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UNIT II: Responsible Parenthood/ Family

Planning

Introduction
Marriage is the most enjoyable human relationship. It is also the most significant event
that may happen to your life, but you should not just jump into marriage blindly. There is
much at sake and there are so many people who are not happily married, this the increasing
incidence of separations and divorces. It takes only two people, you and your partner to make
a successful marriage. Aim to make your future marriage a successful one. Children can
contribute to a successful married life, but is also important to plan the number of children for
a happy and healthy family life.

Lesson 1: Marriage are for Mature


Individuals

Definition of Marriage

Marriage is a lifelong partnership of a man and a woman, two unique individuals who
understand, respect and care for each other. It is a dynamic relationship through which both
partners continue to grow and develop their best qualities as human beings. It is joint venture
into the future, with husband and wife trying their best to contribute to each others personal
happiness and fulfillment.

Marriage is a cherished institution under which children are conceived, nourished and
raised to become useful and productive citizens of the country and the world. It is, therefore,
the rock on which the human family is built. It is essential to the continuity of the human
race.

Essentially, marriage is what the two human beings involved make of it. Marriage can be
heaven or hell, depending on the efforts of both partners who chose to embark on it. In more
ways than one, success in marriage is more a matter of being the right person rather than
finding the right person. Happiness is not found; it is earned. As one authority aptly puts it,
Although marriage is designed to meet more human needs than any other institution, it is
also more capable of producing misery, human needs and personal torture than any other
relationship developed by man.

For most Filipinos, marriage is a sacrament and a lifelong commitment. It is a state,


which everyone is supposed to enter upon reaching adulthood; those who grow old without
getting married are oftentimes pitied or ridiculed, especially if they are women. Marriage also
unites the families of the bride and groom, which is why sons accordance with the values of
their kin. Primary importance is attached to kindness and good disposition because these are
considered in dispensable in maintaining peace and harmony in the home. For the man, a
steady job and a sense of responsibility are also desirable.

Right Age for Marriage


Marrying beyond the age of 20 has a lot of built-in advantages. Couples who are older are
generally more mature. They have accumulated many experiences in life and are therefore
better able to cope with reality. They tend to make sound decisions based on clear perceptions
of problems and goals. They can handle responsibility, which is very important in marriage.

Earning capacity is usually greater when a person is older. Thus the later one marries, the
more stable his financial position would tend to be. Economic independence from parents and
in-laws is made possible and one great source of marital unhappiness being forced to live
with relatives is eliminated. Couples who married on the right age are usually prepared for
responsible parenthood.

Importance of Maturity

Marriage is for mature persons, or at least, for those trying to be mature. A constant
intimate relationship between a man and a woman, further complicated by the arrival of
children, calls for all the positive qualities are difficult to attain; husband and wife must help
each other in the unceasing effort to be better person capable of coping with the real world in
general, and of shouldering the responsibilities of married life in particular.

Lesson 2: Ingredients of a successful


marriage
Ingredients of a Successful Marriage

Making marriage work is both an art and a science. It requires adjustments not only
where your partner is concerned, but also your ways and behaviors, your family, friends, job,
beliefs, values, habits, goals, like and dislikes, and all other things which together define the
meaning and context of your life.
It requires skill in the many aspects, which ensure efficiency, comfort and well being
such as family planning, budgeting, nutrition, child-rearing, house keeping, and many more.
The underlying thread in all these endeavors is communication without which there is no real
marriage.

Some of the ingredients of a successful marriage are:

1. Love
There are marriages where love is not the primary reason of the union; but it is
only through love that two people can live together happily as husband and wife or as a
couple.

2. Understanding
No human being is perfect. Man is a mixture of good and bad, positive and
negative, strengths and weaknesses, ups and downs. A person who wants to have a long-term
relationship with another accepts this fundamental law of human nature. This realistic
acceptance is the durable basis of understanding and leads to the contentment, which is
essential in a marriage that is lasting.

3. Care
Anyone who truly loves and cares for his partner is conscious of human needs. He
considers his loved ones happiness as important as his own. He will do everything in his
power to help his partner meet her various needs, by having or trying to find a decent job, by
being sexually responsive; by expressing appreciation for even the slightest accomplishment,
by encouraging contributions to the larger community, and by maintaining a relationship
which allows the other to grow and fulfill himself. There are many other ways of expressing
car for a loved one; it requires only a little creativity to master them.

4. Loyalty
A relationship, in order to be secure, is founded on mutual trust. It is based on a
commitment, which ideally lasts a lifetime. The best way to maintain a mates loyalty is to
always remain interesting and attractive through the years. This means growing and
developing as a person so that life is continuously enriched and renewed. The fires of love are
kept burning through an unceasing expression of tenderness and affection, care and
understanding.

5. A Shared Philosophy
Partners should have a set of beliefs, which constitute a philosophy of life. This is
what gives meaning, perspective and direction to their everyday activities and even to their
own personal relationships with other people.

6. Cooperation
Enlightened couples see marriage as a cooperative endeavor based on the
principle of equality, mutual agreement, and sharing of tasks.

7. Growth
A healthy and mutually satisfying relationship allows both partners ample
freedom to grow and develop to their full potential as human beings. The direction of growth
and development is positive, that is, good qualities and creative abilities are enhanced while
bad traits and destructive tendencies are overcome. Individual interests are cultivated in order
to make life and therefore marriage, a richer experience.

8. Involvement
The meeting of minds and hearts is very important in a marriage. If partners have
different visions in life and work at purposes that are not complementary, friction and pain
are inevitable. Compatibility of goals and interests is a necessary ingredient in martial
success. Couples who are bound by a cause greater than themselves seem to be the happiest
and the most fulfilled.

9. Sharing and Giving


Partners should know how to share and give, for it is better to give than to receive.

10. Communication
The common thread, which ties together all the above-mentioned ingredients of
successful marriage, is communication between partners as well as among all family
members. Communication in marriage is geared primarily towards achieving mutual
accommodation and adjustment. The matter of difference between two unique personalities
with varying needs can be settled amicably through sensible discussion.

Lesson 3: Consideration prior to


Parenthood
Parenthood is a great responsibility or task. It is not a role which you can be successfully
played on the basis of chance. It is a status which responsible couple arrive at after making
decision to have a family.

There are several points to consider when thinking of parenthood

1. Happiness and stability of marriage couple involve. If the relationship of the couple is not
satisfactory, the arrival of a child will not make it better. The child may only serve as another
source of martial stress and misery.

2. Physical and emotional readiness of both partners for parenthood. Motherhood is a very
demanding state. The would-be mother has to be physically and emotionally healthy so she
will give birth to a healthy child and she has to give up some of her activities to attend to the
needs of her child. Fatherhood is also a difficult role to play because it entails tremendous
responsibility. It signals the start of a new stage in life for a man. No longer is he only a
husband, he is also the head of the family who is expected to serve as the provider.

3. Financial Stability. The birth of a child is accompanied by a list of new expenses. There is
the cost of delivery, food, clothing, shelter, recreation and education to be shouldered all
throughout the childs period of dependence on his parents. If the couples combined income
is not big or stable enough to support an additional child, it is better to postpone pregnancy
than to risk it. The child to be born will only be the ultimate loser.

Group 1
IV-1 Sampaguita
Mr. E. Matienzo

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