Sex education: The time is now

By Mohani Niza

A young woman dumps her newborn baby in the drain. A boy on the brink of adolescence
touches himself and feels guilty each time he does so. The usually upbeat fourteen-year-old
model student seems morose and distressed lately - by the time her teacher pulls her aside, it is
revealed that she has been raped by her new stepdad … six times.

I am talking about nobody in particular, yet I am talking about everybody. The young people
mentioned above could be anyone: your next-door neighbour, the girl who gets straight A’s in
your class, your sibling. Their common denominator? They are sexual beings who may be
making choices about their bodies without fully comprehending them. And in the case of the
raped young woman, she had no choice to begin with.

If these examples are dramatic, it is because they are simply symptomatic of a big problem we
have in Malaysia: the failure to teach about sex in our schools.

The call for sex education in Malaysia is not new, but the government has been dilly-dallying in
deciding whether to implement it. Opponents of sex education cite a plethora of excuses, such
as that sex education is against Asian values, or that the nation is simply not ready, but is
insulating our children from the real world truly the solution? Sooner or later the real world
comes knocking– pants unzipped, hands at places where it’s not supposed to be, a tiny being
conceived at the back of a car seat – and the consequences are damning.

In the state of Johor alone, for example, since 2005 there has been more than 16, 000 babies
born out of wedlock and one-fifth of these births are by mothers under the 21 years old. The first
question that may pop on everyone’s mind is whether these young mothers are ready to raise
their babies. But the problem does not end there. Thrown into the burden of young motherhood,
these young mothers may be denied the opportunity to continue their education which subjects
them to a life of poverty. And without the support by the community around her, they are at risk
of facing mental health issues due to the alienation they face by society.

Now, let me just say that I am not an expert on sexual health. I am not even a parent. But like
most Malaysians, I grew up in an environment whereby the adults around me were reluctant to
utter the word “sex”, much less discuss about it. And regardless of which country we come from,

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we could at least acknowledge that growing up is a special and particularly stressful time in
everyone’s lives.

Life pretty much gains a new tapestry when young people hit puberty. Suddenly they are
confronted with changes in their body – breasts, Adam’s apple, deeper voice, growth spurt are
just some examples - and the emotional changes that accompany this physical transformation
are no less exceptional. We may recall, for example, the self-consciousness of being the boy in
the class whose voice is suddenly deeper than the rest, or the sudden mood swings and
heightened sensitivity to the environment around us which threw us into the occasional crying
jag. And perhaps most startling to us is the burgeoning sexual desire that arose within us .
Whether that desire simmered under the radar, or hit us full-force, we suddenly found ourselves
fantasising of sex.

But while puberty marks the beginning of young people being biologically ready for procreation,
it does not mean that they are automatically equipped with the necessary information needed to
make choices about their bodies. Nor does this mean that they fully comprehend the changes,
both physical and emotional, that are taking place in themselves. As a result, young people tend
to rely on information pieced together from Hollywood movies, pornography, magazines and
word-of-mouth, all of which exposes them to inaccurate information about sex. For example, the
glitzy portrayal of sex in Hollywood movies is often removed from the harsh reality of sexually
transmitted diseases and unwanted pregnancies that often result from unprotected sex.

Sex education would thus be beneficial in terms of explaining to young people about the
changes taking place in their bodies and what it all means. It would address pressing issues
such as Sexually Transmitted Infections (STI), HIV/AIDs and the importance of contraceptives.
A sex education syllabus, if drawn up well, would not just teach students the birds and the bees,
but also how to develop a positive body image, make the right choices about sex, assert their
boundaries and deal with sexual abuse and how to cope with the turbulent emotions that
accompany growing up. All of these are valuable tools that are useful for young people for the
rest of their lives so that they are able to make healthy and informed choices.

The common – and no doubt the loudest – argument in Malaysia against the implementation of
sex education is that our society is a conservative and religious one. Skeptics argue that
teaching sex education would encourage young people to have sex outside of marriage, but is
this truly so? Sex is sex. It is a universal human need, such as eating and drinking. Humans
have long engaged in sex outside of marriage, regardless of the sanctions and taboos most
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societies have against it. Sexual activity cuts across ideological, religious, age, class and
geographical divides.

The Malaysian education system have shunned the importance of sex education for too long. It
is therefore time to set aside the religious brouhaha and tackle the issue of sex head on. Let us
talk with our young people about facts, myths and limits related to sex and sexuality. Let us
teach them to reclaim their bodies and be empowered, rather than be fearful of the topic of sex.
If the time is not now, when should it be?

(984 words)