Working Therapeutically

with Adult Stepchildren:

Identifying the Needs
of a Neglected Client Group
Sarah Corrie

ABSTRACT. The growing literature on the effects of parental separation

and remarriage has focused almost entirely on children under the age of 18.
However, clinical observations suggest a marked rise in the number of
adults presenting to professional services, requesting help with adjusting to
parental remarriage that is occurring later in the family’s developmental
lifecycle. This trend suggests that adult children are also significantly af-
fected by family reorganisation and require interventions tailored specifi-
cally to their needs. The aim of this paper is to identify some of the
dilemmas experienced by adult children who are becoming part of a
stepfamily. Through grounding these dilemmas in well-established psy-
chological theories of human development (in particular, attachment the-
ory, schema theory and lifespan development), the paper identifies
frameworks that can assist therapists with a more systematic approach to
assessment and intervention. [Article copies available for a fee from The
Haworth Document Delivery Service: 1-800-HAWORTH. E-mail address:
<getinfo@haworthpressinc.com> Website: <http://www.HaworthPress.com> © 2002
by The Haworth Press, Inc. All rights reserved.]

Sarah Corrie, D.Clin.Psychol., has a BSc. Hons. in Psychology and Counselling Psy-
chology, Practitioner Doctorate in Clinical Psychology, and is a Member of the British
Psychological Society: Divisions of Clinical and Counselling Psychology.
Address correspondence to: Sarah Corrie, South West London & St George’s Mental
Health NHS Trust, Department of Adult Psychology & Counselling, 204 Acre Road,
Kingston-upon-Thames, Surrey KT2 6EX, UK.
Journal of Divorce & Remarriage, Vol. 37(1/2) 2002
http://www.haworthpressinc.com/store/product.asp?sku=J087
Ó 2002 by The Haworth Press, Inc. All rights reserved. 135
136 JOURNAL OF DIVORCE & REMARRIAGE

KEYWORDS. Adult child, mature stepfamily, attachment, schema, life-

span development

It is now common for children in Western societies to experience the

divorce and remarriage of their biological parents. Demographic statistics
illustrate that up to 50% of children in the United States, Great Britain and
Canada will grow up in divorced households during their school years
(Clingempeel, Brand & Ievoli, 1984; Hernandez, 1994). Given that 75%
of all previously married women and 83% of divorced men subsequently
remarry (Crosbie-Burnett, 1991), stepfamilies are rapidly becoming a pri-
mary setting for child development.
There is a now substantial body of research that addresses the effects of
parental separation and remarriage on children under the age of 18 (see
Baydar, 1988; Ganong & Coleman, 1987; Pagani, Trembley, Vitaro, Kerr
& McDuff, 1998). However, the characteristics and needs of adult chil-
dren who are experiencing family reconfiguration have been largely ig-
nored by both the research and clinical literature.
The lack of information on mature stepfamilies is an important omis-
sion to address because adult children appear to represent an emerging cli-
ent group. A visual analysis of the author’s own caseload over the last four
years, for example, highlights a significant increase in the number of adult
clients requesting help with adjusting to parental remarriage. Thus despite
the lack of existing information, it would seem that therapists need to de-
velop their awareness of how family reconfiguration can affect older chil-
dren, as well as younger ones.
The aim of this paper is to propose ways in which therapists can de-
velop systematic approaches to working therapeutically with adult chil-
dren experiencing parental remarriage. Given the lack of research
evidence relating to this client group, the ideas presented in this paper are
inevitably exploratory. However, they are substantiated as far as possible
by drawing on the existing stepfamily literature and identifying specific
psychological models that can be used to conceptualise and work with the
difficulties faced by adult children in systematic ways. A case example is
also provided.
For the purposes of this paper, the term stepfamily will refer to any two
adults who marry or cohabit, where at least one of them has children from
a previous relationship (National Stepfamily Association, 1994). In the
absence of any guiding nomenclature, the terms client and adult
child/stepchild will be used interchangeably to refer to any person over the
age of 18, where at least one of their biological parents has married, or is
 Sarah Corrie 137

intending to marry or cohabit with a new partner. Where reference is made

to families reconfiguring later in the developmental cycle, the term ma-
ture stepfamily is used.

DILEMMAS ASSOCIATED WITH PARENTAL REMARRIAGE: A

REVIEW OF THE LITERATURE

For the adult child, becoming part of a stepfamily poses complex di-
lemmas and requires multiple adjustments. In a review of the author’s
own caseload, these dilemmas and adjustments have typically encom-
passed some or all of the following concerns illustrated in Table 1.
How can these emotional reactions be understood? A review of the ex-
isting literature on stepfamilies highlights three broad categories of expla-
nation that are relevant to understanding the dilemmas faced by adult
stepchildren. These are: (1) emotional and psychological processes (2)
systemic changes and (3) societal views on the sanctity of marriage.
At an emotional and psychological level, parental remarriage repre-
sents a significant life stressor. Visher (1985) suggests that in order to
adapt successfully, children must learn to accept the permanence of paren-
tal separation as well as mourn the loss of fantasies about an idealised
family life. However, the process of mourning can be complicated by
mixed feelings about the arrival of a stepparent. Feelings of anger, jeal-
ousy and competition are common reactions to the arrival of a new paren-
tal partner (Salisbury, 1999). Moreover, accepting a stepparent can also
cause emotional conflict, representing a perceived betrayal of the departed
parent and triggering egocentric feelings of responsibility or guilt (Skeen,
Covi & Robinson, 1985).
Wood and Poole (1983) suggest that in the short-term, a child’s strug-
gle with ambivalent feelings towards a stepparent can trigger confusion, a
sense of worthlessness and loss of self-esteem. This is likely to be equally
applicable to adult children. In the author’s experience, the breakdown of
the family of origin can foster the development of a close bond between a
parent and adult child. This can be seen as reflecting a state of mutual
adulthood that provides opportunities for giving and receiving support in
more reciprocal ways than were possible in the past. The arrival of a step-
parent can, therefore, be perceived as disrupting this bond, precipitating
feelings of anger, jealousy or competition. If unresolved in the lon-
ger-term, these feelings are likely to represent a threat to self-esteem and
sense of security.
138 JOURNAL OF DIVORCE & REMARRIAGE

TABLE 1. Dilemmas and Adjustment Difficulties Faced by Adult Children Experi-

encing Family Reconfiguration

• Feeling emotionally distressed by a parent's decision to remarry.

• Feeling rejected.
• Feeling betrayed.
• Experiencing feelings of anger towards a parent or stepparent.
• Loss of self-esteem.
• Struggling to accept a stepparent who is the same age as the client.
• Disliking overt signs of a parent's sexuality (such as witnessing the new couple hold
hands, embrace or flirt).
• Problems coping with parental pressure to develop a close relationship with a step-
parent.

Loss of self-esteem and emotional insecurity may also reflect systemic

changes. Prosen and Farmer (1982) have argued that in contrast to the nu-
clear family, the stepfamily is structurally ambiguous which prevents the
roles of different family members from being clearly defined. This is par-
ticularly true of mature stepfamilies. For example, whilst parents or step-
parents may believe that adult children should not require support through
the process of family reconfiguration, adult children themselves may ex-
perience this attitude as reflecting a lack of interest or concern. They may
consequently come to regard their emotional needs as a sign of inade-
quacy or failure which can exacerbate existing feelings of insecurity or
low self-esteem. Alternatively, parental attempts to compensate for any
systemic disruptions through offering high levels of nurturance may be
experienced by adult children as intrusive or inappropriate.
Solomon (1973) has suggested that difficulties with role definition can
be understood in developmental terms. The nuclear family begins with a
period of adult union, which is followed by the birth of children, the indi-
viduation of family members and the eventual departure of children from
the family home. For the stepfamily, however, this developmental trajec-
tory is inverted. Provided with an instant family, the parents are prevented
from establishing a prior and exclusive relationship and have to construct
a new vision of family life from a diverse range of experiences, perspec-
tives and histories.
Further differences between nuclear families and stepfamily systems
are evident in relation to boundary changes. In the nuclear family, the ar-
rival of children requires that the parents adjust their identity from being a
couple to becoming a family unit. In order to achieve this, the boundaries
between the family and the outside world must remain relatively imper-
meable in the early stages of family formation. However, as the children
reach maturity and become adults in their own right, the boundaries within
 Sarah Corrie 139

the family must become more permeable to allow new members into the
system.
Similarly, Pasley (1987) proposes that in the early stages of reconfigura-
tion, stepfamilies must be highly cohesive in order to develop a shared fam-
ily identity. However, within mature stepfamilies the stage of their lifecycle
dictates that the boundaries of the system will be at their most permeable.
Thus the developmental needs of the individual and those of the stepfamily
system conflict. How can the system be cohesive for the purposes of family
reconfiguration whilst needing to remain permeable for the developmental
needs of the individuals within it?
The difficulties imposed by structural ambiguity reflect both a lack of
prescribed norms for stepfamily relationships and societal beliefs about
the sanctity of marriage. Furstenberg (1987) has highlighted how views
on the nature and function of marriage have evolved. Whilst previous gen-
erations favoured life-long monogamy, reflecting the primary value
placed on financial security, social standing and the longevity of relation-
ships, younger generations have tended to favour serial monogamy, re-
flecting a greater concern with autonomy and emotional fulfilment.
Mature stepfamilies comprise at least two separate adult generations,
with distinct views about their own generation and specific prejudices
about the other. Adult children may believe, for example, that whilst it is
acceptable for their generation to initiate sexual relationships in the pur-
suit of happiness, it is not acceptable for their parents to do so. If a parent
challenges this myth by leaving one relationship and beginning another,
his or her actions may represent a psychological threat to the adult child’s
established beliefs about acceptable social and sexual behaviour for each
generation, triggering doubts about self, others or the stability of relation-
ships more generally.
Attending to the psychological, systemic and societal factors impli-
cated in family reconfiguration can help both therapists and clients under-
stand the impact of short-term disruptions on emotional well being
(Visher & Visher, 1991). However, these frameworks are not sufficient to
explain the needs of adult stepchildren in their entirety. In the next section,
it is proposed that adverse reactions to parental remarriage often reflect
the reactivation of difficulties which occurred earlier in the client’s devel-
opmental cycle and which should, consequently, be understood from a de-
velopmental perspective.
140 JOURNAL OF DIVORCE & REMARRIAGE

IDENTIFYING PSYCHOLOGICAL MODELS

WHICH SUPPORT THERAPEUTIC PRACTICE
WITH ADULT STEPCHILDREN

Theories of human development attest to the critical role that early ex-
periences have in mediating subsequent emotional experience. For exam-
ple, attachment theory (Bowlby, 1979), models of cognitive development
(Piaget, 1973; Young, 1994) and lifespan development (Erikson, 1980) all
illustrate how the quality of early experiences can represent either a buffer
against, or a predisposing factor towards, future emotional vulnerability.
Consequently, a client’s experience of family reconfiguration is likely to
be influenced by aspects of his or her developmental history.
The role of attachment is central to any review of parenting and thus has
important implications for working with adult stepchildren. Attachment
refers to the enduring, emotionally significant bond that an infant forms
with his or her primary caregiver, and whose nurturing is actively sought
(Bowlby, 1979). Because of the primacy of the bond between parent and
child, early attachments represent templates for relationships in later life
and have been associated with responses to the breakdown of relation-
ships and bereavements (Feeney & Noller, 1996) as well as self-esteem in
adulthood (McCarthy, 1999).
If an adult child’s attachment style is predominantly secure, it can be hy-
pothesised that he or she will cope effectively with the breakdown of the nu-
clear family, will achieve a balance between dependence and autonomy in
the emerging family system and will develop new relationships without ex-
periencing a threat to identity or self-esteem. Any negative feelings associ-
ated with short-term systemic disruptions will be managed constructively
through sharing feelings and seeking interpersonal support. However, if an
adult child has developed an anxious or insecure attachment style, then ad-
justment difficulties are likely to follow.
The anxious-ambivalent adult child may desire intimacy with new
members of the family but is also likely to fear rejection. This can mani-
fest itself in attempts to seek out a high degree of parental reassurance or
attempts to become too rapidly emotionally involved with the new step-
parent. If this need for nurturance is perceived as not being met, then the
client may interpret other’s reactions as a rejection or betrayal, triggering
feelings of inadequacy or doubts about self-worth.
The insecure-avoidant adult child is also likely to experience particular
difficulty with adapting to parental remarriage, adopting a highly self-reli-
ant style and maintaining a distance from other family members due to a
discomfort with intimacy and dependency. This attachment style can hin-
 Sarah Corrie 141

der the development of the cohesiveness that Pasley (1987) identifies as

necessary for successful stepfamily formation, as a result of the adult child
withdrawing from the family system. Insecure-avoidant attachment styles
may thus evoke particular resentment over pressure to accept a new steppar-
ent and similarly, cause the client to view his or her stepparent negatively.
The nature of a child’s early attachments has a critical role in the devel-
opment of beliefs about self and others. From a cognitive perspective,
these fundamental beliefs are defined as schema (Young, 1994). As a pri-
mary vehicle through which people organise their experience of the
world, schema form the basis of the personal meanings implicit in every-
day life and enable individuals to interpret and appraise events in a consis-
tent way (McGinn & Young, 1996).
A client’s schema will vary according to the nature of his or her early
interactions with parent, siblings and peers. For example, if a child is sub-
jected to continuous dysfunctional experiences, he or she is likely to de-
velop maladaptive schema that lead to distorted patterns of thinking and
behaving in relation to self and others. Moreover, because of their early
developmental origins, schema become familiar and are, therefore, rarely
subjected to conscious scrutiny. If, however, an external event occurs that
is incongruent with the existing belief system, then the individual be-
comes forced to reassess fundamental assumptions about self, others and
the world.
The process of reassessing beliefs about self and others can be under-
stood in Piagetian terms. Piaget (1973) highlighted how cognitive develop-
ment occurs through the processes of assimilation, accommodation and
equilibration. If a client is unable to integrate a novel experience into his or
her existing belief system (that is, they cannot assimilate the experience),
discomfort occurs. In order to restore balance (equilibration), the individ-
ual must learn to adapt his or her existing schema (accommodation) in
ways that create a better fit with the environment.
A parent’s decision to remarry can be understood as a disequilibrating
event that requires adaptation of the existing schema about self, others and
the stability of relationships more generally. However, if a client developed
early maladaptive schema associated with themes of rejection,s abandon-
ment or emotional deprivation, then family reconfiguration is likely to re-
activate these beliefs in a way that can significantly affect the client’s
functioning and quality of life. According to schema-focused therapy, it is
the reactivation of these beliefs that mediates feelings of distress, fear and
loss of self-esteem (Young, 1994).
Schematic beliefs evolve within specific psychosocial contexts that are
predominant throughout the client’s lifetime. Erikson (1980) proposed
142 JOURNAL OF DIVORCE & REMARRIAGE

that the on-going interaction between the individual and the environment
results in eight psychosocial stages that span the individual’s lifetime. At
each stage, the individual faces two contrary dispositions that must be bal-
anced in order to achieve successful adaptation. For example, the earliest
stage involves balancing basic trust and mistrust. This enables the infant
to achieve the central disposition of hope which is necessary for develop-
ing a widening circle of relationships. Similarly, the second stage high-
lights the healthy opposition of autonomy against shame and doubt which
in later life leads to the balancing of free will and self-constraint.
Erikson’s stages of adult development highlight how adaptation to fam-
ily reconfiguration may be hampered by particular psychosocial tensions.
For example, an adult aged early to mid-twenties faces the crisis of inti-
macy versus isolation, where the dominant tension involves balancing a
commitment to lasting intimate relationships with the need for separate-
ness. The adaptive outcome produces the first adult strength of love and
commitment. However, the maladaptive outcome leads to love that is in-
discriminate or self-isolating.
The tension between themes of separateness and co-operation suggests
that stepchildren aged early to mid-twenties may experience particular
difficulties over parental remarriage. If the parent appears to have attained
intimacy more easily in a new relationship than the child has so far
achieved, feelings of insecurity or envy may emerge. The arrival of a step-
parent may likewise trigger feelings of anger or jealousy and any overt
signs of parental sexuality are likely to prove highly psychologically
threatening.
The capacity for love that develops out of resolving the dilemma of inti-
macy versus isolation leads into the next stage of generativity versus
self-absorption (late 20s-50s). In this stage, the vital strengths are care and
nurturing and the radius of significant relationships focuses primarily on
divided labour and a shared household. Maladaption, in contrast, is re-
flected in an over-extension of care to individuals beyond the immediate
family circle or a generalised rejection of the caring role (Erikson, Erikson
& Kivnick, 1986). Consequently, it can be hypothesised that the dilemmas
of an adult child in this developmental phase will manifest themselves in
difficulties achieving a balance between over- and under-involvement in a
parent’s new relationship, reflecting a preoccupation with changes in role
and issues of who nurtures whom. If unresolved, this developmental di-
lemma has the capacity to undermine the formation of a cohesive
stepfamily system. In particular, a tendency towards being overprotective
may leave the stepparent feeling excluded, resulting in potentially high
levels of interpersonal conflict.
 Sarah Corrie 143

Case Example

The ways in which models of psychological development can be

adapted to the needs of adult stepchildren is illustrated by the case of
Louise1. Louise, aged 25, was referred to the author for treatment of her
symptoms of depression which had begun following the reconfiguration
of her family of origin.
After a long marriage, Louise’s father had left her mother to marry a
woman of Louise’s own age. Louise felt she had never fully come to terms
with her father’s remarriage which, at the time of therapy, had occurred
four year’s previously. Since then, she had become increasingly de-
pressed. However, her overt symptoms of depression had worsened sig-
nificantly following her stepmother’s disclosure that she and Louise’s
father were experiencing marital difficulties.
Louise had lived independently from her parents since the age of 18.
She was professionally successful and lived with her long-term partner in
a relationship she described as happy. She had no prior history of overt
psychiatric disorder. However, she reported a significant loss of self-es-
teem following her father’s remarriage. It was at this time that she also be-
gan to experience (apparently ill-founded) concerns about the partner’s
fidelity.
Louise was angry with her stepmother for “breaking up her family.”
However, she was even angrier with her father, labelling his decision to
marry a woman of her own age as “disgusting.” She also found the cou-
ple’s overt displays of hand-holding and kissing unsettling, particularly as
she had never witnessed her father behave in such a way towards her
mother. Louise had openly sided with her mother throughout the process
of family reconfiguration and held her father entirely responsible for the
breakdown of the marital relationship.
Given the longevity of her distress, it seemed that Louise’s needs were
not solely a short-term adjustment reaction. Instead, it was hypothesised
that her father’s remarriage had activated underlying maladaptive schema
about self and others, which in turn were related to an anxious-ambivalent
attachment style. In particular, in the context of her low self-esteem and
depression, it was hypothesised that Louise had developed schema associ-
ated with themes of abandonment, rejection, unacceptability and
unlovability (see Young, 1994, for an overview). This hypothesis was
supported by the nature of Louise’s distress. For example, she described
how hurt she had been by her father’s apparent loss of interest in her life
following his remarriage, which she felt was the direct result of his being
144 JOURNAL OF DIVORCE & REMARRIAGE

overly preoccupied with his new wife. For Louise, it felt as though she had
been replaced by her stepmother, in her father’s affections.
Louise described an ardent wish that her father would tell her that he
still loved her and interpreted his lack of response as a sign of rejection.
This in turn, precipitated her symptoms of depression and low self-es-
teem, causing her to doubt the loyalty of her partner. On further explora-
tion, however, it was apparent that her concerns about her lovability were
the product of early maladaptive schema. Louise was able to recognise,
for example, that her fear of rejection had been present throughout her
childhood and that, from an early age, she had frequently sought reassur-
ance from her parents that they loved her. Thus it seemed that the arrival of
her stepmother had reactivated fears about her acceptability and worth,
rather than caused them.
An additional hypothesis was that the breakdown of her parent’s mar-
riage and her father’s remarriage had challenged Louise’s existing schema
about the behaviour of others in relationships. Louise recognised that her
parents had not been happily married for many years. However, the fact
that they had stayed together when she was growing up meant to Louise
that they should have stayed together permanently. Whilst this appeared
to reflect some difficulties with mourning the loss of the ideal family, it
also reflected an underlying belief that adults over a certain age should not
get divorced or display signs of their sexuality (such as hand-holding),
which she labelled as “disgusting.”
The meaning that Louise attached to her stepmother’s disclosure of
marital difficulties was also significant. Her stepmother had tried to initi-
ate contact on numerous occasions. However, Louise had experienced this
as intrusive and felt that any effort on her part to get on well with her step-
mother would be a betrayal of her mother. Nonetheless, when her step-
mother confided in Louise over her marital difficulties, Louise
experienced unexpected feelings of loyalty towards her father which in
turn, left her feeling confused about where her commitments should lie.
In terms of lifespan development, it was hypothesised that developing a
positive relationship with her stepmother would be further hindered by the
fact that both women were at the same stage of development, where the
tension between separateness and co-operation were paramount. Both
women appeared to be grappling with competitive feelings and doubts
about self in relation to the other which Louise’s stepmother attempted to
manage by confiding in Louise as a friend. However, feelings of envy and
insecurity, coupled with a sense of loyalty to her mother and later on, her
father, led Louise to reject her stepmother’s social initiatives as unaccept-
able.
 Sarah Corrie 145

The above formulation was used to develop an action plan for Louise’s
therapy. A principal aim was to help Louise recognise how her father’s re-
marriage had activated underlying schema involving abandonment, rejec-
tion and unacceptability and how her reactions were related to her early
attachment history in terms of what she had learned about herself, others
and relationships through growing up in her family of origin. Views about
the appropriate sexual behaviour of self and others were also addressed, to
help Louise recognise how prejudicial societal beliefs about relationships
may have prevented her from adjusting to her father’s remarriage more ef-
fectively.
Once Louise began to modify her schema successfully, it proved possi-
ble to incorporate a lifespan perspective. This helped her identify and ex-
plore the dilemmas that she and her stepmother shared and to hypothesise
about how each of them were currently addressing feelings of insecurity
and competition. Ultimately, this paved the way for Louise to think more
clearly about the kind of relationship she wanted with her father and step-
mother and how she could disengage from feeling responsible for her
mother.

Developing Therapeutic Practice with Adult Stepchildren:

Some General Recommendations

The case of Louise illustrates how working with adult stepchildren may
require close attention to early maladaptive beliefs associated with indi-
vidual, systemic and societal factors. Whilst it is not possible to generalise
beyond a single case in any definitive sense it does, however, seem possi-
ble to extrapolate some broad recommendations for working with this cli-
ent group.
The first task for the therapist to consider is whether a client’s distress is
primarily a short-term response to systemic disruption or a reactivation of
unresolved psychological difficulties. Visher and Visher (1991) suggest
that many stepfamilies simply lack the necessary skills for dealing with
stress and conflict in the short-term. Thus, if a client has a secure attachment
style and essentially adaptive schema involving self and others, the thera-
pist’s role can be understood primarily as one of normalisation, education
and problem solving. However, whilst many children in stepfamilies even-
tually describe positive experiences of stepfamily life (Stanton, 1986), oth-
ers continue to struggle with adapting to stepfamily life unless professional
help is available (Furstenberg, 1987). It is, perhaps, this group of clients of
which therapists need to be particularly aware.
146 JOURNAL OF DIVORCE & REMARRIAGE

If an adult child continues to experience difficulties adjusting to family

reorganisation over a prolonged period of time, or displays signs of spe-
cific psychiatric disorder in response to parental remarriage, then it is nec-
essary to develop a treatment plan that takes account of the client’s
attachment history, schematic beliefs and stage of lifespan development.
Within this context, there is likely to be a significant role for both cogni-
tive and psychoanalytic approaches.
Initially, the use of structured behavioural and cognitive techniques can
help clients enhance their coping mechanisms and achieve a renewed
sense of mastery over the world. Sources of interpersonal support can also
be accessed through assessing client’s adult attachments and encouraging
them to use these wherever possible. For example, Feeney and Noller
(1996) point out that in contrast to early relationships, the attachments of
adults reflect more varied networks of interpersonal contacts including their
own family, social circle and relationships formed through work which can
all, potentially, provide a buffer against emotional distress.
Once any overt symptomatology has been reduced, it will be necessary
to work more directly on schema modification and change. Based on the
author’s clinical experience, early maladaptive schema relevant to adult
stepchildren typically include abandonment and instability (that is, the
perceived unreliability of others), emotional deprivation (the belief that
their need for emotional support will not be met), dependence/incompe-
tence (assumption of own inability to manage life’s challenges without
nurturance from others) and failure (see Young, 1994; McGinn & Young,
1996, for an overview).
The nature of a client’s early attachment style should also be carefully
considered. If an adult child’s attachment style is insecure as a result of
early experiences with a primary caregiver, then early insecurities may be
reactivated by parental remarriage that have important implications for the
therapeutic relationship. For example, the safety of the therapeutic setting
may be the only security the client has, particularly if early experiences
contributed to a basic mistrust of the world or maladaptive schema involv-
ing themes of abandonment or deprivation. In this context, the therapist
becomes an important attachment figure, representing a secure base from
which to identify and explore specific psychological and psychosocial cri-
ses that the client may be facing.
From a psychoanalytic perspective, the role of the therapist is to pro-
vide a balance between the supportive and expressive elements of psycho-
therapy. For example, the initial function of the therapeutic relationship may
be to offer a supportive environment where difficult feelings can be ex-
pressed and contained. Later in therapy, however, there will be a need to
 Sarah Corrie 147

encompass the more expressive, interpretive elements of therapy that re-

flect the client’s increased ego strength and enhanced ability to tolerate
anxiety (Luborsky, 1984). Through enabling the client to articulate their
beliefs about themselves and others, and by offering up new possibilities
within the lived experience of the therapeutic relationship, it is ultimately
possible for the client to rebuild a world that feels safe and nurturing.
Whilst stepfamilies involving younger children permit relatively easy
access to other members of the family system, adult clients typically pres-
ent on an individual basis. As a function of their adulthood, they live inde-
pendent lives and do not necessarily wish to involve other members of
their family in the therapeutic process. This prevents a thorough assess-
ment of the family system in which the client is embedded. Nonetheless,
developing an understanding of family relationships can be achieved
through exploring the client’s attachment style based on reactions to past
and present separations and identifying specific schema that are held
about self and others. It is also possible for therapy to retain a systemic fo-
cus by exploring how responses to parental remarriage may be influenced
by the interaction between the stage of development of the stepparent and
that of the stepchild within a lifespan model. Within this context, the fol-
lowing questions are proposed as valuable heuristic aids for creating inno-
vative interventions according to the specific needs of an individual client
(see Table 2).

Thoughts for the Future

The aim of this paper has been to propose ways in which therapeutic
practice with adult stepchildren can be systematically advanced. A further
aim has been to draw attention to the dearth of available information on
what may represent a significant and emerging client group.
Whilst it is not suggested that family reconfiguration inevitably results
in the need for psychological intervention, therapists should remain mind-
ful of Salisbury’s (1999) observation that it is rare for stepfamily members
to request professional help. It may be the case, therefore, that therapists
are seeing a distinct client group with more complex psychological needs
underlying their adjustment difficulties.
Ultimately, in order to understand the needs of adult children in
stepfamilies more fully, it will be necessary to achieve a clearer picture of
their demographic characteristics as well as developing a distinct thera-
peutic evidence-base. Whilst this paper has aimed to provide some ideas
about how therapeutic practice with this client group can be systemati-
cally advanced, these ideas are yet to be empirically substantiated. How-
148 JOURNAL OF DIVORCE & REMARRIAGE

TABLE 2. Useful Clinical Questions for Developing Interventions with Adult Step-
children

• Which schema does the client hold about self, others and the world? Are these
schema essentially adaptive or maladaptive? Upon what early experiences might
these beliefs be based?
• Does the client display signs of specific early maladaptive schema that need to be a
direct target of intervention (such as core beliefs around abandonment or emotional
deprivation)?
• What beliefs does the client hold about family life, the sexual behaviour of adults
from different generations and the stability of intimate relationships? To what extent
do others in the family system share these beliefs?
• How does the client manage experiences of uncertainty and change in his/her life
(that is, how does he/she approach the processes of disequilibration, assimilation
and accommodation)?
• Is the client's attachment style fundamentally secure or insecure? What is the nature
and range of his/her adult attachments in terms of the network of relationships
formed within adult life? How can they be used as a source support at the current
time?
• What are the ages of the different family members involved and their corresponding
stages of lifespan development? Based on Erikson’s model, what psychological ten-
sions might the client, parent and stepparent be facing that could affect their reac-
tions to one another during family reconfiguration?
• How, if at all, are societal values and prejudices about stepfamilies impacting on the
client?

ever, as a point of departure, it is suggested that specific research

questions can be identified if they are grounded within the psychological
models outlined in this paper. Potentially useful research questions are il-
lustrated in Table 3.
Despite the lack of current information on the needs and characteristics
of mature stepfamilies, working with adult clients experiencing parental
remarriage provides therapists with a unique opportunity to facilitate
growth and change. Learning how to deal with the losses and transitions
inherent in changing family environments can equip clients to manage
more effectively the changes that are inherent in life itself. As Skeen et al.
(1985) suggest, understanding that rewarding relationships require effort is
a valuable insight at any age, providing new opportunities for personal
growth and the enhancement of existing relationships. By supporting adult
stepchildren through the process of transition, therefore, it is possible to
help them establish a healthy model of relationships for the future. This,
surely, is a legacy that is close to the hearts of all therapists.

NOTE
 Sarah Corrie 149

TABLE 3. Potential Research Questions for Understanding the Needs of Adult

Stepchildren

• Are specific schema related to specific types of difficulty with adjusting to parental re-
marriage?
• Are specific attachment styles related to specific types of difficulties?
• Is conflict more or likely to occur if both the adult child and the stepparent are in the
same stage of lifespan development?
• Are specific stages of lifespan development more associated with emotional distress
than others?

1. To ensure confidentiality the client’s name has been changed and any identifying
characteristics omitted.

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