Neo Humanistic Existentialist approach

Introduction

After a whole semester of studying and understanding guidance and counseling, its
process, techniques, styles and thoughts, now I think that I am somewhat ready to
present my own understanding on how to do things in this field. But first allow me to
define guidance and counseling. I have come across a definition from the Britannica
Encyclopedia:

Guidance and counseling is a process of helping individuals discover and develop

their educational, vocational, psychological potentialities and thereby to achieve
an optimal level of personal happiness and social usefulness.

From this definition sprung up my own understanding of what this is. Guidance and
counseling would revolve around these two words “Helping process”. Guidance and
counseling was made and was designed with the sole purpose of helping others discover
their potentials, have a clearer picture of their abilities and help to provide for the people
the future they seek. Given that definition, I have developed a concept of how guidance
and counseling should be done. I have chosen to merge the humanistic principles and
the existentialist principles. In the course of reading this paper, I hope that you would
discover why I chose it to be such. By the way, I have also added a touch of religious
morality into it.

View of Human Nature

An Essay about good

by chino reyes

Everything that God created is good. Good is the common thing among all people.
It binds them together. It is that “something” which makes them all capable of
doing things which are beautiful. To be good doesn’t really mean to be “proper”
but likewise, to be good means that all of your intentions and desires are leading
for the betterment of other and thus, you become “proper”.

Good is also that “something” which blooms in the hearts of everyone. Its flowers
are love, kindness, generosity and everything that you could think of, both the
beautiful and the ugly, the negative and the positive.
 But you should be careful from good for it may become out of control, for if it
becomes out of control, it could also destroy rather than to beautify and make.

Inspired from Romans 8:28

The basic principle is to give people a chance, treat them as a human person. Bad
things happen; problems emerge because they feel discriminated and were not given a
chance.

In Ethics, I have learned and have confirmed my belief about human nature. It was
said that humans were born with the positive and inherent goodness inside them. I have
held firm to this belief ever since I was a child because I have felt and have observed this
goodness among men. I have also observed that even if they are so bad, like a hardened
criminal, there would be a chance for goodness to surface from them at least once in
their life since that goodness would always find the means to exhibit itself and even at
times overpower the bad allowing the real humanity to be in control.

Since I believe that humans are naturally good, I also believe that they could be
trusted and worthy to receive that trust since my basic principle for this is that everyone
deserves a chance no matter how untrustworthy they look. If ever your trust is failed,
give them another chance and in the end, you would see that at some point, they would
undergo a conversion especially if they have felt that they have been loved and wholly
trusted. Something in them would dictate them to act kindly towards you; I think that is
the goodness that has been awakened due to the goodness that they have constantly
received.

In line with this goodness, I also believe that a human being was given this
freedom. (Freedom is good in a sense especially if it was used for a good cause) This
freedom was given to them in order for them to choose what they want to be and to
make of their lives. If they really want that thing, all they need to do is to is to believe in
those dreams of theirs and to trust in the divine hand of God. This is somehow the
reason why some people fall into bad holes. Since they have freedom, they could choose
anything for themselves.

Now how could this be connected to the view of positive goodness, well its like
this, since humans are free, they have a choice to be good or to be bad and that is why
the emergence of the inherent goodness would be up to that person. At times, because
of this freedom, especially if they have been immersed with the goodness and love of
others and they have felt that they have been trusted and believed in, they would allow
their goodness to express itself.

To sum it all up, the basic thing is that a human being is capable of loving and through
this everything follows.

Therapeutic Goal

Main Goal

To make the person feel that he is loved, understood, believed in, and trusted

Sub goal

To make the person exhibit his inherent goodness

Indicators:

Use his freedom in line with his inherent goodness

Be guided with his set of values
A person exhibits his inherent goodness

“True freedom comes from love and goodness is the expression of love”

The main goal of this approach is actually to make the person feel that he is loved,
believed in and trusted. Let’s face it; in this world all of us can make a mistake, even if
the gravity of those mistakes is not at all the same. That is why it is an important thing
to be understanding and forgiving. I believe that at times, the sources of the problems
and pains are the lack of external love coming from others. I also think that one of the
main reasons why people who have problems become worse is due to the society that
boxes the person and places in his mind his identity according to what they see him,
which everyone of us is vulnerable to; I mean the boxing of the people. I also think that
most problematic people become more problematic because instead of being lifted up
from their already degraded state, the society condemns them and utterly steps at
them. In the process, they end up lower them even more and due to this, they are lead
into being that person that the society calls them. This would make them do evil acts in
order for them to prove that they are not that low since they could do some things to
destroy or retaliate at those people who have been stepping at them.
 In order to change this, people needs to feel the love of others more to
compensate for the pains that they have been inflicted upon. I believe that this feeling of
being loved could manifest magnitudes of effects not just to the person having a
difficulty but also to those people who would encounter that person. One notion which I
could prove this effect of love is during those times when people are about to die. Do
you know why suddenly they easily become good and exhibit their inherent goodness in
them? It’s because in those last ends of their lives, they were filled with the love of God
for them and the love of the people who still believed in them allowing them to believe
that they indeed have committed wrong things and that now they have to choose even
at the end of everything who they want to be. This sudden conversion would also prove
the existent of the inherent good in a person.

Because people are naturally free and also have this inherent goodness in them,
the task is to make this goodness and freedom be in harmony. And In order for that to
happen, they need a set of values to guide them which they need to discover and learn
because different values apply to different people.

Functions and roles of the therapist and the clients

The therapist should be primarily concerned about the welfare of the client. It
should be clear to him that his job is to make the client feel the love that is lacking from
him and help him find it in himself first then in others. The therapist should be as friendly
as possible and should be a friend to the client. Aside from being friendly, he should
guide the client and help him discover the goodness inside him and the freedom to use
that goodness in order to make positive choices to benefit him. He should make the
client feel that he is always free to be what he wants to be and act as he should be in
order for him to reach his goals.

The client in the other hand should try as much as he could to be as open as he
could be in sharing his experiences which would help him be free. He should feel very
comfortable with his counselor. He should also be open to every possibility that he
together with his counselor would find in the talks and allow the feeling of love to
encompass him. He should feel free and not restraint by any bonds.

Relationship between the client and therapist

 I believe that in this approach, the client and the therapist should feel that they are
equal, more of like friends. They should help one another to grow more and to develop
more as a person.
It should be a two way process. It is not only the client who should benefit from this
but as much as possible, the therapist should also find something in the session which is
for him. I think it best to have this kind of relationship because they should have
developed in this relationship the feeling of love since the main objective is the
emergence of love. I think that it could only be attained through an open and stress free
relationship, found in an atmosphere of understanding.
Relationship should be as equals. It is possible to view it this way: The helper is
also like the client. He also encounters problems and at times seeks advices. This in a
way make them the same, it is just in this case, it’s his friend, I mean the client who has
the problem and he has the moral obligation to help him like in a case of two friends in
which it is a win win situation.

Application:

Like the existentialist, in this approach, techniques are not that much important. Of
course, it is still good to have one but it should just be seen as an aid and not as the
main process itself.
The main thing that should be done in this approach is to make the client feel that
he is loved, believed in, accepted and capable of doing things. That would lead them and
help them decide for themselves. It is also important to make that feeling of love, that
atmosphere of love to be prevalent.

Steps:

1. The first phase of the counseling process should be geared more on

providing an affable atmosphere and impression of the counselor to the
client. In this phase, the counselor should already work into promoting
that atmosphere of love for the client to allow him to be more open and
prepare him for the next phase.
2. The next phase would be geared more on giving the client the freedom to
express what he needs to express. This is important since if it has not
been expressed nothing could be accepted.
 3. In this next phase, the counselee should feel that all that he has shared
has been accepted and he must feel that he is accepted by his counselor
no matter whatever he may have shared.
4. This next phase should be geared to guiding the client to utilize his
freedom and to make his inherent goodness be shown through this
freedom not to forgetting to maintain the atmosphere.
5. This last phase should be the conclusion part. After making the client feel
that he is loved, that he is important and secure and after guiding him to
allow his inherent goodness to show itself, it would now be the task of the
counselor to end the process but still maintaining the friendly atmosphere
for the client. A way to help end this is by saying these phrases: “I think
that you’re ready now, you could blend well with the world especially
since we have learned a lot from each other. You want to try and face
them and show them what you’ve gained?”

One note thought, the process should be two way. You should also feel that you are
benefiting from this and make the client feel the benefits that you get from them. This
would add more to their confidence.

Skills needed:

These are the skill which I think would be necessary for the counselor to have

- a heart that cares – it is important so as you could make the atmosphere of

love more genuine
- A listening ear – it is important in order for you to asses the situations
enveloping your client and make them feel that they are loved by you. Listening
is an expression of love.
- Honesty and openness – you should be honest with your client in order for
him to be honest with you.
- Understanding – it is important for you to be understanding since it is the one
thing that they are seeking for.

Termination process

As what I have said before, whenever you feel that he has understood his freedom and
inherent goodness, that would be the time to allow him to apply it to his life. (See steps
above)
Summary

I hope that you have found this to be very useful and applicable in your life. I also hope
that it could help you understand humans more or even present to you a different side of
humans. As what I have mentioned before, this approach is centered in love. Just “love”
and everything would follow.

Bibliography

www.britannica.com/eb/article-9026562/guidance-counseling accessed on October

6, 2007