CHANGE AND THOUGHT live very quickly, we want to do adults, having a job, money,

a comfortable life, we laugh but we pretend to the outside, and why all this wh
en we apparently are not as happy as we thought? The reason may be that we all p
ut our real idea on the grounds that we love, and emotions like we can. We live,
like it or not, in the world of emotions and feelings. We want to change the wo
rld and we are unable to do so because what does not "fall", we are not able to
internalize is that our domestic real world is one that is not cultivated, witho
ut working. We are who we are and not what we have. We are what we want to be, a
t bottom, but our refusal to strive to change (resistance to change) is preceded
by the inner classic "is that I can not." It is often "use" someone's finally d
epends to make us happy, we make life easier, make us feel, make us fly, we do .
.. We all try to come from outside to inside, to us and when we imbued with this
dynamic that cry from within, we want to be independent, self-sufficient, auton
omous, which, like it or not, will happen, will happen because all we want what
we have, each, within which is why happiness, freedom in its well understood, pl
easure, dreams, sexuality, everything starts from within one out. For all this (
honestly analyze it and you'll understand) I can be myself with someone else if
my life depends on her. What we really need is courage to be oneself, a situatio
n that does not conflict in any way with the commitment, loyalty, freedom and pr
osperity for living together, showing as a standard appropriate and effective co
mmunication. The aim therefore is to achieve the individual's ability to be the
protagonist of his own life, which is not synonymous with having to be alone to
do so. Those of us who decide to want to help educate the human being in their,
say, "emotional imperfections, we have an obligation, when we ask for help, to c
reate lines of communication channels to remove the" noise "and eliminate the ro
utine of silence that is, at times, which covers up our fears and thus get only
nurture our mutual insecurities. It's funny how sometimes paralyzes us topical p
hrases and used them to justify our actions to conceal a terror to deal with
ourselves and make that change which in essence we need or we hide them as if we
did settle on the life choices we have chosen are appropriate. Usually take onl
y part of those phrases. One of the most I've heard is that of José Ortega y Ga
sset: "I am myself and my circumstances ..." and for this and that fact marks me
I can not get out of it, is mine and so I'm for it. We read on and we have show
n that Ortega also said that "... if I save my circumstances except me." Why sho
uld I evolve and mature and adaptive ways to get obtain, without necessarily lea
ving social tax rate, I need to balance the ultimate goal of human happiness. I
know that it is very difficult to live our life as a harmonious whole, without f
anfare, without the daily problems and not so everyday. When we seem to have ach
ieved stability, something strong, unexpected, we live and we returned to the me
ntal chaos, the restlessness, to suffer yet another loss. What next?, Why me?, W
hat have I done to have to suffer? Logical questions, human, emotional, and for
which one must pass to get the appropriate focus of our new circumstances, harsh
and cruel as it is. We're back in the world of emotions, feelings, and we have
two possible options in every crisis: destruction (death) or opportunity to deal
with it and leave renewed and stronger (when one door closes a window opens ) E
verything, as usual, going to depend on our attitude towards this event that has
arisen. Yo. I depend on me, from the preparation to make the event, the need an
d desire for change or, on the other hand, the desire to regress to be feeding m
y beliefs, what they think, feel and measure with my scale values. Static I / a
or dynamic / a. I have to decide if I'm wrong, but not so wild and steep. Being
reflective (I know it costs a lot right now) is the form. Everything will change
in my thinking and my ability to ask for help if alone I can not. My feedback i
s positive if my thinking is positive (or at least I try,€because the road is m
ade up of small steps) even if it costs a lot of inner energy. Some people think
to be proactive in these situations is to be in constant motion and enter a fre
netic pace of activities, attitudes, apparent changes in one go back to your chi
ldhood roots, but do not make a "stop" to reconsider their schemes
mental and their deepest feelings. They do not want time to see his own face in
the mirror, see the pros and cons of the decision to be taken. It is now comes t
he classic "excuses" (which in the mind of an actual disability are not aware th
at you have one): "I need my space" "I do not feel free," "I have already decide
d and no more than talk, "" nothing can negotiate "... Generally there are two i
mportant questions why someone makes the decision, for example, to separate from
your partner: A difference in expectations from the situations and / or indiffe
rence, which may occur by a change of heart or a disproportionate difference in
development between different stages, so there is a large imbalance. But to see
that we have to be completely honest with ourselves because if we do not fall in
to the problem of being our own worst enemy, being an irrational, emotionally sp
eaking, to think that the "enemy" is another. Here are two individuals who try t
o live and reach an overall balance without success, perhaps because there is no
t initially individually. But there is guilty, is responsible for irreparable at
titudes, sometimes because they lack adequate skills and losing the opportunity,
on the other hand, to seek professional help to assess the circumstances with a
therapeutic perspective, with implications emotional, more objective. I suppose
you have heard the Latin phrase "homo homini LUPUM" which can be translated as
man is wolf to man, one is his own enemy, but there is another more positive Sen
eca: "homo homini RES SACRA, which can be translated as man is something sacred
to man. Two very different phrases that pose a very different position. So I thi
nk that is all to life. Choose your choice and works to the limit of your will o
n it thinking that if positive thinking can have obvious results, what do we avo
id the crisis by refusing to address the change is really needed? As always do n
ot mean anything to this article to create a space to think and analyze how it h
as to be one in life, because you, only you who must learn to think in any situa
tion independently and critically. Being happy requires maximum effort and is th
e most difficult goal that human beings have been proposed, but we are on the ro
ad if everyone, every individual, puts something on their part and change its la
rge and rich inner world. Do not run away from yourself job or fill your mind so
litude not confront your own fears unsolved. We are what we think and it is clea
r that thought can change it, but do not ask me to change mine,
change yours as mine is up to me and I'll do it for myself. If you feel good abo
ut yourself minimizing the imperfections of others which is not perfect because
it is "simply" a human being. JUAN JOSE LOPEZ NICOLAS. Family Counselor http://w
ww.terapiayfamilia.blogspot.com