen on her arm. It could In the second anonymous document,
Im going to look at this in some detail as speak several languages which ones, is the witchs farmyard talents are recorded.
it isnt that well known in the literature. not said. It shook a mans hand. Its range of It could bark and lap like a dog, buzz like a
The account claims that the haunting knowledge of the community appeared to swarm of bees, crow like a rooster, gobble and
began in 1818 and carried on to 1822, extend about seven miles. It could unlock yelp like a turkey, quack like a duck
with the death of Mr Bell. It began with doors, despite the effort of a stout man There appear to have been people writing
scratchings and bedclothes twitching. People trying to stop the key from turning. Clearly about the case between 1891 and 1894
came from six counties to hear its profane mimicking the voice of a household member, (including individuals identied as Charles
and vulgar talk. It claimed early on to be a it would set the dogs on passers-by as they W Tyler, Mahala Darden and Rev James G
spirit, complaining that its burial had been walked the road. It would take chewing Byrns), 12 but it was only in 1894 that the
disturbed, and it seems it wasnt just a tooth tobacco out of the mouth of Mr Bell and rst really extensive account of the Bell
but a whole skull dug from a mound by the deposit it in an old, much-used pipe stem Witch was published
river and taken back to the family home. at least he thought it was there, though his
It seems the family replaced the skull in friend could see nothing of the kind. Hot ROGER CLARKE is is a former writer and
the grave from which it was taken, but the coffee would disappear from a ready cup, as lm critic at the Independent. His book A
hauntings continued. if someone had drunk it. Natural History of Ghosts is widely available
Its early manifestations include gouging There are a couple of details I nd quite from Penguin.

NOTES 5 He claimed that there were of his wifes own hair. that a blue light on stage denoted
1 http://www.bellwitchcave.com/ certain taverns in Italy who served the presence of the supernatural.
cheese to their customers which 10 http://chroniclingamerica.loc.
2 In another episode, the whole 7 Pat Fitzhugh, The Bell Witch: The
would turn them into a beast of gov/lccn/sn84023209/1856-02-07/
devil family of the Bell Witch are Full Account (The Armand Press,
burden for an allotted time, during ed-1/seq-1/
described as sitting in trees; its in Nashville, 2009.)
which these unscrupulous men
the trees etc. would use their guests as beasts 8 There is no independent 11 WL Duggan, Sketches of
3 https://tnlandforms.us/ of burden. evidence of his attendance at the Sevier and Robertson Counties,
landforms/sinks.php farm, or that he even knew about American Historical Magazine, vol.
6 It included Tarn Fire and Spunk 5, no. 4, 1900, pp310325 (www.
the Bell Witch.
4 In my childhood we were never (I have no idea) and Brimstone jstor.org/stable/42657394).
allowed to bring May or owering and Foxre, also sometimes 9 At the time that this fabrication
Hawthorn into the house my called fairy re, a bioluminescent was inserted by MV Ingram in 12 The Tennessee archival
mother would take it straight out fungus present in decaying wood, 1894 in his Authenticated History document also mentions FR Miles,
if you did. and was held together by strands of the Famous Bell Witch, it was a William Pride, W Gooch, Ben B
well-established theatrical tradition Batts.

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cBUILDING Ac THE HIEROPHANTS APPRENTICE PRESENTS

FORTEAN LIBRARY
26. DOWN YOUR RABBIT HOLE
communications. So now we know where
Consider this: According to polls conducted over the last decade or so, around half we stand on that one. (To the full-on
of Americans think their government is probably hiding the truth about the 9/11 conspiracist, such findings are, of course,
attacks. Almost four in 10 suspect that climate change is a scientific fraud. Something just another part of the all-pervading
like a third believe the government is likely hiding evidence of aliens. More than a cover-up.) Consider also the insistence of
quarter are worried about the New World Order. In a 2013 survey, four per cent of the early 19th-century opponents of smallpox
people polled (which, extended to the entire population of the United States, would vaccination that the vaccine contained
mean 12 million people) said they think shape-shifting reptilian people control poison of adders, the blood, entrails
our world by taking on human form and gaining political power to manipulate our and excretion of bats, toads and suckling
societies. Its not just Americans... According to a 2011 Pew Research Center survey, whelps, and compare with latter-day
between half and three quarters of people in various Middle Eastern countries obsessives claims that modern vaccines
doubt that Arab hijackers pulled off the 9/11 attacks Four out of 10 Russians think contain antifreeze, insect repellent and
that America faked the moon landings And in Brazil, a popular conspiracy theory spermicide. Perhaps oddest of all: it
asserts that the American military is planning to invade the Amazon rain forest and seems that the infinite wickednesses of
take control of its rich natural resources. Conspiracy theories, then, are neither the the Elders of Zion include the promotion
exclusive property of heavily-armed, beetle-browed trailer trash nor limited to that of jazz, chewing gum (makes women
great nation where such admirable folk abide in peace. Conspiracism is nonetheless promiscuous, honest) and even, for
a minority interest or obsession.The rest of us nurse our simple faith in (among some reason, dog exhibitions. Barking
other things) accidents, coincidences and the cock-up theory of history, and wonder mad, or what?
why so many people believe that everything that happens is the result of a fiendishly But, as Brotherton continually and
complex plot, and one that only they know about. Its this question that Rob tactfully reminds us, we shouldnt be too
Brotherton explores in Suspicious Minds. snooty about conspiracism. Differently
sane as some of its more exotic nooks
and crannies may be, conspiratorial
The central chapters of Brothertons logic has its roots in what keeps the rest
argument could have been written in of us functioning normally, not to say
almost any order, since the factors that alive. Among its many other functions,
bring about conspiracy thinking dont the human brain seeks patterns. We are
form a logical, linear flow, one thing driven to try to make sense of the world,
following from another: rather, they form especially those parts of it that dont, at
a network of influences, predispositions first blush, make sense. We join dots, even
and propensities, most of them based in where they exist only by inference, as
straightforward survival instincts.Taken in the trick illustration on the opposite
together, and suitably fuelled, they may page (invented by the Italian psychologist
act as a set of centripetal forces to tip Gaetano Kanizsa in 1955) look at it and
the susceptible mind into what most of see if you can unsee the non-existent
us might call paranoid thinking. One of lines of the white triangle. Detecting
Brothertons most salient points is that patterns allows us to understand the
this isnt paranoia as such just a natural activity of a flock of sheep (goats take
caution, which we all share, taken to more effort), plant and harvest crops,
extraordinary lengths. choose a suitable or reject an unsuitable
Consequently, he doesnt spend too mate, and (up to a point) predict the
much time on detailing or disentangling weather: all remain critical to survival.
individual conspiracy theories, although As is reading the behaviour of traffic
along the way we are treated to some on a crowded highway. Its the task of
curious facts.Take the tin-foil hat, famous conspiracists to detect the patterns the
for fending off EM radiations emitted rest of us dont see.
by aliens and other unseemly entities The virtually unavoidable next
that want to control and confuse ones crackling of the neurons produces
thoughts.The idea, it turns out, was first checking sundry designs including the the suspicion, even conviction, that a
dreamed up by Julian Huxley for a science Fez, Classical and Centurion. Contrary discovered pattern must be significant it
fiction story, The Tissue-Culture King, to expectations not only did foil fail to must have a meaning. Kaniszas triangle(s)
published in 1927. In 2005 researchers at block radio waves, it actually amplified demonstrate something about perception,
MIT put tinfoil hats to the test (one would certain frequencies notably [those] but also form a Magen David, the Shield
so love to see that grant application), allocated to the US government for GPS of David. Now theres a feast for the

50 FT359
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imagination. Which needs little Powers That Be. As Brotherton
stimulation to start generating indicates (see below), this is
stories narratives if you will magical thinking. Everything
to elaborate and explain and is connected. Nothing is
put flesh on the pattern and its insignificant: all dots will join
significance. A further more in the end, from traffic lights to
or less autonomic process that treacle pie. Occams Razor does
comes into play is our propensity not apply.There are no exits from
to discern intention in behaviour this particular burning theatre.
and events.The sparser our Paradoxically this doesnt seem to
information, the more ambiguous bother conspiracists, all bawling
things are, and the greater the Fire! as they are, since (we
tendency to let the imagination infer) such occult knowledge is
run erroneously riot. On the power and confers agency to the
other hand, if you spot (sorry) a powerless. So even in ultimate
leopard supine on the branches defeat the conspiracist remains
above you, youre at once, a hero, albeit a martyred one.
sensibly, wondering if its asleep, At the same time, there must be
if it has its eye on you or that dik- comfort in the thought that as
dik over there for its next snack, long as there is delving to be done
or if its just being feline and in pursuit of the ultimate secret,
enjoying the sound of its own the prospect of nemesis remains
purr. And without an intention distant. And meanwhile, too,
detector, Brotherton shows one can enjoy a world free from
through sundry illustrations, uncertainty.
most of human (let alone animal) Brotherton has one more
life and culture would not be possible. common human characteristic to offer
The 9/11 conspiracy theory illustrates AFTER in his general thesis that conspiracists
this perfectly. It stands on two major legs:
that the Twin Towers and World Trade
NOURISHMENT, belong at one end of a spectrum of
normalities, and that is confirmation
Center collapsed as they did because of
pre-positioned demolition charges, which
SHELTER AND bias. At its simplest, this means that we
tend to look for evidence that supports
caused them to fall straight down rather
than topple sideways; and the aircraft
COMPANIONSHIP, our preconceptions: hence some of
us read the Salisbury Review for its
that were flown into the buildings were, STORIES ARE incomparable wisdom while others
in effect, piloted by patsies to distract prefer the incontrovertible perspicacity
from the Truth and provide cover for a THE THING WE of the Morning Star. So, research shows,
preconceived US government retaliation people who start with a penchant for the
against, e.g., Saddam Hussein, who hadnt NEED MOST IN unorthodox will tend to give a sympathetic
been done in properly a decade previously. hearing to conspiracy theories. But it
So, its all a fiendish government plot.The THE WORLD. goes deeper than that: people giving
conventional truth is that skyscrapers credence to a wide range of paranormal
are designed (for obvious reasons) to Philip Pullman and anomalistic claims will tend to
sit straight down on themselves in the believe conspiracy theories.The scientific
unlikely event of their collapsing leaving methods emphasis on falsifiability
aside the difficulty of placing such charges evolved to overcome this habit of mind
undetected and that a handful of Arab The Man from Laramie if you prefer). And (not that it always succeeds), and forteans
fanatics did pull off this spectacular the truth shall set you free.Therein lies ideally make impartial judgements about
assault. But that, Brotherton observes, some, albeit not the whole, of the appeal evidence of oddities. But most of us go
is deemed too simple an explanation for of conspiracy theories. But there is also with our own flow. When were faced
an event so massive in its consequences: something peculiar to conspiracy tales: with a murky pool of evidence, says
the more devastating the incident, the although every counter-argument to them Brotherton, biased assimilation filters out
more elaborate must be the conspiratorial is absorbed as part of the cover-up, the anything that doesnt fit what we already
narrative behind it, is the general rule he conspiracies themselves remain unproven. believe, leaving behind the illusion
identifies from this and other examples. Brotherton contends that this is by design. that the truth is crystal clear. As ever,
And compared to the parsimonious He points out (as did Dr Clare Birchall Brotherton adduces loads of research to
official version, the complexity of the 9/11 two decades ago apparently unnoticed secure his analysis.
conspiracy story and its cast of thousands by Brotherton) that conspiracy narratives Given the evidence, its easy enough to
offers a virtually limitless supply of have no final resolution, and he reasons agree that conspiracism is rooted in innate
intent. that the implication that there is always human responses to the world. If one has a
What kind of story are we talking about more to be discovered keeps the very quibble with Brotherton its that he doesnt
in conspiracy lore? Brotherton has two notion of conspiracy alive.These theories explore what it may be that tends or bends
answers: first, the conspiracist, in seeing deep down, are unanswered questions one person to crediting conspiracies, while
through the camouflage and shenanigans and always a work in progress, he says. another remains content to accept that the
of the official version (of pretty much Which perhaps explains the zealous world is largely as it seems.That may seem
everything) and revealing the unsuspected addiction they produce in devotees. a lot to ask, but someone ought to try. If the
scary Truth, is re-enacting an ancient, To gloss: this is a world in which there Illuminati will allow it
archetypal plot: the Hero defeats the are no accidents, no mere coincidences,
Monster, or good underdog vanquishes no credibility to the bumper sticker that -------------------
wicked top dog. Compare everything from fatalistically proclaims SHIT HAPPENS. Rob Brotherton, Suspicious Minds: Why We
Beowulf or St George and the dragon to We shouldnt resign ourselves to fate, Believe Conspiracy Theories, Bloomsbury
The Lord of the Rings (or High Noon and but to the endless machinations of the Sigma, 2015

FT359 51
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SEND FORUM SUBMISSIONS TO: THE EDITOR, FORTEAN TIMES, PO BOX 71602, LONDON E17 0QD, UK, OR TO DRSUTTON@FORTEANTIMES.COM

Hinzelmann: the German Gef?


and place believed in, then perhaps Gef
SD TUCKER argues it upon his adopted some of the aspects of
that, among his many little table his German cousin because, in
other talents, Gef the What was put some weird way, this was how
Talking Mongoose might on his plate he would have been expected to
also have been able to vanished... But manifest. Or maybe Gef, being an
sprechen eine bisschen the food was extra-clever talking mongoose,
Deutsch. afterwards had read Keightleys book

W
found lying himself. Today, a variant-form
ith the publication under the of Hinzelmann has returned
of Christopher benches, or to the publics consciousness
Josiffes brilliant in a corner as a character who demands
new book about of the room. child-sacrifices in Neil Gaimans
Gef the Talking Mongoose, Gef, too, was American Gods novel and TV
there has been a lot about this supposed to series. If Gef has been reading
amusing little animal in FT pinch bacon, that too, lets hope he hasnt
recently. However, I think I leave teeth- picked up any similar urges
might have one more obscure marks in next time he chooses to appear
parallel with the case which has supposed to have left a very butter and pilfer biscuits from to someone like young Voirrey
often been missed. 1 In a 2016 small depression, as if a cat had jars. Once, some stolen carrots Irving...
book 2 I briefly compare Gef to been there on the Castles beds were found under a bed; Gef said
a Teutonically famous fairy-like further evidence of his Gef-like he had vomited them up, but NOTES
polt (or polt-like fairy, if you nature? 3 had he? He was heard eating, but 1 In fact, Josiffe does briefly mention
prefer) known as Hinzelmann of The German sprite initially was this just a put-on, as with a 1936 French magazine article
Hudemhlen. Hinzelmann was a manifested by making typical Hinzelmann? I am reminded of which also apparently linked Gef and
kobold, a sort of German house- polt-like noises from inside walls, the 1927-30 Poona haunting in Hinzelmann. (Christopher Josiffe, Gef!
sprite, who haunted Hudemhlen before later developing a voice, Gefs original homeland of India, The Strange Tale of an Extra-Special
Castle in Lower Saxony from much as Gef did. Hinzelmann where some fruit, left out as a Talking Mongoose, Strange Attractor
1584 to 1588, playing tricks used this voice to give himself peace-offering, was apparently Press, 2017, pp198-9).
upon the occupants. Today the an autobiography every bit as eaten by the ghost to the 2 SD Tucker, The Hidden Folk: Are
original haunting has become dubious as Gefs claim to have accompaniment of lip-smacking Fairies and Poltergeists Just the
Same Thing?, CFZ Press, 2016,
a much-loved German folk been originally born in Delhi noises; the polt later flung the
pp311-313.
tale, accruing many obviously on 7 June 1852; according to skins, scraped clean with
invented elements down the Hinzelmann, he was a human teeth-marks clearly visible on 3 There is both an anonymous
1704 pamphlet and a 1965 book
years. Semi-fictional or not, being, who had been born in the them at its victims. 4 But again,
by the German folklorist Will-Erich
however, it seems Hinzelmann Bohemian Mountains and had a this sounds like pure pantomime. Peuckert which are alike entitled
was a very similar entity to Gef. wife named Hille Bingels. By his The fact that Gef apparently entitled Der Vielfrmige Hintzelmann,
Notably, Hinzelmann was able own account, he had fallen out stole food is not a definite or The Many Shapes/Colours of
to manifest in a variety of forms, with friends with whom he had indication that he was a physical Hinzelmann, which I would hope
including a figure like that of a been living in a forest and was flesh-and-blood creature. might feature some further details
black marten which, like Gef, only seeking temporary refuge Thomas Keightleys 1828 about Hinzelmanns marten/weasel-
like form, but I cant read enough
could talk. The tale goes that, until such time as he could make folklore classic The Fairy
German to tell! (Hinzelmann, as a
one day, a group of men came to up with them. When asked if he Mythology: Illustrative of the diminutive form of Heinrich, is also
the Castle and tried to stab the was a kobold or a polter geyst, Romance and Superstition of a generic term for German fairies,
invisible spuk with their rapiers, Hinzelmann heartily denied it, Various Countries features a akin to the English Robin, so these
a task in which they failed; as saying: What have these to do longer account of Hinzelmanns texts may not only describe the
they left the room, Hinzelmann with me? They are the Devils activities. I wonder if any Hudemhlen sprite).
mockingly appeared in animal- spectres, and I do not belong members of the Irving family, 4 Harry Price, Poltergeist Over
shape and sarcastically laughed to them! I am a Christian like who were at the centre of the England, Country Life, 1945,
Ha ha! How well you caught any other man and I hope to be Gef case, might have read it pp3678; Alan Gauld & Tony Cornell,
me! (Gef was also very proud of saved. Compare this to what Gef themselves or spoken to some Poltergeists, Routledge Kegan-Paul,
escaping human snares.) I know replied when asked if he was a other Manxmen on the famously 1979, p106
that a marten isnt precisely the poltergeist: I am not like one of fairy-mad isle who had? If so, this
same thing as a mongoose or the those. Again, the brownie-like need not be seen as an indication 2 SD TUCKER writes regularly
ghost in the form of a weasel Hinzelmann could also eat, at of fakery. If poltergeists really for FT, and is the author of the
Gef sometimes claimed to be, but least sort of: The servants are ideoplastic in nature, as some recently published book Space
to laymen these animals all look were obliged every day to have theorised, taking on the Oddities: Our Strange Attempts
very much alike. Upon several prepare a dish full of sweet-meat, ostensible form of brownies in to Explain the Universe, amongst
occasions Hinzelmann was also with crumbs of wheaten bread, areas where brownies are still several others.

FT359 53
www.forteantimes.com
FORUMSDSDSVDSVS

The Golem walks among us!


LEFT: A Golem exhibition at Berlins
Jewish Museum in 2016. FACING
MICHAEL BARRON tracks PAGE: Marvels Golem in 1974.
the transformation of
the soulless dummy otherwise known as Yossi Stein,
of medival Jewish protector of the Jewish people
folklore to 21st century against their enemies, including
multimedia superstar... the Black Nazi, numerous demons
and a vampire from Transylvania.

W
A notable graphic novel
hat do Jesus presenting a history of a racially
Christ, Carole divided America is James
King, Buddy Holly Sturms The Golems Mighty
and Eva Peron Swing. In 1920s America, the
have in common with The Golem? Stars of David baseball club, a
They have all been the subject team of itinerant Jewish baseball
of acclaimed stage shows or players, suffer financial woes
musicals. until a promoter suggests that
Three years ago, the 1927 the teams black clean-up hitter
theatre company staged what wear a Golem costume in order
the Evening Standard described to drum up interest. It works, but
as the most magical show in at the same time anti-Semitism
town: Golem. It was still being soars, with one newspaper editor
toured in the UK as late as writing that the team must
October 2017 and continues to vanquish the Jews, whom he
play internationally.The shows portrays as greedy individualists
star can certainly be accused poised to suck the money out of
of being a soulless, manmade the town.
creation, but he is no lumbering
SEAN GALLUP / GETTY IMAGES

fool more of a manipulator LITERATURE, DRAMA AND FILM


and control freak, creating the In 2012, Jewish Book Week, the
perception that he is making second oldest literary festival
peoples lives easier by taking in the UK after Cheltenham,
away the factors that appear to celebrated its 60th anniversary.
cause stress, unhappiness and While the festival boasted
underachievement. However, the high-profile guests like Deborah
storys characters end up far more COMICS Lippstadt and Howard Jacobson,
depressed and miserable as a NewYork City The Golem is no stranger to it was the Golem that featured
result of the Golems actions; and, Marvel Comics, appearing in most prominently in press
each time, the Golem receives an boasts a klezmer- flashback sequences in The releases. As well as a screening
upgrade before a new, improved, Incredible Hulk #134 from of the classic 1920 silent film
must-have version of himself is rock band called December 1970.The story The Golem, there were other
released into the world. It was a
smart, satirical updating of the Golem finds the jade giant in Central
Europe, where he is mistaken
adaptations, including, The Golem
of Wapping at the Jewish Museum
Jewish Golem myth in which for the mythical monster by a London.
a magical being is created from little girl and helps her fathers While well-known to Jewish
inanimate mater for our times. Olivia Cooke. resistance movement overthrow audiences, the Golem has
(For the most famous version, The Golems popularity in a dictator.The Marvel version of gradually become embedded
Rabbi Loew and the Golem of the 21st century isnt confined the Golem later lumbered into in wider popular literature. M
Prague, see FT238:30-37) to the theatre and the cinema. Strange Tales #174, 176 and 177 Henderson Elliss 2013 comic
Even when the Golem isnt Youll find him shambling in 1974. A friendlier incarnation novel Keeping Bedlam at Bay
the central character, he makes through comic books and graphic of the monster was Mendy and in The Prague Caf, is set in the
his presence felt, as in Peter novels, modern literature, the Golem, which appeared in Prague of the early 1990s and
Ackroyds 1994 novel, Dan music, advertising, Pokmon, the early 1980s, billed as The features Golem scholars and
Leno and the Limehouse Golem. Kickstarter campaigns, Worlds Only Kosher Comic trackers who believe Golems
This year, Ackroyds novel has Craigslist, scientific theories, Book; a revived version is still are hiding in television sets;
been made into a successful cryptocurrency, television, around today. In 2003, Israeli they follow what they believe
international film, The Limehouse YouTube channels and computer comic book writers Eli Eshed to be a Golem, but it turns out
Golem, featuring Bill Nighy and games. and Uri Fink created The Golem, to be a just a cash machine.

54 FT359
www.forteantimes.com
SDSDSVDSVS

Other recent popular novels We will supply all materials processing unit) cheaply. Users
featuring the Golem include needed (clay, twigs, calfskin rent out the CPU and get back
Michael Chabons The Amazing parchment, etc) needed to create Golem Network Tokens (GNT),
Adventures of Kavalier & Clay, (set the Golem. All you need to do is which are Ethereum crypto coins.
in 1940s Prague and Brooklyn), use your magical ancient Rabbinic Potential uses include users
Jonathan and Jesse Kellermans skills to animate said Golem. being able to create artificial
The Golem of Hollywood (highly Please note! We are looking intelligence (AI) and/or speed
praised by Stephen King) and for a Rabbi to create a Golem: an up its learning processes, make
Helene Weckers The Golem & the anthropomorphic being created large mathematical computations
Jinni; and lets not forget Terry from inanimate matter from and create CGI for movies and
Pratchetts slightly earlier Feet Jewish folk-lore, NOT Gollum: a cartoons quickly and cheaply.5
of Clay. former Hobbit turned into monster The movie Avatar reportedly
and looking for precious. This is cost $237 million to make, much
TV AND YOUTUBE important! We have no interest of the spend being on CGI. Now,
The Golems fame has resulted in living with Gollum. We want 20th Century Fox could use the
in it making guest appearances a Golem. Please respond, serious Golem network and rent out CPU
on popular television shows. A inquiry only. power at a fraction of the cost
male and female Golem appear (and time). So how successful is
in the 2006 Simpsons episode Chinese mythology than Hebrew SCIENCE Golem? On 11 November 2016,
Treehouse of Horror XVII legend.The Golem also appears According to Harry Collins, Golems crowdfunding event
The BBCs Sherlock episode The in computer game Minecraft, Professor of Sociology, and Trevor became the second fastest in
Great Game features an assassin where players break and place Pinch, a Science and Technology crypto history, raising $8,600,000
called the Golem. In the fantasy/ blocks to build structures Professor, Science is a Golem.2 in 29 minutes.The currency since
horror series Supernatural, to protect against nocturnal Referencing Jewish mythology, went on to peak as the 10th most
a Golem is used by a secret monsters. 1 they describe the creature as a valuable crypto coin. 6
association of rabbis in episode humanoid that will follow orders
Everybody Hates Hitler, as KICKSTARTER AND CRAIGSLIST [and] do your work. Czech CONCLUSION
well as turning up in episode The online Kickstarter platform Playwright Karel Capek first From its biblical debut (Psalms
10 of the show Sleepy Hollow. that raises money for creative used the term robot (coined 139:15-16 my unshaped
YouTube animation creators independent projects has by his brother Josef) in his 1920 form) and use as a synonym
such as Sam Green, with his Epic seen some interesting Golem- play R.U.R (Rossums Universal for dummy (possibly as a
Minequest series, and Bootstrap related entries. One of the most Robot). Robot is derived from derivative of gelem, meaning raw
Buckaroo have made comedy successful to date is Golem the Czech word robota, a term material), the Golem appears to
shorts receiving millions of views Arcana, a table-top strategy game that means forced or serf labour. be enjoying a new lease of life: as
featuring Golems. Bootstrap that uses classic miniatures In R.U.R, robots revolt against matter for books, television and
Buckaroos Cooking with the Iron (Golems, Knights and Ancient their masters and destroy films, inspiration for musicals and
Golem features a Golem who Ones) but harnesses your mobile humanity. Collins and Pitch warn festivals, a character in games,
disastrously fails to cook a variety phone or tablet to remove the that without control, a Golem a metaphor for science, and
of foods. hassle of working out points may destroy its masters with its even as a poster-boy for diving
scored, manual record keeping flailing vigour. Nonetheless, equipment.7
MUSIC or even remembering the rules; Pitch and Collins suggest we
A number of bands have taken brilliant! Other successfully dont blame the Golems: their NOTES
the name Golem over the funded Golem projects include mistakes are our own mistakes. 1 For anyone interested in learning
years, ranging from the 1970s a graphic novel by Hilary Interestingly, Gershom Sholem, a how to build Golems in Minecraft
see: www.youtube.com/watch?v=18_
Krautrockers to the current Goldstein, and the sci-fi game scholar and specialist in Jewish AIny76D8
German death metal outfit. New Necropunk Pathfinder. mysticism, discussed the analogy
2 Harry M Collins and Trevor Pinch,
York City boasts a klezmer-rock Craigslist, the classified between the Golem and artificial
The Golem: What You Should Know
band called Golem, formed in advertisements website, has intelligence as early as 1965. About Science, 1993.
2000 and still going strong. Many become a household name. Weird He gave an Israeli mainframe
3 http://cobinagillitt.com/GLM/
influential musicians, including Al Yankovitch wrote a song about computer the name Golem associations/golemaleph.html
Gary Lucas (Jeff Buckley) and it in 2009, but it was in 2010 that Aleph, expressing his hope
Craigslist shocked the world with that the machine would remain 4 www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/
Francis Black (The Pixies), have
PMC1618863/
created their own soundtracks a wanted advert.The advertiser, peaceful. 3 These days, we have
to the original 1920 classic silent from Queens, New York City, GOLEM (Gene Ontology Local 5 www.wired.com/2017/03/initial-
coin-offering-stock-thats-not-stock/;
film. specifically requested: Exploration Map), an interactive, https://steemit.com/beyondbitcoin/@
One Rabbi versed in the Dark graph-based gene-ontology cryptowallet/what-is-golem; https://
GAMES Talmudic Arts to create one Golem navigation and analysis tool golem.network/index.html
The global Japanese anime series for household of three. Golem will software tool for biologists.4 6 https://cointelegraph.com/news/
and trading card game featuring perform rudimentary household golem-is-10th-most-valuable-crypto
Pikachu, Charizard, Blastoise and chores such as dishes & sweeping, CRYPTOCURRENCY
7 www.golemgear.com/
others also features the Golem basic Math Tutoring for our The Golem Network, which
(in both male and female forms), daughter in 3rd grade and basic has been referred to as the 2 MICHAEL BARRON writes
a turtle-like bipedal Pokmon household security. Golem must be AirBnb for computers, offers for XS Noise and has written
with plated green rocks as its obedient and fairly unobtrusive on a decentralised way of providing extensively for the Jewish News
shell that seems to owe more to our every-day lives. large amounts of CPU (central and Essex Jewish News.

FT359 55
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REVIEWS / BOOKS
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A refreshing swig of immortality


An eclectic and fascinating look at Vajrayana Buddhisms secrets exposes an entire culture of
esoteric alchemy and decodes its iconography to reveal elixirs, flying saints and secret languages

Secret Drugs of
and lamaic initiations. Instead,
an early chapter is a delightfully
Amrita, the elixir womens secrets (including
secret languages); the three
Buddhism chatty introduction about himself
and his early drug use, leading
of immortality, great vehicles of entheogenic
Buddhism; the Five Great
Mike Crowley up to the reasons why he adopted is dispensed by a Meats. The final essay in this
Buddhism (and its Vajrayana section on magic pills, their
lama at every
Amrita Press 2016
Pb, 400pp, illus, colour plates, bib, refs, ind, $24.95, variant) as his lifes interest and formulas and ingredients is an
ISBN 9780692652817
astonishing feat of scholarship.
philosophy.
Mike is serious where it is major ritual One involves nearly 300 esoteric
One of the joys of reviewing needed, providing a pretty ingredients (many of which are
books is that once in a while a solid scholarly apparatus: a elixir are rarely discussed and magic pills which have been in
book comes along that not only glossary of unfamiliar words; never explained. Depictions of the presence of holy relics).
strikes out in a new direction but a cultural pre-history showing Tibetan saints flying in the sky, Mike Crowley, with this
also presents new information the interrelationship of the holding a skull-cup of amrita book, pulls aside the curtain
and personal experience in principal countries; and a aloft while embracing their to expose an entire culture of
an absorbing and accessible brilliantly concise account of the naked female counterpart, is but esoteric alchemy, dedicated
manner in this case the genesis of the two main streams one of the iconographic puzzles to the refinement of divine
historical, cultural and ritual use of Buddhism, Mahayana and decoded here. Mike attempts to archetypes within the psyche.
of entheogenic sacraments (i.e. Vajrayana, which evolved out of remedy this sacred ellipsis by It is no wonder that, through
plant extracts that generate the the Buddhas original teachings. deciphering a series of clues from centuries, there has been a
divine within) in chiefly Tibetan Mike is keenly aware of how the iconography of particular steady flow of seekers (including
Vajrayana Buddhism. alien this subject matter might deities, their associated Pythagoras) after many different
Mike Crowley has been a seem to folk coming to it for the meditational instructions, thus forms of knowledge from the
contributor to FT since the early first time, so he even provides identifying the plants or fungi West to India and Tibet. The
days and so the pleasure I feel a guide on how to read the involved, and therefore their correspondences between the
in hailing his work is greater book, and an explanation of the entheogenic properties. Here Grco-Roman and the Indo-
because it originates with one of bewildering alphabet soup that is the real meat of the book: a European pantheons are well
our own indeed, the book is is the transliteration of Tibetan set of closely reasoned known but, as Mike
dedicated to our late pal Steve Chinese and Sanskrit terms. and intensely detailed reminds us, much that is
Moore, who aided Mike with The introduction also prepares and illustrated essays less obvious was hidden
some research and discussions, the reader for some of the key on the interrelated behind the iconography
and who edited an early chapter ideological peculiarities of the elements of literary, of plants and fungi, skulls
of this book when it appeared in practice of Vajrayana tantrism, artistic, mythological, and animal totems. It
Fortean Studies 3 (1996). which differs significantly from hagiographical and may be no coincidence
This book is not the product Vedic (Indian) tantrism. One initiatory clues. There that the earliest
of academic scholarship; it is the of these secrets is the precise is only space here for embodiment of pre-
remarkable result of one mans nature of amrita, the so-called an outline: on amrita itself; Olympic, pre-Titanic Hekate, in
private research, curiosity and elixir of immortality which on the relationship between the Caria of Anatolia (on a main
intelligence. He is clearly at ease is dispensed by a lama at the Vishnu and Rahu, the soma route to India) is as a goddess
with his subject matter whether beginning of every major ritual thief; the eight siddhis (magical of herbs and poisons; along with
it be strange Tibetan gods or and consumed by all participants. powers) and their initiations; the use of fire, this could possibly
the exotic flora of one of the In the Vedic tradition, it was the iconography of peacocks; be our earliest technology. We
remotest regions on Earth and called soma, and corresponded parasol deities; of wheels and might reasonably ask what else
is sharing his own enjoyment of to an essential part of the diet head-bumps; Tibet and its saints those early philosophical tourists
its exotic nature with the reader. of every Hindu god. As Mike as heirs to Indian Buddhism; the brought back that remained a
It may well attract comparisons points out, the word amrita role of dung, urine and other secret teaching. This book
with Carlos Castanedas well- forms part of the title of many unlikely foods; goddesses should excite forteans; it leads
known canon on the use of Vajrayana scriptures, and part and their trees; the dakinis and to profound questions about
plant psychedelics among the of the names of many of its their icons. A concluding section how archaic cultures may have
Hispanic brujos or sorcerers, but deities, as well as describing the holds an equally eclectic set engineered their spirituality, and
Mikes exposition is different. spiritual essence visualised in of essays on subjects including is also a darned good read.
There is no mythologising of his meditations yet the nature, drug sacraments; a guide to Bob Rickard
experience of psychoactive drugs origin and history of this divine psychedelics; the gurus urine; HHHHH

FT359 57
www.forteantimes.com
REVIEWS / BOOKS

Planet Hunters

Go on, give us a smile The Search for Extraterrestrial


Life
Lucas Ellerbroek
Reaktion Books 2017

The quest for pearly gnashers is nothing new, though we no longer see Hb, 268 pp, notes, bib, ind, 16.95, ISBN 9781780238142

them as a sign of mental purity (or as a preventative for Bolshevism) Over the last few
years Ive read
The Smile molars pulled. But they
proved stubborn and, Barnett
Lavater a practitioner of the
then widely accepted idea that
quite a few books
about aspects of the
Stealers recounts, the puller ripped facial characteristics revealed scientific search for
The Fine and Foul Art of away a great deal of the character said that clean, extraterrestrial life,
Dentistry patients upper jaw, knocking white and well-arranged and Ive spotted a
Richard Barnett
a hole through his palate and teeth... [show] a sweet and pattern. With one outstanding
into his nasal passages. When polished mind and a good and exception (Ben Millers brilliant
Thames & Hudson 2016
Hb, 256pp, illus, ind, 19.95, ISBN 9780500519110
the king drank or gargled, honest heart. As late as 1923, The Aliens are Coming!), theyre
fluid came from his nose like an American dentist remarked rather dull. This new book by
a fountain. The kings leading that proper care of the teeth Lucas Ellerbroek, focusing on
For some of us of a certain surgeon used a red-hot iron to obviates the mental explosions the hunt for Earth-like planets
age, Christian Szells torturous close the hole the pain must that cause Bolshevism. around other stars, is a case in
dental procedure on Babe have been horrendous. In 18th century France, point.
Levy in Marathon Man (1976) Some people went to what people began consulting A subject like this ought to
encapsulates our uneasy now seems extraordinary dentists when they were not in be a gift to a popular science
relationship with dentists. Is lengths to replace lost pain to address the perceived writer. Most readers wont need
it safe? still evokes a shudder. teeth. In the 18th century, perils of the ugly mouth persuading that its an important
But we grit our teeth and for instance, dentists made in a society obsessed with area of study that deserves
rely on dentists to manage dentures from teeth pulled surfaces. This strikes me as to have money and resources
or prevent dental from dead soldiers a case of plus a change. Like thrown at it. On top of that, its a
problems. However, or, more commonly, our magazines and TV adverts, perfect example of the scientific
as this wonderful from corpses acquired 18th century publications method.
book shows, dentistry by body snatchers. promoted tooth powders and The basic hypothesis the
is about more than Dentists also whiteners, mouthwashes, existence of exoplanets isnt
medicine: it reflects transplanted live teeth breath sweeteners, toothpicks, directly observable, but some of
and reinforces social pulled from healthy tongue scrapers and its knock-on consequences are. So
norms. but poor people into toothbrushes. you design experiments to look
Barnett, for instance, the rich who paid 10 Yet, Barnett eloquently for these consequences, and then
examines the long search or 20 guineas. The poor got a shows, cosmetic dentistry is build cutting-edge technology,
for effective relief from few coins or at best a couple culturally determined. Tribes like the Kepler spacecraft, to
tooth pain. Some 5,000 years of guineas for a front tooth. in Bopoto, northern Congo, and carry them out.
ago, Chinese medical texts The transplants rarely lasted the Bagobo in the Philippines The excitement lies in the
suggested crushing roast more than a year or two, but traditionally sharpen their how and why of the subject.
garlic between the teeth. The condemned the donor to a teeth. Some Japanese girls and Millers book worked so
crushed garlic was mixed with lifetime of problems. undergo the Yaeba procedure. well because he made a real
horseradish seeds or saltpetre Modern dentistry, of course, The dentists cap the upper effort to explain these aspects.
and human milk to form a goes beyond filling, pulling canine to case a crooked In contrast, Ellerbroek chooses
paste. The patient then pushed and prevention. Dentists tooth that looks a bit like a a plodding historical narrative,
a plug of paste into the nostril perform cosmetic procedures, fang the Japanese associate interspersed with pen-portraits
on the opposite side to the for example, to whiten, a quirky smile with innocence of the ordinary, down-to-Earth
pain. Crushing a raw garlic straighten and reshape teeth. and youthfulness. (read boring) researchers
clove around a sore tooth is a But theres nothing new in the The Smile Stealers is the involved. He never really gets
traditional European remedy search for a perfect smile. latest in a trilogy following to grips with the science or
that Ive used on occasion. For years, people believed The Sick Rose and Crucial engineering of the subject, let
Healers in 15th century Italy that the mouth offered a Interventions (see FT315:61 alone its philosophical or cultural
removed decayed dentine, window into the mind and & 345:58), all of which are implications.
treated the exposed pulp with soul. In the 18th century, packed with fascinating facts The book is also woefully
arsenic, then pressed layers for example, the Swiss and anecdotes, and profusely under-illustrated, with no photos
of gold foil firmly into the physiognomist Johann Kaspar illustrated with images thatll and just one line drawing.
cavity. The filling could save a make you squirm. Theyve been Having had all these tedious
tooth and last for years. But it consistently excellent as well scientists forced on me, I would
took hours and fillings didnt as intellectual and sthetic have liked to see what they
become a dental mainstay delights. look like not to mention the
until the development of And The Smile Stealers is spacecraft and telescopes used
ansthesia. highly recommended as a book to search for exoplanets, and
Early dentistry could, you can ahem really get artists impressions of how they
however, go spectacularly your teeth into. might look if we could see them
wrong. In 1685, Louis XIV Mark Greener properly.
needed his upper right HHHHH Andrew May
HHHHH

58 FT359
www.forteantimes.com
Paperbacks from for anyone who remembers the been well-documented; we before. While the result there
lurid paperback covers of the never really find out why a man was predictably dystopian
Hell boom period. that caused so much upheaval apocalypse, in London one
The Twisted History of 70s and James Holloway in social and religious areas of the side-effects was less
80s Horror Fiction suddenly is almost written out predictable. The Khmer fanatics
HHHHH of history. had little use for international
Grady Hendrix
Marcus does consider the relations, so the Cambodian
Quirk Books 2017
Pb, 234pp, illus, ind, 19.99, ISBN 9781594749810 The Fearless possibility that Benjamin embassy near Regents Park was
Benjamin Lay was viewed as a deformed, abandoned. Until 1976, that is,
The paperback horror boom of hunchback, radical noisy dwarf when a group of enterprising
the 1970s and 1980s unleashed The Quaker Dwarf Who Became and therefore his philosophy squatters took up residence,
a flood of terrifying fiction on the First Revolutionary Abolitionist ridiculed and dismissed. His turning it into one of the last
readers, not just from big names Marcus Rediker humble origins and the flowerings of the hippy era,
like Stephen King, Clive Barker, Verso Books 2017 fact he was self-educated The Guild of Transcultural
Anne Rice or Ramsey Campbell, Hb, 224pp, illus, notes, ind, 17.99, ISBN 9781786634719 may also have had some Studies, a nexus for
but from numerous lesser-known bearing on why society alternative action by hippy
or even pseudonymous writers. The smallest of men can achieve did not take him seriously. survivors.
Some of it was revolutionary, the greatest achievements but His uncompromising Told in a series of lightly
some of it was forgettable, and still be virtually unheard of. personality did not fictionalised anecdotes by
some of it was endearingly Benjamin Ley was a Quaker endear him to his fellow ex-Third Ear Band member
bonkers. And almost all of it dwarf and the first Revolutionary churchmen and his open and veteran International
was adorned with bold, often Abolitionist, yet somehow has criticism of Quakers Times contributor Dave
shocking cover art. been written out of most books owning slaves was seen as Tomlin, Tales from the
The cover art and the loopy on slavery and its abolition. harassment. Ironically, the Embassy is a raconteurial
content are the main Marcus Rediker, author Quakers were in the end history of this counter-
topics of Grady Hendrixs of The Fearless Benjamin pivotal in the abolition cultural institution,
Paperbacks from Hell, an Lay, takes pains to address movement against slavery. from its foundation,
affectionate overview of this injustice. Rediker successfully brings until its eventual demise in
the genre, its history and Born of humble origins back to life in his book the spirit 1991. Featuring many of the
its major figures. In eight in Copford, Essex, he of Benjamin Ley and the little usual suspects from the early
themed chapters and a landed in Barbados and man ahead of his time fighting 70s alternative scene such as
brief appendix, he describes saw the full brutality of slavery, against the injustices of slavery, John Michell, Neil Oram and
the beginning and end of the which changed his view of the a man who encountered much in Harry Fainlight, it provides an
boom and some of its major world and his path in life. his short life but who was firm authentic, if somewhat rambling,
trends, zooming in to examine As a Quaker he fought against in his beliefs that slavery was an picture of the squat, from
particularly significant writers, his own church. What becomes abomination. someone who was at the heart
artists or themes. Most chapters apparent is not only how ahead of Regardless of his stature and of it throughout its existence.
are subdivided into shorter his time his philosophy on slavery somewhat eccentric behaviour, Seemingly insulated from
segments: the chapter on occult was, but also how fearless he was he was ultimately one of the the cultural currents swirling
themes, for instance, includes in his accusations of the Church, first revolutionary abolitionists around it (punk and rave seem
short sections on Jewish themes the government, his fellow and has every right to be to have no effect on the place)
in horror fiction, the importance Quakers and the rich society restored to mainstream history the Embassy provided a last
of Michelle Remembers, race that thrived on the slave trade. books. outpost of 60s idealism and a
consciousness in exorcism His guerrilla tactics included With The Fearless Benjamin refuge for a cast of eccentrics,
fiction, the work of Michael spilling a bladder of blood over Ley, Marcus goes a long way misfits, mystics and dreamers
Avellone, and more. Quaker members and kidnapping towards redressing the wrong. It who appear pseudonymously
The short sections mean that a slave-owners child: Slavery was is a fascinating book about an here (with a dramatis person
this is more of an overview than wrong and it should be abolished indomitable little person with at the back revealing their true
an encyclopdia, something like no matter the cost. Though a huge personality and should identity). It harks back to a time
an art book or exhibit guide. excommunicated from his own be used as a textbook for all when squatting was a viable way
Hendrixs tone complements church in England and at odds those studying slavery and the of life, at least semi-tolerated
this; reading this book is rather with the Philadelphia brethren, abolition of slavery. by officialdom, when you could
like asking a fannish friend to he refused to capitulate. Lena Walton still find something weird and
tell you their favourite funny Despite his diminutive HHHHH interesting in Camden Lock
stories about the object of their height, Benjamin had a huge market, and property in London
obsession. Hendrix sets the personality. He was sometimes was a place where real people
tone with the tale of finding The bull-headed and overzealous, Tales From the lived, not a hotly-contested cash-
Little People, John Christophers but always ahead of his times. Embassy cow for international investors.
underappreciated novel of His life as a sailor had made him Clocking in at nearly 500
Communiques from the Guild of pages, this is perhaps a book only
psychic Nazi sex leprechauns, open-minded: he believed in the
Transcultural Studies 19761991
in a box of discount used books. equality of women and that they cultural historians would want
Dave Tomlin
This humour the affectionate, carried the divine word. to read cover-to-cover, but as it
half-serious teasing of a fan who He eventually wrote his own Strange Attractor Press 2017 is broken up into short and very
Pb, 498pp, 15.99, ISBN 9781907222566
loves how bizarre the subject is book about slavery, All Slave readable anecdotes, it is splendid
runs throughout the book. Keepers that Keep the Innocent In Cambodia, 1975 was Year for dipping into. It is also a
With its lavish illustrations, in Bondage, Apostates, which was Zero, when Pol Pot and the valuable record of the counter-
engaging tone and short, published by Benjamin Franklin. Khmer Rouge swept to power culture by someone who made it
memorable sections, Paperbacks Rediker draws heavily on and did their level best to through with his memory intact.
from Hell is a great introduction primary historical sources. At eradicate every trace of Ian Simmons
to the era and an enjoyable read one stage Lay seems to have the culture that had come HHHHH

FT359 59
www.forteantimes.com
REVIEWS / BOOKS
BOOKS

And with a single leap he was gorn


The latest book on Spring-heeled Jack, Victorian bugaboo turned modern steampunk hero,
is useful for its reproduced original documents, but marred by poor research and analysis

cheap to get. On the very next page investigation by Matthews.


The Mystery Of Matthews readily Matthews unnecessarily Matthews does include some
Spring-Heeled acknowledges that he has says Jerome Clarke and interesting background material
relied heavily on Dashs work. cryptozoologist Loren Coleman about possible mythological
Jack He even reproduces the same claim to have interviewed connections to SHJ (Jack the
From Victorian legend to newspaper articles. The main many of those who sighted giant killer, Jack Frost, Jack
Steampunk Hero benefit of this book is that it the Mothman. Why use OLanterns, etc.) but I feel he
John Matthews makes them more accessible the word claim? Clarke and is stretching the parallels by
Destiny Books 2016 to modern readers and Coleman two of the most including Robin Hood.
Pb, 342pp, illus, notes, ind, bib, $14.99, researchers, but there is little respected fortean researchers The author biography on the
ISBN 9781620554968
else to recommend in it. in the world have travelled back cover states that Matthews
There is some all over the USA for decades to has written over 100 books. That
Spring-heeled Jack coverage of SJH interview witnesses to strange is at the rate of two or more a
(SHJ) is a fortean in popular culture events and to investigate year for his adult life again an
perennial. He was a (including a nice monsters and fortean indication that not much original
classic entity from colour plate in the mysteries firsthand. This sort of research effort could have gone
the Victorian era that centre section of a statement reeks of an armchair into them.
terrified his victims 1960s advertisement expert unfairly criticising the The book also has some
and escaped capture for Spring-heel Jacks researchers who actually get unfortunate typos that suggest
by huge leaps over shoes with springs). their hands dirty out in the it was written in haste.
high walls and between However, basic key field by doing the legwork. These include folly of been
rooftops which led to the word searches at free online Matthews also states that frightened (instead of being)
popular belief that he was a newspaper archives like folklorist Jan Harold Brunvand in an original reproduced
madman inventor who had Trove and Papers Past bring dismissed the Mothman newspaper report and referring
springs in the heels of his up hits on articles about race stories as an urban legend to a popular British radio show as
boots. horses, criminals, circus acts, in his book The Vanishing having a listenership of several
Accurate information about cushioned womens shoes, etc. Hitchhiker (1983). In fact, thousand surely this is meant
SHJ is hard to find. Peter linked with the name none of Brunvand only did that a to be hundreds of thousands?
Hainings The Legend And which are covered in this book. decade later in his 1993 book In summation, The Mystery Of
Bizarre Exploits Of Spring- Matthews also has no The Baby Train. It is important Spring-Heeled Jack is useful to
Heeled Jack (1997) can be mention at all of dozens of to note that Brunvand relied have to get access to the text of
considered an introductory scares involving leaping ghosts upon childrens books about the original newspaper accounts
text but is tainted by colourful (including a Phosphorus Jack) mysteries and a handful of about SHJ and has some nice
exaggerations and, possibly, dating from the late 1800s to newspaper clippings as he was illustrations, but has precious
some accounts entirely the early 1900s. Again, many unable to get hold of a copy of little original thought or research.
fabricated by the author to of these accounts can be found Keels 1975 book The Mothman Those interested in SHJ who
spice the story up. through basic searches of Prophecies. Hardly what could have a limited budget might
The best research work on online newspaper archives. be called in-depth research. be better off looking out for a
SHJ is Mike Dashs Spring- Even more troubling is The 2001 Indian second-hand copy of Fortean
heeled Jack: To Victorian inaccuracies in his coverage of Monkey-man panic Studies Volume 3 or
Bugaboo from Suburban Ghost related entities. In a section that had many might prefer to buy
in Fortean Studies Volume 3 on the Mothman who scared hallmarks of the one of the two recent
(1996). Dash meticulously residents of Point Pleasant, SHJ hysteria is SHJ books available
researched SHJ and included West Virginia, in 1966 and covered in barely on Amazon:
the full text of numerous 1967, he states that John Keel half a page in Spirits of
original newspaper accounts, was accused of faking much scant detail and an Industrial
along with a detailed analysis of his information. Keel may with no references. Age: Ghost
of the reports. He included have lost objectivity when In contrast, the less Impersonation, Spring-
a chronology of sightings he became caught up in the relevant Internet- heeled Jack, and Victorian
and attacks between 1803 excitement and paranoia generated Slender Society by Jacob Middleton
and 1904, and another for while visiting the area and Man meme has (2014) and The Legend of Spring-
comparable entities reported experienced strange events three-and-a- heeled Jack: Victorian Urban
worldwide from the 1930s himself, but he interviewed half-pages of Folklore and Popular Cultures by
to the 1980s. Dashs lengthy multiple witnesses and it is coverage. Yet again Karl Bell (2017).
article is the definitive SHJ completely unfounded to say there is no indication of Peter Hassall
work, but copies of Fortean he created fake Mothman any original
Studies are neither easy nor reports. research or
HHHHH

60 FT359
www.forteantimes.com
The SF and fantasy round-up
David V Barrett recommends an historical novel with a difference, a space opera and a fortean
tale of murder, plus a lost girl mystery, seeing the Good People and Pompeiian time travel

Wonders Will professional storytellers: the


Augustinian canon and alchemist
the air: the dmonic nature of
reality.) The Good People are, of
Dave Hutchinson has,
after many years of
Never Cease George Ripley, who spreads course, the Fair Folk, the Others quiet endeavour, finally
Robert Irwin glorious but entirely made-up or perhaps, today, sightings achieved the acclaim
Dedalus 2016 stories of Woodvilles virtuous of UFOs, often with a spiritual he richly deserves
Pb, 391pp, 9.99, ISBN 9781910213476 exploits, and a certain Sir aspect to the experience. When with his complex and utterly
Thomas Malory, whose tales of two women in west London see believable novels of a fractured
chivalrous valour interweave a strange cube in the sky in Europe (Europe in Autumn and
The Rift Woodvilles own narratives the summer of 1989, their lives its sequels). Acadie is totally
Nina Allan real, visionary and fictional. Its are turned upside down. We different from his usual work: a
Titan Books 2017 easy for the reader to become follow them as they try to come delightful space opera novella.
Pb, 421pp, 7.99, ISBN 978178560376 confused and thats the point. to terms with what they saw, The narrator Duke is the
How many historical accounts interpreting it in very different unwilling president of a small
are massively mythologised, ways and how their inexplicable colony of spacefarers who left
The Good People and is myth sometimes more experience changes the way they Earth behind centuries ago; many
Patrick Harpur meaningful than reality? Fortean view the world and affects their of them have adapted themselves
Strange Attractor Press 2017 questions indeed. relationship with others. Harpurs physically. When they shoot down
Hb 256pp, 25, Pb, 256pp, 12.99, ISBN 9781907222405 writing style, slow and measured, a small probe that comes into
More confusion of really quite formal, takes some their space, they know that Earth
reality. Teenager Julie getting used to; but its worth the has finally found them; Duke has
Empire of Time disappears, leaving effort. to organise a mass evacuation of
Daniel Godfrey her younger sister the entire colony before Earth
Titan Books 2017 Selena and their Many of the population sends ships to wipe them out.
Pb, 464pp, 7.99, ISBN 9781785653155 parents struggling to cope with of Pompeii were rescued But when another Earth probe
her loss. Has she run away, or just before the eruption arrives, is all as it seems?
was she abducted or murdered? of Vesuvius in Daniel Often I complain that a novel
Acadie Could she, somehow, still be Godfreys New Pompeii, is too long; Id have liked this one
Dave Hutchinson alive, as her father obsessively and brought forward in time to a to be much longer its great fun,
Tor 2017 hopes? Twenty years later recreated city today. In the sequel with a superb kick in the tail.
Pb, 99pp, 8.99, ISBN 9780765398260 Serena receives a phone call; Empire of Time, 15 years later,
Julie is back, with a story of Nick Houghton has the role of Self-published books
having fallen through a rift into ambassador between the city and are becoming more
The Paranormal another world literally another the outside world, visiting nearby and more common, so
Investigations of planet, which she describes Naples frequently, but spends lets end with a novel
in some detail its people, its most of his life living in New with clear fortean
Mr Charles Fort places, its differences from Pompeii as Decimus Horatius connections. In TE Scotts The
TE Scott life on Earth. Is it really Julie? Pullus. The most powerful woman Paranormal Investigations of
via amazon 2016 How can Serena be sure? Her in New Pompeii, Calpurnia, is Mr Charles Fort a young civil
Pb, 211pp, 8.99, ISBN 9781532708831 memories check out, but her trying to get the time-travelling servant is employed by a British
story is impossible or is it? Nina equipment working again so she government department to
Robert Irwins Allans intriguing second novel can rescue her husband from the work with Fort as consultants to
beautifully written The Rift, like her first, explores past; her teenage son Marcus and investigate possibly paranormal
Wonders Will the nature of conflicting realities her bodyguard have ambitious murders, shortly after the First
Never Cease is an and unreliable (or perhaps plans of their own. And who World War.
historical novel multiverse) narration. Just who is sending messages from the The interaction between the
with a difference. All the is Julie? future? Bringing anyone forward two characters is often amusing;
characters and historical events from the past could rewrite Forts arrogance, short temper
are real, but beyond that Patrick Harpur is well history, and Nick/Pullus is caught and odd sense of humour seem
Anthony Woodville (brother known to FT readers as between different increasingly quite believable, and one feels for
of Elizabeth, who married the the author of Dmonic brutal factions in both of his his long-suffering wife.
new King of England, Edward Reality: a Field Guide worlds a slaves life has little The cases are interesting
IV) dies in battle, seeing a to the Otherworld. The value, and assassination has long and the storytelling fairly good,
vision of a sacred procession Good People could be seen as been a useful tool in Roman but the book suffers badly
before he comes back to life. a novelisation of that ground- democracy. Its a more satisfying from many of the usual problems
Throughout the book he has breaking work. (A maverick read than the first book, though of self-published books: poor
other visions, travels, strange priest in the novel suggests there are some irritatingly untied layout, copy-editing and
encounters. But he also meets giving a talk on Demons of loose ends. proof-reading.

FT359 61
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REVIEWS / FILMS
SEND REVIEW DISCS TO: BOOK REVIEWS, FORTEAN TIMES, PO BOX 71602, LONDON E17 0QD, UK.

A win for the Losers Club


An accomplished blend of nostalgia and terror (not to mention a nightmare for coulrophobes), this
latest adaptation succeeeds in capturing the essence of one of Stephen Kings best-loved books

the kids of The Losers Club.


The young cast and their
dynamic are essential in making
the film work, and while the
kids of the miniseries were also
memorable and relatable, the
Losers in the new It are allowed
more depth, putting their
chemistry and performances
on a par with those of Stand
by Me, Super 8 and, indeed,
Stranger Things.They behave
and speak like real kids, with
plenty of expletives and crude
jokes from Wolfhards Richie
Tozier in particular, and their
mannerisms never feel forced.
Richie is not the main character,
though, and the three Losers
awarded the most screen time
and character development
are all very impressive. Jaeden
Lieberher leads the pack as
stuttering Bill Denborough, with

It Word of a new lack of his presence in the second


part makes it incredibly cheesy.
another great performance that
further attests to his talent. Jack
Dir Andy Muschietti, US 2017
On UK release
adaptation was The lasting impact and
popularity of Tim Currys
Dylan Grazer is also good as
Eddie Kaspbrak, serving as the
met with much Pennywise meant that word preppy, hypochondriac contrast
As I was a kid in the 1990s, of a new adaptation of Kings to Wolfhards wise-cracking
there are certain pop-culture scepticism behemoth shocker was met with loudmouth Richie, with whom
phenomena that will always stay much scepticism. However, as Grazer constantly and sassily
with me. From the one-liners from the release date drew nearer and spars. Sophia Lillis channels
Terminator 2: Judgment Day being the first episode airing Monday the marketing campaign worked Molly Ringwald as she breathes
quoted to death during recess night at 10pm after the evening its magic, people began to warm new life into Beverly Marsh,
to rushing home from school to news and the second episode to the idea of a new, R-rated portraying her as a multi-faceted
catch the latest episode of Are at the same time the following take on the horror classic, and It character who is both confident
You Afraid of the Dark?, I have evening.Thus, kids would arrive thankfully succeeds well beyond and vulnerable, thereby adding
as many rose-tinted memories at school Tuesday morning with clever marketing and increased renewed depth to the heart-
of Nineties film and TV as most a sombre look on their face after gore. Being updated to take place breaking reality of Beverlys
of my generation; and Im sure an uneasy nights sleep thanks to in the late 1980s, there were home life.
that many of my peers will also Tim Currys iconic, coulrophobia- understandable concerns that As for Bill Skarsgrds portrayal
be able to recall how they were inducing performance. However, the film was merely going to be of Pennywise, those who are
traumatised by the TV miniseries if they decided to brave the a cash grab riding the successful familiar with his other work know
Stephen Kings It. I remember second half of the miniseries, nostalgia train currently led by that this versatile actor is not only
seeing it several times, but I also they would arrive at school with Stranger Things; but this concern talented, but also fearless and
remember that it was popular for a different facial expression on also turns out to be groundless. invested in his work. Skarsgrd
kids to dare each other to watch Wednesday morning: namely one While It even shares one of its does not seek to paraphrase Tim
it. Sure enough, most kids cockily of disappointment. As good as the main cast members with Stranger Currys performance, instead
accepted the challenge and often first part of the miniseries is, the Things, in the form of Finn making this incarnation of
came to regret it.You see, the second half is a letdown, mainly Wolfhard, the film stands on its the killer clown entirely his
Danish national broadcasting because Tim Curry was the own merits and captures the own brand of eerie, unsettling,
service would show two-part heart and soul of an otherwise essence of Kings novel, making it weird and scary. It is therefore
miniseries every week, with mediocre production, and the easy for the audience to invest in not a case of who is the better

FT359 63
www.forteantimes.com
REVIEWS / FILMS

Pennywise, but rather which


THE REVERENDS REVIEW Alex North score), and
its great fun to finally see
performance you prefer. It should
also be noted that where Currys
it; especially when you Pennywise was the focal point of
FTs resident man of the cloth REVEREND PETER LAWS realise how inuential it the miniseries, many other forms
dons his dog collar and faces the flicks that Church was on the decade that of It get screentime in the new
forgot! (www.theflicksthatchurchforgot.com) followed. The massive wave film, which means the audience
of nature attacks movies doesnt get to explore Skarsgrds
(Jaws, Grizzly, Piranha et al) performance as thoroughly as that
Willard/Ben and nerd revenge movies of Curry.
Dir Daniel Mann, US 1982/Phil Karlson, US 1972
(Carrie, Evilspeak, Bad While the film boasts several
Second Sight, 34.99 (Ltd edition box set), 19.99
Ronald) probably found their great elements, its far from
each (Blu-ray), 15.99 each (DVD)
source here. Willard looks faultless. Where the novel jumped
surprisingly good in HD, too. back and forth between The
When a radio station plays The sequel, Ben, cranks Losers Club as children and
the Michael Jackson track up the rat attacks and brings grown-ups, the film focuses solely
Ben, it feels right at home in in a lonely little boy with a on the children, perhaps leaving
the love-song hour. Its got a bad heart. Hes best friends the adults bout with the evil of
gentle feel, a pretty melody with the chief-rat, Ben, and Derry to be addressed in an as of
and the lyrics are sweet: I even writes a pretty song in yet unscheduled sequel. While the
used to say, I and me. Now its his honour having no idea more linear format, focusing on
us now its we. Aww. Many that Ben and his chums are a single era, eliminates the risk
listeners, however and chewing peoples eyes out of tonal confusion and ensures
this goes for all you karaoke across town. The sequel also a smooth progression of events,
crooners too will have
no idea theyre hearing, or
You made me employs a bizarre technique,
which Ive never seen before.
it also becomes part of the films
pacing issue. As the kids each
singing, a ballad addressed hate myself! But I When the carnage happens get their terrifying encounter
to a homicidal rat. Welcome and the police turn up, we with one of Its many forms, these
to the weird world of Willard like myself now! see crowds of people staring become almost a montage, doing
and Ben, a pair of killer in complete silence. Honestly. less and less to move the narrative
rodent movies that lit up the It lasts for ages. Is the film along.
world box office almost 50 rebel. You made me hate saying that we humans are Pacing issues aside, It manages
years ago and have barely myself! Willard tells his little better the horde of to be a fun, engaging and heartfelt
been seen since. This new boss. But I like myself hungry feeders, or was it story about friendship, coming
Blu-ray release is the first now! Stephen King once just some quirk to add to the of age and facing your fears
time either film has appeared called this most chilling line running time? Whatever the and one of the best Stephen
on home video since they in the movie, and I think reason, I liked it. In the end, King adaptations thus far. While
screened in cinemas in 1971 hes right. Willard and Ben wont blow the horror occasionally relies
and 1972. But strike up the Its a strange film by you away, but theyre left-field on jump-cuts and hyperactive
bandbecause the rats are any standard like an enough to make an impact; editing, it is mostly done well,
back! exploitation wolf lurking not least because they help with a few genuinely jaw-dropping
Willard, the first and in big Hollywood clothes reclaim the dirty horror DNA sequences bringing to mind some
most solid movie, has Bruce (it even has a big, lush of a karaoke classic. of the most creative scares from
Davison playing the titular A Nightmare On Elm Street. All in
young man, and boy is he all, It very definitely oats, and
put-upon. Ten minutes in and the amount of heart and skill
we already know Willards it showcases suggests that any
life sucks. His sweaty sequels will likely oat too.
and grizzled boss (Ernest Leyla Mikkelsen
Borgnine) only keeps him on HHHHH
because Willards dad once
owned the company. Hes just
itching for an excuse to fire Mother!
him. Then we meet his freaky Dir Darren Aronofsky, US 2017
mum (Elsa Lanchester, no On UK release
less) and her elderly friends
the only guests at Willards Darren Aronofsky has described
birthday party. All they do is writing the script for Mother!
nag him about being a better (over a period of five frenzied
man. Hes so desperate for days) as a fever dream, which
non-judgmental friends that is coincidentally also a rather
its no surprise when he starts apt description of what it feels
hanging out with the house like to watch his latest effort.
rats. And soon, these rodents The film tells a strange yet
will give him the confidence compelling story that is incredibly
(and practical help) to finally confrontational, not only in
terms of its cinematography
and imagery, but also in terms

64 FT359
www.forteantimes.com
of how it challenges the viewer. entirety of its runtime, as even the
By dealing with themes such as
privacy, idolatry and the pitfalls
briskest trip to the bathroom or
concession stand leaves you at risk DVD
of interpersonal relationships, the of missing a twist or turn, leaving
viewers own perceptions become you completely lost as to how THE LOCH
part of the viewing experience, everything managed to escalate
ITV Studios, 12.99 (DVD)
which makes watching the film a this much beyond comprehension
very subjective affair. in just a few minutes. Teenagers lay out bones and guts on the shore of Loch Ness, as
Mother! takes its time to build Additionally, those who are the spoof remains of the Monster. But amongst the animal offal
its mounting layers of surreal expecting a horror film in the more is a human heart The local piano teacher is found dead at the
unease and mystery, at times traditional sense may also leave bottom of a cliff and the autopsy reveals that part of his brains
raising the question of how much feeling dissatisfied. Love it or hate been removed And in the opening title sequence of The Loch, a
of what is happening is actually it, Aronofsky has undoubtedly body is seen weighted down by a curling stone below the waves
real and how much is potentially created something quite special A serial killer is at large in the fictional town of Lochnavoy. DCI
hallucinated by Jennifer with Mother!, which merits Lauren Quigley (Siobhan Finneran, embittered ladys maid OBrien
Lawrences character. Much as multiple viewings to even begin to in Downton Abbey) is brought in to head the enquiry, overriding local
Rosemarys Baby unfolded from comprehend the full extent of its DCI Frank Smilie (John Sessions, in just about everything) and she
the point of view of Mia Farrows meanings and metaphors. brings with her psychological profiler Blake Albrighton (Don Gilet, 55
Degrees North, Eastenders) whose smart theories and publicity-
character, Mother! unfolds from Leyla Mikkelsen
seeking approach alienate everyone.
the perspective of Jennifer HHHHH At the heart of the series is DS Annie Redford (Laura Fraser,
Lawrences; we are constantly
Neverwhere, Florence Nightingale, Breaking Bad). She knows
either following directly behind
her or seeing her react to the Kedi everyone in the town; her husband Alan runs a monster-spotting
tourist boat, and her daughter Evie is one of the three students
increasingly frustrating behaviour Dir Ceyda Torun, Turkey 2016
creating the fake monster remains and causing her mother
of her husband and the mysterious Amazon Video from 23 October
problems throughout the series; Quigley asks Annie, What are you
guests that continue to arrive at
at this moment? A mother or a police officer? before temporarily
their house. As a result, we know Cat-lovers and Turkophiles (Ill throwing her off the case. Annie is the local girl with local
as little as she does, and the heavy admit to both) will probably get knowledge, doing most of the worthwhile work while the others are
use of close-ups and Steadicam the most out of this charming, too busy sniping at each other.
pulls the audience completely into beautifully shot evocation of Immediately suspect are two people who clearly have things to
the film, forcing them to try and Istanbul and its street cats, but hide, Dr Simon Marr (John Heffernan, Dickensian, Ripper Street)
process any given event occurring theres much here for forteans too: and the creepy principal of the Sixth Form College, Craig Petrie
on the screen. for one thing, its fascinating to (Alistair Mackenzie, Archie in Monarch of the Glen). But there are
The performances further drive hear other cultures takes on the other possible suspects, including another tour operator, Leighton
home the odd mix of plausible great feline mysteries. Do cats Thomas (William Ash, Being Eileen, Great Night Out), who it turns
reality and hellish nightmare, really help people by absorbing out is a reformed double murderer.
as the various characters slowly and dissipating their bad human There are some great actors here, but theyre let down by
become exaggerated versions of energies? Are cats aware of the their characters. The suspects are all too obviously suspicious;
various personality types that existence of God, while dogs the clashing personalities of the detectives are overplayed. The
most of us have crossed paths with arent? (The canine dimwits think teenage students, who should be at the heart of the story but
at some point. Michelle Pfeiffer were deities, after all.) Are we are oddly peripheral to it for most of the time, are particularly
makes an impressive return to here to care for cats in a fitting unconvincing as much the fault of the direction as of the actors,
the big screen as a particularly echo of divine love, or are they who seem to be doing the best they can with the roles theyve been
obnoxious character with a here to allow us the occasional given.
subtly menacing undertone, and glimpse of the eternal? The good It begins as an intriguing story, and is enjoyable enough, but it
while Pfeiffer and the rest of citizens of Istanbul all have their becomes less so as it goes on. There are too many false trails, too
the cast do very well as a whole, own, often eccentric, opinions on many characters you are purposely led to dislike and suspect of
the standout performance is such weighty questions, and many, being the killer. Both the body count and the red herrings increase
undoubtedly that of Lawrence; she too, have stories of saving and as the series continues. The revelations in episode six are clever
manages to convey the confusion being saved by these proud and and convoluted but not really convincing. The whole thing tries far
and frustration of her character independent moggies like the too hard. But full marks for the stunning scenery the one thing not
without losing any of the humanity luckless fisherman whose life had in the writers and directors control. Beauty of nature, eh. Bores
necessary for the audience to hit rock bottom before a persistant the living shit out of me, says Quigley in episode one; but its the
invest in such an intense role, puss led him to a wallet stuffed best part. David V Barrett H H H H H
easily making this the best with cash; now he cares for all the
performance of her career thus far. feline waifs and strays that come PHOENIX FORGOTTEN
There is much to take away his way.The cats, too, are a diverse
Signature Entertainment, 7.99 (DVD)
from Mother! and mull over once and indiviualistic bunch, living a
the end credits roll, as the film hard knock life on the margins of Yes, its 2017 and theyre still making found footage movies about
is brimming with allegory and society. young kids going missing under strange circumstances. Here, three
teens vanish after the famous Phoenix Lights appear over Arizona,
symbolism. While some viewers Kedi is a touching, funny and
so one of their sisters sets out to make a documentary and find the
will enjoy the abstract, absurdist often poetic portrait of a great
truth. Its fairly slow, and the real-life actors feel like theyre acting,
two-hour ride, this will be a city, its people, and, of course, its but by the films end youll get your dose of flashing lights and dusty
drawback for others, who may find countless cats. Its also, in the end, winds. I guess if youve somehow never seen a found-footage film
the experience beyond tedious. It a film about love in its many forms. before, this could be pretty gripping, but for the rest of us, theres a
should also be noted that the films David Sutton serious sense of dj vu about it all. PL H H H H H
weird and winding story requires HHHHH
you to remain in your seat for the

FT359 65
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REVIEWS / PODCASTS

SOUNDS PECULIAR BRIAN J ROBB PRESENTS THE FORTEAN TIMES PODCAST COLUMN

A frequent guest, no doubt

A
s a medium, podcasts have been enjoying something of a boom over the past few years. familiar to FT readers, is
The democratisation of quality media production through high-specification computer Richard Wiseman, Professor
equipment has allowed a plethora of previously marginalised voices their own access to of the Public Understanding
what were once quaintly called the airwaves. of Science at the University
In the past, broadcasting (reaching a wide audience from a single source) was heavily of Hertfordshire. As well as
regulated and controlled, mainly through frequency scarcity: only those authorised or licensed appearing on the episodes
to have access to the airwaves were allowed to broadcast. In UK terms that, initially, meant the on the supernatural and
BBC, with commercial stations coming along in the 1960s. irrationality, he featured on the
In terms of radio, there have been amateurs since the invention of the medium, reaching a 2012 Christmas Special, as
crescendo with the offshore pirate pop stations of the 1960s that ultimately led to the BBC well as taking part in episodes
launching Radio 1. For the longest time, Radio 4 (or NPR in the US) has been the default home on deception (#57) and the
of quality spoken word content, whether that was drama, current affairs, or documentary radio. science of sleep (#79). This
Now, anyone with a microphone and an iPad, laptop, or computer and the right software year he appeared on an
can produce a decent podcast and launch their work onto a waiting world. Not all of them are episode (#85) titled How to
good, while many are far better than you might expect, sometimes surpassing the productions Beat the House and Win at
of legitimate broadcasters like the BBC or NPR. When it comes to fortean topics, there are a Games.
host of podcasts out there, ranging from the polished and compelling to the amateurish and Other guests have included
downright weird. SOUNDS PECULIAR is your insider guide to the best of the current podcasts comedians Ben Miller (who
dealing with fortean topics: all you have to do is sit back and listen... studied for a PhD in physics),
Chris Addison, Mark Steel,
Alexei Sayle, Stephen Fry, Sara
disposable radio broadcast, of the scientists, who are Pascoe, and Jon Culshaw.
with the added advantage that forced then to explain the Scientists who have brought
listeners can listen at their topic under discussion at a the information to supplement
own convenience. level that listeners can easily the entertainment have
The Infinite Monkey Cage latch on to. The show has won included such well-known
began almost a decade ago, in a variety of awards, including names as Seth Shostak,
2009, presented by the BBCs a Gold Award at the radio Professor Steve Jones, Simon
favourite scientist Professor industry Sony Awards in 2011. Singh, Dr Kevin Fong, and
Brian Cox (not the Scottish Across its 95 episodes Professor Richard Dawkins.
actor) and stand up comedian The Infinite Monkey Cage has Episodes in the most recent
Robin Ince. The pair spark tackled the links between series of particular fortean
off each other effectively, science and science fiction interest include What Particles
Podcast: The Infinite Monkey with Ince as informed about (#7, a 2010 episode which remain to be discovered?
Cage science as Cox is inspired by included Jonathan Ross and (#90), Will insects inherit the
www.theinfinitemonkeycage. comedy. Their relationship Alan Moore as guests); the Earth? (#93), and Are we
com provides much of the ongoing possibility of the apocalypse living in a simulation? (#94).
Host: Professor Brian Cox, humour. Over the years, a (#9); the role of randomness
Robin Ince series of long-running jokes in life (#11); becoming Strengths: The relationship
Episode Count: 95 have built up, including Inces an astronaut (#15; #91); between Cox and Ince is the
Format: Round table Carl Sagan impersonation and space tourism (#39); and heart of the show; they have
discussions of science with a his repeated mocking of Coxs the connection between an easy-going, occasionally
trio of guests hair. scientific advancement and snarky relationship that offers
a doorway to the science.
Established: 2009 A trio of relevant guests join warfare (#52). Alan Moore
Frequency: Seasons of six- the presenters on each show, has returned twice (to date) Weaknesses: Sometimes the
seven episodes, twice yearly often a pair of scientists who to discuss cosmology (#16), science element is not done
Topics: All aspects of science specialise in the topic at hand and accessing the doors of justice as the focus is on the
and the scientific method and a comedian to bring a perception through drug use funny; its rare, but it has
happened.
lighter touch to the material. (#44).

T
he extended podcast The show is recorded in front Fortean topics have Recommended Episodes: #2
(which began in 2013, of a live studio audience at included mysticism and Extraterrestial Life (with Jon
although all back the Radio Theatre in the BBCs rationality (#17); Science Ronson); #11 Randomness
episodes are now available) Broadcasting House in London, vs the Supernatural (#18); (with Tim Minchin); #29
Parallel Universes (with
of the BBCs irreverent radio which brings a degree of Science Mavericks (#26);
Professor Sir Martin Rees);
science show The Infinite spontaneity to what otherwise Parallel Universes (#29);
#31 Space Exploration (with
Monkey Cage usually includes could have been a dry Improbable Science (#32); Sir Patrick Stewart); #60
about 10-15 minutes of exploration of the given topic. What is Death? (#37); and When Quantum Goes Woo
additional material cut from The mix of comedy and Irrationality (#55). There (with Ben Goldacre); #81 200
the live recording to fit the science makes the science have been various special Years of Frankenstein (with Sir
30-minute broadcast slot on accessible, with the guest live episodes from science Christopher Frayling).
Radio 4. This gives added comedians often put in the festivals across the UK, and in Verdict: A rare successful mix
value to the podcast over position of asking the obvious, summer 2015 the show toured of entertainment and solid
and above the slightly more difficult, or irreverent questions major cities in the US. science discussion.

66 FT359
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LETTERS
CONTACT US BY POST: BOX 2409 LONDON NW5 4NP OR E-MAIL SIEVEKING@FORTEANTIMES.COM
PLEASE PROVIDE US WITH YOUR POSTAL ADDRESS

Jet trade
Conspiracy comfort
I wonder what the net result of
SIMULACRA CORNER The trade in Whitby jet
[FT357:40] predates theVicto-
higher paranoia [FT357:52-53] is rian era by at least 3,000 years.
for the paranoiac. At times I see At the side of our house at the
that the existence of a supposed mouth of the Angus Glens are the
conspiracy is all that is required remains of a tumulus. When this
for emotional fulfilment. All was excavated in 1919, amongst
the facts and outrage are not other items, there were found
actually intended to initiate 98 barrel-shaped jet beads and
corrective action such as removal spacer plates that are thought
of the reptilians from power.The to have comprised a necklace
contrailists get great satisfaction and bracelet. X-ray fluorescence
from the idea that some sort of spectroscopy showed that these
mass gassing is taking place every beads were of Whitby jet.The
day (what exactly the evil gas is interesting question is what did
supposed to do or why it some- the inhabitants of this area have
how doesnt effect the contrailist to trade for what must have been
is apparently beside the point). a very expensive product when it
However, they never seem really to arrived in Angus? One suggestion
care about uncovering the physical made to me is that it could have
mechanisms needed to achieve been fresh-water pearls, which are
this ongoing operation. Perhaps still found in the area.
actual investigation, as opposed to One final point: whilst Whitby
armchair cherry-picking of facts, is perhaps the best known area
isnt conductive to the continued related to Bram Stoker, we
mental thrill of the conspiracy. shouldnt forget that the east
This is not to ignore actual coast of Scotland also has its
movements that have caused im- claims; specifically that the
mense harm and violence through model for Castle Dracula was
fantasy dogma. Slains at Cruden Bay. Supporters
William Hohauser of Slains Castle claim early drafts
By email of the novel had Dracula landing
at Cruden Bay, and have accused
Terrifying tree Whitby of luring vampire fans
Two critics Robson Bolam from Telford in Shropshire sent us this photograph of a under false pretences.
I never thought FT would become scary tree from Stowlangtoft in Suffolk. Philip Bolt
a witless, trite, dishonest and We are always glad to receive pictures of spontaneous forms Redhall, Tayside
unfair left-wing propaganda and figures, or any curious images. Send them (with your postal
machine. But, that is what you two address) to Fortean Times, PO Box 2409, London NW5 4NP or to
[David Sutton and Paul Sievek- sieveking@forteantimes.com.
Give Peas a chance
ing] have turned it into.The latest I thought you might like this ap-
Fortean Library article [Help! parent example of a false memory.
Help! The paranoids are after me Ive read every issue of FT, tributors might feel their audi- I wonder if it widely afflicts others
by the Hierophants Apprentice, and in recent months, Ive seen ence agrees with them, and be and thus categorised with the
FT357:52-53] was unforgivably several offhand (and com- emboldened to go further. Mandela Effect.
one-sided and flat out wrong. pletely irrelevant) comments Paul Cornell My partner and I were travel-
Please inform the author that he like this sneaking in, from By email ling north on the M25 and passed
is not worthy to suck the s**t out several contributors, such as an under the bridge with the graffiti
of Joseph McCarthys ass.You can out-of-the-blue rant about the GIVE PEAS A CHANCE. We
continue to enjoy your fagtard impossibility of the discipline of
Local hermit spoke of it fondly: Ah, thats
circle jerk but, after 25 years, Im feminist glaciology (youll keep You state that Denisova Cave in been there for years and years,
gone. F**k you! an open mind about bigfoot, but Siberia is named after the Deniso- hasnt it? I claimed to remember
John Guerrasio not about that), in a UFO column van people [FT357:14]. However, it from about 2000 when I was
By email of all places [FT355:28], to that its the other way around: the making the journey more regular-
borderline fascistic forum piece people are named after the cave, ly. How long had it actually been
In a review of A Cabinet of Ancient about rodent eugenics, which which is itself named after local there, we wondered. I discounted
Medical Curiosities [FT357:62] was utter nonsense presented hermit St Denis, who inhabited any connection with the John
Barry Baldwin says the book pul- as if from a position of authority it in the 18th century. Otherwise Lennon song, and concluded the
lulates with transgenders without [FT356:56-57, duly criticised in a brilliant article (first Id heard 1980s, perhaps.
any prattling about their rights FT358:75-77]. of the bracelet).Thank you for Some Googling later, we turned
(rights in inverted commas). But All in all, its like watching a continuing to produce by far and up some photos showing PEAS
actually thats just rights, without friend succumb to the fears and away the best magazine in the only, but cars travelling past with
the speech marks. And that view- hatreds that can arise from old English language. number plates as modern as 2008.
point contributes to why so many age. I love FT, and I feel that Nicholas Southwell A 2009 post on a forum discusses
trans people die every year. if I dont speak up, these con- Penzance, Cornwall the recent addition of the other

FT359 71
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LETTERS

words, so (barring considerable much of that generation (born scattered First World War battle- Jacques Vallee
conspiracy) theres every reason 1960) and being very fond of field. One volume has its pages
to believe its our memories at music from Ghost Box et al. I am numbered using sheep counting In her discussion of the contri-
fault, and the sign is less than sure my early experience of the numbers een, teen, tuther, bution that Dr J Allen Hynek
10 years old. Id have put a lot of unsettling side of late 1960s/ futher, fip The book design (1910-1986) made to ufology,
money on it being much older. early 1970s youth culture was is classic 1960s education mod- Jenny Randles [FT357:25] refers
I mentioned the bridge to my important to my subsequent ap- erne, as so effectively spoofed by to the French-American scientist
colleague at work who also uses preciation of forteana. Ghostbox, Scarfolk etc, and the Dr JacquesVallee. She states that,
the road infrequently (though I was surprised, however, feel so perfectly hauntological unlike the late Hynek,Vallee isnt
more regularly than I do), and that neither the article on that the term could have been a hard science man.Thats a
unprompted he immediately hauntology nor the subsequent invented for them. slightly odd assertion, because
blurted out the same impression: correspondence picked up on Ian Simmons Vallee has degrees in maths, as-
Thats been there for decades! two things that seemed to me Monkseaton, Tyne and Wear trophysics and computer science,
He also smiled at recalling it. I to be central to my experience and he worked as a computer
wonder if the fondness for this as a member of the Haunted I was very interested by the scientist.
silly landmark has something to Generation; firstly, school letters about The Haunted Randles goes on to state that
do with its effect. I also wonder country dancing. At primary Generation [FT354:30-37]. I was Vallee became the architect
whether commuters whove seen school we used to have country born in 1958, but can still relate of a new, psychosocial ufology,
it every day would have a more dancing lessons, something that to the era from a slightly older whose flagship journal was the
accurate impression of when it had been introduced to schools perspective Pan horror story UK-published Magonia. Now,
appeared. in the 1950s, or possibly earlier, anthologies, late night movies the latter may have borrowed its
Rhiannon Davies by Cecil Sharp and associates, on BBC2 etc. the Mark Gatiss name from one ofVallees books,
Bradford on Avon, Wiltshire and which saw my classmates generation, if you will. (Remem- Passport to Magonia (1969), but
and I careering round the ber Black Aquarius?) And I think the psychosocial hypothesis
Editors note: The Edwardian school hall doing reels, jigs and its largely because everyone (PSH) that Magonia espoused
bridge in question is between strathspeys to scratchy Percy over 30 in 1970 had first- or and is still promoted, via its
junctions 16 and 17 of the Grainger records played over a second-hand knowledge of the online continuation http://peli-
M25, near Uxbridge. Peas was large speaker while the teacher period 1914-45, one of the most canist.blogspot.co.uk/ hardly
reportedly the name of a London called the steps. It was all rather traumatic in world history, and reflects the published views of
graffiti artist. The words give Wicker Man. I seem to remem- this suppressed trauma leaked, JacquesVallee.
and a chance were added ber this continued until it was oozed, and dripped into popular Advocates of the PSH favour
later, with the amended graffiti replaced by the differently pecu- culture, whilst at the same time prosaic explanations of anoma-
thought to refer to his frequent liar Music and Movement, which the grown-ups tried to tell the lous experiences, construing
arrests, according to an historic has already been mentioned in a under-20s that everything was them in terms such as mispercep-
building report by Oxford Archae- Hauntological context. exactly as it should be.This tion, misinterpretation, fantasy-
ology. The Peas tag can be The second thing was a series disjunction between what we proneness, and hoaxing.Vallee,
seen in several places, particu- of poetry books called Voices, sensed and what we were taught on the other hand, contends that
larly on other bridges. The bridge aimed at upper primary and was largely what gave the era its many UFO incidents have been
has its own Facebook page with lower secondary children.These strange atmosphere... genuinely enigmatic. In his book
about 6,500 followers. [BBC were extraordinary volumes, Janet Wilson Dimensions: A Casebook of Alien
News, 20 Aug 2017.] and I still own copies today. By email Contact (Souvenir Press, 1988,
In them you could find Sylvia pp288-289) he states that his
Plath, WB Yeats, Carl Sandburg, In reference to Albert Raveys belief is that the UFO phenom-
The Haunted William Blake and John Clare letter [FT357:74], responding enon is one of the ways through
Generation all together next to traditional to The Haunted Generation which an alien form of intelli-
folksongs, poems written by (We have gone from being an gence of incredible complexity is
I have really enjoyed the recent children, limericks, the text of a island of mystery and weirdness communicating with us symboli-
stuff FT has run on hauntology mummers play and translations to being a prosaic, materialistic cally (Vallees emphasis). How-
[FT357:74-76], having been very from Japanese, Chinese and place): never was a truer ever, he doesnt think that this
Sanskrit verse.These statement made! The grim forces intelligence is extraterrestrial.
were accompanied by of self-conformity are sadly in (Incidentally, Vallees books
reproductions of Bosch the ascendant, and more insidi- published in the USA drop the
engravings, Hiroshoge ous than ever. However, maybe acute accent from his surname.)
prints, grim street a solution does exist. A number Peter A McCue
photography the cover of naturalists are nowadays By email
of one volume featured committed to the re-wilding of
a photo of a shattered the British landscape; perhaps
fire escape silhouetted as forteans we should be working
Mrtenitsa
against the sky, another toward a re-weirding of our To answer Daniel Holmess ques-
a skull, a candle and island? Judging by your pages, tion [FT356:73], his strange tree
a moth New Guinea this is a process already under- dolls appear to be a mrtenitsa
tribesmen in bizarre way, but theres a lot of work to (plural mrtenitsi). About 35
masks, Elizabeth Frink be done. years ago I worked in Bulgaria
PETER KING

sculpture, Archimboldo, Arthur Burton as an English teacher in a state


Tenniel, even a corpse- By email school. On 1 March a colleague

72 FT3589
www.forteantimes.com
gave me a pair of small red and Chalk outlines I was rather flabbergasted by have disseminated nationwide.
white woollen balls joined with the year, because I had heard a Technically, I heard the story as
a long red thread that she tied In response to the Mythchas- very similar story around 1969; involving a friend-of-a-friend
around my wrist, explaining that ers question regarding whether definitely between 1968 and and so it is by definition a FOAF
it was a traditional gift to cel- police ever used chalk outlines 1971. I readily recall my friend tale but I genuinely believed
ebrate the coming of spring. Over [FT357:21], I can confirm that at Trevor telling a story as a true that I was only one step removed
the next few days I barely saw least here in New York City the story when a group of us were from the source. Whether or not
anyone who was not wearing red police did use chalk at least up all sitting around the table in our this was the case, what is clear
and white tassels, balls, or little to the 1990s. I witnessed these local pub in my home town of is that it is essentially the same
dolls identical to the ones in the outlines on two occasions. Once Wolverhampton.This means that story as that quoted by Jan, and
photo.The dolls are called Pizho in the 1980s while riding on a I was either in the Sixth Form or that it is much older than he had
and Penda. By the end of the bicycle, I turned a corner and in my early years at University. determined.
week they started to appear hang- rode straight over an outline of a The version he told was along the It is easy to see how Trevors
ing on trees, and my colleague person and through their blood following lines: A woman heard story would have evolved bit by
told me that they were left there puddled next to the head outline. a continual knocking on her bed- bit over time and over the pond,
as nesting material for the storks An angry officer ran up to me but room wall from the neighbouring with (for example) Spiderman be-
that had just begun to arrive. I quickly realised that nobody had house. She went next door to see ing superseded by Superman. But
dont know if they were ever used bothered to barricade the scene if anyone was in, and called for what I found myself thinking was
as such, but the storks never got of a pedestrian/car accident to the neighbours, but the house that somehow I could have been
mine as I selfishly kept them as prevent something like this from was locked and she could not get virtually at the source of this
a souvenir. I seem to remember a happening.The still alive victim in.The knocking continued and urban legend, and that it could
greeting on 1 March that related was taken away from the busy so she called a policeman, who well have been the re-telling of
to Baba Marta, but I cant recall street by ambulance and the out- also heard the knocking, and the the initial story by Trevor, me
the exact phrase. line was for the forensic team who two of them went to check the and our friends, that had given it
Andy Salter had yet to arrive. One can assume neighbours house again.The momentum. Stranger things have
Bangor, Gwynedd that the advent of phone cameras policeman forced entry into the happened.
has negated the need to make house and the two of them went I contacted Jan with the above
Mrtenitsi are worn until the these outlines. up to the adjoining bedroom, and he very much welcomed the
first sign of spring, such as a fruit William Hohauser where they found the wife naked, additional information. He is
tree in blossom, whereupon they By email spread-eagled and tied to the now retired and spends a lot of
are taken off the wrist/neck or bedposts. She was also gagged. his time fishing and skiing in his
unpinned from clothing and tied Despite being tied, she could home state of Utah. Neverthe-
to the tree. Other signs of spring
Giant hopper knock the wall with her knuckles less he has always been helpful
include seeing the first stork or It is my humble submission that which is what had been heard. in responding to questions that
swallow, when the mrtenitsi are Tyrannosaurus rex once hopped in At the foot of the bed was her I have asked in relation to my
removed and put under a stone. the manner of kangaroos. unconscious husband dressed in phantom hitchhiker-related
You can predict the future based Anthony Riddell a Spiderman outfit! When they researches. With David Suttons
on which insect is nearest your Richmond, Victoria, Australia untied the woman, she explained support, I informally approached
mrtenitsa under the stone the that she and her husband enjoyed Jan about whether he might
next day! Although we have no undertaking such sexcapades, consider writing an article about
Bulgarian heritage, I really love
Superhero hijinks and her husband had climbed on the relationship between urban
the whole tradition and give my I enjoyed the Hierophants Ap- to the top of the wardrobe/ chest legends and fake news for the
kids mrtenitsi on 1 March every prentices Building A Fortean of drawers, situated opposite the FT issue [FT352] that focused on
year, but we must have Bulgarian Library about urban legends foot of the bed, in order to leap fake news.
neighbours because some years [FT353:52-53], particularly as it off on to her. Unfortunately his Jan politely declined, making
we find other mrtenitsi hanging was Jan Harold Brunvands The foot had slipped and he had fallen the point that urban legends as
from the plum trees down our Vanishing Hitchhiker that ulti- and hit his head on the bedpost, an oral traditional genre, while
road. mately led me to be chasing road knocking himself out, etc etc. very common from the 1960s
Heather Robbins ghosts across west Lancashire Now Trevor assured us that the through to the 1980s, later mostly
Bognor Regis, West Sussex [FT328:32-39]. policeman was a friend of his, migrated into popular culture. He
Around 2013 I picked up a and he had got the story from him contends that this is largely due
Regarding little dolls hanging copy of Brunvands Too Good To directly and recently.The loca- to the Internet, with these types
from tree branches: several years Be True in a charity shop, and set- tion was said to be somewhere in of stories now being circulated
ago, in the town of New Brighton tled down to reading new urban or near the neighbouring town via websites and forums, what
on the Wirral, I saw something legends, in addition to those I was of Walsall. I definitely recall might be called cyberlore. He
similar while on my way to work. already familiar with. Eventually that Trevor told it as something kindly provided me with a copy of
it was quite high up, but I could I came to the Superhero Hijinks factual; he did not tell the story his paper: TheVanishing Urban
make out that it was a small story in Chapter 5 (Sexcapades), as a joke, or as a story even Legend, which was published in
stuffed figure of Peter Griffin which has a woman tied up on the though he was arguably the very Midwestern Folklore (vol.30: no.2,
from Family Guy. It had gone bed with her unconscious hus- best joke teller I have had the Fall 2004, pp.5-20). It is a very
after a few days, possibly blown band naked on the floor wearing a good fortune to come across. worthwhile read for all forteans
away by the wind, and nothing Superman cape. Jan states in the Naturally I, along with my friends with an interest in this topic,
else replaced it. associated notes that the earliest present, re-told this story on many which I wholly recommend.
Darren Rosenberg published text he had found was occasions when at university, and Rob Gandy
Birkenhead, Merseyside 1986. consequently it will no doubt Wirral, Merseyside

FT359 73
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LETTERS

Party poopers? thick that allows one to skate but private area, fallen through a lying in the unexplained 0.01%.
can hide the ice and its condition covered patch of thin ice not eas- Ron Gardner
The reviewer of A Travelers a thin patch for example. I have ily seen and been swept away by Ludlow, Shropshire
Guide to the Afterlife [FT356:63] gone through the ice here when a current that even if weak would
disclosed more about them- skating because I did not see a be deadly. In the dark the open
selves than the book they were thin patch covered by snow that patch where she fell through
Premature babies
reviewing when they wrote, can be found where there is cur- might not be readily seen by the Edward Dutton finds an aston-
Party-poopers like nihilists and rent or by beaver houses where returning friends. During their ishing number of famous people
materialists will find little to en- the beavers leave branches in the initial consternation and subse- who were born prematurely
joy here, especially as they bring water to create a thin spot during quent search, depending on the [FT353:56-57].There are indeed
so little of value to this otherwise the winter. Or under bridges cold, the spot might have frozen plenty of such lists; they are,
rich feast of mankinds belief where it tends to be warmer. over and been covered by blowing however, not reliable.The case of
systems. I also lived in Sweden for a snow. It might have frozen to the Newton, described in the article,
On the contrary, a materialist number of years where I had point that later searchers could is well documented. Many others
outlook is no impediment to be- the rare opportunity to skate to tread on the very spot where the mentioned are far less so, to the
ing entertained by the super- work over frozen sea ice. On one poor girl went through.The ice degree that they appear to be un-
stitions indulged in by others occasion my leg fell through a might have been a foot thick in known outside the lists.These are
regarding what lies beyond. As long pressure crack in the ice most places but probably not possibly compiled not for histori-
for bringing little of value to the that was about a foot wide, again throughout. cal or medicinal reasons, but by
feast, the materialist can arrive hidden by a layer of paper-thin Now, the part I find puzzling. people who find comfort in them.
with some much-needed light and ice and snow. I scrambled up I am sure the good people of A couple of names I investigated
reason and, unlike some of those immediately as any shift in the Crookston would be more than were more interesting, though.
afflicted by religion, they can ice could have pinned me. Low familiar with everything Ive said Johannes Kepler was born
be relied on to bring a bottle of temperature and blowing snow as they lived in and were experi- on 27 December 1571, a small
something alcoholic to help cel- can cover up an open area quite enced in such a winter climate. and sickly baby. In those days it
ebrate the only life that we have. quickly. From the story it seems Why were they so sure she did not was dangerous enough to be a
Not such party-poopers after all. the young people were skating go through the ice and instead newborn at all, never mind born
Martin Stubbs when it was dark as none of her mysteriously disappeared? two months early. But how do we
London party skated outside the circle Ken Jarecki know he was born early? Many
of electric light. I do not know Sudbury, Ontario, Canada years later he calculated the time
how good electric lighting was of his conception with impressive
Icy hazards in 1902, but I can tell you even precision: 4:37am on 17 May.This
I found Theo Paijmans article on during a bright sunny day while
Elusive five per cent happened to be seven months be-
the disappearance of Gertrude out ice fishing Ive seen wolves The search for some meaningful fore his birth; and two days after
Strassburger [FT354:28-29] quite out on the lake about a quarter phenomena in the five per cent of his parents marriage.
interesting, but puzzling. I grew mile away that took a while for unexplained UFO observations/ Winston Churchill was
up in Timmins, Ontario, where my friends and I to tell what they encounters seems on the face of announced thus in the Times:
winters are extremely cold. I were. On a dark night, even with it an admirable idea [FT352:27], On the 30th Nov., at Blenheim
still live in Northern Ontario but lighting, a person can get lost in but I think a note of caution is Palace, the Lady Randolph
about 350km (220 miles) south of the shadows (for instance under a called for. Lets propose a hypoth- Churchill, prematurely, of a son.
Timmins. Winters are a little less bridge) at a distance. As for there esis: UFO observations are all Again, according to Duttons
extreme and, as I love winter, I being only two sets of footprints, down to a group of known causes, article, this was supposedly
spend a lot of time outdoors ice I know that if I am wearing short basically misperceptions of natu- two months premature. If little
fishing, skiing and skating on boots or shoes in the winter I will ral objects and phenomena, hoax- Winston was anything but a per-
lakes and rivers, snowmobiling, walk in tracks that are already es and frauds. On looking at the fectly healthy baby its not men-
etc. Ive never seen a foot of ice made to avoid stepping in fresh available data we find that our tioned in any source. Also, by a
on a shallow lake let alone a mov- deep snow and getting snow in hypothesis has a 95% explanato- strange coincidence, his parents
ing river by 2 December where I said boots or shoes.There must ry power.That might not impress had married about seven months
now live in Sudbury, Ontario ice have been some point where a physicist looking for a 99.99% before his birth.
is usually 2-3ft (60-90cm) thick there were many tracks from the or even higher explanatory power Perhaps some other supposed
by mid-March, but open areas skaters walking before changing for their hypothesis, but we are preemies were subject to simi-
can still exist. Now, northern into their skates, most likely near not dealing with a hard science lar coincidences.
Minnesota may have earlier and the spot Gertrude sat by the fire. I here. Rather we have a massive Peter Olausson
harsher winters so that much can say that after a day of ice fish- experiment in human biology/ Gothenburg, Sweden
ice may not be impossible by 2 ing with one or two friends the psychology, so a 95% explanatory
December. River ice can vary in snow looks as if its had a soccer rate for the hypothesis is pretty Dutton suggests (following an
thickness because of current and match played on it. good.The remaining five per cent interpretation of Shakespeare)
pressure cracks. When reading So, what is my point? That a could be regarded as noise.To that Richard III was born prema-
the story one gets the impres- young girl sitting under a bridge look at it slightly differently at turely. In fact, the commonest
sion that the ice that was being on or near the ice by a fire on what level of explanation do we accusation was that Richard had
skated on was clear of snow but a dark evening waiting for her give up and accept that thats all spent 24 months in his mothers
that is rarely the case unless an friends a quarter mile away may there is? I suspect that even if womb, making him the opposite
area has been cleared for a rink. have retraced her tracks back out we could explain 99.99% of UFO of premature (whatever that is).
Often the ice has a layer of snow onto the ice to watch for them observations some would still see Martin Jenkins
sometimes only a few inches or to relieve herself in a more the resolution of the mystery as London

74 FT359
www.forteantimes.com
IT HAPPENED TO ME...
First-hand accounts from FT readers and browsers of www.forteantimes.com

Now you see it the field beyond. Everything was


utterly still and silent, no gulls,
In the winter of 1985 I was no tractors moving, nothing.
employed as a greenkeeper at This lasted about 30 seconds,
a council-run bowling green in then suddenly everything came
New Brighton, Wirral. One day back as normal. From behind
the weather was quite bad and, me I heard my mother ask,
unable to work, I retired to my What are you up to?. I turned
small messroom for an early and saw her coming out of the
teabreak. While there I picked outside toilet behind me. She
up my usual daily newspaper couldnt have got there without
and found an article about the us seeing each other. I said,
great American mariner Joshua Did you see me when you
Slocum and his lone voyage went past? She laughed and
around the world in his boat said, No, were you hiding in
Spray in 1895-1898. I was that tree? and walked inside.
fascinated by the story and I seem to have briefly disap-
decided I would search for his peared, or at least become
book Sailing Alone Around The invisible.
World in local bookshops or A couple of years later I real-
libraries when I had the chance. ised that just a few miles away
The rain by now had stopped at that time the Uninvited
so I stood up to go back to St Brides Bay / Dale Farm UFO
work and accidently dropped scare was happening, I saw
my newspaper on to the floor. nothing, and dont remember
it or thrown it away by accident. looked as if it was just floating
As I bent down to pick it up I anything else, but I sometimes
My brothers confirmed that they there.
noticed something on the floor wonder where I went that day.
had not visited my parents that I created a reconstruction
wedged behind the armchair I Chris Warr
week and hadnt seen it either. of what I saw (shown above),
had just vacated. I saw that it Coombswood, West Midlands
The book had simply vanished. using a photo taken on the
was a book and pulled it out.
I can only think it returned to bridge over the Glaze at the
As I did so I had a very strange
feeling that I already knew what
where it mysteriously came location. The river is about Shropshire fairy
from and hopefully has reap- 20ft (6m) below the bridge,
the book would be. It was the I have seen a creature that
peared for somebody else and the bridge marks the
very book I had just read about. looked just like the one
to read. Interestingly, in the boundary between Salford and
I was amazed as there were no described by Jim D [FT355:76].
book, Joshua Slocum recounts Warrington. Of course, the
other books in the room and On a sunny afternoon in 2011
how he was visited by a photo was taken in daylight, but
I was the only person whod I was on the phone to a friend,
ghostly spectre of a sailor who the event was at night, when
spent any time in there for over looking out the window towards
piloted his boat during a storm the tear appeared to be even
a year. The newspaper was new the bottom of my garden. At the
whilst he lay ill on deck (see more solid black than in the
that day so I discounted the time I lived on a smallholding in
FT354:49). Slocum and his ship picture it was the absence of
idea that someone else had an isolated part of Shropshire
later vanished without trace in any light or shadow that made
read the article at an earlier (a neighbouring county to where
the area known as the Bermuda the dark tear so special.
date, bought the book them- Jim D saw his fairy). Suddenly
selves and had left it there. Triangle in the Atlantic. Jim D
a creature flew from my right
Tony Davenport Warrington, Cheshire
Over the next few days I past me and hovered over yel-
Birkenhead Wirral, Merseyside
read the book and found it to low roses in my garden. It flew
be very interesting. When Id Frozen moment as Jim D described: with the
finished I decided to give it to A tear in reality body hanging down and the
In August 1977 I was a 13-year-
my Dad to read as we shared It was just after 7pm on 9 wings out at the back. It was
old boy on holiday with my
the same love of all things January 2016 when I saw what unlike any creature I had ever
parents at a cottage in Trevine,
maritime. On arriving at the I can only describe as a solid seen before, or since. It was
Pembrokeshire. I was out in the
house I found my parents were black tear in reality. It was around the size of my palm
back garden one morning, while
not in so I left the book on the there for just a fraction of a and I remember thinking its
my mother was in the cottage
kitchen table and went home. second, and was on the bridge face slightly resembled a hippo.
cooking. I then had a rather
A few days later I remembered over the river Glaze in Greater I was so surprised I said to
strange experience: it was as
the book and rang Dad to ask Manchester. All the streetlights my friend, I can see a fairy!
if I were in a film and someone
what hed thought of it. To my were on and casting light all Ever since I have scoured
pressed pause. Everything
surprise he replied that he around. What struck me about insect books trying to identify
stopped. The wind didnt blow,
didnt know what I was talking the strange dark object was it, without success. I like to
the trees didnt move or rustle,
about as hed never seen the that it stood out from the bush think in this case there really
the birds didnt sing or bees
book, and that it was nowhere in the background as solid was a fairy at the bottom of my
buzz total silence. But I could
to be found. He checked with black! It showed no reflection of garden!
still hear myself move. I walked
Mum who said she hadnt seen light from the streetlights, and Rachel McDonald
to a hedge and looked out over
it and had certainly not moved

FT359 75
www.forteantimes.com
Fortean Traveller
112. Northern Souling
Europa League the previous
night. The ensuing sword fight
led to the untimely death of the
Turkish Champion, at which
ROB GANDY heads to a local hostelry for the seasonal weirdness of the point the Champions mother
(The Old Woman), who bore a
Warburton Souling Play, an old Cheshire tradition enjoying a new lease of life... striking resemblance to Mrs
Brown, rushed in to tell off

I
King George. The situation was
first became aware of the Saracens Head at critical, so she called out to
the Warburton Souling lunchtime, perform at see if there was a doctor in the
Plays through Laurence St Werburghs Church house. Luckily, the next person
Armstrongs presentation Autumn Fair in the through the door was a Doctor
at Weird Weekend North afternoon, and then who said that he could cure the
2016 [FT343:20-21]. They are a visit another six pubs slain Champion. This involved
Cheshire tradition, performed before finishing with an ansthetising mallet to
in early November and closely a performance at the the head and a large spanner
related to the Christmastime Saracens Head. applied to certain parts of the
Mumming Plays. They are My wife and anatomy, followed by a liquid
about death and revival, I headed for the of indeterminate nature being
the end of one year and the Saddlers Arms in poured down the Champions
bringing of good luck for the Lymm on 4 November, throat via a funnel and tube.
next. Before the days of science and managed to get Miraculously, the Champion
and meteorology, rural people prime seats. The was resurrected and proclaimed
believed performing such plays Gang proclaimed its the arrival of Beelzebub, who
was crucial to ensuring a good arrival with one of its charged in noisily banging his
harvest the next year. hearty songs outside dripping pan with his club.
Distinctively, Souling plays the entrance. The He announced that he would
include a Horse character, Enterer strode into drink the barrel dry, sir, and
represented by a decorated the pub, announcing promptly downed a customers
horses skull, which should the start of the Play pint in one. He in turn welcomed
not to be confused with the Saints Day, 1 November, unless and inviting King George to the arrival of Dick the Horse
Hobby Horse of other English this falls on a Sunday. The pubs step forward and tell of his and his Driver, who stated that
traditions. Historically, all can be quite far apart, meaning achievements winning gold He once was alive, but now hes
characters are played by men. that certain Gang members and fighting dragons. George dead. He is nothing but a horses
The Warburton plays are cannot imbibe because they quickly realised there was a head who has But one leg;
performed by a group known are driving. Each evening Jack Russell spaniel prepared and for his living hes obliged to
as The Gang, its focal point targets different parts of east to take him on. He was followed beg. This led into the final song
being the local Saracens Head Cheshire: Warburton and its and challenged by the red- encouraging people to put your
pub. immediate environs, Lymm, faced Turkish Champion, who hand in your pocket and pull
The Souling Play is Knutsford, and Urmston/ delighted in highlighting that out your purse. Gang members
performed in up to six pubs in Flixton. There were six pub the Turkish team Fenerbahe then collected donations for the
an evening, at roughly half-hour tours in 2016, with the final had beaten the local team, local Childrens Adventure Farm
intervals, always starting on All one having the Gang meet at Manchester United, 2-1 in the Trust. 1 It was all great fun and
well received.
Souling Plays are but one
form of the traditional plays
which were performed in
their thousands throughout
England until the end of
the 19th century. The words
spoken are, in essence, several
hundred years old. Plays were
likely performed by poorer
community members; they
end with what is, in effect, a
begging song requesting food
and commodities to help them
through the winter. Sometimes
cakes would be sold to raise
money, leading such plays to be

ABOVE: A poster used to advertise the


ROB GANDY

Warburton Souling Play. LEFT: Dick the


Horse and his driver enter the pub.

76 FT359
www.forteantimes.com
ROB GANDY
ABOVE: The Gang assembled (left-right):The Turkish Champion, Beelzebub, King George, Dick the Horse and his Driver, the Doctor, the Enterer and the Old Woman.

called Soul-Caking. Reportedly


this was the case with the Historically, all In 2002, a decision was
made for Gang members to
holders. A couple admit to being
FT readers.

characters are
Warburton Play. Unfortunately, concentrate on one character To get around the Cheshire
the early 20th century saw many each, thereby enabling more countryside, the Gang share cars
such plays lost to changing times consistent performances with and driving responsibilities.
and the impact of two world played by men better interaction between However, the final tour involves
wars. The Warburton Play was the different characters. The up to 12 hours drinking and so
one victim, being last performed previous approach was more a minibus is hired. Beelzebub
in 1936 (or 1938 according to ad hoc, with members playing is the one character who never
some sources). Fortunately, its that one reason to bury the head multiple characters over a drives because he is forced (!) to
details were written down and was to prevent it being stolen, season and roles allocated down a pint in every pub as part
subsequently published. because having another gangs on the night. In recent years of the Play.
Bollin Morris, because of their horses head gave you rights the Gang has become more Its wonderful that the Gang
affinity with local traditions, to perform on their patch. The relaxed about the one person- continues this revived Cheshire
revived the Souling Play in 1978. tradition of the Warburton Play one character approach, tradition and uses it to benefit
2
Over time, the play evolved starting and finishing at the particularly as the best way good causes: this year, 1,450
away from pure Morris activity, Saracens Head links to a note of playing each part is well- was raised for charity. But
until by the beginning of the that the old Horses head was established. Now, each member if they want to replace their
21st century it was a completely buried there following the last can perform two or three parts, current Horses head with that
separate entity. Since 2002, it performance in 1936; perhaps it adding flexibility to cover buried in 1936, perhaps they
has been performed annually at is still there absences, as long as their should look to the search for
St Werburghs Churchs Autumn The current Horses head is physique is consistent with Richard III, who was found
Fair. a real 25-year-old horses skull those parts requirements under a car park bay marked
The Gang stick to a acquired from a vet who had Beelzebub must be able to drink R (see FT299:4-5). Perhaps
traditional script, but ad lib to to put a horse down. It was lots of beer. they should check to see if
provide topicality and humour. buried for two years to clear At present, there are 12 Gang theres a bay marked H in the
However, the inclusion of the off the flesh and then painted members in total, covering the Saracens Head car park
Horse is not fully understood; and mounted; but it is now kept seven parts (plus one under the
theories range from it in good condition by the kit Horse). Each does three-four ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
representing a source of power monitor rather than being nights and covers a maximum My great thanks to Laurence
for many life tasks in times buried. Previously, the Gang had of two parts, one main and one Armstrong for his help and
past to an echo of Cheshire erroneously boiled a skull to back-up. Laurence has been guidance. All information is from
hunting traditions. Interestingly, strip off the flesh, but this made involved since 1978, with the Laurence and/or http://www.
some similar plays reference the bone soft and pieces kept bulk of the older members larchfieldhouse.co.uk/Souling/
the horses head being buried breaking off, meaning it needed participating for over 30 WarburtonSoulingPlay.htm, unless
in the pub grounds, retrieved replacement after 10 years. The years. There are two pairs of otherwise referenced.
prior to the start of each season, current skull has suffered a bit fathers and sons, and two new
cleaned and decorated, and over the years, so the Gang has recruits joined in 2015. The NOTES
then buried again following the had some initial thoughts about youngest are in their early 30s, 1 http://www.caft.co.uk/
final performance. It is believed its possible successor. but there are several bus pass 2 http://bollinmorris.noip.me/

FT359 77
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78 FT359
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COMING
NEXT STRANGE DEATHS UNUSUAL WAYS OF SHUFFLING OFF THIS MORTAL COIL

MONTH An Indonesian man


called Akbar was reported
medical and security teams. Most
people assumed it was simply
missing on 27 March in part of the show. However, Kristy
Salubiro village on the island of Manzanares, 39, had been found in
Sulawesi, after going to harvest palm her blood-spattered cabin with a severe
oil. The next day, police found a sluggish head wound and was pronounced
reticulated python, 7m (23ft) long, dead 20 minutes later. The liner
in a ditch beside the familys was diverted to Juneau and
palm plantation; nearby was placed on lock-down for hours
a harvesting tool and a boot. as the FBI investigated. Murder
The huge snake was cut open charges were eventually filed
and the 25-year-old mans body against the husband, Kenneth
found. Reticulated pythons are Manzanares. The couple, from
among the worlds longest reptiles Santa Clara, Utah, had taken
and suffocate their victims before the cruise to celebrate their 18th
swallowing them whole. They rarely wedding anniversary, accompanied
PARANORMAL RANGERS kill and eat humans, although there are
occasional reports of them swallowing
by their teenage daughters. Mr
Manzanares, a former bail bondsman, told
INVESTIGATING ANOMALIES ON young children or animals. A python of an acquaintance that he killed his wife
A NEW MEXICO RESERVATION this size would hunt for large prey, such because she would not stop laughing at
as boars or wild dogs. While they normally me. New York Daily News, (London) Eve.
avoid human settlements, they would see Standard, 28 July 2017.
palm oil plantations as a good hunting
ground, as they attract animals like boars, A pregnant Minnesota teenager was
primates or dogs. In 2013, a security charged with second-degree manslaughter
guard on the island of Bali was killed by a after shooting her boyfriend dead on 26
python at a luxury beachfront hotel. [AFP] June in a failed stunt they hoped would
theguardian.com, BBC News, 29 Mar; NY make them famous on YouTube. With two
Post, 30+31 Mar 2017. For a photo of man camera positioned to catch their antics,
with his head inside a pythons jaws, see and with their three-year-old son in the
FT85:12; and for a photo of an anaconda room, Monalisa Perez, 19, shot 22-year-old
that had swallowed a man, see FT58:16. Pedro Ruiz III in the chest from a foot away,
while he held a hardcover encyclopdia
MARSUPIAL PUGILISM A gay loner inadvertently filmed his own
murder during a bondage sex session.
as a shield. He died at the scene in
Halstad, Minneapolis, watched by nearly
AN UNSPORTING HISTORY OF Jason Marshall met Peter Fasoli, 58, on a 30 neighbours. Around half an hour before
BOXING KANGAROOS gay dating app and smothered him while the stunt, Perez tweeted: Me and Pedro
Classic FM played in the background. are probably going to shoot one of the most

+
Marshall set fire to the house in a bid to dangerous videos ever, with two nervous-
cover his tracks and it was thought Fasoli looking emojis. She added: HIS idea not
had died in the fire at his bungalow in MINE, accompanied by an image of a
Northolt, northwest London, on 7 January monkey covering its eyes. The weapon was
PSYCHIC TELEPHONES, 2013. An investigation concluded that a Desert Eagle .50 calibre pistol, described
the fire was started by a faulty light, in online ads as one of the worlds most
MIRACULOUS CROSSES, which might have fallen onto his bed. powerful semi-automatic handguns. Perez
MYSTERY LIGHTS, Then in November 2014, Fasolis nephew faced up to 10 years behind bars. Eve.
Christopher Murgatroyd, researching his Standard, 29 June; (Sydney) D.Telegraph,
AND MUCH MORE familys genealogy, examined the hard drive (London) D.Telegraph, 30 June 2017.
on his uncles fire-damaged computer and

FORTEAN
discovered a video recording of the tryst Roco Corts Nez, 25, had just given
with Marshall, 28, who had posed as a birth by csarian section in Sevilles
policeman. Fasoli is seen being tied up and Our Lady of Valme hospital on 20 August

TIMES
begging for his life before being smothered when a porter was moving her to a
with cling film and a plastic bag. At his maternity ward on a hospital trolley. The
Old Bailey trial, Marshall, of Forest Gate, doors on the lift they were in opened
east London, was found guilty of murder. and closed a few times. As the porter

360
D.Telegraph, 1+11 Aug; Metro, 1 Aug 2017. attempted to wheel her out of the lift to
try another one, it began to rise, leaving
Passengers on the Emerald Princess cruise part of her body hanging outside. She was
liner travelling along the Alaskan coastline decapitated. She had two other children,
on 25 July were being entertained by aged four and five, and her newborn
a Murder Mystery play during dinner daughter Triana who was with her at
when there was an announcement at the time was not harmed. BBC News,
9pm requesting urgent assistance from 21 Aug 2017.
ON SALE 9 NOV 2017
Could The Writers Bureau's
Writer of the Year 2017
Sarah Plater

You
Be A
Writer?
Marian Ashcroft talks with Susie Busby, Principal of The Writers Bureau, Britains largest
independent writing school, about what it takes to be a writer.
Who do you think can be a writer then, Susie? grafting. And in our experience, grafting beats pure talent every
Well, a writer is someone who communicates ideas through time.
words. And most of us do that every day via social media so
were all writers to some degree. Okay, but if someone already has that grafting spirit,
where does The Writers Bureau fit in?
But can you really say someone is a writer if they text Well, to stick with sporting analogies, for any student ready to go
and tweet? for it, Writers Bureau is the coach in the background. Our
Not really. I suppose when we talk about a writer we usually courses and tutors build a new writers confidence and help them
mean someone whos earning from their writing. But telling find out what theyre good at. We then show them how to get
stories to friends online is writing too. And even there, you come pieces ready for submission, so theyve got the best possible
across people who craft their sentences and play with words, chance of turning whatever talent they may have into proper,
which is a good indication that writing is their thing. paid work.

So, do you need to be a special person to study with Is that what happened with this years Writer of the Year
The Writers Bureau? Sarah Plater?
Not at all! WB has been going for 28 years now, and though some Exactly. When Sarah first joined us she wanted to write novels
people come to us with very clear objectives, others have little (still does). But on her course she discovered a talent for non-
more than a vague desire to do something creative. Our students fiction. Shes now onto her fourth non-fiction book, earns half
come from all sorts of backgrounds, and all sorts of cultures her income from writing, and runs a writing business with her
leafy home-counties villages, bustling African cities, and husband Mr and Ms Creative. Were so proud of her. Shes
everywhere else between. The majority havent really written worked hard and run with opportunities as theyve arisen, which
much before, so we give them skills, and a safe space to explore just goes to show what a little confidence and determination can
their options, then prepare them for approaches to the editors, actually do.
agents and producers wholl eventually push their work out into
the world. Any final words of advice for aspiring writers?
Apart from taking one of our courses, you mean? No seriously, I
But you must be looking for something believe a writer must do three things. Firstly, read lots, and
Determination. Apart from a reasonable level of written English, widely. Next, write as much as possible ideally every day. And
thats all were after. finally, learn to edit. Anyone who can do these three things is well
on the way to producing great work.
Not talent?
Well, that helps. But talents no good if you wont put the hours If youd like to find out more about The Writers Bureau, take a
in. Its the same in all the creative industries. Like Mo Farah said look at their website: www.writersbureau.com or call their
back in 2012 Anythings possible, its just hard work and freephone number 0800 856 2008. Please quote AT1117

Why Not Be A Writer?


Please send me details on how I can become a writer.
Name. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
(BLOCK CAPITALS PLEASE)
Address . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
As a freelance writer, you can earn very good money in historicals, journalism, writing for children, radio, TV, the ..........................................................
#

your spare time, writing the stories, articles, books, scripts stage etc. You are advised on style, presentation, HOW TO
etc that editors and publishers want. Millions of pounds SELL YOUR WRITING, copyright and much more. In . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .Post
. . . .Code
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are paid annually in fees and royalties. Earning your share short, you learn how to be a successful writer. Email. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
can be fun, profitable and creatively fulfilling. If you want to be a writer, this is the way to start! Its ideal Freepost RSSK-JZAC-JCJG
To help you succeed, we offer you a first-class, home-study for beginners. No previous experience or special education The Writers Bureau
course from professional writers with individually tailored required. You can earn while you learn. Details free. Full Dept AT1117, 8-10 Dutton Writers
Bureau 28 Years of
Success
tuition and expert personal guidance from your tutor. You refund if not successful.Visit our website or call our Freephone Street, Manchester, M3 1LE
Members of BILD
learn about writing articles, stories, novels, romances, number NOW! email: 17W1@writersbureau.com
and ABCC
www.facebook.com/thewritersbureau
www.writersbureau.com Please quote AT1117 0800 856 2008 www.twitter.com/writersbureau
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